Episoder
-
Almost every world religion offers a pathway to heaven through good works and personal efforts. Some even include a list of sacraments: Holy rituals by which a person can merit salvation. But Christianity is different. According to the Bible, thereâs only one way to know if youâre good enough for God, and it has nothing to do with what you can do.
--
The PursueGOD Truth podcast is the âeasy buttonâ for making disciples â whether youâre looking for resources to lead a family devotional, a small group at church, or a one-on-one mentoring relationship. Join us for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Before we look at what the Bible says, letâs do a quick survey of a few popular world religionsâŠ
Hinduism: Hinduism does not have a singular concept of salvation but rather multiple paths (yogas) that lead to spiritual liberation (moksha) from the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth (samsara). These paths include devotion (bhakti), knowledge (jnana), and selfless action (karma yoga), among others. Salvation is achieved when an individual realizes their true self (atman) as one with the ultimate reality (Brahman). (Liberation depends on YOU.)
Buddhism: Salvation in Buddhism is the cessation of suffering and the cycle of rebirth, achieved through the elimination of desire and ignorance. In Buddhism, the goal is to attain enlightenment (nirvana) by following the Noble Eightfold Path, which includes principles such as right understanding, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration. (Nirvana depends on YOU.)
Islam: In Islam, the plan of salvation involves belief in the oneness of God (Allah) and the prophethood of Muhammad. Muslims believe in living a righteous life according to the teachings of the Quran and the Hadith (sayings of Muhammad). Salvation is achieved through faith, repentance, and good deeds, with the ultimate reward being entry into paradise. Salvation in Islam is not guaranteed solely by faith or deeds but is ultimately dependent on the mercy and judgment of Allah. Muslims strive to live a life that is pleasing to Allah and to follow the teachings of Islam in the hope of attaining salvation in the afterlife. (Paradise depends on YOU.)
(Note: similarity with Mormonism. âSaved by grace after all we can do.â) - Donât include this in sermon!
TRANS: So what does Christianity teach? To find that answer we need to look at one more world religion: Judaism. Jesus was Jewish. Christianity came out of Judaism. Understanding the link between those two religions, and specifically the key difference between them, will give us the insight we need to answer our question today. Letâs start with the words of Jesus from his famous Sermon on the Mount:
PerfectionMatthew 5:17 (NLT) âDonât misunderstand why I have come. I did not come to abolish the law of Moses or the writings of the prophets. No, I came to accomplish their purpose.â
When Jesus talks about âthe law and the prophetsâ heâs referring to Judaism. Hereâs Judaism in a nutshell:
God chose Abraham and made him some promises (Gen 12)God gave the... -
Weâve been on a long journey through the gospel of Mark. We started this in January of 2023. Throughout Markâs gospel, he has been building a case that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God. He opened his gospel with this declaration and has spent the last 16 chapters stacking up the evidence. Today we're looking at this question: What would it take to convince you that Jesus is the Son of God?
--
The PursueGOD Truth podcast is the âeasy buttonâ for making disciples â whether youâre looking for resources to lead a family devotional, a small group at church, or a one-on-one mentoring relationship. Join us for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Weâve seen testimonies:
Mark 1:11 And a voice from heaven said, âYou are my dearly loved Son, and you bring me great joy.âMark 1:24 (NLT) âWhy are you interfering with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you areâthe Holy One of God!âMark 8:29 (NLT) Then he asked them, âBut who do you say I am?â Peter replied, âYou are the Messiah.âWeâve seen teachings:
Mark 2:17 (NLT) âHealthy people donât need a doctorâsick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.âMark 7:15 (NLT) âItâs not what goes into your body that defiles you; you are defiled by what comes from your heart.âMark 10:15 (NLT) âI tell you the truth, anyone who doesnât receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.âWeâve seen his miracles:
Physical miraclescleansing the lepergiving sight to the blindHealing the lameResuscitating LazarusNature miracles:Feeding the multitudes⊠twice! Walking on water Calming the stormEven a spiritual miracle:casting out evil spiritsTRANS: But thereâs one miracle that stands out above them all. Itâs the final and most important piece of evidence to point us to the true identity of Jesus. Today weâre looking at the incredible resurrection of Jesus.
The resurrection is the climax of Markâs gospel. Without the resurrection, there is no good news. Jesusâs death would simply be the most tragic case of injustice in history, with not an ounce of goodness to it. It was the resurrection that changed the minds of his disciples. It was an encounter with the risen Christ that changed them from cowardly, sniveling men who deserted him and were always arguing about who would be the greatest⊠to brave, faith-filled men who unashamedly proclaimed Mark 1:1 â that Jesus is the Son of God.
NOTE: As we dig into Mark 16, weâre going to go through verse 8. If youâre reading in your Bible, youâll likely have a footnote that says the âearliest manuscripts stop at verse 8.â I want to talk about that for just a moment. I want to share with you why this strengthens my confidence in the accuracy, historicity, and authority of Godâs Word. Iâm going to give you some reasons why weâre choosing to stop at verse 8 today and why many Bibles still include verse 9-20.
Earliest manuscripts we have... -
Manglende episoder?
-
Today weâre looking at the famous story of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Itâll give us some insight into our question for the day: How should you pray in your hour of need?
--
The PursueGOD Truth podcast is the âeasy buttonâ for making disciples â whether youâre looking for resources to lead a family devotional, a small group at church, or a one-on-one mentoring relationship. Join us for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Today weâre looking at the famous story of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Heâs moments away from his betrayal and death, and he knows it. His actions â and by contrast his disciplesâ actions â give us some insight into our question for the day:
Q. How should you pray in your hour of need?
Maybe this is exactly what some of you need to hear today. Youâre in an hour of needâŠWith your emotions: fighting anxiety, depressionIn your marriageLooking for a spouseWith your financesPersonal example:
Letâs go to the textâŠ
Mark 14:32-34 (NLT) They went to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and Jesus said, âSit here while I go and pray.â He took Peter, James, and John with him, and he became deeply troubled and distressed. He told them, âMy soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.â
âStay here and keep watch with meâ
Jesus brought the three disciples with him for a reason: âStay here and keep watch with meâ in view of his distress and grief. He didnât want them to pray WITH him (to have a prayer meeting): âSit here while I go pray.â He wanted them to pray FOR him and be available to him (âkeep watch with meâ) while he was going through his anguished conversation with the Father.Jesus just wanted a wing man. Can you relate? Personal story:But hereâs the most interesting part:
âhe became deeply troubled and distressedâ and âMy soul is crushed with grief to the point of deathâ
âThe two verbs translated âdeeply distressed and troubledâ together âdescribe an extremely acute emotion, a compound of bewilderment, fear, uncertainty and anxiety, nowhere else portrayed in such vivid terms as here.â (EBC)Why so much angst? It goes against what weâve come to expect from Jesus: measured, confident, at peace. Personal story: my angst re: panic attack, felt so weak. Jesus experienced this?Hereâs what was happening: the picture of Jesus at Gethsemane shows us the human side of Christ.
âGethsemane reveals the humanity of Jesus with astonishing fidelity. He is shown to be âanything but above temptation. So far from sailing serenely through his trials like some superior being unconcerned with this world, he is almost dead with distress.ââ (Expositorâs Bible Commentary)Remember hypostatic union?The Council of Chalcedon, held in 451 AD, affirmed the doctrine of the hypostatic union, declaring that Jesus Christ is "perfect in Godhead and also perfect in manhood; truly God and truly man, of a reasonable [rational] soul and body." This formulation reconciled the seemingly paradoxical aspects of -
Today weâre joined again by Josh and Katie Walters, authors of the new book New Marriage, Same Couple. In todayâs episode we talk through chapters 11-13 in the book as we wrap up our series and cover the âYâ in the STAY acronym: yield to vision.
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
-
Today weâre joined again by Josh and Katie Walters, authors of the new book New Marriage, Same Couple. In todayâs episode we talk through chapters 8, 9, and 10 in the book as we cover the âAâ in the STAY acronym: allow others to be a part of your story.
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
Today weâre joined again by Josh and Katie Walters, authors of the new book New Marriage, Same Couple. In todayâs episode we talk through chapters 5-7 in the book as we cover the âTâ in the STAY acronym: take quitting off the table.
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
Today we're talking with Josh and Katie Walters about their recently released book, "New Marriage, Same Couple". In this episode, we explore aspects of forgiveness, the power of worship, blame shifting, and more!
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Summary
In this conversation, Josh and Katie Walters share their personal story of overcoming infidelity and rebuilding their marriage. They discuss the importance of starting with oneself and taking responsibility for one's actions and emotions. They emphasize the role of forgiveness in the healing process and the transformative power of worship. The conversation provides practical tips for finding worship music that can help in the journey of rebuilding a marriage. In this conversation, Katie and Josh Walters discuss their journey of rebuilding their marriage after infidelity. They emphasize the importance of choosing a posture of love and humility, feeding their souls with things that honor God, and seeing their situation with different eyes. They also share their experience with confession therapy, where they brought their hidden thoughts, desires, and emotions to the light, leading to intimacy and healing. The conversation concludes with a discussion on the importance of using resources like workbooks and processing with others, as well as the significance of taking quitting off the table in a marriage.
Takeaways
Choose a posture of love and humility in your marriage, focusing on the good in your spouse rather than dwelling on their faults.
Practice confession therapy by bringing your hidden thoughts, desires, and emotions to the light, fostering intimacy and healing in your relationship.
Utilize resources like workbooks and process the content with your spouse or a trusted couple to personalize and deepen your understanding.
Commit to taking quitting off the table in your marriage, vowing to work through challenges and believing that your best days are ahead.
Chapters
00:00 Introduction to the book and the couple's story
03:00 The devastating season and the confession
06:27 The hope for struggling couples
08:09 The four principles of rebuilding a marriage
09:29 Principle 1: Start with me
17:39 The importance of forgiveness
23:18 The role of worship in transformation
34:07 Practical tips for finding worship music
43:04 Choosing a Posture of Love and Humility
45:20 Confession Therapy: Starting with Me
51:43 Using the Workbook and Processing with Others
52:22 Taking Quitting Off the Table
-
Today weâre joined by Josh and Katie Walters, authors of the new book New Marriage, Same Couple. In todayâs episode we get a sneak peek into the book and their amazing story that led to its writing. "For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health." We say those words and mean them. Until we don't. This is a book about creating a different, better, new kind of marriage with the exact same personâno matter how dire the circumstancesâwith vision, commitment, and hope in the Lord.
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
Parents are called to create an environment of love for their kids â even when theyâre teens! But how the heck do you pull it off? In this episode we share 8 helpful tips.
--
The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.
Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
Donate Now
--
Parents are called to create an environment of love for their kids â even when theyâre teens! But how the heck do you pull it off? Here are 8 tips:
1. Communicate openly: Encourage your teenagers to express their thoughts and feelings. Listen actively, without judgment, and create a safe and non-critical space for them to share.
2. Be empathetic: Try to understand their perspective, even if you don't agree with it. Empathizing with their emotions and experiences helps build trust and a strong emotional connection.
3. Respect their autonomy: Adolescents are seeking independence and control over their lives. Give them opportunities to make decisions, and let them learn from their choices, even if it means making mistakes. Related: The Fundamental Law of Parenting
4. Set clear boundaries: While respecting their autonomy, establish clear rules and expectations. Boundaries provide a sense of security and structure, helping teenagers understand limits and consequences. Related: Boundaries (Series)
5. Be a role model: Adolescents often learn by observing their parents or caregivers. Be the kind of person you want your teenagers to become, demonstrating values like kindness, responsibility, and respect.
6. Encourage their interests: Support your teens in pursuing their hobbies and passions. Show interest in their activities and provide resources or opportunities to help them develop their skills and talents.
7. Offer guidance, not lectures: Instead of lecturing or giving constant advice, ask open-ended questions to help them think critically about their choices. Encourage them to problem-solve and make informed decisions.
8. Show unconditional love: Let your teenagers know that you love them even when you disagree with their choices. When discipline is required, do it in love. Related: Discipline with Love
Remember that each teenager is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Flexibility and adaptability in your approach are key. Keep Proverbs 22:6 in mind when it comes to Christian parenting: Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Most importantly, point them to Jesus.
Discussion:
1. What's the most challenging thing about raising teenagers? Give an example.
2. Do you have any "house rules" that you think work well in keeping the peace and ensuring your teenagers stay on track?
3. Teenagers often make choices that make us scratch our...
-
Your teenager doesn't have a normal brain... not yet, at least! And that will affect how you parent them. In today's episode we give four more tips to help parents survive the teenage years.
-
Being a parent of teens is so challenging. It can feel like a constant game of chess. Teenagers have stronger opinions and peers who influence them so it can get complicated quickly. But parents, we have to be brave. Our teens may think theyâre smarter and wiser than we are, but they are still kids. We still have to parent our teens and teach them whatâs right and wrong. They may not like us for it all the time but that canât dissuade us from finishing the job.
One of the most common mistakes parents of teens make is trying to be more of a friend than a disciplinarian. There is a place for a friendship to grow but thatâs not our primary role quite yet. This idea is really rooted more in fear than anything else. Many parents are âafraidâ to lose their teens so they give in to make them happy. Others compensate for their own childhood woes with controlling parents and think the opposite is the answer. Either way, we still have to lead our kids whether they like it or not. Parents that end up surviving the teen years do it from a place of confidence. You know where youâre leading your teen toward so take charge and blaze the path.
There are a few principles that can help you to do just that. Itâs what weâll focus on today and itâs what the PG resources help you to do.
-
John Gottman is a renowned relationship expert who has studied many couples in his love lab. He boasts of his ability to predict with 91% accuracy those who stay married and those that end in divorce by observing how couples communicate and interact with one another.
A coupleâs ability to communicate is obviously foundational to a healthy marriage. Gottman would say there are 4 communication styles that often lead to the end of marriage because of the damage it inflicts on couples.
-
Today's topic is for parents of kids of teens out there who are frustrated. They feel like they're not sure if they're doing a great job. There's a lot of conflict with their teens or even with their kids. We're going to talk today about the failing power tools of parenting. This comes from Paul David Tripp's book called Parenting, 14 Gospel Principles that can radically change your family.
-
Last week we talked about how reconciliation is possible if both spouses are willing to work hard and fight for a healthy marriage. We also said that both spouses have different roles to play.
Today weâre addressing the spouse who has discovered their spouse has cheated. Even though you may feel hopeless right now, there is a way forward. You can have a future where you trust your spouse again. Today we will talk about some key steps you need to take to be open to that hopeful future.
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
If you've had an affair, it's not too late to change course and save your marriage. Incorporate these five steps to help you think clearly about the direction you should go.
Marriage Basics (series)10 Sinful Responses to SinMentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
If you found out that your spouse is having an affair, it may feel like all hope is lost but that doesnât have to be true. Your marriage can be saved, and even strengthened, if youâre both willing to work hard and forgive.
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
We all have that friend who wants to dominate our time or the friend who never initiates plans. Itâs frustrating if you donât have the right expectations and boundaries in place. Today weâre going to describe 4 common dynamics that happen in friendships and how a lack of proper boundaries can lead to hurt and frustration.
Compliant - compliant âWhatever you wantâ
Weâve discussed the compliant personality in other episodes. Two compliant friends likely leads to inauthentic friendship. Hereâs why. Neither person is honest about their true feelings for fear of hurting the other person. So both say âyesâ to plans they donât want to do. Both end up feeling resentful of the other because theyâre doing things they donât want to do.
How do you draw a boundary in this dynamic? Speak up. Be honest when you said yes but meant no. Invite your friend to be honest, too. Make a commitment to not commit to a request for 24 hrs and make sure you really want to do something. If you decide you donât, say no.
Compliant - Controlling (Aggressive) âMy way or the highwayâ
This dynamic is the most obvious. You have the compliant just trying to keep the peace and the aggressive dominating and controlling. Even though the compliant is allowing the dynamic, they internally resent it.
How do you draw a boundary? Compliant likely needs to be the one to say âenoughâ. The aggressive is probably clueless because theyâve grown accustomed to getting their way in every relationship. Be clear about how you feel and why it frustrates and say you wonât give into aggressives every wish moving forward. Itâs a new negotiation for a different kind of friendship. The compliant needs to take responsibility for their resentment and draw the boundary. The aggressive needs to respect the boundary.
Compliant - Controlling (Manipulative) âHelp! I need youâ
The manipulative controller is less obvious than the aggressive but the result is the same-itâs always their way. In this dynamic, the compliant is always rescuing or on call for the manipulative friend. The manipulator doesnât plan ahead so they often find themselves in a bind due to their lack of planning. The compliant grows tired of being used so they create distance.
How do you draw the boundary? Compliant needs to address it. Clearly stating how they feel used by the manipulator and that they arenât going to be the rescuer every time. Express a desire for a give and take relationship where both serve and help the other.
Compliant - non-responsive âI always initiateâ
Compliant feels like they do all the work in the friendship. They reach out to make plans or to check in. The non-responsive never does that. Compliant feels unimportant. Non-responsive may feel overwhelmed by the compliants need for attention.
How do you draw a boundary? Both speak up. Compliant can be honest that they feel undervalued when the other never reaches out or initiates. Non-responsive may need to be honest about their ability to be the kind of friend the other needs. If expectations canât match, stop forcing the friendship and maybe move on.
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
Weâre tackling a subject today that our granddads never really dealt with, our dads most likely didnât deal with it, but it seems to be in our face and in the faces of our children on a daily basis - and that is the issue of gender. Are there two genders? Is gender just a social construct? Can I change my gender if I feel like Iâm not really the gender that I was born as? These are questions that no one was even asking just a few decades ago.
The PursueGOD Men's podcast helps guys apply God's Word to their lives to become full circle followers of Jesus. Join us for a new men's episode every other Thursday.
Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/men.
Learn more about "full circle" Christianity through our 12-week Pursuit series.
Click here to learn more about how to use these resources with men and boys at church.
Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].
We look to God and his Word in all that we do. So what does Godâs Word have to say about gender? 2 Timothy 3:16 All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. - His Word is useful. It corrects us when weâre wrong, and there are a lot of people who are wrong on this issue of gender.
In the beginning, God created them male and female. This was before the fall and God said it was very good. The differences between male and female should be celebrated, not diminished.
Genesis 1:27-28 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, âBe fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.â
Godâs design, his perfect design, was two genders; male and female. This was his original, perfect plan. Both are created in the image of God. Both have immeasurable worth and value. They are of equal worth and dignity, but they are not the same. They complement one another. Eve is described as Adamâs help mate. The differences between male and female are good. They are for our benefit. They should be celebrated, not diminished.
Godâs command to be fruitful and multiply could only be carried out because of the two distinct genders and their roles in procreation.
Genesis 1:31 Then God looked over all he had made, and he saw that it was very good!
When God looked over the creation earlier in the creation story, it was good at the end of each day. It wasnât until God created humankind that it was very good! The differences between male and female are part of what made it very good!
Iâm so thankful women arenât exactly like men. I can guarantee you my kids are thankful. Their mom brings strengths to our family as a result of her femininity that I donât have. And my wife is kind of a tomboy. Thatâs probably a politically incorrect term nowadays. She rides motorcycles. Sheâd rather wear pants than a dress. She likes shooting guns. But she still brings a nurturing, a compassion, and an empathy that I lack. I know some of that is more personality related than gender, but not all of it. Studies show that, on average, women are more nurturing than men. Women are more compassionate than men. They typically have more empathy.
Genesis 6:17-21 Look! I am about to cover the earth with a flood that will destroy every living thing that breathes. Everything on earth will die....
-
Every parent wants their kids to grow up to be healthy, independent adults. That doesnât just magically happen! The work you put in during the parenting years will directly impact the health of your kids.
Mentioned in this episode:
Donate Now
-
Boundary markers show us where one property ends and another begins. Hereâs the paradox: recognizing those markers in marriage will make for a better union, not a more disjointed one. In this lesson we talk about four major areas where healthy couples set up boundary markers.
Marriage doesnât mean you lose your identity or that being one means you have no sense of self. You do! You should! Conflict in marriage often comes when one infringes on the otherâs boundaries and tries to control the spouse. Or when we make our spouse responsible for our feelings or meeting our unspoken desires.
How You FeelYour spouse canât control how you feel. Thatâs on you. You are responsible for your emotions and you have to be brave enough to articulate them to your spouse. (Law of Responsibility)
You can express how your spouseâs actions affect you but your angry outburst or silent punishment is your choice.Steady Eddie vs Roller CoasterYou donât need to run cover for your spouseâs moodiness or angry outbursts. They are responsible for their own actions. And, we need to loving confront our spouse when they are manipulative or toxic.The doormat (compliant) vs. The bulldozer (controller)
What You ExpectThe Law of exposure says you need to voice your desires and needs so your spouse can get on the same page. Your spouse canât read your mind so you have to share your expectations and be ready to compromise.
The vault vs. the over-sharerYou canât punish your spouse for unwritten rules.
The Work You DoYou canât do everything for everyone, so be honest with your spouse about your limitations.
Go-getter vs. Video-gamerThe people pleaser
Your Time TogetherYou donât have to spend all your time together. Itâs okay to ask for some free time.
Itâs good to have personal hobbies apart from your spouse.. Itâs okay to enjoy time apart. Being one doesnât mean you lose all sense of self.Introvert vs. Extrovert
The TakeawayBoundary markers show us where one property ends and another begins. Hereâs the paradox: recognizing those markers in marriage will make for a better union, not a more disjointed one. It takes two people with tender, responsive hearts to make a marriage great.
https://www.pursuegod.org/boundaries-in-marriage/
- Vis mere
