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  • Smart Dating Academy client love stories are YOUR favorites (and ours too) - these stories are from people just like you who started our process with a healthy dose of excitement and nervousness! I am so excited to have Ruth tell you one of the most unique, awesome, and unexpected love stories in this week's podcast. Ruth is an amazing high level executive client who is full of life. After her beloved husband passed away years ago, Ruth felt like the rug was pulled from under her and she felt lost after this unexpected loss. Once she found her footing again, she decided to date casually, because finding a new partner wasn’t a priority.

    Through her dating process, she realized that she now wanted someone wonderful and available. Understanding that her priorities had changed, she contacted Bela, after a friend told her about Smart Dating Academy. Ruth attended one of Bela’s workshops for C200 Professional Women, and after some back and forth decided to work with SDA to find love again. Ruth came to Chicago for her photoshoot and worked with Ilene on perfecting her profile and what characteristics Ruth is looking for in a partner by looking at the elevator people in her life.

    After launching on the apps, Ruth looked through the responses and talked to a few people. But one stood out. His name is Tony and the caveat was that he was traveling back to his home country of Nigeria, which threw a curveball at Ruth. Nevertheless, Tony and Ruth talked on the phone and on FaceTime every day for over 4 months, before they met for the first time in person. Tony kept splitting his time between the US and Nigeria and they kept their relationship going. Ruth loves Tony’s integrity and knows that she has found the lid to her pot. Ruth and Tony have lots of plans for the future.
    Ruth's story is an inspiration that no matter where you are on your journey or in your career and no matter your age, love can come to you in an unexpected package with the right guidance and love coaches!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

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    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • I am excited to have Wendy Sloane as my guest.

    Wendy is a former TV producer for The Phil Donahue Show and The Geraldo Rivera Show. During her career in broadcasting, she covered some of the biggest news stories of our time, including the O.J. Simpson and JonBenet Ramsey murders. She was also the host of the popular radio show "What's Up with Wendy" and started her popular podcast "Divorce Doesn't Suck" during Covid - about new perspectives and how to move forward and focus on the future and take the chance to restart with a blank new canvas.

    We talked about:Her career as a TV producer and what led her to change her careerHow her divorce led her to start her podcastWhat she knows now that she wish she knew then about divorceHow dating looked like for her as a single momHer experience with long distance dating (there were alot of FaceTime dates!)The process of smart datingThe Golden Bachelor ShowListen up if you are a single man or woman dating at any time! Our conversation about Wendy's ideal man turned into a mini-coaching session about how to be a smart dater! So many great takeaways (and most things apply to women of all ages!). You don't want to miss this episode!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

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    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

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  • Get ready to dive deep into the world of hormones with the charismatic Dr. Anna Cabeca! She is known nationally as The Girlfriend Doctor and is host of The Girlfriend Doctor Show. Dr. Anna is triple-board certified and a fellow of gynecology and obstetrics, integrative medicine, and anti-aging and regenerative medicine.



    From testosterone to estrogen, progesterone to dopamine, each hormone has its own unique influence on our emotions and behaviors towards our partner.
    In this episode, we will dive deep into the mysterious interplay between oxytocin and cortisol, and how it affects your romantic relationships, friendships, interpersonal dynamics, and overall well-being. She explains how the 'love hormone', oxytocin, can breathe life into your relationship, and grab practical tips to boost your oxytocin levels naturally through diet. We also talk about the secret behind the ebb and flow of intimacy as she demystifies the fascinating hormonal changes over time.


    It's time to get intimate with your hormones, get enlightened, and spice up your life!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

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    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • I couldn't be more excited to have a conversation with the fabulous Tamsen Fadal - I met Tamsen while doing dozens of love segments on her TV Show in NYC on PIX11. Tamsen is an award-winning journalist (she won 13 Emmy awards!), speaker, author, podcast host and menopause advocate. She is dedicated to championing women’s stories being bold in midlife and beyond and shares advice and education on menopause, relationships, divorce and career so that women do not feel alone during this stage in their lives.

    We talk about:Starting a matchmaking business before dating apps existed and what she learned from thatTamsen's experience with divorce and dating after divorceHow she met her 2nd husband and how she knew he was the one (and she didn't think she would ever remarry!)Advice on dating and meeting the one in midlifeWhat an "easy relationship" REALLY meansThe moment that made her become a menopause advocateTamsen's advice on taking the action to lead a fulfilling lifeMake-up tips (check out her IG for more amazing tips)

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela


  • This week we are bringing to you your favorite kind of episode: another love story from one of our dear clients who will inspire you with her self-awareness, action, and authenticity at a young age. Bianca is a 36-year-old Chemist who lives in Ontario, Canada. Bianca describes herself as a late bloomer and an introverted, independent woman by nature. By her mid-twenties nearly everyone she knew was married and often to the only person they had ever dated. Bianca was puzzled on how this worked for them, but not for her.


    After several unsuccessful relationships, Bianca still couldn’t analyze what had specifically gone wrong. One day, she saw Bela on the Steve Harvey Show and on Good Morning America and got in touch with Smart Dating Academy. Through coaching and devoutly following the advice from Bela and Lindsay, she realized that she had so many false beliefs that were holding her back. Bianca soaked everything up during her sessions, got more confident in dating, AND adopted the mindset of being psychotically optimistic in her entire life.

    At the start of 2021, Bianca met Derek online and after their first date she thought that she would not hear back from him. But she did! They went on a second date and many more to follow. Bianca got to know him more and more and Bianca realized that he is the lid to her pot. Bianca and Derek got married last year in 2023 and couldn’t be happier to be real partners in life. She is absolutely adorable, and you will hear your own story in hers.


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

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    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • This week, Dr. Wendy Walsh joins me to talk about the science of love. Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, a Radio Host & Podcaster, the author of three books on relationships & thousands of print and digital articles.


    Dr. Wendy shares with us how she got to where she is today and how she went from news anchor to relationship expert, as well as what we can do to attract the best love.


    We talk about:

    What attachment theory is and how you can change your attachment style
    How different attachment styles work together in a relationship
    The importance your "tribe" plays in picking the right partner
    What butterflies in your stomach really mean
    What to do to get over being attracted to "bad boys" (and this may take a long time)
    The RIGHT way to process your feelings (shame is the hardest one to process!)
    The role self love and positive talk plays in finding true love
    How to have emotional conversations and why is it important in building great relationships
    What boundaries really are and how to enforce them the right way
    This episode is a must listen! Dr. Wendy drops so many lovely gems during our conversation that you don't want to miss!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • In this week's episode, I'm having a conversation with the lovely Dr. Sheva Assar about how we can amp up our confidence, especially in the dating world. Dr. Sheva is a clinical psychologist and she has a specific interest in the areas of self confidence, establishing and maintaining healthy, fulfilling relationships, and living authentic, value-oriented lives. Dr. Sheva believes that the relationship that we have with ourselves, particularly how we think and respond to ourselves, is the foundation for our relationships with others. Let that sink in for a moment!


    We talked about:

    How we can be more confident in a world that often makes us question ourselvesHow to challenge our own self-doubting beliefs & why writing them down before dates is so useful!
    Ask open-ended questions to build authentic relationships
    How we can express how we feel the RIGHT way during a conflict/ disagreement
    Ways to be more authentic throughout the dating process
    How investing in other areas of our world can make us a more confident dater

    This episode is a must listen if you want to be more authentically YOU during dates!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • WIll dating a friend ruin the friendship? The answer to this question, as you might expect, is complicated, and there isn't a firm yes or no. It's going to depend on you, and the person. Before you get into the relationship, look at this person crucially. Listen to this amazing podcast where Bela explains the eight crucial things to consider before jumping into a relationship with a friend (and she has a LOT of experience with this with her own marriage and clients)!

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Bela will share an amazing set of sentences that she learned serendipitously from Dan Harris that will bring you more joy, ease, and reduce anxiety. It has changed her world in the last week, and everyone she has shared it with has LOVED it. Today, she's giving it all to us in this jewel of a mini episode. Be ready for things to change for you in a very loving way.

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela


  • This week I'm having a fun conversation with Lane Moore, who was the "sex / relationships" editor at Cosmo, is an award-winning actor, author, and comedian. Moore is most famously known as the creator and star of one of the most well-reviewed comedy shows in the world, Tinder Live, where she projects her dating app onto a screen, swipes through profiles live on stage, and the audience votes whether she swipes right or left, to cathartic, hilarious, and surprisingly kind results.


    We talk about:Fun moments on her Tinder Live shows
    Her books "How to be Alone" (and it starts with accepting who we are and what we need) and "How to Find Your People"
    What self-love and self-worth really means (I love her defintion)
    How a pet can help you feel healthy, happy, and unconditional love and heal from heartbreak
    How to form authentic adult friendships
    Different attachment styles and what they mean in friendships
    Friend breakups: How to know when to leave and how to do it
    The ONLY time ghosting is ok
    What being vulnerable REALLY meansYou don't want to miss this high energy episode filled with awesome advice on how to find YOUR people.

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Get ready to be inspired by another true "finding love story" from one of our awesome clients that found the most amazing love (and it took a longgg time)! Massive plot twist here, by the way, that you won't believe, so listen to the WHOLE thing! Courtney Bass Sherizen is a badass HR Executive with two degrees from Harvard and is also a certified yoga teacher. She just celebrated her 4 year wedding anniversary and has a 2 year old. But just a few years ago she was in your shoes looking for love.


    Courtney was on a long and arduous journey when it came to dating and was longing to find a lasting partner and to be a mom. Her parents saw Bela on the Steve Harvey Show and encouraged Courtney to reach out to SDA, which changed her course forever and fixed her picker. You literally will not believe how Dan won Courtney's lasting love and marriage - still blows me away (yes, men that want to be with you will move MOUNTAINS to be with you)


    You will hear:How Courtney had to overcome self doubt and fear when it comes to datingHow she found out about Smart Dating AcademyHow the online dating stats used to bring her downHow she used to hide parts of herself and held up barriers to protect who she was - which prevented her from showing up in relationshipsHow she fixed her picker with Lindsay's helpHow Dan reached out to Courtney, and why she said NO at first :)How she KNEW she wanted to be a mother, and wouldn't settle for lessHow Courtney left Dan, and why he came back SHORTLY thereafter (and what changed) - this is truly amazingHow they blend their families together (Courtney is African American and Dan was raised in the Jewish faith)You will absolutely love Courtney telling her love story! Love came in an unexpected package for her and it can come for you, too!

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

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    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • This week the amazing Kate Anthony, author of The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage and the creator of the groundbreaking online coaching program, Should I Stay or Should I Go? came to chat with me about all things involving the decision if we should divorce or breakup.


    Kate empowers women to find their strength, passion, and confidence even in the most disempowering of circumstances and helps them move forward with concrete plans.

    There are some of the incredible insights that Kate shares with us to help you navigate one of the toughest decisions of your life.


    Kate talks about:The very first thing women need to look at when trying to make this decision (which is not what you might think!)How to get to know yourself againThe Research that shows why women are often unhappy in their marriages (which will blow your mind)Why women often feel like they aren't enough without a partnerWhat you should feel in a healthy relationship and an emotionally abusive relationshipWhat feeling to look for in a relationship that are major red flags (and that applies for all non-heterosexual relationships)What the difference is between a narcissist and a sociopathYou don't want to miss this awesome episode! Even if you are not thinking about divorce, you can get so many eye-opening and great takeaways.


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • JJ Virgin, Fitness Hall of Famer, triple-board certified nutrition expert and TV personality, has an amazing conversation with Bela about aging powerfully and sexily at ALL ages! JJ is 60, and you'd think she was DECADES younger while looking at her. She explains why body composition is crucial, why tracking is good for you, lifting heavy things is "everything" and HOW to do this. She is inspiring and will kick your new year off in an AMAZING way!!

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela


  • This episode is for EVERYONE -- single, coupled, introverted & extroverted!! Bela talks with best-selling author Debra Fine, about HOW to make 'small talk' and WHY it's so important! You'll hear:

    Small talk is a SKILL - not a gift the lucky were born withHow Debra, an introverted engineer, realized she did not know how to interact with people at work conferencesHow she thought losing 75 lbs would 'make her better' at small talk, but it didn'tWhy Rex, and one conversation, changed EVERYTHING for herHow to "be prepared" - and feel great before any conversationWhy "what keeps you busy" is a WAY better question than "what do you do?"How to look for 'free info' that people give away about themselvesHow to BE a good conversationalist (being an 'introvert' is no excuse)How she met the love of her life - and WHY she knew he was the oneHow to exit conversations with the "wrap up" rule - so no one holds you hostage!

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • In this episode, Bela interviews Dr. Justin Garia, Executive Director of the Kinsey Institute and Scientific Adviser to Match.com. Justin leads Kinsey, the foremost experts and thought leaders on sex/sexuality. We discuss the hottest topics in sex research, why second dates really matter, the upsides and downsides of dating apps, aging & sex (and the Golden Bachelor), orgasms for younger and older singles, and the TOP 5 thing singles are REALLY looking for in relationships according to Match's research on "Single In America!" You won't want to miss this episode !


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

  • Everyone's favorite segments are the love stories! Dr. Laura, a physician in Chicago, found love online at 49 years old! She had never been married, had a great career, and suffered from a bad picker. Laura said to herself, "If I can do an Ironman, I can find my soulmate!" Laura heard an interview with Bela, and she reached out to find her soulmate! That action changed the course of everything, and helped her find her amazing FBI agent husband, Doug! You'll hear:

    How Laura went through some cruel times in school because of a birthmarkHow her 'bad picker' started back in high school (crushed hard on gay guys - didn't know they were gay)!How she started falling for emotionally unavailable ones in her 20s (starving artists, long-distance, and more)This continued on well into her 40s, while her career was booming and she became a full fledged Iron Man triathlete!She heard Bela interviewed by Arielle Ford, and reached out to BelaWhat the key things Smart Dating Academy (SDA) did to FIX HER PICKER!How her "last first date" happened with Doug, who was an FBI agent that had adopted three daughters from China!How she knew, finally that Doug was the ONE!! (it's Bela's favorite word about relationships - spoiler alert)How they got married at a ceremony at her house and are living happily ever after!It's Peak Dating Season, and the perfect time for YOU to start YOUR new plan to find love! If Laura can do an Ironman AND find her SOULMATE, so can YOU!! Schedule your 1:1 session with us today to "be like Laura" and make 2024 the year that changes EVERYTHING!


    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela


  • Dr. Marisa Cohen joins Bela talking about the four 'relationship killers' that harm every relationship from dating to friendships to family. And, you'll hear HOW to have difficult conversations with ANYONE in your life without harm. We also talk about the loneliness epidemic, how Marisa experimented with going on 30 'new friend' dates in 30 days (and if that worked to cure loneliness), how mindset is everything, and how Marisa met her husband on a dating app!

    Join our free newsletter database by signing up here: www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

    Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy

    Schedule your consultation with us here! We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you! https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela