Episodes
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This week here at Sex in Space we’re re-releasing one of our episodes from 2023. In this podcast, Jane had the privilege of sitting down with Dr. Laurie Mintz, an author, therapist, speaker and emeritus professor, to talk tips for a better sex life.
Dr Laurie is more than qualified to speak on this topic, as the author of two popular press books: Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters and How to Get It, and A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex: Reclaim Your Desire and Reignite Your Relationship. These books were written with the aim of empowering women sexually and they both have published studies demonstrating that readers enhance their sexual functioning.
Dr Laurie aims to provide scientifically accurate, sex-positive information to enhance female pleasure. She gives presentations and workshops to professionals and lay audiences, and has a TEDx talk that’s received more than 2.5 million views.
Together, she and Jane spoke about what causes women to have low libidos, the two types of desire (and why you should know them), what the orgasm gap is and why it exists, the truth about sex positions, the issue with penis-size jokes and practical takeaways for a better sex life.
Find Dr. Laurie’s website here: https://www.drlauriemintz.com/
Watch Dr. Laurie’s TEDx talk here: https://youtu.be/oD2ja2BT-0E?si=e_qwyGySYx7GXRWg
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
03:15 – Why Laurie wrote her first book
04:53 – What causes women to have low libidos?
07:31 – The two types of desire (and why you should know them)
09:10 – Why we need to rethink the way we talk about sex
14:59 – How reading Dr. Laurie’s book can improve your sex life
17:04 – Shame and sex are enemies
18:44 – What inspired Dr. Laurie to start educating about the clitoris
20:37 – What is the orgasm gap and why does it exist?
23:03 – The need for porn literacy
25:19 – Why sex ed in the Netherlands is so effective
26:42 – The truth about sex positions
29:53 – Why women have pain with penetration (and what you can do about it)
32:50 – Why do women fake orgasm?
34:42 – The issue with slut-shaming and penis size jokes
36:07 – What does it mean to be sexually active?
37:37 – Dr Laurie’s communication tips
41:34 – Why it’s important to learn how to pleasure yourself
43:53 – 12 commandments for a better sex life
46:05 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this week’s episode of the podcast, we have a special bonus episode – thirteen of our top tips from experts on how to have a better sex life. We’ll cover things like how you can use responsive desire to feel aroused – and why taking time to build arousal is so important, how to bring variety into your sex life, advice on how to give and receive feedback with a sexual partner, and more.
Our experts include:
Dr Laurie Mintz: author, speaker, therapist and emeritus professor, whose life’s work has been committed to helping people live more authentic, meaningful, joyful—and sexually satisfying—lives.
Melody Thomas: creator and host of The Good Sex Project – a podcast about good sex, good relationships and how to have them.
Dr Ian Kerner: licensed psychotherapist and nationally recognized sex therapist who works with individuals and couples on a range of relational issues that often lead to distress.
Susan Bratton: intimacy expert to millions, who is known as an ‘orgasmanaut’ and is an advocate for all those who desire intimacy and passion their whole life long.
Damian Weatherald: disability advocate and inclusivity consultant, sex educator, and sex toy guru.
Dr Jenn Gunsaullus: keynote speaker, sociologist, sex coach, and author of From Madness to Mindfulness: Reinventing Sex for Women.
Suzanne Werder: nurse practitioner from the New Zealand Sexual Health Society.
Hollie McNish: award-winning poet, writer and performer.
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:36 – How to use responsive desire to feel aroused
01:25 – How to give and receive feedback with a sexual partner
02:06 – Why it’s important to take time to build arousal
03:15 – How to practice self-advocacy in non-sexual situations
03:57 – Why you should embrace laughter in sexual experiences
04:40 – How trying something new in bed can help build intimacy
05:14 – How we can reframe the way we think about condoms
05:48 – Use a hand massage to practice communication
07:02 – Why it’s important to treat others how they want to be treated
07:42 – Why you should be asking questions in bed
09:03 – Why it’s important not to rush into sex
10:54 – How to bring variety into your sex life
13:33 – How to prioritise your own pleasure
14:17 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Missing episodes?
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On today’s episode of the podcast, Toshi had a conversation with Ella D’Aloia. Ella is a certified holistic sex coach and therapeutic yoni massage practitioner who specialises in female sexuality. Together, Ella and Toshi spoke all about yoni massage - what it is, what the benefits are, what to expect from a session and how to find the right practitioner. They also had a conversation about how through her intimate and supportive approach, Ella helps women to reclaim their bodies, pleasure and sexuality so they can live a life filled with joy, pleasure and aliveness.
Find Ella here: https://www.ella-daloia.com/
Or check her out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ella_daloia_/
TIMESTAMPS:
00:00 – Intro
00:46 – How Ella got started in this space
02:46 – What is a yoni massage?
05:39 – What are the benefits of a yoni massage?
11:57 – How many sessions does a person need?
14:50 – Is yoni massage sexual?
17:18 – Why you need to do your research into yoni massage practitioners
18:20 – How does Ella create a safe space for clients to feel comfortable?
19:34 – What can you expect from a yoni massage session with Ella?
23:05 – Standout client experiences for Ella
25:44 – What Ella has learned from her work as a yoni massage practitioner
28:57 – Ella's message if you’re feeling hesitant about getting a yoni massage
30:27 – Can you have a yoni massage if you’re on your period?
31:44 – Why it’s so important to be connected to our bodies
33:22 – Where listeners can find Ella and her work
33:55 – Is there a version of yoni massage for men?
35:06 – How you can check if a practitioner is certified
37:12 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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In this episode, Tim had the opportunity to speak with Dr. Niobe Way about the social and emotional lives of young boys and men.
Dr. Niobe Way is an internationally recognised NYU developmental psychologist who has spent nearly 40 years researching social and emotional development and has found that boys and young men desperately want and need the same thing as everyone else: close friendships. Yet they and we grow up in a stereotyped “boy” culture, one that devalues and mocks those relationships, rather than recognising that they’re necessary for human survival. Her social science research has made her an expert on friendships, loneliness, teenagers, gender stereotypes, masculinity and the roots of violence.
In this conversation, Dr. Way shares insights from her latest book, ‘Rebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves and Our Culture’. She explains how these “rebels,” as she calls the boys and young men in her research and in her classrooms, teach us about their and our crisis of connection, evidence of which is visible in our soaring rates of depression, anxiety, loneliness, suicide, and mass violence. They also teach us about the solutions to the crisis, which is to care, to listen with curiosity, and to take individual and collective responsibility for the damage we have done to them, to ourselves, and to the world around us.
Find Dr. Way here: https://www.niobe-way.com/
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 – Intro
01:26 – How Dr. Way got started researching boys and their friendships
03:57 – The four themes she learned from young men
10:56 – Close: the movie about boy friendships
12:08 – Which men are most at risk of suffering from this crisis of connection?
16:38 – What Dr. Way means when she refers to ‘boy’ culture
17:20 – Why curiosity is key to connecting with others
21:29 – Dr. Way’s advice for parents
24:06 – The impact of technology and how we use it on ‘boy’ culture
26:07 – How we could change technology to connect better with others
28:15 – Having feelings is normal for everyone
33:41 – Why ‘boy’ culture is not just about masculinity
38:40 – Society tolerates our ‘soft sides’ more when we’re younger
39:37 – What we can learn from listening to children and teenagers
43:02 – Why this book is not Dr. Way’s opinion
45:25 – Dr. Way’s hopes moving forward
49:11 – Why Dr. Way focused her work on boys and young men
50:32 – Where to find more of Dr. Niobe Way
52:54 – Outro
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this week’s episode, Toshi had the opportunity to talk again with Kate Muir, a women’s health expert, investigative journalist, documentary maker, and author of books on the menopause and the pill. Together they had a conversation all about the menopause and Kate’s book, Everything you needed to know about the menopause but were too afraid to ask.
Kate and Toshi discussed the difference between perimenopause and menopause, the impact of the menopause on mental and physical health, the role of hormone replacement therapy (HRT), and what young people should know about the menopause.
Find more of Kate here: https://katemuir.co.uk/
Check her out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/menoscandal/?hl=en
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:35 – Kate's story with the menopause
03:29 – The difference between perimenopause and menopause
06:56 – The impact of the menopause on physical and mental health
10:10 – How does hormone replacement therapy work for the menopause?
13:24 – Is there a relationship between hormone replacement therapy and breast cancer?
15:39 – Societal attitudes towards HRT
21:34 – The accessibility of health knowledge
23:18 – How women's relationship to menopause has changed over time
25:22 – Why so many women suddenly put on weight in midlife
27:37 – Osteoporosis, bone density and HRT
32:30 – The impact of hormones on Alzheimer's and dementia
36:34 – Why we need to be getting hormones to all those who need it
38:35 – What young people should know about the menopause
40:15 – The rewiring of the brain during the menopause
42:45 – The impact of AI on accessibility of science
45:36 – Kate’s new book, How to have a magnificent midlife crisis
48:07 – Advice to people wanting to support someone going through the menopause
50:30 – Where to find more of Kate’s work
51:28 - Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On today’s episode, we were joined by Dr David Perl, a qualified expert on limerence. Growing up with a father who survived Auschwitz and a mother facing frustration and anger as a stay-at-home mum, David’s path to success was anything but ordinary. Seeking the approval of his parents, he pursued a career in medicine, graduating from the prestigious University of London in 1984. Exploring various disciplines within medicine, including psychiatry and aviation medicine, he eventually founded docleaf, a renowned Crisis Management and Trauma Psychology Consultancy. Along the way, he acquired expertise in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, counselling, and even earned an advanced postgraduate diploma in Leadership Coaching. However, it was his own personal experience of developing limerence in 2010 that ignited a new purpose for David. Determined to help others impacted by limerence, he founded limerence.net, a platform that includes a supportive forum to aid individuals on their healing journey. Together, Toshi and David had a conversation all about limerence – what it is, who is impacted by it, and ways to deal with it.
Check out Dr David’s site here: https://limerence.net/
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
02:32 – David's experience with limerence
05:29 – What is limerence?
07:10 – Why do people get limerence?
10:14 – Advice for someone dealing with limerence
11:26 – How can we get over limerence?
13:37 – Limerence and affairs
15:13 – Can limerence turn into love?
16:43 – David’s key tips for getting over limerence
19:47 – Should you tell your limerent object about your feelings?
22:46 – Why self-compassion is so important if you’re struggling with limerence
26:44 – Understanding male and female friendships
32:01 – Limerence is a symptom
33:45 – Where you can find more of David
35:21 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this episode of the podcast, we were lucky enough to be joined by Amal Awad. Amal is a writer, director and performer, and as a journalist has contributed to publications including The Guardian, The Sydney Morning Herald, ELLE and Frankie. She’s produced and presented for ABC Radio National, and is the author of eight books, both fiction and non-fiction.
Together, Amal and Jane had a conversation about the complexity of the experience of wearing a veil, and the personal and societal pressures that play into this. They spoke about modesty and the policing women’s bodies in society, as well as the contrasts between wearing the veil in the Western world compared to in the Arab world. Amal and Jane also had a discussion about female sexuality and education around sex and bodies.
Find Amal here: https://amalawad.com/
Read 'Beyond Veiled Clichés': https://amzn.asia/d/bOs4xPc
Watch ABC Australia’s video, Why Muslim women wear a hijab, burka or niqab & the importance of modesty in Islam: https://youtu.be/hkLjExxCQdY?si=piVVLOL-uLBCT5me
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 – Intro
00:41 – How does Amal’s work connect with Sex in Space?
02:23 – The need for nuanced conversations about the veil
06:51 – Amal’s experience wearing a headscarf
11:22 – The policing of women and their bodies
15:08 – The veil and symbolism
19:16 – The difference between belief and faith
22:57 – Wearing the veil in the Arab world vs the Western world
26:23 – Female sexuality and religion
32:24 – Understanding the lack of education around sex and bodies
35:07 – Different expressions of modesty
38:54 – Why Amal chose to stop wearing the headscarf
43:25 – About Amal’s book: Bitter and Sweet
49:16 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On today’s episode of the podcast, we were joined by Arielle Zadok. Arielle is an intimacy coordinator, sexologist and founder of The Sexy Directory, an upcoming sex education platform launching in 2025. When she’s not facilitating intimacy on film and television sets, you can find her leading transformative intimacy workshops and speaking about sensuality, sexuality and intimacy at events. Arielle also hosts and produces Birds & Bees Don’t Fck, a show that normalizes how sex education of the past failed us, and how we all managed to get through that. Each week she brings on a comedian or sexpert for these fun, free flowing, educational conversations.
Together, Arielle and Tim had a conversation about the role of intimacy coordinators in film and television, the responsibility of media creators to portray sex and intimacy in an authentic way, what makes a great sex scene, and the impact that misinformation from places like pornography has on real sexual interactions.
Find Arielle here: https://www.ariellezadok.com/
Follow her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ariellezadok
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
01:39 – The state of sex ed
03:53 – Arielle’s early interest in sex and sexuality
08:20 – How Arielle got started as an intimacy coordinator
13:59 – The need to portray intimacy in an accurate way
17:53 – What does a good sex scene look like?
20:12 – Intimacy coordination and kink
23:10 – What Fifty Shades of Grey got wrong about kink
30:18 – Does intimacy coordination exist in pornography?
34:35 – The problem with using porn as a form of sex ed
37:00 – Where we should be learning about sex from
39:05 – How messages about shame and masturbation impact our sex lives
44:13 – Education and The Sexy Directory
49:49 – Where to find Arielle
50:27 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this week’s episode of the podcast, we have a special bonus episode – ten of our top parenting sex ed tips from experts. We’ve spoken with a lot of parenting experts on our podcast over the years and we wanted to put together some of our favourite tips from these conversations. We’ll cover things like how to talk with your kids about consent, masturbation and porn, advice for how you can be the kind of parent your kids feel safe to come to – and why that’s so important – as well as how you can respond, rather than react, when they ask you a tricky question.
00:00 – Intro
00:34 – Make it normal for your kids to talk to you about what they see online
02:07 – Why you don’t want to shame kids for their bodily reactions to sexual content
03:10 – Be the go to place for your kids to learn facts and values, rather than the media/porn
04:06 – Think about helpful sex conversations you've had in your own life
05:27 – Why your tone matters even more than what you say when having sex talks with your kids
06:20 – How to talk with kids about masturbation
06:59 – How to explain to kids how babies are made
09:28 – How to talk with your kids about porn
10:50 – How to teach kids about consent
12:12 – How to respond rather than react when your child asks you a tricky sex question
14:26 – Conclusion
Our experts include:
Cath Hakanson, qualified sexual health nurse, author, speaker and the founder of Sex Ed Rescue.
https://sexedrescue.com/
Vanessa Hamilton, sexuality educator and the founder of education business ‘Talking The Talk Healthy Sexuality Education’, with over 25 years of experience as a registered sexual health nurse.
https://www.talkingthetalksexed.com.au/
Dr Jane Cherrington, PhD in discursive psychology, with some post-doctoral work around the themes in porn, founder of the Sex in Space Project.
https://sexinspace.com/
Justin Hancock, writer/editor of BISH, a trained sexual health trainer, qualified youth worker, and a sex and relationships educator since 1999.
https://www.bishuk.com/
Nikki Denholm, director at The Light Project, which aims to equip youth, their whānau and communities to build porn literacy and positively navigate the new porn landscape.
https://thelightproject.co.nz/
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this episode of the podcast, we were joined by Danielle Broster from the Australian Federal Police. Danielle is a Senior Prevention Officer for their Online Child Safety Team, which she has been a part of for five years. The Australian Federal Police lead an education program called Think U Know, which aims to prevent online child sexual exploitation. Together, Danielle and Tim had a conversation all about sextortion – what it is, who it affects and the warning signs that someone might be a victim, as well as advice for parents on what they can do to help protect their kids against sextortion.
TRIGGER WARNING: this episode discusses topics related to sextortion, online exploitation, and the manipulation of young people. These are sensitive and potentially distressing subjects, so listener discretion is advised. If you find any part of this conversation overwhelming, please reach out to support services if needed.
Find Think U Know here: https://www.thinkuknow.org.au/
ACCCE (Australian Centre to Counter Child Exploitation): https://www.accce.gov.au/
Timestamps
00:00 – Intro
02:33 – How Think U Know started and what they do
04:08 – What is sextortion and who does it target?
11:07 – Do perpetrators follow through with threats?
12:45 – How big is the issue?
15:42 – Advice to help prevent sextortion
20:30 – What conversations to have at what age
22:00 – What are the red flags that suggest someone might be at risk?
23:46 – What empowers young people to report sextortion?
25:46 – Signs someone might be the victim of sextortion
27:58 – Balancing privacy and trust with your child
31:05 – What to do if you find out your child is a victim of sextortion
34:15 – How the AFP is helping prevent sextortion
36:32 – Top tips for both parents and teens
38:05 – Where to find more information
40:57 – How the tech landscape has changed over time
43:57 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On today’s episode of the podcast, we were thrilled to be joined by the lovely Teri Hofford. Teri is a body image educator, bestselling author, photographer and TedX speaker who helps people unf*ck their beliefs around bodies and business so that they can move closer to their most authentic selves. We were very excited to have a conversation with her today about all things relating to body image – the meaning that we make out of our bodies and where those thoughts come from, how we can reframe negative thoughts about ourselves, what confidence can look like for different people, and why being curious is so important when it comes to shifting the way we think and feel about our bodies.
Find Teri here: https://terihofford.com/
Or on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/terihofford
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:50 – What Teri does and how she got involved working in this space
03:06 – 5 reasons you look bad in photos
06:50 – Using photography to explore difficult subjects
08:44 – How to change your attitude towards your body
11:10 – Treat yourself like you’d treat a friend
13:07 – 3 steps to reframing negative body talk
16:17 – The impact of asexuality on body image
23:55 – Most common myths about body image + confidence
27:40 – Teri’s project celebrating bodies as they are
30:30 – Body Image Bootcamp: what it’s all about
33:34 – Being able to freely exist in your body
35:10 – Our bodies are a representation of what we feel about ourselves
40:14 – Teri’s message to her younger self
42:16 – Why we have to be intentional to reframe our thoughts about our bodies
45:02 – You’re not as special as you think you are
49:04 – Where to find Teri
50:05 - Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On this week’s episode of the podcast, Tim had the opportunity to talk with Tina Horn – a writer, educatrix, and media-maker. She is the author of Why Are People Into That?: A Cultural Investigation of Kink (Hachette), a book based on her long-running indie fetish podcast. Tina is the creator/writer of the sci-fi sex-rebel comic book series Safe Sex /SfSx, and the cult detective thriller Deprog; she was also the host/cowriter of the phone sex podcast Operator (Wondery). Her reporting on sexual subcultures has appeared in Rolling Stone, Playboy, Hazlitt, Glamour, Jezebel and elsewhere; she is the author of two other nonfiction books and has contributed to numerous anthologies including We Too: Essays on Sex Work and Survival, which she also coedited. Tina has lectured on adult entertainment politics and queer BDSM identities at universities and community centres all over North America, and works as an on-set consultant for theatre, film, and television including the dominatrix scenes of Pose. She is a LAMBDA Literary Fellow, an AVN nominee, the recipient of two Feminist Porn Awards, and holds an MFA in Creative Nonfiction Writing from Sarah Lawrence.
Find Tina here: https://www.instagram.com/tinahornsass/?hl=en
Or at her website: https://tinahorn.net/
Timestamps
00:00 – Intro
01:50 – What is a kink?
05:20 – The influence of the internet on our sexual behaviours
07:06 – How would you define rough sex?
08:49 – Our relationship with obsession
14:00 – Connecting to others through sexuality
15:59 – How to bring your desires and fantasies to life
22:02 – Different kinds of foot fetishes
26:50 – Embracing pleasure
29:13 – Places we can learn from
32:36 – Learning about sex from observation and conversations
34:08 – Why are people into that? The cultural investigation of kink.
35:30 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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For this episode we were thrilled to be joined by Melody Thomas, the creator and host of The Good Sex Project – a podcast about good sex, good relationships and how to have them.
Together, Melody and Toshi spoke about what she’s learned from her two seasons creating this podcast, how the work has impacted Melody’s own sex life, what she wishes she knew earlier about sex and relationships, and some of the most memorable moments from the conversations she’s had.
Check out The Good Sex Project here: https://interactives.stuff.co.nz/the-good-sex-project-podcast/
Timestamps
00:00 – Intro
00:40 – What is The Good Sex Project all about?
02:09 – How people have responded to The Good Sex Project
03:51 – Melody’s biggest learnings about sex and relationships
07:39 – Advice to feel more comfortable talking about sex
10:05 – Taboos that still need to be broken down
12:59 – Sex advice Melody would give to her younger self
14:31 – How you can prioritise your own pleasure
17:00 – Communication tips
18:47 – Identifying unhealthy relationships
20:20 – Why asking questions is so important
21:55 – The expectations we take from porn
22:57 – How Melody’s sexual experiences have changed over time
24:17 – How sex-negative thinking can impact our physical experiences
26:33 – Where listeners can tune into The Good Sex Project
27:06 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
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For more info, check out our website at:
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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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On the latest episode of the Sex in Space podcast, Toshi had the opportunity to speak with Anil Padavatan, the Health Programs Lead at GATE, (Global Action for Trans Equality), about trans healthcare. Together, they had a conversation about what trans healthcare is, why and how all kinds of people – not just those who are transgender – access services like puberty blockers and hormone replacement therapy, they debunked some common myths and misinformation surrounding this topic, and looked at the different ways that families can exist in the world.
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:39 – What is GATE?
01:13 – What does it mean to be transgender?
02:42 – What is trans healthcare?
03:38 – What is gender affirming care?
04:48 – Some examples of gender affirming care
05:18 – Some reasons a person might access gender affirming care
06:09 – Cisgender people also access gender affirming care
08:13 – How do puberty blockers work?
09:37 – Are puberty blockers reversible?
10:41 – When can people use puberty blockers?
13:13 – Risks and benefits of puberty blockers
16:41 – The reality of medical interventions for young people
18:45 – What is hormone replacement therapy and who uses it?
21:34 – Being transgender and fertility
26:23 – What is gender affirming surgery?
27:50 – Who is able to access gender affirming surgery?
30:05 – The facts around gender affirming surgery and regret
34:25 – Different kinds of families
37:42 – Conclusion
Resources:
World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH) Standards of Care 8:
https://www.wpath.org/soc8
Guidelines for gender affirming healthcare for gender diverse and transgender children, young people and adults in Aotearoa, New Zealand:
https://patha.nz/Guidelines
Southern African HIV Clinicians Society Gender Affirming Healthcare Guidelines: https://www.sahivsoc.org/Subheader/Index/sahcs-guidelines
Cornell University Public Policy Research Portal, What does the scholarly research say about the effect of gender transition on transgender well-being?:
https://whatweknow.inequality.cornell.edu/topics/lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-about-the-well-being-of-transgender-people/
GATE Knowledge Portal:
https://gate.ngo/knowledge-portal/
Reaffirming Autonomy of Trans and Gender Diverse Children and Adolescents:
https://gate.ngo/knowledge-portal/publication/reaffirming-autonomy-of-trans-and-gender-diverse-children-and-adolescents/
Trans and Intersex Rising Zimbabwe:
https://trinrizim.weebly.com/
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On this week's episode of the podcast, we were thrilled to be joined by Dr Paula Hall, a sexual and relationship psychotherapist who specialises in helping people affected by sex addiction and porn addiction. Dr Hall has been working as a therapist for 30 years and currently runs the biggest clinic in the UK, and the biggest therapy training programme for compulsive sexual behaviours.
Together, Dr Hall and Toshi spoke about identifying problematic porn use, advice for anyone who thinks that their porn consumption might be an issue, the impact that compulsive porn use has on partners and how they can access support of their own, why being anti-porn is not the solution and why compulsive porn use is the symptom of a bigger issue.
Dr Hall is the author of several books including Understanding & Treating Sex and Pornography Addiction, Sex Addiction: The Partner’s Perspective, Confronting Porn, and Sex Addiction: A Guide for Couples. Dr Hall has also peer reviewed a number of papers.
Watch her TED Talk on sex addiction here: https://youtu.be/-Qf2e3XZ8Tw?si=8VpOEgOynjCgDxjU
Learn more about the Laurel Centre: https://thelaurelcentre.co.uk/
Find more info about Pivotal Recovery here: https://www.pivotalrecovery.org/
Check out our book, 'How to talk with your kids about porn: https://www.sexinspace.com/book-2
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:40 – Dr Hall’s background + work
03:41 – Porn addiction vs compulsive porn use
06:02 – When is someone’s porn use problematic?
08:31 – Advice if you think your porn use might be an issue
10:33 – How shame gets in the way of people seeking help
12:45 – Why you need to work out what healthy sexuality means for you
14:36 – The impact of compulsive porn use on partners
16:55 – Support for partners of someone with compulsive porn use
18:43 – Dr Hall’s message for parents
24:06 – Why being anti-porn is not a solution
27:44 – The issue with trying to block pornography
29:28 – How moral debates can get in the way of helping people
33:18 – Compulsive porn use is the symptom of a bigger issue
35:52 – How the brain changes when a behaviour shifts from being recreational to compulsive
38:22 – One thing Dr. Hall wants you to take away from this podcast
39:31 – About Pivotal Recovery
40:43 - Conclusion
Software mentioned by Dr Hall -
Canopy: https://canopy.us/
Qustodio: https://www.qustodio.com/en/
Covenant Eyes: https://www.covenanteyes.com/
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https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Tim was joined by Catherine Carr for this episode – Catherine is producer of the acclaimed BBC Radio 4 series 'About The Boys.' This insightful five-part series takes a deep dive into the lives of teenage boys in the UK, exploring their challenges, fears, and hopes in a world that's rapidly changing. The show has been praised for its honest and raw portrayal of boys' experiences, offering a platform for their voices to be heard. Catherine, who is also a mother of boys, brings a unique and empathetic perspective to the series, making it a must-listen for anyone interested in the lives of young men today.
Listen to ‘About the Boys’ here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001yshm/episodes/player
Freddie Feltham, mentioned in the podcast: https://www.theguardian.com/news/2024/jan/06/im-andrew-tates-audience-and-i-know-why-he-appeals-to-young-men
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
01:26 – Catherine’s background
03:26 – What ‘About the Boys’ is all about
06:14 – The two stories that kicked off the project
11:37 – How Catherine put the series together
12:47 – Societal perceptions of young boys
16:29 – Letting the boys tell their story
18:30 – The impact of social media on boys
21:03 – Problematic male influencers
24:51 – The gaps in education for young people
29:00 – Where young people are learning from
31:45 – Tips for talking with kids about sexuality and relationships
33:17 – The spaces boys inhabit: real and online
37:41 – The importance of honest conversations
40:41 – Ending on a note of optimism
41:27 – Will there be an ‘About the Girls’?
43:10 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Toshi spoke with Verity Johnson, also known as Miss Vee, who MC’s for Men of Steel, New Zealand’s only male strip club. Toshi and Verity had a conversation about what audience members can expect from a night at Men of Steel, Verity’s advice for anyone thinking of going but who might be a little nervous, as well as what she’s learned about female sexuality in New Zealand from working at Men of Steel – including the differences between different generations of women and their attitudes towards sexuality, and tips for becoming less apologetic about your sexuality and desires as a female.
Check out Men of Steel here: https://www.menofsteel.co.nz/
Find them on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clubmenofsteel/?hl=en
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:40 – What is Men of Steel?
02:35 – How people respond to the experience
03:48 – What does a typical night look like at Men of Steel?
06:55 – Who goes to this male strip club?
09:25 – Female sexuality in New Zealand
13:07 – What to know if you feel nervous about going to Men of Steel
15:00 – What Miss Vee wishes people knew about Men of Steel
16:58 – Views around male stripping over the past 25 years
18:54 – Different generational attitudes towards sex
22:16 – Advice on embracing your sexuality
23:54 – Listen to this if you’re thinking about coming to Men of Steel
24:28 – Ticket info
24:42 – Conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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For this episode, Toshi was joined by Kate Barnhart from New Alternatives NYC, a multi-service drop-in centre for LGBT homeless youth and young adults in New York City. They provide a range of services, everything from food, court advocacy, school supplies and supportive counselling. Together, Kate and Toshi spoke about the work that New Alternatives does, and why it’s so important.
Find New Alternatives NYC here: https://www.newalternativesnyc.org/
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
00:30 – Why LGBTQ+ youth are more at risk of being homeless
01:56 – What services does New Alternatives NYC offer?
03:31 – Meeting mental health needs
05:28 – How LGBTQ+ youth respond to the services offered by New Alternatives
06:04 – Memorable moments working at New Alternatives
08:43 – Who volunteers at New Alternatives
10:12 – Why Kate founded New Alternatives
11:42 – What Kate’s learned from working here
12:42 – Why this job is like solving a puzzle
13:24 – How listeners can support New Alternatives NYC
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Sex in Space is a weekly podcast where we have open-minded conversations, delving into sex across all its infinite dimensions. Stories and voices from all genders, ages, relationships, life stages, ethnicities, walks of life, professions and ways of being in the universe.
Available everywhere extraordinary podcasts are found. Subscribe to make sure you never miss an episode!
Check out the full podcast episodes mentioned in the trailer:
Dr Laurie Mintz / Satisfying sex lives: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/26-laurie-mintz-satisfying-sex-lives/id1554815508?i=1000622992065
Vanessa Hamilton / Sex ed for parents: top tips for tricky talks: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/38-vanessa-hamilton-sex-ed-for-parents-top-tips-for/id1554815508?i=1000633155903
Dr Jane Cherrington / How to talk with your kids about porn: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/43-dr-jane-cherrington-how-to-talk-with-your-kids-about-porn/id1554815508?i=1000641628876
Morgana O'Reilly / Let's talk bodies: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/30-morgana-oreilly-lets-talk-bodies/id1554815508?i=1000626751039
Michelle Hardenbrook / Owning the OnlyFans side-hustle: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/23-michelle-hardenbrook-owning-the-onlyfans-side-hustle/id1554815508?i=1000613465077
Shaneel Lal / Banning conversion therapy in NZ: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/37-shaneel-lal-banning-conversion-therapy-in-nz/id1554815508?i=1000632494766
Alex Layendecker / Sex in space: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/69-dr-alex-layendecker-sex-in-space/id1554815508?i=1000663034331
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Toshi was joined by the wonderful Susan Bratton for today’s episode. Susan is an intimacy expert to millions, who is known as an ‘orgasmanaut’ and is an advocate for all those who desire intimacy and passion their whole life long. She's created a whole bunch of techniques that transform “having sex” into making love, and is the bestselling author and publisher of an incredible 44 books.
In this episode, Toshi and Susan spoke about why sex is a lifelong skill, the different kinds of orgasms the human body can experience, why bedroom communication skills are so important and how to get better at them, Susan’s top tips for having a great sex life, how to figure out your relationship values, and how to use erotic playdates to add variety to your sex life.
Find more of Susan here: https://susanbratton.com/
Find her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susanbratton
Timestamps:
00:00 – Intro
01:20 – Susan the ‘orgasmanaut’
02:08 – What is an extended orgasm?
04:15 – What is an expanded orgasm?
06:07 – Susan’s experience with orgasms
07:43 – Susan's sex advice for younger people
11:00 – Matriarchal perspectives on sex
12:00 – Understanding pleasure and the female body
12:53 – The three ‘prongs’ to great sex
14:30 – The important thing to do to have a great sex life
16:21 – The sexual soulmate pact
21:03 – Working out what you want in bed
22:55 – How to communicate what you want with a partner
26:45 – Sharing favourite frames after you make love
28:51 – Figuring out your relationship values
32:55 – Using erotic playdates to add variety to your sex life
36:01 – Summary and conclusion
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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.
Follow us here:
https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom
https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom
https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace
For more info, check out our website at:
https://www.sexinspace.com/
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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