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This is our sixteenth year of marriage, my husband and I. And some days, some months, some weeks, it seems like we're just going through motions, and I wonder... Don't we love each other anymore? But it's ridiculous! I do know that we love each other. I suppose that all marriages go through some blah periods, but we do love each other. I can't imagine my life without him.
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When I was a teen, I always asked my grandmother, "How do you know when you meet the one?" Her answer was always, "You'll know when it happens." She was right! I fell in love with Michael at first sight and allowed that feeling to flourish and overcome many unexpected challenges. Sixteen years later, I still can't believe we got married after knowing each other only six months! Ain't love grand?
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Fehlende Folgen?
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I didn't think it was a big deal when my child was diagnosed with ADHD. I was blissfully ignorant of the challenges laid before use. But, I learned a lot when my child was diagnosed with ADHD. Not just about the disease, but also how to advocate my ADHD superhero and all of my children! It has taught me immensurate patience, unconditional love, flexibility, and adaptability at a whole new level. It has helped me to be a better mom.
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Do you ever hear anyone criticize an older dad? No, you don't! It's absolute bullshit to then criticize an older mom. Why do we still do this to one another? Why can't we respect each other's journeys? Some women have even told me I should have made better choices. But sometimes, it wasn't a choice! It was a situation that was out of our control. As women, we should support each other and our choices, and we should know we all have to travel our own journey. Don't give others permission to judge you or question your choices. You're perfect the way you are, and your choices are perfect in their own way.
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I recently got slapped and got slapped hard! Why? Because when asked why I work so hard, I said I wanted to pay for my kiddos' college education. The person assumed incorrectly that my children felt entitled to this promise. She didn't realize that I work and work hard because it is what I want to do for my kids. I don't want them to have to work while they are in school. I don't want them to get crippling student loans. It is my choice to invest in a solid foundation for their future! And the future of my hypothetical grandchildren!
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My husband's dream house is a ginormous monstrosity in the Caribbean. A place where our family connections weakened in the square footage and junk we collected. In all honesty, I hate it. Though I always tried to like it for his sake. When the pandemic happened, we moved to our small condo in Florida. Since the move, we are more connected, have more heartfelt conversations, and have stronger familial bonds became. We are going, tiny mamas! It's my turn to have my dream home!
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My biggest challenge was and still is not the pandemic. It was that my girls became teenagers. Yes, things have changed! I have to remind myself that even if they look more like adults, they are not adults! So hard to remember! They behave as though every decision they make is final, so they often feel overwhelmed. And they act out! On top of all this, I also have to help my husband not lose his mind. I continuously remind myself this is temporary. One day the teen years will be over!
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Since the New Year is around the corner, I'm going to talk about changes. This year, I have to decide (again) whether or not we'll home school the following year; I'm fighting my husband about returning to our home in the Caribbean; the girls will be turning fourteen, and it feels like it's the beginning of them leaving our home behind. There are so many possibilities. I don't feel scared, but I feel a little overwhelmed.
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I'm fifty-four years old, and I believe in Santa Claus! Why? Because I believe in the goodness of humanity. I really believe that Santa represents the best of humanity -- hope and kindness. I'm glad that I have fostered my children's belief in Santa Claus. Because, by extension, I am reinforcing their ability to hope, be kind, and receive kindness.
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I'm fifty-four years old, and I believe in Santa Claus! Why? Because I believe in the goodness of humanity. And I really believe that Santa represents the best of humanity, be it a meal, a much-needed hug, a new toy, a used toy, a kind word. Santa is the best that humanity has to give to one another, hope and kindness. I believe that by helping my children believe in magic, I help Santa keep that magic alive, hope, and kindness, not only during Christmas time but throughout the year.
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November 21st is a special day because that's when the elves on the shelf come home. This year, the elves didn't check-in during the year. I tried to bribe them to visit us early, but they wouldn't be bribed! I miss their visits. They bring the magic of childhood—magic so strong that it goes back and brings out the best in my own childhood memories. The elves represent hope—of better behavior, overcoming challenges, a glimpse into a future with grandchildren.
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I took thanksgiving for granted, thinking that there would always be another in which I would enjoy my family and friends. Then the pandemic hit, making sure I will never take this special holiday for granted ever again! I am so grateful for my friends and family that we have not lost any of them in the pandemic despite several becoming very ill. I'm grateful for my husband and children. I'm thankful that despite all the challenges we have faced this year, I can still recognize that I have a lot to be grateful for.
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As parents, we have this idea that our children should be perfect. But do we really expect perfection? It's healthy not to always be perfect. Nothing's wrong with stepping back and saying that something is not just for us. We all go through phases in our lives, especially our kids—lying, unpleasant habits, slacking—these are things that we need to experience. It's normal. I just hope that through their phases and experiences, my kids learn to be the best versions of themselves that they can be.
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It takes too much effort to be perfect. But in reality, we, as human beings and as moms, cannot be perfect. So let's try instead to be great moms. We have to accept that we will never have all the answers, and our kids should know that. They should know that we, too, make mistakes but are willing to learn from them and that we'll exert every effort to make them the very best version of themselves that they could possibly be.
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I'm struggling with whether or not we should celebrate the Day of the Dead this year. Somehow, it just feels wrong in a year when the world feels like it's falling around us. But at the same time, it seems wrong not to do it at a point where my daughter is exploring her Mexican heritage. After all, the Day of the Dead is a celebration of life, human resilience over tragedy, and a celebration of culture.
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We have always enjoyed Halloween. However, we were not sure we would be celebrating this year due to the pandemic. Still, I had to get creative, just I had been during the below zero Halloweens! I couldn't allow this Halloween to slip through my fingers when I have so few left with my girls! They are 13! Soon they will off to college! Luckily I will have my little bug for a few more years to make the transitions easier.
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Have you ever had the mom meltdown? It's when you literally feel like butter melting by the heat of all the responsibilities and commitments you have. I love my husband and my children, but that doesn't mean I don't get overwhelmed sometimes. I try to spend individual time with my children and husband, and by night time, I'm just so exhausted! So I have a meltdown now and again because I need this break, and I should be able to take it without guilt!
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Have you ever witnessed teens in shouting matches with their parents, siblings hitting each other, or teens throwing tantrums like two-year-olds? As older parents, we didn’t want to go through this! We have avoided it so far by parenting with a purpose. We focused on natural consequences and problem-solving skills, modeled good behavior, and apologized when we made mistakes. Are our kids perfect? Nope! But we don’t feel overwhelmed as we go through these naturally rebellious years.
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One of the toughest moments as a mother was when one of my twins was released from the NICU. I was terrified I would not be able to handle the baby coming home with me and mortified that I had left one of my babies in the hospital. Guilt, fear, and anger ate at me, marring what I thought would be the happiest times as a new mom!
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