Episodes
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How do you actually get over a breakup, and why does it feel so impossible? In this episode, I'm chatting with author and mental health advocate Kelsey Darragh to unpack the science of heartbreak, why no-contact is so difficult, and what actually helps you move forward after a breakup (It's not the closure moment you think it is).
From healing after a long-term relationship to knowing when you're ready to date again, this conversation is packed with practical advice for anyone struggling to let go of an ex or rebuild trust in love.
In this episode, we cover:
Why the story you tell yourself about your breakup mattersThe psychology behind no-contact (and how to stick with it)The truth about where closure comes fromHow to know when you're ready to date againHeartbreak vs. mental health: when to seek extra supportWhether you should tell a new partner about mistakes you've made in past relationshipsAt the end, we tackle a dating dilemma about whether you need to disclose past cheating before entering a new relationship.
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Not sure who's worthy of a first date? In this episode, I'm sharing my exact process for deciding who gets a first date, including the one screening step I wish I'd done more of before meeting people in person.
The 3 questions to ask yourself before meeting someoneWhat's actually worth paying attention to on a profile (and what to ignore)Why over-vetting someone like a job interview backfiresHow texting for too long creates a false sense of intimacyWhy a quick phone or video screening call beats weeks of DMsHow vetting works differently when you meet someone offline vs. on the appsAt the end, I tackle a dating dilemma from a woman whose boyfriend of three months lied about his age.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
How to nail a first date from start to finish
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
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Dating Guides: 90 questions, FAQ, text templates & more
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Missing episodes?
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It's finale week, which means we're wrapping up this season of Love Island Lessons with five final dating takeaways from Love Island USA Season 8. In this episode, I'm breaking down why exclusivity has a place in modern dating (and why it's not the same as being in a situationship), how to recognize breadcrumbing before you get emotionally invested, and why waiting for someone to change is one of the biggest traps you can fall into. I also share my thoughts on what the compatibility challenge got wrong and why meeting the family is such a meaningful milestone in a relationship. Plus, we recap the finale couples, the winners, and the biggest dating lessons from the villa.
MENTIONED IN THIS EP
Tips for meeting the parents (and other relationship firsts)
How to tell if you're compatible before you catch feelings
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In this episode, I sit down with Hinge's Love & Connection Expert, licensed marriage and family therapist Moe Ari Brown, to unpack what Hinge's latest LGBTQIA+ D.A.T.E. Report reveals about modern dating. We dive into why so many first dates feel like they're going nowhere, the surprising "question deficit" that's making it harder to build connection, and why clarity is becoming one of the most attractive qualities in dating today.
You'll learn...
Why so many people aren't asking enough questions on dates and how it's impacting attraction.The best first date habits that actually lead to stronger connections.What Hinge's latest dating research reveals about how dating is changing in 2026.Why uncertainty is making people more intentional about what they want in a partner.The difference between saying you're emotionally available and actually showing it.How to communicate your intentions without killing the vibe.Why consistency matters more than grand romantic gestures.The case for embracing a slow burnHow to build attraction through curiosity, clarity, and genuine connection.A listener dating dilemma: What do you do when you have a crush on your non-binary friend and can't tell if the feelings are mutual?Whether you've been frustrated by awkward first dates, mixed signals, or conversations that never seem to go anywhere, this episode will give you practical insights—and a fresh perspective on what actually helps relationships get off the ground.
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
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FREE STUFF
Dating Guides: 90 questions, FAQ, text templates & more
CONNECT WITH ME
Submit a dating dilemma
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Summer dating is the best, IMO. Vacation flings, coordinating dates when everyone's going away, dating app struggles and more - we get into it all in this guide to dating in the summer. At the end, I tackle a dating dilemma about a promising Hinge connection that fizzled out after both people traveled, and how to tell the difference between someone losing interest and your own anxiety talking.
You'll learn...
The conversation you need to have before you/they travelThe biggest dating app mistake to avoid in the summerMy tips for getting to the date quickly even when people's schedules are crazyAdvice for deciding to take a break (or not) this summerHow to navigate a vacation romance without the heartbreak and dramaMENTIONED IN THIS EP
Ep 277 with Camille Virginia about meeting people IRL
Ep 249 with Eric Resnick about revamping your dating app profile
Ep 186 on how (and when) to take a dating break
The waitlist for Date Tracker, my new dating journaling app coming soon!
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE toy or gift card! bbvibes.com/DatingIntentionally
FREE STUFF
Dating Guides: 90 questions, FAQ, text templates & more
CONNECT WITH ME
Submit a dating dilemma
Slide into my DMs on IG
Watch the pod on YouTube
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Movie Night brought the drama and lots of lessons to learn about dating. I’m watching Love Island USA Season 8 to draw real-life dating lessons from it. This week (Episodes 23–29), I’m breaking down why feeling stressed more often than at peace is a major red flag, why even well-meaning friends can give terrible dating advice, and why you should check in with a friend before pursuing someone they're interested in. I also get into a better way to have the exclusivity conversation, what it actually takes to rebuild trust after betrayal, and why "fixing" a relationship is never one person's job. Plus, I share my thoughts on the aftermath of Movie Night and what all the chaos can teach us about healthy relationships.
MENTIONED IN THIS EP
Tips for becoming exclusive in dating
How to define the relationship
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Approachability is a skill you can learn. I'm chatting with Camille Virginia, author of The Offline Dating Method and founder of Master Offline Dating, who went from a socially anxious introvert to one of the leading voices on meeting people in real life. I LOVE her book and this convo was so helpful.
We get into:
Where "high quality" like-minded single people are (and why you keep missing them)The limiting beliefs holding you back more than a lack of single peopleHow to create a meaningful connection before you ever ask someone outReading the signals that someone is open to being approachedSending signals that you're open to being approachedAt the end, we tackle a dating dilemma about how to safely and gracefully exit a date that's gone wrong.
CONNECT WITH CAMILLE
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In this episode, I'm getting into how to gain more certainty in dating by figuring out if you're actually compatible with someone before you're in too deep emotionally. I'm breaking down the three tiers of compatibility (the big stuff, the important stuff, and the emotional stuff), the five things to look for in the first month of getting to know someone, and three ways to actually start building compatibility early on instead of waiting around to "discover" it. I also do a quick gut check for anyone seeing someone right now, plus why chemistry alone can never carry a relationship long-term and how Johnny and I built our own little love languages over time. At the end, I tackle a dating dilemma from a woman whose date ghosted her after they slept together on date two.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Download 90+ dating questions
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Casa Amor has officially arrived, and it exposed exactly why so many dating connections fall apart. I’m watching Love Island USA Season 8 to pull real-life dating lessons from the villa. This week (Week 4, Episodes 16–21), I’m breaking down why scorekeeping is a losing strategy, what having high standards actually looks like, and why asking about someone else's dating life too early can backfire. I also get into the red flag behind "I was just joking," why toxic attachments can feel stronger than healthy connections, and how hope can keep us stuck in relationships that aren't actually right for us. There's a lot to unpack after Casa Amor.
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I'm chatting with Jacob Lucas, a dating coach who went from the boxing world to building a huge online following, helping people date with intention. We're discussing everything from his "love at first sight" story with his wife (and why he didn't act on those intense early feelings) to the difference between your gut instinct and your anxiety, to why some people text constantly but never actually make plans. Jacob also breaks down how to invite physical touch rather than force it, and why the right person never gets scared off by your boundaries. At the end, we tackle four listener dating dilemmas about long-distance dating with a busy partner, shooting your shot a second time, handling a too-touchy first date, and what to do when the conversation never goes below the surface.
CONNECT WITH JACOB
Instagram & TikTok: @jacoblucas101
YouTube: Jacob Lucas Dating Coach
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How much can you really know about someone after three dates? Not enough to know if they're your forever person, but definitely enough to spot signs that they're worth continuing to get to know. In this episode, I'm breaking down 10 green flags to look for on the first few dates that tell you to keep going! We'll talk about the difference between real green flags and behaviors that only look promising, why consistency matters more than chemistry, and how to tell whether someone's actions actually match their words.
You'll learn:
The #1 green flag that creates connection quicklyWhy initiative and follow-through are different (and why you need both)How to tell if someone is rushing the connectionThe role consistency plays in building trustWhat someone's relationship history can reveal about themWhy feeling calm around someone is often a better sign than feeling a sparkGreen flags submitted by listeners from their own dating experiencesBehaviors that seem like green flags—but aren'tPlus, I answer a Dating Dilemma from a listener whose partner struggles with emotional conversations and discuss how couples can navigate different comfort levels around difficult feelings.
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Things are not looking good for the islander's connections, and we can learn a lot about dating just from spotting the early signs things won't work out. I’m watching Love Island USA Season 8 to pull real-life dating lessons from the villa. This week (Week 3, Episodes 10–15), I’m breaking down what happens when you rush physical intimacy too soon, why emotional repair breaks down in early relationships, and how defensiveness can quietly destroy a connection before it ever has a chance. I also get into the importance of multi-dating in early stages, why slow-burn connections built on friendship can actually be stronger than instant chemistry, and how extreme highs and lows are often a huge red flag. So much to unpack here.
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I'm chatting with Amanda McCracken, author of When Longing Becomes Your Lover, about the psychology term taking over dating culture: limerence. We're discussing everything from the difference between a crush and full-blown limerence to how ADHD can fuel the dopamine chase, why distance and uncertainty make feelings burn brighter, and how Amanda finally took her real-life crushes off the pedestal. Amanda also shares how she identified as a late-in-life virgin into her forties, and how she eventually built the secure, "boring," trusting relationship she once avoided. At the end, we tackle a dating dilemma about a casual hookup that turned into real feelings, right before he moved several states away.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Book: When Longing Becomes Your Lover: Breaking from Infatuation, Rejection, and Perfectionism to Find Authentic Love
Amanda's work: www.amandajmccracken.com
Instagram: @AmandaJMcCracken
Podcast: The Longing Lab
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We have five new dating dilemmas! I'm answering listener questions about uneven effort, intense early connections, addiction recovery, confusing endings, and relationships that move way too fast.
I get into...
What it means when you're always the one initiating datesHow to tell the difference between interest and investmentWhy we ignore red flags when we're excited about someoneThe mistake people make after noticing a shift in someone's behaviorWhether it's too risky to date someone in addiction recoveryIf sending a "close the loop" text is actually worth itWhat to do when a new relationship is moving at lightning speedWhy trying to decode someone's feelings often keeps you stuckIf you've ever found yourself wondering, "am I overreacting?" or spending more time analyzing someone's behavior than evaluating whether the relationship is working for you, this episode is for you.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Free dating FAQ guide: datingintentionally.com/gift
Close the loop text templates on IG
THANKS TO OUR PARTNERS
Quince: Get 10% off and 365-day returns at quince.com/talia
CONNECT WITH ME:
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What can we learn about dating from Love Island? Turns out - a lot. I'm watching Love Island USA Season 8 to pull real-life dating takeaways from the villa. This week (episodes 5-9), I'm getting into early dating expectations, knowing your needs, and how important it is to let someone show you who they are. Actions speak louder than words every time. I also talk about how people pleasing can be harmful and why it's GOOD that secure relationships feel boring. So much to unpack here.
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Have you read or heard of the book Attached? I'm chatting with Dr. Amir Levine, psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and author of Secure and co-author of Attached, a book that has indefinitely changed my life. In this episode, we break down exactly how to attract and spot a securely attached person in early dating, and how to build more security in your life (whether you're in a relationship or not). At the end, we tackle a dating dilemma from a listener who flew across the country for a guy who then changed his mind.
You'll learn...
All about Dr. Levine's CARP and SIMI frameworksWhy CARP should be your new non-negotiable dating standardHow to do a "CARP intervention" early without it feeling like a big emotional conversationWhy a secure relationship is supposed to feel boringThe strategy for distancing yourself from someone who isn't meeting your standardsWhy most of us already have secure people in our lives and keep ignoring themHow your attachment style can be totally different with different people (yes, even your pet)MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Secure by Dr. Amir Levine
Dr. Levine's website: amirlevinemd.com
Attachment Quiz
Dr. Levine's Masterclass: The Science Of Connection
THANKS TO OUR PARTNERS
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In this episode, I'm walking you through everything you need to nail a first date, from confirming the time and getting in the right mindset to navigating the conversation, handling the check, and knowing whether to go in for the kiss. This episode originally aired in January 2024/ At the end, I tackle a new dating dilemma about a woman who's dating a guy who didn't acknowledge her birthday.
You'll learn...
Six mindset tips for a first dateMy fave low-pressure first date questionsWhat to do when your date isn't pulling their weightWho pays for the first date?Why you should NEVER plan date two on date oneMENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
90+ questions to ask your date!
My dating "rules" episode
Anti-Ghost text templates
Relationship Needs Masterclass - June 22 & 29
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I’m Talia, host of Dating Intentionally, and I’m kicking off a six-week “Love Island Lessons” series alongside Love Island USA Season 8 (spoilers for episodes 1–4) to pull real-life dating takeaways from the villa. Tune in to hear me break down five key lessons about early dating we learned this week in the villa: why trying to be chosen keeps you stuck, how jumping to conclusions pushes people away and tips for navigating a dating culture where multi-dating is the norm. I'm sharing my biggest gripe about first interactions on the show, which can teach us how to have better first dates.
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I'm chatting with my best friend Rachel Saslaw, founder of Storytell NYC. She talks about how she spent six years actively dating before landing a committed relationship with an amazing match in an unexpected way. We're discussing everything from why she refused to subscribe to the "men suck" mentality to using dating as a training ground for self-discovery to the "flirting with life" energy that shifted everything. At the end, we tackle a dating dilemma about a guy who went quiet right before a planned first date, then resurfaced at the last minute with a long explanation.
YOU'LL LEARN...
Why hating men won't help you date men (same goes for men dating women!)How to set a "minimum viable goal" for dating when your calendar is packedWhy the most aligned version of you is the one who attracts the right personHow to give a new person a blank slate after you've been burnedThe case for grieving your single years and not racing past themWhy low-barrier first dates (the coffee walk) beat the high-stakes dinnerMENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
The book we'll never shut up about, The Artist's WayStoryTell - a live storytelling event in NYCTHANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
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In this episode, I'm breaking down the 3 core mistakes that lead people to commit to the wrong person. It's not a broken picker or a shortage of good people out there. I'm covering why dating for potential keeps you stuck, what happens when you don't know or can't communicate your non-negotiable needs, and why ignoring your gut (which is quieter than anxiety) almost always backfires. I share my own stories from past relationships, what these mistakes actually look like in real time, and what to focus on instead, so you can choose someone you don't have to abandon yourself to keep.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Download my free dating guides (texting, reflections, FAQ)
Relationship Needs Masterclass
How To Leave Your Situationship
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
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