Episodes

  • “We’ve just beat Chelsea 5-0. Shall we take this upstairs?” Marcus, Luke, Pete and Vish react to a demolition job at the Emirates and some extremely intimate celebrations for the Arsenal fans.


    Elsewhere, the Ramblers show their support for Gary Neville being taken to task, even if Nottingham Forest are still embarrassing. Speaking of which, Luke also gives his thoughts on Erik ten Hag’s latest press conference. Plus, Marcus prepares to honour Bruce Forsyth live at The London Palladium!


    We're back on stage! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Tickets go on sale on Friday at footballramblelive.com. You can get presale tickets right now by signing up to our Patreon here or sign up to our mailing list here and get them straight in your inbox tomorrow!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus is calling for more corruption from officials after VAR correctly ruled out Coventry’s winner against Man United. At least the result means Erik ten Hag might keep his Job. So there is something for us all to enjoy.


    Elsewhere, Marcus, Jim and Pete investigate another huge conspiracy after hearing rumours that the VAR official in the Everton vs Forest game was a HUGE Football Ramble fan. Speaking of which, who invited José Mourinho to watch Liverpool play at Craven Cottage?


    We're back on stage! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Tickets go on sale on Friday at footballramblelive.com. You can get presale tickets on Thursday by signing up to our mailing list here or even earlier on Wednesday by signing up to our Patreon here!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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  • For the first time in five long years, the Football Ramble is back on the stage!


    On Friday 20th September 2024, we’re performing a very special show at the London Palladium. And we want YOU to join us!


    For one night only, Football Ramble: Time Tunnel will guide you through the most outrageous and hilarious moments in football across the last 17 years of the Ramble. 


    General sale goes LIVE on Friday April 26th at 10am BST at footballramblelive.com. 


    BUT if you want to get to the front of the queue, you can get PRESALE tickets on the Football Ramble Patreon from Wednesday at 10am BST! Just sign up at patreon.com/footballramble.


    You can also join our brand new Mailing List, The Team Sheet, where you’ll receive presale tickets on Thursday at 10am BST. Sign up HERE!


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Pep Guardiola arrived at Manchester City almost 8 years ago. A reign that started with sacking Joe Hart has turned into one the most impactful managerial careers in Premier League history. Today, Marcus, Andy and Luke assess how Pep has revolutionised the English game.


    Elsewhere, Luke explains we it is a joke that the player of the season is being awarded already. Plus, the Ramblers re-call some of their favourite mass celebrations and assess what food would be best to fire out of a T-shirt gun. It’s another classic Mailbag!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Shhh of course we knew that yellow cards don’t carry over to a penalty shootout! In Emi Martinez we trust.


    Marcus, Luke, Andy and Pete catch up after last night’s European frolickings and then realise that the FA Cup has crept up on us. Alejandro Garnacho shows digital contrition ahead of Man United’s semi-final against Coventry City, Paul Scholes gets his old chap out, and players injure themselves trying to avoid a club crest but show a #touchofclass.


    Plus, Portsmouth players swearing a lot on radio, Luke shares a message for the cowardly Vithushan Ehantharajah and Pete tells everyone how to use a knife and fork. 


    Sign up to our brand new mailing list, The Team Sheet, right here!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • How about them plucky underdogs Real Madrid, eh? Marcus and Vish are on hand to react to a disastrous evening in Europe for the English sides.


    On a night which saw Erling Haaland subbed before extra time, Vish asks whether Man City had too many cooks and no one to eat the pudding. In Munich, Arsenal also appeared to be lacking an appetite as they failed to trouble Bayern. We wonder where Arsenal go from here to ensure they can get the results when it really counts.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Barcelona may have lost the tie last night, but have they won the war to become the Champions League’s next banter club? Today, Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to review a night of Champos action that at times resembled a drunken brawl - and they bloody enjoyed it!


    You know what they also bloody enjoyed? Portsmouth returning to the Championship! And they created the perfect conditions for a pitch invasion...


    Plus, Andy compares Mauricio Pochettino to Tim Sherwood, Jim starts an unexpected campaign to unite the people of London, and the lads outline the ONLY circumstance in which Arsenal will want to hear Bayern Munich play the Can-can this evening.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • What’s that noise? Is that the sound of Euro-trash floating from Lineker’s Bar? That’s right, Pete thinks it’s official: Jack Grealish is already planing his post-title win sesh.


    Marcus, Jim and Pete react to a huge weekend at the top of the Premier League as both Liverpool and Arsenal promptly put their special carton of Premier League celebration milk back into the freezer (more on that at the end of the show). Plus, has Thierry Henry started shrinking yet? Has someone in the Brentford area named their baby after Marcus Speller? And what happens when you bring a bottle of water to a whip fight? Just ask Al-Ittihad striker Abderrazak Hamdallah. Come join us!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus, Andy and Pete text an anonymous burner phone and get a fresh batch of listener questions delivered to the studio - and there are some crackers!


    We wonder if a Premier League game could - and should - be played overseas after FIFA’s change of tune this week. Also, should professional fouls be dealt with more harshly? And which animal would cause maximum chaos if released onto a football pitch?


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Was last night Jürgen Klopp's final European game at Anfield? If so it didn't end well. Today, Marcus, Andy and Pete are here to remind Klopp that going out of the Europa League would at least mean he is on the beach a week earlier...


    Elsewhere, Pete expresses his jealousy towards John McGinn’s large bum and, in an unrelated turn of events, he and Andy explain how they are coping with their midlife crises.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Also, Xavi was wearing Stone Island on the touchline, so we can only assume he and his XL bully were waiting for Luis Enrique in the carpark.


    Marcus and Jim look back on two entertaining Champions League quarter-finals! Well, spare a thought for Marcus having to watch Atlético try to sit on a 2-0 lead…


    Plus, a reappraisal of Rodrigo de Paul (aka Messi’s bouncer) and his hair, speculation about Ronaldinho’s night out in Paris, and unconfirmed reports that Diego Simeone is making his players forage for food.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • How about that football, eh? Last night’s Champions League action was so good that Andy has decided he needs to get a second big telly to watch all the barns burn at once.


    Marcus, Jim, Vish and Andy reflect on Arsenal showing glimpses of their ITV era last night and marvel at the quality of goals on display in Madrid. Plus, Andy explains why Sporting manager Rúben Amorim would be a good fit for Liverpool.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Did you know that if you’re a Tottenham player you can punch a Nottingham Forest player on a Sunday afternoon without punishment? Today Marcus, Luke and Jim applaud James Maddison’s knowledge and application of that rule this weekend.


    Elsewhere, Luke compares Man United vs Liverpool to Pulp Fiction and Jim dismisses James Ward-Prowse scoring from a corner because it was “wind-assisted”. Plus, the Ramblers officially declare the business end of the season OPEN!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus, Luke and Jim are back in Correspondence Corner tackling some more of your cracking questions!


    We start with an interesting one: in the age of mass media coverage and scrabbling for social media clicks, is football punditry becoming more divisive and are club biases paraded around too often? 


    We also wonder which players or managers missed their chance at a big move, and we pitch some dream football documentaries about past teams and seasons. if anyone fancies making Jack Grealish: Uncovered with us, let us know. 


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • What… on EARTH was that?! Marcus, Luke and Jim recap Cole Palmer 4-3 Moments FC, where perhaps the biggest takeaway from one of the most ridiculous games you’ll ever see was: you’ve got to feel sorry for Harry Maguire.


    Elsewhere, Chris Wilder finds himself snookered, Vincent Kompany is forced to manage Burnley’s next crucial game from a blimp and we stumble across one of the most outrageously-named footballers you’ll ever find.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus didn’t think he’d ever make this comparison but… Phil Foden went full-blown Wayne Rooney against Aston Villa! It was a stunning hat-trick. But what were Villa doing leaving the serving hatch of their wall wide open for his first goal?


    Marcus and Jim react to victories for Man City and Arsenal which keep the title race cookin’. Plus, Marcus impersonates Jim’s dad and Steve Bruce reveals he has a tickly bum. Join us!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus, Luke and Jim dive into yet more Barclays action, as a gloriously violent cameo from Newcastle's Paul Dummett gave Everton some much-needed points. Generous, innit.


    Elsewhere, journalists continue to ask Mad Pep some even madder questions, Morgan Gibbs-White turns into primetime Zinedine Zidane and Liverpool prepare to use their Sheffield United at home voucher. A midweek treat!


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete return after Man City 0-0 Arsenal to find the barn very much intact. Wasn’t even remotely burned. Pep Guardiola still found plenty to be angry about, of course.


    Luckily there were plenty of other Barclays bangers to get stuck into, as Man United somehow escaped Brentford with a point, West Ham somehow lost a crazy game at Newcastle, and Chelsea somehow remain the most mid-table club in the division. According to Mauricio Pochettino, anyway - he thinks they should be fourth, you see. 


    Plus, Pete’s clumsy South Korean adventures and Mark Puppetmaster Clattenburg’s at it again - join us for a Bank Holiday blockbuster! 


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Luke, Jim and Vish kick off proceedings with an intriguing question about this season’s incredible title race: for which manager would winning the league be the biggest achievement?


    Plus, we’re building some famous football statues in some offensive locations and we finalise the definitive list of collective nouns for different clubs’ supporters.


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  • Three things we didn’t expect in the studio today: a hammer, Sean Connery, and loads of Wellman supplements after Pete played table tennis against David Gandy. It can only be Preview Show time!


    Pete, Luke, Jim and Vish – wielding said hammer – look forward to the return of the Premier League and the absolute egg-melter that is Man City vs Arsenal. Plus, an alarming email about mascots with human hands inspires the lads to construct our own Ramble mascot and the Luke Nation holds its breath for Jack’s Encyclopaedia…


    Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected].


    Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.


    ***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***


    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.