The Crate and Crowbar

The Crate and Crowbar

United Kingdom

A PC gaming podcast.

Episodes

Episode 194: If All You Have Is A Bone Store, Every Problem Looks Like An Ossuary  

Pip, Tom, Chris and Tom discuss mod drama, patch note etiquette, Dead Cells, Tekken 7, Nex Machina, and Dota 2’s co-op update. Plus: mangled metaphor, the worst names for things, time management, allergies, and more. Apologies for the dip in sound quality this episode: as we explain at the beginning, Britain’s heat wave rendered our [...]

Episode 193: So Much For The Tolerant Elf  

Tom, Chris and Tom talk their way through a gigantic pile of E3 announcements, including expansions for Dishonored 2 and XCOM 2, Shadow of War, and assorted pirates. Plus loads more: see the show notes below for a full list of games and their associated trailers. Far Cry 5: footage and a very silly picture [...]

Episode 192: Ludomancers of Batman City  

Chris, Tom F and Alex discuss the future of XCOM 2, the history of Andromeda, Worlds Adrift, Dead Cells, Dawn of War III, Battlegrounds, and more. Plus: methods of movement, the Warcraft movie, micro but perhaps too much, secret pantalons. Here’s the teaser image for Firaxis’ to-be-announced XCOM 2 thing. Kotaku’s article about Mass Effect: [...]

Episode 191: Flamingos’ Uranium Legs  

Chris, Pip and the Toms cannot resist chiming in on Far Cry 5 one last time, but move swiftly on to Tom S’s impressions of Destiny 2 on PC, Tom F’s of Caveblazers and Legacy of the Void, and Chris and Pip’s differing feelings on the much-changed Dota 2. We hadn’t seen the actual trailer [...]

Prey: A Lock-In at The Crate and Crowbar  

Just in time for the weekend! Chris, Tom F and John R discuss the successes and failings of Arkane’s beautifully-designed sci-fi horror being-a-cup simulator. Needless to say, this one-off special episode is completely rammed with spoilers from the outset. If you haven’t played Prey all the way through to the end – and past the [...]

Episode 190: You Can Extrude A Beard  

Chris, Tom F and Tokyo 42 creators Sean and Maciek discuss Tokyo 42, game secrets, Far Cry 5, Offworld Trading Company, Forts, Edith Finch and loads more. As is said at the beginning of this episode, we hit our first serious technical problems while recording this week. As such there are a few gaps and [...]

Episode 189: And You Can Have The Hated Holiday Elf  

Chris, Tom F, Pip and a deck of Lego cards discuss Hanano, puzzle game design, Endless Space 2, pre-pre-E3 news, and more. Plus: a bumper helping of grudges, Chris’ flimsy manifesto, the fallacy of rock-paper-scissors, the duality of Linux as both man and penguin. In which Ubisoft announce a series of logos, some of which [...]

Episode 188: West, Aft, South And Down  

Chris, Tom F, Tom S, and bonus Pip discuss Prey! Lots of Prey. Lots o’ Prey. Also: Risk of Rain, Assassin’s Creed and Far Cry rumours, gimbal lock, and fascinating regional WASD. Give that toaster an extension cable. Hopoo Games’ Risk of Rain 2 translates a 2D roguelike to all three dimensions. Assassin’s Creed: Origins. [...]

Episode 187: The Contenxt of Bundvr Chegg  

Chris, Tom F, Alex and a modicum of Pip discuss Prey, Exo One, Dawn of War III, and What Remains of Edith Finch. Two hours of actual podcast: one bonus hour that we will never speak of again. Also: increasingly poor startup pitches, missing swans, goblins, pro StarCraft, walking simulator naming conventions, too much rum, [...]

Episode 186: Big Crab Claw, Little Crab Claw, Cardboard Box  

Chris, Tom S and Tom F discuss Phoenix Point, Vanquish, N++, The Signal From Tolva, Elite Dangerous and more. Then: a wild Pip appears? Plus: Destiny on PC! Dice in the wrong places! Penguins! Games on laptops! Plugs! Lambrini! Buckets! Ending! Every! Word! With! An! Exclamation! Mark! Phoenix Point is Julian Gollop’s new game, or [...]

Episode 185: In The Passion Pond At Red Tide  

Chris, Tom, Pip and returning guest Tim Wicksteed discuss Megaquarium, Golf For Workgroups, Battlefront 2 and much more. Plus: returning to Hearthstone, a little Dota 2, Unexplored, Loot Rascals, Hackmud, and your questions. Tim’s game is Megaquarium. It’s about a mega aquarium. His previous game was Big Pharma. It’s not about a big farmer. Behond [...]

Episode 184: RANK0 The Robert  

Chris and a full complement of Toms discuss new developments in Overwatch and Minecraft as well as Bayonetta, The Signal From Tolva, and a little bit of Mass Effect: Andromeda. Plus: stealin’ guys, the death of Eggman, moon resistance, poor broccoli timing, robot road manners, game dreams, the Andromeda question, and rum. And wine. Tom’s [...]

Episode 183: Dogs Have No Answer  

Live at Rezzed 2017! Pip, Chris and Graham talk about the games they’ve seen and played at the show and then field questions from REAL PEOPLE. There are some audio issues with this episode due to the unavoidable consequences of trying to get three allegedly-competent people to speak to both each other and a handheld [...]

Episode 182: An Enduring Wahey  

Chris and Alex talk Destiny 2, Night in the Woods, Stories Untold, and pioneer a predominantly grunt-based review scale. Also: game soundtracks, people-as-limited-content-nodes, sports (?!), lore and the nice robots. Eight-hundred-and-twenty! It’s a four pod week! In addition to today’s live show at EGX Rezzed, you can check out episode two of Chris and Tom’s [...]

Horizon Zero Dawn: A Lock-In at The Crate and Crowbar  

A little bonus pod for you this week: Tom F dials in from Seattle with an hour of his thoughts on free-roaming robot dinosaur adventure Horizon: Zero Dawn. Tom will be returning to the podcast proper very soon. You can listen to this episode on YouTube, if you prefer. Music, as ever, is from Clambake [...]

Episode 181: Bros Before Bows  

WALLOPING HOWDY and welcome to episode 181, in which Pip, Chris and Tom S gather to very carefully not spoil Mass Effect: Andromeda, Future Unfolding and Nier: Automata. THEN, questions! What would truly advanced AI do to games? Football clubs running esports teams? Best cats in games? What is co-op? Plus, another grudge! Keep ‘em [...]

Episode 180: ‘Til I See Marianne Despawn  

Pip, Tom and Chris discuss Dawn of War III, No Man’s Sky, Mass Effect: Andromeda and other space things besides. Plus: things that are more than a feeling, the joy of jumping, delicious salt, the golden frog of shoes, and our most joyous walloping howdies. Also, Pip remembers some lore. We’re doing a live show [...]

Episode 179: Tom Clancy’s Club Penguin  

Chris, Pip and Alex recap GDC, find various uses for a Steam Link and double-tap Ghost Recon: Wildlands. Plus! Our favourite history podcasts, goat-bonking Bloodbowl 2 action, the world circa 2003 and 2016 and the question of whether Ed Sheeran looks like all games journalists or whether all games journalists look like Ed Sheeran. Goats [...]

Episode 178: We Don’t Make The Rules In The Void  

Chris and Tom’s timelines converge for a chat about open-world design in Sniper Elite 4 and a deep-dive into Torment: Tides of Numenera. Plus, we’ve got some exciting podcast news to share! Any spatial, temporal or causal anomalies encountered while listening to this week’s episode are not the responsibility of The Crate and Crowbt̶i̴m̴e̷l̵i̶n̶e̴c̴o̴l̸l̴a̶p̶s̷e̷t̴i̵m̶e̶l̴i̵n̶e̸c̶o̷l̶l̸a̶p̴s̴e̵t̵i̷m̶e̸l̷i̸n̸e̸c̴o̸l̶l̴a̸p̷ṡ̷͖̠͙͓̓͒̚e̴̡̥̺̐ṫ̵̮͖͗i̷̧͆͝m̸̬̯̗̎͆̌͝ȩ̸̘͍͒l̵͓̝̄̋̑̌͜i̷̟͊͠ñ̷̥̈́̿̈ë̸̝̤͇̳́͑̋c̸̡̞͌͠ǫ̸̫͔̹́̓l̵̨͚̝̜̒̀́l̸̛̫̇̂́a̸̫̽́̓̇p̴̗͑̅̈́s̶͎̊́̚é̴̛͙͙t̸͍̤͗i̴̹͉̩͇͌̈́͂́m̸̯͌̈́e̵͕̦͛́l̴̡̓̄́i̷̠̓̂̇n̵̫̉͒̊̆e̶̛̮̎̈́͌c̶͕̺̹̓o̵̳͙͊̂͗͝l̶̩͍͍͒l̶͈̜͓̀̀̿a̵̡̪̙̐̓ͅp̵̡̮̪̝̌̄̚s̸̻͕̀̌̋͝e̸̦̗͓̽͝t̶͔̼͈̙͊ỉ̷̡͘m̶̧̤̯̀̽́͜ȩ̸̃̐ĺ̵̟̼̘̞̅i̸͙̙̟̫͆̑̕n̴͖͂͊e̷̟̹͍̣̐c̷̮͇̓̔̓͜ơ̵̛̪̞̲͍͙̬̊̐̀́͂͒̎͠͝n̴̛̛͔̻̼̪̤͈̳̗͇̭̳̪̞̖̬͌̓̈́̽̾̂͗̌̾̎͂̚͘͝͝v̷̧̡̡̦͓̰͓̖̹̝̼̥̞̖̠̙͇͎̅̍͒̋̀͋̄͠ͅȩ̸̢̢̺͓͖̥̹̩̼̲͕̘̯̤͈̜͖͔̺̩͋̎̌͊͋̾͋͂̄̽r̸̡̧̨͎̭̖͍̦̹͉̟̘̬̠̺͙̼͉͕̣̹̺̟͑̄̑̈́̆̓̑̄͗̀͆̓̎̆̀̊̍͑̎̕͠ǵ̶̢̨͔̜̘̥̹̬͍͉̦̬͓͚̘͔̻͈̎̈́͑̒̊͑̌͌̃͝ͅḛ̴̡̭͎͍̙͍̭̘̺̗̣͉̺̳̙̜̙́̆͒̋́̇̔̈́ņ̶̛͈̘̭̹̗͖̝̜̭̲͈͙͙̮̠͕̼̬̦̹͗͒̅̾̓͗͜c̸̭̣̭͉̫͔̻͇̫̳̲͋̈́̈́͋̈͘͜e̵̡̜͕̮͙̟̗̻̩̦͖̟͉̤͐͑̊̈́̅͌͠ç̶̡̗͚̣̪̗̰̲͍͚̦͍̤̜̫̩̱͓͆̄̒̎̿̑̔̈̃̓̉͂͐̓͒͂̎̍̓̂̄̍͝͝ͅǫ̶͔̜̩̯̼̿̚ņ̵͈̺̪̥͈̫̥̺̄̈͒̉͐͐ͅv̸̖͎̻̥̦͕͎̝̙̲̥͙͙̄́̈́̆̚ȇ̸̻͕͓͕̪̱͙͛͛̽̍̆̂̐̋́̏̈̈͘r̴̡̡̧̡̬̫̼̟̩͇̼̟̱̺̺̘̲͙̠̲͉͒̐̄͛̏̐͌̋̑̔̀̍̌͛͛̇̿̈̚̕̚͝g̶̖͇̥̔̊͛͊̂͝ͅë̴̢̥͎͇̰̰̤̥̤̘̦̪̝̦̯̠̮́͛̆̎̌̑̍̀͑̐͑͘̚͜n̶̢̨̨̛̺͉̰͙̺̮̳̣̬̎͑̉̄̄͌̉̚̕c̷̛̺̞̘̘̳̽̾́́͆͊̌̈́͂̓̃̏́̋̓̀̓̓̿̀̌̏̂͝e̵̘̬͙̣͙͆̌͛̄͊̿́̇̔̔̐̌͆̂̅̔̐̽̈̀́͘̕͠c̸̢̨̜̳͙̪̗͎̮͇̙̬͔̫̖̥̊̔̾̈̑̈́̏̐̓̆̀̀͐͌͘̕o̷̢͎̼̲̪͈̟̤͉͖̼͕͈͔̘͎̬̗̰͕̺̲͈̙͑́̽̎͗͆̃̏͘̚n̸͓͕̯̥̖̗̯͎͒̓̄̾̉̈̌v̶̨̢̛̺͔̜͙̹͔̪̖͍̋͛̀͆̀̾͌́́̂̿͛̽͠ę̷̢̨͖̝̰̙̬͔͓̙̳͈͔̏́̀͊̀̌̓̄́̾̓̎̅͊͗͋̈́̈́́̏̏͘̚͜͝͠r̸̡̨͉̞̝̤͔̠͔̘̭͚̼͙̹̯̯̱͎͙̠̰̉͊̀͂̎̑̃̐́̎̀̎͜͝ͅg̵̢͚̮̅͐̃͑̚͠e̷̢̛̛̬̝͂̏̿͒̈̕͜n̶̲̬̱̦̗̯̣͕̺̱̝̩̦̺̤͕̰̯̳̲̖̯̂̇͌̾͝ç̵̰̮̺̹̝͉̪̪̗̻̪̖̼̏̀́̈̏̕͝ẻ̴̡̡̢̡̹̳̬̭̖͓͕̦̪̲̼͔̣̲̠̠͆͑̂͊̉̀̀̅̀̔̈́̔͋͂̃̑̏͌͆͊̇̓͜͜͜ͅͅc̵̨̮͓͍̤̆́̚ǫ̸̳͓͙͙̥͍̘̤̞̣̰̀̆̆̊́̒̈́̈́̐̇̾́͑͌n̶̯̯̩̙͍̼̦͕̓̃̔̏́̈́͗̅̂̈́̌̀̈̈̀̾̾́̈́̋͛́̕v̶̧̡̬̞̯̘̭̣̐̏̄̒̐̑͘͝e̸̗͈̪̱̮̺͇̋͗̽̇̂̈́r̵̨̢̩̱͉͖͇̰̞̱̰̦̼͖̮͔̲̦̉͛̊̂̀̾̈́̋̉͑̑̿́͜͝g̵̢̨̛̛̗̠͉̬̲̦̹̬̭͐̅͋̏̇̊̌͛͜͝e̴̡͖͗̈́̃̊͌̌̐͝n̴̡̨͎̣͖̝̫̤͍̻̻̯̤̦̮͍̫̩̠̱̲̐̐̿͂̇̄̂́̇̀̈́̍̔̕͘͜͝c̷͍̥͓̰̙̑͗͗̔͂͋̿͛̋̍̓̈́͐̇̄̄̋͠͝͝ē̵̛͉̙̎̾̊͆̌͛̕͜ The [...]

Miniatures Monthly 001: Tiny Plastic People  

In this debut episode of the Crate and Crowbar’s spinoff miniatures podcast, Chris and Tom discuss Age of Sigmar and how they returned to hobby gaming. We talk about what we’ve found valuable about building and painting tiny plastic people, the background to Age of Sigmar and our armies, and what we’ve enjoyed about telling [...]

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