Episoder
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Black men in particular are one of the most objectified groups in porn. Black men are a porn genre, which begs the question of why race is a genreâŠ.BBC is more than just a porn SEO tag, it is a colloquialism, signaling on dating apps and even a proclaimed sexual lifestyle. Though we may think we are idolizing the black male body, where does this notion come from, how is it perpetuated and how do those on the receiving end experience it? King Noir is no stranger to speaking out politically and sexually. Experiencing this objectification first hand in both the music industry and the sex industry, King has navigated these mirroring communities for decades. King helps us decode how the industry dehumanizes porn performers and the ripple effect to marginalized folx outside of the industry.
Find all of King's content on kingnoire.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is King Noire "Hu$tle Matrimony"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
An Educator for Sex Educators? A more and more common question these days as more sexuality professionals emerge is: âHow can I do that too?â The road to becoming a sexuality professional is murky. Even murkier is how to make that career or side-hustle a viable one. Enter Cameron Glover, whose goal is to make your sex ed business as successful as it can be with the Sex Ed Business Academy. Certifications, training programs, mentorship...there isnât one go-to path for all individuals. What makes a Sex Educator good at their job? What makes them âofficialâ and who are we waiting for to grant us those titles? Cameron has us question who content is made for and why so many people have imposter syndrome. Whether youâre interested in the sex-ed field or not, Cameron lays down some business advice thatâs applicable for everyone.
For more of Cameron's work & info on the Sex Ed Business Academy: cameronglover.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice Email us at [email protected]
------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is Fuck Buttons, "Red Wing"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Manglende episoder?
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This week we continue our venture into the world of literotica with someone who can not only call themselves an erotica writer but a sex toy inventor as well. Tabitha Rayne is a decorated writer who draws more on fiction than reality. Penning her dirty words as a way to finesse typing and molding her own rideable toy as a means to get off while her fingers flowed, Tabitha quite literally continues to fall into success. Tabitha brings the fun back into saying, writing and reading certain words. We grill Tabitha on where the bridge between written and spoken dirty words--if at all, how you can get into writing your own smut, and how to use erotica in your own life. PLUS, we continue to ask the age old question: Why were people always hiding porn magazines in bushes?
You can find all of Tabitha's work on tabitharayne.com
and purchase a ruby glow at therubyglow.comIf you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice (or just want to share a story)
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is LAPS "Mojo"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
For all of the visual stimuli we are bombarded with and lack of sexual communication itâs no wonder we are ill equipped to whisper sweet nothings into our persons ear. Enter: Peekaboo Collins. Whether itâs poetry or short stories, Peekaboo weaves a web of syllables and phrases of the lead up, and the in-betweens of every scintillating moment. We learn that not all erotica has to depict fantasy, and how we can rewrite our own stories in the best possible lightâŠ.if we want. From the bathroom blowjob that never happened to a built up childhood crush that ultimately leads to being disappointed, everyone has one of those stories that weâve romanticized or dreamt better than reality. Peekaboo chose to write about it. What are you waiting for, time to finish your own story or create a new one.
You can find Peekaboo's work at peekaboocollins.com and @peekaboocollins
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice (or just want to share a story)
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is Peaches "Talk To Me"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com
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What is a norm and how do you know if youâre willingly or unwillingly abiding by it? By now we know our formative years at least have some influence in our worldview. Does that mean norms are good? Bad? or do they not even matter at all? Porn performer and activist Lync Johnson (@lyncjohnson3x) takes us through his formative years and how his lack of societal influence helped him form norms of his own. From a unique first time experience to rejecting labels, Lyncâs journey down memory lane has us all questioning our societal influences and how norms can be particularly gendered. PLUS a listener gets some words of advice from Julia Koewer (@JuliaKoerwer) LMSW on finding affordable therapy for a new lover.
Follow Lync everywhere: allmylinks.com/lyncjohnson
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is Suicide "Dream Baby Dream"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
By now we all know what consent meansâŠ..or do we? How much do you really know and what can an intimacy coordinator teach you about your current understanding? Alot, it turns out. If you thought consent = permission, this week is for you. Intimacy coordinator Mia Schachter (@miaschachter) graces our presence to boost our understanding of consent and what most people get wrong within their understanding. We can all use a better understanding of consent and how boundaries relate to it both sexually and non-sexually. Mia lets us in on the burgeoning Intimacy Coordinator role, how she came about it, and why she is surprisingly not always well received. Plus we learn what the fuck prosody is, what we can learn from it and why we should all be critical consumers.
You can find more information on Mia's work, upcoming workshops, and her podcast at sharetheloadinc.com.
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is Rival Schools "Hooligans For Life"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com
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What role does film and media play in our love and in our lives? Does culture reflect film or vice versa? This week we are joined by the charismatic Nia Ashley who takes us on her film journey and the media that impacted her life. We reflect on what happened to the era of UPN series and why TV has taken one step forward and three steps back. Nia helps us navigate if we can still love art and artists that we now see through problematic glasses. Nia represents a burgeoning generation eager to create the narratives they so sorely missed.
Find Nia's work at niaashley.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThe end of episode song this week is Thao & The Get Down Stay Down "Pure Cinema"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com
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This week we're joined by southern sexuality superhuman Marla Stewart, whose impressive body of work speaks for itself. Co-founder of the Sex Down South conference, Marla is already making history and a forging new educated era in sex and sexuality. Plus... she loves an uncomfortable conversation as much as we do. From strip club culture to pop culture we discuss how history and geographical location influences cultural upbringing. Oh, and we take a highly academic lens to the impact and significance of WAP.
Follow Marla at: @1marlastewart
Coaching, Workshops & Education: velvetlipssexed.com
And sign up for the upcoming virtual and IRL Sex Down South Conference: sexdownsouth.comIf you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertOur official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com
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Based on the number of pro dommes we've had on this podcast the past few weeks, we need a little reminder that good, old fashioned, fuck yes, traditional sex is still fucking fantastic and fun for all! We are joined this week by Sex Educator and Youtuber Hannah Witton who's advocating for the conventional. Marriage, kids, monogamy. What does it mean to be sexually progressive when you tic so many privileged boxes? How do you handle secret fantasies or masturbating to an ex in a committed relationship? Find out how Hannah sometimes treats her relationship like a job performance review, and why you should too.
Follow Hanna on instagram, youtube, her podcast DOING IT! and check out all her books, content, etc. on Hannawitton.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is The Clean "Tally Ho"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Oh Iâm sorry... did you think we were an good-vibes-all-the-time podcast? Stephens inner goth gets to let loose as we welcome this week's fascinating guest Audrey Fatale. We learn all about the death industry and how Audrey navigated her way through it. Find out what secondary trauma response is, what one learns working at a morgue and in traumatic bereavement, and how sheâs brought alllllll of that into BDSM. From necrophiles to the funeral business,
whether you avoid the topic of death, run right towards it, or you happen to eroticize it - we cover the gamut in this episode of Is Our Love.You can find Audrey Fatale at: mistressfatale.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is the timelessly brilliant but *so* painfully sad Scott Walker "My Death"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Is Our Love Particular? Does our love even know what it wants? Whether youâre ideal pairing is in pay-for-play, a long term partner, or your career we could all take a few notes from Mistress Eva Oh (@youwillplease_me) in patience and consistency. Enter this weekâs episode bursting with logic. Mistress Eva Oh has a particular list of her small life's pleasures and knows exactly how to go about getting them... or punish shortcomings. We could all learn a thing or two from Eva Oh when it comes to being patient and getting satisfaction.
You can find Eva Oh and all her work on eva-oh.com
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is Tiny Deaths "If I'm Dreaming"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Why are femme Dominatrizes more prevalent and heralded than masc Doms? Is there a stigma against masc Doms, particularly cis-male Doms? We discuss why that is and what you can do about it on our latest episode with Master Peter. From swing dancing to switch hitting, Master Peter got into the business sideways and now he is firing from all cylinders. From his time as dungeon monitor, personal relationships, and his clients both couples and singles alike, youâre going to want to learn what puts Master Peter as the creme de la creme and why he is so often sought out in the London scene. Speaking of scenes, Master Peterâs signature teaching tool is gentle dominance. Learn how partnered dance and partnered play have more in common thank youâd think and how YOU can be a better dominant and a better partner.
You can find Master Peter at: masterpeter.co.uk
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is Miss Kittin "Life Is My Teacher"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
What is a dungeon and are they all created similarly? We speak with all around sex worker Adreena Angela on how she doesnât follow all the rules from curating her studio space, how she interacts with clients, and the controversial stance on if Dommes take their tits out. Dungeons and sex work isnât as scary as you would think and Adreena pulls back the veil to let you know some of the best -- and worst messages and experiences she has in her decorated career. PLUS Adreena, Lola and Stephen answer a listener q from a couple interested in approaching a sex worker for a session. Find out all the etiquette and ways to go about making your fantasies a reality, yesâŠ.even in Florida.
You can find more about Mistress Adreena and Inanna Studio at mistressadreena.co.uk
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice :
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is Moses Sumney "Cut Me"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Have you ever had a stereotype projected onto you? Have you ever felt guilty about embodying or identifying with a stereotype of your ethnicity or otherwise? These conversations may not be easy but theyâre absolutely necessary. This week we welcome Rebecca Carvalho to discuss her relationship with her ethnicity as it relates to her sexuality and how this comes into play throughout her dating life and interaction with porn. Latinx people covers a WIDE range of persons. Rebecca uses her personal journey as well as learning about her roots and past, including reconciling with a shame of embodying some of the common stereotypes. PLUS Stephen and Lola answer an advice question about squirting that isnât really about squirting at all!
Follow Rebecca on Insta @rebeccaecarvalho
or find her at rebeccaecarvalho.comIf you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice :
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is Ricky Martin, "Shake Your Bon-Bon" because holy shit that really happened once upon a time.
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com
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Do you remember getting the talk? Who gave it to you? How would you give âthe talk?â Easier said than done. This weekâs guest Jet Setting Jasmine is not only walking the walk but talking THE 'talk'. Jasmine is a mother of three and can add therapist, pornographer and domme to her extensive resume. Jasmine schools us on the sex positive parenting playbook that doesnât exist, answering questions like: When do you start introducing topics of sex to your children and how you go about doing it? Do you have to be comfortable with your own sexuality to be able to provide them with a quality âtalk?â Does it have to be awkward? Above all, how do we keep our children safe while enabling them to explore sexuality in a healthy manner? PLUS we talk to Jasmine about how to educate your kids on looooove.
Find everything Jet Setting Jasmine on: jsjlinks.com (or, like she says, just google her)
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice :
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is Madison McFerrin "TRY"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Does it seem like everyone is talking about open relationships and polyamory lately? Is non-monogamy actually better? Who is it for? Does non-monogamy mean you have more sex? And why does it have so many syllables? Ruby Rare joins us this week to spell out the shades of non-monogamy from A-Z. Whether youâre already considering non-monogamy or you want some applicable learnings for your future relationships, this episode has relatable bits of wisdom for everyone - monogamous or not. PLUS, Stephen, Lola and Ruby give some advice to a pleasure seeking individual struggling to achieve orgasm with a partner.
Follow Ruby on Instagram: @rubyrare
If you're in need of sex, love or relationship advice :
Email us at [email protected]------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is a throwback: The Rapture "Open Up Your Heart"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Did you know you have a pelvic floor? Yes, all of you. Do you know what is does? Spoiler Alert: EVERYTHING. Rachel Gelman a San Francisco based Pelvic Floor Therapist joins us this week to tell us everything from the 411 on kegals to why a good bowel movement can make your week.
Whether you had no idea that the hammock in your pelvis was responsible for your orgasms AND your urination or youâve been trying to kegel your way to the heavy weights - thereâs always something new to learn. Trust us: youâre going to want to get a notebook for this ep. PLUS Stephen, Lola, and Rachel give some advice to a vortex of vaginal odor & erectile difficulty shame.
You can find the extensive list of resources Rachel mentioned here:
www.painperceptionproject.com/patients
& you can find Rachel's practice on instagram: @pelvichealthsfAs always, if you're finding yourself in need sex, love or relationship advice :
Email us at [email protected] ... if we can't help we'll be happy to search for a trained professional.------~ Follow us on social media ~-------
The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertThis weeks' end of episode song is the Soulwax remix of Hot Chip's "Ready For The Floor"
Our official theme songs were lovingly composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Rebelling against your Pagan family by joining a church... this isnât your average darling come porn performer coming of age tale. From the industry trying to pigeon hole a multi-racial gal as âlatina,â to diversifying her porn profile Liv Revamped drops some wisdom for any aspiring porn performers about how sheâs stayed fresh with over a decade of performing sex on camera. We learn pros vs. cons, working indie vs. contract, and discuss porns' rampant streaming evolution PLUS Stephen, Lola and Liv give virginal advice for first time sex!
Follow Liv at livrevamped.com and @bish.izbak on Instagram
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The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertEnd of Episode music feature this week is Blossom Dearie "Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea"
Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
Everyone and their step-sibling seems to be making their own bootleg smut these days. Is there room for a new era of porn graduated form the yesteryears of gonzo? Is there a difference between porn and erotica? And above all - how does one transition from growing up in a sex cult to creating responsible porn?
Frustrated by a lack of quality heterosexual porn that spoke to her, one-woman-show Inka Winter set out to make her own with For Play Films. We find out about the process that goes into each scene and how Inka selects her talent.
As if Inka wasnât already productively putting us all to shame, this director is adding âsex therapistâ to her list of accomplishments truly ushering in a new era of porn.
Find all of Inka's films at forplayfilms.com, which is currently running free memberships. You can also follow @forplayfilms on socials, and subscribe to her educational series "Sexucation" on YouTube.
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The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertEnd of Episode music feature this week is Pom Pom Squad "Red With Love"
Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com -
"I have caffeine, nicotine⊠and the conversationâs all over the place just like I like it.â - Stoya
This week is the conclusion of our 2 part conversation with Stoya. We dive right in. If you havenât listened to pt.1 ⊠well, youâre doing it wrong.
We talk balancing love, a career in adult film, and how the modern world forced her to become an expert in costuming & disaster-preparedness. We discuss Stoya's tween years spent researching sexuality, bdsm, & evolutionary biology at her local library. Plus Stephen and Stoya get a bit of closure rehashing their relationship. Stories abound. We hope you enjoy it.
Hear Stoya & Stephensâ conversation about Unicorning (and other groupsex experiences) on the upcoming issue of Zerospaces.com and follow Stoya on Twitter & Instagram @stoya
If you'd like advice on sex, love, or relationships you can always email us at [email protected] ... (PS you can also email Stoya & her advice column 'How To Do It' at [email protected])
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The show: @isourlove_____
Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom
Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com
Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpertExit music for this episode is Tom Waits "You Can Never Hold Back Spring"
Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com - Vis mere
