![1568: [Part 2] One Principle Above All Others Will Increase Happiness in Your Marriage by Kristena Eden](https://is1-ssl.mzstatic.com/image/thumb/Podcasts116/v4/04/0e/21/040e21e6-8fab-8d46-2f54-24c788f21988/mza_14868833730035112194.jpg/250x250bb.jpg)
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Episode 2137:
Lisa Merlo-Booth tackles the pervasive issue of communication breakdowns in relationships, particularly focusing on the "Deer in the Headlights Phenomenon." She explores the tendency of men to shut down in conversations, leaving their female partners feeling unheard and frustrated. Merlo-Booth offers practical advice for both partners to improve communication, deepen emotional connections, and break the cycle of silence and over-talking.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://lisamerlobooth.com/the-deer-in-the-headlights-phenomenon-a-communication-blunder-in-relationships/
Quotes to ponder:
"The men, almost immediately when the women began speaking, would look like a deer in the headlights and say absolutely nothing."
"If someone is speaking to you, acknowledge that they have spoken; to do otherwise is just plain rude."
"The more silent you remain, the more talkative she will become. Intimacy requires a sharing of oneself with another-emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Start talking!"
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2136:
Kevin from FinancialPanther.com shares a personal story about his family's decision to live without a car, despite moving to a location that significantly increases the distance to their son's daycare. By embracing an electric bike equipped with a child seat, Kevin not only manages to maintain this car-free lifestyle but also highlights the value of making intentional choices about our conveniences and the way we navigate urban environments. His experience serves as a testament to the power of decision-making in aligning with one's values and priorities.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://financialpanther.com/the-things-we-choose/
Quotes to ponder:
"It really is possible to move children around a city without a car."
"It should be about making intentional choices. Buy the things you want. Don’t buy the things you don’t want."
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Episode 2135:
Rachael Pace, writing for Psych Alive.org, illuminates the destructive nature of comparing our current relationships to past ones or those of others. She eloquently argues that such comparisons not only rob us of joy but also pave the way for unfair expectations, bitterness, and a failure to appreciate the unique qualities of our partners. By embracing respect and focusing on the positives, Pace offers a roadmap to nurturing more fulfilling relationships.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.psychalive.org/6-reasons-you-should-never-compare-your-relationships/
Quotes to ponder:
"There is an old saying that goes 'Comparison is the thief of joy.' This phrase has been around for decades, and for good reason. The moment you start comparing your partner to another relationship is the moment you choose to be unhappy."
"Stop comparing your spouse to someone else and start looking at their positive qualities and loving them for who they are."
"Comparing your partner to someone else isn’t fair. You shouldn’t get serious with someone if your only intention is to change them."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2134:
In Dr. Jack Stoltzfus' insightful piece on Parents Letting Go.com, he challenges parents of young adults to reassess their approach, intertwining love with firmness. By debunking myths of control and responsibility, Stoltzfus guides parents through setting boundaries and expectations that foster independence in their children. His practical advice serves as a blueprint for nurturing a supportive yet empowering environment for young adults navigating their path to maturity.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://parentslettinggo.com/dos-and-donts-in-parenting-young-adults/
Quotes to ponder:
"Consider that our problem may lie more with holding onto these three assumptions than the actions of our young adults. So, challenge this 'stinking thinking' every time it creeps into your psyche."
"We need to try to focus on what we can and can't do, which is under our control, not the young adult's response, which is not under our control."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2133:
Shawna Scafe of Simple on Purpose.ca delves into the undervalued world of stay-at-home moms, contrasting societal perceptions of motherhood. Through personal anecdotes and societal observations, she explores the varied "types" of moms that receive societal approval versus those who don't, ultimately advocating for the recognition of every mother's intrinsic value regardless of their chosen path or societal validation.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://simpleonpurpose.ca/moms-without-value-just-a-mom/
Quotes to ponder:
"It’s a term that makes it socially acceptable to discreetly tear down the value of being a mother."
"You have to know that you are valuable as a mother no matter how mundane it may feel."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2132:
Sara Stanizai's "Setting Boundaries vs. Giving an Ultimatum" explores the nuances of managing personal boundaries within relationships, illustrating how flexibility can lead to healthier interactions and growth. By contrasting rigid ultimatums with adaptable boundaries, Stanizai highlights the importance of communication and mutual respect in nurturing relationships.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.prospecttherapy.com/blog/2020/9/27/setting-boundaries-vs-giving-an-ultimatum
Quotes to ponder:
"Setting a boundary is not an act of restriction but an expression of respect for oneself and others."
"Ultimatums are not about control but about clarifying the consequences of not respecting boundaries."
"Flexibility within boundaries allows relationships to grow and adapt to changing circumstances."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2131:
Sara Stanizai's article, "Setting Boundaries vs. Giving an Ultimatum Part 1," delves into the crucial yet intricate task of setting boundaries, an essential aspect of personal development and healthy relationships. Stanizai underscores the fine line between demanding and asking, advocating for a balanced approach to setting limits that protect and hold individuals accountable. This insightful exploration provides readers with practical strategies for establishing boundaries that are not just firm but flexible, adapting to varying situations and relationships.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.prospecttherapy.com/blog/2020/9/27/setting-boundaries-vs-giving-an-ultimatum
Quotes to ponder:
"Boundaries are not only about other people’s behavior but they’re about keeping your behaviors in check, too."
"The boundary isn’t about the other person - it’s about me."
"Boundaries, within reason, are a great way to set standards in your relationships, and keep yourself accountable for your behaviors, too."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2130:
Discover how Ryan Frederick's insights from Here.life enlighten us on the pivotal role of social fitness in our well-being. Social fitness goes beyond simple friendships, embodying the art of successful interaction and relationship building across various social contexts. As society shifts towards isolation, Frederick highlights environmental influences on social fitness and proposes life stage-specific antidotes to foster stronger community ties, urging us to value the place we live in as a tool for enhancing our social connections.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.here.life/blog/how-does-your-environment-impacting-social-fitness
Quotes to ponder:
"Social fitness is the ability to interact successfully with others, build and maintain positive relationships, and adapt to different social contexts."
"Good relationships keep us healthier and happier. Period."
Episode references:
Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community by Robert Putnam: https://www.amazon.com/Bowling-Alone-Collapse-American-Community/dp/0743203046
The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness by Robert Waldinger: https://www.harvard.com/book/the_good_life/
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2129:
Dr. Kelly Flanagan discusses the underestimated threat that mundane tasks, like dirty dishes, pose to marriages. By weaving a narrative around ordinary family life and the pursuit of storybook endings, Flanagan reveals how embracing the monotony inherent in marriage and viewing it as an opportunity to discover joy and wonder can actually strengthen relationships. This insightful piece encourages readers to find beauty and gratitude in the repetitive tasks that bind the tapestry of family life together.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://drkellyflanagan.com/why-dirty-dishes-are-the-biggest-threat-to-your-marriage/
Quotes to ponder:
"Dirty dishes have killed more marriages than extramarital affairs ever did. Because they’re boring, repetitive, monotonous."
"If we want to discover breathtakingly beautiful love and sacrificial living, we will need to learn how to stay in our boredom long enough to unearth the riches buried just beneath the surface of our monotony."
"Gratitude. That love is just a word, but a clean bowl is love and sacrifice in action."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2128:
In Kalen Bruce's enlightening piece for FreedomSprout.com, he invites us to reconsider the common, yet often unnecessary, habit of apologizing for aspects of our lives that merely reflect our humanity and personal circumstances. From the state of our homes and cars to our financial capabilities and personal boundaries, Bruce offers a liberating perspective on embracing our authentic selves without the burden of guilt. His message encourages a shift towards self-acceptance and intentional communication, promoting a healthier, guilt-free way of interacting with the world.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://freedomsprout.com/stop-apologizing/
Quotes to ponder:
"The attitude of 'that's just how I am, take it or leave it' is still a sign of immaturity. As an adult, it's your responsibility to figure out which of your traits are toxic and to eventually learn how to fix them."
"We could all apologize less and show more grace to others in these situations."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2127:
Evan Marc Katz delves into the pitfalls of prioritizing physical attractiveness and intellect over emotional compatibility in relationships. Sharing personal anecdotes and professional insights, Katz illuminates the often overlooked aspects of partnership that contribute to lasting happiness. He advocates for a balanced approach to choosing a partner, emphasizing the importance of shared values and life goals over superficial traits.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/chemistry/why-chasing-attraction-is-a-losing-strategy-in-love
Quotes to ponder:
"Attraction is not a choice, but choosing a partner based on attraction alone is a choice destined for disappointment."
"Compatibility, often overshadowed by chemistry, should stand equally tall in the realm of relationship foundations."
"The happiest relationships are those where love whispers louder than attraction."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2126:
Chris Libby and Thomas Lickona delve into the pressing issue of instilling kindness in children, emphasizing the crucial role of parental influence and moral authority. They propose six practical strategies for fostering a compassionate and respectful family environment. By adopting these methods, parents can lay a strong foundation for their children's moral development, ensuring they grow into considerate and grateful individuals.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://livehappy.com/relationships/6-ways-to-raise-kinder-kids/
Quotes to ponder:
"Creating a family mission statement gives your children a sense of belonging to something bigger than themselves."
"Gratitude is an act of kindness and ingratitude is an act of unkindness"
"We should teach our children what gratitude means and why thankfulness is important."
Episode references:
How to Raise Kind Kids by Thomas Lickona: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/how-to-raise-kind-kids-thomas-lickona/1126791895
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2125:
Dr. Laura Markham offers transformative insights on navigating tough conversations with children at Aha Parenting.com. By prioritizing understanding, managing personal emotions, and fostering a safe environment, Markham demonstrates how conflicts become opportunities for growth and deeper connection. Her approach challenges parents to shift perspectives, ensuring that each difficult dialogue strengthens the bond with their child.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.ahaparenting.com/read/conversations-kids
Quotes to ponder:
"Starting out on the offensive will only slam the doors of communication. If you can control your emotions and keep the conversation safe, your child may be able to stop being defensive and start sharing."
"Don't take it personally. This isn't really about you. It's about them: their tangled up feelings, their difficulty controlling themselves, their immature ability to understand and express their emotions."
"Remember that more than one perspective can be true at once. Assume your child has a reason for her views or behavior. It may not be what you would consider a good reason, but she has a reason."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2124:
Dr. Marni Feuerman, in collaboration with Gottman.com, offers a deep dive into the complexities of handling conflict in relationships, emphasizing that a significant portion of disputes are perpetual and unsolvable. Through "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by Dr. John Gottman, Feuerman underscores the importance of managing rather than eliminating conflict, providing readers with practical blueprints for navigating the inevitable challenges that arise in partnerships, fostering understanding, growth, and a stronger bond.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.gottman.com/blog/managing-vs-resolving-conflict-relationships-blueprints-success/
Quotes to ponder:
"69% of problems in a relationship are unsolvable."
"Discussing them is constructive and provides a positive opportunity for understanding and growth."
"Moving from gridlock to dialogue involves examining the meaning and dreams that form the basis for each partner’s steadfast perspective."
Episode references:
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0553447718
Aftermath of a Fight or Regrettable Incident booklet: https://www.lifeworkspsychotherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Aftermath-of-a-Fight-or-Regrettable-Incident-Eri-Kardos.pdf
The Marriage Minute newsletter from Gottman Institute: https://www.gottman.com/marriage-minute/
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2123:
In Ingrid Y. Helander's enlightening piece, "Your Worsening Worry Wants Your Help to De-Stress," the author sheds light on the transformative power of acknowledging and naming your worries. Through a compassionate and insightful approach, Helander guides us to a better understanding and management of our stress and anxiety, illustrating the profound benefits of forming a relationship with our internal experiences to promote healing and resilience.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://ingridyhelanderlmft.com/your-worsening-worry-wants-your-help-to-de-stress/
Quotes to ponder:
"Names provide definition, meaning and most importantly a calm connection."
"Creating a name and relationship with the parts of you that are stressed out does not increase the worry. In fact, it calms anxiety and empowers you to be helpful."
"This is the beginning of your journey together with your worry, anxiety and stress. Remember that no part of you is trying to hurt you."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2122:
In "Are You Addicted To Your Ex? To Love? Or Are You Still Grieving?" by Dr. Margaret Rutherford, delve into the emotional complexities of holding onto past relationships. Dr. Rutherford expertly guides readers through the dangers of yo-yo relationships, love addiction, and the struggle to emotionally divorce, providing insights on recognizing the difference between normal grieving and a detrimental inability to let go. This article is a must-read for anyone finding themselves stuck in the past, offering valuable perspectives on moving forward with strength and clarity.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://drmargaretrutherford.com/are-you-addicted-to-your-ex-to-love-or-are-you-still-grieving/
Quotes to ponder:
"Love addicts live in a chaotic world of desperate need and emotional despair."
"Healthy relationships don’t complete your life. They enhance your already fulfilled life."
"Forgiveness is key. Both of you must take responsibility for your end of whatever caused the break-up; this is vital for a relationship to reemerge."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2121:
In today’s heartfelt exploration, Greg Audino tackles the profound impact of parental loss, offering solace and strategies to navigate the ensuing loneliness. Audino emphasizes the transformative power of cherishing memories, embracing the healing process, and recognizing the strength that emerges from grief. This episode is a beacon of hope for anyone grappling with the absence of loved ones, providing insight into the journey towards healing and growth.
Quotes to ponder:
"Every time you reach out for help, share a good memory about your parents, forgive your parents, take care of yourself, allow yourself to embrace these feelings without suppressing them, you are returning back to stasis."
"To feel lonely without them is much better than to feel indifference, resentment, or joy."
"As you now join the legion of billions of people on this earth who understand what it means to lose a parent, your senses of compassion and connectedness can grow."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2120:
Nia Shanks of NiaShanks.com dispels the myth that strength training is solely for physical transformation, advocating instead for its empowering, measurable, and inherently motivating benefits. Shanks highlights the diversity in strength training methods and its significance beyond aesthetic goals, encouraging women to embrace strength for personal growth and empowerment.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.niashanks.com/women-should-train-strength/
Quotes to ponder:
"Strength training is not about becoming less but becoming more, about unleashing your true potential."
"Focus on getting stronger, and nothing else."
"Each time you return to the gym, your mission is clear - do just a little better than last time."
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2119:
Tonya Lester illuminates the perils of over-functioning in relationships, emphasizing the hidden costs of unrealistic self-expectations and the imbalance it creates. She offers insightful strategies for breaking the cycle of over-functioning, encouraging a balanced approach to shared responsibilities and self-acceptance. Lester's guidance promises a pathway to healthier relationships and a fuller appreciation of life's true priorities.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.tonyalester.com/blog/are-your-working-too-hard-in-your-relationship
Quotes to ponder:
"Your problem is how you are going to spend this one and precious life you have been issued. Whether you're going to spend it trying to look good and creating the illusion that you have power over circumstances, or whether you are going to taste it, enjoy it and find out the truth about who you are.”
Episode references:
Fair Play: https://www.amazon.com/Fair-Play-Share-Responsibilities-Smarter/dp/0525541934
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Discover all of the podcasts in our network, search for specific episodes, get the Optimal Living Daily workbook, and learn more at: OLDPodcast.com.
Episode 2118:
Dan Schmidt's article with NerdFitness.com, "The S*** They Don't Tell You: 12 Things New Parents Need to Know – Part 2," dives deep into the unspoken challenges and transformations that come with parenthood. From the relentless worry to the undeniable changes in relationships and self-identity, Schmidt provides a candid and humorous look at what it truly means to navigate the journey of raising children. Offering both solace and a reality check, the article is a must-read for new and prospective parents wrestling with the complexities of family life.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/the-shit-they-dont-tell-you-12-things-new-parents-need-to-know/
Quotes to ponder:
"The Worry is possibly the hardest and least relenting battle on the quest."
"You will think they’re dying at least a dozen times in their first year."
"Your sleep habits are forced to change, your lifestyle is forced to change, your finances are forced to change, and you as a person will change too."
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