Episoder
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First things first, let’s celebrate the success of the July 2020 Relationship Breakthrough Retreat. This was the first RBR we did online. We reached so many more people than past in-person breakthrough retreats. We delivered multiple breakthroughs, and we were so happy to see people achieve great results.
We are reimagining several of our programs to better serve you and we have several releases coming out this fall. One of them is the Relationship Development Parenting Program. It has three courses for you in the program - the 14-day boost program, the quick start program, and the yearlong program.
With that said, we’ve retired the 2nd edition of the Relationship Breakthrough Quickstart Program. We are also creating a brand new Relationship Breakthrough Program that will be launching on September 23rd. We are so excited about this because the new program is completely reimagined with some awesome new features.
The other huge announcement we want to make is that we will be holding, for the first time ever, a 2nd Relationship Breakthrough Retreat in a year in December. We’ve always wanted to hold two RBR events in a year and it is unbelievable that this year we’ll finally be able to do that.
Key Takeaways
Celebrating the success of the July 2020 Relationship Breakthrough Retreat (02:45)Reimagining several of our programs to better serve you (07:07)The exciting new Relationship Development Parenting Program (07:34)How to get the RD Parenting Boost Program as a bonus (13:24)Retiring the 2nd edition of the Relationship Breakthrough Quickstart Program and creating a new Quickstart Program (15:58)Holding a 2nd Relationship Breakthrough Retreat in a year for the first time ever in December (23:17)Taking our Relationship Development Methodology to as many families as we can (39:32)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will share a talk that they recently had with their Relationship U students on what is going on in real life today behind closed doors when couples and families are stuck together because of the COVID-19 related self-quarantining. Paul and Stacey have been working very hard in sharing amazing tools and strategies on what people can do to avoid kerfuffles and all sorts of negative issues in their households, but it’s very hard for anyone to really tell just how effective they are. So they decided to share the raw, vulnerable, and real life testimonies of families that are successfully implementing those tools and strategies.
One such testimony came from Joe and Adriana, a couple that has really benefited immensely from Paul and Stacey’s programs. The two have been married for 33 years, are empty nesters, and have been navigating the quarantine together so well despite the fact that a few years ago they could not even be in the same room together for even a few minutes. They’ve been having meals together, going out for walks every day, watching shows or plays, and doing many other fun things together. They had previously been separated for a year and a half, but finding Paul and Stacey’s programs changed everything, and now they are a true testament to just how effective Paul and Stacey’s tools and strategies are.
Denise is another person who will share how the Relationship U program has changed her life in terms of teaching her to get deeper into the ownership of her happiness, and knowing that no matter what happens in the world, she’s responsible for her own happiness and needs in life. There are several other people who will share how relationship development has changed their lives, especially during the current pandemic where people are stuck together in their homes with each other. Tune in to find out how you can transform your own household and navigate this quarantine time in the best way possible.
Key Points Discussed:
How Joe and Adriana are navigating being together in the quarantine (01:33)How Paul and Stacey’s programs can make people better versions of themselves (03:34)Working on our happiness and needs before we can work on our relationships (04:28)The true power of relationship development (08:25)The most appropriate time to practically apply the tools and strategies (11:08)Becoming the change that you want to see in your relationships (15:55)Taking a stand for your family so you can create a better legacy (18:53)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Stacey will share part two of her talk on how couples (and parents) can maintain their sanity during these social distancing and self-quarantining times. She will talk about what she sees as two of the most common causes of kerfuffles that are going on right now and how to solve that, and how to deal with the effects of the current pandemic on our lives. She will also dive into how to look at everything that’s going on in a way that's empowering, as opposed to feeling like it’s all just happening to us.
One of the things one must get rid of is unreasonable expectations and control. We must all drop a lot of our levels of control right now because our desire to want things to be a certain way will only lead to misery for us and others around us. One cannot control everybody else but they can set reasonable standards for others to follow when it comes to basic things in life. When something is complicated and out of one’s control, one should just let go of it. A great example of that is homeschooling.
People have certain invisible expectations about what it should be like, but what they don’t realize is that it’s a full-time job, takes a lot of commitment, and is very stressful. Stacey will share her insights on how to really go about that and so much more, so stay tuned to learn how you can navigate this from the same place, increase the peace and harmony in your home, and decrease the kerfuffles.
Key Points Discussed:
Letting go of unreasonable expectations and certain levels of control (01:34)The difference between homeschooling and online schooling (04:01)The stress of trying to replace a teacher and give your kids the same learning experience they get at school (06:34)The temporary nature of more screen time for your kids during these challenging times (10:55)Using time chunks to focus on what’s important (14:21)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Stacey will talk about how couples can maintain their sanity during these social distancing and self-quarantining times where parents have to be at home all day every day with their kids. She recently did training with their RelationshipU students on the same subject and it had immediate phenomenal results for those who applied the tools and strategies they learned in their households. Right now families are having a hard time being quarantined at home, and parents are having to navigate things that they’re not used to navigating. That is making frustrations and kerfuffles arise much more frequently and it’s causing more harm than good.
Parents always have an uphill task of raising their kids while also working and making sure everything runs smoothly, and a lot of the times they take on too many things at the same time because they feel it’s their responsibility to do so. Running a household, for example, is a full-time job all on its own, and it can be quite taxing. Especially if the parent responsible also has to work a regular job to make ends meet. The first step to gaining some sanity is to look at all the things one takes on every day and dropping those that can be done by someone else.
Stacey will talk about living a life in reaction and living a life by design, and how living a life by design is the only way to regain sanity, joy, and happiness in any household during these difficult times. Stay tuned as she shares some tools and strategies for reducing kerfuffles and increasing harmony during the current quarantine (and any other time you and your family find yourselves stuck together) to help you navigate everything as best as possible.
Key Points Discussed:
The importance of being reasonable about what can and cannot be done simultaneously (03:31)The frustrations of not being able to escape the craziness-relief pattern (06:38)The great opportunity the self-quarantine is creating (08:44)How to create sanity and predictability in your days (09:43)Creating a plan of how you're all going to operate together as a team (11:10)How time chunking can help in doing things more effectively and harmoniously (12:10)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Stacey will share a recording that she made to talk about pivoting instead of canceling their Breakthrough in Paradise live event in Jamaica. She will talk about the decision that they made to pivot the event, what they will be doing instead, and how they made that decision in confidence and not fear. The live event was planned for next week, and Paul, Stacey, and 120 of their relationship students were going to Jamaica.
They were all so desperate to get to that event and have an amazing time together on the islands, but it was not to be because with the whole Coronavirus pandemic going on, international travel was not so safe, and they wanted to ensure that their students were safe and protected.
Despite that hiccup, they did not cancel the event and instead decided to pivot it and do it virtually. Stay tuned as she also shares how her and their team are working tirelessly to make the virtual event a reality, and hopefully, this episode will teach you how to make decisions in uncertain times in every aspect of your life. Enjoy!
Key Points Discussed:
Pivoting the five days unbelievable Breakthrough in Paradise live event (01:30)Decisions based on fear are always bad decisions (03:02)From live event to virtual event to keep the ball rolling (06:02)The need for all of us to give and support each other during this time (08:12)Teaching people how to reverse the kerfuffles in their households and increase harmony during this time of increased stress (10:59)Looking at the facts and what’s going on, and making decisions based on that (14:33)Being cautious, careful and smart, and avoiding crowded places (16:45)The foundation of demand relationship that pulls people apart (18:50)Don't do decisions based out of fear unless you want the boomerang (23:20)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a common point of view that most people in a relationship have that negatively affects their relationships without their knowing. And that is the view that they have something figured out more than their partner and so they have to get their partner to subscribe to it too so their relationship can become better.
That’s a common thing that Paul and Stacey hear from their program participants all the time. One particular relationship transformer who was doing the 14-Day Boost Program posted on the relationship transformers Facebook group about how she loved the program module on alignment, especially where they were learning about how to get to the win-win, instead of staying stuck in the win-lose. She felt that it was a great module for her husband to learn from, but she needed advice on how to make him listen to it. That’s a great example of that detrimental point of view and Paul and Stacey will seek to deal with it in this episode.
It’s part of our natural wiring to think that way because it comes from the demand relationship wiring that is just so deep in our blueprint, and we must learn to shift away from it by first realizing that there is no “me and you” in a relationship. Partners in a relationship are one, and if one partner loses in any way, then the other one loses too. Stay tuned as Paul and Stacey lay out all the steps you will need to take to build a win-win relationship with your partner.
Key Points Discussed:
How to get to the win-win instead of staying stuck in the win-lose (01:02)There’s no “You and Me” in a relationship, it can only be “Us” (02:53)It’s always win-win or lose-lose in a relationship (03:46)Extending the end of our skill set so we can learn how to wrap up something in a way that our partner can receive it (04:41)Building a rock solid relationship and focusing on the tools and strategies that can help us take our families to the next level (06:54)Stop telling yourself that you’re not the one in the relationship who needs to do that thing (10:51)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a dynamic where someone in a relationship gets stuck in the false belief that their way is the right way and that their partner’s way is all wrong. The issue between a couple could be just about anything, but with this dynamic, one partner feels that their way of solving the issue or their perspective on the issue is the correct one while their partner’s is not, and so they feel that they must make their partner see their way and agree to it. Paul and Stacey see this dynamic all the time among couples, and it sucks the energy out of people, causes kerfuffles, doesn’t solve anything, and in the end completely breaks down a relationship.
A great example of that dynamic is with Susan, one of Paul and Stacey’s students. Susan and her husband Daniel were at loggerheads with each other over their parenting styles. Daniel preferred a disciplinary approach with their kids while Susan was trying to implement a relationship development parenting kind of approach. This made them go head to head all the time, with each being frustrated with the other because they were both trying to convince each other to go with each other's approach.
This dynamic is very destructive, but it’s not anyone’s fault because it’s deeply wired into our blueprints. Most people have been conditioned to think that they must always convince others to see things from their perspective, and this is what Paul and Stacey will seek to help us break away from before they can give us the relationship development tools we need to move forward in the best way possible. If you’re familiar with that dynamic and you wanna learn how to make it a thing of the past in your relationship or marriage, then listen in to this episode.
Key Points Discussed:
Missing everything by holding on to the “my way” belief (00:59)Breaking the pattern first before learning the relationship development parenting tools (04:42)Being raised in the conformity mindset and how it affects us (05:20)Everybody has a reason for why they believe what they believe (07:14)Understanding that we can’t just have our way because we live within a family setting (13:10)Solving your own trigger so you can start collaborating with your partner (17:02)Would you rather have some fears and emotional worries, or the real collaboration that you're looking for? (19:44)Catch yourself, listen with curiosity, and up-level your skill set (23:55)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a very common complaint that they get from women about how their husbands are too blunt and mean in their conversations, and how that triggers or embarrasses them. Stacey will share the story of one of their relationship transformers who asked them what she should have done when she asked her husband if she could take a certification class for her work, but he responded in a rude way. The lady felt her husband was an ass and treated her like crap, which she didn’t deserve.
The root cause of such an issue is the fact that masculine and feminine perspectives are worlds apart. For the feminine, when a man speaks in very blunt and direct language, a woman feels like the man has made his decision, and she either has to go by it or against it. But in reality, what happens in such a situation is all a misunderstanding of how the masculine is wired. If the woman in that situation gets a similar response from another woman, she wouldn’t find it mean or rude.
The same applies when men talk to other men. When a man asks another man for his opinion on a subject, he gets a very blunt and direct response because it’s in men’s nature not to sugarcoat things, and they understand each other in that regard. They are wired to be logical and assertive when tackling issues. So really, the best way to deal with such situations is to understand how other people are wired, and interact with them in a way that brings out the best in them, instead of assuming everybody's wired like us and interacting blindly, which then triggers the other person. Paul and Stacey will talk about that farther, and tell us where we can start in implementing that solution, so we can start experiencing kerfuffle free interactions with our loved ones.
Key Points Discussed:
The common misunderstanding that takes place of how the masculine is wired, and how the masculine communicates (02:11)The huge difference between masculine to masculine versus masculine to feminine (05:54)The relationship dynamics that are happening to everyone (10:50)Stopping when you're in the win-lose is what makes it a win-lose, not what he says (13:00)The importance of understanding the other side so that whatever you say back comes out in a way that it can be received well (14:31)Being nothing but who we really are in order to be successful in our relationships (18:45)It’s all about getting a relationship education instead of becoming a different person (20:03)Stop applying your meanings to what your partner is saying, it's your meanings that are causing you pain (24:15)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about the invisible expectations that women have of their partners and the harm they cause their relationships. They will start off by sharing a story from a long time ago of how Stacey ruined their Valentine’s Day. Paul had told Stacey that he would take her out to dinner for Valentine’s when he got back from work, and she was so excited about it. She got a nice new outfit and was expecting Paul to send her a large bouquet of flowers to her office. So every time a truck drove down the street, she would think it was her delivery. As time went by, and she hadn’t gotten any deliveries, she started thinking that maybe Paul was planning to bring the flowers himself, but when he finally got there, all he had for her was a single red rose.
Stacey didn’t express any disappointment to his face, but deep down she couldn’t believe that Paul had just given her a single red rose for Valentine’s. She then started thinking to herself that maybe Paul would make up for that by taking her to some really magical place for dinner, but to her shock, Paul took her to a restaurant they were both familiar with, and he had not made any reservations. It was Valentine’s so the place was packed, and thus they didn’t get a table. They went to two more places and still couldn’t get a table, so they just got take out (Chinese food) and went home.
At that point, Stacey was so grumbly and unhappy with the way the night had turned out, and at some point Paul asked her why she was so upset when all he was doing all night was trying to make things nice for her. To him, everything was alright, and he was just doing his best to show Stacey that he loved her, and give her a great Valentine’s experience. This story highlights the root cause of the problems brought about by women’s invisible expectations, and it all boils down to the differences in the feminine and the masculine. Stay tuned as Paul and Stacey dive deeper into that and share the best action steps to take to ensure that the problems caused by invisible expectations will be a thing of the past in your relationship.
Key Points Discussed:
The time when Stacey used to ruin all the holidays (01:13)Masculine energy is usually a single focus so men don’t really plan ahead far enough (07:46)The harm carrying invisible expectations causes relationships (14:03)Ladies should give their men the answers to the test (17:03)He wants nothing more than to light her up (21:22)Taking personal responsibility and committing to not getting triggered (26:22)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will cover part three of busting the myths series, and talk about the “But my partner is …” myths, which are all about how one partner thinks that their partner is keeping them from having their desired relationship because they behave a certain way.
Key Points Discussed:
Depressed spouses and the dangers of labeling (00:52)Everyone changes at different points in life for various reasons (02:53)Whatever comes after the statement “I am” is super powerful (06:31)Showing up differently in your relationship for your partner (09:05)Anxiety is just a pattern (12:03)The masculine dynamic wired into a man’s blueprint (15:19)The widespread misuse of the word abusive (18:27)Physical abuse is not a relationship issue (20:04)Everyone has a unique brilliance (24:49)Additional Resources:
Daily Inspiration for Relationship TransformersYou can find this episode and more at:
RelationshipDevelopment.org/listenSubscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a topic that is literally fundamental to what we think of when we think of relationship struggles. And that is the tendency of taking sides when we re-tell stories or people re-tell stories to us, mostly about terrible situations, either with their partners, or their parents, or somebody at their workplace. And when they tell us, we immediately go right into it with them either to console them or to hopefully give them some advice.
In the process, we end up taking sides because we have the best of intentions with that person. Even in life in general, when we're looking for advice, or we're giving advice, we always get into that pattern of taking sides. That whole pattern is fundamental to relationship situations, and we can literally hear it everywhere we go. You could just be walking through the grocery store, and you will hear people telling stories about how horrible somebody else was to them, or whatever the situation was.
That tendency has insidious and destructive effects, and if we don't awaken to it, it's can destroy things for us as we know them. Paul and Stacey will turn that pattern on its head, show us how destructive it is, and what we can do instead to not only learn to take personal responsibility in all our relationship situations but also strengthen those relationships for the long haul. Take out your pen and paper because you won’t wanna miss the lessons from this. Enjoy!
Key Points Discussed:
The only answer we should give when we’re asked if we have a question (02:02)Learning to ask questions in the form of personal responsibility (03:05)How blaming or bad-mouthing others triggers other people to take sides (05:57)Building up our relationships rather than protecting our triggers for a lifetime (07:02)Navigating situations from relationship development and not demand relationship (08:52)Putting on our relationship transformer goggles, being compassionate, kind, and awake (10:48)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a persistent and repetitive kerfuffle that they used to have often in the car when Paul was driving, and it’s a kerfuffle that a lot of couples can relate to. They’re going to share a clip from their previous three day live immersion event, the Relationship Breakthrough Retreat, where they ended up sharing the story of that kerfuffle in great detail.
It all revolved around how Paul drives, and to give a little context to that, Paul is a very confident driver and can drive pretty fast. He spent more than a decade of his youth as a professional driver and so he’s always keen when he’s driving. But with the fast driving, Stacey, who is not a fan of intensity, used to constantly have issues when they were on the road. She actually used to be terrified, and that would in turn distract Paul.
He used to get pissed off about it because he felt like Stacey didn’t trust him and her reactions would endanger them on the road. That became a trigger for Paul and he didn’t know how to deal with it. Stacey tried to sort it out by shifting her reactions from yelling and making all sorts of sudden movements, to tapping her hand, which meant that she was still terrified. That was until one night when they were driving and Stacey realized there was a huge difference in their eyesight.
Paul could see really far ahead, and that’s what made his driving so good despite going fast. Stacey on the other hand couldn’t see as far, and so to her, Paul always seemed to be driving fast somewhat in darkness which is what made her feel scared. From then on, she started leaning on that skill that Paul had that she didn’t, and that was the breakthrough for both of them that put an end to the kerfuffle. Stay tuned for more on that and how you can apply the lessons from it into profoundly changing your marriage.
Key Points Discussed:
The job Paul had for 14 years and the valuable lessons he learned from it (01:26)The lions coming at you on the road (02:57)The high insurance rates in Philadelphia because of crazy drivers (06:59)Paul’s disdain for her Stacey’s overreaction and her not trusting him (08:34)How redirecting all his focus inside the car caused him to loose focus outside the car (11:03)Seeing far and speeding through the darkness (14:09)Raising your standard for yourself and lowering your expectations of others (17:42)The shift in perspective that changed everything (19:13)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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This week we are replaying one of our most popular episodes!
In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about the invisible force that stops people from living with a relationship development mindset and instead continues to enslave them in a demand relationship mindset. That force blocks people from getting the results that they desire in their relationships and keeps leading them in the wrong direction.
Paul and Stacey will expose it and teach you how to overcome it.
Key Points Discussed:
The Truth: It’s all about blame (01:47)Blaming someone else renders you powerless (02:33)The act of willingly handing all your power to the other person (04:02)Personal responsibility is not a dirty word (06:11)Fault and responsibility do not go together (09:09)Everyone lives in the results of the decisions that they make (12:42)-
Additional Resources:
YouTube Video: Fault Vs Responsibility by Will SmithThe Relationship Breakthrough Retreat 2019-
You can find this episode and more at:
RelationshipDevelopment.org/listen-
Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
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If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will do part two of the two-part series on relationship development parenting. They will share the second clip from behind scenes of their filming for the Relationship Development Parenting Program that they will be releasing this year. In this particular clip, they addressed the issue of misery in parenting. This is a topic that might ruffle some feathers with a lot of people, but it’s a not so open secret that it affects a lot of parents in our society today.
Most, if not all parents, have moments when they struggle with their parenting, and it’s an issue that they don’t like to talk about or admit because they fear that it may make them sound like bad parents, but this issue has to be discussed openly for it to be solved, and Paul and Stacey will do just that. When a parent finds themselves being miserable in their parenting, they usually think it’s because they hate their kids, but the reality is that it all comes from the fact that they hate demand parenting because it never works.
Stay tuned as Paul and Stacey dive deeper into that, and share how you can solve it today so you can stop demand parenting, break its chains on your family's legacy, create a new foundation for your kids based on relationship development parenting, build up your relationship with them instead of watching it deteriorate over time, and prepare them for a future where they will be able to navigate life.
Key Points Discussed:
It’s the demand parenting you hate not the kids (02:18)The detriment of never accepting the invisible assumptions that we operate from as parents (03:56)We must stop beating ourselves up for our actions as parents (07:29)The boomerang effect of being stuck in demand parenting (10:06)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will do part one of a two part series on relationship development parenting. They teach a lot of tools on how people can stop doing demand parenting with their kids, and start doing relationship development parenting so they can create peaceful harmonious households, build up their relationships with their kids over time, and reduce the kerfuffles that they have of parenting. They are actually building a relationship development parenting program which will hopefully be released in 2020. It's going to be a substantial program with lots of tools and strategies, and they've so far been recording and filming content for it.
They will share a couple of pieces from that filming that are so key to helping parents in their relationships with their children. Parents always have the absolute best of intentions, but parenting kerfuffles keep happening because they don’t realize that they’re applying demand parenting by using their leverage as the power players to try to get the results that they want from their kids.
It's a really predictable pattern, and it's only so easy to fall into demand parenting because nothing can ever prepare us for being parents. To help us out on that, Paul and Stacey will break down how to apply relationship development parenting, so that we can learn from that and create shifts in our households that will help us build phenomenal relationships with our children. Listen in and enjoy!
Key Points Discussed:
The difference between demand parenting and relationship development parenting (02:19)The ramifications of demand parenting and how to create a safe place where our kids can grow to become the people they’re supposed to be (06:07)Why demand parenting no longer works (10:30)How parents teach their kids how to lie and manipulate them (14:00)Building up a real relationship with your child with rapport and trust (15:30)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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In this episode, Stacey will dive into step two of their 10-step planning and strategy day framework, and talk about the thing that keeps us from seeing the biggest version of ourselves and the reason why most goal-setting/strategy setting doesn't actually work.
The way most people do their goal setting does not work to create results and it eventually backfires which makes them feel bad, and ends up creating a very vicious cycle. There's actually a strategic reason for that, and Stacey will unravel it so that we can be well aware of it before we do our goal setting. One thing that is core to every goal-setting process is visualization.
That basically entails looking back at the year that has already passed and writing down everything that we are grateful to have achieved. But that process is not as easy as it sounds because people actually do it in a way that does not work, and Stacey will share some strategies around how to do it properly.
She will reference a story by Steve Harvey about the flea in a jar where he talks about how a flea can jump as high as six feet, but if put in a covered mason jar can only jump as high as the point where it hits the jar’s lid. That refers to how we all have limitations instilled in us by the people around us who expect us to live life the way they think we should live it, and achieve what they think we can achieve. Stacey will dive deeper into that and quickly teach us how to actually do our goal setting so that we can get great results.
Key Points Discussed:
The one year later look back and what it’s all about (02:14)Take the lid off your jar and go do what you need to do (04:11)The four things that must be aligned and congruent in order to create and manifest what you want (06:24)“I hope I can” is not having it (08:25)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will share the strategy and planning framework that they use in both their business and personal lives to get results that exceed their expectations every year. They just recently shared the framework with their Relationship U students and they got so much power from it to easily set achievable goals for this new year.
So many people do their annual goal setting, but it never actually works because they use the traditional kind of goal setting which is really counterproductive or counteractive to getting real results. That’s because with that kind of goal setting, one is always working against themselves. For example, you may say that you want to make $50,000 extra in cash by April 1st 2020, but there's a lot of things that will happen that will cause it to backfire, because what you’ll have done by setting that goal, is to focus on the lack of the $50,000 more that you want to have in cash.
And anytime you focus on the lack and believe in it, that’s what you’ll get in the end. It can be very daunting when you think about the year ahead, all the outcomes you want to create, and the achievements you want to have, but with Paul and Stacey’s framework, you’ll be able to avoid flying blind into 2020 and achieve all your goals for the year. Listen in for more on that.
Key Points Discussed:
Either life is going to happen to you as you hope or you're going to do it (02:09)Happening to life instead of having it happening to us (03:23)Our beliefs, thoughts, words, and actions must be congruent for us to succeed in setting goals we can achieve (06:39)The Groundhog’s day process and how powerful it is in strategic planning for a year (09:25)Doing things differently in order to get the results that you really want (12:13)Taking our learning opportunities and baking them into our processes to always get the benefits our experiences (19:25)Creating a different dynamic by having the tools to show up differently in a way that creates peace and harmony (24:08)Additional Resources:
Get the 10-Step Framework now!https://go.relationshipdevelopment.org/optin-2886540735203974The 14-Day Boost Programhttps://14dayboost.com/www.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about the Yellow Brick Road, a tool that they created to help people learn how life works, and what is required to move from one level of life to another. They teach the tool to all their students, and Stacey even taught an expanded version of it to 5,000 entrepreneurs at a Funnel Hacking Live.
In the movie, The Wizard of Oz, there is a yellow brick road that people follow to get to Oz, and that yellow brick road that Paul and Stacey created is somewhat similar in that when we are talking about life, everybody has an Oz. That Oz could be a goal, an outcome, or a purpose, and for every Oz, there is a yellow brick road that one must follow to achieve it or get to it.
The yellow brick road looks more like a video game with different levels, and it has all of the lessons, challenges, and experiences to prepare a person to be the version of themselves that they need to be in order to reach and hold their Oz. Like with every video game, when one fails at one level, they can’t go on to the next one until they’ve repeated the one they’ve failed at and succeeded. And that’s the exact same way that life works. Paul and Stacey will expound more on that in this episode, and if you listen in, you can expect that it will definitely change your life for the better. Enjoy!
Key Points Discussed:
We can’t compare ourselves to others because everyone is on their own unique yellow brick road (01:57)Understanding how life works by understanding the squares on your yellow brick road (02:54)Facing it, owning it, and solving it so you can qualify to move on (04:35)How to become the person that you need to be to go to the next and better level in life (07:16)Nobody else can resolve the issues for us (08:27)Knowing what the yellow brick ahead is like by reaching for the hand of Vlad (12:26)(15:47)Being the observer instead of judging or valuating or getting triggered by appreciating that everybody has their own yellow brick road.Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will answer the question, “What are the strategies for being able to work with your spouse in a way that strengthens your marriage instead of weakening it?” This is something that they get asked a lot because most spouses who work together find it nearly impossible to separate their marriages from their businesses.
Most of those spouses end up failing at one of those things, and usually, it’s the marriage that loses out since it’s easier to do business than to do marriage. Why? Because there are plenty of easily accessible resources everywhere like books and courses about business to help people run their businesses much more easily, but similar resources for marriage are limited.
Spouses working together is always a magnifier for their marriage relationship. If they have things in their marriage relationship that they can't talk about, it's always a hundred times that in their business relationship. That’s the dynamic that people need to understand, and Paul and Stacey will share the four main things that spouses who work together or wish to work together can do to ensure that they achieve the desired win-win in both their marriage and business relationships.
Key Points Discussed:
If there's something wrong in your relationship, it comes into the business, and vice versa (00:52)The ceiling on your business is the ceiling on your relationship (03:38)It’s a relationship deficit of what we don’t see that creates a loop (06:35)Investing in our relationship skills for ourselves pays off for a lifetime (14:39)The importance of the strategic reason for each of you to work in the same business (18:59)Don't try to solve personal problems with a business solution (22:59)You can’t win without systems and processes (27:51)Understanding the invisible assumptions that create problems (31:21)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about triggers and how to go about them. We all have those moments where we get triggered by our partner, and unfortunately, people don’t know what to do in that moment, and it happens to the best of us.
The one thing that’s most important to know is that every single trigger is unique, and therefore requires a unique solution that only we ourselves can come up with and not our partners. There’s so much value in a person learning to solve their triggers instead of reacting to them because every piece of trigger one solves puts back a piece of themselves back into making them whole.
If your partner ever triggers and you need to know how to react better when they trigger you, then this episode is just for you, because Paul and Stacey will be sharing some very valuable action steps that you can take to start accomplishing that.
Key Points Discussed:
What to do when your spouse triggers you (01:31)The beauty of triggers and how to solve them (03:06)Mastering your state in the moment so that you can respond instead of react (04:04)How when we blame we put the power to fix things in someone else’s hands (06:06)Additional Resources:
The 14-Day Boost Programwww.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.comwww.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com-
Ready for the next Relationship Breakthrough Retreat?
Click here to get your ticket now!
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You can find this episode and more at:
MartinoPodcast.com
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Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, Stitcher or anywhere else you listen to your podcasts.
If you haven't already, please rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts!
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