Episodes
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I want to start with a quick content warning: today we’re talking about grief, specifically the death of a parent. If this is a vulnerable topic for you, this might be an episode to skip or listen to with care.
I’ve been feeling the pull to record an episode on grieving while running your business for a while now, mainly because this has been so prominent in my own business, and I haven’t found much content that speaks to it.
This isn’t going to be an episode where I teach you how to smash your business goals despite your grief – in my experience, that’s just not how it works. For me, making space to care for myself while grieving is the main thing that has allowed me to balance the work that that I love, which sustains me and my family, with the very personal processes and emotions around losing a loved one.
Listen in for a nuanced conversation on what it’s like to find balance in times of loss, and the unavoidably practical side of trying to slow down in a world that keeps moving.
If you have experience with anything discussed in this episode, I’m sending lots of love your way.
QUOTES
"Sometimes things do fall out of the sky when we weren't expecting it. And that's really scary. But rather than working on all the ways you'll manage it, try to work on looking at the things you can control. One of the main things you can control is believing that you will cope."
"This doesn't have to be the year you smash it. What if this is the year that you coast? What if this is the year where you get by and it's okay? If I'd been honest about that in the moment, I actually think I'd have made more money ironically, because I think I'd have made a plan for a coasting me, not a smashing it me."
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Get ready, cause this one’s a deep dive! Doctor Asher Larmie joins me in this episode of Real You Real Money to talk through the intricacies of gender identity, gender conditioning, and what it all means not only when you’re navigating your business, but the world.
Asher is a transmasculine doctor now working independently with clients to combat weight stigma and promote weight-inclusive care. Together, we dive into the complicated nuances between the very personal side of gender identity, and how it relates to the larger social conditioning and often arbitrary expectations we place on people based on the gender they’re born into. Bringing both of our experiences to the table, this conversation is mainly about what it means to be socially conditioned as female.
You can find out more about Asher at https://www.fatdoctor.co.uk/
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Missing episodes?
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This week I’m welcoming Joeli Caparco to the podcast! Joeli is a brilliant coach who helps people reconnect with their needs, wants, and desires so that they can have happier, healthier relationships.
Together we unpack the complexities of how money-making plays into, and sometimes determines the dynamics of our marriages and relationships. Fair warning, it’s a maze of conditioning, a healthy dose of grey area, and a whole lot of self (re)discovery!
Stay tuned as Joeli shares her own story of a dysfunctional money dynamic within her previous marriage, and how she created a new family balance that made room for the work that she’s passionate about and the moneymaking possibilities that come with it.
You can find out more about Joeli’s work at
queercyclecoach.com
@joelicaparco
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If you’re up to date with coaching industry trends, you may have noticed a big uptick in ‘do it my way’ marketing - people selling the one solution that will skyrocket your business to success. If you’re a long time listener, you may have already guessed that I’m NOT a fan of one size fits all solutions.
In this episode, I’m diving into the mentality that leads people to lean on step by step techniques, how these methods are rooted in scarcity, and the mindset alternatives that will provide much more longevity and ease to your money making. Tune in for tips on how to gain a deeper understanding of your business beliefs and where they come from, plus how to use these to be a discerning consumer of advice and coaching.
QUOTES
"My very first discovery of Mindset was mindblowing to me, this concept that I had control over my brain, that I didn't just have to accept these thoughts and beliefs that didn't feel like they fit me. I got to choose my beliefs about myself rather than just feeling like I was a victim to them."
"There's a need for control, a need for steadiness - because we don't have it, we're trying to create it. What we really need for that stability is to find it internally, and mindset work is part of a way that we can do that."
"Group coaching is an amazing thing when it comes to money because one of the biggest things holding us back from feeling good about money is shame. One of the key ways that we remove shame is by sharing in groups, by understanding that we're not alone."
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I'm thrilled to welcome Nicola to the podcast! As a Coach, Coach Trainer, Certified Coach Supervisor, and experienced Creative Strategist, Nicola takes a strategic yet heart-centered approach, creating holistic solutions by examining the bigger picture and understanding how the various systems of our society intersect.
In this episode, Nicola shares how her experiences have shaped her approach to ambition, both within and outside of money-making. Tune in for valuable advice on taking a holistic approach to ambition, its impact on everything from sales to daily life, and what it means to balance the personal, professional, and beyond.
You can find Nicola at:
https://www.alifemoreinspired.com/
Or on Instagram @nicolaraewickham
QUOTES
‘I think in line with looking at ambition is looking at our definitions of success. For me, a definition of success is being able to do the school runs. That is very personal and that's a definition of success, as well as income goals being a definition of success, as well as being able to go on adventures. Whatever it is, there are these bigger ones and these smaller ones.”
“What has worked before isn’t going to work going forward
“I have learned that I can really trust my business and I can really trust my work. I can trust myself. Life can be happening and things can be going on and with the right support, you can still show up and deliver.”
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My guest today is Claire Paniccia, a brilliant business coach helping neurodivergent, spoonie, and creative rebel online entrepreneurs figure out how to do business (and make money) in ways that work for THEM.
Claire and I walk through the unique layout of moneymaking when you’re neurodiverse, from the limits of corporate life to finding your footing in self-employment and everything in between.
Tune in for insight on how running your own business can expand your earning potential, how to get your business to work for you, plus some really helpful tips on how to balance fluctuating energy levels with income consistency.
On Jul 22nd - Jul 25th, Claire is hosting a free 4-day online event to help you toss out the “rules” and build your online business to work for YOUR unique brain.
https://raydodd--conqueryourcontent.thrivecart.com/nd-summit/ (This is an affiliate link, I was a speaker last year and can promise that this is one not to miss!)
QUOTES
“What was a successful, functional, proven path for someone else might not be a successful path for you. Let's say they had really good hiking shoes, and you have flip flops for the brain. Your flip flop brain is not going to do well on the hiking path that they used cleats on.”
“I love an unregulated industry because there's so much opportunity without gatekeeping. But a flip side of that coin is that there are gross opportunists. It’s kind of baby with the bathwater.”
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Today we’re debunking the myth that there are certain times of the year that you just can’t make money. So many of my clients stress about quiet summer months— lots of people even think it’s a given that they won’t make any sales in August. I want you to know that’s just not true.
Tune in for a breakdown of the reason that you have such low expectations for summer sales, and how to challenge this in a way that could turn August into your best month of the year.
Interested in a free masterclass to boost your sales? Sign up for three simple steps here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/masterclass
QUOTES
“Think about what your clients want and stay out of their pockets and their diaries and their holiday plans and their rest plans and how much time they should spend with their kids.”
“Don't be afraid to gamify it. In fact, do it. Money doesn't need to be treated so heavily and seriously all the time. In fact, it loves not to be. So how can you make it lighter?”
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Today we’re joined by brilliant photographer and business owner Éadaoin Curtin!
Éadaoin’s specialises in branding photography with her business Firechild Photography, and has a fresh and encouraging perspective on how to put your face to your brand. Her approach is backed by years of connecting with entrepreneurs and bringing the most authentic reflection of themselves to the surface.
Tune in for talk on the pressures of being visible— literally — the revelations that happen when you are free of the male gaze, and the conditioning we challenge whenever we have our photo taken.
You can find out more about Éadaoin at:
https://firechildphotography.com/
@ firechildphotography
And if you’re catching this episode on 6 June, you’re JUST in time to sign up to Plenty! You can find all the info here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/plenty
QUOTES
“None of my clients are getting the photos taken because they want to promote how they look. It's because they want to promote how they work, what they do, how they can help you. The body that they are in is important…and irrelevant.”
“In being the real you, people will be attracted to you. If you’re actively trying to blend in with all the other coaches, you just become one of a crowd. That's the countercultural aspect of showing up in front of the camera as yourself.”
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The brilliant Asher Larmie joins me today to talk about combatting scarcity, prioritising accessibility, and learning to embrace making the money you desire.
Asher is an educator and advocate combatting weight stigma and promoting weight-inclusive care. They offer courses, books and masterclasses that empower you on your health journey without all the toxic weight loss nonsense.
Asher is part of my money program Plenty, and has had huge success in doubling their income within the space of 6 months. We walk through that journey together, starting with how to challenge money stories carried through generations, facing the unique finances of being self-employed, and embracing a sense of community to lead you through it all.
This episode is for you if you’re interested in how to challenge your conditioning around money… and so is Plenty! Doors are now open to join, with full information on the program and community and a link to sign up right here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/plenty.
For more information on working with Asher, check out
@thefatdoctor
https://www.fatdoctor.co.uk/
QUOTES
"I didn't realise just how much that was passed down, I didn't realise it massively impacts how I live my entire life, in the fear that money could just disappear at any moment in time."
"It felt like one of my deepest, darkest secrets. How dare I admit that I not only want to earn money, but I think I can and maybe should earn money. "
"The whole point of this community is that...we are forming a resistance almost. We are here to support each other, but also to help each other to fight back."
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'It costs that much cause it takes me f***ing hours…' If you sang this lyric in your head then you’ve probably heard of Laura Jane Barnes, who joins us in today’s episode!
Of course, Laura Jane is more than just a viral song maker (which we’ll get into in the pod). She is a business strategist who helps artists and handmade business owners turn their social media efforts into an engaged and loyal online following.
Tune in as Laura and I talk through why visibility as a small business owner is more essential than you think, how to establish trust with your following, and why the algorithm isn’t your enemy.
For more about Laura Jane, go to:
https://www.laurajanebarnes.com/
Or follow @heyitslaurajane
And if you’re interested in making your own impact online, join the waitlist for Plenty right here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/plenty
QUOTE
'When it comes to like artists and hand makers and stuff like that, I see a lot of “I don't want to be a content creator. I don't want to be a personal brand’ … Well, you don't have to be, but your journey is going to be more difficult. Because the reason that someone buys from a small business owner over a huge company is that personal connection.'
'I think the other thing with showing up is that people assume that in order to be visible that you have to give up your privacy, and I don't think that's the case. It's not about letting strangers in, it's about letting yourself out.'
'This is the main piece with engagement that so many people are missing: you need to give people an opportunity to share themselves, their values, their opinions, their experiences, their preferences, because people want to talk about themselves…. Then you'll find that people actually start building friendships within your comment section.'
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If you’re running an independent business, it is almost impossible to avoid thinking about the current economy and how it’s effecting sales. I’ve seen so many people preparing for the worst, closing down their small businesses, or simply adjusting to the change in the market while looking back at the ‘e-commerce pandemic boom’ as a thing of the past.
It’s a lot to take in. And the good news is, you do have control over a lot of how you move forward. That’s why today, I’m breaking down the misconceptions and misunderstandings about how something like a recession, a cost of living crisis, or an economic downturn can impact our businesses, and what we can do about it.
QUOTES
“There has never been more ways to make this work, even though what we're being told is that there's never been less ways.”
“If somebody chooses to work with you, you have to trust them. It's not your business to decide who should or shouldn't be working with you or how people should or shouldn't spend their money.”
“People do get more discerning when there is this general scarcity in the air. It’s a bit chicken and egg.”
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I’m returning after a little hiatus, and with me is the brilliant Lauren Currie!
Lauren is the Founder of UPFRONT, and is on a mission to change confidence for 1 million women. An all-around powerhouse, Lauren has been awarded an OBE for her services to design and diversity.
Together we look at visibility from all angles, especially the ones that are trickier to navigate. From the positives of learning to own your work and show up as yourself, to the less explored complexity of privacy, safety, and pressure, we break down what it really means for people from all walks of life to show up online.
Ever notice how visibility is an ‘obligation’ that seems to fall on female business owners? Then this episode is for you…
You can find out more about Lauren here:
https://laurencurrie.co/
https://www.weareupfront.com/
QUOTES
“You can be private and authentic at the same time.”
“I think with female founders, the world wants to know everything about you. It's like: I'm going to decide if I'm your customer or not based on where you live, who you're in a relationship with, how you parent. I think it’s risky and we're only just starting to scratch the surface of what the consequences are for the women in these positions.”
“When you end up with a life that's so different to the life that you came from, how do you keep progressing?”
“Why do I need to be camera ready every day when I'm trying to actually build a business? I look at male founders in the same position as me and they are not doing that.”
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Today I’m taking a look back at the journey from the start of my business to where I am today. I’m currently revamping my own messaging and funnels, which has turned out to be a great chance to reflect on all of the experiences, inspirations, and even pitfalls that that are at the heart of my offers.
Listen in to hear about how and why I started my business, the circumstances that led me to the self-trust I needed to jump in with both feet, and how you can do the same no matter where you’re at.
If you caught the shoutout at the beginning of the episode, the undeniably brilliant Tamu Thomas just released her first book ‘Women Who Work Too Much’. Check it out here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Women-Who-Work-Too-Much/dp/1837820740
And if you’re interested in the upcoming round of Plenty, be sure to get on the waitlist: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/plenty
QUOTES
“I realised how much easier it was for me to make money when I decided to trust myself. When I decided to do things in ways that felt good to me, that is when it worked.
“I don't care what people think of me being visible. I need to feed my family. That was a far more pressing concern than: what does so and so think of me being visible? Am I annoying these people?”
“I don't want you to have to hit a rock bottom experience in order to be able to act on your zones of genius or your deep desires. That was my story, but it doesn't need to be your story”
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I’ve had a breakthrough around how I manage my days, and ultimately how I manage my business... so of course I wanted to share it with you!
There is so much focus on starting out in your business, but what happens once the excitement, the adrenaline, and even a little bit of fear has worn off?
In a counterproductive way, I realised that I started replicating the very corporate structures that I started a business to get away from - things like equating being at my desk to productivity. These habits felt safe as they are familiar, but they certainly weren't productive or healthy.
Tune in for advice on how to break out and run your business and time in a way that works for you.
QUOTES
“We talk a lot about starting up, but we don't really talk about the ebbs and flows of running a business for a long time.” “I was trying to replicate the working habits of being in an office…when part of the point of having my own business is not working within a system that doesn’t work for me!"
"I’ve found new ways of splitting my day up so I get more done, and don’t feel obligated to be tied to my desk...I am so much happier because I don't feel like I'm having to sacrifice one part of my life for the other.”
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Today, we’re chatting about safety, familiarity, trust, and how all of these things come together to build the foundation of your business.
Running your own business means that you are likely reinventing typical structures, whether it’s in your sales, your offers, or even your day to day. You are at the centre of it all, and while that is super freeing in theory, it can be a challenge in times of doubt.
When we have to make big decisions or take risks, our brain’s instinct is to search for safety in the familiar. So what happens when we enter the uncharted territory of our new, play-by-our-own-rules business? Tune in for a discussion on how to avoid outsourcing your trust, and making decisions based on what you know instead of what you fear.
Interested in joining Plenty? Get on the waitlist here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/plenty
QUOTES
“We are so worried about drowning – about it all going wrong – that we are like squirming with our legs, working frantically to stop drowning, when actually we can just put our feet on the floor.”
“The role of your subconscious is to make sure that you are safe. So it is asking without you consciously being aware of it in every situation: is this familiar? If it's familiar, I'll read it as safe.”
“I have to look at what is true, what I know, what I can touch. Not what I fear is true.”
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Today we’re talking about how the people around you impact the kind of money you can make. From the influences you absorbed growing up, to clients’ opinions on affordability, to the type of businesses you aspire toward, it seems like you can’t turn a corner without someone else’s money beliefs jumping out to inform or challenge your own.
So how do we surround ourselves with money beliefs that will build us up and help us make the money we desire? Tune in for insight on the importance of a supportive money community, plus more on the unique inherited challenges that those of us historically left out of moneymaking face.
QUOTES
“I do think making money is harder for people who've traditionally been left out of money making. Imagine the people not in the cigar room drinking the brandy. The mental gymnastics that we have to do, the unravelling of the conditioning is broader and louder.”
“One of the reasons communities are so impactful is we share power. We share power in communities. We share information, we share mistakes and failures. We share wins, we share wobbles,
“Making more money is vulnerable. It's so vulnerable. And you do not need to hold that alone.”
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In this episode, I’m breaking down why your money mindset is directly linked to your sales. You may not realise it when you’re writing that sales email or editing that reel, but how you show up and sell in your business is directly related to how you feel about money, your potential to make it, and the role it plays in your life… not to mention in the world.
Tune in for insights on how improving your money mindset can help you meet your sales goals, plus lots more on taking up space and giving ourselves permission to sell.
And remember, Sell That Thing starts on February 12! Here’s the link with all the info: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/sell-that-thing
QUOTES
“My view on selling is that you are inviting people into your world, and yes there's an exchange of money in there, but the exchange of money is not the thing.”
“You're also gonna want to figure out how to sell without compromising who you are so that the whole of you gets to show up in selling. When you do that, you are going to attract the best fit people for you.”
“We often conflate selling and unkindness. People feel like the more they go out and sell, somehow they're adding more bad to the world... You are adding good to the world, really falling in love with what you do in terms of making the world a better place.”
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In this episode, I’m jumping into some sticky money territory… even for this podcast!
I work with so many clients that are incredibly conscious of the ethics of their money making. If you’re a listener, it’s likely that you fall into this category of beautifully big-hearted business owners!
While there’s obviously so many good things about striving for an ethical business, there are moments where your conditioning around money can masquerade as kindness and keep you from entering that big moneymaking space that you long to fill.
Tune in for the sideways lessons we can learn from ‘unethical money makers’, and how we can embrace the many definitions of an asset that don’t have to do with ownership.
QUOTES
“Sometimes I think our worry, our moralizing, our over commitment to what's ethical and what's not ethical is holding us back in ways it does not need to.”
“We need to put a little more thought in than ‘this feels not right’. We need to think more critically than that. Sometimes the ick is legit, and sometimes the ick is social conditioning in disguise, and it's keeping us broke.”
“The way that we've been conditioned is to believe that what money touches becomes bad or unkind is super interesting, because if we were just talking about community and we weren't thinking about what that community paying us, we wouldn't have these same thoughts. When we introduce selling (to a community), our footing becomes unstable and we don't really know what's okay anymore.”
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The idea of selling is one of the most common points of anxiety for coaches and independent business owners – who do we approach? How do we share our offers? How hard do we push? How do we deal with rejection? With a maybe?
Sales consultant Leah Gregory joins me to hash out these questions and more. We talk through those moments where sales get sticky, and the steps we can take to make selling less pressured and more about connection.
Leah works with 6 & 7 figure coaches to sell high ticket offers, lead and train their sales teams, and help them make more sales and help more people. You can find out more about Leah on IG at @iamleah.co.uk
Interested in joining me for a whole course on getting comfortable with selling? Read all about Sell That Thing here: https://www.raydodd.co.uk/sell-that-thing
QUOTES
“People write themselves off or they discount themselves from ever being the kind of person that can sell because they're like identity currently feels so far away from that… (instead) I believe we’ve unlearned the ability to sell ourselves.”
‘Sometimes “I can't afford it” is the easiest way to say no without saying no. It can be “I don't want to hurt your feelings because you're lovely, but I don't really understand how this offer fits into the context of my life.’
‘When it comes to sales, we want to get down to the granular. It's having this particular problem with this particular aspect of self-worth. So when I make an invitation, it's going to be based on that.’
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I need to rant. Right before I recorded this podcast, I watched my husband experience an awful sales call with an online coach in his industry. The thing that made this call especially bad was that it was a freebie consultation that ended in a HUGE amount of pressure to buy… which is exactly what I’m here to talk about today.
When we offer free value – whether it’s a 1:1 call or our everyday content – we need to be very aware of what the intention is behind it. Our own conditioning around scarcity can crop up when it’s time to share your offer, which it’s why it’s important to work through your money stuff so that you can focus your sales on your clients and the value they’ll get. Tune in for more on how!
QUOTES
‘I'm not saying everybody who offers a strategy call for free is lying. What I'm saying is when you go on it and they're not actually giving you anything useful, trust is broken.’
“There’s the squirmy feelings, the way in which we get a client on a call or a customer in our emails and we feel like “If they don't buy, no one else is coming”. When we get those feelings, we need to address (why we’re) not trusting clients to make decisions for themselves.”
“We need to address our money stuff for other people, for our clients and customers so that they get to have a clean experience, a clean exchange when it comes to money with us.”
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