Episodes

  • In this episode of the 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing the uneven distribution of emotional and mental labor and how this impacts parenting partnerships. Emotional and mental labor is the work required for both logistical and psychological aspects of families. It doesn’t usually affect marriage partnerships until after couples have children. And the sad truth is that typically, one person in a marriage is doing the majority of the work. In heterosexual couples, it’s usually women. In the episode, I’ll illustrate what this unequal division looks like and how it can impact your family.

    Points we discuss include:

    Examples of emotional and mental labor Who takes on the work The impacts of the unequal distribution of labor What to do about it

    Carrying the majority of mental and emotional labor for your family is exhausting, but the first step to changing it is awareness of it. I encourage you to talk about this issue and share this episode with people you care about to get the discussion going. I hope that this episode validates your experience and gives you some tools for starting to shift the unequal balance.

    I’ll see you back here after the summer break! Stay tuned for some exciting and fresh content in August. Have a great summer vacation.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    The Bulk of Emotional Labor Falls on Moms

    Moms Do More Invisible Labor

    The Hidden Load

  • In this episode of the 3D Parent Podcast, we are talking about sleep-away camp and whether or not your child should go. This can be a wonderful opportunity for your child to grow in maturity and independence, make new friends, and just have an incredibly fun summer experience. Today, I’ll guide you through some things to consider as you decide whether attending a sleep-away camp would be a good option for your child.

    Points we discuss include:

    Possible benefits of sleep-away camp How to prepare your child for camp How to help your child hold onto your connection when you are apart Post-camp “re-entry”

    Sleep-away camp can be an invaluable experience for children. They have the opportunity to make memories and friendships that last a lifetime. However, your child may not be ready for it yet, or it may not ever be a good fit for them. You have to find the opportunity that’s best for you and your family. I hope this episode helps you take the necessary steps to make this decision.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    Homesick and Happy: How Time Away from Parents Can Help a Child Grow

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  • In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m talking about why kids don’t listen to their parents. This is an issue I hear many parents talk about in my coaching practice, and I also have personal experience with this issue as a mother of four children. Parents often assume that kids don’t listen because they are being disrespectful or lack discipline. But it’s actually an issue with how parents communicate.

    Points we’ll discuss include:

    The reasons children don’t listen How parents can fix the issue

    We all would love our children to do what we say just because we are the parent. But it doesn’t work like that. And ask yourself: do you like to be ordered, threatened, punished, or lectured? Neither do your kids! A relationship-focused approach to communicating with your kids is always better and sets them up for respectful communication with others in the future.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    How to Get Your Child to LISTEN!

    10 Reasons Your Kids Don’t Listen to You

  • In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing the difference between natural and imposed consequences and how they affect our children’s behavior. All parents want their children to grow into true maturity and take responsibility for their actions. The traditional methods of issuing rewards and punishments may seem to work, but it ultimately backfires. In the episode, I’ll talk about how to use natural consequences and our relationship with our child to help them grow and learn from mistakes.

    Points we discuss include:

    The difference between natural and imposed consequences The problem with imposed consequences Using natural consequences to our advantage How our connection with children influences their behavior

    I hope you'll think a little bit more about the use of both natural and imposed consequences and how they affect your children. When your children make a mistake, I invite you to take a step back and get to the reason why the mistake was made in the first place. Instead of jumping right into issuing an imposed consequence, take a step back and see if you could figure out the root of the behavior. Perhaps nature can teach the lesson through a natural consequence, and you can see if you can help your children come up with their own solution in a way to make things right in the future.

  • In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m sharing the surprising benefits of pet ownership for children. Taking care of animals can help children develop responsibility, empathy, and motivation. It can be wonderful for both their physical and emotional health.

    Points we discuss include:

    How pet ownership helps children develop into maturity The ways animals can help regulate emotions Points to consider before bringing animals into your family

    While pet ownership is a big responsibility, it can bring so much joy into the lives of children. Should you decide to dive into pet ownership, you might discover and experience all the hidden benefits a pet can provide for your child and find a new way to connect as a family through your pet(s).

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Schedule a free parent coach consultation/interest call!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    25 Benefits for Kids Growing Up with Pets

    How Pets Can Help Children with Mental Health and Development

    The Best Pets for Kids at Each Age

    12 Best Pets for Kids

    13 Low Maintenance Pets for Kids

    Episode 19: The Power and Importance of Play

    Episode 23: Parenting the Highly Sensitive “Orchid” Child

    Episode 42: Parenting Dominant “Alpha” Children

    Episode 47: Encouraging Empathy in Children

    Episode 50: Parenting an Anxious Child

    Episode 70: How to Help the Child who Bullies

  • In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m focusing on finding the best school fit for highly sensitive children. Typical or traditional school environments can often be highly overwhelming and even wounding for highly sensitive children. An overly stimulating classroom can cause high alarm for children with this temperament. Today we will examine the unique needs of children who are highly sensitive and discuss how to make the best decision for your child and your family.

    Points we will discuss include:

    How traditional school environments affect highly sensitive children Special considerations for the schooling environment of highly sensitive children How to know if your current school environment is working or if it’s time for a change

    If you have a highly sensitive child and a typical school environment seems like it is not a good fit for your kid or is not working, you may be right. Realize that you may need to go down a different path than you anticipated or change your child’s world if it is not working. And remember that what’s needed now will not necessarily be what is needed forever. Trust yourself to make the best decision for your child and your family.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Schedule a free parent coach consultation/interest call!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    Episode 23: Parenting the Highly Sensitive “Orchid” Child

    The Perfect School for Highly Sensitive Children Article

  • “Time-outs use your relationship as something that can be given and then taken away; it makes your relationship with your child conditional.”

    Time-outs are a widely utilized parenting technique. A time-out is a punitive consequence used to “teach a lesson” to a child. While this technique is popular and recommended by many professionals, there is evidence that time-outs do much harm and very little good for the parent-child relationship. That’s why in this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I will share why time-outs are problematic and suggest ways to discipline without using time-outs.

    Points we will discuss include:

    Why time-outs are so widely used How time-outs can strain the parent-child relationship Alternative strategies to using time-outs

    Discipline choices either contribute or detract from the conditions which are optimal for growth, maturation, and the development of self-control. You cannot force maturity through time-outs. In fact, you may even stall true maturation and make it more difficult to have the power to influence your child through your deep connection.

    Perhaps it is the time-out itself which needs a time-out! I hope that you will think twice before giving a time-out and try a connecting strategy instead.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    The Trouble with Time-outs article by Deborah Macnamara

  • “Most problematic behaviors are driven by an unmet need. So the question is not what to do, but rather, what’s the cause?”

    In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m focusing on one of the most common questions I get in my coaching practice. Many parents ask how they should respond to particular behaviors of their children. They ask, “What should I do when my child behaves like
” I can tell in their questioning that they are looking for a tool, trick, or fitting punishment/consequence to match and solve the behavior. However, what they should be asking instead is, “What is driving this behavior?” When parents can name the cause of the behavior, then they will realize they know how to respond.

    Points we will discuss include:

    Six essential needs our children have What it looks like when these needs are met and unmet How to determine and respond to our children’s needs

    Parents, remember that it’s not about “what to do when
” That’s the wrong question. Asking that question is causing you to lose your sense of intuition and direction. Instead, it’s about asking what unmet need is driving the behavior. I invite you to put on your 3D Parent lens and determine what unmet need is causing the behavior and then provide the answer by meeting the need.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    Episode 19: The Power and Importance of Play

    The Science of Emotion Course

    Discipline without Distress Book

    Empowering Communication Booklet

  • In this special episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m giving a live coaching session of myself working with a parent on a specific challenge they are facing. We’ll dive into the history and causes of the problem, as well as discuss potential solutions using the 3D Parent approach. I am joined today by Lauren, a mom of an 18-month-old boy, Baby J. Baby J is a spirited and adventurous little boy, but he sometimes has outbursts of emotional aggression. In the episode, I discuss with Lauren how she can help Baby J better express his emotions.

    In the episode, we discuss:

    Emotional frustration in young children Spirited and sensitive temperaments Ways to deal handle emotional aggression

    Emotional aggression is a common issue, especially in young children who don’t have full language acquisition yet. Understanding the root of their frustrations and learning to help them express their emotions is very helpful in managing their outbursts.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

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    CONNECT WITH LAUREN:

    Instagram

  • Today’s episode of The 3D Parent Podcast is based on a question-- “What makes a good parent?” I recently learned that the number one searched question on the internet when it comes to parenting is “how to be a good parent.” I’m really curious how we define good parenting and how we judge whether we are or aren’t good parents. In today’s episode, I want to define what makes a good parent and hopefully provide you with some relief that you are, despite your challenges, a good parent.

    Some points we’ll discuss include:

    What makes a good parent (and who defines this) Embracing real-life “non-Instagrammable” moments How to end perfectionism and trust yourself

    If you’ve googled “how to be a good parent,” please know that I am 100% confident that you already are. Stop worrying about how you or your kids compare and measure up, and remember that parenting is a journey to embark upon, not a race to be won. That journey is sure to come with many twists and turns, complications, and surprises. So trust that journey, and trust yourself.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Schedule a free parent coach consultation/interest call!

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  • “Kids are born knowing how to sleep. Our job as adults is to create an environment where sleep feels like a safe and happy place.”

    In this episode, I’m excited to welcome a special guest, Sarah R. Moore! She is the founder of Dandelion Seeds Positive Parenting. As a certified gentle parenting coach, she's a regular contributor to international parenting magazines, as well as frequent guest on podcasts and parenting summits. She offers a popular series of mini-courses, webinars, and expert interviews. She's currently writing two books that will be released this year. I’m excited to have her on the podcast to share her perspective on a more gentle approach to children’s sleeping habits.

    Some points we will discuss include:

    The conventional wisdom around sleep training and the problems behind it How the Cry it out (CIO) method affects your child How parents can trust their intuition when it comes to making decisions for their children

    Ultimately, you know what is best for your family, and you can feel confident trusting your instincts. We hope this episode has helped you feel less conflicted and confused about making decisions around children’s sleeping habits.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Schedule a free parent coach consultation/interest call!

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    CONNECT WITH SARAH:

    FACEBOOK

    INSTAGRAM

    PINTEREST

    TWITTER

    YOUTUBE

    COURSES

    EXPERT INTERVIEWS

  • “Parenting is a great lesson in this pandemic. Parenting is a master class. You can make all the plans you want, but that doesn't mean they're going to work out.”

    In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m sharing your thoughts and reflections on a year of pandemic parenting. It has been one year since the arrival of Covid-19 in the United States, and I wanted to reflect on this past year. I put out five questions on social media and collected responses from you, my listeners.

    The five questions I asked were:

    What has been the hardest part of parenting during this last year? What has/have been your family’s silver lining(s)? Is there anything you hope to continue when more typical life returns? If you could go back to March 2020 and offer your past self any advice, what would it be? Is there anything you never want to see, do, or hear again (related to parenting)?

    In the episode, I read listeners’ responses to these questions, as well as share my own reflections. It was very interesting to hear a diverse group of people respond to these questions. I hope hearing these reflections helps you feel less alone in your own pandemic parenting. Please keep the conversation going with me on social media! I want to hear from you.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Schedule a free parent coach consultation/interest call!

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  • “A child who bullies is capable of transformation.”

    In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m talking about how to help children who bully others. Most of the conversations I hear around bullying are focused on the victims of bullying. It’s being forgotten that bullies are deeply wounded children who also need help.

    We will go over topics such as:

    Why children become bullies What is and is not effective in preventing bullying How relationships can change bullies

    I hope this episode reminds you that bullies are still children who need us and that it gives you some ideas about how you can help wounded children.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    Reclaiming our Students Book

  • *Trigger warning: I will refer to youth suicide and self-harming behaviors as it relates to bullying. Please proceed with caution if talking about this topic is a trigger for you.*

    “When children feel seen, heard, and accepted for who they are in their parent’s eyes, they won’t believe that they don’t belong or are without value like the bullies want them to believe.”

    In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I am talking about how you can “bully-proof” your child. It’s no doubt that parents want their children to find acceptance and belonging with their peers. Unfortunately, we know that this is not always the case. As parents, we cannot completely protect our children from bullying, but we can work to boost their self-esteem and help them feel loved and supported so that the words of a bully will not hurt them as much.

    We will go over topics such as:

    What bullying is and isn’t Developing a connection that can cushion your child from the blow of harsh treatment from others Helping your child orient to adult caretakers rather than peers

    I hope this episode gives you practical ways to support your child. Remember that you cannot protect them from everything, but you can be as supportive and nurturing as you can to help them.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

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    EPISODE RESOURCES:

    Episode 3: Cultivating a Deep Connection with Our Children

    Hardened or Hardy Article

    Hold on to Your Kids Book

  • “Clothing confidence comes from really owning the fact that if a piece of clothing doesn't fit, that's the only thing. That means it doesn't mean that your body is too big. It doesn't mean that it's too tall or too long or too curvy or too whatever. It just means that this piece of clothing doesn't fit.” --Holly Chayes

    In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m joined by style coach and consultant Holly Chayes. We are talking about how personal style is a form of self-care and self-expression and how to maintain that as a parent.

    We will go over topics such as:

    How clothing can profoundly affect the way you feel How body acceptance comes into play with personal style How to balance the needs of your life with the wardrobe you want

    I hope this episode helps you think about the style you want to express and how you can balance that with all your responsibilities as a parent.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Grab your free copy of the 10 Steps To Get Back in Control of Your Children here!

    CONNECT WITH THE 3D PARENT:

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    CONNECT WITH HOLLY:

    WEBSITE

    PODCAST: TALKING ABOUT CLOTHES WITH HOLLY CHAYES

    FREE E-BOOK: PERSONAL STYLE FUNDAMENTALS

  • “You have to keep the kids at the pinnacle of the decision-making. They are the true north.” --Merry Senn

    This week on The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing co-parenting with special guests Merry and Ashley Senn. Merry and Ashley are good friends of mine from the theater community. They have been married for just over five years. They live in Edmonds WA and share 2 boys Calvin (12) and Sawyer (9). Years of friendship and couplehood have led them to begin their own podcast, Your Friends Ash & Mer. They have honest and mostly hysterical conversations about marriage, parenthood, and making it through this life together. The highlight of their show is when Ash & Mer talk to their incredible friends from every facet of their life and bring their unique and incredible stories to their podcast listeners. They are great examples of people who make co-parenting look easy, despite its challenges.

    We will go over topics such as:

    Common challenges of co-parenting Navigating family transitions and custody arrangements Tools parents can use to make co-parenting easier

    Merry and Ashley say that keeping their children at the pinnacle of their decision-making is crucial. If you keep their best interests at heart, then the best decisions will be made. Co-parenting is challenging, but with good communication and strategy, it is manageable.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

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    CONNECT WITH ASHLEY AND MERRY:

    PODCAST

    INSTAGRAM

    FACEBOOK

  • In this episode of The 3D Parent Podcast, I want to take the opportunity to speak to people who consider themselves allies in the fight against systemic racism. This episode is an opportunity for you to assess where you and your family are when it comes to your commitment to be an anti-racist family.

    We will go over topics such as:

    The history of Black History Month How Black History might actually uphold white supremacy The cycle of inaction

    I hope this episode will help you evaluate where you are and help you move forward in your commitment to anti-racism.

    If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent

    Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here!

    Grab your free copy of the 10 Steps To Get Back in Control of Your Children here!

    CONNECT WITH THE 3D PARENT:

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  • “We felt there were a lot of opportunities to expand our knowledge of the world and to have our children increase their ability to interact in a meaningful way with people that didn't look like them and that didn't speak like them.” This week on The 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing if au pairs may be right for your family. My family has hosted a total of eight au pairs over the years, and I want to share my experience and tips with you about the au pair process. We will go over topics such as: What an au pair is and how it’s different from a nanny Pros and challenges of having an au pair Tips on the au pair matching process How to welcome your au pair into your home While having an au pair takes patience and flexibility, it can be a wonderfully enriching experience for your whole family. I hope this episode helps you decide if having an au pair is the right fit for your family. If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share it your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here! Grab your free copy of the 10 Steps To Get Back in Control of Your Children here! CONNECT WITH THE 3D PARENT: Instagram Facebook The 3D Parent Lounge Facebook Community EPISODE RESOURCES OH MY, AU PAIR! BOOK

  • “We tend to sometimes not be able to differentiate between somebody else's problem stress, worry, frustration and our own.” This week on the 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing parenting tips for empaths and highly sensitive people. I’m defining Highly Sensitive People, or HSPs for short as people who have sensory processing sensitivity and about 15-20% of the population fits into this category. Being an HSP parent presents challenges, but there are also many gifts. We will go over topics such as: Challenges for HSP parents Stress-relieving activities How to see your sensitivity as a gift With healthy skills in place, you will come to see your sensitivity as a gift and will be better able to manage your and your child’s emotions. If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here! Grab your free copy of the 10 Steps To Get Back in Control of Your Children here! CONNECT WITH THE 3D PARENT: Instagram Facebook The 3D Parent Lounge Facebook Community EPISODE RESOURCES Unlocking Us Podcast Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

  • “Rewards are problematic because you're not calling upon your attachment and connection with your child to motivate change. You have to go to something external that you feel might have an influence on your children because you don't.” This week on the 3D Parent Podcast, I’m discussing the use of bribes and rewards with children. While these kinds of external motivators can sometimes be helpful, using them for long-term discipline actually creates more problems. We will go over topics such as: What makes bribes and rewards problematic How rewards can affect children’s development When using external motivation can be helpful To help children mature, we have to stop treating them like rats in a Psychology experiment! To grow emotionally, they need to learn how to self-regulate and be internally motivated. I hope this episode inspires you to take a different and more effective approach to your parenting. If you have enjoyed this episode of the podcast, take a screenshot, head on over to Instagram and share your IG stories and tag me, @the3Dparent Do you have a parenting question for an upcoming episode? I would LOVE to connect with you and answer your questions. Please share your parenting question here! Grab your free copy of the 10 Steps To Get Back in Control of Your Children here! CONNECT WITH THE 3D PARENT: Instagram Facebook The 3D Parent Lounge Facebook Community