The Cracked Podcast

The Cracked Podcast

United States

The Cracked Podcast is an extension of the editorial team discussions that shape the brilliant articles and sketches on Cracked. Cohosts Jack O'Brien and Michael Swaim, along with an impressive roster of guests, use the platform to identify and dissect pop culture tropes, debunk myths and generally try to reach the large demographic of people who would enjoy their site's content if only they'd learn to read.

Episodes

Why Every Billionaire Is Becoming A Doomsday Prepper  

Sometime around when Donald Trump started winning state primaries a year ago, the national mood went from, "Damn Daniel," to "oh fuck we're actually going to die in a rain of nuclear hellfire." That happens when a sitting US President attacks an almost-nuclear state on Twitter, as was the case a few weekends ago.With climate change, market instability, loss of privacy, the rise of fascism and a hair-triggered President all coming to a boil around the same time, it's understandable for images of apocalypse and dystopia to weigh heavily on the mind.So, this week the Cracked Podcast is doing an apocalypse grab-bag. Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked's Alex Schmidt and Saundra Sorenson to talk about bizarre apocalypse-level events that already happened and stories from places like Nigeria, Iraq, the Philippines and even Canada, where either natural disaster, terrorism or totalitarian government have turned everyday life into a dystopia.  Footnotes:Article/Video: Jalopnik: This is the Video CNN Will Play When The World Ends:  https://goo.gl/gvIO9Y Article: Cracked: 4 Nightmare Apocalypses Humanity Forgot Were Possible:  https://goo.gl/U48Y3v Article: Cracked: 6 Real Cities Destroyed By Incredibly Bizarre Apocalypses:  https://goo.gl/XHAvGG Article: Cracked: 6 Apocalypse Scenarios Society Says We're Overdue For:  https://goo.gl/SaBKaG Article: Cracked: 5 Horrifying Apocalyptic Scenarios  (That Have Already Happened):  https://goo.gl/5COk09 Article: The New Yorker: Doomsday Prep for the Super-Rich:  https://goo.gl/GBcpKk Article: The New Yorker: The Really Big One:  https://goo.gl/Y2QxOj  Article: Cracked: Evacuating A Modern City: 5 Realities in a Real Apocalypse:  https://goo.gl/24yA3h Book: Dave Eggers: Zeitoun:  https://goo.gl/WFXXF2 Article: The New Yorker: Hosed:  https://goo.gl/Rsg2aK Article: Smithsonian Magazine: Why Did Greenland's Vikings Vanish?:  https://goo.gl/vuP4C3

How We'd Fix These 4 Broken Franchises  

Big news! This summer, Hollywood is delivering us our 6th Spiderman movie in the last 15 years. Fun! Time to re-hash all of our favorite story beats like dead uncles, having great responsibilities and kissing upside-down.So yeah, it seems like for the nth summer in a row, the great minds in the Hollywood dream factory are officially out of ideas. Our question is: why? When there are so many amazing stories from real life or incredible works that have yet to be adapted, why another Transformers?This is an issue only the After Hours crew (sans Michael) can figure out. On this week's episode, Jack O'Brien is joined by Soren Bowie, Daniel O'Brien and Katie Willert to fix reboots, throw out adaptations and pitch unbelievable real stories that would make for incredible movies, if only Hollywood had the balls to produce them.Footnotes:Article: Cracked 5 Really Awesome Movies Hidden Inside Really Crappy Movies:  https://goo.gl/gZliXV Article: LA Times: Zankou Chicken's Tragic Family Rift Impedes Chain's Growth:  https://goo.gl/xz1SXG Podcast: Radiolab: Outside Westgate:  https://goo.gl/kp2hP9  (about Nairobi terror attacks in mall - soren talks about)Book: Jennet Conant: The Irregulars: Roald Dahl and the British Spy Ring in Wartime Washington:  https://goo.gl/3GJoqe Book: F. Scott Fitzgerald: The Diamond as Big as the Ritz:  https://goo.gl/C6nQ7E Podcast: The Dollop: Lobotomy:  https://goo.gl/xSBkQr Article: LA Times: Colonel Griffith J. Griffith, One of LA's More Colorful Figures:  https://goo.gl/P4k3H Book: Bonar Menninger: Mortal Error: The Shot That Killed JFK:  https://goo.gl/8xN2Dd Documentary: JFK: The Smoking Gun:  https://goo.gl/hTWyy7 Article: The New Yorker: Bill James, True-Crime Obsessive, On The Genre's Enduring Importance:  https://goo.gl/Z8zhe4 Book: Bill James: Popular Crime:  https://goo.gl/9vuTiM Article: Cracked: 5 Insane 'What If' Scenarios That Almost Changed Everything:  https://goo.gl/irzui9 Article: New York Times: LBJ's Bravado and a Secret Service Under Scrutiny:  https://goo.gl/JzmaiU Book: L.A. Meyer: Bloody Jack:  https://goo.gl/GeCQPM Book: Brain Jacques: Redwall:  https://goo.gl/AXfiaa Article: Smithsonian Magazine: The Heiress to a Gun Empire Built a Mansion Forever Haunted by the Blood Money that Built It:  https://goo.gl/oJGQuq

Commonplace Ideas Invented More Recently Than You Think  

Nowadays, there's a huge emphasis on eating natural foods. Staying away from GMOs, pesticides, and processed sugars is generally thought of as a good thing. Some call it the paleo diet and it's a way to harken back to a simpler time, when our ancestors ate gathered fruits and hunted animals.Going paleo is very noble and all, but the problem is: the plants and animals we eat are nothing like they were thousands of years ago, let a hundred years ago. Before test tubes were ever a part of the equation, we selectively bred everything from cows and chickens to apples and bananas. You'd barf in your mouth just looking at an OG banana, let alone trying to eat it. And cows? They were bred from their ancestors, cattle-like animals called aurochs, who would fuck you up if you tried milking them.The food we eat today and think of as normal is just one example of a historical blindspot we have where we think commonplace objects and concepts have been around forever. But in this week's episode, Jack O'Brien is joined by Michael Swaim and Teresa Lee to discuss how things like food, love, racism and mourning dead children are all surprisingly recent developments.Footnotes:Article: Cracked: 7 Concepts We Totally Take For Granted, Like White People:  https://goo.gl/dVJVIL Article: Cracked: 6 Man-Made Things You Totally Thought Were Natural:  https://goo.gl/QvjHtN Article: Cracked: 5 Simple Things You Won't Believe Are Recent Inventions:  https://goo.gl/NzAfxQ Article: Seeker: Cows Almost Impossible to Domesticate, DNA Reveals:  https://goo.gl/w6Uai1 Article: Pacific Standard: How Lobster Got Fancy:  https://goo.gl/qa1LaL Article: Gawker: 'Breathtaking' Document Reveals Pepsi's Logo is Pinnacle of Entire Universe:  https://goo.gl/9tYW Article: Time: The Invention of Teenagers:  https://goo.gl/gWgJDs Article: The New York Times: Who's White?:  https://goo.gl/fAzpSE Podcast: Duke University Center for Documentary Studies: Seeing White:  https://goo.gl/6fWI65 Text: Ralph Waldo Emerson: English Traits:  https://goo.gl/LBPZFQ Article: The Atlantic: Thomas Jefferson: Radical and Racist:  https://goo.gl/F9McpQ Scholarly Article: Did The Ancients Care When Their Children Died?:  https://goo.gl/ozHK5a The Romantic Love Test:  https://goo.gl/ITk7yA This episode is brought to you by Louis C.K. 2017 on Netflix, Harry’s (www.harrys.com/cracked), and Adam and Eve (www.adamandeve.com code: CRACKED).

My Small Town Can Fit In A Building: Life in Small-Town USA  

The 2016 Election made it clear that we live in an America divided.  There is a struggle between small-town and big-city America that comes down to more than just ideology. There's a general misunderstanding of how we live life that both sides fall victim to. To one side, the cramped and cavernous nature of city streets is straight-up anxiety-inducing. To the other, it's a surprise that dirt roads even exist at all. Didn't we get rid of those decades ago? But if the road is made of dirt, how will the driverless Uber know where to go? This is why Trump's President, ya'll!In one bubble, entertainment is taking in a show or a concert; in the other, entertainment is muddin' or taking random pills. One isn't better than the other. There are no judgements here. It's just that things that are absolutely commonplace in one world are so completely alien to the people in the other.On this week's podcast, city-boy Jack O'Brien is joined by columnist John Cheese, who still lives in small-town Illinois, and comedian Billy Wayne Davis who grew up in rural Tennessee but now travels the world and has seen the absurdity in how both sides live. Later, John Cheese and Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) break-down their formative years in small-town Illinois and how the death of the local business turned their community into a living hell.Make sure to get tickets to our next live Cracked Podcast on Saturday, April 8th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Jack is joined by Daniel O'Brien, Soren Bowie and Katie Willert from 'After Hours' to talk about reboots we'd love to see, great movies hidden in bad movies and other movie ideas way too awesome to actually get made. Tickets are $7 and available here:  https://goo.gl/kTFUYQ Footnotes:Billy Wayne Davis on Twitter:  https://goo.gl/rJ1Fqh Billy Wayne Davis Live at Third Man Records: https://goo.gl/Niyn2N Video: Billy Wayne Davis on 'Conan': https://youtu.be/T8ShD0RzOsU Article: Cracked: 5 Things Only Poor Teens Understand About Poverty: https://goo.gl/GShCBq Article: Cracked: 4 Common Morals Designed to Keep You Poor: https://goo.gl/NPvnQw Article: Cracked: 4 Things Politicians Will Never Understand About Poor People: https://goo.gl/HWZuy Article: Cracked: 5 Telltale Sings You Grew Up Poor: https://goo.gl/Ct5kBf Article: Cracked: I Was Raised As A Racist: 6 Weird Things I Learned: https://goo.gl/IkwLlD Article: Cracked: How Half of America Lost It's F**king Mind: https://goo.gl/KBJs5W Article: Cracked: I Investigated Fox News' Poverty Claims (On My Mom): https://goo.gl/Lm8WqR Jack O'Brien's Playlist on Spotify:  https://goo.gl/hWjsFJ

Marketing Lies You've Been Duped Into Believing  

We all know consciously to take advertising with a grain of salt. Those McDonald's burgers can't look as manicured in person the way they do in the ads. Examples like that are easy to catch. It's harder to spot false advertising when companies are bending the truth so much, your bullshit detectors don't know which way is up. Take Listerine mouthwash. It was originally sold as a surgical antiseptic until some ad men in the 1920s were like, "if we told everyone to wash their mouths out with this industrial cleaner every day, then we'd make so much money we could light our cigars with the cash, but how...". The answer was in a book of medical terminology. They looked up the fanciest word for bad breath -- halitosis -- and made an ad campaign telling everyone it was a chronic disease with only one cure."Hey, sonny boy! Does your dame ever tell ya you have bad breath?""Why, yes mister!""That's simply because you're dying son. Say here, drink this poison, BUT SPIT IT OUT FIRST. And do it every day for the rest of your life."And 90 years later we still use Listerine and still think halitosis is is a disease and not just latin for brush your damn teeth.Modern movies do this too. Sometimes if studios have a real clunker on their hands, they'll cut a trailer that's so unrepresentative of the movie, you would want to sue to get your money back. A lot of times this happens to children's movies with disastrous results for the parents that think they're about to spend 2 hours with a rapping kangaroo.So on this week's podcast, Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked writers Carmen Angelica and JM McNab and producer Brett Rader for a discussion of horribly misleading movie trailers, straight-up advertising lies and the contemporary commercials that are messing with your perception of reality.Footnotes:Article: Cracked: Movies That Were Waaaaay Darker & Crazier Than Advertised:  https://goo.gl/w918NK Article: Cracked: The 6 Most Hilariously Misleading Movie Trailers:  https://goo.gl/9BLjqf Article: Cracked: 5 Things Movie Trailers Need to Stop Doing:  https://goo.gl/C8nfA5 Article: Cracked: 6 Dumbass Publicity Stunts That Fooled Everyone:  https://goo.gl/ypXnqc Article: Cracked: 6 Iconic Things You Won't Believe Began as Publicity Stunts:  https://goo.gl/0Rq4G Video: Helpful Honda Ad:  https://goo.gl/WfKsEn Video: Chevrolet "Real People" Ad:  https://goo.gl/PfPrvN Article: The News Wheel: Are Chevrolet's "Real People, Not Actors" Car Commercials Fake?:  https://goo.gl/aX2sua Video: If "Real People" Commercials Were Real Life:  https://goo.gl/n7agpC Video: Aaron Paul on The Price is Right:  https://goo.gl/LoUkIW Video: Josh Androsky on The Price is Right:  https://goo.gl/3abpcs Follow Jack O'Brien on Twitter:  https://twitter.com/jack_obrien Follow Carmen Angelica on Twitter:  https://twitter.com/c armesancheesesFollow JM Mcnab on Twitter:  https://twitter.com/jmmcnabagain Follow Brett Rader on Twitter:  https://twitter.com/brettrader

8 Unlikely Vacation Spots From Fictional Universes  

Ahhhh, mid-March. Time to pack the bros, the beers and the board shorts into the station wagon and drive down to the beach because it's SPRING BREAK WOOO. But instead of going to Florida or Cancún , the Cracked Podcast is taking a detour to 8 fictional locales.Jack O'Brien is joined by special guest-host Daniel Van Kirk for trips to Amity Island, Zootopia, and GTA's Vice City in our attempt to figure out best place to take a fictional vacation. They're joined by comics Blake Wexler, Jamie Loftus, Alison Stevenson, Josh Androsky and Eric Lampaert for a journey that will take us through the lives of Fraiser, the Gilmore Girls and Satan.Footnotes:Blake Wexler on Twitter:  https://goo.gl/WJtxjQ Jamie  Loftus on Twitter:  https://goo.gl/RokQpk Alison Stevenson on  Twitter :  https://goo.gl/eYyaOU Josh  Androsky on Twitter :  https://goo.gl/O5aQSO Eric  Lampaert on Twitter :  https://goo.gl/b70FTt

The Shockingly Recent Race Riot You've Never Heard Of  

A brief glance at the cartoon version of America makes you think the South is pretty racist. Look at them, with their Confederate flags and voter ID laws! But while you were sleeping, the blue states were up to some pretty racist shit too. It's just that they've got better PR. For example, one of the biggest and most violent anti-segregation fights in US history didn't take place in 1950s Mississippi or Alabama, but 1970s Boston. The 70s! In Massachusetts! The land of Kennedys, Afflecks and liberal arts colleges was faced with the desegregation of schools and was like, "yo George Wallace, hold my beer!"To discuss some of the secretly f#&*ed up modern history of the United States, Jack O'Brien and Michael Swaim are joined by the guys from 'The Dollop': Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds. They discuss the Boston busing riots of the 70s, the comically-liberal blue state with secret ties to the KKK and why we're about to live through the Enron crisis all over again.Footnotes:The Dollop: https://goo.gl/8O7wNl The Dollop's List of Sources: https://goo.gl/gxXHza Podcast: The Dollop: Boston Busing 1974: https://goo.gl/BUPukJ Podcast: The Dollop: Oregon and the Ku Klux Klan: https://goo.gl/x4rrUf Podcast: The Dollop: Enron: https://goo.gl/3bWy1J Image: 11 Nations of America Map: https://goo.gl/vYXCPQ Article: US News & World Report: A Flag, A Busing Fight and a Famous Photograph: https://goo.gl/bxvKSZ Documentary: BBC: HyperNormalisation: https://goo.gl/77XQpb Article: Buzzfeed News: How Teens in the Balkans Are Duping Trump Supporters With Fake News: https://goo.gl/kyOEKO Video: Oregon Whale Explosion: https://goo.gl/gd5iPo The Cracked Podcast: Why Class in America Isn't Just About Income: https://goo.gl/2tliZx Article: Siderea: Class (American): https://goo.gl/tlmX4S This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED), and Coca Cola & Powerade (www.coke.com/alwaysready.)

How Ann Coulter and Milo Yiannopoulos Are Playing You  

It's become your daily morning ritual. Wake up. Open Twitter. And here come's your fix. It's something like, "Trump Surrogate Says Jews in the Holocaust Didn't Have it So Bad!" and you're off to the races. How could he!? Do they know how insensitive that is!? And so on, and so forth until tomorrow, when it's something else. It's the rage machine and it exists on both sides. For every "Trump Eats Steak Well Done With Ketchup," you see on on the left, folks on the right will see something like "Communist Sympathizer Lena Dunham Thinks Pedophiles Should Teach Kindergarten." And the big secret is: both sides are getting played. The nonstop outrage engine is a contrivance, a counterfeit system made by people trying to profit off notoriety, and fueled by humanity's physiological addiction to anger. We hate it. And we love it. And we can't fucking stop.On this week's podcast, Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked editors Jason Pargin (aka David Wong), Katie Golden and Alex Schmidt to break-down how the non-stop rage machine works, who's profiting from it, and why this snake eating its tail is so addictive to the human psyche.Footnotes:Article: Cracked: 5 Ways to Stay Sane in an Era of Non-Stop Outrage: https://goo.gl/yQ5qan Article: Cracked: 7 Creepy Ways Corporations Are Turning You Into an Addict: https://goo.gl/nbQJhb Cracked Podcast: Why the Food Industry is Evil: https://goo.gl/QsCyyC Article: The New Yorker: The Hell You Say: https://goo.gl/1qOLI0 Article: Rand Corporation: The Russian Firehose of Falsehood Propaganda Model: https://goo.gl/CmrBJe Check out  our new series   ' After the Trump '  on Cracked: https://goo.gl/dDcGWZ

25 Bizarrely Specific Ways Movies Get Reality Wrong  

It's not something that you consciously notice, but movies speak to us in a secret language. They use a special shorthand to convey ideas or explain plot in the most efficient way possible. There's one problem though: they do it in the same couple dozen ways and recycle them over and over. And they need to stop. Or at least invent some new ones.Is someone's life crumbling away after a break-up? Just give them a beard and litter their apartment with Chinese food cartons. Want to show someone has a house or apartment, but no possessions? How about some well-placed Chinese food cartons? Is someone pulling an all-nighter with their work? More Chinese food cartons!If you're a person who even casually watches movies, you'll know so many of these the instant we bring them up and you'll never unsee them in any film going forward. To break down 25 of the biggest offenders, Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked's Carmen Angelica, Soren Bowie and Daniel O'Brien. They talk about how people brush their teeth in movies, how men try to steal kisses and why you can never trust a fictional male nurse.Remember to buy tickets to our next live taping of The Cracked Podcast on this Saturday, March 11th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Jack and the gang are going to talk about Amity Island, Jurassic World and movies where vacations go awry in an attempt to figure out the best spring break you should take while vacationing in a fictional universe.Tickets are $7 and available here:  https://goo.gl/Li0ocH Footnotes:Podcast: Cracked: Dumb Movie Tropes That Need to Die Already: https://goo.gl/oMk0jv Video: Cracked: 6 Bizarrely Specific Scenes  Hollywood Won't Quit Using: https://goo.gl/i1Bll2 Video: Cracked: 4 Movie Straw Men Characters That Keep Showing Up: https://goo.gl/17JVkG Video: Cracked: 7 Bizarrely Specific Ways Movies Get Normal Jobs Wrong: https://goo.gl/lvqPpo Article: Cracked: 4 Bizarrely Specific Rules That Exist in Movie Universes: https://goo.gl/Hs9iGT Article: Cracked: 3 Bizarrely Specific Job Trends in Movies: https://goo.gl/a4NL9 Article: Cracked 4 Products That Only Exist in Movies: https://goo.gl/q4RAF Cracked Photoplasties About Movie Tropes: https://goo.gl/2BsDGG , https://goo.gl/x4QfQ , https://goo.gl/qnQZQr , https://goo.gl/gYZfr Article: The New Yorker: What Did Jesus Do? (Actual Logic vs. Narrative Logic): https://goo.gl/4c126Q Article: The Hathor Legacy: Why Film Schools Teach Screenwriters Not To Pass The Bechdel Test: https://goo.gl/MMdcbt This episode is brought to you by Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/cracked) and Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED).

Lies You Believe About Jesus, Islam And Other Religions  

What separates the baby religions from the big ones? Is there anything specific that makes Catholicism or Islam more important than the shrine to The Noid that I have in my closet? Some religions make you go to mass or travel to Mecca, mine makes me eat pizza in the nude at least twice a week. The point we're trying to make is that what seems fringe or crazy now may have a billion devoted followers a thousand years from now. Mormonism was about as fringe as you could get a hundred years ago, less than a million followers, but now the there are around 16 million members and counting. Is there any religion that's out there now that's in the same place Mormonism was 100 years ago?To get a better understanding of some of these lesser-known religions and if they'll stand the test of time, Jack O'Brien's guest this week is Reza Aslan, who has a PhD in the study of religion and whose new show 'Believer' on CNN throws him head-first into the beliefs and practices of obscure religions. Among Scientology and Santa Muerte, they talk about the implausible origins of biblical literalism, the rare disorder that has tourists in Jerusalem thinking they're the messiah and a few big things that'll change your notions of Christianity and Islam.Remember to buy tickets to our next live taping of The Cracked Podcast on Saturday, March 11th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Jack and the gang are going to talk about Amity Island, Jurassic World and movies where vacations go awry in an attempt to figure out the best spring break you should take while vacationing in a fictional universe.Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/Li0ocH Footnotes:TV Show: Believer with Reza Aslan: https://goo.gl/xvhvno Book: Reza Aslan: Zealot: https://goo.gl/qIXXdu Video: Reza Aslan Viral Interview on Fox News: https://goo.gl/SBTBT5 Article: Cracked: 5 Ridiculous Things You Probably Believe Islam: https://goo.gl/aDLjO Article: Cracked: 5 Myths You Probably Believe About Major Religions: https://goo.gl/qHreXh Article: The Telegraph: Jerusalem Syndrome: The Madness That Grips Foreigners on the Streets of the Holy City: https://goo.gl/IW1YUI This episode is brought to you by Blue Apron and ZipRecruiter.

Cracked's 2017 Fake Oscar Awards  

Who can forget the classic Oscars showdown between 'The Artist' and, uh, 'Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close'? Most of us can and did, in fact. Great job, Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences! Way to keep your fingers on the pulse of American filmmaking by giving gold out to the 1930s-style silent film. Trailblazing. The Oscars have proven year after year that they're not the best barometer for judging the best or even the most popular films from a given year. Often they're really only judging movies on the criteria of being appealing to a group of old, white men with film industry jobs. Look at three of the last five best picture winners and their subject matter: 'Birdman'– an aging actor known for playing superheroes strives for artistic legitimacy; 'Argo'– Hollywood producers save hostages in Iran; 'The Artist'– Remember silent films? And let's pencil 'La La Land' into that list– an struggling actress and a struggling musician fall in love, become successful. Hollywood obviously has a problem being objective about movies wherein the subject matter is itself.So this week we're being objective for Hollywood. Jack O'Brien welcomes Cracked's David Bell, Adam Ganser and Brett Rader to discuss 2016's Best Picture nominees and award movies in some made-up categories that we'd like to see incorporated into the Oscar broadcast. Later they took a look back at the 2012 Oscars in which 'The Artist' won best picture and redistribute the awards with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight. Footnotes:Cracked Podcast: Why We Should Wait 5 Years to Award the Oscars: https://goo.gl/COc0zQ Article: Cracked: 5 Problems Haunting The Oscars (Besides Lack of Diversity): https://goo.gl/mMgAQG Article: Cracked: 5 Reasons the Oscars Matter Even Less Than You Thought: https://goo.gl/bql0 This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED), Lincoln In the Bardo, and Away (www.awaytravel.com/cracked).

Why Modern People Might Have The Worst Sex Lives Ever  

When you think about ancient human history, you probably think about sex, right? Who doesn't? And when you do, you probably imagine in your head (because you love envisioning your eldest relatives gettin' down) a very bland, puritanical form of sex where they do it through a sheet once every other year and only to conceive, right? Well, sorry to make you throw up in your mouth a little bit, but your ideas of chastened ancestors living repressed lives are as wrong as the next images we're about to put in your mind: ancient humans were nasty little horndogs. In fact, the basically standard modern ideas of monogamy and fidelity are extremely recent developments in human history. They've only been around for about 10,000 years -- a blink of the evolutionary eye.So what was the ancient hunter-gatherer love like actually like? And what can we learn about our own sex lives from looking at how the cavemen got down? A lot, actually. So we asked an expert. By studying prehistoric human cultures and the sex lives of our two closest genetic relatives, chimps and bonobos, Dr. Christopher Ryan has some pretty eye-opening stuff to share about human sexuality. So Jack O'Brien welcomes Dr. Ryan on this bonus episode of The Cracked Podcast to talk with Teresa Lee and Michael Swaim about swinging tribes-people, primitive vibrators and ape balls in a conversation that is bound to make you rethink everything you know about love and sexuality.Footnotes:Book: Christopher Ryan & Cacilda Jetha: Sex At Dawn: https://goo.gl/NkZVye Podcast: Christopher Ryan: Tangentially Speaking: https://goo.gl/uWl7mK Scholarly Article: Michael Gurven & Hilliard Kaplan: Longevity Among Hunter-Gatherers: https://goo.gl/9LXdBo Article: Jared Diamond: The Worst Mistake in the History of the Human Race: https://goo.gl/4k9zM Article: Cracked: 5 Gender Stereotypes That Used To Be The Exact Opposite: https://goo.gl/zgnNG Article: Cracked: 6 Horrifying Facts That Get Left Out Of History: https://goo.gl/ItWwcK Article: Cracked: 7 X-Rated Traditions That Prove History Was Horny As F*$&: https://goo.gl/9XxknD Article: Cracked: The 6 Most Cynical Exploitations of Romantic Love in History: https://goo.gl/Hik16 Article: Cracked: 6 Factors That Secretly Influence Who You Have Sex With: https://goo.gl/oIAFD Article: Cracked: 5 Insignificant Things That Determine Who You Have Sex With: https://goo.gl/0i8cQ

Jafar Is Disney Moses: Secretly Heroic Villains  

Did you ever notice how every movie villain is just really ugly beyond belief? Emperor Palpatine? WRINKLED UP UGGO. Jafar? POINTY FACE. Scar? LITERALLY NAMED AFTER HIS FACIAL DEFORMITY.It's fucking dark when you think about how many movies this applies to; how the villain is usually someone trying to live a normal or equal life, but their ugliness just gets in the way. 'The Incredibles' is a perfect example. The villain is an ugly-little redhead kid who just wants for everybody to be a superhero, but the Incredibles are like NNNNNNOPE and throw him into a jet engine because only they should get to be superheroes.Yeah, of course Syndrome kills like 30 other superheroes and sets a giant death robot loose on a major metropolis, but just go with us for this thought experiment. His heart was in the right place. On this week's podcast Jack O'Brien welcomes Cracked's own Katie Goldin and Michael Swaim to unpack this trope and how you can see ugly bad guys ostensibly trying to do the right thing in franchises from Disney to The Lord of the Rings.Footnotes:Video: Cracked: 4 Disney Movie Villains Who Were Right All Along: https://goo.gl/ddcdE7 Article: Cracked: 9 Famous Movie Villains Who Were Right All Along: https://goo.gl/YHj25 Article: Cracked: 5 Movie Villains Who Were Right The Whole Time: https://goo.gl/2P99EY Article: Cracked: 6 Reasons The Jedi Would Be The Villain In Any Sane Movie: https://goo.gl/rPHaAO Article: Cracked: You Really Have No Idea Who The Villain Of Frozen Is: https://goo.gl/SsbdFm Book: Chuck Klosterman: I Wear the Black Hat: https://goo.gl/oxij5c Video: Kanye West: All Day (Live at the 2015 BRIT Awards): https://goo.gl/xeDgWu This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/cracked) and Harry’s (www.harrys.com/cracked).

The Mind Melting World of Putin's Russia  

If you've followed the news recently, you may have noticed the tiny little superpower Sarah Palin can see from her house has emerged from its slumber and re-injected itself into American politics. Not since the Cold War has Russophobia been as much of a part of our daily lives as it is now. Disinformation, strong man tactics and a corrupt and dictatorial turn have spilled into American life in a way that would've seemed like fiction only a few decades ago. What was once the well-trodden territory of black and white "duck and cover" videos and 80s action flicks is now a staple of Twitter feeds and nightly news broadcasts.So how did we get here, and what the hell does Russia even want from us this time around? That's what Cracked's Robert Evans and Michael Swaim are here to find out on this week's podcast. They join Jack O'Brien for an all-encompassing conversation about the KGB's history of deceit, Russia's methodology for spreading lies and Vlad Putin's psych evaluation. Later in the show, Jack interviews Cracked engineer Tatiana Nam about her experiences growing up in Russia.Our next live podcast is on Saturday, February 11th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Just in time for Valentine's Day, join Jack O'Brien, Michael Swaim and Teresa Lee as they welcome Dr. Christopher Ryan, author of Sex at Dawn for a discussion about love, relationships and why our sex lives now bear no resemblance to the way our ancestors got down. Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/aXqXex Footnotes:Video: Cracked:  Why the #1 Fact of Military History is a Lie: https://goo.gl/12apTz Article: Cracked: 5 Conspiracy Theories That Are Real (But Not How You Think) [#5 CIA created AIDS]: https://goo.gl/wrt8Kk Article: Cracked: 6 Insane Conspiracy Theories That Actually Happened [#2 KGB Was Involved in JFK Assassination]: https://goo.gl/w4gBl Article: NPR: Putin 'Probably' Approved Plan to Kill Spy: https://goo.gl/cTC3h0 Podcast: NPR: Russia's Interference is an Assault on the Western Liberal Order: https://goo.gl/8FPDyv Video: Press Conference with Bill Clinton and Drunk Boris Yeltsin: https://goo.gl/aEcvkT Podcast: NPR: Trump Seems Willfully Blind to Putin's Real Goals: https://goo.gl/tIixW3 Book: Peter Pomerantsev: Nothing is True and Everything is Possible: https://goo.gl/UI1nNx This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED) and ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/cracked).

The Enormous Lie About Modern Life (You Likely Believe)  

Once you hit your mid-twenties, everything starts beginning to suck. Your favorite band? Not as good as when they first came out. Favorite hangouts? All gone to shit since all the young people started showing up and ruining everything. The world? Basically a day away from total anarchy.Even the idea of time begins to suck. The present is somehow always the worst and no matter how bad your life was 5, 10 years ago– it all seems tinted with rose-colored glasses. Sure you were bored all the time, had no way of communicating with people who weren't your neighbors and loved Hootie and the Blowfish, but man the 90s were the absolute peak of human existence, right? Not really.Somehow humans have this bias that makes them think the world is always at the brink of complete collapse and that things were better before...before AIDS and Ebola started killing everybody; before all the bees disappeared; before crime took over the streets, when you could leave your front door open all day and the criminals would tip their hats and say, "good morning!"We're here to say this way of thinking is wrong and completely ignores all of the amazing advancements humanity is continuing to make every day. It's just you don't hear about them because the headline "Cancer Deaths Slowly and Steadily Dropping" isn't as flashy as "IT'S ALL BURNING DOWN MAN, DON'T EVEN BOTHER!"On the podcast this week, Jack O'Brien is joined by Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) to talk about how we're neither going to hell nor are we in a hand basket. Poverty, war and disease are at all time lows, all you have to do is look away from the news to see it.Our next live podcast is on Saturday, February 11th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Just in time for Valentine's Day, join Jack O'Brien, Michael Swaim and Teresa Lee as they welcome Dr. Christopher Ryan, author of Sex at Dawn for a discussion about love, relationships and why our sex lives now bear no resemblance to the way our ancestors got down. Tickets are $7 and available here:  https://goo.gl/aXqXex Footnotes:Articles: Cracked: Pieces of Good News Nobody is Reporting:  https://goo.gl/ysKK7 https://goo.gl/8z04xT   https://goo.gl/Kr75IK Article: Biography.com: H.H. Holmes:  https://goo.gl/U1Bo6V Website: OurWorldInData.com:  https://goo.gl/afqC0a Graph: Innovation.org: Actual vs. Projected Death Rates for HIV/AIDS in the US:  https://goo.gl/ZI6zHY Article: Cracked: 5 Horrifying Apocalyptic Scenarios That Already Happened (#1 The Toba Event):  https://goo.gl/5COk09 Scholarly Article: British Journal of Preventative and Social Medicine: The Coal Gas Story:  https://goo.gl/EbJkvD Article: Bloomberg: Bias, Blindness and How We Truly Think:  https://goo.gl/98f6Uv Article: The New Yorker: Doomsday Prep for the Super Rich:  https://goo.gl/GBcpKk This episode is brought to you by Shari’s Berries (www.berries.com code: CRACKED) and Blue Apron (www.blueapron.com/cracked).

9 Creepy Real Murders (With My Favorite Murder)  

Remember when you made fun of that kid in grade school for wetting the bed? You probably shouldn't have done that. I would apologize, change your name or leave the country. The reason is, psychologists suggest something called the Macdonald triangle, that there are three main characteristics of people who grow up to become killers: arson, cruelty to animals and bed-wetting. If you've got two or more, (in Jeff Foxworthy's voice) chances are you might be a serial killer.So, for another round of creepy solved and unsolved murders, we've invited back to the podcast America's foremost experts on the subject, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark from 'My Favorite Murder'. They join Jack O'Brien and Daniel O'Brien to talk about Daniel's two hometown serial killers with a strange connection, two district attorneys who suffered mysterious ends, the unsolved murder of three girl scouts, and the murderer who buried his "kill kits" in the woods.Footnotes : My Favorite Murder:  https://goo.gl/gpaZN8 Article: Cracked: The 5 Most Terrifying Serial Killers You've Never Heard Of:  https://goo.gl/wh6B2U Murderpedia: Richard Biegenwald, "The Thrill Killer ":  https://goo.gl/2yq6l2 Murderpedia: Robert Zarinsky:  https://goo.gl/sM521t Documentary: Netflix: " Amanda Knox " :  https://goo.gl/y4LTOa Article: New York Times: For Letterman Stalker, Mental Illness Was Family Curse and Scarring Legacy:  https://goo.gl/tw4GQ6 Article: Washington Post: A Decade Later, Prosecutor Luna's Death Still a Mystery:  https://goo.gl/ydFmNI Article: CNN: What Happened to Ray Gricar?:  https://goo.gl/Jd3Qqy Book: Gloyd McCoy: Tent Number Eight:  https://goo.gl/wKUgTZ Murderpedia: Israel Keyes:  https://goo.gl/3t6NPG Documentary: HBO: There's Something Wrong With Aunt Diane:  https://goo.gl/2rjXqJ Article: ABC News: Murder of Jasmine Fiore by Ryan Jenkins:  https://goo.gl/rc0YyT Article: Today Costa Rica: Costa Rica Re-Opens Serial Killer Case):  https://goo.gl/iD2b0U

Accidents That Created The Best Art Of The 20th Century  

It's easy to think every piece of great art or unforgettable pop-culture is the result of effortless genius and precise intentionality. It separates the gods who create from us lay-people who like to eat cheese and can barely decide what to watch on Netflix. Take Spock's "Live Long and Prosper" hand signal. Yeah, it seems a little trivial, it's not 'Starry Night' or 'Hey Jude' or anything, but it's an icon that's lasted in the popular culture for 50 years and stands only second to "May the Force be with you" as the most recognizable totem of the sci-fi genre. Only a genius could've come up with that, right? Not really. Gene Roddenberry and company wanted the Vulcan salute to be the peace sign until Lenoard Nimoy took a stand for what was right and was like, "hey, this is dumb. I know this is coming from the dude wearing pointy ears right now, but can I just try this other thing so I don't look like the stupidest person on television?"And thank god Nimoy did that, because otherwise everyone would've thought 'Star Trek' was cheesy crap, or at least cheesier than it already was considered. So sometimes genius isn't in the intention as much as it is being able to realize a mistake, correct it and pray to god your new solution isn't as dull as the idea that preceded it. And pop culture is so littered with examples like these, there's a lone Native American man shedding a single tear over it. That much litter.So Jack O'Brien is joined on the podcast this week by Cracked's Teresa Lee and Alex Schmidt to talk about the behind the scenes mistakes and last-minute casting changes that made some movies and video games better. They also talk about some ghastly original versions of famous scripts that thankfully never saw the light of day. You don't want to know what the original description of Han Solo was (hint: it included the words "green" and "gills"). Footnotes:Article: Cracked: 5 Famous Roles Obviously Written For a Different Actor: https://goo.gl/PZD4Se Video: Cracked: 8 Times Your Favorite Actors Almost Died on Film: https://goo.gl/FTpSWN Article: Cracked: 5 Iconic Pop Culture Moments Improvised at the Last Second: https://goo.gl/5V8Tl Article: Cracked: 6 Glitches That Accidentally Invented Modern Gaming: https://goo.gl/WbOZ5 Article: Cracked: 6 Iconic Video Games That Were Created By Technical Problems: https://goo.gl/e2DBHN Article: Cracked: 7 Characters Clearly Designed for Different Famous Actors: https://goo.gl/nNrcJD Article: Cracked: 6 Iconic Movie Scenes That Happened By Accident: https://goo.gl/Q49cx Article: Cracked: 5 Amazing Performances From Actors Who Weren't Acting (Part I): https://goo.gl/W6KRf Article: Cracked: 6 Amazing Performances by Actors Who Weren't Acting (Part II): https://goo.gl/W6KRf Article: Cracked: 5 Amazing Performances by Actors Who Weren't Acting (Part III): https://goo.gl/R7Kebk Article: Cracked: 5 Amazing Performances by Actors Who Weren't Acting (Part IV): https://goo.gl/jNMCHl Article: Cracked: 5 Great Performances By Actors Who Weren't Acting (Part V): https://goo.gl/bLft7q Article: Cracked: 5 Actors Who Weren't Acting In Their Most Iconic Roles: https://goo.gl/kk5lV4 Article: Cracked: 6 Actors Who Thought They Had Made A Totally Different Movie: https://goo.gl/Wi6QWh Kyle Ayers' #RoofBreakup: https://goo.gl/KH3j3P Zach Broussard's Top 1000 Comedians: https://goo.gl/nKVn0r SoCal Comedy Fest: https://goo.gl/voRTUN This episode is brought to you by Squarespace and Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO.

160 Romantic Comedies: The Creepiest Movie Genre  

Think of every RomCom trope and the one thing that separates it from being in a horror movie instead: the music. It's all the same mad libs game, and the outcome is always the same.Colin Firth/Hugh Grant/Matthew McConaughey runs to the airport/apartment building/twee bakery to declare his undying love for the maid/undercover journalist/baker he just met last week. The music swells, they kiss, the girl's less attractive best friend sighs, "oh I wish architect/surgeon/astronaut Chet Wellington could fall in love with me," and the credits roll. But what if, instead of the swelling music, it was a single piano note being played backwards, or an old-timey phonograph blowing out a single child singing, "Ring Around the Rosie?" 'Love Actually' would turn into an actual horror movie. The little boy chasing the little girl through the airport would take on a new interpretation. 'Shining 2: This Time It's British Christmas."RomComs are weird like that. They take a thing most people experience (falling in love) and turn it into a warped version of reality that only abides by backwards rules: where chasing someone down is considered romantic and getting the person to like you is the hardest part, not that whole spending the next 5 decades together thing. No, that part is easy (cries self to sleep).So this week on the podcast, Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked editor Soren Bowie and comedian and writer Jamie Loftus from 'The Bechdel Cast' to talk about how RomComs get almost everything wrong and when you change just one detail, they become creepy stalker thrillers.Our next live podcast is on Saturday, January 14th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark from 'My Favorite Murder' are back for another hour of creepy unsolved murders and even creepier solved ones. Tickets are currently SOLD OUT but more will be released throughout the week  here:  https://goo.gl/5eew6F . If the show remains sold out, we will have a standby list at the door, so make sure to come early!Footnotes:Jamie Loftus on Twitter: https://goo.gl/5Jqr9m The Bechdel Cast on iTunes: https://goo.gl/9FkEzU Video: Cracked: The Only Film Genre That Gets You To Root For The Bad Guy: https://goo.gl/M3N8aW Video: Cracked: The 9 Creepiest Things Movies Portray As Romantic: https://goo.gl/Vwt9hy Video: Cracked: Why Romantic Comedies Are Secretly Bad For You: https://goo.gl/CeXsli Video: 'Love Actually' Cue Card Scene: https://goo.gl/WVkGGy Video: 'Trainwreck' Dance Scene: https://goo.gl/UtKVtQ Article: The Oxford Philosopher: The Birth of Tragedy: https://goo.gl/wZbVmF This episode is brought to you by Casper Mattresses ( www.casper.com/cracked ) and Blue Apron ( www.blueapron.com/cracked ).

The 80s: Our Most Bizarre Decade (Is Happening Again)  

Name the year: a new Star War is killing it at the box office, Russia and the US are having a staring contest and a madman driven by the power of celebrity is elected President. Yes, it's looking very much like we're living in the year 1980 right now and we want it to stop. I mean, if this is 1980, that means we're only three years away from more Ewoks. Although what is a Minion but yellow Ewok?But in all seriousness, the world has taken a turn for the conservative as it did in the early 80s. Free love and long hair were gone and replaced by shoulder pads, cocaine and rich white kids who thought the stock market was dope. So is there anything redeemable about this situation other than the prospect of getting some cool movies and punk music?Jack O'Brien and Daniel O'Brien are joined by comedian, podcast host and 'Saved by the Bell' historian April Richardson for a conversation about how 80s pop-culture perfectly represented those regressive times and how some of the patterns we saw then are starting to appear now in our modern pop-culture. They also talk about 'Saved by the Bell' a lot. Like, a whole bunch.Our next live podcast is on Saturday, January 14th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark from 'My Favorite Murder' are back for another hour of creepy unsolved murders and even creepier solved ones. Tickets are $7 and on sale  here: https:// goo.gl/5eew6F Footnotes:April Richardson: https://goo.gl/uPOCwn Go Bayside! Podcast: https://goo.gl/FuWvyL Article: Cracked: Why 'Saved by the Bell' is All a Dream: https://goo.gl/J9ujG Article: Cracked: 6 Ways You Didn't Realize Ronald Reagan Ruined the Country: https://goo.gl/55AJy2 Article: Cracked: 5 Baffling 80s Trends Explained by Rare Mental Disorders : https://goo.gl/XW6Y6 This episode is brought to you by Lifeafter podcast, Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED), and Harry’s.

The 25 Coolest Things We Discovered in 2016  

It's not just us right? There are too many damn movies and TV shows to keep up with. When we're not in the middle of a season of Game of Thrones, Westworld, Silicon Valley, Stranger Things, or House of Cards, there are always 40 other shows just waiting to get started. If only you were ready to make the commitment. Your girlfriend wants you to propose but you can't even commit to Six Feet Under, let alone the next 60 years of your life.This glut of TV shows we're experiencing completely fails to lack the steady stream of quality movies coming out not only in the US but all around the world. And the surplus of movies doesn't even address how behind you are on music. Open up Spotify or look at the next festival lineup and you can barely recognize a third of the bands there. And we're not being old fogies complaining about music these days-- most of these bands are good-- we just can't keep up with them. 21 Pilots, 21 Savage, 21 Scarecrows. Only one of those band names is completely made up.So to give a little order to this exponentially insane world, Jack O'Brien is joined by Cracked editors Soren Bowie and Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) to talk about some of their favorite they discovered in 2016. They commiserate about the superabundance of content and Soren gives some completely unsolicited home improvement advice.Our next live podcast is on Saturday, January 14th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark from 'My Favorite Murder' are back for another hour of creepy unsolved murders and even creepier solved ones. Tickets are $5 and on sale soon at sunset.ucbtheatre.com ( https://goo.gl/UNy5YF )Footnotes:Website: Pandora -- Search Standup:  https://goo.gl/tXZB Video: Youtube FanFest:  https://goo.gl/RhW2jK Netflix: John Mulaney: The Comeback Kid:  https://goo.gl/EPZMWF HBO: Pete Holmes: Faces and Sounds:  https://goo.gl/zIxXV4 Album: Kyle Kinane: Loose in Chicago:  https://goo.gl/UYTPsS Netflix: Michael Che Matters:  https://goo.gl/TiM4Jm Video: Dave Chappele SNL Monologue:  https://goo.gl/5D6dB0 Website: Nextdoor:  https://goo.gl/R1XSI Video: Red Letter Media: Wheel of the Worst #11:  https://goo.gl/zYUXeo YouTube: Jim Sterling:  https://goo.gl/r4SguC Wikipedia: Square Screws:  https://goo.gl/uGtgQY Amazon: Wet Vacuums: https://goo.gl/auLfij The Elf on the Shelf:  https://goo.gl/I9CJ0P Screenplay: Monsters, Inc:  https://goo.gl/71xVcx Video: Train to Busan (Trailer):  https://goo.gl/4Zbxfo Video: I Saw The Devil (Trailer):  https://goo.gl/6ojCqo Netflix: Amanda Knox:  https://goo.gl/y4LTOa Netflix: David Blaine: Real or Magic?:  https://goo.gl/olbb48 Netflix: Planet Earth:  https://goo.gl/vrZwiE Video: Bill Burr Makes a Pie Crust:  https://goo.gl/rJ5CV8 Netflix: F is for Family:  https://goo.gl/Cnokr6 Website: Stitcher:  https://goo.gl/R5h4rX Podcast: Science Vs:  https://goo.gl/Fa4g7D Podcast: Doughboys:  https://goo.gl/idq8zm Podcast: The Bill Simmons Podcast with Andy Cohen:  https://goo.gl/ok3LTs Video Game: The Last Guardian:  https://goo.gl/PTRsMj Video: Robyn "Call Your Girlfriend" on SNL:  https://goo.gl/CC2ozz Video: Chance the Rapper "Same Drugs" on SNL:  https://goo.gl/1TOJ3R This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CRACKED) and I.T. is Greater Than Sci-Fi podcast (www.vmware.com/radius/scifi)

0:00/0:00
Video player is in betaClose