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When things go unexpectedly during your first birth, how do you plan for a second birth with the hope and expectation that they'll go better?
This week, we are speaking with Michelle Varela. Michelle is one of those rare and amazing women who knew that she wanted to give birth at home from a very young age. So when her first birth took an unexpected turn, it was confusing and disappointing, and there were certainly questions as to how things would be handled next time.
Episode Roundup:
The importance of our care providers. They make a huge difference. How things unfold does depend greatly on that.
But the second thing that's on my mind is just how incredible the body is, how beautifully designed it was and is, how beautifully designed it is to heal itself. While Michelle struggled with a 4th degree tear during her 1st birthing experience, she did not let that come in her way in terms of her second birth experience, and thank goodness that she didn't even know that other people might say, oh, that's too dangerous. She just did what she knew was best for her body, and what ended up happening was a beautiful birth with zero tearing.
Our bodies are so incredible. They're so incredible at healing. They're so resilient. So if you have found yourself in a place where you've given birth before and it didn't go the way that you wanted, desired, expected, or planned, Know this. Your body is resilient.
Your mind is resilient. Your heart is resilient, and next time it can be different just like it was for Michelle.
Last thing before I jump off, I did wanna share that Michelle's husband actually works with mothers postpartum. He helps with things like diastasis recti, pelvic floor dysfunction, and just overall achieving of physical goals.
Instagram: @codylanecollins
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We want a healthy baby and a healthy mama, right? But is it okay to ask for more than that? What if we have specific ideas and hopes and dreams for our birth? Is it okay to pray about that? Is it okay to ask the Lord for more?
This week, we are speaking to my friend Rachel Petersen. Now Rachel did just that. She had desires and she let the Lord know about them. So we're going to learn what that looked like and see how it unfolded for her in her birth experience.
Now, just a little bit more information on Rachel. She is certified through the Institute of Integrative Nutrition and the Herbal Academy. She specializes in women's hormones, cycle sinking, fertility, the fertility awareness method and prenatal and postpartum nutrition. So she's somebody that you're going to want to check out. She's on Instagram @nourish.thegood
Episode Roundup:
The first one being that Rachel shows us how it's okay to make your requests known to God. In fact, he tells us to, specifically, make your requests known to God and he will answer. Now, does it always look like the answer that Rachel received?
No, not necessarily. However, he does work all things for good. So even when the outcomes don't look the way we had expected, even when they look completely different from how we expected them to look, we know that we have a loving father who does care for us and, like Rachel said, He is aware of us.
He sees us. So whether your birth turns out as spectacularly as Rachel's does, or whether it turns out differently than expected, let God be big in it. Look for Him, He's there. Jesus, Emmanuel, God with us, He is there. So let's look back and see, where was He? Where was He in my experience?
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Once you've experienced a traumatic birth, the best you can hope for from that point on is just-- a birth without trauma, right? It's best to just play it safe- not to push the envelope....? Regina has been married to her husband Miles for 11 years and mother to their 3 children. Currently the Lowenfields live in Southern Indiana where they are building an events venue on their 75 acres. Today we'll hear how Regina and Miles experienced trauma, tried to cope, and then went big with their most recent birth experience. Before we jump in, I want to share an important update with you all. The release of this episode coincides exactly with the 5 year anniversary of this podcast. I am just so thrilled to look back over the last 5 years and to celebrate the 264 episodes that have been shared in that time. I also want to let you know that I am now going to be going on hiatus with the podcast. I am so excited to focus my energy on a few projects that the Lord has been drawing me into over the last year, and most importantly to spend every waking moment soaking up the beauty of my three little ones. I'm not sure if anyone's told you, but holy moly time goes FAST and one day you wake up and your oldest is seven years old and you wonder what the heck happened. So in the meantime, know this: I am still honored to provide you with the deepest homebirth childbirth education through The Homebirth Collective or Happy Homebirth Academy, both of which are self-paced and accessible in the show notes, at myhappyhomebirth.com, or through my instagram bio. I'm not going to be checking in on instagram or facebook often, so if you need anything, the best way to reach me is at [email protected]. If this podcast has meant something to you, would you take a moment now to leave a review? It would mean so much to me. Episode Roundup: If you've experienced a traumatic birth in the past, don't feel that you have to settle for 'not traumatic'. The opposite of a traumatic birth is not merely 'not traumatic', but it's ecstatic, and that's something that you can prepare for, pray for, and quit often attain. Alright, my friends. What an honor this has been. I look forward to coming back in the future with more beautiful stories, but in the meantime, I am praying for all of you. That you'll enjoy your pregnancies, your births, your babies, your children. That you'll feel the love of the Lord covering you like a blanket, realizing that it's somehow even deeper and stronger than that insane love we feel for our babies. I'll see you back here next time.
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You can't have a homebirth after 3 c sections, pre-eclampsia and being a "geriatric pregnancy", can you? This week, we're speaking with Jan DeAngelo, 43 year old mother of 4 babies who changed EVERYTHING in between her third and fourth births. We'll hear how she took control of her care and her family's wellbeing, and gave birth with confidence to her most recent little one. Episode RoundupYou're not high risk until you're high risk- Jan's midwife said this, and I find it such a beautiful way to approach each pregnancy individually. She wasn't focusing on the past, but looking at Jan and her pregnancy NOW. Instead of forcing fear and uncertainty onto her client, she trusted her abilities as a care provider, yes, but more importantly-- she trusted Jan's ability to give birth.Your mindset plays such a role in your birth. As we shared, in the past, Jan's doctors pathologized her pregnancy and birth up and down, and Jan accepted what they had to say. Because of this, she saw herself as high risk- as a disaster waiting to happen. This totally changed for her fourth birth, when she realized that she was designed to give birth. She changed her mindset and recognized that her body and her baby were not pathologies. She was able to approach this pregnancy and birth with excited anticipation, along with the knowledge that she could and would do things differently.Let's end with this-- it can be different this time. Maybe you've had a cesarean or several, maybe you've had preeclampsia or gestational diabetes or any number of "pathologies" in the past. Remember that this experience doesn't have to be the same as last time. Give yourself space to imagine something different. Visualize it, feel it. Find support who feels it, too. Of course, consider your own risk tolerance, but know that however events do unfold, you can experience your birth from a perspective of being the authority.
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Which is more important in birth preparation and birth itself? The body--or the mind?This week we're speaking with Errika Horner, a stay-at-home mom of 2 girls and blogger in her spare time, sharing healthy recipes and intentional homemaking inspiration on her website: thehomeintent.com. Episode RoundupAs Errika's story demonstrated, it is possible to have a positive birth experience in the hospital, if that’s the option you feel you need this time around, keep this at front of mind, as it can be extremely encouraging to hear those positive examples.Errika acknowledges that yes, her body was made for birthing, but it was her mind that made the difference between her two experiences. Errika had a much better understanding of what her body was doing in labor, and she visualized it all, even talking to her body during contractions. Errika feels that's what really made the second experience smoother and quicker.And finally, you don't have to learn every single possible coping technique. In fact, having just a few specific strategies planned to use during the birth can help, so that you know exactly how to prepare and focus.
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When you imagine a beautiful homebirth, what comes to mind? Everything unfolds perfectly, or nearly perfectly, right? This week, we're speaking with Coco Brown. Coco is a mother, currently navigating the labyrinth that is postpartum using ancestral knowledge and intuition to guide her. She is a maternal health and nourishment advocate sharing her intimate journey through home birth, postpartum, intuitive motherhood and well being through her online presence in hopes to deeply connect women and mothers around the world. Our story with Coco will challenge the idea that beauty is equivalent to a perfectly smooth birthing experience. As the title suggests, there will be discussion of a shoulder dystocia, so of course please consider this as you listen. However, I do want to share that Coco is a wonderful storyteller and she shares her experience both gently and realistically... and spoiler alert, but all went well in the end. Episode Roundup: Imagination. Many of you know that I view the world through a biblical lens, and something that's been on my mind for the last few months, and that relates in such a special way to this episode, is the idea of the imagination. Just like Coco shared how she took time to deeply envision her birth experience, and so much of it happened in the way that she'd put thought to. Lately, I've been reflecting on how The Lord uses our imagination for our good and His glory. We were given this ability to imagine-- to see things in our mind-- and it is such a gift. We're called to renew our minds and spirits and to think on whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—using our imagination to renew the mind and think on these things in our day to day life is the stuff of miracles. Use your imagination! Think on your pure, excellent, praiseworthy birth, mama.Next, I want to focus on how, between her first pregnancy and birth and her most recent, Coco learned to lean into her intuition and to truly listen to it. This is what led her to choose to give birth in her own home, and to choose a midwife who truly embodied what that word is supposed to mean-- someone who trusts, believes in physiological birth, and who is there to wisely step in when the time is right. As Coco told this part of the birth story, I pictured these three women, with Coco as the spearhead, along with her two midwives flanking either side. Supporting her, keeping her safe, but always recognizing Coco's lead. That's what this relationship is all about.And finally, a word on integration. Coco's journey from first pregnancy through her most recent birth has been full of ups and downs. Triumph and troubles. And labor is a microcosm of this very experience. I loved her labor depiction. "I am an ocean." Oceans are many things. Mighty, flowing, majestic, serene, cataclysmic, and tranquil. What a wonderful analogy for the process of integration. Taking all of the aspects of her journey thus far-- breaking them down and then building them back up together. Letting it all wash over her in waves. And like waves, the integration of an experience ebbs and flows. It's not all at once. But this ability to take our experience and pull it into our being-- absorbing the meaning and allowing it to transform us-- that is an abundant gift to ourselves and our families alike.
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When you've had a hospital birth but your epidural failed, why not bring it on home for baby #2? This week we're speaking to Brianna, who did just that-- decided to head home after the frustrating experience of a failed epidural. We'll hear how she was able to tap into her intuition and her primal instincts to make her homebirth a wonderful success. Episode Roundup: Brianna experienced the intensity of labor with her first birth, as her epidural migrated and failed. Because she had expected to HAVE the epidural to cope, she struggled through her active labor and transition. However, what I find amazing is that when she gave birth at home, pain was a non-issue. Simply having coping skills available to her and knowing how to let her body do the work allowed her to experience a FUN, joyful birthing experience.I also loved the way that Brianna invited her daughter, Ella in to her birth experience with her second baby. Ella was able to come in and see her mother give birth to her new baby sister. Brianna mentioned that she hopes her daughter will remember this experience, and I agree. I want to encourage those of you who have young children at your births to remember to tell them the story! Turn it into family lore! My daughter tells me little details about the time that she watched me give birth to her baby sister. "Remember when I tried to get in the pool," she'll say. Now, whether or not she actually fully remembers the event itself or the retelling and retelling of it-- does it really matter? In her mind, it's solidified as a beautiful, joyous strong experience. We have the ability to use storytelling to help our children understand the beauty of birth, whether they fully remember or not. Honestly, whether they're even present or not! Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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Sleeping with your baby-- we've probably all done it once or twice, but is it actually safe? This week we're speaking with Taylor Kulik. Taylor is an occupational therapist and holistic sleep and parenting educator who developed a passion for helping new mothers overcome their sleep-related fears and helping them get back to trusting in their intuition. She provides radical re-education about how babies and children should sleep, and offers holistic and responsive sleep support to parents who do not want to sleep train. I know the topic of sleep can feel extremely sensitive to many, so know that this information is provided with love and respect, and it's given as an option for those who want or need it. Please remember the opinions of my guest may not necessarily reflect my own and vice versa, and this show is not medical advice-- it's an educational tool-- so continue to take empowered responsibility for your health and your family. Episode RoundupOur communities are no longer designed in a way that is supportive to childrearing as a whole, truly. We're extremely silo'd and so unbelievably busy. On top of this, mothers are inundated with the message that they can have it all and they can do it all. They can lose the baby weight, sleep all night, work all day and come home and take care of their home and babies with love and compassion. This just isn't realistic. When we realize that we've been fed a lie, we can slowly begin to untangle ourselves from it, step by step. One of the best first steps that we may be able to make is reconsidering how we view infant sleep, as Taylor shared.The lack of safety in sleeping with our babies comes with not being provided information on how to do it. There is, however, information out there to help you respond to your baby's nighttime needs, while also supporting your ability to get more rest, too. Taylor is doing a phenomenal job of sharing this information.And finally, let's remember that we are our child's regulator. We get to be our child's regulator-- their safe, snuggly, trusted space. If we can approach this with the perspective that this not a curse, but a gift-- we can enjoy these young years, acknowledge that there will sometimes be struggle... there will sometimes be difficulty, give ourselves and our babies grace.This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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What does it look like to take charge of your birth experience after a previously disempowering one? This week, we'll be speaking with McKenzie, a mother to two children and student from The Homebirth Collective--with two very different pregnancy and birth stories. We'll learn how McKenzie's first pregnancy and birth laid a groundwork for questioning herself, yet how that's absolutely not the end of her story-- and what she did to change her experience of pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Episode Roundup The way that we feel about ourselves and our experience in pregnancy is extremely related to our birth experience, our postpartum and our motherhood journey. McKenzie's pregnancy with her daughter Cora involved care providers who left her feeling uncertain about herself, her decisions, her ability to give birth and mother her baby.... all of this dynamic was already in play before she even headed to the hospital to have her baby. When the nurse asked, "do you want to try to push?" Her mind immediately began to question, "Well, should I? Surely someone should tell me..." This type of care is so common, and I truly believe that it leads so many mothers to question themselves on all kinds of matters when the truth is that YOU KNOW. You know your body and baby more than anyone else ever could. You are not a small piece of this puzzle... you ARE the puzzle. When McKenzie switched to homebirth and midwife-attended care with her second child, she began to truly embody this reality, which led to starkly different choices, feelings, and experiences. She shared how because of where she is mentally and in her heart, she's able to navigate through the challenges of motherhood with more grace, ease and fluidity than ever before. It's amazing to hear such an undeniable change. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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Have you ever felt like you were seeing a revolving door of different doctors throughout your pregnancy? HOW can you feel confident and comfortable with the provider if it just. keeps. changing? This week we're speaking with Shayna- a mother to two precious boys, one born in the hospital and one at home. We'll hear how Shayna dealt with switching doctors in her first pregnancy, and how a revolving door of doctors in her second pregnancy sent her seeking the continuity and CARE of a midwife. As you prepare for YOUR homebirth, I want to remind you that my desire is to serve you as deeply as possible. While so many mothers gain so much from this podcast, a totally free resource, I know that many of you are seeking deeper preparation. That's exactly what we do inside of Happy Homebirth Academy and The Homebirth Collective. I give you a clear-cut framework for preparing for your homebirth, or preparing for your homebirth AND the transformation into motherhood. No wondering if you have what you need. No stone goes unturned. Click the link in the show notes to join, and don't forget to apply the code PODCAST at checkout for 10% for being a listener of the show. Episode Roundup How amazing was that? As we head into this week's episode roundup, I want to ask you- how do you think it impacts our transition into motherhood to be supported continuously by the same person, or the same small group of people, as opposed to a massive conglomerate of doctors who may or may not know anything about you? I think we can all agree that the sacredness of this transition into motherhood is deserving of respect and individualization. Without continuity of care, it's sure hard to truly receive either. If you're on the fence about how you want to give birth, keep this in mind as you consider your options and seek care. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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Did you know that you can use your birth to deeply unite your family unit? Today we're speaking with Anna, a mother of three precious children with a bend towards all things holistic. Anna and her husband decided to use their third birth experience as a catalyst for the entire family-- truly restructuring the way that they experienced parenthood and the culture that they wanted to present to their family. I can't wait for you to hear how this played out. Anna was a student inside of The Homebirth Collective, and it was so powerful to watch her grow and prepare for this birth experience. Now, being on the other side, I feel honored to have been able to support her into her newest, strongest version of motherhood. If this is what you're looking for in your life, I would LOVE to have you inside of The HBC. Click the link in the show notes to join today, and use the code PODCAST for 10% off at checkout. Episode RoundupFor many in the mainstream, it can be easy to be fooled into the belief that complexity is akin to safety. The hospital system- with its procedures, its protocols, its uniforms and medications- it can provide an, unfortunately, false sense of superiority to simplicity. To allowing our bodies to do exactly what they were designed to do- exactly how they were designed to do it. When we put our trust in a medical complex instead of our own brilliant innate physical intelligence, we almost always leave something beautiful on the table.Next, this very same system... it so frequently minimizes the magnificence of birth. And how can it not? It's a routine. It's a job. The goal is to prevent disaster, not to allow for transformation and beauty. When this is the environment we're in, it can be easy to miss the absolute wonder of what you've just experienced. If you find yourself in a hospital, be sure to remember that even though this is a regular day for your OB or midwife, it's a day of life-change for you. Do not let them downplay the magnificence of what has just happened.And finally, let's end where we began. Birth is a family event. It can involve your little ones, and it can serve as a catalyst to a new way of being together. I always say that birth is magnetic-- may it pull you all together-- never to be separated. Before we go, I wanted to mention that Anna has started a blog. To learn more from her beautiful wisdom, be sure to follow along at: PARA SIEMPRE This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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Has your perception of an event ever changed after a period of time? If so, how did that impact your future decision-making? And today we're speaking with Bree Darby. Bree is a mama of two girls, 4 years and 3 months, and a bonus mom of one boy, 11. She is a working/stay-at-home mom in the suburbs of Philadelphia who spends her time outside of work exercising, enjoying the outdoors, or spending time with her family. After a hospital birth filled with interventions, she was determined to have the un-disturbed, unmedicated birth she longed for with her first, and she knew that homebirth was the way to go. Throughout pregnancy, Bree overcame the struggle of harnessing her power to overcome the fear of homebirth through education and exercise. As you prepare for YOUR homebirth, I want to remind you that my desire is to serve you as deeply as possible. While so many mothers gain so much from this podcast, a totally free resource, I know that many of you are seeking deeper preparation. That's exactly what we do inside of Happy Homebirth Academy and The Homebirth Collective. I give you a clear-cut framework for preparing for your homebirth, or preparing for your homebirth AND the transformation into motherhood. No wondering if you have what you need. No stone goes unturned. Click the link in the show notes to join, and don't forget to apply the code PODCAST at checkout for 10% for being a listener of the show. Episode Roundup: How cool was that? Hearing mothers gain education and make new choices never gets old to me! As we head into this week's episode roundup, one big thought is coming to my mind: Sometimes our perception of an experience may change with time. When Bree had her first daughter, she didn't consider her care to be anything but normal. However, as time passed and she gained education, she realized that there were aspects of her care that she no longer appreciated. If this is you, I want to remind you that this is totally okay. AND... we have the option to gain new information, recognize that we would do things differently next time, and yet not condemn ourselves for previous decisions or think "wow, if only I had done xyz instead..." We are all learning and growing, and as we do that, our opinions and choices may change. Let's embrace that and move forward with confidence, just like Bree. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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What happens when becoming pregnant goes from being quick and easy to long, emotional and difficult? This week, we're speaking with Shyla Brown, a mother of 4 babes- 3 of whom were born at home. We'll walk through Shyla's experiences of pregnancy, which range from fast and unexpected to long-awaited while she struggled with secondary infertility. Shyla will share what she learned from that experience and the pelvic therapy that made SUCH a massive difference for her. And for those of you who are interested, that information is in the show notes, so go check it out! Shyla was a student of mine inside of The Homebirth Collective while she prepared for her fourth baby. While she'd already had 3 births under her belt, Shyla knew that she wanted to re-enter birth and motherhood differently-- more sacredly-- this time around. And that's where the HBC came in. If you're looking to prepare for both your homebirth and the deep foundations of your sacred motherhood experience, I hope you'll join me inside of The HBC. The link is in the show notes, and you can use the code PODCAST for 10% at checkout. Episode Roundup What an incredible journey Shyla has been on. As we head into this week's episode roundup, I want to focus on the hope and joy that came alongside the pain of Shyla's struggle with secondary infertility. She did not give up on her dream of more children, she continued to learn and search, and she found such an amazing resource. There was so much pain in the losses she experienced, both of babies and her father, but there was a rainbow, indeed. And even moreso, I love that Shyla, CONTINUED to focus on her emotional healing after her third birth. When she became unexpectedly pregnant with Ulysses, baby #4, she knew she needed to take her mental and emotional preparation seriously, and that's exactly what she did inside of The Homebirth Collective. She didn't have to bring the hurt and sadness of her previous experiences into her birth, and that made all the difference. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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How do we encourage optimal growth of our bodies and the bodies of our babies in pregnancy and birth? What are the foundational pieces to this? This week we're speaking with Margaret Barry. After a history of restrictive dieting and over-exercising, Margaret decided to seek out a better understanding of physiology that goes beyond the unsustainable diets and quick fixes commonly promoted in the women’s health world. After successfully resolving her digestive issues, hormonal imbalances, and healing her relationship with food and exercise, Margaret completed her Functional Nutritional Therapy Practitioner training in 2014 and immediately started working with clients. Her Motherhood journey began with an intervention-heavy hospital birth of her daughter, after which she went on to have her second child- a son- at home, in a full-circle redemption of her own autonomy. Over the years, she has continued to expand her knowledge base with a wide range of additional certifications, including HTMA (hair tissue mineral analysis) functional blood chemistry, fascia fitness, perinatal corrective exercise, and lymphatic exercise. She specializes in mineral balancing, women’s metabolic health, and fascia-focused exercise. Margaret is passionate about helping women feel strong, energetic, comfortable, and confident in their bodies. She works with clients via her group programs, courses, and classes. Episode Roundup How amazing is it to speak with someone who is so well-rounded in all of the systems that so deeply support our health in pregnancy, birth and motherhood? As we head into today's episode roundup, I really just want to take a moment of gratitude for the exposure of these concepts. When we learn this kind of information, it may be the default to think, "UGH! Why didn't I know this before... this could have helped xyz...." And I totally understand that, because I've certainly felt it. But even moreso... how exciting to know now. How exciting to learn about our minerals, our lymph, our fascia, our bodies... so that we CAN become more aware stewards, and that we can influence our children's lives, whether they've yet to be conceived or they're already 25. This information is powerful, and we can use it with excited optimism. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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How can we lean into the primal nature of birth and experience it as the full right of passage that it was designed to be? Today we're speaking with Karey, a stay-at-home, soon to be homeschooling mom of three. In this episode, we'll uncover the work that Karey did, particularly between her second and third birth, that led to a deeper understanding of the transformative power that birth holds for those who seek. Episode RoundupWe talk about communication being extremely important, and Karey's story truly highlighted this. She and her husband Matthew truly spent time before their third birth working on communicating with one another about their hopes and desires of the event. This so clearly paid off in their experience together, and this birth was an extremely magnetizing event- pulling them even closer together.I love how Karey brought up this concept of the sanitization and sterilization of birth. You know, in the medical world, it seems as though the goal is to totally subdue the experience of birth. To pretend that #1, nothing can go wrong when in the hospital (which, of course we know isn't realtiy) but also to #2 prevent mothers from feeling...from EXPRESSING. Birth is meant to be expressive for goodness sake. But because of the way society has repressed this from mothers for so long, it often times takes deep exploration before birth to feel comfortable with this in the moment.And finally, there is so much power in our perspective. After her extremely in tense car birth at 70 miles per hour, Karey was left feeling uncertain about her experience. Between working with The Birth Story Doula and unpacking her feelings even further inside of the HBC, Karey is now able to look back on those events with a totally different perspective. And she was able to enter her third birth with an open mind and the feeling that this birth was going to be beautiful- and it sure was! Tag @thebirthstorydoulaThis Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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When birth goes well in all of the physical ways, does that necessarily mean that it carried the emotional depth you desired? This week we're speaking with Cortney Steffensmeier. Cortney is the mother of 3 littles who ignited her passion for breastfeeding and maternal postpartum support. After working for nearly 10 years in western medicine, Cortney received a deeper calling to stay home with her babies while cultivating a network for her local moms. She is an IBCLC, postpartum doula, and CFT provider. All three of her birth stories are quite different, with the common denominator being the Lord's goodness throughout each labor. She's here to shed light on how she came into her own and began to advocate for her dream birth over the years. Ultimately, we'll hear how she achieved the birth she wholeheartedly desired. Episode Roundup 1. It’s common for the perception of birth that we had growing up to be counterproductive when it comes to preparing for our own birth. Cortney shared how she had never witnessed an unmedicated birth before having her second baby, and the only image she had of birth was from the video of her mother’s birth: a large epidural needle and a sterile-looking room did not provide excitement in Cortney’s mind for giving birth herself. If this is all that you have known of birth up until now, I’m so thrilled that you’re here gleaning a new perspective of what birth can be.2. Next, Cortney shared how her third birth experience was an experience that bonded herself to her husband even more than before. Those who witnessed the birth were able to see just how palpable their love was, and even more, they truly represented what it means to be a team together. There's no way that this hasn't carried over into their parenting together. We already know it led into their postpartum, which brings me to point number 3.3. Cortney shared that they finally gave postpartum the attention it deserved this time around. My friends, if there's anything I can share with you, it's that more than likely, your expectations of rest for postpartum need to INCREASE. Cortney and her husband were willing to accept the help of their friends and family when it came to taking care of their little ones, dropping them off and picking them up-- really, receiving help in all of its forms. They recognized the importance of those first weeks together solidifying their connection. I pray that you'll take this to heart. This is such a critical practice... I know it isn't always easy, and it may come with its own set of difficulty--how do we prepare to make this even feasible? But please, begin to consider this as early as possible so that you can make it happen to the best of your ability for your family.4. And finally, Cortney's openness and willingness to have friends and loved ones around her during her birth experience was such a gift to those who witnessed. Just like we mentioned at the beginning of the roundup, Cortney had never seen an unmedicated birth before, much less a homebirth... and now she's passing along the beauty of what birth can be to all those who were in attendance. Community birth. What a blessing. This Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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Surrendering to Physiological Birth and Motherhood with Jessica Livengood What does it mean to surrender to your birth experience? To surrender to motherhood? This week's episode, we'll be speaking to my friend and Homebirth Collective student Jessica about her experiences with surrender in birth and motherhood. This conversation is so deep and SO useful- I know you're going to gain amazing insight from it. Before we jump in, I want to share how deeply this concept relates to what we learn inside of The Homebirth Collective. You may wonder-- what makes The HBC different from other childbirth education? And the answer is that it's not strictly childbirth education. Yes, it's that, but it's so much more. Inside of The HBC we're focusing on the preparation of birth-- physical birth, and the spiritual, mental, emotional birth into motherhood. We spend weeks tending to the primal mother and learning how to lean into what we already have and have been given. If you're looking to use your birth experience as a transformational catalyst into a grounded motherhood, I'd love to have you inside of The HBC. Click the link in the show notes to join, and don't forget to use the code PODCAST for 10% off at checkout. Episode RoundupGoodness, Jessica's story and her perspective of her birth are so beneficial to all of us. As we head into this episode roundup, she's given us so much to mull over.I'd like to start with the fact that Jessica has very clearly considered her birth and worked to integrate this experience into herself, her role as a mother and her life as a whole. My friends, this is critical. We talk about this inside of The HBC- the fact that truthfully, it matters less what the events ARE than it does how we INTEGRATE them. Jessica has considered her birth, noted how things unfolded, used her experiences to shape future decisions in motherhood and grown tremendously. This, in my opinion, is the definition of succes.I want to talk about a concept that I really love to flesh out inside of The HBC- this idea of instinct over instruction. When Jessica was shaking her belly and thighs through her waves... WOW. How powerful was this?! This was such a beautiful example of primal movement and intuitive knowing. Her body knew exactly what she needed to do to relax, and chances are it was even deeper than that- her body knew exactly how she needed to move to properly position and align her baby for birth. Our bodies aren't acting randomly. There is purpose to what they are inclined to do-- our biggest task? Get out of the freaking way. Get out of your thinking brain and let your feeling brain kick in. Jessica had to intentionally decide that she was going to continue to do what worked for her-- even in front of her birth team. THAT was the right decision. I love that she shared with this how she realized she was at a crossroads, and she made the decision that was most supportive of her labor, even if it felt awkward the first time she did it.And now- let's chat about what happens when instruction overrides our instinct. Jessica knew that the birthing process would be a time when her brain would be susceptible to outside opinions and instruction, and she learned firsthand how this could unfold. Despite her preparedness to listen to her body and follow her intuition when it came to all aspects of birth, particularly pushing and releasing the baby, she also felt a desire to go along with her midwife's instructions at the end. My friends, I am certainly not questioning the well-meaningness of this care provider, but I do have to remind you that NOBODY is in your body like you are. The reality is that many mothers are NOT as connected and intuitive during birth, because they haven't taken time to reconnect to the primal mother that they are-- but when you HAVE... oh my goodness. Your body knows what to do- your job is to surrender. Instinct over instruction.Talk about SurrenderThis Week's Sponsors:Araza Beauty: Code HOMEBIRTH for 15% offInformed Pregnancy+ Join The Homebirth CollectiveJoin Happy Homebirth AcademyCode PODCAST for 10% off
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