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Babies…why is it so hard to say no? Jess and Caroline are going to break it down. First up, saying no to an old friend who you don’t vibe with anymore. Second, how to say no to your mom when she’s pushing religion on you. Third, how to say no to…yourself. They talk dynamics, they talk showing up calmly, they talk boundaries. And they push back when necessary.
Plus, are they really scientists? They discuss a few lighter topics like stretching, pigeons (!?), and Jess gives her own example of saying no recently—and how that was turned on its head. We’re all not for everyone; “no” is a central part of the phrase.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Who’s ready to get meta?! Jess and Caroline reflect on their podcast partnership—on their growth, their dynamic, and their challenges. They answer one of their most-asked questions: what was the process of picking each other as podcast partners? And liken the experience to a marriage.
They discuss how they work out dilemmas in their personal relationships, the contrast between problem solving and listening, and how pausing during an argument can help people articulate better. Plus, a complaint about DNA and a *real* group therapy update. Thanks for coming along on the ride!
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
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Happy Halloween! Let’s complain about it. Jess opens the episode with a specific fall issue that needs to be aired, Caroline talks the dynamics of crafting, and then the two commiserate over their clumsiness, which has resulted in the breaking of sentimental items. Plus, neighborly decorum, coffee shop decorum, and airport decorum are discussed in the face of a few annoying experiences.
Things get deep when Jess brings up a friend who ghosted her years ago, who’s suddenly reappeared in Jess’s life. When can we relent on boundaries? And when is the excuse “I’ve had a lot going on” actually justified? Plus, we’ve got a group therapy “update,” thoughts on a nice review, and some sports thoughts! You got that right—we’re now a traveling basketball/lacrosse tour. Go team!
https://open.spotify.com/show/1s4vovGkxJZI1JVtXiR0OtThis episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
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Who has two thumbs, hosts a podcast, and is ready to put their own advice to use? Jess and Caroline! C takes us through two boundaries she set this past week and how she felt doing it, and J discusses the ups and downs of moving in with her partner. Hypotheses are nothing without experiments!
Plus, the pair ruminate on decorating with a partner and the language of design, before diving into thoughts on an upcoming group therapy session for C. And don’t miss their brief discussion on haunted forests and Medieval Times…lots of big kahunas in this episode.
P.S. Listen to Amanda Montell’s Magical Overthinkers podcast, wherever you get yours!
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
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This week the lover is alone in a hotel room with the sniffles, and she just needs a little bit of self care time. Away from the stressors of home ownership and work dinners, it's just her and your topic submissions tonight.
First, a WHATADO on setting boundaries with parents - which Jess decides to treat as an opportunity to challenge the listener in question. Sure sure, boundaries shmoundaries, but are you being honest with yourself? The projection continues as Jess reflects on recent conflicts in which "I" statements were not in use, then dives into the nuances of deciding whether or not to be a parent. But a solo episode from the lover wouldn't be complete without a number of lukewarm takes and complaints, mostly on the topic of food.
Please be good to yourselves - it be hard out here lately 💜
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This episode was produced by your lover, Jess DeBakey.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
This episode is sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to https://www.zocdoc.com/notforeveryone/ to try it today.
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This is an episode of complaints, and it starts out with a new long-titled segment about places where people are not allowed to take videos, lest they suffer Caroline’s wrath. Jess chimes in with Instagram stories that are not allowed, and then the pair wonder together why more women don’t name children after themselves.
Then, a listener WHATADO about how to work with a friend who can’t stop talking about their toxic relationship. What’s the best route for a friend who cares? Plus, we’ve got a Botox story, and thoughts on “spicy” self care and bad medical experiences. We’ll do anything to get this scientific information to you!
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
Montage music:
Titan by Alex-Productions | https://onsound.eu/
Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com
Creative Commons / Attribution 3.0 Unported License (CC BY 3.0)
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Ever heard of micro acts of feminism? No? Well consider that problem solved because Jess and Caroline have all the details. Listen in on to find out what that even means, how they define their relationships to feminism, how they own their strengths, and how we can learn from the women around us.
Things get a little spicy later on as Caroline takes us through an intimacy delight adventure tip, which leads into a conversation about the saga of orgasming, and a listener’s thoughts on sex with men vs. sex with women. Plus, ever heard of an Irish Goodbye? There won’t be any prolonged hugs here, no plans made, no quick catch-ups even though you’re heading to the door—we’ll just see you next week, kooks.
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Anyone else feeling lost when it comes to their career? Well, lucky for you, Jess and Caroline know just WHATADO. The duo cover how much to sacrifice when trying to change careers, coworkers who don’t work and complain anyway, how to deal with a loss of passion, interview strategies, and how to know when it’s time to move on.
Plus, Jess confesses to a mistake made on Slack, and Caroline has a hot take about eating in the shower. Best of all, this recording was done in person, and there sure was an animal attack right in the middle of it. You’ll know it when you hear it. Sigh, is it lunchtime yet?
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Visit skims.com and let them know we sent you! Select Not For Everyone after checkout.
Get up to 40% off at cozyearth.com/NOTFOREVERYONE. Use code NOTFOREVERYONE.
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People with sleep issues, raise your hands! Jess and Caroline talk all things sleep, from weird and wild Zoloft dreams to their insomniac partners to a new life-changing sleep schedule. This leads to a deeper conversation about dealing with their own discomfort when it comes to other people’s pain.
Then, a WHATADO: how do you handle a friendship breakup with someone you aren’t actually that close to? Friend groups are tricky, and Jess and Caroline discuss their own experiences dealing with those dynamics. Plus, look out for some idioms, a new Jessism, emotional support items, and a surprising new placement for Botox. Sweet dreams, kooks!
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
This episode is sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to https://www.zocdoc.com/notforeveryone/ to try it today.
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It’s Hater Hour, babies! Caroline takes us through the many steps in her career path this week, with key takeaways along the way. She covers using disparate skills to create something new, the logistics of quitting your day job, and how to sit in discomfort to make your dreams happen.
She also provides some deep takes on what “passion” even means when it comes to your work, cultivating hobbies, and how trying something for fun can lead to unexpected outcomes. If you’re caught between passion and responsibility, this one’s for you.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Get up to 40% off at cozyearth.com/notforeveryone. Use code NOTFOREVERYONE.
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After the long weekend, Jess and Caroline have important business to cover. They’re circling back on the F/M/K situation from last week (with new, helpful info!), on Jess’s difficult conversation, and on Jess’s hack for saving money. But that’s not all on this assortment of matters: they also discuss weird baby names, mispronunciations, and why moving sucks so bad.
But it’s not over yet! Caroline has done some internet sleuthing and she has a report ready for you, featuring evidence, statistics, and names. Then the duo tackle a WHATADO that questions how appropriate it is to continue dating someone who’s set off that little alarm in the back of your head. Is a cheater always a cheater? The answer may surprise you.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Shop now at https://skims.com/. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows.
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Anyone else feeling wormy? Jess and Caroline are, but that doesn’t stop them from going hard off the bat on a WHATADO about a listener’s boyfriend and best friend hanging out way too much. They discuss what setting boundaries really means, embracing anger, and knowing there will be discomfort when you say what you need.
After a brief intermission where a F/M/K situation is parsed out, Jess talks about an impending hard conversation, and Caroline gives her best advice about facing fear, taking notes, and naming the hard part up front. What’s NFE without a little giggle at the end? Enjoy a time Caroline put her foot in her mouth…and the role play for how she’ll fix it. Xoxo fellow worms!
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Get up to 40% off at cozyearth.com/notforeveryone. Use code NOTFOREVERYONE.
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It’s getting hot in here, so gather up your clothes…and get rid of them? Before diving into hot takes, Jess and Caroline talk budget hacks and clothing degradation, culminating in a few ideas for beating the consumerist mindset and some thoughts on what indulging really means.
And then, the main event: hot takes galore. Jess and Caroline argue, research, and kook out about emotional support animals, finding yourself, the name Lowery, what qualifies as evening, emails, sleeping on top of the comforter, and trendy terms that drive them crazy. Plus, it’s not mid-2024 if there’s no discussion of what qualifies as Brat Summer. It’s so confusing sometimes to be a girl.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
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Good morning, kooks! Jess and Caroline start this week’s episode off with a nightmare date story featuring the Spy Museum in DC, a forgotten triple-date memory, a very fortunate run-in with a listener, and the most unexpected (or perfectly on brand?) pump-up music you’ll ever encounter.
In true Not For Everyone fashion, things get deep when Jess asks Caroline how often she cries. They discuss why we cry, emotional hangovers, and therapy approaches involving the wise mind and the inner child. Plus, the two close the loop on a lost term and a workplace dilemma. And, the pod gets an unexpected shoutout…of the Biblical variety. Amen?
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
This episode is sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to https://www.zocdoc.com/notforeveryone/ to try it today.
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Your fav duo is back and more upset about things than ever. A WHATADO about a husband being too flirty with friends leads Jess and Caroline to discussions about gray areas in asking people out, partners hanging out with people of the opposite sex, and the difference between conversations and ultimatums. They might even rethink their initial stances on this one.
Plus, a new fable, “How the Mean Man at the Gym Became a Sweetie Pie,” has Jess and Caroline ruminating on letting people do things for you, love languages, and helping others feel a sense of purpose. We’re about to sing you a lullaby, so get cozy.
*Trigger warning: suicide from 1:07:25 throughout the remainder of episode.
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
Montage Music:Child Dreams by Keys of Moon | https://soundcloud.com/keysofmoonMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution 3.0 Unported License (CC BY 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Dear listener,Enclosed is a letter from the heart. It contains: • Advice on that friend who won't refund you for a trip you could no longer make • A reminder that almost every relationship let-down is more gradual than it feels in real time • A mindset shift that will help you build and maintain more fulfilling friend groups • The worst TikTok advice out there, and how to flip it to be semi-usefulPlus, stories of love and back shots - from your host Jess herself, as well from your fellow kooks (who are sometimes wiser than the ones doing all the talking). If you're lucky, Abraham Lincoln may even show up.Sincerely,Your lover__This episode was produced by the resident lover here at NFE, Jess DeBakey. __Share with a friend!Follow, rate, and review on your favorite podcasting app!Subscribe on YOUTUBE for full episode video: https://www.youtube.com/@Not4EveryonePodPlus follow us on INSTAGRAM for more:https://www.instagram.com/not4everyonepod/https://www.instagram.com/thegoodsitter/https://www.instagram.com/jzdebakey/And don't forget about our MERCH store: https://not4everyonepod.myshopify.com/__Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA__DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support
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This episode is sponsored by Shopify. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com/notforeveryone/.___This week, Jess and Caroline add to a conversation that seems to affect just about everyone: body image. They go through some listener DMs and cover topics like acknowledging the variability of body image, accepting your body when you’re chronically ill, and how to deal with family members who can’t stop talking about your weight.
Plus, a few takes on how body hindsight is 20/20, how food morality can be damaging, and how you can’t talk someone out of an eating disorder. They also offer some concrete strategies for loving yourself, including being your own body-talk bestie, admiring other people’s bodies, and focusing on more important aspects about yourself. It’s a sweet one, babies—let Jess and Caroline cuddle you and remind you of how special you are, physical form aside.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
Welcome back to Not For Everyone, where this week, Jess and Caroline think people need to cool it. They discuss how people don’t know how to be properly annoyed anymore, how people can’t stop demeaning Americans on the internet, and how people go insane in the comment sections.
This leads to some deeper conversations about how we get lost in what a love story “should” look like, a Sex and the City dating fallacy, and why throwing shade isn’t actually that bad. Plus, we get to the meat of great conversation starters—and how sometimes the most unexpected topics create hours of conversation. Like this podcast! So meta.__
This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
In today’s episode, we’ve got just about every Segment™ in the book for you. Jess and Caroline’s scientific minds put together a theory on attractiveness, a reason we say “you know?” so much, and a realistic take on disappointing people. Also, there’s a NEW segment, folks: Lady Snapple Facts, the first of which brings an often forgotten revelation about wearing skirts in public.
Plus, a WHATADO: let’s say the first date was great, sparks flying, humor matching, conversation flowing...and then the second feels like a big swing and a miss. Jess and Caroline have OPINIONS, using some early dating stories to make their points. They then round out the episode with a complaint anyone can get behind: people just *existing* at the airport. Talk about a space that’s truly not for everyone.
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/not4everyonepod/support -
This episode is sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to zocdoc.com/notforeveryone/ to try it today.
This episode is sponsored by Shopify. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com/notforeveryone/.
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It’s Hater Hour, kooks—and Caroline is ready to bear it all. She jumps into a WHATADO about a deep friend betrayal: can they make it right? Or do you have to cut your losses? Caroline shares first hand examples of similar situations, offers some ideas for helping friends who are in manipulative situations, and tells us how to identify signs that you might be in the grips of a master manipulator.
Plus, a WHATADO about getting closure from a not-so-great partner, and another WHATADO about dating someone who is super great at everything…except making stimulating conversation. Take a walk on the hater side. You’ll be pleasantly surprised at how much there is to love.
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Video on closure Caroline referenced: https://youtu.be/y0xShs1P950?si=QBxOWUcrRzj982jW&t=755
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This episode was produced by our prince, Abi Newhouse.
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Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
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DISCLAIMER: All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or health professionals, or professional of any kind, really. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
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