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In this episode, I again speak to the Superintendent of Mission Public Schools to get some answers about what back to school will look like for students across grade levels. Mostly this episode is intended to help parents who are still trying to decide whether or not to send their children back to in-class instruction or whether another option is the correct choice for their family at this time. The different options (regular school placement, distributed learning and home schooling) are defined, discusses and weighed out a little with pros and cons. We discuss the learning groups (cohorts, bubbles whatever you're calling it!) and what function they truly serve. If you want to know why the high school is in-class one day a week and why it isn't your youngest children that you should be the most worried about then listen now! We even discuss teachers in the 1900s hint: just like you CANNOT show up to school with the sniffles today, you didn't want to show up with dirty fingernails back then!
Here is the link to the study of COID-19 in schools in Australia that we discussed-they have their Term 2 study up now too. The main point is that unlike the flu, COVID-19 transmission in schools is quite rare and children are not the primary part of the population who are passing this virus around: http://ncirs.org.au/sites/default/files/2020-04/NCIRS%20NSW%20Schools%20COVID_Summary_FINAL%20public_26%20April%202020.pdf
The following link is to an article written by 2 paediatricians who say their main goal is to protect children with science the end of the article states: "we have five studies assessing the secondary attack rate of COVID-19 across age groups, in which four report a considerably lower attack rate in children and one which reports the same in children as the general population. It appears fairly convincing that children are less likely to acquire the infection than adults, by a significant amount." https://dontforgetthebubbles.com/the-missing-link-children-and-transmission-of-sars-cov-2/ If Mission is your local school district you can find up to date information on their website: www.mpsd.ca
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As British Columbia prepares to open schools to part-time, in class learning, I speak to the Superintendent of Mission Public Schools about sending children back to school. If you are wondering what school might look like while there is no vaccine for the Coronavirus or cure for COVID-19, then this is the episode for you! We chat about ALL THE THINGS: the fear, the playground, the research-based evidence, the misunderstandings, the disadvantaged children who don’t have access to laptops and wifi and the “why now?” and “why bother?” questions SO many parents have been asking. Near the end, Mr. Wilson shares about a family with immune compromised children who ARE choosing to send their children and what they said when asked if they were sure about their decision. The information in this episode is specific to British Columbia, Canada (and mostly about the Mission school district) and the research discussed was correct and current on May 22, 2020. I hope it helps in your decision making now OR for September because this virus has not disappeared. I hope it makes you smile especially the recording of my 4 year old at the end-clearly I only snuggle him some days and not all lol!
Here is the link to the study of COID-19 in schools in Australia that we discussed and has the infographic we spoke about. The main point is that unlike the flu, COVID-19 transmission in schools is quite rare and children are not the primary part of the population who are passing this virus around:
http://ncirs.org.au/sites/default/files/2020-04/NCIRS%20NSW%20Schools%20COVID_Summary_FINAL%20public_26%20April%202020.pdf
The following link is to an article written by 2 pediatricians who say their main goal is to protect children with science the end of the article states: "we have five studies assessing the secondary attack rate of COVID-19 across age groups, in which four report a considerably lower attack rate in children and one which reports the same in children as the general population. It appears fairly convincing that children are less likely to acquire the infection than adults, by a significant amount." https://dontforgetthebubbles.com/the-missing-link-children-and-transmission-of-sars-cov-2/
If Mission is your local school district you can find up to date information on their website: www.mpsd.ca
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We all have feelings and we're going to have them forever. If you would like to learn a couple of ways to calm your children after a tantrum this is the episode for you! I walk you through the idea of a "calm down basket" and give you the steps in teaching children about their emotions. They honestly do not know what is happening to them or how to come down from it when they are having big feelings. We can name their feelings, discuss where and how they feel emotions in their body and guide them towards being able to tell us how they are feeling and why.
This is a stressful time. NEVER before in my lifetime has the entire world had so many BIG feelings all at the same time! Also, (as if that wasn't enough to deal with), a lot of us are staying at home, not seeing friends and family, and not able to attend appointments that usually keep us feeling well and balanced. The RAIN technique that I learned through Tara Brach's book and podcasts has helped me and could help your older children (and you) too!
Calm Down Basket ideas Pinterest Board: https://pin.it/14V6pWM
Calm Down Basket demonstration and tips: https://youtu.be/zIfLUcWJglk
Calm Down Basket Title: https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Product/Calm-Down-Kit-2623170
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During this unknown time, it's normal for kids to be extra worried, fearful, clingy, overly emotional and a bunch of other big emotions...on this episode I discuss the virus, prevention, how it spreads and how you can talk to your children about this upside down world we are living in where their parents work from home, they can't play with their friends, they can't hug their grandparents and schools have been shutdown until further notice.
Here are the websites mentioned in this episode and a new self assessment tool that was just launched in BC
How to talk to children about Coronavirus -one page from the Fred Rogers Centre https://www.fredrogerscenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/FRC-COVID19-Response.pdf
The information I quoted is from the BC Centre for Disease Control and your country/state/province's healthcare website continues to be the best place to go for information. There is a LOT of misinformation out on social media right now.
http://covid-19.bccdc.ca/
The self-assessment quiz on the BCCDC website is easy to use and will tell you exactly how much or little you should be distancing or isolating yourself right now, if you develop symptoms, if you find out someone you were in contact with tested positive for Coronavirus or has symptoms and if you were out of the country.
I also found this short 23 minute podcast helpful:
"The 'Telus Talks Health’ podcast is hosted by veteran broadcaster Tamara Taggart and will air twice weekly. In the show’s inaugural episode, Taggart is joined by Telus chief neuroscience officer Dr. Diane McIntosh, who gives advice on how Canadians can manage their physical and mental health during the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. Some of the topics discussed include social distancing, how to stay calm, what to do to stay physically healthy and how to take care of mental health." (from https://mobilesyrup.com/2020/03/17/telus-health-podcast-coronavirus/ article)
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In this episode, I share my personal experience of moving through grief once having children and how I handled sharing information with them. This episode was actually recorded in August, (long before my chat with Mitch McCormick in Episode 17 - Grief Guidance), but after speaking with him it feels like the right time to share this too. I hope you find some of it helpful, even if only because you know someone else is or has gone through the same things and found it just as hard as you do.
Episode Notes:
Here is the link the other episode on moving through grief with children:
https://anchor.fm/charlene-nicole/episodes/17---Grief-Guidance-GUEST-Mitch-McCormick-eaih3q
If you need support please reach out:
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/coping-with-grief-and-loss.htm
If you would like more information on helping a friend or loved one who is grieving here is an article that I found helpful:
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/helping-someone-who-is-grieving.htm
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This episode is all about grief, loss and mostly about explaining death to children. I was moved by my friend's elegy for his mother so much so that I asked him to be on the podcast to share it. I love the amazing way he explained death to his young children and I think you will too! My guest is Mitch McCormick, a long time friend, engaging story-teller and father of 2 young children.
He lost his mother suddenly and when she was much too young-as she was JUST starting to enjoy her retirement as a matter of fact...Mitch shares the story of how his mother died and some very important information about heart attack symptoms in women as opposed to men. He tells how he feels the medical system was set up by and for men and so isn't serving women like it could or should. (See the links below)
We discuss moving through grief with and after having children as I lost my uncle around the same time. Death is a fact of life and I believe it isn't something we should hide from children. They need to see us happy, sad, joyful and full of sorrow to understand that these feelings are normal and happen to everyone. Mitch and I discuss how he handled this sudden and shocking news and warning: it (understandably) gets a bit emotional and teary at parts!
I hope this episode helps take away some of the fear you may have around discussing death with your children and gives you some tools to help you move through your own feelings as well. I love the way that Mitch’s explanation to his children allows them to experience joy when they think of their grandmother instead of just sadness and tells them where to go for comfort or to find love: “whenever you want to see or feel her light you just need to look at Uncle Shane smile or watch Uncle Scotty laugh or share a big hug with Grandpa and you will feel her love all around you”
Episode Notes:
Click here https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/warning-signs-of-a-heart-attack/heart-attack-symptoms-in-women for Heart attack symptoms in Women that Mitch talks about. His mom seemed to be experiencing extreme lethargy/tiredness and flu-like symptoms before her death as is mentioned in this article!
Mitch discussed with me the differences in how men and women may experience a heart attack and told me about how the healthcare system treats men and women differently. If you would like to learn more about that, The Guardian wrote an article that explains some of the history that may be behind the different care that men and women receive when they go to the doctor. "The Healthcare Gender Bias: do men get better medical treatment?" is the name of the article. https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/nov/20/healthcare-gender-bias-women-pain
This PDF helped me when my uncle died. It's about how children understand grief and how the adults in their life can help them. It's called "How Children Grieve" https://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-and-policy/aap-health-initiatives/Children-and-Disasters/Documents/After-a-Loved-One-Dies-English.pdf
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The joys of travelling with children are discussed on this episode! The most difficult age to travel with a child, what to pack, tricks to help your child sleep on vacation, preparing for the unexpected, and how many diapers to pack for the plane! I talk with Erin and Craig who took their Adventure Baby to Australia and New Zealand for TWO MONTHS when she was 3.5-5.5 months old, Japan, Quebec and MANY more. They have a blog that details all of their travels and is organized by age of their Adventure Baby and by places they’ve travelled (before and after baby). It explains thoroughly what you will need and gives many tips and tricks for different ages of children you may be travelling with.
In this episode Craig and Erin share some top tips that have carried them through travels with their child at every stage such as: honouring the child's sleep schedule, packing your laundry detergent from home, using a video monitor, things you should think about before choosing where to stay and how carrying toys you don't let your child play with for most of the trip can be a life saver!
Their website is www.highfiveadventures.com and it is organized by both AGE of child you are travelling with AND by the PLACES in the world they have travelled. Check it out before your next plane, train, bus or car trip!
We also discuss when their Adventure Baby was at what they found to be the most difficult age to travel with (hint: it's in the TODDLER years!) and things you can do beforehand to prepare your child for what they will see and do while travelling.
Here are some links of things we discussed during the episode:
You Tube Video of what to expect when going through airport security. https://youtu.be/IHjlN5lzCjM
Pinterest Board of crafts and pictures of inside an airplane to show children (when the seatbelt light is on you must be sitting!) https://www.pinterest.ca/playfuljoy/before-you-fly-with-kids/
Books: Too Much Stuff by Robert Munsch, Hello Airplane by Martha Zschock
Thanks for Listening!
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On January 1, 2020 I recorded in my car because this hit me and I HAD to share. It’s less than 10 minutes, but I really think this idea could change your relationship with your child forever-in an amazingly positive way. I hope you love it!! Note: the statement I shared with my kids is not my own idea...I read it in an article on Facebook and for the LIFE of me, I cannot find it again...if you know whose idea this is/was please email me so that I can give them credit [email protected]
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Probably shouldn't listen WITH your children...ask for headphones for Christmas so you can listen while you cook, wrap, drive, bake, eat or while you do anything:)
I first share where I've been and what I have been doing on this accidental 3 month hiatus...and then...talk about how it's almost that time!!! Christmas and the holiday season is such a fun time for children and parents and many people love it. It's also okay if you don't love it!
On this episode, I share some of the things that I would have liked to hear during my first Christmases as a parent...some of the mistakes I made in over doing it, or putting my energy and attention into things that I now wouldn't bother with. At the end, I give some of my tools for remaining the parent I want to be during this time of year (or any extra busy or stressful time, really). If you like mindfulness you will like this part:) I also share some of my mediocre, but enough ideas for that damn elf on the shelf ;)
Here are some better ideas than mine if you are interested:
https://askannamoseley.com/2014/11/24-easy-elf-on-the-shelf-ideas/ -
Lexa Bergen is the guest this week! She is an amazing photographer, mother of two and simply a very interesting person to talk to! We connected when she asked me about starting a podcast and our conversation quickly turned to the topic of diversity - how people in the community talk to, look at, connect with and treat people who are different from themselves. (Hint: the golden rule your Grandma taught you is probably all anyone needs). Lexa has a son with special needs so we chat about our gratitude for the medical system in Canada (my oldest has had 2 fairly major surgeries and Lexa and I have both been in and out of Children's Hospital with our kids). This episode is about how we can see our children for their abilities FIRST and then encourage other people (teachers, friends, strangers) to do the same. We talk teachers and school and Lexa shares her vision of what she would like inclusion to look like. We discuss what we learn as adults when we take a moment to view life from our children's pure, unbiased, open and loving perspectives. Also, how allowing your child to see you doing things you love encourages them to do the same-to find something they are passionate about and go for it! AND THEN Lexa tells the story about when her son read the word fuck at 6 years old-it's hilarious!
Episode Notes:
After the episode, (in case it isn't clear in our conversation), we came up with these ways that you can help your child to speak to anyone who is different from them or someone they are curious about.
****treat them as you would anyone else (the Golden Rule :o) i.e. do not speak in an overly excited or upbeat voice because the child has special needs. We can all speak to every 6-year-old in the same manner/tone/voice no matter what their physical appearance or abilities are Allow those around that child (parent, Educational Assistant, child care worker etc.) to step in and help them understand/respond if they need it.
****if you have a question, ask the child -don't assume they cannot understand or answer you. This is where we can help our children learn what they CAN do instead of simply staring or asking us (the parent) what they are curious about. If they say to you "why can't that person just walk, why do they need a wheelchair?" encourage them to ask that person with your help of course!
****A good way to begin these types of questions is with "I'm curious about ________."
Hope this helps you navigate raising children who remain curious, but are also polite about it - in true Canadian style!!
Lexa's SHE Project is "a project that celebrates you and connects us all." It is an amazing work of art that I hope to be a part of one day. She photographs women outside in nature and brings out their beauty in unexpected and wonderful ways. I personally love her use of water in some of the images-those ones are my favourite!
Website: www.lexasperspective.ca
Instagram: @lexasphoto @lexasshe
Email: [email protected] -
This down-to-earth chat with the amazing and refreshing Samantha Strange is ALL about sexual health. We laugh about parents trying to get privacy in the bathroom, "nocturnal emissions", getting "kicked in the balls", the unrealistic aspects of porn and SO much more. She gives wonderful advice about starting the conversation, the words to use, keeping it positive and giving accurate information. This episode is meant to help you understand a little bit about: what is taught in the BC school curriculum and when to have discussions, how to speak to your children about their body parts, body changes, conception, birth, sex etc. This episode is meant for parents to listen to it is not a chat given in a developmental appropriate way for children to listen to. I love that Sam is working to remove shame and build compassion by helping everyone of all sexes and genders understand about each other in every way.
www.Samanthastrange.com Instagram: @sexualhealthwithsam Facebook page: search "nothing strange about it"
Episode Notes and Resources:
It is easier to begin talking about sexual health at a young age and in a way that is organic. Remove the shame and weirdness by talking about it in a way that simply gives information.
In the British Columbia school curriculum the general topic in Kindergarten to grade 3 is body science-anatomical names for body parts, consent (hugs, high-five OR a wave to say goodbye). In grade 4 and 5 topics of puberty, attraction, self-identity, body image, gender and social marketing can be taught/discussed.
Samantha gives a wonderful approach which you can hear explained in detail in the episode, but here is a breakdown of how to begin: 1. anatomical terms for body parts 2. Check school curriculum for developmentally appropriate topics and to build on what your child is learning at school 3. Discuss puberty/body changes and sex on the internet (porn) before grade 4 3. Know your child and how they learn. Access resources to learn together about questions you may not know the answer to or that you are unsure HOW to answer in a way that is appropriate for your child's age.
Here are some resources that we discussed:
https://www.optionsforsexualhealth.org
1-800-SEX-SENSE M-F 9am-9pm
https://kidshelpphone.ca/
1-800-668-6868.
https://curriculum.gov.bc.ca/ -
A speech by Matthew McConaughey is the inspiration for this episode. He talks about the difference between happiness and joy and I think the distinction is worth noting since this podcast is about finding the joy in parenting! His speech is also worth the listen. It is called "Matthew McConaughey - This Is Why You're Not Happy One Of The Most Eye Opening Speeches" and you can find it on YouTube here:
https://youtu.be/p0p1fjLPjYQ
After his quotes, I talk about HOW we can pinpoint what brings us joy, how that is different for every parent and how you can find your 'sweet spot' as a parent. Thanks for listening! If you love it please share the name of the podcast with a friend and subscribe, rate and review wherever you listen. You can connect with me in one of these ways:
email: [email protected]
Instagram: @playfuljoypodcast
Facebook Page: Charlene Nicole
Twitter: @playfulpod -
A short chat about a win I had this week in the parenting arena. The little things we do everyday with good intentions and that are centred around the kind of parent we want to be really do add up...we can change a relationship, build attachment, create a safe space or create whatever we want for and with our children...EVEN while we are making mistakes and might be feeling like we're failing everyday, every week or every hour. It's not the mistakes that matter it's the recovery-the trying again tomorrow. Also, my child licked the pavement so much as I spoke to a friend at sports day today that there was a HUGE wet spot on the ground where he had been licking...wtf?! Maybe I need to feed this kid more?
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"Is it possible that we all feel like failures [as parents] because we have the wrong job description?" - Glennon Doyle Melton. This episode is about How I came to remember that it is important to let children feel their pain and work through it. And how I was reminded (again) to let go of guilt and just be there for my children in a slightly scary situation...then I got to watch as they both were brave and helpful and there for each other. Some of this we all already knew - we can't save our children from every ounce of pain they might experience. What we may not have realized: those exact same pains they will experience (that will be gut wrenching for us to watch them go through, and would sometimes be quite easy for us to fix or figure out FOR them), are EXACTLY the experiences that will shape them. If we want strong, persistent, resilient, problem-solving children then we have to let them feel the pains of life. I'll let you listen to figure out how the poop part plays a role in my having arrived at these conclusions.
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This episode is about all things Kindergarten! Starting school expectations, reading readiness, end of the year craziness, separation anxiety, mental health days (yes, 5-year-olds need them too!) and different teaching styles all come up in our conversation. Kayla Kiselich runs an in-home daycare and has her Early Childhood Education Certificate just like me:) We love chatting about our children and child development and hope you like listening! PLEASE subscribe and rate on Apple podcasts or wherever you listen!
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Just a short, funny, relatable analogy to what it is like being with young children ALL day...or even for a short time for that matter! The demands being placed on our minds and bodies every day when working with children REQUIRES that we take breaks, ask for help, practice self care, do things we love and check in with people who support and love us!!! Hang in there everyone it’s going to be a great weekend, but it’s also going to have WTF moments too :) Listen to the episode with Catherine Roscoe Barr for more tips on taking care of yourself!
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Kara Coleman is the guest this week! She is both the visionary behind Parallel Yoga in Abbotsford, BC and a certified yoga instructor. She is a mother of 3 and has created a space that is exactly what she wanted it to be “Authentic. Safe. Home.” and when speaking to Kara one feels safe and cared about-just like everyone should at home. Kara discovered yoga in her early years as a mother and tells us how attending classes turned into building and running her own studio! We talk teenagers-she has them and I’m scared to have them-organized sports, yoga, volunteering, conscious involvement in kids’ lives vs. busy just to be busy and SO much more. You can find the studio and a schedule of classes at www.parallelyoga.ca You can follow the studio on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram @ParallelYoga Please let me know what you think of this episode on Instagram @playfuljoypodcast or by email [email protected] Thank you for listening!
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Tamara Taggart is the guest this week! She is the Liberal Party of Canada’s candidate for Vancouver Kingsway, a mother of 3, a veteran Canadian broadcaster, an advocate, a Vancouverite and simply a down-to-earth woman who tells it like it is. Tamara and I chat about how we think parenting has changed over the past few generations, how we can find balance and ask for help, what happens when we are overwhelmed or exhausted and what it means to parent past ourselves and accept our children exactly as they are. At the end of the episode, we share things we never thought we’d say as mothers.
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Catherine Roscoe Barr is the guest this week! With a Bachelor of Science degree in neuroscience and 18 years as a wellness professional – certified as a personal trainer, fitness instructor, older adult specialist and coach practitioner – Catherine is regularly featured on blogs, TV shows, podcasts and radio programs for her expert opinion on mental, physical and spiritual health. On this episode we talk personal growth, sleep deprivation, fitting in physical activity while raising children, vaginas after child birth, following your intuition, self-love AND how saying “parenting is hard” doesn’t even begin to describe how difficult parenting really is. We also mention: Brene Brown, Oprah’s Super Soul Conversations (Podcast) with Shawn Achor, Yung Pueblo, Emelia Symington Fedy, and SO much more!! More links on IG @playfuljoypodcast Keep the emails coming! Questions, comments and funny anecdotes-I want to hear them all! [email protected]
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This is a quick chat about what this podcast is about and why I’m making it. It is inspired by quotes from Catherine Roscoe Barr and Glennon Doyle Melton who both in their own ways reminded me to just keep publishing episodes, keep making mistakes and learning, keep showing up as my true imperfect self who is here to help. Thanks for listening!
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