Episodes
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This episode traverses the theme of building autistic community.
We recognise the dearth of opportunities for autistic people to connect in real time. We share our ideas around how we might like to play a small part in facilitating aspects of this, for example by having guests on the podcast and running groups. We discuss various elements of this from practical, professional and ethical points of view.
We recognise that perhaps the paucity of "out" autistic therapists combined with the lack of existing resources possibly means that in the beginning there will inevitably be "boundary" issues to confront and navigate. More neuroqueering of the norms, we wonder?
As ever, we would love love love to hear your thoughts, ideas and feedback 💛🧡
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This episode was recorded on the day when we had planned a pilot "Odd One In" group meeting.
We cancelled the group with 24 hours notice because only two people had signed up at that point.
We reflect on our relationships to change, flexibility, choice and managing our own ways of being alongside considering others with a variety of needs.
Siana rants about the logistics of the booking system for her Zumba class ... and somehow Leo manages to segway from this into his history of superstition and OCD.
We compare and contrast these experiences with the common autistic activities of sorting and ordering. We then explore the value of certain rituals and ways of doing things from an aesthetic, practical or symbolic point of view.
As ever, we would love to hear your thoughts and comments - [email protected]
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LINKS
Autisticality
A Guide To Autistic Experience (book)
Leo's pleasingly sliced lemon
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Missing episodes?
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In this episode we discuss the concept of Autistic Demand Avoidance.
Siana differentiates ADA from PDA and speaks from her own experience of how it shows up across a range of areas in her life.
We also check in on Leo's ADHD clinical diagnosis journey. We notice how classic traits of hyperactivity and inattention feature in our lives.
We then discuss some aspects of privilege and class related to lifestyle and "choice". We also introduce a few considerations which seem pertinent to therapeutic relationships.
We do, of course, distract and delight in words and meanings along the way ... which quite possibly says as much about what we are talking about as what we actually say 💛🧡
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This episode is a fairly run-of-the-mill chit chat from a random Thursday in the middle of September.
Themes include doing things for the first time, seasonal rhythms, breathing, special interests and the significance of "perspective".
We showcase Leo's new drone and Siana would like to apologise for "droning" on a bit about her cough.
Bonus SPIN-ny energy at the end 🧡💛
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LINKS
Disability Empowerment Now podcast (DEN)
One of Leo's drone videos
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Leo is currently on the NHS pathway towards trying out ADHD medication. We discuss his experience of the assessment process so far. We then explore Siana's experience as a parent navigating the system.
We speak about common obstacles and concerns within the process. We also reflect on whether medication might have changed outcomes for each of us in education and / or the workplace.
We attempt to navigate elements of privilege sensitively and acknowledge that this is an initial conversation which was hope will spark further discussion and reflection.
We would love to hear your thoughts! 🧡💛
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Group booking
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This episode is an excerpt from a follow up conversation we had regarding the gap between season 1 and 2.
We reflect on a health situation Leo had to navigate over the summer. We discuss aspects of communication within the health care system and also between us. We also notice our tendency as autistic people to deal with what is in front of us and then to appear to “forget” about it until there is an unconscious reminder.
The good news is that Leo is fine and recovered. Thank-you for listening and for all your support.
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This episode contains our reflections around beginning a new podcast season.
We discuss the gap in recording and wonder about some aspects of this. We explore the concepts of autistic burnout and energy cycles. We also speak about inherent neurodivergence as opposed to the signs of neurodivergent distress or trauma.
It will be no surprise that we digress lots. We conclude that we will continue to record for another “season”.
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Group booking
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Welcome to Season 2 💛 🧡
This episode was recorded just after Leo returned from Autscape.
We explore his experience and broaden this out to discuss the hallmarks of wider autistic culture.
We then reflect on some of the perils and pitfalls inherent in making the transition "back" and between autistic land and neurotypical society.
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Autscape
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This episode opens with a discussion of the "Hamilton" theatre production. Leo delights in the complexity of the rapid lyrical genius, enjoying being caught up in the current and looking forward to revisiting it again and again. Siana's experience, in contrast, is one of overwhelm and withdrawal.
This is an example of polarities often seen within the autistic community and the significance of context when looking at our capacities and challenges.
Siana reflects further on wearing Loop™ earplugs to manage overstimulation - at the theatre, on the tube and recently when out in a social context. We compare this with other ways in which we and others use all sorts of "accommodations" to manage our external and internal relationships and interactions.
We then switch to speaking about communication within a therapeutic context, including aspects such as body language, eye contact and silence.
Thank you for listening to us. If you have any comments or feedback, positive or negative, we are open and would love to hear from you.💛🧡----more----LINKS
Loop earplugs
Radiolab - Stravinsky's Rite of Spring
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In this episode we discuss Leo's recent experience of attending a training course.
We track many details of this, from the planning to sensory challenges and considerations, to social interactions and disclosure.
We notice distinctive aspects of this which we experience differently as autistic people, many of which might not be predictable or discernible to our non autistic peers and training facilitators.
Again for this episode we have cut most of the tangential chunks in order to maintain focus for the finished edit, however we may combine all the tangents for a future release!
Thank you for all your support and, as ever, please get in touch with us at [email protected] if you have any comments or reflections you would like to share.
LINKS
Deb Dana & Polyvagal Theory
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This episode chronicles some of Siana’s travel experiences on a recent trip to London with her daughter. We speak about navigating public transport systems, accommodation and orientation.
We highlight things which we find helpful and comforting as autistic people, such as familiar places and foods and building time buffers into our plans. We also focus on the significance of asking for help – both when that goes well and when it doesn’t. We note the anxiety and vulnerability we can experience with cumulative challenges and unpredictable situations.
We have cut out many of the tangents to keep the episode focused on travel aspects but there were many enjoyable and fun times. 😊
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This episode is an exploration of some aspects of empathic communication and connection which may be distinctive for us as autistic people. We notice the significance of this within the contexts of friendship and therapy.
This dialogue also demonstrates some elements of a repair process and how - within a safe relational space - interpersonal dynamics can be discussed without defensiveness.
As ever, we value any feedback you may have - you can reach us at [email protected]
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In this episode we reflect (broadly!) on the concept of having "spiky profiles". This relates to us having aptitudes in some areas and limitations in others, usually where the differences are more pronounced than might be expected in the general population.
As usual, we record without a plan / topic in mind and so there are lots of tangents. We think the authenticity of how we speak in addition to what we say also further demonstrates some of the conundrums of being "spiky" in this way.
We talk about some aspects of our educational histories, noting the unidentified autism and some of the ways in which we have reframed our ways of being nowadays in light of our ongoing personal identification journeys.
Please do feel free to email us at [email protected] if you have any feedback you would like to share. Thank-you so much for being with us and all your support.
LINKS
Fractals
The Piano, Channel 4 (UK)
Spiky profiles
That's The Way I Think by David Grant
Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell
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"Echolalia" might seem like mere mimicry to some but, for many autistic individuals, it's a profound way to connect and communicate. In this episode we challenge the often-pathologised views of echolalia, highlighting its role in creating warmth and fostering joint attention.
Join us as we celebrate the nuances of language, accents, and sensory experiences in autistic communication. Through personal stories and reflections we explore how unconscious speech adaptations and repetitive behaviours provide consistency, creativity and joy.
As well as the similarities in our experiences, this episode also showcases some differences between us in relation to the ways our hyper-connected brain pathways respond to the world. It's always good to be reminded of the old adage "If you know one autistic person, you know one autistic person!"
LINKSRadiolab - Stravinsky's Rite of Spring
Synaptic pruning
ABA PBS - critical article
Neuroclastic - What is ABA?
AMASE - On ‘Positive Behaviour Support’
ABA Kindle book
Francis Bourgeois on TikTok
Francis Bourgeois on Instagram
Francis Bourgeois on YouTube
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The general theme of this episode is gender and sexuality.
As usual we blend personal anecdotes with some theory and reflection. We shine some light on asexuality as an orientation which is often invisible and / or invalidated by both heteronormative and queer communities.
We then discuss the concept of neuroqueering and apply this to our own evolving identities markers and practices. We acknowledge and explore the impact of imposter syndrome and shame on our processes.
This recording is in two parts and the sound quality in the second half is a little different. The fact that it is in two parts means that you will get an in situ insight into the dynamic and ever changing nature of our dialogue.
We reflect on the vulnerability of being transparent in this way, particularly in relation to this topic and with reference to our therapeutic practices. The way in which we do this may actually be "neuroqueering" in the moment?!
Let us know what you think at [email protected] We love to hear from you 💛🧡
LINKS
Photo of Dave Matthews Band
Neuroqueer glossary
Ace & Aro spectrum definitions
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The complexities of food and eating - the latest episode in our occasional mini-series on autistic senses and sensitivities.
You'll hear about our experiences of eating in a range of contexts throughout our lives. We notice the degree of shame and misattunement which is often attached to this - so much so that Siana was too uncomfortable to discuss the topic in any detail until we were actually together in person and needed to eat.
As if in an effort to 'join in' the conversation, Leo's tummy starts rumbling at around 36':30". We were going to try and edit it out, but left its contributions in to honour the "stomach as another brain" theory!
If you would like to connect with us about this topic or anything else, you can reach us at [email protected]. We love to hear from you 🧡💛
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This conversation came out of a few messages we have received around the theme of disclosing our autistic identities.
We discuss our experiences and notice there is often a distinction between our professional and personal lives. We reflect and speculate on why this might be, with particular regard to long standing relationships.
We reference the impact of ableism, recognising that unmasking is both a choice and a political move which unfortunately nowadays is not always safe, helpful or desirable. Yet.
It doesn't stop us doing a podcast though!
We love to hear from you - please get in touch at [email protected] if you would like to join the conversation.
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Ok, so this episode may be a bit niche 😉
Leo has been searching for the perfect socks and he believes he has found them ... (time will tell).
Somehow, Siana's autistic brain tendrils manage to link his fervour with evangelical Christian zeal and she goes down and round about that rabbit warren for a while.
We speak about our own experiences of religion as autistic people and wind up reaching quite a profound moment towards the end when we consider the significance of autistic-to-autistic mirroring on actualisation (becoming truly ourselves).
We considered not releasing this episode but we realised there was quite a lot of internalised NT perceptions driving our concern, namely that it could be seen as "dull" or "boring". So we have overridden that in the interests of authenticity and in the hope that some of you might relate. Enjoy (or skip!!!)
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Leo (still) has Covid. Through this conversation we wind up exploring a drive he has to be useful, to serve.
We notice how this shows up between us and reflect on how it may have developed. We also consider how it might change in the future so that it becomes less of a default and more of a mindful choice.
Along the way you can expect some typical autistic literalism and a discussion about the "Drama Triangle" (roles people play).
LINKS
Karpman's Drama Triangle
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Trigger warning for mention of life threatening scenarios and maternal birthing distress. If you have particular sensitivities around your own experiences of healthcare please consider carefully whether and / or when you might listen to this episode.
We speak about a wide range of our experiences related to being unwell and / or navigating our healthcare needs. This ranges from planned hospital stays to emergency admissions, from managing familiar health needs to circumstances such as giving birth and receiving vaccines.
We notice common autistic idiosyncrasies related to our perceptions of pain and discomfort. We note that many times autistic people are misunderstood and misread, which can have traumatic and isolating effects. We also reflect on self sufficiency and its limitations. And, finally!, we savour the effects of some significant interactions where we have been seen and attended to in ways which felt meaningful and profound.
We weave in some therapeutic chat related to our own communication this week while Leo has been unwell with Covid.----more----LINKS
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