Episoder
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This week’s Noise Hole is comprised of two essential parts: The part that’s all about the shift from the hair metal excess of the late 80s to the dreary melancholy of the early 90s, and the part that’s all about late 90s, early 2000s wrestling. The good news is you get both parts for free, so you don’t have to choose which part is right for you. Both parts are right.
“I Like Sexy Ladies / I Like Shiny Boys” by Poison AssblasterDanny K. and Fart Master on 92.1 The Butt in 1987“I Like Titties (Everyone Likes Titties)” by Poison Assblaster“I Like Fat Ass (Everyone Likes Fat Ass)” by Atomic Pisshole“I Like Car Insurance (Everyone Likes Titties)” by Atomic Pisshole“I Like Chicken McNuggets (Everyone Likes Titties)” by Atomic PissholeDaniel K. and Joey Fart Master move to Seattle in 1992“Sludge Butt (I Just Wanna Die)” by Terminal Suicide“I Just Want A Jersey Mike’s Sub (I Also Want to Die) by Terminal SuicideWCW Wrestling takes over the world in the late 90sNWO tries to recruit young Dave“Blue Monday Nitro” by New (World) OrderWCW Monday Nitro ThemeBritish Farm-Based Soap OperasAmerican Human-Cage and Witch-based Soap Operas“Smells Like DDP (A Legally Distinct Copywritten Work)” by Diamond Dallas PageStevarino thinks DDP can save rock and roll “DDP Is In Bloom” by Diamond Dallas PageChris Jericho, Renaissance ManNext time on Jericho Ball Z!“Jericho Ball Z (End Credits Theme)”“Yellowhammer” by Dave’s project We’ve Got Hostiles -
Dave and Joel are taking it back, WAY BACK to the very beginning of Dave’s songwriting career to explore the evolution of his very first song, “I Like Beans.”
“Time To Get Creative (I Hate You, Kevin)” with Kevin Tonberry and DaveProblematic band membersHow do you sing and play at the same time?“Gimme Fuel, Gimme Full Service Car Care” by James Hetfield“Vinny’s Theme” by Motley Crue“Hetfield In A Gas Station” by The Smiths“Sanitary Bum” by MetallicaLars Ulrich is sponsored by Race Trac hot dogsPokemon Bands featuring Smashmouth and Puddle Of Mudd Dave’s very first song “I Like Beans” “I Like Beans (Yes I Do)” by Blink 182“I Like Beans (Down In Beans)” by Nine Inch Nails“I Like Beans (Bean-age Dirtbag)” by Wheatus“I Like Beans (Synthetic Beans)” by Spineshank“I Like Beans (Around The Beans)” by Daft Punk“I Like Beans (Yes I Do) [Beepy Boopy REMIX]" by Thom York“I Like Beans (Yes Brand New)” by Brand New“I Like Beans (Beans Without the E)” by Taking Back Sunday“I Like Beans (Ohio Is For Beans)” by Hawthorne Heights“I Like Beans (Mr. Beanside)” by The Killers“I Like Beans (A Pooey Bum)” by Pink FloydYoung Davey Gilmour tries to impress his grumpy dad“Hey! (It’s The Noise Bois)” by Pink Floyd -
Manglende episoder?
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Dave and Joel are a bit aimless this week. They’re like ships without rudders; explorers with no map; chefs with no recipe, but that doesn’t seem to stop them from from sailing the seas of rock, climbing the musical mountains and cooking up a delectable dish of dumb songs!
“I Got Them Prison Blues” by Steve “Lil Shanky” Vaistein“Took a Dook in Nuuk” by Leonard Cohen“Gary (You Fuckin’ Sloth-Brained Concubine)” by The Noise HoleVinny Paul’s Bottomless Strip ClubDo Bush’s lyrics hold up? Do Kurt Cobain’s?“Two Kinds Of Tanks” by Kurt Cobain“Nuggets In Bed” by Dave McElCobain“Playing Doom” by Dave McElCobain“Spicy Mustard” by Dave McElCobainBand reunions with replacement members? Yay or Nay?Dave’s boyfriend, Gus Johnson, only knows the current Blink-182Dave remembers Simple Plan, where as Joel does notDave’s dad tries to bond over Weezer“Why do they call him Dimebag Darrell?” Metal riffs in DoomLemmy’s Retro Rundown: Doom!“Doom Is Really Cool” by Motörhead“WASD” by Motörhead“Wolfenstein 3D” by MotörheadLemmy reviews Quakecon 2019“Doom E1M1” by The Noise Hole“Fire And Rain” by The Smashing Pumpkins -
This week Dave and Joel take off their rock and roll pants, and slip on their country chaps… and nothing else. It’s an entire episode dedicated to approximating a vague idea of what two rock boys think country music probably sounds like! Yee-Haw!
“Shopping Basket Full Of Caskets” by Leonard Cohen“Mean Gene (60% Beans)” by Leonard CohenConcerning trends in modern pornographyPorno Life Hacks with Dave“Are The Pumpkins Ripe?” by Chet Countryman“I’m A Big Ol’ Country Boy” by Chet Countryman“Tired Old Fuck Boots” by Hank Williams IIICurtis McGee infests Ireland with country musicAmerican trucker music vs. Irish farm machine music“I Love Marvel’s Juggernaut” by Richie Cavenaugh White children with Pokemon names“Flowers On The Wall” by Brad Paisley“America (Got Fucked)” by Chet Countryman and Trace Shitboots“God Bless America (and God Bless Milfs)” by Chet Countryman, Trace Shitboots and the Haliburton Boner Boys “War Pigs” by Johnny Cash“Paranoid” by Johnny Grass“Hey! (It’s Them Noise Boys)” by The Noise Hole -
This episode deals primarily with two young bois, wee Dave and Lil' Joel, and their personal betrayals by two once-revered and beloved bands: Tool and Metallica.
“I Am A Little Water Boy” by Fish FriendsDelta Blues Email Readin’s How much money do you think Tool has?Comparing and contrasting Jimmy Eat World and ToolHow to write a song from each Tool album“I Got Worms Inside Of My Dick” by Tool“I’ve Been Eating My Own Shit” by Tool“Longview” by Tool“CiCi’s Pizza” by Tool“Sweet Frags” by ToolDave’s adventures at an Irish Cyber-Cafe“Last Night (I Called My Friend An Anus)” by The Strokes“Last Night (I Tried To Play Quake)” by The StrokesHow Tool broke Joel’s heart with 10,000 DaysHow Metallica broke Dave’s heart with St. AngerCharles Dickens’ A St. Anger Carol Davey And The Metallica Factory“Hooker With A Penis” by Jimmy Eat World -
Dear Noise Bois, this episode is a bit more talky than usual, and at times gets a little serious. But, you know what? It’s got heart. It’s also got THREE DIFFERENT Lemmy’s Retro Rundowns! So cram that in your gob and gnaw on it.
“Welcome To The Cannibal Cafe” by Tom Waits and Randy Newman“Killing In The Name Of” by Randy Newman“Bombtrack” by Randy Newman“Hello Dad, I’m In Jail” by Randy NewmanA dissertation on Doowop, Racism, Art and Homophobia by The Noise Bois“To Blues, or Not To Blues” by Billy Shakes“Welcome to The Black Parade” by Randy NewmanBrian May is an angel from Heaven, and also probably GodBrian May’s Rig RundownLemmy’s Retro Rundown: 8-Bit Beeps and BoopsLemmy’s Normal Rundown: Doki Doki Literature ClubLemmy’s PS4 Rundown: Spider-ManWhen your favorite band hates you“America’s A Fuckboi” by Bruce Springstein“Gary Is Smooth-brained Fuckboi” by Bruce Springstein -
Everybody’s favorite morally conscious, rotund bass player is back, and he is very sorry but he has to leave. He just cannot abide the topics of discussion presented in this particular podcast. Believe me, he NEEDS to the money, but it goes against his personal moral code.
“Human Catdog” by The Apocalypse Bois “Bulls On Parade” by Randy NewmanClarence “Clear Conscience” Fatbottom meets President Bill Clinton“The 10 Funky Commandments (God Says)” By Daddy Moses and The Stone Tablets“Take A Little Boy” by Bruce Springstein ft. Clarence Fatbottom“Every Creedence Song” by Creedence Clearwater Revival“Bad Dave Rising” by Creedence Clearwater Revival“Bawitdaba” by Louis Armstrong“What A Wonderful World” by Joey Ramone, Louis Armstrong, Bruce Springstein and Clarence Fatbottom“Good Riddance (It’s The Noise Bois)” by Green Day“Good Riddance (AWW FUCK!!!)” by Green Day“It’s Clarence (Clarence’s Theme)” by Clarence Fatbottom“Hey (It’s The Noise Bois)” by Clarence Clear Conscience Revival “Gonna Shoot My Load” by Led Zeppelin"Shana Rocha's Theme" by The Noise Bois -
Hey hey, Noise Bois! Here’s a special treat for you. This is the original episode of the Here’s An Idea podcast that spawned The Noise Hole, remastered with additional instruments and… well… Gary. Fuckin’ Gary.
This Week:
Dave’s fever dream intro Pajama JamDave’s bouncy, jazzy email reading music bed“My Face Is Inside A Can of Worms” by Nightwish Happy Finnish Christmas songs“Who Else Is In The Band?” by KISS“I Gotta Move To The Moon” by KISS“I Wanna Fuck (And Suck)” by KISS“Ozzy’s Troubles” by Black Sabbath“Lego Train” by Ozzy Osbourne“The Ghibli Boys” by Dancing Turkey Organs“Serve The Pleasure Snake” by a Finnish Death Metal band, probably“Jizzy Suicide” by Blink 182“Tom Gone, He Bad” by Big Boy 182“Mark Ploppus” by Blink 182“Shrek Is Dead” by Marilyn Manson“Ted Cruz (Dead Poos)” by Nine Inch Nails“President Pig Took A Shit” by The Big Ball Rooster Boys“Daniel And The Dentist” by Guns N’ Roses“Paranoid About Brexit” by Black Sabbath“God Save The Queen Bee” by The Sex Pistols‘The Hands Of A Crab” by Nightwish“Crab Hands” by Sigur Rós and Björk “Crab Hands pt. 2” by Regina Spektor “Hey Man, Don’t Jerk Off On That Bee” by Bob Dylan (fr. Morrissey, Regina Spektor, Robert Smith, Glenn Danzig and James Hetfield)“Crab Hands pt. 3” by Metallica“Outro (That Was The Email Hole)” by Dave and Joel -
We hate to start an episode with an apology, but we spend about half this episode discussing musicians and celebrities that also happen to pedos. Can we separate the art from the artist, or the sandwich from the sandwich artist? Let's find out together.
This week:
Radiohead killed the riffJohnny Greenwood in Game Of ThronesThe cartoonish villainy of Axel RoseGuns N’ Roses vs. Aerosmith: The Good People On Both Sides Tour“Cryin’” by The Ramones“I Used To Love Her” by AerosmithManager Stevarino has to balance out the Balls “Big Balls” by AC/DC is a spooky Halloween songMetallica trying to rock the National Anthem“I Just Prefer To Be With My Own Race” by Morrissey Michael Jackson’s music is ruined forever because he was a serial pedophileClarence the funky bass player has reservations about Michael JacksonWhich band would YOU “Yesterday?” Kid Rock pulls a fast one on us allKid Rock’s original name controversy The Ramones sell some coffeeMichael McDonald is a vindictive motherfucker“I Wanna Be Sedated” by Michael McDonaldThe Darkness sell SubwaySubway Jared has his own “darkness” 1-800-CASH-NOW by Green DayHorrifying UK Toys ‘R’ Us ThemeTom Waits’ McDonalds AdGimme a Blink, Gimme a Blink, Blink me off a piece of that 182 -
Join us, Noise Bois, as Dave celebrates his first Father’s Day, while Joel makes it an even dozen, and we delve deeply into rock dads and all their rad daddom.
This week:
“A Man On The 30th Floor” by Death Cab For Cutie“Why Didn’t Daddy Hold My Feet” by Eric Clapton“Tears In Heaven II” by Eric ClaptonHow to become a dad“Sticky Laundry” by Mineral or Texas Is The Reason or maybe The Get Up KidsLemmy’s Retro Rundown: Starfox 64“Tears In Heaven” by MotörheadLemmy’s secret sonRock and Roll DadsBowie is the Grand Galactic DaddyDave Grohl is the ideal rock dad“Punk Dads Are The Best” by Green Day“When Dad Comes Around” by Green Day“Daddy-O, Let It Go” by Jakob Danger Armstrong“Workin’ Dad” by Green Day“Eric Clapton’s Not Home” by Eric Clapton"Cat’s In The Cradle (And Dave Is The Moon)" by Harry Chapin“I Love My One And Only Son” by John Lennon“Hey Jube (Don’t Make It Worse)” by Paul McCartney“Hey Linda” by John Lennon -
Do you hear colors, Noise Boys? Do you SEE sounds?! OH GOD, ARE YOU A MONSTROUS FREAK LIKE DAVE AND JOEL?! FLEE! FLEE TO THE SEWERS TO AVOID PERSECUTION!
This week we've got:
“The World Is In A Minor Key” by The Noise BoysJoel and Dave have Grapheme-Color Synesthesia “Da, I Hear The Garden” by Radiohead“A Higher Brown” by RadioheadOK Computer Demos get Radiohacked “Paranoid MmmAndroid” by Crash Test Dummies“Moo Moo Moo Moo” by Radiohead“Geek Squad Help Desk” by Thom York“Vapes At 7-11” by The DecemberistsThe Blue Fairy changes the lives of service people“I Got The Tire Rotation Blues” by Hank The Tire ManSubway Jimmy ain’t got the bluesWeezer’s covers: Does Rivers delivers?Dave wants to give “Africa” by Toto a swirly Marilyn Manson’s not bad at allKISS isn’t even close to Devil music "The Spooky Jetsons” by Marilyn Manson“Scooby Spooky Doo” by Marilyn Manson“Meet The Flintstones” by Marilyn Manson“Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye” by Marilyn Manson -
We’re not gonna lie. Half of this episode is about Glenn Danzig working odd jobs and the other half is almost entirely dick jokes set to music. It’s not an apology, but it might be a warning. Anyway, if you ever wanted to hear Eminem and his urologist trade verses, this is the episode for you.
This week:
American Psycho Pop PunkWayne Static is dead. All Hail Glenn Static. Glenn Danzig should not be allowed at CVS“Gooch Cream” by Dueling Glenn DanzigsThe ancient rules of having a pet Glenn DanzigA Tour of Castle DanzigGlenn Danzig is a body snatcherLemmy’s Retro Rundown: Majora’s Mask“Legend Of Zelda” by Motorhead Rockstar dick-size chart“Santa’s Comin’ For His Dick” by Sex PistolsRockstar Cabin In The Woods“Would Anyone Like To See The Contents Of My Trousers?” by Morrissey “I’m Sorry If You Saw My Dick (I Need Consent)” by Nine Inch Nails“Dear Dick Doc” by Eminem“Look At My Dick” by Nirvana -
Prepare yourselves, Noise Bois, for an extra long 90 minute episode that contains zero unwarranted, inflammatory and ill-informed opinions about entire complex genre’s of music! It’s time for episode 15, “Jazz Sucks!”
This week:
“Korobeiniki” aka “The Tetris Theme” aka “Death To the West” Jazz is impressive but unnecessaryThe Noise Bois try and fail at jazz“Jazz Sucks” by NOFXPast-Dave bullies a classical guitar boyClassical music destroys lives… in DeGrassi High“I Need 4 Kinds Of Pills” by Alanis Morissette “The Sausage Of The Mountain God” by RUSHRunny Eggs Dio Some of Sum 41Lemmy’s Retro Rundown: Gameboy Edition“Hello Daddy, Don’t Go Away” by WeezerIf Metallica were from Dave and Joel’s home towns… they would be worseDoin’ punch up for bulliesThe Lord needs mood regulating drugsDave’s gone gaga for wah-wahMorrissey and Bob Dylan narrate Dave’s morning“The Ballad of Bob and Dave” by Bob DylanSpruce Bringsteen is Dave’s Boss“Gotta Get Outta This Town (Shana and Jessie’s Song)” by Bruce Springsteen -
Episode 14 is a make or break moment in the life of a Noise Boi. You either abandon ship now, or you’re with us forever. Make your choice.
Here’s the playlist:
“Suicide By Cop” by A Band That Sounds Like Dashboard Confessional“Take His Hair To The Dog Pound” by Queen “Poodley Gargle” by Queen“Under Pressure (to write a song)” by QueenYoung David Bowie fights for the rights of long-hairsMy Chemical Romance and their whole deal“Grandparents Are Weird” by Blink 182“Gettin’ Out While I’m Good (Songs For Lil’ Boys)” by Boxcar Racer“Fat Earth Theory” by Blink 182“The Gummy Bears Theme” by Jimmy Eat World“Dave Is The Moon (Reprise)” by Jimmy Eat World -
It’s lucky episode 13, and the boys are comin’ in hot with:
“I Wanna Fuck My Guitar” by Bob SegerTales of making friends and boosting egos at Guitar Center“Can’t Be On Letterman” by Eddie VedderDave and Joel have some strong opinions about the “Beautiful Boys” in Greta Van FleetThe Beachie Boys do “Surf Rock Sabotage” and “I Wish They All Could Be Intergalactic Girls”Prince’s “(Listen All Y’all) It’s Purple Rain” really steals the showDueling Patrick Stump impressionsA Noise Boi tale of Kerry King at Dave & BustersAn extended exploration of Lemmy Kilmister’s love of retro PC and console games! -
In this episode:
Dave takes Joel to Slayer SchoolSlayer opens and/or goes to a pizza parlorAmon Amarth becomes Amen AmarthThe bois talk waiting through the opening bandJoel catches up with Coheed & CambriaModern prog band names are discussedThe Flaming Lips are A LITTLE pretentiousScott Ian from Anthrax is revealed to be a bird (this is a fact)Dave Mustaine wishes you a happy birthdayDeath Cab For Cutie welcomes to you the fascist state of Portland, Oregon(?)We get ADDITIONAL birthday greetings from Hitler and the Red Hot Chilli PeppersFinally, Billy Corgan is under your bed, harboring a dark secretDave confides his number one pet peeve to Joel, who doesn’t exploit it in any way. -
Despite a mountain of technical problems, Dave and Joel manage to crawl into The Noise Hole and emerge with tasty, face melting jams like:
The Fresh Prince of GorillazScatman Basket CaseMetallica dubbed in 8th grade FrenchTuvix Bands (Bad Religion vs. Van Halen)!Michael Anthony is replaced with fancy boy, Wolfgang Van HalenGuns N’ Roses visits Aerosmith’s favorite restaurantDave wants to guitar-monize like Brian MayRoger Taylor wants to fuck your car!Finally, Dave and Joel get hyped for their all new Patreon at patreon.com/noisehole!$5+ Patrons get a post show to this episode! -
Dave and Joel start this episode out LITERALLY trapped in the ACTUAL Noise Hole. It’s a harrowing experience and they’re lucky to be alive.
Vicious lies are told about Glenn Danzig, which he staunchly refutesThe Misfits weigh in on their former singer’s sullied reputationRowan Atkinson fills in for GlennJoel tells the true story of when he got kissed by a RamoneThe boys uncover the secrets of the Ramone ClonesJohnny Cash returns from the grave to cover more Nine Inch Nails songsMorrissey and Danzig spar via songU2 finally admit publicly what an insufferable prick Bono is. -
Noise Bois, I hope you’re ready for some SELF INDULGENCE because this episode HAS IT. Easily half the episode is about Aerosmith going to Denny’s, then:
Dave and Joel discuss how Slash only has a few axe tricks up his sleeveWhat Lynyrd Skynyrd’s mommas told themWho’s in the room when Metallica records a coverDave’s years long quest for Michael McDonaldRage Against Tennessee WilliamsJust after Joel gets serious about his deep love and admiration for Queens of The Stone Age, the boys try their hand at Parched Stoner Desert RockThe boys offer new James Bond Themes courtesy of Uncle Kracker, JackWhite and Scooby DooFinally Metallica are revealed to be masters of ACTUAL puppets -
In this episode:
Dave and Joel christen the new home of The Noise Hole in the Dave CaveDave has a retirement planGreen Day has a children’s albumA musical tribute to a special Noise BoyDave gets creeped out by his Mum’s use of punctuationWe also meet Jom, Joel, Porge and Ringum: The Bortles (or possibly The Bartles), and they visit Old Mother Titty TreeEngland goes for a spin, as does Bertie The Butt BusThe ACTUAL Beatles sing “You Wife, Yoko, Is A Stupid C*nt"Reel Big Fish and Rancid bring us “You’ve Got A Friend In Ska”A Noise Boi further explains Thrice to JoelDave is ashamed of his Thrice-style scatilogical songAn etherial ambient jam from spaceA story about Joel’s 8th grade Death Metal friendCannibal Corpse’s writing processNashville favorites, Cowboy Corpse - Vis mere
