Ladies Who Lunch

Ladies Who Lunch

United States

Ladies Who Lunch lets you sit at the table and explore topics often left out of polite conversation with YouTubers Ingrid Nilsen and Cat Valdes. Write in to join their dialogue about sex, relationships, social phobias and more as they approach life's dilemmas with compassion and a sense of humor. New episodes every week.


Losing the Fear Of Losing Your Virginity  

This week, we break into some common problems about virginity. How will you know when you're ready? What are the consequences you should consider before losing your virginity? How can you get over sex anxiety? We also explain whether or not you should practice with a vibrator, and how to talk to your partner about having your first sexual experience. No matter how your sex ed class defined virginity - as a gift, a stigma, a rite of passage, or a natural thing - it's yours to own, and you can do whatever you darn well please with it. Will you choose to ditch the fears and let virginity empower you?

Figuring Out Family Dynamics  

This week, special guest Meg DeAngelis joins our exploration through the impact of family in personal growth. What's the difference between being an only child, sharing families, and having a twin? Why are we more likely to fight with parents instead of friends? What are the perks of living alone? We also discuss how we survived past roommates, why Cat actually wants her sister to move to LA, and how to protect yourself from your concern for toxic family members. We can't control who ends up in our family tree - but we can control our expectations of them. Through the ups, the downs, the hugs, the tears - how will you let your family relationships affect your individuality?

Fetishes & Fantasies  

In this week's episode, we strip down the conversation around sexual fantasies and fetishes. How should you talk to your partner about your fantasy? Why is it considered weird if a woman joins the "locker room talk"? Would we ever try group sex? We also reveal what scenarios turn us on, what sexual device every lady should carry around, and whether or not it's wrong to shame the kink. Sharing your fetishes or fantasies can be awkward and uncomfortable. But once the idea is out in the open, just have fun with it. Will you lift the taboo and seek out your sexual desires?

Unveiling the Mask of Makeup  

This week, we peel off the layers of issues surrounding makeup. Does makeup undermine feminism? Why do - or don't - people use makeup? At what point does your self-worth rely too much on your beauty routine? We also debate why wearing makeup in the workplace can be a lose-lose situation, why Cat had a makeup-free meetup, and how to stop seeking validation for your appearance. Whether you use makeup as a creative outlet, a way to have "me time," or as a confidence booster, it should always be your choice. How do you define your own beauty?

Attacking Your Anxiety  

This week, we dive into the deep, dark pool of anxiety. What are some common anxiety symptoms? How can you calm yourself during panic attacks? How do you find an anxiety treatment that works for you? We also explore the effects of therapy and medication, explain why sometimes it's best to give up, and help a listener whose anxiety is affecting her personality. Battling your anxiety seems like a daunting task, but avoidance will only make it worse. Will you take the baby steps to stop living in fear?

No Shame in Sex Drives  

In this week's episode, we take a trip through sex drives. Why do we assume men have higher sex drives than women? Will your libido die out as you age, or does it get stronger? How can we prevent the shame placed on women for acting on their sexual desires? We also explore how to break free from a suppressed sex drive, why women in their 30s are especially horny, and how to communicate to your partner if you want sex but they're never in the mood. Everyone's sex drive is different, so we shouldn't let general cultural standards dictate our sexual behavior. When will you proudly claim your spot on the sex drive spectrum?

Don't Tell Me How To Dress  

This week, we dissect the problematic idea of "dressing your age." Why are we so quick to criticize the appearances of older women? Is there really a certain way adults should dress? How do you know if your beauty routine is feeding into cultural expectations? We also share our opinions on wrinkles, the effects of advertising in the beauty industry, and the best responses to judgment about fashion decisions and big boobs. Society has convinced us that you need to behave, look, and dress a certain way as the years go by - but at the end of the day it's your body, your choice. How will you embrace your body's natural progression and grow comfortable in your own skin?

Break the Habit of Lying  

In this week's episode, we sort through the many factors of lying. Why do people lie? Are there situations when too much honesty can be cruel? How do you stop lying? We also compare compulsive liars vs. pathological liars, explore lying as a coping mechanism, and help a listener forgive herself for being untruthful about her sexuality. Confessing the facts is often followed by guilt, shame, and pain. But accepting a life of deceit is a lie to yourself, which can be the most dangerous of all. Will you overcome the fear and take a chance on the truth?

The #Debate  

In this episode, we jump into the storm of the 2016 presidential debate. Are Trump's obscene comments justified as common "locker room talk"? As feminists, could we ever empathize with Trump supporters? What topics do we want them to discuss in the next debate? We also share our political evolutions from conservatives to liberals, Clinton's biggest weaknesses, and our greatest fears about a Trump presidency. Neither candidate is perfect, but take a good, long look at the options. Do you want a president who breaks societal barriers and actually understands federal policies? Or a racist who perpetuates violence and sexual assault?

The Female Orgasm  

This week, sex educator Laci Green joins us to clear up the fog surrounding the female orgasm. What are the different ways to have an orgasm? How can you overcome the stigma around women having orgasms? We also debunk the worst media myths about sex, share the details of Ingrid's most intense orgasm ever, explore the female sexual anatomy, and explain how to effectively communicate to your partner to achieve an orgasm. Since this topic has often been considered taboo, the confusion can make it difficult to climax. How will you break down these walls to get the orgasm you deserve? P.S. This episode is brought to you by Casper. Thanks Casper!

The Complications of Cheating  

In this episode, we dip into the murky grey waters of cheating. What pulls people into infidelity? Can that betrayal ever make the relationship stronger? How can you tell if you're walking down the path to cheating? We also debate if a cheater should always confess to their partner, investigate human nature in monogamous relationships, and share the dilemmas of being "the other woman." Although we're quick to blame cheaters as bad people, there are often underlying reasons why someone would enter a tangled situation. What's really keeping you involved in this toxic triangle? P.S. Thank you to Smile Direct Club for supporting our podcast! Get 50% off your $95 evaluation fee by visiting

Period Problems  

This week, we explore one of our favorite topics - periods! As a bonus, Cora founder Molly Hayward joins us to help answer some menstruation mysteries. How is your poop affected during this time of the month? What is the one period color that you should worry about? How can your period make sex more exciting? We also share our most horrifying period stories and guide a listener through tampon 101. Nowadays, there's a huge variety of products to suit all types of comfort levels. But there's still a ton of progress we can make, both nationally and globally. How will you open up the conversation and help erase the taboo? P.S. Thank you to HelloFresh for supporting Ladies Who Lunch! Go to and use the code lwl to get $35 off first week of deliveries.

Protection Against Toxic People  

This week, we explore the different tools to handling toxic people. What are the red flags of a toxic person? Should you confront them about the situation or just let it go? We also discuss getting involved in a friend's toxic relationship, depersonalizing someone's projected negativity, and protecting yourself from a loved one who is constantly unstable and unsupportive. There are plenty of ways to deal with these types of people, whether it's by establishing boundaries or killing them with kindness. What will you do to stop their poison from seeping into your life? P.S. Thank you to Glossier for supporting Ladies Who Lunch! Get 20% off your first purchase at by using the promo code lwl.

Are You Racist?  

This week we sink deep into the topic of racism - not an easy conversation, but undoubtedly a necessary one. How do you know if you're racist? Are ignorance and silence harmful? Can we ever be completely free of prejudiced thoughts? We also explain why the term "white privilege" perpetuates a racist mentality, why good intentions don't excuse discriminatory behavior, and how to confront someone you love about their bigoted remarks. It may be 2016 but there's still a lot of progress to be made. How will you be active, bring about awareness, and combat the sugarcoated reality our society uses to deal with racism?

Breakups, Part Four: Dating Your Ex  

For this bonus finale of our breakup series, we debate the dilemma of getting back together with an ex. How can you tell if you actually want to rekindle the relationship, or just be friends? How much time should pass after the initial breakup? Even though the good times might convince you to get back together, you both need a mutual understanding about the ugly times, too. Can you acknowledge the past, forgive your partner, and start anew? P.S. Thank you to ELOQUII for supporting this episode of Ladies Who Lunch! To receive 50% off your first item and 40% off any additional items, go to and use the promo code LWL at check out.

Breakups, Part Three: Friend Breakups  

In the third installment of the breakup series, we dig into the sometimes more painful, more awkward predicament of the friend breakup. How do you know when you should deactivate a friendship? How did we prevent our own conflict from ruining our relationship? We also share how to minimize the drama in a friend group, and help a listener who is skeptical of her ex-friend's intentions for returning to her social group. Even though it's easier to walk away and quietly let a sour situation die, some people are worth fighting for. Are you willing to confront the issue, communicate the problem, and heal your broken friendship?

Breakups, Part Two: The Rejectors  

Our second episode of this breakup series delves into the dilemma of being the rejector, the one to call it quits. How do you know if there's a right time to break up? How can you break up with someone by being direct, and without being an asshole? We also compare the pros and cons of taking a break, and discuss how pressure from society may convince us to stay in an unwanted relationship. Debating a breakup is often riddled with guilt for hurting your partner and fear of never finding "the one." But honestly ask yourself - Do you really want that person? Or do you just want the relationship?

Breakups, Part One: The Rejected  

We kick off our breakup series with a topic that floods our inbox: rejection. How do you deal with the heartache of getting dumped? Is it ever healthy to stay in touch with your ex after they break up with you? What do you do when you have the urge to obsessively follow your ex on social media? Surviving the emotional aftermath of a breakup is complex and exhausting. How do you move forward with seemingly unbearable heartache?

Freedom From Regret  

Regrets -- we've all had a few. This week, we explore the different ways to handle those situations that didn't quite end in our favor. What have we regretted the most? Is it possible to have no regrets? Can you ever overcome the remorse that results from your decisions? We also share how Ingrid's second grade haircut spiraled into regrets over friendship, how to use FOMO to your advantage, and help a listener who can't shake a life-changing loss. When we dwell on the "what ifs" that could've been, it's natural to feel ashamed, disappointed, or even hopeless. But if that paralyzes your ability to move on, you might be in trouble. How will you climb over the barriers of regret and embrace the life that is yours?

How We Turned Our Hobbies into Careers  

This week, we discuss the ebb and flow of using passion to pay the bills. How do you deal with judgment and criticism from friends, family, or reputable companies? We also talk about the pros and cons of working for yourself, the fear of selling out, and the anxiety around career paths that come with no guarantees. How do we navigate times of uncertainty in a world that demands self confidence and doesn't always embrace the humbling moments of mediocrity we all experience?

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