Episodes
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If a child in the foster care system spent 18 years in the same home, you might assume that they developed a strong sense of belonging within the family. But unfortunately, this is not always the case.
When Tash Haynes was born, her biological mother was unable to raise a child due to a mental disability. Fortunately, Tash was taken in by a family—but after growing up in their house until she aged out of the foster care system, Tash felt that although her basic needs had been met, her emotional needs had not.
Today, Tash is a renowned content creator, a community builder, and a mother of three girls. She is beyond proud of the family and career she’s been able to build despite the obstacles life has thrown her way.
In this episode, Tash gets candid about why it’s crucial to make sure children in foster care feel a sense of belonging, how showing her own daughters love is helping to heal the little girl inside of her, how God’s redemptive character has been on display in her life, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/tash-haynes-230/
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The lives of today’s guests are deeply intertwined.
Jennifer Bracken’s childhood was rocky. After a difficult home life and several tumultuous years spent in the foster care system, she became a mother to four children and her struggles with addiction led to her family experiencing the foster care system in various ways.
Jillana Goble is a speaker, author, and advocate who fostered and adopted Jennifer’s third child before fostering and reuniting Jennifer’s fourth child.
Over the past 15 years, Jillana and Jennifer have taken steps to build a positive relationship. Today, they live a mile away from one another and their lives are interconnected in a beautiful way. Their journey together wasn’t always smooth sailing—but due to their mutual effort, courage, and vulnerability, they have developed deep trust and connection.
In this episode, Jennifer and Jillana talk about how they’ve navigated the ups and downs of building their relationship, how foster parents can form connections with birth parents in a safe and healthy way, the importance of extending the olive branch early, and so much more. Don’t miss this one!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jillana-jennifer-229/
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We all pray for our children to form a strong relationship with Jesus that will last a lifetime. But the truth is, many young adults walk away from their faith once they move out.
So what steps can we take to help our kids walk with Him throughout all the stages of their lives?
Today’s guest, Sarah Cowan Johnson, shares that a big part of the answer when we look at statistics lies in our parenting. Sarah is a ministry trainer, consultant, and coach who works with ministry leaders across the United States and leads seminars on family discipleship—showing parents how to help their children walk in the way of Jesus. Sarah shares key strategies for faith-based parenting in her book Teach Your Children Well: A Step-by-Step Guide for Family Discipleship.
In this episode, Sarah explains the most common pitfalls that stop parents from working worship into their home lives (and how to overcome them), how to disciple children no matter how long they may live under your roof, why it’s essential to let your kids ask questions and develop their own relationships with God, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/sarah-cowan-johnson-228/
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TW: While Joan does not go into specific details, this episode does contain mentions of her experiences of abuse, and we wanted you to be aware of that before listening.
Our guests often share the traumatic memories their experiences in life have left them with. But today’s guest shares what it’s like for there to be pieces missing when she tries to recall her past.
Joan Ulsher is a writer, philanthropist, retired U.S. Army Major, and an award-winning child advocate. During her own childhood, Joan survived abuse and experienced the foster care system firsthand. Today, she says many of her formative years feel like “Swiss cheese” because of all the holes in her memory.
Joan tells her story in a memoir entitled Misplaced Childhood: A True Story of Resiliency and Child Advocacy.
In this conversation, you’ll hear how Joan has navigated her mind blocking out childhood memories, how her advocacy efforts have changed her inner narrative from that of a victim to that of a survivor, how finding Christ has given her life new purpose, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/joan-ulsher-227/
Free Video Resource: Foster Care & the Church -- www.fostercare.church
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Many agency workers who serve the foster care community choose this path out of a passion for helping others. But transitioning into this challenging career can often be a very overwhelming experience. Even when workers are doing their best, they can start to feel like they’re not doing enough and that they don’t have a support system to fall back on in their times of need.
Brian Gazdziak is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker as well as a foster and adoptive dad. He has spent years providing specialized mental health therapy to help people, such as those in the foster care community, cope with life challenges. As someone who has experienced foster care from the perspective of both an agency worker and a foster parent, Brian has unique insights and empathy surrounding the topic of these complex relationships.
In this episode, Brian shares what it’s like to work with children and families in a hands-on capacity, how churches can provide much-needed support to foster care workers, how to build a better relationship with case workers, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/brian-gazdziak-226/
Join Team 3:10: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/team310
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No matter the season of parenting you’re in, there’s one thing every parent needs to prioritize—mental health. Not just your child’s, but your own, too.
It’s easy to look at the behavioral or emotional struggles our children are exhibiting and start thinking of ways to “fix” them. What’s harder is looking inward and asking ourselves what steps we can take to nurture our mental health so we can show up for our kids in the best way.
Joining me today is Michelle Nietert, an author, a speaker, and the Clinical Director/Founder of Community Counseling Associates. She’s also a follower of Christ, a wife, and a mother to two school-aged children who puts her mental health knowledge to use every day as she seeks to nurture a happy and healthy household.
In this episode, Michelle teaches us how to support our children through life’s challenges, how to help children who’ve experienced trauma find hope, joy, and light in life, how to work prayer into your children’s lives as they grow up, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/michelle-nietert-225/
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Cami Haussler’s childhood was marked by turbulence. By the time she was 10, both of her parents had passed away. Her formative years were filled with a long string of life changes, and it seemed like every time she got close to a caregiver, they would leave her.
Eventually, Cami was adopted by her grandparents, but despite the love they showed her, Cami often struggled to let them in, fearing that they too would pass away and leave her alone again.
Today, Cami’s experiences have come full circle—she’s now an adoptive parent who has fostered 12 children and taken on a core role at a private child placement agency.
In this episode, Cami openly shares how the emotional struggles of her childhood molded her into the woman she is today, how her mindset as a foster and adoptive parent had to expand into one of grace and selflessness, the biggest challenges from her experience as an adoptee, how to avoid developing a “savior complex” as a foster parent, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/cami-haussler-224/
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Katie Faris knew that motherhood wasn’t always going to be smooth sailing, but she was more than ready to deal with temper tantrums and dirty diapers. What she wasn’t prepared for was receiving the news that three of her children had been diagnosed with a serious medical condition.
Katie’s story is deeply touching to me. She’s a pastor’s wife and a writer who has shared her journey with others through books like God is Still Good: Gospel Hope and Comfort for the Unexpected Sorrows of Motherhood and He Will Be Enough: How God Takes You by the Hand Through Your Hardest Days.
Woven through both books is her own family’s story as well as stories of others who found God to be trustworthy in the midst of their perplexities.
In this episode, you’ll hear how Katie has walked hand in hand with God through all the ups and downs of her journey, her advice for relying on your community, the power of prayer when hope is hard to find, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/katie-faris-223/
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Has God ever led you somewhere that you were previously scared to go? Are you currently facing a situation where God is inviting you to entrust your fear and concerns to Him?
That’s what happened for Randall Nichols, co-founder of ECHO Family Care Partners and an adoptive parent. Through his work at ECHO, Randall is working to resource churches and businesses to meet the needs of orphaned and vulnerable children and families through foster care, adoption, and wrap-around support.
In this episode, Randall shares the powerful story of connection that introduced their family to special needs adoptions, how to involve your children in the decision to care for others, why community often is the biggest concern for those considering adoption or foster care, the importance of being able to give and receive care, and so much more!
Apply to Become a TFI Advocate: www.tfiadvocate.org
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/randall-nichols-222/
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When Lisa Qualls found out she was pregnant as a teen, it led to an unexpected journey through foster care. After giving birth to her son, she felt conflicting pressure to give him up to be adopted, and it would be 16 years until she would reconnect with him again.
Lisa has a unique perspective as she has experienced the adoption and foster care community as a former foster youth, birth mom, foster mom, and adoptive mom. Lisa is a TBRI® Practitioner, co-founder of Adoption Wise, and co-author of The Connected Parent with Karyn Purvis. She lives in North Idaho with her husband, Russ, with whom she has parented twelve children by birth and adoption.
In this episode, you’ll hear Lisa’s deeply challenging experience in foster care and becoming a mother, her passion for staying connected to a child’s first family whenever possible, how she strives to encourage foster and adoptive families today, and so much more!
Apply to Become a TFI Advocate: www.tfiadvocate.org
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/lisa-qualls-221/
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We’re exploring some deep questions on the podcast this week and I would love to hear how you’re processing them.
How do we navigate painful circumstances in life?
How do we walk with others who are experiencing something deeply challenging?
How do we respond when life doesn’t turn out the way we expected it to?I was so deeply touched during my conversation with my guest today, Katherine Wolf. She is my beautiful sister in Christ who is also a stroke survivor, disability advocate, and author. She and her husband, Jay, have authored two best-selling books Hope Heals and Suffer Strong.
In our conversation, you’ll hear Katherine reveal treasures found in dark times, share practical insights on how to encourage and support those who are struggling, and more!
Listen in!
Apply to Become a TFI Advocate: www.tfiadvocate.org
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/katherine-wolf-220/
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DREION is a husband, father, electrifying singer-songwriter, musician, producer, and performing artist originally from Omaha, Nebraska. He experienced the foster care system as a child at the age of seven, and his story is one of trauma, tragedy, and triumph that the world needs to hear. Today, DREION uses his music to inspire and shed light on this underserved community through powerful storytelling and intentional experiences.
In this episode, you’ll hear DREION openly share his painful experience of entering foster care, why he holds a passion to advocate for foster care reform, the hope he holds for the future, why music holds such a meaningful place in his soul, and his message for other current or former foster youth.
Listen in!
Apply to Become a TFI Advocate: www.tfiadvocate.org
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/dreion-219/
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I am so excited to bring you something a little bit different today. Grace Church of San Diego is letting us feature an episode of their podcast, Deeper Than Sunday, which featured one of our TFI Advocates, Desiree Jacobs.
In this episode, you’ll hear about secondary trauma, being inconvenienced vs. overextended, and what it looks like to bridge the gap between a foster care agency and a church.
I am grateful to Grace Church of San Diego for sharing this episode with us and allowing us to learn from their conversation!
Get notified when TFI Advocate applications go live: https://www.tfiadvocate.org/
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/desiree-jacobs-218/
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What comes to your mind when you hear the word fatherhood?
My guest on the podcast today, Joey Eells, has a passion for fatherhood. When he became a father, he sought to step into that role in a way that would point his children toward their Heavenly Father. Joey is a foster and adoptive parent, and Children’s Pastor at Eastview Christian Church in Normal, Illinois.
In this episode, Joey discusses the role of fatherhood, the complicated relationship that often exists between foster and biological parents, the challenges of navigating the complex needs of children, how to model the love of God as a father, and more! Listen in as Joey vulnerably shares his perspective and experience.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/joey-eells-217/
Get 10% off the Who Loves Series with code "forgottenpod": https://www.wholovesseries.org/
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It can be so hard to let go of control, can't it? We make plans, we set goals, and we want the outcome to be firmly in our grasp. But it’s not always that simple, and God often invites us to release the outcomes to Him.
My guests today experienced this when they decided to start a family and experienced a seven-year delay before it would eventually occur via adoption.
I have the honor of being joined by Michael & Lauren McAfee. Lauren is the founder of Stand for Life and is the Ministry Director at Hobby Lobby Ministry Investments. Michael is the founder and president of Inspire Experiences and a teaching pastor at Council Road Church. Together, they have two daughters through adoption and recently released their book, Beyond Our Control.
In this episode, they walk us through their journey of starting a family, how entitled expectations can rob us of joy, how we can let go of control when we need to, the importance of our emotions, and so much more.
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/michael-lauren-mcafee-216/
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Do you ever find fear rising up within your heart? Does the weight of uncertainty ever feel too heavy to handle? In the foster care community, uncertainty about how our “yes” may impact our family, our marriage, a child in foster care, another family, or even ourselves can throw us into fear and hesitation rather than trust and faith.
I am so excited to welcome Jenn Hand for this conversation. Jenn founded Coming Alive Ministries in 2012 and has the honor of traveling around the world as a missionary and extending the invitation to come alive in Christ. She is an incredible example of someone who listens to God’s direction! She has her Master’s Degree in Trauma Counseling and is the author of five books. Jenn’s most recent book is My Yes is on the Table: Moving From Fear to Faith.
In this episode, Jenn shares about how saying “yes” is linked to surrender, what we can do with our fear, why stepping forward in faith doesn’t always mean forever, and so much more. I really enjoyed this conversation, and am eager to kick off 2024 with this topic!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jenn-hand-215/
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“It was like she was returning a book to a library. She dropped me off and she left. It was one of the most traumatic experiences.” – Melinda Melo
Melinda spent her childhood living in some of the most vulnerable communities in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Due to extreme challenges her mother and family faced, she was neglected and exposed to violence, abuse, crime, and substance abuse. As a result, Melinda was in and out of foster and kinship care from the ages of three to fifteen. Uniquely, Melinda’s mother chose multiple times to place Melinda in foster care, which added an extra layer of trauma and extremely difficult emotions.
In this episode, Melinda shares the circumstances that led to her entering foster care, the effects of your identity being reduced to the labels in your file, how she has made sense of her past, the journey of forgiving her mom and welcoming her into her family’s home, and so much more. Today, Melinda has become a biological, foster, and adoptive parent along with her husband of 13 years, Mike.
Melinda’s story is full of challenge, and her healing journey through it all is incredible. Listen in!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/melinda-melo-214/
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Two years ago, on Episode 130 of The Forgotten Podcast, we had the opportunity to hear Brenna Hunter’s journey to reunification with her children who were placed in foster care due to substance abuse. Today, we get to hear how her story continued, as she eventually started working with the very same agency that managed her case. Brenna is working to be a voice for those who are navigating foster care and spreading hope through her own incredible transformation.
In today’s episode, you’ll hear why biological parents can sometimes feel like the system is out to “get” them, how her perspective of foster care agencies has changed since her case closed, what the biggest challenges of working with other parents walking a similar road to recovery has been, and so much more.
This was a special episode, and I don’t want you to miss it. Listen in!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/brenna-hunter-213/
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"When we didn't have adult care, he was the one that would make sure we needed to eat..."
Aimee Cervantes was placed in foster care with her brother at the young age of four. But she would soon experience another loss as the last familiar person in her world was taken from her. Aimee was separated from her brother and they were adopted by different families—All she knew was his birth name, the name of their mother, and the town they had lived in prior to foster care.
In this episode, Aimee shares her experience of being in different forms of care from group homes, foster care, orphanages, and her eventual adoption. She also talks about the deep impact that being separated from her brother had on her life. While much was lost when Aimee entered foster care, she would find it again in her new family and even locate her biological brother when they were both adults.
This is an episode you simply don't want to miss. Aimee openly shares her experience of the foster care system, adoption, and the beauty of connecting with her brother as an adult. Listen in!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/aimee-cervantes-212/
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Today, I have a beautiful story to share with you here on the podcast.
Amanda Stonesifer and Cheyenne Dillon entered each other’s lives when Amanda’s daughters entered foster care and were placed with Cheyenne in 2020. Cheyenne has always had a passion for building relationships with biological parents connected to the foster care community. What started as home visits transformed into a full-blown partnership and friendship. Today, Cheyenne is the adoptive parent of two of Amanda’s daughters and the pair still have a strong friendship that involves support, sleepovers, attending church together, and long weekend visits.
In our conversation, you'll hear how Amanda and Cheyenne have built connection and trust, the power of partnership in foster care, the assumptions many of us carry, and so much more. I really appreciated this episode and the respect Amanda and Cheyenne truly have towards one another, and I know you will too!
Listen in!
Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/cheyenne-amanda-211/
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