Episodes

  • Allison doesn't want to predict the future and Gabe's facial hair is itching. First, a listener writes in asking for advice on a potential estrangement from a brother and Gabe shares his personal experience. Then, Dr. Nicole Cain joins the show for a gorgeous, gentle and soothing talk about Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and the options for treating trauma somatically. Were Allison and Gabe... "child stars?" And finally, Allison doesn't like Ryan Reynolds.

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  • Allison officially loves witchy stuff. An OP has the perfect revenge for a woman who won't update her phone number. Next, a post prompts a discussion about the worst female protagonists. r/ask poses a question the trio can't resist. Gabe shares some funny name changes and then forgets the rules of Reddit Or Not.

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  • Allison looks like a grown-up girl now. A listener wonders how to help her brother who won't go to therapy despite showing signs of mania again. Next, Meg Appelgate joins the conversation to talk about how the troubled teen industry takes advantage of parents' fears and traumatized kids, including her younger self. And finally, Allison shares what it was like to lose her mom.

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  • Our election anxiety was correct. Then, Mark Ruffalo dreamed his own cancer diagnosis, we talk about taking sneaky photos of celebs at an event, and Gabe drops extensive Colin Jost dating lore. Next, Allison shares a post about a woman who overheard her fiance telling his boys he doesn't wanna get married and decided to let him off the hook. Gabe has an autistic question about why men complain about their wives. Then, cinnamon styrofoam and vanilla pods.

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  • Gabe and Melisa are slap happy up top. Then, a listener writes in asking what to do when her boyfriend's mental health is so poor it's making her life miserable. Next, psychotherapist Israa Nasir joins the podcast to talk about toxic productivity, the push to monetize every hobby, and how poverty, comparison, and hustle culture create more suffering. Hypotheticals is run by Melisa and boy, do we miss Allison. And finally, Melisa's origin story of becoming an expert on soap operas.

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  • Allison’s gone and it’s just the DEI hires from the South today! After a bunch of tangents, we talk r/tipping, where flavors come from and which surprising ones Melisa hates, and a man whose wife is accusing him of fathering her friend’s baby. Then, an OP ends up telling lots of tall tales, and another watches 72 Disney movies. Gabe and Melisa recount their problematic 90s show choir experiences. Could Gabe beat RuPaul in a Drag Race trivia contest?

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  • Gabe pretends to be Allison despite not doing any prep work. A listener writes in after being misled about the openness of a hook up's relationship status. Dr. Lee Airton then joins the chat to talk about all things gender. And finally, is posting strangers online kosher? (Not really!)

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  • Gabe and Melisa carry the torch without Allison. r/amitheasshole tests a friendship group. An important shout out to Lady Gaga for being ahead of the curve. Melisa shares an intricate alien/time travel post that poses some intriguing theories. Gabe discloses some #cool childhood memories. r/paranormal reveals that new construction won't save you from the supernatural. And finally, is there a grief group for ghosts?

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  • Allison's having a lot of water problems. A listener writes in asking if everyone needs to be in therapy even though they've had a hard time with past therapists. Author Jessica Slice then joins the show to talk about disability and dating, and her new book on disabled people being deemed "unfit parents." In Hypotheticals, what is Flurfle? Who is Janet Cilantro? And finally, our favorite songs. Melisa has a list. Gabe has facts about Jason Mraz. Allison only likes lyrics and has a great movie idea that we CAN NOT steal.

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  • Today an OP fucked up by wearing a hat to wash his hair. Then, we talk tattoos, pretzel bites, short haircuts, orange tic tacs, dental work, and writing comedy for others to read. What is this show about exactly? r/nostupidquestions asks why we bother working when we still can’t afford anything? (Welcome, comrade!) Gabe gets on a financial soapbox! Should he go to Peru? In r/accidentalally we see JK Rowling using the singular they and hear a conspiracy theory about transvestigators. Plus what went away without anyone noticing? #nostalgia

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  • Gabe's tracking his hairline and getting shots in the butt. A listener writes in asking if and how they can save a friendship where the other person doesn't seem interested in being friends. Then, Dr. Marie Thouin joins the show to talk about the history of compersion and how it can be used outside of a polyamorous context. And finally, Allison’s book all about Modern Marriage is about to come out! You can preorder it by clicking here!

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  • We debate the heat of the Earth’s core before reading an r/AITH about a husband cheating with and impregnating the couple’s surrogate. Should the wife give up her parental rights? Then, a man complains that the woman he left his wife for is not a good girlfriend. Then we explore r/wellthatsucks and r/hypotheticalsituations for gas station antics, getting millions to go back to school Billy Madison style, and choosing to get ears and a tail, master pizza chef skills or 20 dollars. (It makes sense in context, we promise.) Finally, what would you do if you found your maid of honor shit talking you on Facebook right before the wedding?

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  • It's a talking episode baby! No guest—other than Gabe's dog Beans. A listener writes in wanting advice on what to do now that their estranged father is sick. Melisa joins for Hypotheticals where a "no kissing" clause constitutes cheating. The trio debate their 4 favorite movies. (Allison's husband also weighs in.) And finally, conscious celibacy, whatever that means.

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  • This week, would you shake an evil politician’s hand if you had to? Would you livestream your life for 10 years for 10 million dollars a year? Would you lie and tell a cheating partner you were also cheating to save face? Plus, good comebacks, presidential trivia, and sand pies.

    Correction: Gabe says the band who asked for NO brown M&Ms was Metallica. It was in fact Van Halen. Our apologies to Mr. Eddie Van Halen.

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  • If Sugar the dog wanted to? She would. A lesbian listener writes in upset that she has to miss out on events with her closeted girlfriend's religious family. Author of Sexism & Sensibility Jo-Ann Finkelstein joins the pod to discuss how to speak to your children about sexism. Allison then gives Gabe and Jo-Ann one of Gabe's favorite hypotheticals ever. And finally, Allison finally has a hobby! It's swimming!

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  • Allison is on a permanent Grecian vacation of the mind, while Gabe almost ruins it with gender dysphoria for cis people. Gabe presents Allison and Melisa with a conundrum from a sex and love addicts subreddit. A delusional driver with road rage doesn't understand car insurance. An OP in r/dreams asks for dream help because they spent 30 years inside a dream. What is the funniest or weirdest thing a doctor has ever said to you? People in r/AskReddit share what clued them into their partner being "a fucking idiot."

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  • Gabe explains how to use the term "punk" to Allison. A listener writes in wondering if it's a bad idea to not get a roommate post-separation (and spend more money) so she can live alone for her mental health. Next, the host of "Big Lash Energy" Jayna Marie joins the show to share a rollercoaster story about getting destroyed by the internet for an affair...that never happened. This is BANANAS. And finally, on-screen chemistry. Who has it? Who definitely does not?

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  • Gabe teaches Allison about actor Daniel Day Lewis. Melisa wants to cobble shoes. r/OddlySpecific features an OP who is interested in hiring a hitman. A kid with a horrible stepmom exposes her insane rules on r/teenagers. r/readitonwiki features a bride who wonders if she was wrong to reseat her exhibitionist sister during her wedding ceremony. And finally, building guitars from scratch!

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  • Content Warning: Suicide

    Gabe wants to be Ryan Gosling in "The Fall Guy" and has a long overdue shoutout for a fan on the Patreon. A listener writes in wondering how to have a relationship with the one person they want to be with after feeling responsible for someone else's suicide. Somatic therapist Karden Rabin joins to talk about the differences from talk therapy and why it's important to feel your feelings and confront what's going on in the body. And finally, dominant masculinity, Jerry Seinfeld and alpha male boot camps.

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  • Puzzles are not for Allison or Melisa. r/prorevenge brings us the story of Bob The Builder who can't build a house. r/millennials features a thank you from a Gen Z OP. r/bestofredditupdates is full of twists and turns that might end a marriage. And finally, your birthday party isn't unique enough.

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