Episodes

  • Welcome, everybody. This is Jane Gardner at Finding your Purpose TV. And today on our show, we have Andy McDowell. Andy is an engineer, so I have something in common with him. We know all about the same challenges of being engineers and being a technician, but he's also creative. So this is surprising because I know many engineers and they're not creative, so I'm going to be looking into that, really and he spent 22 years with the Boeing Company, where he always felt more like a life coach than an engineer and a boss. In 2002, he began his journey into entrepreneurship within a corporation when he was asked to develop an Aerospace design consulting business from scratch, wow, that would be hard, that would serve the global government market. Andy has a bachelor's degree from Georgia Tech in electrical engineering and a Master's degree in computer information systems from Georgia State. Naturally, his aviation work took him around the world and enabled him to work on many high profile projects like the Beijing and Sochi airports for their respective Olympic Games. So we're really excited to talk to Andy about basically his purpose and his journey from getting from where he was to where he is now. So, first of all, I better welcome you. Hi. Hi, Jane. Hi. Great to be with you today. Andy, maybe you could tell us. I'm really excited to find out how an engineer can become into the business that you're in. It sounds like your business actually did help you with Finding Your Other purpose. So my husband, he's never really a true engineer, but right now he has to work in engineering. So it's really exciting to see how you manage the journey. Just maybe I can help him get into his retirement. So Andy, please. How did you manage that? So I always had a love for airplanes, built the plastic models as a kid, was fascinated with the fact that such a heavy piece of metal could stay up in the air from that perspective. So I had the opportunity to coming out of grad school and got into a couple of companies that were aviation based, and the last one being that the United States largest exporter, dollar wise company called Boeing. True joy and passion in my life came to be, to be able to work for a company so involved in the aviation community however, it had little to do with electrical engineering. So everything that I learned how to do with airspace design, simulation, modeling, the work that we did was all on the job training, using my technical computer skills at first to help the smaller entrepreneurial company that I work for become digitized and help reduce their expenses by 75% in their delivery time to customers from about two weeks to a couple of days from that perspective. But it was along the journey, 22 years for the Boeing Company, come to find out about the part of the work that I did as I moved up the leadership chain that I enjoyed the most was the engagement with my team members and helping them to grow as individuals as well as growing their position in their careers giving me the most satisfaction and what got me out of the bed every morning regardless of where I was in the world. Because I was spending close to half of the year outside the office and somewhere in the world helping the government bring GPS technology into their flight and ground operations was what we were basically doing, trying to help them be more efficient in their operations using the GPS technology. Wow. Yeah. That's really important. Yeah. That's very exciting that you work for the Beijing and Olympics and everything like that. It must have been high pressure, but you like working with your team members instead of the high pressure. I'm sure. Yeah. So how did you evolve into another business? Obviously, there were certain changes in your position, but maybe you could tell us that. How did you get into coaching? Well, my goal, a career with the Boeing Company was to work for them for about 30 years, I made it to 22 when I, along with thousands of other employees, were laid off because of the Boeing 737 Max crisis, right, that the company went through. So my goal was shortened by eight years. So I decided, instead of doing what originally playing part time, to fully engage with it full time and follow my true joys and passions, as opposed to getting back into the corporate world or the aviation world, I thought I could make a more lasting impact on people's lives doing that, as opposed to sticking to aviation. Right. Yeah. So you did it part time while you were working in aviation, or you felt that working with your team was really a lot like coaching? In a way, because you have to make sure they're all working and doing what they need to do. So you just sort of started in life coaching? Well, I just took the philosophy and mindset, let me take a step back, I feel like there's a lot about life that overlaps business. And so I developed some methodologies in my head about how to approach the whole conversation with either my teammates that I was leading and directing, or others within the company that sought me out as a mentor. I had some comments made by people about how good I was at doing it, and even had one gentleman say, why are you still here? You're so good at this, why don't you leave the Boeing Company and go do this full time? And I said, Well, I still have some things I want to try and push and accomplish within the company that still haven't been realized yet. So I'd stick around and try and get those accomplished before I go out and do this full time. But a different decision was made for me? Yes. That was the same decision on why we went into our home office, our own business too. We had no plans back in 20 years ago. You're actually a business focus coach. And what's the connection between when you're working with a client, finding their purpose and their business? Because I feel that you're always happiest when you have your purpose business rather than purposeful business rather than just picking what's the hottest new subject sort of thing. So how do you approach that kind of idea with your client? Well, my ultimate goal is for business owners to live a life of joy, happiness and success and your chance of achieving that is at its greatest when you're in a business that you have a love and a passion for, right, and a sense of purpose in it. So that's where I usually like to start the conversation somewhat centered around with, okay, why are you in this business? Oh, good. Do I get an answer that's more like, well, this particular industry seems to be very profitable and growing and so forth and so on where they're sort of looking outside themselves and what the market is doing versus any kind of introspection and thought and mindset behind it to say, No, this is what I really enjoy doing and Yes, I want to make some money and be successful at it but that's secondary to my joy and happiness in life. Right. Oh, wow. Yeah. Because what would be the process? Do you decide at some point, oh, it looks like they're okay when you're working with them, it looks like this is going to be the direction that will work for them and it's purposeful and might make them happy or does it take like two or three sessions? How do you do that? Do you have exercises? Sorry, I mean, I don't do it myself, so I'm always interested to find out how you're able to help them define how happy they are going to be in their business, sort of thing. I generally like to start with them in a workshop that I offer that's based on the Do Have model. So society in Hollywood likes to sell the model of Do Have Be. I go do these things in the world that's going to go make a lot of money, and then I get to have these things in my life between homes and cars and airplanes and villas and so forth and so on and then that enables me to be a certain way in the world. But research has shown that the true path to joy and happiness in the world is to do it in a Be, to have that's good timeline, so to speak, where you discover who you are and the being part how are you going to be in this world? In a workshop, they have to do some homework ahead of time to get some feedback from people that they trust in their life. Right. And so we do that exercise to discover who they are in this world and then, okay, what do you want to do that aligns with your being in this world? And we take those inputs and then we start putting in a methodology I developed that's based off of the business strategy that enables you to develop a life strategy for yourself. And then once we have your life strategy, we can start working on the business. The pieces around your business plan and those things to make sure that the work you're doing is going to make you successful in business. But Be is aligned with who you are in this world so that you can maximize the potential of achieving joy and happiness and success in your life. Wow, that's really exciting. I didn't know that you could actually do that because I always, so that's really interesting, because that's why I do this show, to find out the different ways that people find their purpose and that's really a good sort of driven way and focused way in finding your purpose. Because I mean, a lot of people wander in terms of finding what they're happiest at. It's great for people that likes a lot of structure in their life or need some kind of path or plan to focus on, to get themselves where they are. If you're a fly by night kind of person that seems overly burdensome and we try to tone it down to a certain degree to sort of help you out and give you more guideposts or swim lanes, so to speak, as opposed to a real hard life strategy plan. But at least something that you can do some focusing on to get yourself to where you want to be. Oh, wow, that's great. That's very exciting. Do you run this on is this just as part of your system or is this a workshop that you run every four months of pandemic? You don't do it? Yeah, at the moment I do it sort of on an on demand basis. I like to keep the numbers small so I can give personalized attention as the workshop is a little bit of instruction and then a lot of working by the participants, thinking about things and reading the inputs they got from other people and putting some thought to it. And I can go from person to person and provide some guidance as they're going through their thoughts and so forth. If I got a dozen people in the room, it's difficult to do that. Yeah, for sure, and with a pandemic, we're not doing too much of that now. True. Let's go through your whole process then. Once you put together their business plan and then you follow through with them as they go along in their adventure or is that where you just sort of monitor. Yeah, it just depends on what the client wants. Some people feel like, no, I got it, I just needed something to work off of, and I've got it and they might ring me up once a year or something and have a conversation on a particular issue. Or I have a Mastermind like, group that they can join where we meet once a month for half a day and be a member of that where they're getting monthly feedback from not only myself, but the other participants in the group as they're going along, working on their business plan and their business. Oh, wow. It just depends on how much guidance or how much hand holding, so to speak, do they want? Yeah, Mastermind would be great for anyone, for sure. So let's talk about your creativity and how you feel that developed your business and your purpose, because engineers are not known for being creative, usually. Were you creative before you became an engineer? That's sort of my husband, really, in a way, he's an engineer. He sort of went into engineering because he loved math. I don't know. How did it happen for you? And creativity The beginnings of it started in my personal life and with my hobbies. So, as a teenager, I begged and begged my parents to let me get a camera, and they hopped on a train, I grew up in northern New Jersey and they hopped on a train one day we went into New York City to one of the big camera stores where you can get the best prices. And they bought me a camera and a couple of lenses and so forth, and ultimately became the sports photographer for the high school yearbook and newspaper, as well as the local paper. Developed my own black and white film and prints and so forth, taught myself how to do all that. And that's where my creative journey started. I'm still an avid photographer today. Oh, good. Working on my craft throughout the years and then as a young adult, I got encouraged by my wife at the time to get involved in choir at a church. Next thing I knew, within about six months of starting out, I was up in front of the congregation singing the solo from a major church piece and the name escapes me at the moment from that particular point. So music. I became very active in music from a young adult on. And then five years, six years ago, I went and bought a guitar and started teaching myself how to play guitar, now a rhythm guitarist and singer in the praise band at my church. So I always see creativity as a muscle that we're all born with. I get a little bit wrapped around the axle, so when somebody tells you, they're not a creative person, I'd like to push back and go, no, you just don't practice creativity. It's a journey and it's a muscle that you got to keep exercising. You just need to find something that's creative that you enjoy doing from that perspective. And I found myself going through my career that my strengths were in strategy and with strategy, you've got to have some visionary skills. You got to be creative in nature, the ability to think out of the box, per se, and look at possible different avenues for your business that might bring you some success. And so I think doing all the photography and music pieces on the personal side to keep my creative muscles per se going helped and enabled my career on the strategy side. Oh, wow. Yeah. We could wander off on creativity as well because I'm an artist, but we won't do that because we're talking about business. Business is creative. So I can certainly agree you can put that into your business strategies as well. But one of the topics that you want to talk about was intentional living. And I think that's very exciting because I feel that's also one of the important things to do in your life. And so I'd like you to talk about that as well, please. Yeah. How do you feel that intentional is better than random living? Well, the example I like to use in my coaching when it comes to intentionality is the imagery of you being in a life raft or a rubber boat or something of that nature that doesn't have an engine on it. You might have ,at best, have a couple of paddles in it, and you're sitting out in the ocean somewhere. And if you're not living your life with intentionality, then the ocean is just pushing you around. You're just sort of going with the flow and sort of letting life happen to you and sort of hope for the best kind of attitude, so to speak. Versus, if you're living with intentionality and you're being introspective and thinking about what you want out of your life and how am I going to set a path, so to speak, to achieve that? For myself, it's more like you're in a sailboat or a motor boat with a rudder on it that enables you to get yourself to the port of call that you want for your life. And you may think one port of call is your spot at the moment, but then as you're on your journey in your motorboat or sailboat to that, you might learn some things or have some second thoughts or see other people doing something that changes your mind and so now you want to go to a different port of call. Well, you just take your rudder and adjust your heading and start moving in that direction. So eventually you get to the port of call that you're trying to achieve. But it's very difficult to do that in a river boat with a couple of paddles getting pushed around by the wind and the ocean. Right. Oh, wow. That's the kind of analogy I like to throw on the table when I talk to people about living an intentional life. I'm also interested in that and self awareness, especially that's in one way, why I do Finding Your Purpose, being intentional is so important that it took me a few years. So you're being intentional can take some time and I'm glad you have that analogy of going from one port to the next like you can change your intention. You don't have to always be having the same intention. Yeah. I developed a life plan for myself, I don't know, dozen years ago and I revisit it. I take time between Christmas and New Year's every year and review it and see if I want to make any adjustments or so forth based off of life circumstances or something I learned about myself or about the world or something of that nature that makes me want to tweak certain things within the life plan. So by doing that, I'm slightly changing the port of call. Great analogy. I love that. So I thought maybe we would have a look at your information on the screen so people can take notes and maybe you could talk about what your free consultation may be and what it is sort of like, the schedule for that, or not the schedule, but what do you guys chat about on your free consultation? That kind of thing would be great. Andy. Sure. So my company name is Generate Your Value, and my contact information is at the bottom of the card to include my website, which is the best way to find out about me and get a hold of me is through email. What I offer potential clients is a free consultation at the beginning. If you're in town here in Atlanta, where I'm from, I'll meet up for a cup of coffee, and if not, via zoom call or phone call. But in that first hour spending time with you I like to just get to know who you are and start discovering, peeling onions back, onion layers back ,so to speak, about where you think your joys and happiness is in your life and a little bit about your history. Who you are as a person, what you want different about your life, kinds of things, to try and gather enough information to decide whether I'd be a good fit for you. I'm not going to be a good fit for everybody. Right. And be, what might be a good strategy or path forward in terms of my services to generate value in your life, which is where I named my company. Yeah, right. But I did. Can we have a brief chat about your podcast? I'm sorry, I didn't know about it. Otherwise we'll put it up on the end card. So you have a podcast that you do? I have a podcast. We generally release episodes every Tuesday afternoon. It's called Generate Your Value. It's available on all the major podcast platforms. You can also get to it on my website. I have a co- host, Zach Levy, who's in the financial services business. So I have a business coach with a business owner, we are a couple of weeks away from finishing up season number two. We're going to take a break July and August to get ourselves ready for season three, which will start shortly after Labor Day in September and we talk about all things relative to life, leadership and small business trying to illustrate why we feel there's a huge overlap between life and business. Develop an intentional life like we talked about and be introspective and take some of the tools of life, then you can easily translate them, it takes a little bit of translation, it's not a one to one, but translate it, into being a very effective leader in your business, whether you're a solo entrepreneur or have a team of people that you're leading to do it in a way that you get high levels of engagement from your team and be successful in your business. Yeah, that's so important, Andy, especially for the future now with the challenges that we're going to have to have a successful team and that's great that you guys talk about that on your podcast as well. Of course. Probably ,you probably go into a business, if they're having issues they want to talk about. I assume that's also one of your service, you're not just looking at individuals, I would assume. Maybe I'm assuming wrong. Well, our first season was a lot of conversation about concepts and a lot of it was just Zac and myself, having conversations on particular topics. But in season two, we started bringing in folks for interviews and I really like to talk about and fascinated with people's stories as entrepreneurs. And so I like to try and highlight stories to be inspirational for people to say, it may seem to be scary, but in the end you've got resources out there to, include somebody like myself, that can help you along the journey. What it's really about is your mindset and your grit and tenacity and ability to get after it are key ingredients that will ,a lot of times, not all the time, but a lot of times overcome the challenges you face along the journey. Yeah, I totally agree. Perseverance is one of these really important things for entrepreneurs. Yes, for sure. Well, Andy, I think I'll let you go now because it sounds like you have a very busy, busy life, what with the podcast and everything and obviously you can be a guest if anyone is interested or wants to talk to you. I'll put the end card up at the end, but do you want to just mention that you're traveling podcasting or whatever we call it? What is that? Interview Tour. We'll be here. I put this up for years, but I'm sure you'll be available for anyone to be interviewed at any time. Yeah. If you're an entrepreneur and you feel like you have an entrepreneurial story or journey, you feel like it could be inspirational to others or instructional or some kind of nature, I'd love to hear from you. Just reach out to me at my email address, and we'll see if we can get you on in season three. Our seasons run September through June season, right? Yeah. No, I'm sure you've got season three planned, and I'm sure you'd be welcome to talk to any entrepreneur, I meant yourself. If anyone's interested in interviewing you on their podcast, you're obviously always available. No, I'm always available. If you feel like my entrepreneurial story or what I talked about in my podcast or my expertise can add value to your listening audience, I'd love to have a conversation with you about coming onto your podcast and see if our conversation, I like to call them golden Nuggets, lay some golden nuggets on the table for people to help them out in life, leadership, or in business. Yeah, for sure. Right now, as an artist, I'm thinking I'm going to have to draw a boat going on, but I won't steal that analogy. I will use it, but I won't. If people are interested in my photography, I'm out on Instagram at Airspace Dude. Airspace Dude. I got to write that. It's also my Twitter handle. If you're on Twitter, want to engage with me, please do. Yes. I've looked at all of you, had a lot of connections, so that's great. Yeah. Very exciting. Thank you so much. Thank you so much, Andy, for coming on to the show and we're hoping to get this up really soon, and certainly it will be there for the summer. So hopefully you'll get some more entrepreneurs contacting you once I put up the end card again. And thank you very much, Andy. Thank you very much for the invite, Jane, and for the conversation. Yes, I'm a little jealous, particularly this time of year that you're out in Vancouver and I'm here in Atlanta because I've had the luxury of going to your city a number of times in my business career, and I absolutely love it. It's one of my favorites in the world. Yeah, we're very excited. We're going up on the Alaska cruise this September. so beautiful in September here, so you come on up. I'm trying. Alaska Cruise is on my list. The greatest one is through the Georgia Strait. Awesome. Anyway, yeah. Particularly as a photographer, I'm just dying to get up there. That would be great. I'd like to thank Andy McDowell for being on the show, and if you would like to have a free consultation with Andy about your business, you can go to Generateyourvalue.com or contact by email at andy @ generateyour value.com in order to have a chat about your business. So thank you very much.

  • Hello, everybody. This is Jane Gardner of Finding Your Purpose TV. And today we're talking to Michelle Castelli. Would you like the M Michelle or for official. You can put the M in . That's great. Yeah, we're talking to Michelle Castelli So let's talk to her. She's a wife and mother of three adult children and one adorable Beagle. Don't get me started. I love dogs. Oh, sorry. She is an author, speaker, and relationship coach. She helps men and women grow stronger, healthier relationships in these keys areas of their life journey, dating, marriage, and self and spiritual. Her professional background includes relationship work, counseling individuals, couples and families in both mental health and Ministry. She is a licensed social worker and a certified relationship coach and spiritual director. You'll have to tell me about that, Michelle, because I'm not sure what that is. And she loves helping others grow stronger, healthier relationships because an unhealthy relationship with self or partner affects all of your other relationships. You are so right, Michelle. So Michelle. And we've already got a couple of questions now. So let's say hello to you, Michelle, and thank you for coming by. Thank you. Thank you for inviting me. I appreciate it. And welcome to everyone watching. Yeah, Michelle. So tell me, just because you got me curious, a spiritual director, is that a pastor or what is this? No, I worked in Ministry settings at one point and received my certification in spiritual direction to work with people who were struggling with some spiritual issues. Okay, great. So, Michelle, I'd like to find out how you found yourself here with this business. Actually, it's growing your relationships. Is that in the name of your business? You haven't got that in your bio? Actually, my business is actually my name, but the growing your relationship is the tagline. Yeah, but I like the growing your relationships. So how did you get to where you are now, Michelle? Yes, I spent over 20 years as a therapist working with people, individuals, couples, families. I then went back to school for a theology degree so that I could also do it in Ministry settings. So I've got a long history of working with various kinds of relationship issues. My whole background has been about relationships, what people are getting stuck on in their relationships, what blocks they're experiencing and I'm now doing relationship coaching online. This gives me an opportunity to reach more people and also works with my schedule as well. Oh, wow. So tell me, Michelle, before we start getting any deeper into this, how does doing relationship coaching on the Internet work for you in terms of do you have the couple to come together or on your broadcast? Yeah, I start off with phone calls so people have maximum privacy because some people aren't very comfortable with a Zoom call for something as private as a relationship. So I start up with phone calls first and an opportunity to see if it's a fit, because that's why I do discovery calls opportunity for people to talk and make sure it's a good fit between them and I for moving forward and where they are in their relationships. So that's very important because people start at different places with different issues. Yeah. We'll be talking about the various relationships that you can help with. But what we wanted to first talk about is what do we bring of ourselves to our relationships and maybe how that affects our relationships. That would be great, Michelle. Exactly. I take a very holistic approach to relationships because if you're experiencing stress in one particular relationship, say it's a friendship or it's a marriage, if that's causing you a sense of unbalance or you're not feeling like you're being understood or you're losing that sense of connection in the relationship, or you're experiencing anxiety around the conflicts that are taking place, you then carry those emotional pains into your other relationships. So that may spill over into what you're happening at work or it may happen in your brain. That pain and that stress to your family members and friends. So I start off with a holistic approach that helping one relationship issue that you might be experiencing will help the other relationships as well because you're bringing yourself into each of these relationships. So when you have pain, emotional pain, you're bringing it into the other relationships. So I start there with letting people know it's a holistic approach now knowing what you bring to your relationships. I always start off when I work with people as helping them to identify what they bring of themselves because oftentimes people are in relationships and they are not fully aware of what in fact, they're bringing to the relationship. They might be focusing on what their partners bringing in, their friends bringing in, but not so much awareness of what they bring in. So what I mean by that is I look at a variety of different things with them. We go through looking at what their definition is of a good relationship because that varies from person to person. And you need to find out what is their definition. So that we're working on the same page from the beginning of what they identify as a good relationship. Wow. Yeah. Because there can be different definitions. It's not as general as you think. There's people coming in, and their definition of a good relationship includes X, Y, and Z, and you'll talk to someone else and their definition of a good relationship is totally different and that gives you a good starting point to know where they're coming from, what language they're using around the word relationship. Wow. That is something I never even thought of. What do you think is a good relationship? That is such a loaded question. We are married, obviously, and we've never discussed that idea. We just sort of got married. So that's a great idea to start with what they expect of a marriage, that's for sure. Even actually, I guess you also do work relationships and any kind of relationships. Yeah, because the other areas that I'll look at when I'm meeting with someone is also identifying their authentic self. Because people sometimes come into relationships with various masks. They'll hide parts of themselves that they're not fully sharing with friends or family members or a spouse and so their authenticity is not there. And you really can't have a healthy relationship if you're not authentic to yourself. You're not fully aware of what you believe, what you value, what your motivations are. Digging deep into who you are and your authentic self is the first step that I do when I work with people, because that gets the relationship on a healthy basis by knowing your authentic self and that will bring in a whole bunch of things. Like, for example, we look at values. What are your values in a relationship? What are you bringing to the relationship with your set of values and your beliefs? What do you believe ethically or morally or spiritually? Because you're bringing that whether you're aware of it or not, you're bringing that into your relationships, and that affects your relationships. Also, what motivations do you have for getting into this relationship? Were you entering this particular relationship for love, for networking, for companionship, or maybe something else? So I want to dig deep into when I'm talking again about bringing what you bring of yourself to your relationships, we dig deep. What are you bringing? What's your attitude, your values? What are your motivations for this particular relationship? And then also taking a good look at what is your ability to communicate effectively? Are you at a point in your skills and your abilities where you can give fully of yourself to others when you communicate? Or do you hold back? Do you say what you mean when you communicate? Or are friends and partners confused by what you say because you send mixed messages and you're not as clear as you think, so those are very important. Another is also looking at your ability to handle conflict resolution. Are you somebody who avoids conflicts? Are you someone who likes to directly confront them as soon as they happen? Or is it something else? And again, it's that self awareness, digging deep to learn about your particular relationship style, because the more you're aware of your own style, the better you'll be at being more effective in your relationships. Because you're sharing your true self, you're sharing who you really are and you're aware and you're in touch with who you really are. Wow. Also your ability to nurture a relationship. How well can you express gratitude or make affirmations to the people that you're in a relationship with? How much is your ability to share love? And again, for each person, this is different. When you're in relationships and we experience problems, we often point our finger to the other person, whether it's a friend, a coworker, a spouse, a dating partner. Oh, they're the ones that make me feel this way. I'm angry because they're doing this in the relationship instead of stepping back and saying, well, wait a minute, what have I been bringing to my relationships? What are my relationship patterns of how I interact because that affects their response. So often we're quick to go right to the response of someone else as to why we're feeling the way we are instead of stepping back and saying, well, they have that response because of what we're bringing as well. So it's two way, and it's very important to touch base with that. Wow. Yeah, I totally agree. Unfortunately, I think I have a lot of those patterns that you shouldn't be doing. But we worked on our 40 year marriage, I guess we call it so that we finally know when to step back or when to confront and when to discuss and all that kind of thing. And sometimes we don't. I think it would have been very useful to have someone like you just go through it with us just before you get married or into a relationship because we're all different and it's quite a challenge. It's certainly in marriage. This is actually interesting for dating. Have you had any discussions with people about dating? Dating is a big one. A lot of my work has been around dating issues, people coming in and with commitment issues on both sides. Those wanting commitment and those that come in are not wanting commitment, and they're experiencing problems because their partner wants it and they don't. So it goes on both directions. And again, we dig deep as to what's shaping that for you. What's driving that viewpoint that you have about commitment? Because you have that viewpoint for a reason and digging and looking at that to help people make a decision of how committed they want to be in that particular dating relationship and also finding a mate. A lot of people want to know, especially in this day and age, how can I find someone a mate that I can trust, someone who's genuine and helping them go through looking at what you expect in a relationship and how you can go about putting yourself out there to find the mate that's compatible for you. Oh, wow. Yeah. I can see that would be very important these days. So you're almost a matchmaker, but you're not a matchmaker. You want them to make sure that they're okay before they get involved. Absolutely. And if you're already at the point where you're dating, we can work with it in terms of the relationship of where you're at with right now. Yeah, that's true. Especially like having a two year relationship and they're not willing to commit. I can see that being very important. It's a big difference. Yeah. And my own personal experiences help lead me to this we each have our own personal experiences, but I myself was in a longterm relationship where an engagement ended up being broken and the pain around that. So that helps me on a personal level, too, to understand what people go through when you've gone through it yourself, when you've experienced that and you know what people are dealing with? Oh, for sure. Yeah. It's definitely this is sort of like we come from it from different angles. But this is why I'm doing Finding Your Purpose TV, because people have to be more self aware of who they are and this is so exciting that you do this. Are you just doing this through your knowledge and figuring out people's patterns just by speaking to them? That's just totally amazing. The next part of it, after you get that self awareness and we help you to look at what you're bringing to the relationship is going on to what you want in the relationship partner. What are your expectations of the relationship and what are you expecting now, now that you know more about yourself, what are you expecting of your partner? Because that varies, too, from people. When they get into relationships, they have different expectations of what they want of that person, whether it's a friendship, a spouse or dating partner. They come in with ideas of what they expect in that relationship and how open are you to looking at what your expectations are and how much do you communicate your expectations to those partners that you're with because they may not even have a clue as to what your expectations are because you're not sharing it. So, go through, looking at how well are you communicating that upfront, looking at your boundary issues, such as how often you want to get together with this particular person, whether it's a friend or dating partner, what do you want this relationship to be exclusive or not? What form of commitment are you asking for in this particular relationship so that the expectations are there? And then finally, also, what is your awareness and level of compatibility with this person? Again, this is true for whether it's a friend, a coworker, dating partner, you want to know, do we have shared values or beliefs or interests enough to build a foundation for this relationship to continue because oftentimes people will get into relationships they're not, sometimes, not even sure why they have struck up this particular friendship. And then halfway through, they're questioning or a dating partner and they're questioning, why did I get into this relationship? Was that due to loneliness? Is there real compatibility between us, or am I filling that loneliness gap and we have no compatibility? But I'm just sort of coasting along, getting together with this person to fill that loneliness need because that does occur. Right. And I think I want to go somewhere that I think it seems to be relevant is leaders. It seems to me that in business, you would also be useful in an environment where they're having issues with relationships between the employers and the leader and everything. Would you say that that's a fair comment in terms of relationships? Because underlying each of our relationships, regardless of the setting, whether it's a work setting, a home setting, there's still those basic communications that you need to have. That basic ability to nurture, the basic ability to handle conflicts are across all your relationships. That's the commonality between all of your relationships is that these are some basic skills that we sometimes take for granted, but they're essential to how well our relationships get healthy and people run into problems when these particular areas are not being addressed, when they're not being nurtured and you end up with some big problems. Yeah, there's a lot of big problems these days. I was just wondering about your podcast and what is your angle? Tell us about your podcast and what's your angle. Is it all you do. You interview obviously not your clients because of privacy issues. But right now my podcast started out with me giving tips and tools, and we'll be moving into interviews with others. But we want to lay the foundation in the beginning once I'm now at episode 34 and each of them is about eight to ten minutes long with a relationship focus, tip or tool in a variety of different areas. So, people can go to my website and take a look at all the different areas. We've looked at everything from what you bring to relationships to looking at issues that people have around commitment. There's multiple episodes there, and then we'll be moving into interviews and anyone who wants to share a story on the podcast, I invite them to go to my website and you can leave your name on the contact sheet because I would love to hear your relationship stories or your questions as well. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's a definite possibility. Certainly there's not as many people in business who work together and also live together, like my husband and I. But it's certainly an issue relationship affecting your business. That's one we could talk about with you but you don't want to know some of the stories. But we've been doing it for 22 years and we haven't. Anyway, I don't think we mentioned the name of your podcast. Is it growing? Really? Yeah, it's growing your relationships and then with Michelle M Castelli. Oh, okay. So we've got that and your name. Yeah. You can access the podcast right through my website. If you go to the website that will give you the address at the end of this, you can access all of the episodes are there on the website, as well. Okay. So is it on itunes or? No, it's on Spotify and Apple and a couple of others as well. But that's what I thought. It's on a few. So in case they're searching there. Yes, absolutely. Yeah. Now I'm going to talk to you about your book, because I got information about your book, and it was very interesting what you've done with your book. And I think it would be a good starting place for a lot of people if they're having issues with the relationships. I thought, anyway, do you want to mention the title and everything in your thesis? Yes. This particular book, A Heart for God, is for those that when they're looking at their relationships, want to also go to get more of a spiritual connection. So for those of you that really would like to look at your relationship through the lens of spirituality, the book of Heart for God focuses on that, focuses on our relationship with God, how God can help our relationships. But again, that's for people who are interested in going if they want to go in that direction, in the spiritual direction, that's there as well. But that's part of what I do. Right. But we also look at relationships for people who don't always go that route as well. Yeah. But I believe it's not just individual relationships or you mentioned something. I think you mentioned business or marriage or something and your relationship with God, like you mentioned that it's all related to God. It's all related, right? Yes. It has a spiritual focus on how spirituality affects our relationship with God, can affect our relationships, all kinds of relationships. Yeah. So that's a start for everybody, I think. Or even it might even be deeper, isn't it spiritually? Now, you've got a very intriguing sentence here. Sorry. How to read a relationship to know if it's genuine. That's an interesting idea. Love to hear about it. Yeah. Again, when people come in and I visit with them, a lot of times it's around authenticity. They're wondering whether a partner is being authentic in the relationship. But I always start with first with them themselves, whether they're authentic. And a lot of times people automatically say, well, yes, of course I'm authentic. And then when you dig deeper, you find out that there's lots of parts of themselves that they're holding back, even from friends they've known for a long time or spouses that they've been with for years, they're holding back parts of themselves. And so we dig at that to say, where are you holding back? Why are you holding that back? And how does that affect your relationship? Because you can't come to authenticity until you start looking at what parts of yourself you might be holding back. So that's the first step to authenticity and how to read a relationship around authenticity. Yeah. So you just work with them. Of course, you can't really read the other person, although you probably can because you have enough experience in your history to know what type of person that other person might be. But you don't judge, obviously, because you're right. Yeah. Again, this is all about self awareness, because when we say being able to read a relationship, what we're saying is you can read and understand the connection of another individual because you first are aware of yourself, of what you're bringing to the relationship. That helps you get the ability to read your relationship because you're knowing what yourself and what you're bringing. So that's. Sympathetic with me, but in a different way. So let's have a look at some of your information so that they can find you. Obviously, the podcast we've spoken about growing your relationships with Michelle M. Castelli. What else would you like to talk about? Well, I'd like your audience to know that I am offering as a giveaway to all of you for listening, a gift of a 30 minutes coaching session and there's no cost to that. People are dealing with a lot, especially during the pandemic, and they want to talk about what's happening with them and their relationships and you can go to my website and click on the Learn about Services tab on the website. And that will take you to a booking on the calendar of an appointment where it's totally complimentary. And I give that as a gift to you. So I hope you take advantage of that gift because it's an opportunity for you to have a way to look at your relationships. And your book is available on your website. My book is available on my website. It's like a one stop place in the website. Yes. You can click right on the book. It takes you right to Amazon from the website. Okay. So it's on Amazon if they want to search. Yeah. And of course, your website is again. My website is Https://Michellemcastelli.com. Right. Everything's there, everything's there, which I appreciate. I just like to tell you the last thing I'd like to share is I operate from a model that I developed called the growth model. And each letter stands for something and I'll just run through it. This is awesome. Yeah. The G in growth stands for how we gain awareness of ourself and our relationship, what our relationship goal is. We identify that in the beginning and we talked about helping you develop awareness of yourself and how you relate. The R in the growth is recognizing the blocks that you have that are preventing your goal in your relationship. And we go through and look at what's blocking you from achieving a healthier relationship. The O is openness, your willingness to remove the blocks, getting around the mindset of being open to transformation, the W and Growth is working. The action steps that we developed together to help you get towards your goal. The T is the transformation process and the H is your healthier relationship. So we walk you through this growth model. Yeah. You got a model. That's awesome. Yeah. I didn't know. Sorry. No problem. I'm sharing it now. Yeah. I love models because you need models to get your direction. I just want to say Michelle, to me, what I'm thinking is that your services are really needed in this time, and it would be great if also the internet and everyone knew that you were here to help because we all need that, don't we? And I know it can be very scary and difficult when you're first meeting someone to know whether or not you can trust them, to share your information or to talk about something as personal as a relationship. But I hope that you'll feel comfortable to try the 30 minutes session because your comfort level, your desire for a healthy relationship is most important, and I want you to feel comfortable. But the reason I mentioned that is because we know someone who got a divorce during the pandemic, basically because they were shut down and couldn't do what they do, which is the love of dancing. They did competition, dancing together, and obviously with the lockdown, they realized everything else came up. So I think your service would be very valuable at this time for a lot of people as they get back to work and get going on life because people don't have to struggle dealing with issues alone. It's painful enough to have a relationship issue, but then to have to struggle with it alone without the opportunity to have any kind of help just compounds the pain and the confusion for individuals. We all need an opportunity to talk to someone that knows relationships, that knows how to handle healthy and unhealthy relationships, someone trained, a professional who can help guide you through it and that's why I'm offering the complimentary gift, because it's very much needed, especially during this pandemic. Yeah, that's for sure. Yeah. Well, thank you, Michelle. This has been great. Thank you. Love to meet people who are sympathetic when it comes to making everyone self aware about their passion, their purpose, and obviously their relationships. This has been great, Michelle, and I just wanted to thank you for coming on my show. Thank you, Jane. And thank you to all of you who are listening. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you, Michelle. Any last minute tips? Yeah, I think my last line I'd like to leave with you is if you're feeling down that some relationship you're experiencing is not healthy, I just want you to be reassured that you can have a healthier relationship. You don't have to stay in an unhealthy situation, and we can help you. Oh, awesome. Thank you, Michelle. So thank you, everybody, for listening and yeah, see you later. Thank you. I'd like to thank Michelle M. Castelli for coming on to the show today. And if you want to find out any more information on growing your relationships, Then you can go to our website, https://michellmcastelli.com. So, thank you for listening. And this is Jane Gardner of Finding Your purpose.

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  • Welcome, everybody. This is Jane Gardner, and welcome to Finding Your Purpose TV. I’m Jane Gardner. And welcome. We’re so excited today because we have another Purposeful Entrepreneur today and we’re going to be chatting with her about how she found her purpose. Her name is Dorothy Anne O’Dell, and she was born and raised in Ontario, Canada. So we have a lot in common because we’re both Canadians. We talk a lot about that right now. And she’s turned her love of books into her next career writing them and she loves to help people succeed in life. And when she’s not writing or reading, she’s helping her community. And actually remind me, Dorothy, we have to talk about your charity concept at the end. So I’ll write a note for that because it’s a really exciting one. And she’s also a life coach and speaker. And her life’s purpose is to make sure that people feel that they feel worthy and that they don’t feel unworthy. She believes every life matters and has dedicated herself to helping others overcome their own obstacles and learn to feel empowered to move forward in their life. And, Dorothy, we’re going to be talking a lot.

    Let’s get ready. So, Dorothy, tell me, how did your purpose in life make you become the entrepreneur you are now? Welcome.

    Thank you. Thanks for having me, Jane. It’s been an absolute pleasure getting to know you. I guess my purpose all started at the beginning of The Pandemic, and I’ve always loved helping people growing up and things like that. But I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to do that. And I wrote my first book, The Overcomer, facing challenges with faith and courage because I knew that I had a lot of challenges that I had overcome in my life, like bullying, low self esteem, abusive relationships, and family trauma. And I knew that I wasn’t the only one out there. And I also knew that in those moments when you’re going through those times that it is very challenging and that you feel very alone and sometimes you feel like you don’t matter. So I decided that my purpose was to make sure that people knew that they were heard that they mattered and that they never had to feel alone. So that’s when I came up with my purpose at the beginning of The Pandemic, wrote the book in no time at all and had it out for the world to see January of this year. And it’s been an exciting adventure. And I thought, why stop there? Help people overcome their obstacles, coach them on how to have fun, how to have some what’s the word? I’m looking for time to themselves and just really selfcare. Selfcare was key. It’s something that I never had growing up or I never took the time. Didn’t think about it. We weren’t educated in school, and I had a grandmother that said, you need to take care of your man. And it’s basically selfish to take care of you. And she’s old school and love her to death, but I didn’t know any better. So I was always giving, giving until I hit a wall. And my dad was diagnosed with cancer for the first time two and a half years ago, I met a counselor at the cancer clinic in here at Windsor. And the first question she asked me was, what about yourself? Care? And I said, there is none. I don’t have time for that. I’m planning a wedding. My dad just got cancer. Just that got diagnosed and work was insane at the time. So there was no time for me. And that’s when she said, well, you better make a time because if not, you’re going to crash and you’re going to burn hard and she was right. And I decided to put some tools into place to bring the fun back into my life because growing up there was fun and things like that. But there was also a lot of times where it was like I would call it adult times, I guess, where a lot of the time that was taken up was worried about parents that were sick, things like that. And it was a serious time. I took life way too serious, I guess, is the proper word I should use. And so growing up way too serious and being helping around the house my entire life. And I didn’t really have a lot of friends growing up. It’s funny because I talked about that this morning in a conversation with somebody else. And it was a lonely time. And I thought I hit my forties and I’m like, fun is it? And that’s been my word for the last five years. And for my I think it was my 43rd birthday. My husband says, what do you want? And I said, I just want a family balloon fight. Family is everything to me. And what better way. My birthday is in July. So it’s not like it’s cold months. So I said, that’s what we’re going to do. And everybody was receptive. We had my husband’s family over and we had a barbecue. We had a water balloon fight. And he just had some amazing fun.

  • Welcome, everybody. This is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose and today on Spotlight, we are talking to Adrian Starks of Connect Now Business Network. And today he is going to be talking to us about his business. And Adrian is a keynote speaker, best selling author and chief communications officer of Connect Now Business Network. His mission is to help entrepreneurs, students and organizations and teens who are feeling stuck, uninspired or unfulfilled to become their own Change makers. And he gives them tools, some tips and strategies to get out of the rut they are in and will empower them and these individuals to find opportunities within the challenges, no matter how stressful their environment maybe. Adrian lives by his supportive Changemaker philosophy that began with the desire to help others see that they can courageously make their own changes and become their own champion. Thank you, Adrian, for coming on today. And I would like to ask you before you say hello, because you can say it at the same time, how you got into your business that you're in, how you found your purpose. Oh, well, thank you so much, Jane, and thank you for the wonderful introduction, I was like is she talking about me? That's wonderful. So, yes, let's talk about how I got into my business. Oh, for a long time, even I was a little kid, I got the name Motormouth because I had the ability to speak and to capture everyone's attention. So I did quite well with that later on in the years, as we can see now. I started out speaking as a professional in public in Seattle, Washington, where I used to live, and I started doing some spoken word poetry because I was fascinated with the idea of words and wordplay and how do I inspire audiences. And that just led me into finding more things out about special orators like Abraham Lincoln, Frederick Douglass and Winston Churchill. And I started thinking to myself, wow, I really want to start speaking more in front of people. How do I do that? Well, life caught up with me and I found myself working in a call center for eight years, a medical call center. But here's the interesting thing, Jane. That call center was a calling to the center of my life, which was speaking those eight years that I was there, I wasn't very happy because it wasn't the place I wanted to be. I didn't find myself purposeful there in my own way. But what I learned was the power of communication. And I took those skills and I started going to workshops here in British Columbia on psychology and personal development. I started watching other speakers and I said to myself, I'm going to leave this call center job and I'm going to go out here in the world and I'm going to inspire people through my poetry, through my self development, through my inspiration. And what I did was I created my own purpose and that put me onto the path that I'm on now, where I work strategically with entrepreneurs and business owners and helping them create their own opportunities within their challenges. Wow. Wow. I didn't realize, who knew, that being in a call center is actually good for speaking, that it's just amazing. I mean, I can see how it would. You'd be willing to want to change your life quickly, but did you find calling people and everything really helped you understand people more and your business and at least you learn something from being there? I certainly did, Jane. What it taught me was, the best communicators are the ones who say the fewest words and they listen. So in the center, I learned very fast about I learned very fast about empathy, listening to the other person, getting the information down and then finding a way to provide assistance and to do it in a strategic way that allows me to to be on their side. So there is an interesting thing here, jane. I worked for a children's medical call center, so imagine getting parents calling in about their children. No parent really wants to bring their child to the hospital at all. So I'm getting various amounts of emotions on the phones. I had to learn how to understand people emotionally, mentally, socially. And I did not know during this time of eight years in the call center that I was actually growing into the person that I needed to be in order to get out here in the world and to speak and to help people the way that I'm doing right now. Wow. Wow, that's amazing. I know, I know empathy is very important for being successful and listening for sure. So so how do you use that in your new business? Well, it's not a new business. Maybe you could tell us how long you've been in your Connect Now Business Network, because it's a very exciting idea and concept and I'd be interested in participating. So that would be great if you could tell us how you could help me. Thank you. Simply, absolutely. So the Connect Now business network that I am a part of, I am the CCO and I am the chief communications officer. I actually do speaking within this network. And I help entrepreneurs and business owners with the power of communication. Like, what is your language sound like when you're speaking to your clients? What is your language sound like when you're speaking to yourself? I find that we really push personal development to the side. Now we say, oh yeah, personal development is good, we need that. But how many of us as entrepreneurs and business owners actually take it very seriously? And we work on ourselves 24 seven because we have to because we're connecting to our business network. We believe that you are your business and more importantly, we believe about the person behind the business. So I'd like to talk to the entrepreneurs and show them this is the language you're using if you're trying to connect with someone. Do you believe in what you're saying? Are you saying too much? Are you saying enough? Are you being very strategic about what you need to do in order to get this person some help? So that's what I work with my entrepreneurs and business owners on within the Connect Now Business Network. I help them grow and also help them look at their own challenges within their business. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. You were mentioning that you'd like to speak about change and I can see how your business is all about change, making people more successful in their business and communicating better in their business. And I was wondering how you felt about the art of speaking as well, because I think I think it's very difficult for a lot of people to be able to speak, as you can see from me. And it's always a challenge for for some of us too. And I'd love to hear what your experience has taught you about speaking. Well, thank you, Jane. There's two things that people are afraid of, death and public speaking. So it doesn't surprise me when I hear about people that they have a little bit of a challenge with public speaking. Now the art of speaking of what you just mentioned. I love that phrase, the art of speaking. And when I want to talk about the word art, it's an acronym for me. I call it Applying Real Truth. And I'll say it again, applying real truth to what you're speaking. So in the art of speaking, it's very important for us because everyone at the end of the day is a public speaker. You speak in public all the time. But if you're going to do this professionally or if you want to speak on behalf of your business, you have to be crystal clear about what is your message, because people want to know a few things. Who are you? Why are you here and how can you help me? And if you don't know who you are, if you don't know why you're there, if you don't know how you can help them, your message is going to be very skewed. So, in the art of speaking you must be clear about what do you want to do, what is the point of the conversation, of the speech. And Jane, I talk about this a lot with people who want to get more into speaking and also my entrepreneurs and business owners who want to be more effective speakers because, here's the thing, it's not about charisma, there are a lot of great speakers and dynamic speakers out there but what makes them effective is how they deliver their message. What is the point of that message? Are you connecting with your audience, the people in front of you? If you and I are having a conversation? Am I connecting with you on a certain level? Am I talking to you in a way that you understand. I'm talking about a bunch of jargon to you about facts, information and data. At some point you're going to, you're going to be like, what is he talking about? So as a speaker, usually the least amount of words is the best. As a speaker, you have to be clear about what you are wanting your audience to do. What is the game plan? What's the action step behind this whole talk. If you're walking in a boardroom, do you know what the game plan is when you walk into that boardroom? You're walking into a classroom to your students. Do you know what the game plan is you're walking into or meet up with a client? Do you know what the game plan is, what the action step is you want that person to do? So if you know that, then the art of speaking becomes quite fun. It's like riding a bicycle. You learn about a handful of things and then after that you start learning how to have fun with it. I was wondering that that sounds great. I never thought of applying real truth when you're speaking. It would help. So that's a very interesting concept and I hope that you'll hopefully have a book on that soon, if not already. Yeah, because that is certainly a different from what, not different but I've heard that story is also good for when you're speaking because people connect to your stories. And I'm just wondering, obviously, you must use stories in your speaking as well. I would think, assuming I do stories all the time. And I wanted to talk about the power of story. You mentioned this. Two stories basically are the bridge that we connect to the person that's listening to us, because you can talk about yourself all day. You can talk about what you have, what your expertise is. But if there's not a story, some common ground that a person can on their own terms connect with you, then you're going to not resonate with that person. This is why stories are so powerful, not just in speakers, but in movies. We know that there's always a story in the movie, the underlying story, because it brings us together and more importantly, the brain, this powerful organ in our head that is designed to do two things to protect us and to serve us. It's designed to see pictures. That's how we relate our world, we see images, we understand we through sight, through smell, through sound, we have images, memories. So when a story is told, that person is actually virtualizing in their head, certain things. This is why as a speaker, when you're telling a story, it's important to put in some senses of the story. Where was it? What was it? What did it feel like? What did it smell like? What did it look like? Because when you're doing this, you're literally painting the picture for the person to review on their own. Now, when you tell the story a good way, not just ranting through a story, but you're actually in the present moment of the story that audience member, that client, whomever is in front of you, they will walk to that bridge of the story and meet you halfway. The next thing that you have to do when you tell that story to walk them over that bridge of the conversation is what is the point? And so, really, people get caught up in the story. They forget to say, what is the point of all this? So you got to make sure you have that point after the story. Yes, I was going to say that you did have already mentioned that we have to have a goal or well, know what our action step is before we start speaking. So that's great. So we we've got we can add some stories in there, but we better make sure we actually tell people what what we'd like to do. And I was wondering, you also talk about change and we haven't really talked about being a change maker in our times right now, of course, are changing quite rapidly. And it's it's just amazing what you're doing right now that you managed to adapt to the pandemic with your business and you seem to have been very successful with it. And how do you get others to understand that they can also change their story as well as our story? Jane, you are speaking my language now. Yeah. So let's talk a little bit about. So here's the thing. There's one thing about change. Change is inevitable is always going to happen so that people that are watching and listening this right now, you cannot escape change. What I teach people is that you must be a courageous creator of change. Now, what I mean by this is that you have to be a person that you are willing to create your own changes within the changes. This is why I talk about the word challenge. Look at the word change. Inside of that word challenge is the word change. The reason why we have so many challenges with change is because a lot of the changes in our life, we don't see them coming and we're not prepared to deal with them in this global pandemic. There have been many people who have had who have had problems swirling all around them, but they have been unable to really adapt to the changes because they're focusing so much on what they can't change versus what they can. The greatest thing, the greatest fear is not change. The greatest fear is remaining unchanged. And when we remain unchanged, we can't grow, Jane . And I talk about growing forward when we are able to change and adapt to change, we can actually grow forward in our lives. It's important for us to understand this now that when you have a challenge, think about that word again. Challenge inside the word is change. What can you change within that challenge? There's something to be learned. There's something to adapt to, and there's something that you can gather and enhance as your own personal strength, because I believe every obstacle we can take in and we can use to our advantage. I love teaching people about change because you can want all the success you want in the world. You can want to travel. You can want to have a different , a better relationship, better health. You can have a better career. But none of that will matter if you don't change yourself. When I was in a call center for eight years, we just talked about this previously, Jane. What got me out of that call center was my willingness to change myself and expand beyond my environment. I could have been like a lot of people and just stayed there and complained about what wasn't being done right, why this environment didn't work for me, and that I don't like my job, et cetera. But I decided that if I want to change, I have to expand, I have to become better. So I started looking at possibilities. I started looking at opportunities. And I started creating my own opportunities. In this global pandemic and even in twenty, twenty one and I always say this twenty, twenty one is just four numbers when that clock strikes 12:00 a.m. You're well, I'm sorry, that's the clock strikes 12:00, you are not going to automatically just have change in your life. It's not going to happen that way. We have to understand that we change what we do during our moments here on this planet. And that's that's really what matters to us, is to be an effective change maker. And I do teach this in my workshops about how do you go about being an effective change maker, because it's more than just saying, oh, yeah, I need to change. How many times have you heard people say that or you have said that? I have said that in my previous life. I need to change change that but it never happens because change is not just a word. It's an action, an action. You know, I'm I never even thought of change being in challenge change being in the word challenge. And I'm going to steal that. And I'm not going to steal I'm going to make a meme and credit you for that. You're going to be one of my quotes everywhere, because that's that's a wonderful, wonderful analogy, because I'm sixty three and I'm, you know, I'm busy working on another company and here I am still trying to get a business on the Internet. And I love change and I love, love change. But how do you get someone who doesn't really like change? Can you actually change them with your workshop or is it is a certain personality, that kind of thing? I'm sure you're awesome and will be able to change anyone so that they actually take action on their own on changing what they have to change. Obviously, great question, great question. This is what I truly believe, we can never make someone change. However, I can provide you with the tools and strategies that can inspire you to want to change, but you've got to want too though. You can come into a workshop. You can go see a speaker. You can go anywhere and you can that person can just sprinkle you with all kinds of words of motivation, inspiration and data and facts. But if you don't have a personal motive, that which is true motivation, it's having a motive. You have to have a motive of a reason to allow someone to help you to change. So if you're coming to a workshop or coming to my event or seminar that I speak at, if you're ready and you're open to learn something new, you're going to change automatically because you are open to that. But if you're resistant to it, it's just going to be words thrown away in the wind. So we have to realize that when you want to change or you want anything to be different, you have to be open for the possibilities. And I work with multiple people when it comes to entrepreneurs, business owners. I work with students and schools. Everyone's the same. At the end of the day, when it comes to their life, everyone wants to be loved, everyone wants to feel appreciated, and everyone wants to feel like they have a meaning or purpose to life. Which is why I love this show that you've invited me on, Jane. And so when we can realize that we want these three things, but to to get those three things, you have to step into your challenges. You got to step outside of your comfort zone. That way you can see all the different things around you. We learned through personal experience that personal experience cannot happen if you're unwilling to change what you're currently doing, if you do the same thing every single day and be a creature of habit. That's fine. But you can not expect your life to be any better if you're not doing anything different. Some awesome I totally agree. That's great, I'm glad that I'm sure that's the first thing that you tell people in your workshop because, yeah, if if you're not willing to change then you'll never change. But yeah. So I wanted to speak about your podcast because I love the idea of the purpose of purposeful life. And you've just started it in twenty nineteen you were saying. So I'd love to hear how that ties into to your business and how you feel it incorporates itself into your business doing it. Thank you, yes, so the podcast is The purposeful Life show podcast. It's actually on the Connect Now podcast dot com ConnectNowpodcast.com. And this show was designed to help people from all walks of life. Now I do focus heavily on entrepreneurs and business owners because that's my passion, because I'm one. But I do have it open for people who are looking to transition maybe out of a job. I call the exit strategy. You're wanting to change something. You're wanting to go up in the upper echelons of command of your certain business. If you're just wanting to change relationships or you're wanting to change your health or anything this podcast designed to give you some tools and strategies for some breakthroughs for change in your life. And I talk about elements of self development, mindset, emotional balance. I talk about health. I talk about here's the thing. If you want a successful business, you have to know what success is. Success is not a result. Success is a process. So in this podcast, I talk about the elements of that. I bring on people who are actually very successful in what they do. I talk about what are their challenges because I want people to know that we're all human at the end of the day and it's OK to be vulnerable. That's where your strength is. You see, we live in a time now where it's information based. People are tired of the cookie cutter approach of I have it all together, I have no challenges. I'm quite successful. And so can you be. People are tired of hearing that, and they know that behind closed doors, people are still human. And I want people to see that although this person does have a challenge. I mean, have a success in their life, they still have challenges. So how do they get to where they are now? What's currently challenging them? How do they deal with challenge? I want to know what other people do in the midst of their challenges and their life and the idea, The Purposeful Life show. I chose that title because I want people to be purposeful toward their life. You see, you have to live on purpose when you get out of bed in the morning and you want to run your business a certain way. Do you have the intention of doing that or are you waking up saying, oh, I hope that today is better than yesterday and I get some people that may want to sign with me or some people that want to join my network or whomever. No, you have to get out of that bed and saying, I'm going out here to deliver some powerful things to the people in my community, into my marketplace, and I'm bringing value to the marketplace. That's the thing. The marketplace out here. Where you're working, where you want to be, they're not paying you because you're just this friendly, bubbly person, they're paying you for the value that you're bringing to it. What are you providing them with? So this podcast's of Purposeful Life show, I want people to see that people come from all walks of life and they provide value. And the key is what value can you bring to the planet? Oh, wow. Wow. Yeah, I certainly agree that you meaning just showing other entrepreneurs who are successful, who have challenges very similar to yours or mine or anyone else is really, really helps. And I'm grateful that you do that because, yeah, it's really important to do that. So I was wondering, maybe you could speak about your book Finding your Inner Champion? I think Champion, being a champion in your own life is really important. And maybe I'll just put up the little offer here just while you speak on it, just so people can write it down while you're speaking and find it. That would be great. OK, great. Thank you. So before you talk about this book, let me elaborate on the word. I know there is a lot of confusion for some people because immediately we have we have gone to the state of, well, isn't champion an athlete? Is that a winning contestant? Is that a person who is competing? Yes, that's some of it. But in actuality, a champion is is an advocate, a warrior or a defender of a cause. And you will hear it sometimes people say, well, they're a champion for this. They're champion for that. How often do you call yourself a champion, because we associate it with something that we feel is not a part of us and it actually is the champion inside of you is that person who is willing to fight for you. You see, I feel like we have to go in, we got to beard the lion at times. If for those of you who don't know what I mean by that, you've got to go in on the opponent's territory and challenge them. You've got to go inside yourself and challenge yourself to bring out that better part of you. That's what I call finding the inner champion. You got to go in and sit yourself down. And as Howard Thurman would say, he was a great mentor to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., you've got to sit yourself down, accept your facts, and have a personal civil war between a person that you no longer want to be and the person you want to be. And that is hard to do. That's why I call it finding your inner champion, because you've got to go inside yourself. You've got to get through some rubble. You got to get through some mess because you're going to have aspects of you that you have built over time because you think that's who you are. No, that's conditioning. See, that who we really are is a person that cannot be defeated. The great Socrates, great Greek philosopher. I have him tattooed on my forearm. I love him. He said that the secret to change is to not focus your energy on fighting the old, but focus your energy on building the new, building the new means, you go in and you start finding things, aspects of yourself, things that you like, things that happen. And you start looking at these things and saying, what can I do? What can I elaborate more on? And you've got to start calling yourself out a little bit, too. So in this book, Finding Your Inner Champion, I talk about my personal experience that really rocked my world, that made me think differently about how I saw myself. Now, this is not just a, this is not a motivational story of a rah rah, I've been through this and you can do it. No, I dig deep into the aspect of what happened, why it happened. My vulnerability. What three steps did I have to do in order to get myself out of what I call the tunnel of fear? In this book, I talk about how to build up your inner champion, what that looks like, how you can use it in your business, in your personal life, it is critical that you begin to champion for yourself. We live in a time now where we're so focused on distractions around us, we're so focused on what's not happening, that we forget that all our life matters. All that matters to us is home base. What we're creating right now with our thoughts, with our feelings and with our actions. And when you find your inner champion, you will do like I did. You will leave whatever place that you're in right now that you feel that you're stuck and you will start expanding beyond that environment because you'll start creating opportunities within the challenges, because you know something a little bit different about yourself and you're using that inner champion to guide you to where you need to go. And I call it the GPS going positively somewhere. Oh, wow. I didn't realize that was how much value is in the book. I bought a copy, so I'll have to read it for sure, because that sounds like the perfect book for students and for people who are interested in and taking the leap into entrepreneurship and and for everybody, really, isn't it, just to find out who you are and what your purpose is in life and what makes you happy that that's so exciting. And I'm just blown away. I'm going to have to read that right away. So, Adrian, before we go, I'll put up the offer later. No worries for everybody to write down. But before before we go, I just want to say how awesome, awesome this has been and is there anything you want to leave us with for more wisdom before we go? That would be, I mean, you're just been blowing me away, so I'll just have to give it back to you for a few minutes and just sum up what you like to tell us. Please. Thank you so much. And I want to thank you for allowing me to be on the show. This is what I want to leave with you guys today. You're human. And you're here on this planet to do some very powerful things, but it's up to you. Part of your personal secret birthright is to leave this planet better than when you showed up. It's not about labels. It's not about what you have, it's about what you do, what you create, we are co-collaborators of creation with nature. And you have the ability right now to change your life, you have the ability right now to take steps further into enhancing yourself and enhancing your your health, your personal relationships, your career, it is up to you. Be your own changemaker. And to do that, you've got to do three things. Three things to effectively change. One is accepting change. The second is addressing change and the third is embracing change. I talk about this in one of my talks that I did last year called Growing Forward, you can go on championup.net to see that talk. Twenty twenty one is around the corner. As I mentioned before it is just four numbers. Don't get so set on the fact that while it's a new year, it's got to be better for me, get set on the fact that this is another year that I have to be on this planet and I'm going to make some good out of it because here's the thing about life. Life is risky. It's so risky, you can't get out of it alive. So if you don't learn how to effectively deal with changes, your life is going to be more of a misery than it is going to be more of a learning lesson experience, a journey. I also love talking about success because I truly believe we radiate success, don't get success and achievement mixed up. A lot of people do this. They think, well, if I've got this, I must be successful. No, it means you achieved this great job. Now what next? As human beings, we are goal driven. This is why right now, during the holidays, kids are more excited in the anticipation up to Christmas or the holidays. And you notice after the holidays or that day after they play with their toys, they open everything they're back to themselves again. And as parents, we're like, why? I just gave you everything because goal driven, they were excited. You been excited going to dinner, going out to dinner somewhere or going on a trip. Hopefully we can do this in twenty, twenty one. But then are you so excited coming back. No, because you've accomplished the goal. So as humans, we are goal driven. We are happiest when we're in pursuit of something. So let your success be about the journey of something. What is that journey for you? Along that journey, you're going to have some great challenges and I go back to what I s

  • Hello, this is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose, and today we're on a mission to create awareness that being self-aware of your personality and your purpose in life, can you make you more intentional in your actions and bring you more success in your business, your relationships and your life? So let's go. Welcome, everybody, to find your purpose. This is Jane Gardner and welcome. Today on our show, we have Michelle Burke of bossibly, and she aids young professionals and business leaders to become influential, influential leaders, to maintain the strength and core values, to help them create a culture of engagement which fosters predictable results and accountability. And awesome. I love this idea. So welcome, Michelle. I'm just blown away by you have coming by. So thank you for coming. And thank you, Michelle. Thank you for having me. Jane, I really appreciate it. It's great to have a chat with you today. That's great. Michelle, one of my little things that I love to do is to ask how you got to where you are and what your purpose you feel is what you're doing now and what your purpose is. So if you could give us an idea on that, Michelle, that would be great. That's my little payment back for coming on to my interview. Yeah, I would be happy to. So I have been coaching for years, even in corporate America. I love I have people coming to me for a problem, a problem. B, this is going on. Can you help me? And I think it was a couple of years ago, a former mentor of mine came to me and said, my daughter just graduated college, her master's degree. She was working with a team. She's now a leader in her own right. And he said, so she's having trouble with this team. I know. I know I can help her, but I'm her dad. That's probably going to end badly. I don't think I should be mentoring my daughter as a leader. So would you be willing to help her? And I'm like, oh, I would be honored to do that, Mike. I would love to give back in that way. And then the same. And two days later, I had a friend of mine who's a CEO of a business. She hires individuals and she said, I can attract them. I can hire them, but I can't engage them and retain them. Do you have anything in your bag of tricks that you can give me to help me? And I'm like, this is a thing within two days, three days of one another, these things are happening like there's something here. So that's how it possibly was born. Wow. Wow. Yeah. I love the idea that you're a mentor for for your friend, because I think a lot of people are just not aware of the need for having leadership training when you're hired as as a manager or a leader. And, you know, it's great that people are actually asking you. So this is amazing. Michelle, do you have an idea on maybe a story that you could tell us about one of your how you've been able to have the success that you've had with leadership training? Yeah, so it's a combination of training and coaching. And we were working with an organization right now who is scaling. And part of that scaling means that they're looking at increasing the revenue going from a two million dollar business to a ten million dollar business. And that that in of itself is tricky. When you have people that do they understand the vision, the purpose for the organization. And so this woman owned business has wonderful people on her team. However, they're not all. So let's use the boat analogy. They're all in the boat, but they're not rowing in unison. There's there's challenges, there's conflict. They're not working together. They don't understand their roles and responsibilities. And so while these they have great team members and teammates as part of this business. They're not positioned to scale. They don't have the processes in place, they don't have the roles and responsibilities delineated for the different individuals, they don't know how to handle conflict. And then they, the leaders of the business, are not showing up in a way to navigate where they should go and how they should get there. Wow. So so what when you come in to talk to them, obviously you find out what's wrong and then what's what's the first step. So they had no information on the roles and responsibilities of each of the team members. That's that's that's correct. Now it's not good. And so the first step is usually some type of assessment. Now, Jane, you and I were talking about the assessments are great. It gives you some insight to what's happening, what's happening, what's going sideways, where should they focus first? And provided they have their mission and their vision, they know where they're headed. And that and that they actually had that. They also we did a values exercise. So what is the organization's values? So do they have the right people or are they aligned with the people on the bus? Do they have the right people with the right values on the bus? Are they working with the right clients? And there were some situations where they weren't necessarily working with the right clients because quality is their number one value. And then they were doing projects for companies where those companies were cost focus and they were spending money, their own money on executing a project because quality was more important than the money for their clients. So that's a problem. So those assessments help drive what's going on in the business and where should we focus first? So what are those goals that we need to tackle and the actions? So a 90 day action plan to determine how we're going to get where we need to be and what? I mean, there's so many things you can do in a business, right? So you can't do all the things. What's going to make the most impact right now and how do you fix those things and then move further down the list? Oh, wow. So you do do a directional evaluation as well as just finding out their values and who the people are that are working there. So so how do you work getting them to prioritize and make sure that is that with the values that you use, they use to find out what direction they should go and and what happens when you help them? Like how does it increase their income and business, though? There's a few pieces to that. The first piece is the profit and payback assessment. So they take that assessment, they take a value assessment and those will help us determine what their values are, what challenges exist in their business in order for us to ascertain where we should start. That's provided that they have their vision and mission already. If they don't have that and they don't know where they're headed and why, we start there and then build the values and then determine the goals, which ultimately creates that action plan and the action plan and that that 90 day action plan, as it's measurable, it has dates. This is what you need to do in order to get where you need to go. That's that's the start of it. Yeah, that's amazing. Thank you. Because you were saying that you were able to increase million for one of your clients by working with this. What do you think really helped the most for them in their action plan to increase their income in the millions? I mean, that's an amazing case study that you have. So they're still in process. They're not they're not to 10 million. They're moving the needle, right? They're moving the needle in the right direction from two million to three. But the the way to do that, there's an amazing book. So those business owners that that need some assistance right now and there are some people like to do it on their own or some type. Sometimes they need help or they come to you or I write there's a book called Profit First. And you need to know your numbers, meaning where where are you spending your money? Do you understand your cash flow? Have you assessed what's coming in? What's going out? Are you looking at I mean, making more money is important, but it's just as important to see what you're spending it on and and how you're spending it. Should you be spending it? What is your what are your expenses look like? And have you captured that information and done the analysis to see where you need to go, what you need to cut? Are you paying yourself because so many businesses say, well, I just need more sales, I need more sales? Well, sales don't necessarily translate into profit if you're not managing your expenses. Right. I didn't realize you were that practical. That's awesome, because I'm also a practical person having and being in business with my husband. We are all the time looking at your numbers, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. So this is very exciting to know that just by defining your values and finding out what the people are in your team, you can help with the communication. So what do you do with the leader? Do you do any private coaching with them as well just to make sure they're on track or have you in this specific example? What we did was have a leader, the leader, and what's working within their team, what's not working within their team. What do they see happening? Going well, going sideways, almost almost like treating it like a lessons learned current state. What's what's what's happening right now. And one of the the pieces of advice that I. Give to the business owners and I'm working with provided they have a team of people underneath them, is to ask these three questions. These three questions are game changers. The first question is and this is so let's let's assume the leader, the business owner is the CEO or let's assume they're the CEO. And let's say they have a team of eight or 10 people. The CEO can sit down one on one with each member of their team and ask these three questions. What should I start doing? What should I stop doing? And what should I continue doing? And so that then gives them information to understand. What their team may be, what they're their subordinate, what that's the team member, how they feel about what's going on in the business and if they're doing something wrong or if they're doing something right, is there some sort of pet peeve or are they bothered in some way? And if they ask this question on a regular basis, they get the information to change behavior, to change their own behavior, to get the results from the teammates that are on their team head in the right direction. Wow, that sounds great. And of course, you must make make it a safe environment for the team to get together. And well, obviously, the team and each team member and the leader would get together. Personally, I don't think they'd want to to hear any pet peeves and things in a team environment. But I'm sure you make a good environment for for all these conversations and show them to show them how to do it and make sure it's safe. Good environment for them today. I like to ask especially leadership coaches and advisors, what with the pandemic, how? Well, you know, right now, I mean, you don't really need to change what you're doing, but what are you finding in the in the time right now in terms of there must be a lot of anxiety from the leaders that you have to calm. And obviously, they've probably laid off a few people. I don't know. But you're in the environment. How's it going with leaders right now in terms of the pandemic? Have you have you been able to work with them and help them ease their fears and all that kind of thing these days? So I think there is a there's a fair amount of fear that's taking place. But that's also there's an opportunity for growth. So it's not necessarily all fear based. It depends on how you use what lens you use. I suppose there are there are individuals that are leaders that that certainly have had to to let go staff. And I've seen this done well and I've seen this done poorly. The ones that are doing it well are having if if they have an environment, a positive culture, a positive climate, and they have an environment to trust, they're able to share. So here's here's an example. One of the leaders that I've seen do this really well has said I've never been in a pandemic before. I don't know how to handle this. I'm going to do the best I can. I'm going to be open and up front with you. I am really attempting to save everybody's jobs and we are going to cut costs. We're going to minimize how much we spend in other areas in order to keep the jobs to keep you on the team. And the minute that I feel that we're going to have to do something different, I will let you know. And that's the best I can do, is keep you in the loop, keep you keep open communication and keep the trust that I have with you today. And so that's that and the opposite. What I've seen some leaders do is shut down, not communicate. They are paralyzed by the fear and they're not sharing information or they cut a team member or two without the open dialogue. And then that puts the rest of the team on notice, like, oh, maybe I got to find another job. Oh, maybe I need to go somewhere else. So I think those are two very good examples of a good way to do it and the not so good way to do it. Yeah, that's great. Those are great examples. Thank you, Michelle, because, you know, a lot of people are thinking about this right now. And certainly there's hope in the future and we'll be happy to be working later. But I'm going to finish off here with showing people your assessment and where it's located. Maybe you could. And they can also see your information about yourself. Maybe you could just mention a bit about the assessment and what it's assessing. Of course. Of course, though, this is the profit and payback assessment. And the what it is assessing is where are you at in your business? It talks about the money, the profitability of your business. It talks about vision and values, which we cover here today. It talks about your team. How, what, how how are you working with your team? Are you getting the most out of your people? And so and it also talks about your commitment to actually do anything about those areas that might be not so great in your business so that it is a what we like to call We would like to call this the you are here mall map for your business right now, if I know and a lot of people are going to all these days. But if you are in the mall and you go to the map, you have the little dot of, oh, I'm right here. So that is our way of helping businesses figure out where they're at in their business profitability and payback with their team. Oh, awesome. Awesome. Thank you, Michelle. I know. I know the time is is is about to expire and you're very busy. So thank you for coming today on this. Very illuminating for me. I appreciate you talking about the pandemic. Even though it'll be going away. There's still leadership issues when it comes to in any crisis. So thank you very much for coming. And thank you, Michelle. Thank you so much for having me, Jane. I really appreciate it. Yeah. So thank you. Thanks a lot, Michelle and next time we'll be talking more in depth about leadership with Michelle, because I've got her. I'm hoping to come back in January with me. So thank you, Michelle. You can check out Michelle's free assessment at http:// profit and payback.Com, or for those who you need to spell it, it's http colon, backslash, backslash p r o f i t a n dpay b a ck dot com. Thank you for listening. For more on finding your purpose, go to https:// finding your purpose TV dot com and you can find us on Roku and finding your purpose as well. You can find us on YouTube. Look for finding your purpose. See you there.

  • Hello, this is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose, and today we're on a mission to create awareness that being self-aware of your personality and your purpose in life, can you make you more intentional in your actions and bring you more success in your business, your relationships and your life? So let's go. Welcome, everybody. This is Jane Gardner of Finding Your Purpose TV, and today I'm so excited to have another purpose driven business person on Spotlight for finding your purpose TV. And today it is Patrick Reilly. Welcome, Patrick. Patrick is an executive coach and consultant with more than twenty five years of experience supporting leaders. And I'm really excited because I love talking about leadership and he's looking to develop their executive presence so people listen and learn when they speak. So welcome. Patrick, I just want to say hello. Hello, Patrick. Nice to see you. How are you? Yes, it's a great day. It looks wonderful there. That's for sure. Patrick, I'd like to know how you got to the journey where you are now talking about leadership. That would be great. Sure, you know, it's very interesting, I sort of fell into it to a certain extent, I had a business opportunity that that showed up many years ago and I was invited to work on what at the time was an extremely large organizational change and consulting project. And it was it was really the biggest thing at the time. And it was a lot, quite frankly, I would say I was in way over my head, but they needed resources and apparently I was a quick learner. So that's how literally how I got started. And the other thing I would say that I think pertains to our conversation is that even though at the time what we did was called organizational consulting, it had a lot of the elements of what we call executive coaching today. So it was kind of a blended situation. And what I would say then and what I would say now and certainly you can see it today in many ways in our current world, is how much impact quality leadership has and that when you have a quality leader or leaders, things get done, things get done. Well, the world moves ahead. People have a better, better lives in front of them. And when you have ineffective leadership, things don't go so well. The problems become worse. They multiply. And so to me, when you have someone who is leading an organization or leading pieces of an organization and when they set a good direction that people can follow, want to follow, are excited about following, you can really get a lot of good stuff done, whether it's in the government, whether it's in industry, whether it's in business, whether it's in the nonprofit arena and anything, any place in our societies where it requires more than an individual to get things done. Good leadership makes a very, very big difference. And so I'm about making a difference and helping others to make a difference. And I really find myself ideally suited as being a catalyst, if you would, to helping leaders move themselves ahead and become better at what they do. So then does that answer your question, yeah, that's that's great, that's so exciting because I love talking about leadership. I'll just tell you a quick story in that you would probably be able to know the answer to. When I was working as a drafter, I worked in an engineering firm and it was a pretty crippled environment. And I was wondering if you have any stories on how you helped leaders to do help. I mean, it's not just a leader. It's it's the whole environment and the team and the landscape there would be wonderful if you could give us a story or two or. OK, well, you know, interestingly enough, a subset of what it is that I do is I actually have a niche specialty that I practice sometimes where I work with leaders who are very good at what they do, but are not very good into relating to other people. And so there's a there's a number of occasions where I've worked with people and I have one story at the top of my head. I was working with this gentleman. He was a very effective salesperson in the technology space and he had been recruited to another company. His boss had moved there. And so he used people die for killer salespeople and he knew how to sell. He also had developed an expertise in the industry vertical that the new company had moved into. So he was brought in and he just didn't know how to talk to people in the new environment. And in fact, the very first meeting that I went to with his team at the first break, I was shocked to see a number of people scurry outside and it was warm out and they picked up their cell phones and I asked them what they were doing and they were all calling their people because of some things that he'd said and done in the meeting. And even though he got results, he got them in a way that really alienated people. And in particular, he just didn't know how to adjust to the culture in the new organization, which was much more team oriented consensus building. And I remember him saying to me quite a number of times, he said, well, this used to work where it was before. He says, I'm a senior vice president. I figure things out and make a decision and boom, we go. And he says here, it drives me nuts because I get that. And then I have to go to my bosses meeting and I have other PR executive vice presidents and they started asking me questions about this. And can you do that? And why can't we do that? And it's it's driving me out of my mind. But I'll never forget the day that. And so he is his job was on the line. So I'll never forget the day that we were having a meeting at a hotel restaurant just outside of Chicago. And I'll have to say this in a polite way, because I'm not going to use some of the words he used. They're not in the dictionary. But he said to me, he said, look, you said you mean to tell me we've talked to all these people on my team. You interview people, you use these assessments. And you mean to tell me that if I start to talk to my employees the way that I talk to my wife and daughter, that that's it. They want me to do that. If I do that and I talk like that. And so we went through this about three different times. He gave me this look and I said, yes, Mark. That's correct. And he knew because I'd been around him and I'd seen him talk to his wife and daughter. And he was very polite, very respectful, solicitous. And finally he looks at me and he goes, You're not kidding me, are you? And I said, No, I'm not kidding. You only did. But finally, he kind of got after the third time that that was it. And. Now, this part is my imagination to say this specifically, this gentleman is of color, he's African-American. I still remember his face in my mind turning red when that happened. Now, that's not possible. It's not physiologically possible. But what happened is he had this moment of epiphany and realization that. He knew how to do something. He knew how to communicate very well. He knew how to do that with his wife and daughter. I will say one part of his family and what he didn't realize and didn't know how to do was to talk in the same respectful way to the people who worked for his team. And it blew his mind and he was totally capable of it. He just didn't see that he needed to do that and that his world changed and the world of his team and the world in that part of his company changed as a result of the work we did. And so he went from being a leader that people wanted to get rid of, were irritated with or upset with, had a lot of, I'll say, nonconstructive conversations with and about when he got the idea and he started to practice speaking respectfully, the world that he inhabited changed, and he became a much more effective and impactful leader who understood his his purpose as a leader, much better. So that's one that comes to mind. Well, that's that's amazing. Well, now I'm pretty sure I mean, it's quite a compelling moment. Yes, of course. I did confess that. I do remember his face turned red, which I know is possible, but it was a signature moment. I think he realized that. That's excellent. So so what is your process, your three areas of how you talk to get the leader to start getting the team to work together with them and that kind of thing? I know, because it's all different for many different processes, so it'd be great. So there's a number of things is that one thing at inception is that all leaders need to do some work and figure out what's their leadership style, because it's not a one size fits all kind of thing. And I look like I look a clearly Caucasian male. I've got a few air-to-air on the tires, et cetera. I've worked in certain places, so which by definition means I've not worked in other places. I've had a certain background and growing up. So I have to be myself and bring what I know forward. Right. So the first thing is I have to figure out my style is and the second thing I would say is that people are always looking for direction, if you want to call it vision from their leader, which is how do we do things here? How are you going to do things? And if we follow the lead that you set, what's the payoff? What are we going to get both personally and professionally from working with you? And have you created a vision and strategy for moving forward that we want to follow? And that's going to make a difference. Most of us want to do work that makes a difference. We want to solve problems. We want to help people. If you work in a technology company building a new product that people think is cool, want to pay for us is one thing. If you work in a biotech company, those people are driven primarily by two things that they really want to advance science and they want to build products that help patients. So it's your mother, my mother, your aunt, et cetera. They want to do that. If you're in the construction business, you want to put together a building that people will use and feel good about using. Right. So if you build a hospital and you do a good job of that, you built a place that helps the doctors and the medical staff take patients and help them. Right. So people want to be engaged in work where they feel like they're learning things. They're using their best self and they're making some they're making a difference and they're making things happen. And that's what turns people on. So it's up to the leader to think about what is it? Here's a simple way of learning to think about it. What are the tasks that we are responsible for as a team? What is it my boss or the organization has given us to do? And what are the capabilities we have to get those tasks done? What's the gap between the two and how do we attend to that by either importing additional capabilities, building some new skills and capabilities so that we have the right skills and capabilities relative to the tasks. And then part of my work is as the leader is getting the team, the right team in place and getting the team to gel. So they work together and then providing this direction forward so that people seize the phrase that people use a lot today. Today's North Star is I have to articulate or depict the North Star for the teams so they know and go, wow, that's cool or that's interesting. That really looks like something I want to work towards and work on. And that's a great use of my time and energy. So that's what I think has to do. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Knowing what the vision is and what direction you're going really helps, I think, for a team and so that people don't have motivation. And yeah, you have to motivate them for sure and respect them, otherwise they won't. So I'm going to give you a tough question because I am going to talk about the pandemic. And there are a lot of companies in crises and they're all scared. And as a executive coach and consultant, I'd like to find out what you feel you could do to help a company, because, of course, they'll have to be hiring, be switching and et cetera, et cetera. So it's quite an unusual time. But I have to ask, OK, well, you would not be the first person who's asked me that question if it is ever present at the moment. Right. And so so the thing that I hear mostly is people say, well, here's part of the problem. One is it's hard to be connected now. Right. There's so much noise around and tumult that there's so many things. So there is the pandemic and then there's the economy that's faltered. And they have a lot of people who are out of work. And you have a lot of fear and anxiety. And people report that they're way more exhausted than usual. So there's so much stress that people are fatigued so that that's a piece. But what I hear are two or three prevailing themes, if you would. One is around connection. So many of us are not working together anymore. We're working remotely or some people are at the office and some people are not. And so how do you go about getting connected? Because almost no work is done today except by a team. Right. So you have to how do you get them connected? And then if you if you reference the Google study from a number of years ago, once you do that, how do you create an atmosphere, ambience of psychological safety? Because that based on the data or the research, that's the single most important factor to team productivity. People have to feel safe so they can speak up, ask questions, maybe say something that's maybe other people disagree with or may seem as a dumb idea. Right. So they have to be able to do that. The second piece is that there's a real drop in production here that not just from the leaders, but which surprised me is from the members of their teams. They just don't feel that they can get as much done. Now, some people are more productive working on their own. Some people are not. However, at the end of the day, if in order to get a product out the door to deliver a service, I have to work with you, Jane, and 12 other people just being productive on my own, is not it? So we have to find a way to bring the resources together and create the product or service in the delivery system to make that happen. So that's a that's a big piece. And then the third piece that I hear is that people have lost the edge that they have for innovation, that people are not able to quite as easily or quickly think about what's next, what can we build, how do we do that? What's the next kind of food or application or delivery service that people are going to want and that so many people are limited in that capacity right now. Now, the flip side of that is, ironically, there's always someone who profits from a downside. So a couple of things. You see that zoom, which they're doing gangbusters and peloton and home exercise equipment are doing great. And also, you see, the hardware business is is doing fabulous. Right, because people are just. Well, I. Told you earlier, I'm doing some painting on my house right now, but that's a big business and another one I have a client that's in the RV business, and believe it or not, that is one of the most booming businesses in North America at the moment because people are not able to take vacations or they're more concerned about it and they still want to take vacation. So that's a way to take a vacation, get out of the house, get away from home and be safe within your own four walls, if you would. So, yeah, that's that's wow. I mean, I think I think all they have to do is get you to speak about what's next and innovation. And they should be getting going on that because I think a lot of things are changing. But as you know, if you look at historic studies of innovation, there are a lot of it comes because there's the right set up or the context for it. Right. If you don't have the right people with the right skills and experience and you don't create an atmosphere or climate where they can think and prosper individually, collectively, there's no innovation. Right. And the world moves ahead because we're always looking for the next thing. It's just in human nature. And well, case in point, if I think about the very first Apple computer I had and the IT and the tool that I'm talking to you on today, there's there's it's like light years difference is what happens and what can happen and all that sort of stuff. So where once we get to a certain level with a with a product or service, we want the next thing felt like that. So that is that is the one answer. Yeah, that's wonderful. I didn't even think of connections being the important thing right now. I do know that obviously a lot of people are have certain companies that are doing well. But I think every company should and should get some advice from you in terms of what you know, so they don't get stuck wondering what to cover everyone. But because it's just like you, I got one hundred and sixty eight hours a week. OK, well, I think I think we'll maybe talk about your your offer to everybody. If you don't mind. I'm going to put the screen up and this is wonderful that you're here. I have a feeling you're going to be really your website's going to be just amazing and talking about all these challenges we're going to have in the next few months. And you were mentioning that you are interested in free 30 minute consult. You're welcome to look who's welcome to talk to you about that. Is this anyone who's an executive leader who is thinking that they may need to develop some insight to see things differently or better develop some new perspectives to to move their organization forward and something that we haven't touched on? I just. Yeah, please to is to me, it's an essential element. Here is what I call a development of executive presence in that. If I want you to listen to me, if I want my team to listen to me, if I want a number of vendors and suppliers and regulators and other other people in the marketplace to listen to me, I have to find a way to bring myself forward that you want to listen and that a large number of people want to listen to what I have to say. If I want to have impact as a leader. And it's not always the only element, but it is the sole element. Excuse me, but it is always an element of what it takes to get a wider audience of people to pay attention and to listen to me. And so I spent a lot of time working and studying with my mentor in this area. His name is Bob Sadler, as well as other folks. And what I found is that there are three core components that a leader has to develop for her or himself in order to. Increase their gravitas to be someone that people listen to or want to listen to, and so let me articulate that one clearly is in the language that you used. So it's in the diction and the pace of what you say. So you have to be able to say what you're saying in a way that the audience can understand it. And you have to be clear, you can't use too many words, but you have to tell the full story. So it's about. The structure and the pacing of what you say so that people want to hear what's being said. Second piece. Has to do with your body and how you use that, because a lot of our enthusiasm and energy comes through our body, even though now most of that is happening through video. Right. Or some some tool or other. And you're not seeing me in person. I'm not seeing you in person. There's still something about energy which that's something clearly that actors learn to to to use. Right. You learn how to tell a story, if you would, through your physical body. And the third piece is, is there kind of close? I see them as different. Is is some of it is the the way you use your body to deliver a message and the energy that comes from you in the delivering of that. And just if I can make fun, people sometimes will will mock people from certain cultures because they talk so much with their hands that it's distracting. On the other hand, when you just sit there and nothing moves, it's distracting in a different way. So a big piece of using myself is in a way that others want to listen or will want to listen is the words how I say them. Are they pronounced clearly and is it said at a pace where you can digest and ingested? And the second piece is the language of my body to talk about that. And the physical piece of it. So those are the three. So that's a lot of what it is that we have to work on in order to get people to. If you would, listen to a news story or a revised story so that they want to pay attention and follow our lead. Oh, wow. That's a big piece of it. Does it make sense? Yeah, that makes sense. And I didn't think of it as being that important. But you're right, a lot of times people ignore the leader when they're when they don't have a presence. So I didn't think of that. I'll think about it just like some some newscaster. And some of them are like, wow, she's interesting. And other people like her. But I'm changing the channel. Or certain actors and actresses, they get they they're in front of us, whether it's on stage or on video or TV. And they draw us in by what they say, how they interact with people, their movement of their body. And that's part of what we have to learn to do so that people want to hear the story we have. Really, that's that's it. And another aspect of it then, in terms of the words is, do you have a story? That people want to hear that makes sense to them, like the story I told you about the gentleman who worked with a number of years ago who was just wasn't very respectful to his team or his staff and that people were not following him. And so he had to learn how to speak respectfully. So that's a story that depicts for people what we're talking about. And it's in this telling of the story and the telling it of, well, that draws people in and they go, huh? Let me listen to that guy, Patrick. He's got he's got some ideas worthy of paying attention to. Right. Right. So, yeah, I didn't think of that component for leadership. So that's that's very interesting. Critical, isn't it? And yes, I still have to whether if I'm a lawyer, I have to be a good lawyer. If I'm a software developer, I have to be good at that. If I'm an engineer, it builds hospitals. I have to be good at that. So that is necessary for me to get the job. But those domain skills or expertise are not sufficient for me to be the quality leader of the people who were doing the job right. I would call it evolution of an individual as a leader. Right. So you wouldn't hire me, for example, to to to make chicken sausages for you if I didn't know something about that and I had demonstrated some expertise. And then you'd been at a barbecue somewhere and you said, wow, those are the best sausages I've ever had. Who makes them your friends? And they all go to Patrick Riley's sausage house. That's where you get them. And if you wanted to learn more about that, you would talk to me, because I would obviously have some expertise in that. But if I then said, wow, these are good and I want to build a company around quality organic chicken sausages. My role has to change over time because I have to set a direction, as I said before, I have to get the resources. I have to know about how to build a business, what you do, where the money comes from, how to manage the money. And then I have to figure out who are the people I have to hire, what positions or roles do I need for them to play, and then how do I get them to gel or coalesce or work together so that we have an efficient and effective operation? And then. If it's a business, it's not enough for me to just sell my chicken sausages to you and your five friends, I've got to make it much bigger in order for it to be economically viable for me and and all the people that work for me. So, yeah, you're obviously hungry. Yeah, I can always, always about. But I just I do want to mention and have you express I like the idea of yourself calling yourself anethnographer, because I think that's really important in the culture of teams and to understand culture for sure. So ethnography is what is is the study of culture. Right. And I say this all the time, right? So if you were to get me a little nice little airplane and drop me somewhere in the middle of China tomorrow, I would know immediately that I was in a different culture because the people would look different than I do. Right. And then also people, depending what most likely would be speaking Mandarin or some dialect thereof. And I'd go, oh, I'm I must be in China. Right. And that means by definition, that I'm not in Canada or the United States. And so the rules of the game or the norms of the culture are going to be different. The foods that people eat, the distances that people keep in public are different. The habits that are endemic to the culture are different than they would be in Canada or the United States, for example. Right. On the other hand, my opinion is that is located near Silicon Valley, outside of San Francisco, that if you plunk me into a tech company right in the morning and tech company B in the afternoon, the people might look very similar and most of them will be speaking in English and they're building technical products. On the other hand, when you sit and observe, what you notice is that the rules of the game are very different. If you spend enough time. What how people say things, what? OK, it's not OK who you talk to, how do you talk to people who are just as different as they would be between being in China or Canada? It's just that. It's a little more subtle, and so in order to be helpful as an executive coach or consultant, you actually have to become really good at what I call observational intelligence. That's my own phrase. Interestingly, it's made up, but essentially what it means is I have to be able to see hot. So when she says that. What does that mean here? How is that taken and how is that understood? I recall one time when I was introduced to the first time to work at a big health care organization, the gentleman who hired me, he stopped at the door and he said. Do you know about the nod and I said I looked and I was like, no, I thought, geez, I missed something here. And he says, Well, let me tell you about the nod. And he said, so the nod here in our organization means this, it means that you're in a meeting with me or meeting with a bunch of us and everything's great, Jane. That's terrific, Frank. That's really good, Coolio. OK, great. And then I walk out the door and I nod my head and then I make a derogatory comment. So the point being is that in that culture, not everything you see and hear is exactly what people think and feel. So you have to be able to pick up on the disparity and get clarity about what people's real thoughts and feelings are. So in order to help. A leader to effectively navigate in their environment. That's a piece of what they have to touch on. And this is also, as I said to you earlier when we were talking, is is sort of a new aspect or component of my thinking is that for leaders to be really effective in understanding the culture and understanding the ethnography, I think there's three core components that they have to know and understand and figure out how they work together. And those three things in my mind are one we've touched on, which is what are the what are the norms, attributes of the culture we're in? What are the rules of the game here? Secondly, what are the politics at play in the organization? And I don't necessarily mean that in a negative way, because I know that politics these days often has a negative meaning or connotation for folks. What does that mean? It means this. It means how do I talk to this person there to get things done? Do I have to go and speak to the people who report to her first and get them to sell her on this? Is it OK for me to speak up, given my role in a senior executive meeting or not? So to me, it's how do I go about in influence and create impact that's effective in this culture? So to me, that's the politics of it. And then the third piece, if I want to be effective, is. How do I conduct myself? And the answer is fairly simple, as I say one thing and then I do that, but how do I behave in a way that engender trust? And so when cognizant of the culture, when I'm aware of the rules of the game of politics in my organization or the organization I'm in, and how do I influence and impact and then what do I do and say to build trust so that people follow me when I put those three together. Right. Triangle of power, I can be much more effective and influential as a leader. So to me. But you. You have to observe that it's not something that you study in school, and so it requires a different kind of you could say, yes, there's some components of emotional and social intelligence. But I also would say that I would add another element that I call observational intelligence that a leader has to develop so that she or he knows how to be successful to navigate the landscape there. That's all right. It's not easy being fully facetious, but. Yeah, Sam, you help. Yes, actually, they would not be getting their money's worth when they are getting the value if I didn't help them with that. So, yes, a big I mean, if you would, the two core components of the work that I do with leaders and there are other pieces with helping them to develop your executive presence and then also increasing their awareness and ability to apply the integration of the trust to the political landscape and the culture. So. And. That requires learning some new things and then engaging in deliberate practice, so you get better at that. So the more you do those things, you have more success more often. So you're hitting the ball or in your court, you're hitting the puck better. More often. My culture, yes. So I just won. One last question. Interesting question for the norms and the culture. And some sometimes it's not working. And and so you try and assess that and then give the leader direction as to how to make it wor

  • Hello, this is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose, and today we're on a mission to create awareness that being self-aware of your personality and your purpose in life, can you make you more intentional in your actions and bring you more success in your business, your relationships and your life? So let's go. Welcome, everybody. This is Jane Gardner finding your purpose TV and today on finding your purpose Spotlight, we're talking to Jann Freed, PhD. Sorry, my apologies to Dr. Jan Freed, Ph.D. She was a college professor of business management and leadership. And after 30 years as a tenured professor and endowment chair, she started an encore career as a leadership development and change management consultant. And she is the author of several books and co-author of a list of five books. And her last book is Leading with Wisdom Sage Advice from One Hundred Experts, which we'll be talking about. And we'll also be talking about her new book. So, Jann, welcome. Welcome. Please just say hello and say hello.

    I'm pleased to be here. And it was nice to make a connection with Jane. And thank you very much for inviting me to your show. Oh, thank you.

    Thank you. Jan, one of the things that I love to talk about with people is finding their purpose. And obviously, you've been doing your purpose for a long time. So but I'd like to talk about your new purpose, which is the Leadership Development and change management consultant and how you got to that journey, because, of course, you previously were in academics. So thank you. How did that happen?

    Yeah, well, it's interesting. So I fell into higher education teaching and absolutely loved it, had a lot of different courses. And but I had to drive two hours a day, an hour each way to get to my work and. When my kids graduate from college, my husband said, you know, we can afford to take a risk, you're tired of driving. And I wanted to I was at the stage of my life where I want to give back to the community. And I couldn't give back to the community where I live because I worked out of town and I couldn't give back to where I worked because I lived out of town. So I had to make a change and I have not looked back. Fortunately, I was able to teach a graduate leadership course for a different university for the past 10 years. So I kept my foot into teaching. And as a leadership development person, you know, I do workshops, I do speaking, I do some coaching. And it's really the same skill set that I enjoyed so much when I was teaching full time. So I eliminated grading papers, which is always kind of the hardest part about teaching. So I don't have to do that. And I can still use some of the same skills and I have just loved it. And so that's kind of been my journey taking really kind of taking the same skills that I like to use, but to a different audience.

    Oh, wow. Yeah, that's great. And I guess you probably started writing books when you were in academics because that's probably one of the requirements. But you're now doing maybe you could tell us when you started your leadership book, Leading with Wisdom and that you're writing a new one. And what what we can claim from that.

    I know that's that's good, Jane. I really started the leadership book. I was on sabbatical in two thousand or two thousand five, and my oldest son was graduating from high school and I wanted to be home more with since that was his last year home. But in order to get a sabbatical, I had a research project. So I started this project. And it's kind of interesting. I met Jim Collins, author of Good to Great, and he was speaking at a big presentation, giving a big presentation where I live. And I was able to kind of chat with him afterwards. And in talking with him, he said, give me a call. We'll talk about this, because I asked if I could be an apprentice, if I could come study under him. I said I was going to be on sabbatical and I wanted to learn from him. Would that be possible? And he said, well, I've never had anybody asked me that before. So he said, why don't you give me a call? So I called him and we had a conversation and he said, you know, you don't need to come learn from me. He said, let's just talk about what it is you want to do. So he asked me several questions and I said, well, I love to interview people. I love to you know, leadership is my focus. I had I held an endowed chair in leadership and character development. And so I said, that's my focus. I love to interview people. And he said, well, everybody's he said there are a lot of people writing leadership books and everybody's got the seven habits of this or the ten principles of that. And he said no one's really tying it together. So he said, why don't you be that person? So why don't you reach out, interview some of the top people and analyze the data and tie it together. So I set off on this journey and it says Sage advice from one hundred experts. But I really interviewed more than one hundred people. And I continue to interview people. It's just kind of a hobby. And I have a blog and I have a podcast series called Becoming a Sage. And you can learn more about that on my website. But so I started interviewing these people and that was about in twenty five and about 2010, I was now maybe nine twenty nine. I was done interviewing people basically for the book and I started analyzing the data and then I started contacting publishers. And the book was published by ATT Association for Training and Development. And each chapter is a theme that emerged out of the research. And so I'm really proud of the book because I think it's timeless, it's not it's not really what I think it's what I learned from interviewing what I think some of the top thought leaders in the field, some of these people have now are now deceased, such as Warren Benis and William Bridges, a real expert on transitions. Angelas, Arean, I integrate a lot of different areas of which I looked for experts, but I think it's timeless what I learned and we can talk more about that. So anyway, that's about sage advice from one hundred. Oh, well, yeah. So it's actually it's actually quite an older book in the in that year, you know, before what the Internet is now.

    So that's awesome because some good is great. I've got that upstairs and I haven't read it yet, so I'm going to have to read it now that, you know, you have met him at this point. The phrase good to go you here. You're talking about that. Yeah, right.

    Oh, yeah. It was published in 2013. But I really do think the methodology that I used and the analysis that I did, I really think it's timeless. And what's interesting, Jane, is my driving question. I had I really only had five questions and then I would probe. But my driving question was, how can I best prepare people to be the kinds of leaders needed in these uncertain times? Since the book was published, the times have only become more uncertain. So I think the time the book is even more relevant now than when it was published.

    Oh, yeah, I've got the book and I haven't read it yet, so we'll be talking at another time again about the book and leadership. But but for now, maybe we could just have a quick summary of maybe well, it's some of the top tips from the leaders that you also use in your practice. Obviously, when you're doing your change management, leadership development that you've incorporated into your own training, that would be great.

    Yeah, well, again, I know this is on your website, but if if listeners go to my website. Yeah, you can download my top ten tips for leading during crises and they really come out of my book. But what I would share right now is the fact that leaders during this pandemic, the critical skills or what we call the soft skills, and these are the skills that are often not taught in business schools, in business courses, you know, maybe in organizational behavior or leadership. But the soft skills are those that are hard to they're qualitative. They're not quantitative. They're I say the answers are not in the back of the book. So the soft skills are those interpersonal dynamic relationships skills. And when I'm doing workshops and courses and teaching and coaching, I emphasize that leadership is not about a position, it's not about a title, it's about a relationship. And so there is not a time when relationships and creating and cultivating and sustaining and nurturing relationships are there's not a time that's better than right now because anxiety is high emotional. Everybody's on edge, emotions are very fragile. Leaders need to pay attention to these relationships and leaders don't have to have answers. They need to just listen to what people need and reach out and check in. One of the things that I emphasize in my coaching is for leaders to just check in. You don't have to have an agenda. It doesn't have to be a meeting. Just check in and find out how are people doing, what are they willing to share? And based on what they're willing to share, then you as a leader can determine what they need. I think that's critical during during these times.

    So, yeah, that's for sure. That's that's very exciting. I'm so glad that you're in a certain place that I am in terms of leadership. I think it's very important to have those those soft skills. And you're right, they don't teach it in school. I'm not sure why, but maybe you know why.

    But there are forces. I mean, I when I go full time, I taught organizational behavior, which is a you know, a soft skill for leaders. But what I think is interesting and for your listeners, they can Google this. But at Stanford, there's a course called it's known as the touchy feely course, and it's in the Stanford MBA program. And it's it's like the most popular course on campus because of the reputation it has received over the years. And if your listeners Google this, if they just Google Stanford, touchy feely course, Stanford has just now their faculty are taking it on the road to corporations because those skills are so desperately needed. Right. And it's it's interesting to me that these are the skills that are lacking in the workplace right now. And when people are stressed and they're under when leaders are stressed and under anxiety and, you know, it's easy to forget that these are the skills that are needed. And if you don't feel comfortable practicing these skills, leaders are likely not to use them when they're needed most. So Stanford's taking this course on the road, and I find that very interesting. There was a recent article in The Wall Street Journal that talks about this saying,

    wow, I have to check that one out for sure. I had had a discussion with people. Hopefully this isn't too I mean, you know, about culture and how there's a problem with cultural differences when you're a leader. And obviously to do leadership, you need to be able to coach them on understanding different cultures for sure. Just wondering if you could just speak briefly on that, because it's something people don't really talk about, because it's sort of.

    In a way, for some right now, it's kind of interesting because, again, as you mentioned in the introduction, I taught for 30 years at an undergraduate, it was a liberal arts, small liberal arts college. And we only had undergraduate courses there. And I created a course. Now, I've been gone for 10 years. So but when I was there for twenty five years, I taught a diversity course and I called it managing and valuing cultural diversity. And then I created this whole course. And really every year when I would teach it, I would say to the students, I hope there's a year when this course is no longer needed because people just value diversity. They get it, they appreciate it. And of course, we've seen with the Black Lives Matter and women me too movement, we see where these skills are still lacking big time. Yeah. So it's kind of interesting that I taught this course for twenty five years now. What's ironic about it is these kinds of courses, people who tend to take these kinds of courses tend to already appreciate diversity. So you're kind so sometimes you're preaching to the choir for the majority of students. They love this. They love it. But in that cause, I talked about every aspect of diversity that we had, a very broad umbrella. Diversity was a broad umbrella that under this umbrella we would talk about age, religion, sexual orientation, ethnicity for sure, social status. We got into look ism. Yeah, that's great. I'm forgetting that we really talked about a wide variety of disability or very important. And then I would say they had to do a lot of reading. They had to do a lot of writing, they had to journal. And on every topic, I would bring in a guest speaker because I said to the students in the syllabus, I said, I'm a white woman. I'm a straight heterosexual white woman. I cannot speak from personal experience, from all these different aspects, so I would bring in a guest speaker and sometimes two, depending on the topic for every topic. I mean, I would bring in a former student who was blind because of an accident but had a corporate job. I would bring in people using a wheelchair. I would bring in a lesbian woman and I would bring in a lesbian couple who had kids. I would bring in someone from the Jewish perspective because the college that I taught at was faith based would from a Christian tradition. So I would bring in someone from the Jewish faith, bring in a black colleague of mine from Ethiopia, bring just a whole lot of people. And students would get their eyes open because it's so easy to just look at life and look at work from their own perspective. So to me, it was a very valuable, very moving course. And I always learned something. I would bring in at least one, if not two people living with AIDS. Oh, you know, early on when I first started teaching the course, Jane, you know, the time when people thought it was a gay,, and is how our culture has evolved since then. So it was very moving. So you're right. I mean, diversity matters. And today the whole idea is get over fears, you know, and say to the students, you don't have to understand these various aspects of diversity. You may never understand it, but you have to be respectful because you're going to be working with and for people who are different than you. And the goal is how can you be fair? And I would say to the students, we all have prejudice and figure out what they are, because if you don't acknowledge them, you can't overcome them. And I say to the students, OK, I'll share mine. I said, it's been really it's been really hard for me with tattoos because I grew up when I was younger. Tattoos were not politically correct. They weren't acceptable. And and it's become like now a fashion statement or and so I said, I've had to really overcome that. I want to be fair. And I want to be I have to realize that tattoos don't matter. And so I really had to work on that. So I think when when people like myself admit to others, I mean, we're all prejudice in some way. And but we can't overcome that if we don't acknowledge it and address it and be aware of it. That's an acknowledgement. Please be aware, because the whole goal is we need to be fair. We need to be fair. So it's amazing to me that in twenty 20, in some ways we've gone backwards. Yeah. Or some people say the conversation has started again, which, which is good.

    But I do have to say my husband would probably divorce me if I got myself a tattoo because he has the same prejudice on tattoos. Yeah. Yeah. But anyway so what's so exciting is that you're writing your new book and I do not know what death through a difference is, so I'd love to speak to you to speak on that chapter because that is that is so intriguing.

    I would say that answer a few questions here with that question. First of all, my book I've created this concept called Breadcrumb Legacy and Bread Crumb Legacy. I often say in workshops or courses or when I'm speaking, when do we leave our legacy? And people say, well, when we leave, OK, well, what do you mean by leave? Well, when we die, when we retire, when we leave a job. And I say that's true. All of that's very true. But we're leaving it all the time. What about when we leave this meeting? What about when I leave this interview with Jane right now? I'm leaving some breadcrumbs behind for all of your listeners, for all of your everyone in your audience. I'm leaving some bread crumbs right now. And sometimes bread crumbs are positive. Sometimes they're not so positive. And so when we're aware of this, I think we live our life more intentional and more thoughtful and respectful if we care about the trail we're leaving behind. And so my book is all about Breadcrumb Legacy. I don't really have an official title yet. I'm working on the chapters, but one of the chapters is called Death Through a Different Lens. And what this is about is and really this book is an outgrowth of my last book, Leading with Wisdom, because one of my conclusions in that book is it's hard to be a good leader if you're not a good person. So I'm kind of picking up where I left off. And so this Breadcrumb Legacy book, it's really about how to be a good leader and how to be a good person. And one of the fears, big fears in life is this whole idea of death. And so I developed a leadership course based on what I was learning during my research with leading with wisdom. And one of the things that I was learning is the sages said, you know, leaders need to learn about death, dying and grief because industries are dying, companies are dying, positions are evaporating and people are dealing with a lot of grief. And what I find fascinating is during the pandemic, death has become up close and personal. I mean, we're getting death by county, by state by country, by its death is up close and personal. And we're reading about it, hearing about it. In fact, in my local state my local newspaper there featuring every Sunday, they're featuring people who have died within the state, died from coping well. So it's kind of a take on 9/11 here, remembering these people, because they're not just numbers. It's easy to just think of them as statistics and they're not statistics or people and they have families. And so this whole concept of very this whole idea of death is very personal. And so when I really did kind of a deep dive, when the sages said you need to be teaching leaders about death, dying and grief, because these are again, these are skills not taught in business courses. And they were not skills that I taught in my qualitative soft skill courses. So I started integrating them and I found out that sharing what I was learning and really teaching people about grief. And I've got exercises and assignments and activities that they had to do. But teaching them about this, I found that students twenty to twenty two year old, it really resonated with them that when I would present papers about this at conferences, academic conferences, my colleagues, my peers would say, does this really go how does this go over with twenty to twenty two year olds? Aren't they too young to get this? And I would say no, it really resonates with them. And my theory is the earlier they have. These girls are younger, they are the better off they are, they live their life differently because so and we can go into more of that for sure. Yeah. Next time you've got so many topics to talk about. This is so narrow. And that's one thing I never thought about until I turned 50. Oh, are you going to be the younger people are when they understand this, I think the better off they are. Yeah, for sure. They do things differently.

    That's so great. So this is actually going to be a leadership book in that it'll be about still about your leadership and change management and everything.

    Yeah, it really it's going to kind of cross over into a couple genres in terms of leadership and human development and. Your life and you had another chapter, which, of course, is intriguing, become a nobody. I'm not sure why I would want to become a nobody. So, yeah, well, it's kind of interesting that it goes along with legacy work in terms in terms of we spend basically the first half of our life becoming somebody, whether it's in school or college in our career. We really want to become a somebody who are we become? And the last half of our life is more about becoming a nobody. It's really about, you know, one of my peers in this area, she talks about the shift from goal to role or goal to soul. So like the first half of your life, it's all about goals in the second half of your life. It's all about what role do you want to play in life or or soul? What's your soul telling you to do? And so that's really about, you know, kind of what I have become a nobody is the second half of life. It's really about what can you know, what kind of impact do you have on others or are you happy now or what do you want to have one? And that's more the soul and role versus the goal anyway. Why become a nobody is really letting go of the ego. It's not all about you anymore. It's what difference are you making? Yeah. Yeah I know, I know.

    A lot of time now I'm thinking about legacy and can I make a difference. And even in a small way with other, with other people. And that's why I'm doing this as well myself, because I don't have to do this but I want to I want to leave a legacy. I want to be able to change at least some people's other lives. So. Yeah, yeah. So so I'm going to we're going to probably wrap up for today. I am definitely going to have you again because we have so much to talk about. Yeah. I think next time we'll talk about your your old book. But today I just wanted to find out from you on your website, I forgot to ask you. I didn't realize you had a podcast. So what what's that about.

    And yeah, I do have a podcast called Becoming a Sage. And actually I just created a private Facebook group that people want to search. It's called Becoming a Sage, and that's about creating more of a conversation with people who want to talk about positive aging, conscious aging, leading with wisdom. That's what that's about. But I have a monthly podcast where I interview some of the top thought leaders in the field of positive aging. And if they find if they subscribe to my website, they would get it. So that's once a month. And if they Googled, if they just went to jann freed with two N's and two E's , if they went to jann freed podcast, they just Googled that my previous podcast would pop up. I had a leader, actually, I had a leadership summit last summer in June, and those are posted on my YouTube site. And I was asking really some really influencers, leaders at all ages, how they think leadership is going to change based on the pandemic. Go to my YouTube channel. They just Google jann freed YouTube or go to search search for jann freed, YouTube. Each one of those interviews is listed. I interviewed Bill George, the former CEO of Medtronic in Minneapolis. I interviewed I interviewed a variety of people, some answers who write about leadership at the University of Michigan. I interviewed a whole variety of people, some of the top executive coaches, I interviewed Sally Helgason, who writes a lot about women's leadership. She has many books out. I interviewed a lot of people and I would encourage people to go to my YouTube channel then. And that really focused on leadership. How that might change during because of the. So I'm I'm staying busy just like I don't have to do this. My mission is to continue to learn and share what I'm learning with others. And I do that writing, blogging, podcasts, and, of course, consulting for sure. So if so, if anyone wants to talk to you about leadership consulting and and change management, do they just go to your website or I would go to my website. I've got a contact page. They can just send me an email and they'd be wonderful. I'd love some. Wow. Yeah. Well, I do want to say I met Jane through Givitas.com. Yeah, that's for sure. That was started by Daniel Pink and it's all about giving and helping others. And so I want to thank Jane for helping me. And I offered to help Jane in any way possible. So, yeah, we're all we've got good good vibrations. I like yeah.

    I loved Daniel Pink I've got all his books, but yeah, that giving gravitas has been really good for me and getting a lot of people to volunteer for interviewing which is great. So I'd like to thank you again for coming on today and spending some time with me and we'll be spending more time for sure. So thank you very much. OK, yeah. Thank you. H

    olidays. Yes. Happy holidays. Yeah.

    For a copy of Dr. Jann's book, Leading with Wisdom, go to Amazon and for free copy of the top 10 Tips for leading during crisis's, go to www.jannfreed.com and you can search for her podcast becoming a sage as well. On Facebook. She has a private Facebook group. For those who would like to talk further about becoming a sage, thank you for listening. For more on finding your purpose, go to https:// finding your purpose TV.Com and you can find us on Roku and finding your purpose as well. You can find us on YouTube. Look for finding your purpose. See you there.

  • Hello, this is Jane Gardner of Finding your Purpose, and today we're on a mission to create awareness that being self-aware of your personality and your purpose in life, can you make you more intentional in your actions and bring you more success in your business, your relationships and your life. So let's go. Welcome, everybody, to finding your purpose, and today it's Spotlight, where we talk to purpose driven entrepreneurs. And on today's show, we're talking to Mitchell Kraus of Capital Intelligence Associates, and he's going to be talking about leveraging your wealth and to create the world you want, which sounds like a wonderful thing. Welcome, Mitchell. Please introduce yourself.

    And I'm Mitchell Kraus of Capital Intelligence Associates. I'm a wealth manager here in Santa Monica, and I've been doing this for twenty seven years now and really love working with people who believe their wealth isn't just their financial wealth, that they're trying to leverage that to create a better world and a better family and everything that they're interested in besides growing rich.

    Well well, Mitchell, what I like to do is to ask you how you got to where you are, how you found the purpose that is driving your business and creating your success. So could you tell us a little history about your company? That would be great. Thanks,

    Mitchell. Of course, I graduated in college and found myself in a job life insurance industry, and I learned very quickly that I was good at selling life insurance, but my job was to sell it to a lot of people who didn't need it. And as a fourth generation in the financial services business, my father and I had a conversation and I went to work at a financial planning firm which really found some great passion for because I was selling life insurance to those who needed it or really I was helping individuals create financial plans and reach those financial plans. And it was very fulfilling. But what I learned is in financial planning, the end all be all is sort of helping people retire towards that retirement. And I learned that a lot of people had other goals and needs besides just building wealth so they could retire some day. That I had clients and friends who not only wanted to take care of their nest egg in their portfolio, but they want to help their family, they want to raise their kids in a socially conscious way, they wanted to help their parents more broadly. They wanted to help various organizations, whether it's their church or their local non-profit. And their wealth wasn't, in the financial sense, designed to really leverage for those causes. And then I have other clients who really cared about the world, whether it's political reasons or environmental reasons. And I've learned that through the years that people can leverage the wealth they have their financial wealth to help create maybe it's social wealth, maybe it's community wealth, cultural wealth and leverage it. Sometimes I've helped friends with build their physical, their health through through their finances and realizing where they could leverage that or even build more time. And it's really people are so concentrated on their financial wealth and trying to build the biggest portfolio possible, that looking at those issues and using their financial wealth as leverage might not build as much of a financial wealth, but will create a much more meaningful position for them.

    So could you tell us a little bit more about socially responsible investing and health investing? I have not heard of health investing for your health, but of course, you know, we live in different countries. So maybe that's one of the reasons. But certainly the social and socially responsible investing, I know that I have legacies in my will, but is there other opportunities where you work?

    Yes, socially responsible, responsible investing, also known as ESG investing, so environmental, social governance investing is something that's been around for hundreds of years in some ways. And early on, a lot of the Presbyterian's actually decided that they would not invest in companies that supported the slave trade. The slave trade so goes back that far hundreds of years. And I think in a more modern approach to it, there's two fold is first asking yourself, you know, if you inherited this company, would you feel good about the business they're in? Would you want to be in this business when you buy out a business like this? And for some people, that's very much environmental issues. I wouldn't want an oil drill next door. To me, it might be more on a religious issue. And I have clients who are very religious who will not invest in companies that support certain certain things that they believe are against their religion.More on a social matter that lots of clients should not invest in for profit prisons and who doesn't want to invest in GMOs. And it's not my duty to tell an individual what their purposes and what their values are, but it's to work with them, to figure out what their values are and make sure that their financial wealth matches those values and invest in companies or invest in types of investments that match those values as far as sort of physical wealth. When I talk about that, that's more of realizing that a lot of people work so hard to build these other wealth. They don't take care of their themselves and their own their physical nature, and they get into bad health. They're worrying about these things and having these conversations and helping clients realize that everything is intertwined, that if you build, you know, millions of dollars, but then have all sorts of health problems and four hundred pounds, you're not creating the world you want to live in. And so how do you take some of the wealth you're building? And let's look at ways that maybe you can afford that physical therapist or physical trainer or whatever it might be to really round yourself out as a person and to really do what is needed to help you help yourself. And then that allows you to help the world.

    Wow. I didn't even think of that. I mean, I'm certainly I'm making plans for my retirement because I'm getting there soon. And there's always the possibility I have to go into a nursing home. But I didn't think of it. You can actually, you know, invest in certain companies that will help you in the future.

    Certainly. And so you're thinking of understanding your wealth beyond your bank account. The part about that is, of course, you're thinking I would call you a holistic approach, actually. What would you say?

    Holistic investing. And in a way, yes, I think holistic is a word that I've used a few others in the industry that work like me have used to really look at the whole person any time with me. Start before we start talking about their bank accounts and our investment accounts. We sort of talk about their values and their goals and understanding what they're trying to accomplish and what's important about money to them and understanding that will allow them allow us to figure out what needs to be done in these other areas as far as their financial wealth is concerned. A lot of my clients are more concerned with their family and how do we leverage that financial wealth to take care of their family? And for a lot of people, that's just paying for their kids college. But if you look at surveys of the wealthiest in the United States. Most really wealthy people would rather their kids inherit their values over their finances and their wealth, their financial wealth. So how do you teach your kids and your grandkids maybe your values and what's important to you? And how do they how do you help them inherit that? And I think that's part of the holistic picture.

    Yeah, for sure. Yeah, they definitely and I as I was mentioning, of course, I have a few legacies in my will. And I'm sure you speak a lot to your clients about leveraging their wealth in order to make the world better. And I was just wondering, so besides religious organizations, do you do a lot of research on on charities to make sure that when they are, you know, actually investing in things that it will actually help that charity? Or, you know, you must have to do a lot of research on things other than the stock market.

    My expertise isn't picking the greatest charities, I'm probably better at it than most people because I do spend a lot of time thinking about it, inviting clients to know how to do that, depending on the client and their needs. Most come to me with sort of causes they care about. They really have a passion for and they know who they want to give to. And I help them leverage those gifts. So when they are looking at how much they give, how much impact, they really leverage it after taxes, how they leverage it against their portfolio, making sure that there's enough money for the organization and for them. And when a client really wants to do research, there's a lot of organizations and consultants that we help them find and hire if they have a lot of wealth and they really want to. It on a very specific cause and trying to find the best of those causes. I can find a lot of great places to start, but. Going down and interviewing charities on a big picture level, I'm pretty good at and I've done that a lot to get into the very specifics. That's not my expertise. And we believe that part of working with a client is no matter how smart I am, no matter how many designations I have, I have an Ivy League degree. There's so much more I don't know than I do now. So working with other experts, finding the people who fit the needs of our individual. Clients that can bring in whether it's tax help, whether it's again bringing in and helping them find that perfect charity to really do what they want to do and really say, you know, you give a little bit to a big charity. You're drop in the ocean, you give a huge amount to a small charity. You can. Override them and overwhelm them. So it's finding that balance of what you're trying to do, how you're trying to do it, and there's so many great organizations out there and the bigger questions I have with donors and clients is, what are you trying to accomplish? And if and that's the hardest question for most people, because they don't really know that they they want to help. Here in Los Angeles, the homeless situation, but what does that mean in asking people more and more questions? You get very, very different answers. Yeah, that's great. That's great. Could you get so detailed and in, you know, down into getting them way to use the most return for their money? Because that's obviously what I try and do, is look at all my charities and make sure that they're using, you know, less money on the administration and more for their cause. And because I want to get a better return. So. So. And then so what obviously the charity is, is how the money is, as they say, given away. But how do you get them to increase their returns and you make a plan so you create a legacy plan. What what would you say in general? You would say a legacy plan is for them because of course, the charities, the money being given away and not being made, as they say. We see when we look at any client's legacy as three main areas of concern. First is their immediate family, how they handle money, how to prepare the next generation for inheritance. How do you teach them your values? How do you take care of your parents and older generation? That's what's needed to instill in profit planning. When we have plans for each of these and we sort of create a sort of like a stoplight system here. Green is what we're accomplishing. Now, here's yellow, which is sort of the next step along the way. And red is part of the long term plan. And we try to leverage all three of the aspects to each individual to make sure they're always making progress. So the second step with the charities when we look at is sometimes to look at different assets and say, OK, these assets are a good deal now, that by giving the stock you want 30 years ago now you can get a great tax deduction and not appreciation on that sort. That means so much money or they're willing to give later on. A lot of retirement plans, by the time they get to their heirs, might be worth pennies on the dollar. But if you give that to a charity fund, death while you're alive, the charity gets every single dollar. So looking at the different situations of what you're trying to do and weighing taxes, weighing immediately versus future needs, weighing all the all what you're trying to accomplish, we're always looking to refine and create a plan, a written plan of where you are now and always trying to prove that there are so many little aspects that it's impossible to set sail on a ship across the ocean to your destination and not make little changes along the way, more little changes because the world changes, the climate changes, there could be on that ship. There could be a storm ahead of you. But also people change over time and creating. And when I ask clients about investing with their values, most people I talk to about that say this is the first time anyone's ever asked me about that. Let me think about that before I get back to you. And we create a plan to start based on them not knowing, but the more I ask them and the more they think about it, those plans change over time, so their investments will change over time. There are charities that they care about. Change over time, how they want to give and how much they're able to give changes over time, so it's a never ending process that. We love to create a financial plan with all this information, but it's almost out of date by the time we give it to a client because the world changes and they change. And that's sort of the fun part of what I do, is helping clients define who they are and what their wealth can help them create and help them be. Yeah, for sure. You have a long term relationship with them for sure, because I know with our we've had a long term relationship with our financial investor. And you're right, things change.

    And so I'm going to ask the question about the pandemic and how you've managed to ease everybody's fears about what's been happening this year. And I think you have no problem doing that. It's been an interesting time. And here in the US, the market dropped huge amounts in March and then came right back.

    One of the things about what I do is that we are, by nature as humans, not rational. And my job is to help people make rational decisions in irrational times. I mean, I like to describe it sort of you know, I know people who have driven home drunk and made it perfectly safe, and I have known people who've driven hands on the steering wheel at 10 and two and drove in the speed limit and some friend accidents. Bad things happen if you do the right thing and good things happen if you do the wrong thing. More often than not, you do the right thing over and over again. You'll get better long term results and study after study says you can't time the markets. You can't. You know, figure out what it's going to be at the bottom and when it's going to be at the top, and the biggest thing for me to do for a lot of my clients as far as building their financial wealth is having them do what is very uncomfortable. At the right time, because it's logically is the right thing to do statistically, the right thing to do, no matter how bad it feels, every day, it seems that a client comes to me and says the market's going to fall apart. Let's sell out now. And I can tell you a couple of my biggest regret in the industry in my 20 something years is the couple of clients who sold out during the crash of 2008 who I told them, look, be patient. They sold out in 2009 generally. And those are the people who had a really hard time recovering. Those who rode through it were unhappy, but they built that wealth from there and it continues growing and you just can't determine what that is and when the bottom from the top saw and writing through proves to be the right answer. But also with covid, I have found that many of my clients have been more and more concerned about different causes when you're talking about charities earlier and things that they thought were important before, maybe it was their university or or something in their community, they're more they're giving has changed. And they might be giving more to food banks or they might be more worried about the homeless situation. Or they might be more worried about medical research and various things that can change in this world. I know a lot of people as they've seen their communities and the people they care about at the restaurants they go to or other causes, realize that social inequity is more of a cost that they care about as they see their friends who are professionals doing just fine through the pandemic. But then to the others who are struggling to begin with struggle even more so. So the causes they care about have changed through the pandemic. And it's been a very interesting time to work with people, revisit their plans, revisit their goals, both both on a financial and on a community level to relook at those those those items and try to keep them doing what is. The rational thing to do to and not let their emotions sweep them away, which is really easy to do right now, and I think that's also a matter of them trusting you. I think I think that your relationship is the most important part with with them. And, yeah, with this time, I know it's there are polls to to help others. So it's great that you can change their plans for them so quickly and, you know, get them if they're concerned, reassure them and all that kind of thing. I know we've had a few reassurances here, but. Yeah. And just just like the cheerful driver who gets in the car accidents, I won't always do what I recommend to clients, won't always work. They need to know that. But I'm going to do for them to know that they can trust me to do what looks to be the right thing. And if I keep on doing the right thing more often than not, over the long term will get the right results. And that trust is there to keep them calm and to help them keep that final going back to the ship analogy that keep them reminded their final destination and there might be a storm along the way, there might be winds and there might be calm periods where the sails won't work. But if they keep the long view on their destination will help them get there. Wow, that's a great analogy, and if I had that analogy with my financial investor, yes, they would be really reassuring me. Thank you much. All that's that's wonderful. You've given some great things to think about because I don't think anyone ever thought about values and trust and purpose and legacy and all this when when they're thinking about money. So I hope that you will be successful and continue and remind people that they need to have legacy planning. I think that's probably the first thing they think about when they talk to you anyway. So is this you always try to do that with them? Mitchell. Yeah, you know, I think, again, when waiting for practice about 10 years ago, we legacy planning our practices very generic 10 years ago and we sort of tried to be all things to all people. And I think where we are now is that we are great advisers for a select few who have these concerns. And I'm not the right person for a lot of people. And I don't try to be the right person for everybody. I really try to find people who have things that they care about. And I get referred to people who have lots of financial wealth but don't care about much anymore. And I generally tell them to go elsewhere. And I sympathize with less financial wealth, but really want to change the world. And that's what's important to me, is working with people that I can take my skill set and really make a huge difference to them and really to those they care about because they care about.

    Well, I'm so pleased that you came on today, Mitchell and that we could talk about purpose and value and legacy. I'm so pleased because sometimes it's one thing you don't think about with finances. And so I'd like to thank you for for coming on. And and I'll be putting up your information for anyone who's interested at the end of the call. So thank you, Mitchell. It's been great. Great. And you've made me hopeful, hopeful for my planning. I didn't even think about, you know what, I maybe I should actually put some of my will charities into my planning rather than just sticking them in my will. So thank you very much, Mitchell.

    Thank you. I always love talking about this with people. And even if they're not the right clients, sometimes it gets them started down a road. And I've gotten calls years later saying I've run into people at a social events. And, you know, I thought you were a little off when I first met you, but I thought about what you had to say. And I really get that. And one of the great things of giving now and sort of just in your will as you get to see a sea change made from you and you know, not everybody can afford to give immediately, but if you can give a little bit and see what change you can make, it's just so much nicer than knowing that all those changes we made after you're gone, which is still very important.

    Thank you, Mitchell. This has been finding your purpose TV. And thank you very much for coming on today. And I'll be showing information on how to contact you in a minute. Thank you, Mitchell.

    Thank you, Jane.

    For financial planning with thoughtful outcomes, because it's your legacy, you can contact Mitchell at Capital Intelligence Associates. For more on finding your purpose, go to https://finding your purposeTV. com and you can find us on Roku at finding your purpose as well. You can find us on YouTube. Look for finding your purpose. See you there.

  • Jane Welcome everybody. This is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose. And today I'm so excited because I'm talking to Chicke, Fitzgerald of Solutions Innovation, and her business is actually all about finding your purpose, when you're in business. And I want to thank you so much for taking the time, cause I know you're very busy, so thank you, Chicke, tell me a little bit more about, your business and, and how it all ties in to purpose. That's so exciting.

    Chicke Well, Jane, and thank you, first, thank you so much for having me on. And yeah, purpose has, has been at the core of my business for some time now. I spent the first third of my career, beginning back all the way to the late seventies, with the top travel technology companies in the world. And so, the first third of my career was in corporate life with the companies that actually created the foundational technology for booking travel online. So I worked for Sabre, which birthed Travelocity, I worked for Worldspan, which was the foundational technology for Expedia and Priceline and Orbitz, and then worked for one of the largest global telecommunications companies in the world. And then in the mid nineties, I went out on my own and formed a strategic consulting firm and so spent about 10 years doing consulting. And during that time I had a real awakening of what was really important and, and I was very, very good at what I did, in the consulting world, ran a multimillion dollar consulting firm, but at the end of the day, I didn't, I didn't have joy in what I was doing and, you know, for those who can see the wall behind me, I've set up my Zoom wall to really be able to tell my story. My head is covering it a little bit is, is across, which shows that my faith is at the foundation of everything that I do. And the book that I wrote several years ago called The Game Changer, is really the story, that tells what it's like to be a tech entrepreneur, but to really be looking for what will give you long-term purpose and joy. And it, it is a, an allegorical business novel. So it's not precisely my story, but one of the nice things about being an author is that you get to tell your story as a part of the story that you tell in your book. So, Jane, what has ended up happening is after that third of my career that was focused on strategic consulting, I ended up realizing I wanted to actually build a business where I could not only make money while I slept was kind of the business premise, but also that I could give back in a really meaningful way. And we can talk about that a little bit more, but my tech company is Solutions Innovations, and we have built a game-changing technology that builds on all of that history that I've got in the travel industry.

    Jane Oh, wow. I didn't realize just how, yeah, how amazing you are, because that's just amazing that you're in that technology, because that was so innovative when you were working with it, the price line and everything that it is an amazing technology. Yeah. And now you've decided you want to help businesses with, finding what their purpose is. Is that, is that correct or ?

    Chicke Well, what we do is we give them, through our product, we actually give them a way to raise money for the causes that they care about. So our target clients are companies like CRM companies, calendaring companies, ticketing, and registration, events platforms, where we actually plug in our trip planning tool into their product. And then we give 10% of our revenues back to their charity of choice. So we give them a way to give back to their communities that they serve. And if our client is a nonprofit, we actually donate 25% of our revenue back to the charity.

    Jane Oh, wow. That's wonderful. you were saying though, that you're also starting to focus more on individuals with your game changer or what's your game changer community all about?

    Chicke Well, the game changer community has actually existed for, almost a decade. It began as a, very, narrow group called the executive girlfriends group, which was all executive women. And we've had that community for 10 years. It's where my radio shows started because we would have our weekly meeting and I would invite an author or an expert to be on the show. And the individuals that joined us, were generally part of the C-suite right within, within a company, or they had started their own companies. So many were solopreneurs and entrepreneurs. And so that community has always been about bringing together people who shared a desire to change the game. Right. So innovation at the core and not just technical innovation, but like I said, business model innovation, because what we're doing with our traveling to give product within solutions innovations has more to do with giving than it does with booking travel. But the context of, of what generates that giving is the booking of travel. So, the community was formed. I said 10 years ago, and it has now blossomed beyond just women, to also include men. And again, we've got everybody from corporate executives and CEOs, down to people who are coaches and authors and people who are solopreneurs and entrepreneurs. So, they joined as individuals very much like you would join a Facebook group or a LinkedIn group, but it is a much more engaged group. It's a much more focused group. And it, I think of it more like a round table than a podium where I am out talking to you about what I care about. Right. So allowing you to talk to one another.

    Jane Wow. That's wonderful. I just, before I forget, cause I forgot to ask you, what do you do your radio show now still, or, yeah. And what's the, what's the name of the radio show I should be listening. It's called the game changer. And is it on iTunes or is it on a special network or?

    Chicke It's on all of them All of the popular, show channels my primary distribution is through the C-suite radio network and, C-suite is a group that was started by Jeffrey Hayzlett, who used to be the COO of Kodak. And, I joined the hero club, which is a subset of, of, the C-suite network about a year and a half ago. And they're also a client of traveling to give. So when, when we were having face-to-face meetings before COVID, they would use our product for the attendees to get to their meetings.

    Jane Oh wow. That's great. You're very, very busy lady. so I'm gonna put up the offer now and if you could just speak about, I think you've already spoken about exactly, you know, what the game changer is all about, but if you could just maybe mention, how, how we join, you know, who do we have to be to join the game changer network that would be great. Thanks.

    Chicke It, well, I think I'm going to start with the book because the book is, again, it's a, a business parable and for those of you who are a bit burned out on self-help books and on business books, this is a really great alternative because it tells a story of the individuals that are a part of a company. And it tells it in the context of, at the end of a meeting that they have offsite. And we've all had those offsite meetings that we think are going to change the world, right The company's going to miraculously turn around, but, but what ends up happening in this book is the people who attend that meeting that doesn't go well, that doesn't, you know, lay the groundwork for changing the world. They all scatter and go or back to the office or out for dinner with friends, but on the way to where they're going, they listen to one of my radio shows. So it features people like Bob Burg who wrote, the go giver and a Catarina Walter who wrote. And so within the context of the book, it tells that story and it shows you that every single person needs something different to transform their company. So if you were wanting to become purpose driven, you will find one story perhaps that resonates with you on, on the game-changer books. So the offer that you put up, the book is available on Amazon, just search for the game changer and Chicke Fitzgerald. I'm assuming that you'll put a link that they can get and joining the game changer community, what I would suggest, and you've got up on the screen right now, my personal website, Chickefitzgerald.com And it, all of my, electronic presence, they all lead you to the same place. So whether you, whether you come in, because you remember my name, Chicke Fitzgerald, and go to Chickefitzgerald.com, or you go to the game changer network, which is the site for my radio shows. It will take you in and help you figure out how to join the community. And, again, I believe on your, your offer page, you've got the direct link in to join the community. And really anyone is welcome. You will be asked a couple of questions when you join the community of why do you want to be there. How do you feel like you can contribute. This is not a place to come and broadcast your offers. I mean, we get plenty of that all day long on LinkedIn. This is a place to actually get to know people discuss and to be able to really move up that engagement ladder of really building trust with people. So that if you do have an offer, if you do have something that you want to share with people that they'll listen to you, right, and that you aren't just spamming them with offers that they don't care about. Because again, I think we've all been so inundated with that. So we welcome anyone who, who feels like they do want to change their game, or they are a game changer to become a part of that community. And, again, you'll find your place. There are many different ways that you can participate. we still do have the executive girlfriends group we meet every Monday afternoon. So, again, coming into Chickefitzgerald.com guides you to everything that we're doing and the tool that we use within that website to show you all the different things you can learn is actually a product of our company.

    Jane Oh, wow. Yeah. Wait, we get to try it out at the same time, that's wonderful. To think about that, because I know on LinkedIn is so hard to, to have real relationships. Yes. You have to try hard for that. And, I think going to wrap up by you celebrating about finding joy and in what you do cause I think that's what you're all about.

    Chicke Well, at the end of the day, what I realized is that even though I was a gifted consultant and able to do very, very well financially at the end of the day, if you don't find joy in what you do, it's time to take a step back and figure out what it is that you want to do. And taking that step back, I realized that my true gift is in my ability to solve problems. And the name of my company Solutions is all about being able to see both the problem and the solution in the same frame. So, I take great joy in helping others find their purpose. you know, I, I do a lot of one-on-one coaching and mentoring. I still do consulting, but on a very, very limited basis, I have to really be convinced that the cause is a good one and that it resonates with me. And, again, I've got a number of companies that I'm either a member of their board or their advisory board. So, very interested in helping other entrepreneurs. So that's how I get my joy. And then of course, building products that, that really changed the game, particularly in the travel industry where I spent my entire adult life, that gives me incredible joy. And so I'm excited about rolling out our traveling to give product.

    Jane Oh. So it's not rolled out yet then are, the traveling to give or you've been using it. So what do you, what do you mean rolling out You mean for a company Is that what you mean.

    Chicke No, the product is actually a mature product, but we have been taking a bit of a pause because of COVID because our product relies on a healthy travel and events business.

    Jane Yeah. Yeah. Actually I, I, took down my, travel website, celebrating travel test for now. Yeah. So that's, that's great. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Okay. Well, thank you so much, Chicke. It sounds like you're very busy person. I'm finding that a lot of people, the way that they are are getting out there is, is advisory boards and you know, volunteering for that kind of thing. So, yeah, that's one way you can certainly, help help your community is, is with that kind of thing. So thank you very much, Chicke, for taking the time.

    Chicke You're welcome,

    Jane. Thank you. Great day. Bye-bye

  • Jane Welcome everybody. This is Jane Gardner of finding your purpose TV, and today on spotlight, where we talk to purpose-driven entrepreneurs, we have Mary Leone of diversity outreach partners, and Mary is a talent acquisition leader with a passion for diversity recruiting. And that includes people with disabilities and veterans. So, Mary, I think I'll let you talk more about the business and how you were doing that. And as I have a personal interest in finding out what your journey was and getting to where you are now.

    Mary Thank you for having me on Jane. I appreciate it. I'm looking forward to this. So to tell you a little bit about my journey, back at the end of last year, I had made a decision that I wanted to find my and follow my passion. So my passion is diversity recruiting, and that includes people with disabilities as well as transitioning veterans. And what I did is I ended up leaving my company in March, right before COVID not realizing that was going to happen. I was introduced through my networking efforts to my business partner, Alan Chapman and we formed diversity outreach partners this summer. And so we're really excited. Diversity outreach partners helps companies build bridges. So for a lot of companies that do affirmative action plans, and these could be government contractors, or they could be subcontractors. A lot of times they do their affirmative action plan and they literally, they put it on the shelf and they don't look at it again until the next year. And so what we can do is we can help them with our outreach efforts and when they have gaps in their affirmative action plan for females, for people with disabilities, for veterans or minorities, we can actually actually help them build the bridge to organizations that can help them with closing those gaps. And so we can be that outreach partner and we can help them with, improving that candidate flow as well as developing those relationships with the diversity organizations. So we're pretty excited.

    Jane I'm very interested in how you got to where you are today, because when you went to university, I'm sure you didn't think you'd be doing this, that you're doing now.

    Mary That is a really great question. And, and that is completely true. in my last role, when I was looking for my next position, I actually got an offer from Texas instruments that I couldn't refuse, and I was offered to help them rebuild their compliance program. And at that time that was back in 2013. And, at that time they, the government was introducing some new regulations and that included a focus on people with disabilities, as well as transitioning veterans. And so those two things just, I just really fell in love with those two areas, the diversity recruiting front, I was able to help the talent acquisition or, organization. one of the things that Texas instruments does is they do quite a bit of external hiring at the campus level. And so I actually put together a very large, effort to reach out to the, the various target schools to find who are the, who are the, organizations and who are the schools that are doing the best job on the students with disabilities, as well as student veterans. And then I put together a heat map. I came up with a strategy and we started implementing. And so I just kind of fell in love with those two areas. And I knew I wanted to do diversity recruiting. And so I made the decision to, to leave the company and to, set off on my own journey. I was really looking for a large company to work for that was either focused on growing or building their program that included veterans or people with disabilities. And then I fell into this opportunity. I networked and I met my business partner, Alan, and we decided to start diversity outreach partners. So it's kind of exciting. I actually volunteer with two other organizations. One's very disability focused and one is veterans focused. And so that has helped me with, learning best practices as well. Mary I, I actually have, I'm , I have a couple of different roles in veterans organization as called Vets. The number two, and then industry and the founder actually had put it together about a year ago. We actually have overwhelmed over 20,000 followers on LinkedIn already. There's well over a hundred volunteers, in the organization as well. And every three weeks we have a networking event. And what that does is it gives the transitioning veterans an opportunity to practice networking in a safe space. There's always a high level transitioned, military person, war veteran service organization leader, to be able to share some key messages and learnings from their journey. And then what we do is we break into networking rooms and I'm one of the networking facilitators. We actually had our first military spouse event yesterday. So the, the organization isn't just focused on transitioning veterans, it also helps military spouse. It helps gold star families and it helps, other advocates as well. And so it's a great, great organization. I've met some wonderful people and, it, it really has helped me on my journey and I've, I've learned so much about, coaching people one-on-one to be able to help them achieve what they want and find their next job after they've transitioned from the military. So it's fun. I do a lot of one-on-one coaching as well through that effort.

    Jane could you repeat the name of the, the veterans Is it just LinkedIn, maybe just spell it out for us just in case anyone's listening in I'm sure. Yeah. That would be great. And getting what they need, the help.

    Mary Yep. It's vets V E T S the letter TWO. And then in this industry.

    Jane Oh, awesome. Mary It's on LinkedIn.

    Mary Yep. It's on LinkedIn and, it's, it actually is a webpage as well. And so you can go in and there are actually 40, if you can believe this 45,000 veterans service organizations that are there to help transitioning veterans. And, this organization is put together so that it can library or catalog all 45,000 of them are free for people. So think of it as a resource page, but then, another benefit is the networking meetings that we have every three weeks. And we have, we're expecting over 500 people to register for the one that comes up on Saturday. So it's a pretty big, pretty, pretty big deal and a pretty big effort. We've really touched a lot of people. Jane

    Jane Wow. That's great. Yeah. So, so, so what do you do, for the actually for the companies in your business you're, you're looking at obviously starting to do that and, and what do you do for them in terms of, I mean, obviously, you know, lots of veterans because you volunteer quite a bit, so

    Mary Yeah. Yeah. so it's, it's actually more of building bridges with organizations. So it's allowing that it's first of all, doing a consultation with a company to understand what are their gaps. So do they have gaps on the female side Do they have gaps for minorities. Do they have gaps for people with disabilities or veterans. And then based on that consultation and that analysis, what we do is we look at the organizations that we've already, we've already started establishing relationships with either on a national or regional or a local level. And we do introductions. We put together a plan on what makes sense for the company. So maybe they have engineers, maybe they have machine operators, maybe they have, nurses, whatever it is. We can look at our organizations and if we don't have any, then we can find new ones so that we can build those relationships for the company so that they can close those gaps. Because at this point, everybody is wanting to increase their diversity and, affirmative action. Actually, if you're, if you're following the affirmative action rules, this is one of the requirements is you need to do those outreach efforts to organizations. And if you don't get the results that you want to close those gaps, then you actually have to do new efforts. And next year you can't just do the same things year after year and not make any changes.

    Jane Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. So you, you obviously, you have some experience with veterans and, you'd like to maybe talk about veterans in transition. you've already mentioned you work with, a networking organization, so, so what else do you do.

    Mary Yep. I've actually reached out to several different veterans organizations, but the one that I volunteer the most and it's, you know, it's probably at least five to 10 hours a week with that's that's to industry. and, and what I, what I do on the side after I meet people at the networking events is I offer to meet with them and I do one-on-one coaching. So if somebody is in transition, maybe they're six months away from leaving the military, maybe they're 12 months and they want to try and get a handle on, target companies. They have some questions about how to interview. They have some questions about what is this type of role. Do, do you have any connections that you can introduce me to, to do an informational interview And I'm able to be able, I'm able to provide some of that information just because I've, I've done this so much in terms of coaching people through that, but I've, I've also made a lot of contacts. And so it's, it's, it's fun. I really enjoy it. And it's very fulfilling and I get a lot out of the coaching sessions as well.

    Jane Wow. Yeah. And you were mentioning that you also, wanted to talk about, disability employment and, and, and definitely, you know, how we should be employing more sure.

    Yeah. Mary Yep. So one of the organizations that I also volunteer with and I'm the vice chair is called disability in North Texas. And the national organization is called disability in and is three-pronged. first it encourages employers to employ and build programs that employ people with disabilities. It also has a vendor component where they have a certification program for disability owned business enterprises. And then it also has kind of a marketing component as well. The focus that we have for disability in North Texas, which is based in the Dallas Fort worth area, is to encourage more employers to, build and grow their programs, employing people with disabilities. So on a regular basis, at least once a quarter, if not more frequently, we have panelists, we have speakers, we have share best practices. We do networking. We have tours all to encourage people to share how have they been successful and what else can they do And what else can they implement Cause a lot of times, the effort for employing people with disabilities is farther behind than the veterans effort is. And so we can learn a lot of lessons from them. And so what I often tell people is you need to, you need to start someplace, so maybe you don't know where to start. Well, don't start with, you know, a list of 12 things start someplace and then build upon those successes.

    Jane Oh, awesome. Yeah. And you were saying that, you're, you must have a lot of experience, you know, with your volunteering on and you can help veterans. and you've been mentioning about advisory boards. I don't know how many you're on, but it sounds like you're on a few. How do you find that as a benefit to, doing your journey on it

    Mary It's, it's a way to learn more about the community. And I found the veterans community as well as the disability community to be very welcoming. And so I'm meeting more people who are in veteran service organizations that are oftentimes offering free services, either free resume reviews, free interviewing skills, training, free networking, different things like that. And so all sorts of opportunities for me to learn more about the organizations that can help the populations that I serve.

    Jane Oh, wow. That's awesome. I'm sure you have the time sounds like yeah, you must. You're very experienced. I'm sure. In seeing them at the moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, what, we're going to talk about, what you're offering, to organizations. So if you don't mind, I'll just put it up for a few minutes while you speak on it and I'll be a bit rude that way, but if you could just speak on it, that'd be great.

    Sure. Mary So one of the things that we found with companies is, again, they, they do their affirmative action plans and they put them on the shelf. They don't do anything with them afterwards. And part of the regulations that the OFCCP enforces as they want you to do outreach. So if you have gaps and again, it couldn't be in females, it could be minorities. It could be with veterans, or it could be with people with disabilities, you need to do outreach to diversity organizations. And so what you can do is you can come to us as diversity outreach partners, and we can help you build those bridges to the organizations. So the offer that we're, we're sharing with you today on a limited time is to have a free consultation to start that process. And if you like that process after a month, then you can sign up with us. If you've decided you want to just pursue it on your own, then you, you know, you can have the, the free consultation for the first month and then you can go, we can go our separate ways, but we'd like to be able to introduce you to our services, because again, it's for the fraction of the cost of a person, you can actually have us be your right hand of your HR organization and you can, you can use our expertise and the network that we've built of organizations to help you with that diversity outreach.

    Jane Well, yeah, I mean, just from, from speaking today, I can see that you must have the connections with the veterans, you know, just from your networking and volunteering, that it would be easy for you to help anyone with their, their recruiting and hiring. Yeah.

    Mary And it is actually well beyond the veterans. We do have a With organizations, both minority organizations, female organizations, as well as disability organizations.

    Jane That's great. Right. Yeah. You're right. Sorry. I know that's how I remember now, but yeah, I know that there is an incentive down in the United States to do that. So that's awesome that you can do that now. Yeah. So anyway, so thank you very much. Mary, I want to, just to thank you very much for, for coming on and being on spotlights.

    Mary Well, thank you. And do you have any additional questions I've really enjoyed the conversation,

    Jane Yeah, no. I mean, I, I think, I think you probably know all the organizations from what I can tell for veterans, and I hope that a veteran that's listening well, well, of course, you know, contact you and can certainly contact you regardless of this, you know, the, your business, because of course you volunteer for a lot of groups that may be, and you do, you, do, you do coaching still then. And you're planning to coach all the minorities and with all the consultations.

    Mary I really enjoy it. And I find that that's a passion area for me. So I'm going to continue with that effort. And, I do have quite a few people who regularly refer people over, who are either in job transition people with disabilities or veterans of those areas.

    Jane Oh, awesome. Well, thank you. Thank you very much. I enjoyed our, I've enjoyed our discussion. Thanks. The veterans organizations down in United States are great and it's great that you're volunteering for those as well. That's cause you obviously enjoy it very much.

    Mary I do. I do. It's a passion area for me.

    Jane Oh, okay. Great. Thanks Mary.

    Mary Thank you, Jane right

    Jane Companies that are interested in a diversity outreach plan to expand their outreach for affirmative action plans, including one month of free service of, for initial consultation, outreach plan, design and implementation. You can email mary at [email protected].

  • Welcome everybody. This is Jane Gardner at Finding Your purpose. And today we're going to be spotlighting on purpose driven entrepreneur. And today on today's show, we're going to be spotlighting Tanya Schechter. I think that's going to be my, it's going to be my, what do you call it thing The lady who doesn't know how to pronounce people's names, talking to us here, about relationship-based leadership. And first off, Tanya, before we talk about your business, I'd love to find out how you actually got into that business, because that can really be interesting to find out what your, how you realized your purpose and how you got into your business. And that would be great if you could speak.

    Tanya Thanks, Jane. And I'm so, yeah, I'm so glad to be here. it's a really interesting question. I had a background as a training and performance consultant for over 20 years, and I've worked in tons and tons of big organizations and small organizations, public sector, private sector, doing consulting coaching. And I started noticing how there was often a lot of conflict and a lot of misery around employees and that, that was resulting in a lot of underperformance. And so what I really started looking at was how leadership made the difference, and they really good leaders could take a situation that was really negative, where there was a lot of toxicity and they could turn it around and rally a team together to get results. Whereas leaders that were ineffective would do the opposite. They would just exacerbate the tensions and the conflicts and the, and the disease that was going on.

    Jane Awesome. You know, I don't know where you are working, but in my previous life, I was a drafter working in an engineering company. And in fact, I'm married an engineer, so they were, they are not very disciplined, very fun. And let's just say they're fairly dysfunctional companies. And so I certainly know what you're talking about. So, what, what did, did you find that you found to be the solution for, these issues that happen now What, with, all the sexual harassment that's happened in the last few years and everything yet, you must, there must be a lot of demand for leadership training,

    Tanya And so what we found is that it's really all about relationships starting with the relationship that we have with ourselves, and then the relationship That we have with others, and then looking at our relationships impact on the greater world. And when we, as leaders can stay in integrity and stay in relationship, it becomes a lot easier to navigate conflicts and navigate, challenges so that we come out on the other side, using the conflict as a way to actually strengthen our own relationships and our teams and the outcomes. So it becomes an opportunity versus a hurdle.

    Jane Oh, so do, do you find that they like being told, I mean, they must be aware that there's conflict, but I mean, most people don't want to talk about conflict. So what do you, how do you work through that process in terms of, identifying, well, they may identify it, but

    Tanya There's a bunch of different things. The first thing is whether you want to talk about conflict or you don't want to talk about conflict conflicts happening, right And so the conflict is either addressed or not addressed. And people either, you know, we'll try and smooth it over or tuck it under the rug, but the conflict is still there. It's not being resolved. So one of the first things that we do is we start working with people to identify their own innate responses to conflict. 'Cause everybody has a go to place. Some people are runners, some people are avoiders, some people are like, okay, bring it on. Right. Let's talk about it. Right. And, but that often can turn into more of a fight or a confrontation versus a true communication collaboration to find a new solution. So first we get people to start thinking about what their default responses are and the impact of those default responses. And then we start getting them to work on where they might see the opportunity and starting to kind of what we talk about it is moving the needle and that there's a range of different responses. And then we start giving them tools and techniques to choose a different response.

    Jane Oh, no. That's that sounds about that sounds. That sounds good for sure. can you, can you tell us a little bit about, the HTI Institute and, and how that, wraps all together into your, your business, ideas and principles and things

    Tanya Sure. So HTI stands for hearts together inspire, and that's what we truly believe is that when two people are connected and in alignment and alignment, doesn't have to be totally agreement that there's more possibility for moving forward. And so we developed a relationship map that we use to help guide people on how to start working with conflict and how to start managing obstacles that they come up with so that they can stay in relationship and then move forward, stronger together. the map really came out because my, my coauthor, Matthew Gould and myself were very different in dealing with. And we started noticing that if we were each sticking to our default patterns, we weren't going to get anywhere. And so we needed to find a new way if we were going to work together.

    Jane Oh, wow. So, yeah. So let's talk about your book, from the heart. Yeah. Leadership, no leader from the lead, from your heart, the art of relationship based leadership. Yeah. How did that happen Was that before or after you started working this process.

    Tanya It was after what we started realizing is that this map that we have, it's a tool and yet it actually was, there was enough material in there to talk about that. We, we really felt that we needed to write a book and a book that would have illustrations in terms of stories that we included of ourselves, both personal and work things that we came across in our work lives that we had had as true life experiences, where we saw that there were rapid changes either from conflict that had been managed well or not managed well, and the impacts of it. And even when we didn't manage conflict conflict well, and then, what we truly believe is that, you know, people have, they need to understand things conceptually, but understanding something, conceptually isn't enough to change. What's in your toolbox. It's just creating an awareness that there's something else there. And what people really need is to start then having the, the opportunities to practice and break down the concepts into manageable tools that they can apply. So after we explain the concepts and use stories to illustrate the different ways that they can, the concepts can look like we also create almost like a workbook at the end of every chapter. There's a set of exercises that people can go and do and work with their families at home. They can work them at work and really start to see what changes. And is it positive, negative Is this something that they want to keep doing or not. Jane Yeah. I thought I'd show the photo of the book. And you could mention, that you've and mentioning that actually it's also good for personal relationships as well as business. How would you, you just mentioned that you would use some of the exercises in there then.

    Tanya Oh, you can use almost every exercise in there for work and for personal. Yeah. And part of it is starting to get in right. Relationship with self. Right. Cause we believe that every, every leadership action starts with being in right relationship, starting with being in proper relationship with yourself. And when we're in right relationship with ourself ourselves, we're often clear on what our values are. We're acting in an, in alignment with our values and using our values as a source to really, drive our decision making.

    Jane Yeah. Yeah. I totally agree. I feel that if yeah, you have to be self otherwise you won't get anywhere. Well, you can just wander through your life. Yeah. So yeah, I found that I'm becoming a bit more aware of myself, helped me with my relationship with my husband for sure. And so I certainly appreciate that kind of awareness. What for you made a big difference it's just, being, just finding out that yes, it was okay to be me who I am because, you know, being as someone who's fairly quiet and shy and withdrawn you, as you can imagine, it's, it's difficult for me to do public speaking and stuff like that. So, so this is sort of my armor. Right. You know And, and, yeah, and realizing, well my husband and I worked together, he's an engineer and I do the administration and just realizing that, you know, he's, he's an engineer and I'm the administrator and, you know, he's, it's his business and, not to interfere cause I tend to like to help people out and, it can get me into trouble. So it's great. I'm going to have to get your book for sure. Yeah. I'd love to be back once. You've read it. Yeah. That's, that's a great book. Yeah. So I was wondering how you could tell us how you were mentioning that you can, you see conflict as an opportunity. So wonder if you could speak a bit about that a little,

    Tanya Well, conflict is everywhere, right And often in society it becomes like ignore the conflict or you have to polarize it's my way or your way. And what we see is that when there's a problem, leadership means looking at the problem together. It's not about blaming, right. It's first of all, taking ownership of whatever's going on and then using it as an opportunity to move forward. And so if there's a conflict, instead of just exploring the two perspectives, the first thing to be would be, well, let me explain my perspective or let you explain your perspective so that each of us can truly understand the other perspective. And yet let's go beyond that. We've got an issue, we've got something going on. What's our objective, where do we want to go And what other perspectives could we adopt And what other options can we look at to start finding a solution that's more in alignment with what our bigger vision is other than being right.

    Jane Oh, Oh, I see. Yeah, that, that would certainly that could, you know, even change the direction of a company. I would think couldn't it because if you listen to everybody, instead of just the leader that that would really, I think help totally. They have lots of ideas. I'm sure the people who work there as well as the leader. Oh, that's, that's great. Now the hard one is how to lead from your heart. how do you feel that, how, what, what does that mean to you How to lead from your heart,

    Tanya Really leading from the heart is staying in alignment with your values and respecting other people's values, looking for commonality and really, putting the relationship first. I mean, if we're out of alignment and out of integrity with ourselves, we can't be effective leaders. And it's the same thing. If we're in relationship and we're having a negative impact on somebody else, we can't be effective leaders. If we're damaging the relationship itself, we can't be effective leaders. And even if we're fine in our, in our relationship, if we're negatively having an impact on the outer world, again, we're not effective leaders. And so it's really about the relationship, keeping the relationship front and center and thinking about how important it is and where we want to hold that relationship's important. Right. Is it more important than the bottom line or is the bottom line more important Which, which is it and if the relationship is more important, most of the time, the bottom line will, Right.

    Oh, awesome. That's a great takeaway. I think if I was to say that a relationship is more important than, you know, the bottom line and it will actually help the bottom line. That's a great, great way to think of working.

    Tanya One of the examples that we use in our book is about Starbucks. And I think it's, it's such a great example of it, you know, in 2008, when, you know, when everything was tanking from the financial crisis and Starbucks stock was down to seven bucks and you know, how Harold Schultz had been booted out and everybody's like, Oh yeah, Starbucks is going to tank, that's it for them, you know And then they called him back and he realized, you know, there's no way, like we don't have enough money. The stores aren't doing well, we're not in line with our values. We're not creating that sense of community that we set out to do. Our employees aren't being treated well. And so he hired a bunch of consultants and they said, well, you know, obviously the way out is just to remove health benefits. And he just looked at them and said, get out. Right. And he Sure to give everybody the, the keep and keep benefits thread, the whole financial crisis, everybody and their extended families, even part time workers got benefits. He made sure to like reestablish the quality of the coffee, cause it had really gone down. So he would do things like shut down, stores to retrain everybody on how to make a proper cup of coffee stopped, you know, letting the coffee sit around and really change the environment so that it could create a community that he wanted. Right. That was the real in inline with the values of Starbucks. And we've seen that again and again, the years, you know, when there's been a race relations problem, they've shut down the stores, which costs them millions and millions of dollars to do, just to train everybody. Right. They'll pay for their, their employees, to go back to school. Retrain. So, In my mind, all of that, it's like looking at what's the relationship, both with the employees, what's the impact on the outer world, what's the impact with the customers. Right. And what goes on within the stores, it's all really, really important. And by holding that they're extremely, extremely proud.

    Jane Right Yeah. Yeah. And I actually, I just, and we could almost just continue on and what, with the pandemic, I mean, I think Starbucks is also is a, is a fore runner of doing radical things. I believe what, well, what do you feel about the pandemic I think it's a good time for leadership to be, you know, to be changed.

    Tanya The pandemic, you know, at first people were talking about it being a pause and I just kept saying, no, it's not a pause. It's a reset. And in a way it's almost crystallized everything. That's not working. Right. Like all these like divisions have been exacerbated. If we look at the politics and we look at the economy and where people are sitting and it's becoming no longer tolerable for almost anyone. And so now there's almost like a crack in a shift and it's like, what is the importance. Is it the environment. Is it having humans having more equality and everybody having a baseline level of economic success. You know, what is the most important. And I think these things are all in question right now and it's becoming clear that relationships and people matter.

    Jane Awesome. Well, that's, that's awesome. Tanya, I'm just, I'm just blown away. And I wanted to show that your book again, as well as your information for everybody, because I'm going to be buying your book for sure. Is it, is it this year It came out in 2020.

    It did. It came out in May and it's available on Amazon. We recently released the audio book on audible and then there's, there's eBooks available like on Kindle and through the bookstore. Jane Yeah. Yeah. I see Barnes and noble has it as well and yeah, that's, that's great. Yeah. And under $20, so yeah, that's important these days. Totally. Well, thank you,

    Tanya. thank you for this. talking about, your, your business, and leadership, because I think it's really important in these times and I wanted to thank you for taking the time today, to come in and talk about, being driven and your business. Yeah.

    Tanya That's been a great, great conversation. So nice to talk about. Well, I love talking about leadership, so yeah. Okay.

    Thanks a lot, Tanya,

    For more on relationship based leadership, go to Amazon and church for lead from your heart.

  • this is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose TV we don't need that some going to take it out because I trust my camp your credit of all welcome welcome you're on TV and I wouldn't be talking to you about credibility why you well

    I'm all about credibility because this is what makes the world go around so anyway this is part of finding your purpose once you find your purpose you will be seen as credible as you be self intentional in what you do will be self-aware of why you do what you do and people understand who you are and know and like and trust you see was credible because your consistent in what you do.

    so let's go and talk about credibility again and today it's actually all the basics about credibility and I hope you understand this to find a way probably have to find a way on the website to have a frequently asked questions so you can contact me if you have any questions on this.

    So anyway today were going to be talking about credibility credibility what is it what is it mean to you who has credibility who lacks credibility so what was important why should we care about credibility.

    Well today I'm going to be talking about in this discussion why it is important that you are aware of what credibility is and how it affects your relationships with others how it affects you and the other person in terms of credibility as well credibility is fundamental and foundational for effective leadership and teambuilding in any office it's foundational for relationship development with others if you're doing a job search and selection you have to be seen as credible as well as if you're coaching and teaching you have to be effective and credible person and customer service of course to be in the awesome customer service you have to have credibility and of course in order to do sales you as the sales person has to have credibility otherwise the other person will buy so these are just some of the simple ways that you need to have credibility so let's have a look at what happened here I can something happen here with my slide sorry about that and it's my most important slide so we are going to do that slide it can so I'm not going to stop I'm going to show you what I do I keep going so I am going to do another screen capture and asked myself why this slide move because this is the most important slide open up to you and say credibility is the a level of respect others think about you so well we will start that discussion about what just happened whether you find me credible but yes I respect you and hopefully you respect me because I kept on going so here we go see if it happens again yes it's happened again for some reason my slides have moved up and down during darn now what's going to happen here for some reason I had a slide that wasn't correct so don't stop will talk about credibility and we do this again so there's my studio background and I'm going to be adding another screen capture all of the slide because the slide move down next time check your slides again before you start to make sure they're all the same as credibly credibility goes up so does others willingness to believe what you believe value what you value support your plans help you achieve your goals be honest with you and trust you it's the old no like and trust you credibility very important and any relationships so what makes credibility increase and decrease behaviour basically behaviour because that's all we can see about a person anyway is your behaviour what we see as being appropriate from the other person's perspective not yours to time tats people and situation makes her credibility increase behaviour perceived as being inappropriate for the same factors makes it decrease so credibility has three levels there's yourself your reality is based on your own beliefs whether good or bad and so you can have credibility with you in terms of your reality and who you are will give a little sample later but others the secret to understanding your customers is understanding that they are perceiving who you are from your behaviour and your credibility so then we have organizations they can also have credibility in terms of the organization on how they present themselves I of course should've had some long logos of more well-known companies than mine but this is my bio which is my open bio in terms of who I am where I live who I work with is my husband what I do what I love so I like to think by sharing this file rather than some boring written out text document you enjoy looking at what I enjoyed to do and I have more credibility as a human being and as Americanization I guess because I'm the only one in this organization so delivering developing credibility behaviour examples that build credibility well we could go through them one by one but I think you all understand that honesty helps to develop credibility devotion punctuality being good example for others ethical behaviour taking responsibility for your behaviour when you make mistakes keeping promises forgiving and understanding on other people make mistakes getting involved with the community with your with others volunteering focusing on the positive these are all things that develop your credibility and these are all behaviour so the point to this is your behaviour is what develops your credibility course here are some of the things that can destroy your credibility dishonesty lack of devotion no concern for time setting a bad example on ethical behaviour breaking promises denying responsibility for behaviour being unforgiving not getting involved with others focusing on the negative these are all things that can reduce your credibility credibility and the qualities of credibility from the book by James Ghose and Barry Posner how leaders gain and lose it and why people demand it it's a whole book on credibility and they did a studies and surveys of thousands of organizations of the employees of course in terms of asking them what they felt were credible qualities for a leader and these were the four highest traits of a good credible leader honesty being competent being forward-looking and inspiring inspiring others to do what they need to do as well as being forward-looking looking to the future these are the kind of qualities that make a leader credible feel free to go and look at the book to read more about credibility in the situation your greatest strengths can become your greatest limitations for example who likes to control your business your meetings in your personal life share how you make decisions or listen to other people and their opinions well how much credibility to this leader have with this team not much because they are not be willing to be part of the community and listen to others and it reduces her credibility so what can you do to improve your credibility well one thing that I could've done of course is to check my slides before I started but we are going to be have ongoing discussions on credibility because it's a very important topic because it's all about really knowing who you are and knowing you other people's are and being able to find your purpose so you act with purpose and you understand who you are and you can communicate who you are your qualities to others so that you are seen as credible because of the consistency in how you behave this is going to be quite a discussion on credibility here and finding your purpose TV and anyone who likes to have a discussion with me on camera is welcome to come and share their wisdom as well so hopefully will have a few people coming to discuss credibility and being a leader ask I do have a leadership leadership show so I could go out and get some people who believe being a leader and discuss what traits they think a leader needs to have but today this is all about credibility so let's go and finish so so thank you for listening

  • This is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose to the TV today going to be talking about credibility and some of the ways that you can be seen as an expert so we are going to talk about that right about now so let's get our presentation up so how we can improve that you're an expert in your field how I got him increase your credibility have consistent credibility in your business while here's some 21 ideas to be seen as the expert so this try the first one what's the first one on the first one is create a Facebook page become a part of your fans every day life so they see you in the feed answer simple customer service questions build confidence in you for potential customers then you could also course do the same thing on your website you could also create a frequently asked question section on your website and demonstrate your expertise by answering some of the simple questions that seem to come up every day with your business services or product and deal with them and in terms of having them there as frequently asked questions he can be seen as the X expert and reassure your customers that you know what they need you can also provide contact information on your website prove your will person make sure all your income information can be verified avoid using PO Box numbers provide a phone number and sky panel at work and provide more than one way to contact you and of course have your email there on your website as well as on your web page on Facebook I did number four you can use strong branding so to let people easily recognize you as being who you are use repetitive elements to solidify your brand when you're posting in the newsfeed on Facebook on your website so it's good to have the same colours so people recognize who you are you can be professional always focus on your client or customer pay attention to details always look for a way to take things one step further express yourself coherently on your website make sure everyone knows what you stand for and stand again what you are willing to do what you're not willing to do give yourself the mom test which your mom approve of what you're saying on your website or Facebook page or your other social media would your mom recognize your voice in your website content are you using language that very summer to who you are because it's no good once you start getting out there and showing your face to have not have a consistent look and feel sound to your website and not have the same everywhere else you fill on your social media so with equal speech using one promoting products and choosing JV partners always make sure that you are enthusiastic about whatever you might promote and make sure that you're happy with the service that people get with the JV partners that you might pursue answer your customers and clients questions authoritatively and helpful is the best way to show your expertise and use targeted press releases paid to position your news release and major news services media services like PRNewswire can wire can reach your target market while guarding global reach it's about time for me to send out a press release about finding your purpose TV which I haven't done yet so this is a great reminder number 10 is gather recommendations from industry peers and fellow experts and make sure the endorsement is relevant to your audience they're not going to care if your doctor likes what you do I did number 11 give samples it can be a trial sample or can be free samples are a light version of your product or they can try it out for a week or two your sample should leave people wanting to buy more or to actually buy your product invest in quality every part of your business should project professionalism and quality you should have a very sound-based guarantee in terms of whether or not your customers are happy hundred percent back hundred percent quality guaranteed these will be some of the ways she will ships show you an expert and not a fly-by-night dig into your past for expert connections many people are flattered that you remember them and want their endorsement you could write a book produce top-quality professional men's manuscript per correctly formatted and thoroughly approved and no spelling problems and you will be seen as an expert any time you show your cover of your book so blessed to date review knows why I don't care what you in the note would have to edit this out soliciting solicit reviews offer review copies of your product can always ask for review show photos of your business on your website can also be done for online businesses and offers proof to your potential customers introduce your team use head shots and bio blurbs be consistent with the photos and focus the bias and how your team can help the reader network network network beat meet people in person at conferences workshops community events and mastermind retreat or online on zoom say hello online be positive come up with solutions for bad conditions show people how you handle pressure positively don't complain on social media there to share share share provide valuable information people can use immediately will make them pay for every tip or bit of information that you give and 21 seek feedback all the time from your customers clients your industry JV partners and you want another pair of eyes can see glaring mistakes that we often miss so these are just some of the 21 ideas they could have for when you set up your business website and do any social media on how you can show that you are credible expert in what you do and I hope these are very useful for you and will see you next time

  • Esther is an attorney turned marketer turned sales executive turned success consultant. In her personal journey through various careers, life challenges, achievements, and some failures along the way, she was perpetually seeking the answers to "who am I", "why am I stuck", and "how can I be successful." "In my deepest core, I knew that it was my destiny to do more, to be more, but just when I would be at the cusp of "more," I felt like something was holding me back, like a ball and chain on my ankle weighing me down from grasping my success. Through a great deal of work -- personally, and with coaches -- I came to understand exactly what (or should I say who) was holding me back: ME! I realized I wasn't afraid of failure -- I had failed plenty of times in my life; I was afraid of success! " "So I imagined a world in which I was successful. And from this, es, esq., - Success Consultant, was born. Outside of work, I enjoy being a mama, wife, sister, daughter, friend, and community leader. I am a voracious reader, spirituality enthusiast, day hiker, grammar nerd, and puns and dad jokes producer. I have been told that I have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge, and that I am the most positive person my friends know. "

    Hello everybody. This is Jane Gardner of Finding Your Purpose. Today, we are doing spotlight, spotlighting purpose driven entrepreneurs and how they found their purpose and what their business is and how the knowing their purpose has helped them be successful with theirbusiness, as well as of course talking about their business. 'Cause we love business. And today on today's show, we have Esther Shpitalnik of es-esq.com Jane My apologies, Esther, I'm going to, you can direct, we're going to just go ahead and you can correct me and we can start again. Let's go ahead. This is called imperfect action. Esther I love it. Improvising. I love it. Jane So Esther, how was, could you say your name again for us Thank you. Esther Of course. It's Esther K. Shpitalnik. Jane Okay. Thank you. Thank and today you were graciously enough to come on and talk about your purpose and your business. And I'm really excited to have you here because it's something I love to find out how people find their purpose, cause finding your purpose, Purpose can be hard. And so when you found it, it's a time to celebrate. So Esther, how did you find your purpose?

    Esther That's a really good question and it wasn't easy. It's not like one day I just opened up a book or opened up a drawer and I found it in there. It took a long journey of first learning, what my purpose wasn't, first learning what I didn't want to do. And that was a lot of trial and error and many different career paths and cities that I lived in. And then just really listening to my intuition, really, honing in on who I am to my core. And I guess where I found my purpose was deep inside my core.

    Jane

    Oh wow. That's great. Yeah. Yeah. I know a lot of people, they keep searching and searching and they never really find their purpose. So, so that's great that you've been able to find your purpose. And in fact, I think your business, I've been to your website and I think you actually that is your purpose is to help people maybe more than finding their purpose, but, please, Esther, what, what do you do for others then for their business.

    Esther Yeah. So I like to think about it. Like, have you ever been stuck where you are and you know, you've achieved a lot and you look back and you're like, okay, I've done a lot in my Life, but I'm just stuck somehow. Like I know I could be doing more. I know I could be fulfilling my own purpose. I just don't know how to get there. and that's really the person that I helped because I was there myself. and so that's what my business and that's what my service is all about. Helping that purpose driven individual, that high success person to get unstuck and reach their next level. And if that means finding their purpose or achieving their purpose, then that's what it's all about.

    Jane Oh, awesome. Awesome. Thanks Esther. That's a great analogy. Cause I know a lot of entrepreneurs who are stuck, you know, only doing their business rather than actually, you know, going to the higher level of their business. And, and I know that, you help, in 30 minute consult, have a chat with people and get an idea on, on their business and everything. What exactly, what exactly sort of, what do you do when, when you're talking to them just initially, because sometimes, you know, then it's really hard to, well, we're stuck, right So it's very hard to tell really.

    Esther You're totally right. Some people sometimes we don't know if we're stuck or where we're stuck. And so in that 30 minute consultation, you get a chance to talk one-on-one and I find out to the core, you know, what is it that you're really seeking what solution can I provide for you What issue do you have or what dilemma do you have that I can help solve for you And we go through, a series of exercises and just a conversation. And very often people come out of that consultation out of that conversation saying, actually, this is what I want, or this is what I need help with. This is my dilemma. And then me Esther, the success consultant, that's how I can help those individuals.

    Jane Wow. That's awesome. Yeah. I think on your website, you have a few testimonials from people that you've helped and you know, you're working with that. And, you mentioned that, you would like to, talk about a guide to law of attraction. maybe you could talk about that because I could use a guide to the law of attraction.

    Esther So I've spent a lot of time reading and listening to podcasts and really consuming myself in the whole law of attraction. And I just kept coming back to this idea of like, I wish there was a real person's guide to law of attraction. Like sometimes it's just, and I love, I call it the woo woo stuff. I love the woo woo stuff. Sometimes I think it's fascinating, but like as a real person, I'm like, okay, this law of attraction idea sounds great, but how do I actually put it into practice into use. So I've sort of developed the, a real person's guide and really what it comes down to. It's a very simple thought, very simple motto that I have. So the thoughts that we think directly correlate to the actions that we take. So I'll repeat that because I think it's really important to think about the thoughts that we think directly correlate with the actions that we take. Esther And so I'll dissect that a little bit. So if we think a certain thought, like for example, true story. I, you know, I had student debt, I had student loans and credit card debt. And if I, if you think I'm in debt, if you think I am poor, if you think I am broke, your actions are gonna lead to the same place where you are broke or in debt. But if you think I am financially free, I am out of debt. If you think I have savings, then the actions that you take are going to correlate to that. So when I was in credit card debt, for example, my thought was, I am out of credit card debt. I'm financially free of credit cards. And so once I started thinking about that, when I went to reach for my credit card, I put it right away. I haven't used a credit card in over three and a half years because I thought I'm not in debt and therefore I am not using my credit card. So that's kind of the simple version.

    Jane Oh wow. That's an interesting concept for sure. Yeah, yeah. Especially, your, you know, your, process is very important in, in this, in this time, for the challenge of pandemic and, and, and yeah, we're going to mention it because, you know, in 2020 it's, it's, it's behind all of us and, and I was wondering, have you had any , well, I tried to ignore the pandemic and, and have you had anyone who's been challenged I know a lot of actually entrepreneurs who are saying, Oh, everything's uncertain. I'm not going to do anything. You know, you know, I'm not even going to start anything new or, you know, and I, and I don't really believe, you know, that's a good idea. So have you had any, discussion with people on that.

    Esther I mean, I had the most important discussion with myself about that actually. So again, I really believe the thoughts that we think correlate to the actions that we take. And I had actually started a new position in April at the height of the pandemic for three weeks. And after three weeks, the company unfortunately had to lay off 20% of the company, myself included. and I took it as an opportunity. I said, what is this, what is this blessing. What is this opportunity. It's what I think in the hardest of times is when we come out with our greatest opportunity and I had all of the makings of this idea to start my business. I had wanted to start my business for several years and I just never got around to it. it was never the right time. I just never got my stuff together. Esther And then here I am at the height of the pandemic, I've just lost my job. I have a one-year-old, so, you know, but I thought, if not now than when, like, this is my opportunity, I'm, you know, no one's leaving their house. No, one's really hiring. So why not start my business now. And, you know, I had found my purpose and now the universe gave me the opportunity. And so in terms of the pandemic to answer your question, conversation that I had was very important with myself. And to me, it was, it was, an opportunity and a blessing.

    Jane Oh, that's amazing that you would start a business during a pandemic. I get that. That is true belief in the power.

    Esther Think about back to the recession in 2008, the, you know, the hardest times make us the most resourceful. And I was coming out of law school in, right at the height of the recession, it was so hard finding a job, but everyone in my cohort, we became so much more resilient and so much more resourceful. And if we're like, okay, if I can find a job at the height of a recession, I can do anything. And that's how I feel about starting this business. And for anyone, like, if you can get through this, if you can get through the pandemic with a positive attitude, you can do anything. And that's what I've told my clients, you know, like if you can get through the hardest times in your life and come out of it on the other side, then you can do anything.

    Jane That is true. my husband and I, we have a structural engineering firm. We haven't stopped, but, you know, the contractors have stopped. So I'm, you know, we're grateful that we still have work, but yeah, it's, it's been a challenge. So I really appreciate that, that concept of an amazing story. Actually, you should mention that to everyone that you're starting your business in the middle of the pandemic.

    Esther Good for you for continuing yours.

    JANE Wow. So, yeah. So if you've got any tips for people on, that they can take right now, away with them, before we go on, on, you know, with some of the things that they can do for keeping positive and getting to action, into action.

    Esther I believe in action, action, thoughts equals action, Things that I've done, for a few years now, it's kind of like my, my Jedi mind trick, or my trick is, oftentimes if we start thinking about something negative, this pandemic and anxiety, we start spiraling, right Like we start ruminating and then thinking about all of the terrible things, and this can be anything from the pandemic, or maybe you had, you know, a negative interaction with your boss or a fight with your spouse, or literally any bad thing. We start thinking and ruminating and like, Oh my God, all of these bad things. So my trick is I actually think of, I, I pick one place or thing that brings me joy. And, and when I'm having those negative thoughts, I think about that one place. And I think about all of the details of the one place. So for example, I'm from the East coast, I'm from Boston. Esther My favorite place on earth is Newport Rhode Island. I've been going there my whole life. It's beautiful in the summer. It's peaceful in the winter. it's right on the ocean. And when I'm having these really negative thoughts, I start thinking about Newport. And I think about, what it smells like, what it looks like on a cold day, what it looks like on a warm day, what I would eat there, what I would wear that literally every single detail I can think about, and the reason why this works and the reason why this helps is because it switches your mind from one thought to another. And then once you start thinking about, okay, like Newport, Rhode Island, or maybe for you, it's Seattle, or somewhere like that, your mind focuses on something else. And especially if it's a place that brings you joy. Esther And the reason why I try to think about a place or a tangible thing rather than a person is because a tangible thing or place, there's no, back and forth. There's only the emotion that you put into it. So for example, I wouldn't necessarily think about my daughter, although I love her, you know, that could create like emotional, well, you know, like there's another person involved and emotions and feelings and thoughts, whereas a tangible place or thing you yourself have attached meaning to it. And if it's a place that brings you joy, you've attached the joy. And so the quick thing that you can do is like, okay, bad thought, Oh, I had a fight with my boss and now everything's bad. I'm going to get fired Newport, Rhode Island. And I've done that. And it works. Yeah.

    Jane I've been meaning to get back to painting because that's my joy, but in busy. So, and my husband wants to go to Seattle to see the, see the baseball, which is over now. So he can't do that anymore. Esther For example, you're just having a tough day or something like that. You don't necessarily have to like, maybe you can't get to painting, even think about it. And you can say, Oh, you know, that blue would look so nice with that yellow and that green I'm going to paint this. And then suddenly your mind refocuses from that negative thought to your painting. Jane Yeah. That's a great idea. Yeah. I like that idea. I've been trying to get back in that room, but it's everything else is pulling you. I wanted to speak about, about your body language for, a positive mindset. Cause I think that's really, really important. Your body is, you know, you and, and, and finding your purpose is all about your personality and being aware of yourself. So this would be a great topic. And if you have a little takeaway for everybody, that would be great to

    Esther Yeah. the easiest way you can change your mindset is just smile. I mean, if you have to fake it, watch this. I just, I just suddenly got hacked. you know, body language, it, your thoughts equals your actions. And one of your actions is your body language. And the word implies body language, what we say with our body. And if you're slouching in your phone, everything's bad, then everything's bad. But official back chin is up smile. Even if you're alone, even if you're on the phone with someone, just by virtue of just taking those tiny little body language steps, especially the pile battles, start changing your thoughts also.

    Jane Oh, that's awesome. But I'm also talking to you, Jane, so yeah, no, I mean, honestly, I've had a, had a bad weekend, so I should have gone into my painting room or, I'm been watching some, Jim Gaffigan on youtube Oh, he always makes me feel better. So, you know, that's always good. So, yeah. So, I think we'll wrap up and, and, and ask you what you'd like to tell the audience. we've already given them a couple of things that they can do to keep positive. And so, yeah, sure. And then we'll, we'll just mention your offer.

    Esther So I think what I'd love to leave the audience with is the idea of finding your purpose isn't necessarily opening up a drawer and finding it. It's about being the most true to yourself and whatever that looks like. And when you are yourself and you're true to your core, then you and your purpose sort of come together and find each other and that's not to say that it's easy to be yourself in a world where, everything, and everyone's trying to get you to be what they want, but, to be truly who you are to yourself, you will inevitably you and your purpose will find each other.

    Jane Awesome. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's amazing the different ways that people find their purpose. So as there, what ,because I haven't, what would you say, is your success consulting about, and, your 30 minutes, we've already talked about your consultation. So what, what would you like to just say briefly again about your, consultation, and, and how you work with them on their success again, please.

    Esther Sure. So the consultation is a way to get to know me, to get to know you and for you to know what your purpose is for, or what's what solution or what problem that you have. And you might not know it just yet, but after 30 minutes of talking and really exploring that together, we come up with that, what it is that you want to focus on what you want to solve, and then in our work together, and me as your success consultant, I help you achieve that success that you're looking for in whatever arena of life that you hope to get.

    Jane Awesome. Awesome. Well, thank you. Thank you Esther for coming on. You're my first interview guest on spotlight. I did see on your website, so I am going to say on your website, you talked about your podcast. Oh, here it is. Over here, that interviewing is tough and you have six steps to interview success. On Cruit Group podcast 6 steps to interview success.

    Esther And thank you, Jane, for having me. I really enjoy chatting with you. And this was really fun.

    Jane thank you very much For more on Esther's consultation. Go to ES- ESQ.com.

  • I have a feeling that I'm going to be different sides of broadcast today today it's going to be again about credibility and how to showcase your credibility and your expertise in order to be seen as credible so today were going to be talking about credibility and how to showcase your expertise so today it's all about knowing that you have to be credible so what is credible well it's believable you have to be believable you have to deliver believable quotes you have to be able to connect to communicate with your ideal clients and you have to have customers that know you are the go to person in your field so in order to get that you need to be out there and showing your face so step one put the past into perspective realize that it takes time to build up credibility that think about others who gained your trust what caught your attention what did you feel about them that person offer that made them seem to be credible what did you buy and why how well did that product deliver how hard you have to work to maintain that relationship did they disappear or are they still here in your email in your information etc. and what's the connection instant or was it developed over time after they showed you that they were credible so step to what credentials do you need to succeed this will depend on your niche will you need to have a degree certifications and accreditations or will personal experience and practical working experience be the things that will prove your credibility are credentials necessary again it depends on your niche and what you are doing there are certain obviously niche is where you have to have certain credentials and certifications in order to be an accountant etc. so you have to consider do you your successful competitors have certain if the cancer accreditations do they display their degrees after their name do they show accreditation stamps or professional organizational logos on their website if yes then accreditation is important and so you should join the same professional organizations and of course check your local laws for most businesses whether there home-based or retail or brick-and-mortar they usually have course have to have a business license certainly in my community so displaying your credentials show your potential clients a professional membership is beneficial to them always pay attention to new laws regarding certification shall what is legally required for your field show what your client or customer most urgently needs and focus on giving proven results to your customer or client step three minding your competition your competitors position their own credibility what do they sell what do they present the you don't have what advantages do they have that you don't what other clients praising or complaining about when it comes to the competitor their website their service there customer service figure that all out and to decide how you're going to be able to be better than your competition step four storytelling will of course storytelling is ancient so we all love stories so think of your website as your story live your story in social networks guest blog post YouTube videos media and live venues when you're doing a workshop tell stories your story should mirror your ideal clients tell your story about how you lost your shoes in the mud when you walk through the swamp in 1995 what they care about is your story on how your software was able to get you the kind of results that they want so that you understand their challenges and can provide a solution by showing may be how you check had challenges creating the software how to tell a great story will the best ways to build credibility is to be real to like it is than edit out anything that doesn't relate to your ideal client find out their biggest problem desire or need and tap into that hidden fear or desire frustration and build loyalty and credibility so that you also have had that fear and you have found a way of course to get out of that fear and build your credibility with them of course always be yourself speak with your own voice and even show your face why pretend images for void cartoons what you hiding behind they say they want to know when reading your blog posts and articles people should hear the same voice as if they were speaking to you on the phone go ahead dictate your story for your blog posts into a phone there are certain communication software that you can just phone it up and it will record what you're saying and there you will you got a blog post in your voice that you can download be ruthless with your storytelling adjectives and adverbs key percentages sentences speak properly keep your sentences short avoid self-indulgence avoid venting or sharing antidotes and not relevant when it comes all about you instead of your audience reveal just enough to connect emotionally and focus on your client our customers and stay focused on them remember it's all about them it's not about you when you're telling your story be repetitive communicate in the manner your audiences come to expect use templates to achieve repetitive consistency keep regular recurring features people recognize and remember repetition equals structure structure legal safety safety equals credibility now that's a big one and it needs to be repeated safety consistency equals credibility be real if you appear to live a perfect life your customers won't relate to you if your audience knows you have the same struggles and frustrations they will admire your ability overcome is not about you it's about your customers and their particular journey so remember it's not about you when you're talking about a story think about in terms of them and how they may be struggling with the same things that you did but you managed to find your way out of it so now think about your audience totally understand your particular unique audience and those who search for you consumers and clients will require more proof of your credibility include talents the more thoroughly you can understand and anticipate problems the better you can prevent misunderstandings and dissatisfaction happy clients equals better recommendations equals stronger accountability so remember always get recommendations from your clients and put them on your website as an aside practical experience thoroughly understand what you are sharing selling and teaching understand that what you share is valuable and valid provide well rehearsed and researched information that your client can you successfully generally folk genuinely focus on serving your client and how you do that you asked them ask your customers and clients at all times what you need what kind of feedback do you have me for the product etc. do calls to surveys find out if there's anything that they need that you hadn't even thought of so care about their problems find real solutions for their problems don't just say go and read a book find that book and send it to when you value yourself and by your customers and clients it's easier to find the perfect solution more practical experience you have the more confident your feel the more practical experience you have the more people will recommend you to others promote yourself in the right places promote yourself show don't tell creative video series to showcase your talents that each video build upon the previous information workup to showcasing your product or service publicize each video episode ask other people to share your links make sure each episode demonstrates the most common problems people may have make sure each episode offers a simple and logical solution to that problem and challenge don't overwhelm with industry jargon you may have someone listening you doesn't know the jargon so you want to be able to have an audience that understands what you're saying focus on your customer and helping the master this particular need right teaser blog posts about your videos and embed the video on the same page these days is required for the disability act in the United States but you have video and text on your website so that anyone can come to your website and understand what you are saying to them whether it's through text or video or sound actually and audio you have to have audios well is a requirement so that someone who is blind can come to your site and be able to listen to your advice include screenshots from your video and when people see your face and hear your tone of voice that builds instant credibility and relationship so I guess I should show my face right now report promote yourself ask and share always include up call to action and all your blog post podcast social post webinars and videos limited to only one call to action there can be for listed on the one link to the product the author wants you to buy one link to share the knowledge and social milk media one incentive in the opt in form and one personalized opt in form just for you and stay up-to-date on changes in your field new developments and changes news new products new ways of doing things deliver this news before others and you will be seen as credible and authentic be transparent and admit when you don't know the answer find a suitable answer build your reputation people should know what you stand for what you can provide what you can help them with what you won't be able to help them with and learn to listen your client wants to know you care about them don't worry about saying the perfect thing even if you've heard this question before it's new to your client or customer real listening involves acknowledging narrowing back restating the main product point and wait until your questionnaire has finished asking your question before offering solutions that's a big one for me I tend to interrupt so watch out for me and also use your current and professional photographs on your site know your mission know your values don't be afraid to say I don't know let me find out reassure them deliver what you promised doesn't do what you said it would optional upsell should be present for people who want more not as a missing piece of the solution providing more than the customer asked for his optional avoid offering extra bonuses if they are not related to the product you bought it bought do not add or enhance or require sign-ups for each one people are going to get fed up easily if you have too many upsell's as they say testimonials referrals and recommendations this reassures anyone that you are credible make it easy for customers to recommend you use calls to action ask for referrals make it a habit make a part of your contractor a sales agreement that's a new one make it easy to do with sharing social media buttons make it part of your printed material and part of your website these are things which make it easier for you to be seen as credible if you have recommendations from others customer service after the sale focus on follow-up and customer service provide customers with easy customer service options easy access to your site find information quickly multiple ways to contact you under hat stand how you will respond and what timeframe and consider outsourcing your customer service is tasked to begin with just because they might be quite a heavy use of it and you want to make sure that customer service and the responses are quick and even if they don't have the answer they get send it on to someone who knows the answer follow-up follow-up follow-up nurture nurture and nourish and continue to build your relationship with your fans and followers remember their fans and followers so they want to have contact from you visitors and subscribers customers and clients will want to have information from you and value they may not want you selling them every two minutes but they certainly want to find out how you're doing and what if there is what's coming up next maintain multiple platforms social media forums guest speaking events planned well so there's in your web visibility and treat your clients and customers as real relationships you may not meet them face-to-face ever but you may get into conversation through email or through a phone so be there and care about these relationships and you will be seen as credible and someone they can trust this credibility is all about trust dumper born people with constant you are first given time check out use and think about your last opera don't disappear for weeks or months at a time be remind them that you're your round provide tips frequently asked questions and answers to questions keep them up-to-date on changes or products new in your field will that's quite a few things to do and if you do all of those things you certainly will be credible and you will have people coming back to you again and again because they will understand who you are and what your you type of person you are and and how you credible you are and whether it's worth it to them to continue relationship with you so this was all about credibility and being seen as an expert and so that was plenty of tips plenty of action steps for you to do for your website and your social media etc. and I hope you enjoyed listening

  • Hi everyone. This is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose today. It's all about spotlight. We're going to be talking about a spotlight of purpose driven entrepreneurs.

    And today we have Angela Capinera of Your Mind in Bloom, and she is going to be talking about her business and how finding her purpose helped her be successful in her business. So, Angela, please, introduce yourself. Angela Thank you, Jane. Nice meeting you. My name is Angela I'm the owner of Your mind in bloom LLC. As far as finding my purpose, it began basically in college. they needed peer tutors for other students and a professor of mine recommended me and I continued doing it through college and afterwards, basically as a contractor, independent contractor. and then about 11, 12 years ago, I finally said I need an LLC. Because again, I was going through other people and getting frustrated again 'cause you have to constantly remind them, hello, I'm here. So is it's time for me to get an LLC and especially what I do working with people, it was time. So your mind in bloom was born. Jane Wow. Yeah. I never even thought of, of that as, as, as you know, continuing on as a business. So that's great. So what, what do you do now then for, for people in your business, you were mentioning that you, you mentor quite a few people in different varieties of people who are struggling, what are they struggling with. Angela So I've kind of narrowed it down and I see people who are in transformation and transition, and people who are struggling. So again, my pitch is I help people with resumes, cover letters. I do academic tutoring for all ages, all subjects, children, teens, adults, learning doesn't stop. When you turn 18 or graduate high school, people still struggle as adults. I work with English language learners. I've had students from all over the world. I work with special needs learners. I've worked with people who are both English language learners and special needs learners. I do that. I do writing. So again, college essay writing is a big, inquiry I have. And another niche I have is helping people with state licensing exams. So people who want to be EMTS, fire, police, plumbers, you know, computer technicians. I have somebody right now for cosmetology. I've had several of those clients. They need help with the anatomy and physiology and science part of it. Real estate. I'm helping somebody with real estate right now as well. Jane Wow. Yeah. That's, that's amazing. You know, and I never even thought of that, that you could help with, with exams because, that is true. I mean they know certain things for the exam, but then they, the base, the basic knowledge you have to help them with then. And how do you help people with language, that's that must be pretty hard to be for a non English speaking people, you know, do you have any languages other than English. Angela Whereas in Spanish, I learned a word here or there if I need to but again, basically, it's very a bottom up to, starting at the bottom, working your way up, bottom up to top process. And, again, working with background knowledge, what background knowledge do they have everybody's different. It depends on their first language, school system. it's a variety of things. Some people are very confident in speaking. Some people are not, it just depends on the person. So I work with them one on one to kind of figure out where they need help and we go from there. Jane Wow. Hmm. So, well, how are you focusing these days. What, with the challenge of the pandemic, are you still finding that people are coming to you and needing, and they must be needing a lot of information these days I would think, you know, for exams and that kind of knowledge. Angela Yep. People are still coming to me. it was a challenge in the beginning shifting to zoom. The good part is now again, I can help anybody anywhere. I don't have to get my car and drive, which I miss but, it's been nice. 'Cause usually again, if somebody says, well, I can only meet you on X day. And if I have two other clients, I can squeeze them in or put them in afterwards. I don't have to worry about driving around, all day. So now I can take clients anywhere out of state international doesn't matter. Jane Hmm. So you're getting very international. Now that you're on zoom, Angela, you'd like to talk about, you're finding a lot of people need to own their value and you help them with it. Angela Correct. so one thing I do do, is I help other small business owners. But it's kind of the same thing as helping my clients, when it comes to owning value. One thing I've heard a lot over the years from my clients, Oh, I don't know this. Oh, I'm not smart. Oh, I can't do this. And I always tell people, you know, a lot more and you have a lot more experience than you give yourself credit for. You know, a lot of people come to me like again, I'm going to use a test and use as an example. They're brilliant and whatever their chosen profession is. So for example, my cosmetologists, they're great. You know, they do wonderful work on somebody's hair. you know, they can mix everything. They know how to style somebody's hair. They're awesome. But then when it comes to the written part, they're like, I don't know anything. I never learned this in school, blah blah. And I'm like, okay, stop. again, a lot of it is negative self talk, so I try to stop them from negative self-talking and say, okay, tell me what you know. And then once we get talking, they're usually like, Oh, I didn't realize that. Or, Oh yeah, I do know that or, Oh, I have that. I have heard that, but I just don't know how to apply it. Jane Wow. Angela And then, again, when I talk with other small business owners, it's the same thing. And I was even having this discussion a couple of times this week, again, dealing with people who don't want to pay you what you're asking or I had, one person and she has been very gracious to me. She has given me several referrals. she told me she couldn't afford me. so she hired a college student for free. And I said, again, I'm willing to work with you as far as payment, but I'm not willing to work for nothing. Angela So you have to stand up for yourself and say, look, this is my, this has been my experience. This is how many years I have cumulative. Again, if you're paying me for my background knowledge, you're paying me for my services. You're paying me for my expertise. so again, basically you're paying for, what I'm bringing to the table, Jane Right Yeah. Yeah. I was finding, Angela , did a lot of small businesses because of the pandemic, A lot of them haven't gone on to the internet, a lot of the small businesses and there's a need out there. Have anyone reached out to you to help them with content for the internet and that kind of thing, or they're basically looking at proposals and other kinds of work from you. Angela I haven't really had that. I've had a lot of people reach out. Like, how do you handle zoom I'm a kid I'm dealing with clients. A big thing is again, I work with a lot of tough customers and a lot of people who again, are on the lower socioeconomic, rung, so to speak. Right. And so again, they may not have, I mean, they have zoom and they have internet capabilities, but they don't have, you know, again, secure internet connection. They don't have this, they can't get on the internet, blah, blah, blah, blah, or, so again, it's just being willing to work and adjust to again, what they do have. I've taken a lot of Dramamine the last few months because they're on Facetime with me, the phone's jiggling. And I'm like, Ooh, you know, but again, they're, they, they can't, they don't need it. They can't figure it out. They don't have the capabilities to take a picture and I say, okay, send it to me. so again, I just have to work with where they're coming from. Some people don't want that flexibility. They, you know, they want, they want the best of everything and I'm like, you just have to work with people where they're at. Jane Yeah. That's for sure. Yeah. Sounds like you have a lot of experience in training on how, how, how to do yeah. Yeah, yeah. So, so that's great. 'Cause I mean, you've already mentioned about how, you should own your value and, and basically you you're telling them, you know, not to sell themselves short. you know, I had another, subtopic here of making a list of everything you do today. Would you recommend that for everyone or for your clients what. Angela I just having it written down somewhere, so you don't forget it there's the Chinese proverb of the faintest ink is stronger than the strongest man. Jane Wow. I like that one Angela Again. I've. and again, everybody has to be willing and open to accept and receive it. I've told people, you know, I literally had to walk people through how to put me in their schedule on the phone, you know, reminders, you know, put it on your phone. If again, you're using your phone for everything. you know, as far as study time, you know, set it on the phone every day at a particular time, that works for you. again, little, little things like that. some people don't like paper and pen. again, those like a lot of people I work with have had really bad educational experiences and that's not knocking anybody or any indicator. It's just, I got one client right now. She was pushed through. She never had chemistry, in high school. And now she's again trying to get her cosmetology license and she's like, I never did that in school. I never did that in school. And I'm like, I can't say to her, please pick up a pen and write it down somewhere. I just have to work with where she is at. it's the phone It's the phone. Jane Hmm. Wow. No, I didn't realize. Yeah, you're really quite experienced in working with people that way you should put it on your resume. Angela, Angela. no, I, I know a lot of people who have trouble with Zoom, so that's a great that you help them out cause it to be patient. It is very hard now it's a really hard skill to be patient, so that's great. Thank you. So, so I'm patient with your people. So you mentioned that you're working on a calendar, Angela, and you even have a sample copy for us. So maybe we can put that up and, and have a look. I'll bring the camera back to you when you're ready. Are you ready Yup. Yeah, that's great. Angela Again, one thing with marketing and advertising, everybody always talks about ROI, return on investment, what works best and every business is different. some businesses are good with the the little average, you know, little stuff. me, I'm kinda like, well, I could give that out, but I noticed that too with the business cards that gives them a business card, they stick it in their purse or pocket or wherever, and six months later I'd see them, they pull it out. Like I have some of your business card. I'm like, okay, that's not quite where I want to just discards end up. But all right. so one thing I started doing a couple of years ago, I got this idea again from a website. Do a calendar because it's something that's in front of everybody the entire year. And, there's a website I found like word of the day or something, one word. so the word I picked that, and last year was the first time I did this. I did a sample calendar the year before than handed it out to a couple of people. It was like, Hey, just take a look curious. So the year, the word for 2020 was persistence. and I actually got that from, Jane It was a good word for 2020, definitely. Angela Calvin Coolidge. The president of the United States. He wrote nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not, nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not. Unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not. The world is full of educated derelicts, persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan press on has solved and will always solve the problems of the human race. Jane Hmm. For sure. Angela So I put this quote in the calendar for 2020, and I chose for 2021, the word fortitude. and again, this is my sample right here. Oh, I have to get it printed. Right. And again, one thing I've learned over the years, working with people, again, everybody going back to paper and pen, everybody has their different styles. Some people write, some people draw, some people doodle, whatever. so I said, instead of doing lines, cause people are usually intimidated by lines. It hems them in. They don't like it. so I chose word of the year. I have some quotes here, goals and habits for the month. So again, you can fill in just however you want, wishes for the month and then you're accomplished. Jane Oh, great. That sounds great. Yeah. Angela And people are like, Oh, do color, do pictures. And again, a lot of people are distracted by pictures and colors. I said, yeah. And go black and white, nothing fancy. so again, it's easier for a lot of people to read. And then again, just it'll look like this when it's done. Jane Oh, okay. Yeah. Oh, okay. All you put it at the top part. That's the top part of the calendar. Gotcha. Now. Yeah. Wonderful. Oh, and of course you've got your name on there, I assume. And at the top. That's good. Yeah. I get, I get boring, boring ones from realtors. So I think yours would be a lot more useful. That's great. Angela That's what I did. And I picked a quote from Theodore Roosevelt, Helen Keller and William Faulkner who spoke about fortitude. Jane Wow. Yeah, that's great. Huh. Okay. Well that's great. Angela, let me, just flash that offer up so that people can actually write down the name of your website. there we go. So there is your website, your mind in bloom. Tell me a little bit about your name for your website, Angela. While we look at those. Cause that's very interesting website name. Angela Okay. so again, 10 years ago, and I said, I need an LLC. again, it's not about me, it's about you and helping people. So I said, I wanted something to reflect that. and again, since I do work with people who are struggling and, again, academic focused and language focused, I said, I need something that has to do with mind. And, so again, it's about you. So again, I was, I was batting ideas off my husband at the time, you know, cause again, a lot of people when I was still, independent contractor was Angela Capinera, this Angela, Capinera or that. And like, it's not about me. I wanted to make that clear. so we're batting some ideas around and he said, Oh, what about your mind in bloom. Jane Yeah. So wonderful one. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. It's all about mindset. Isn't it. And evolving it. Yeah. And you've been doing this for quite a long time. You said 10 years. Angela Yeah. I'll have my LLC 10 years. Jane Wow. Wow. That's a learning process in its own. Yeah. Well, no. I mean, yeah, just the way the internet has changed. and, and fallen this year. well, I, I, the, the good thing this year is that everybody now knows how to use Zoom. That's my, my good thing for this year. We can get through this. So that was great. So Angela, this is great. Have you got any final thoughts Otherwise we'll wrap up and put your offer up there. Angela I just always tell people, Carpe diem seize the day. Oh, wow. don't give up, it's all about persistence, determination, grit, knowing your worth. not being afraid to get out there and say, yes, I find a lot of people, you know, they're like, Oh, I wish I'd done that. I wish I'd done this. And I was like, well, all you gotta do is say yes or ask a question. I know there've been times people are like, Oh God, it's you again, you know, kind of thing. but again, it's a, I'm, I'm interested if you're interested in something say I'm interested. I mean, the worst somebodies going to say is, no, at least you tried. And again, when it comes to again, whether it's academics or whatever I'm working with with somebody, and again, even with the job search right now, I'm dealing with a lot of people who were very frustrated while I sent out 30 resumes and I haven't heard back and I'm like, you have to get out there and network because companies right now, they are hiring, but they're probably getting a bazillion resumes for one position. And it's just, again, not being afraid to pick up the phone and say, okay, I need to talk to somebody or I need to make that connection or go on LinkedIn and say, okay, do I know anybody Or do I have any connections not being afraid to reach out. again, it all comes down to just finding that power within, I think sometimes as a society, we're, we're kind of told to, just to sit there and be quiet, especially women. And I've, I've had to say to several of my clients, you have to stand up for yourself, but I have to get out there and sell yourself. And I don't mean it in a negative way. Cause some people take it that way. but I said, nobody's gonna know, nobody's going to know about you. Nobody's gonna know you're around. Nobody's gonna know your talents. If you don't let people know, about yourself. And even when I'm interviewing people with resumes, they'll be like, I've had people, well, this is all you need to know. But then when I sit down and talk with them, you just find some very fascinating people out there have done some very fascinating things. And I think if you don't put that out there, nobody's going to know. Jane That's awesome. Awesome. As usual you've blown me away, Angela. Cause you know, finding a job is the hardest thing I know. Yeah. I'm, I'm on LinkedIn and it's, it is a good place to connect and network. So, I'm gonna well connect with you for one, I think I out yet. So thanks a lot, Angela. yeah, I, I, I really appreciate it. This has been very, very useful and for everyone I think, and let me just come back to you and say thank you very much, Angela. Angela Thank you. You're welcome. This has been great. Jane Great. Thank you Angela. Contact [email protected] for your 2021 calendar theme fortitude.

  • Well, this is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose TV today I wanted to introduce you to my show is your personality killing your business we are going to be talking about personality and how it affects your business is just great to have the R word killing your business because we want to know that if we learn how our personality affects our business we can be successful so let's go get started on our presentation and I'll tell you a little about myself as well finding your purpose TV we also have of course your personality and your business this is my website as well that on that and is your personality destroying your business success I'm Jane Gardner I work at my husband and our structural engineering firm and I came onto the Internet to basically to help other entrepreneurs and especially if they're running a home business and 2014 I learned about my personality which we can discuss at another time and in my success but on is your personality destroying your business success were going to be to having 12 topics we are going to be talking about credibility how do you keep your credibility why is it important how is it earned credibility what is credibility defined by and what affects your credibility and why do we care because it's all about who you are and being credible really helps you with your success will be talking about the trust of others does your personality kill others trust if you what are the factors that give you the trust of others does your personality mean that you can't find any trust from others at all and how does your actions kill the trust of others were going to be talking about intentional action which is very imperfect important when you're talking about finding your purpose are you intentional in your actions or do you just wander through life this year intentions get in the way of you having business success or are those really your intentions are and maybe you didn't have those intentions but you got confused and that's why you had no business success do you even know who you are and what are your intentions and what it and are you self-aware of who you are going to be talking about self-awareness very important in finding your purpose are you as self-aware as you think you are are you aware studies show that you aren't are you intentional in your actions if you are self-aware you can be intentional but otherwise how does stress increase with increase with ignorance of who you are and other topics on self-awareness and your personality is it fighting you are you doing things that are contrary to your personality which is causing you stress you should be true to your personality and will be discussing how personality has seven different factors and is stress caused by conflict with your personality values very important by your values clear in your business and in your life you know what they are you working your business according to your values or do you just wander through life do you change what you value depending on what is happening in your back and your business what exactly are your values and what are they defined by there is a difference between perceived and actual value so we will having a long discussion on values stress and health everyone knows that stress can affect your health is your stress caused by not living consistently to your values is your stress caused me not living to your purpose is your stress caused by your inability to understand others and is you stress caused by the clash between perceived and actual values of your business we will be discussing this at length to sell his human we have been selling ever since we were born even as a baby were reached out to our mother or father in order to get their attention so everybody is selling themselves in terms of interactions with others and people have different selling styles we will be discussing that as well as different buying styles if you're not aware of that then we should have a long discussion because to be successful in business you need to be able to understand how personality affects your selling style and others buying style and are you an entrepreneur there are different entrepreneurial styles you can be successful if you work with your strengths of your personality rather than trying to develop your weaknesses we can all be entrepreneurs we are aware of the continues to adapt to the entrepreneurial lifestyle these and many more discussions will happen on is your personality destroying your business success leadership there are different leadership styles as well you can be successful if you work with your strengths of your personality and we can all be leaders for where change to adapt discovering your purpose living on purpose reduces your stress being self-aware and intentional can lead to success in your business so were going to be discussing how to discover your purpose finding it being self-aware and intentional can lead to success we will be exploring these and many other topics in the search for finding your purpose if you want to talk about your success in finding your purpose go to http://\JG tips.com\spotlight and enter your contact information to have an interview so there you go there is a full discussion on your personality and how it can affect your business coming up and a lot of factors in terms of your personality so I hope that you have found this useful provocative and you can think about that until the next time this is Jane Gardner and 26 to your success

  • This is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose TV.

    Well, I'm all about credibility because this is what makes the world go around so anyway this is part of finding your purpose once you find your purpose you will be seen as credible as you be self intentional in what you do will be self-aware of why you do what you do and people understand who you are and know and like and trust you see was credible because your consistent in what you do.

    So let's go and talk about credibility again and today it's actually all the basics about credibility and I hope you understand this to find a way probably have to find a way on the website to have a frequently asked questions so you can contact me if you have any questions on this. So anyway today were going to be talking about credibility. Credibility, what is it, what is it mean to you ,who has credibility, who lacks credibility , so what was important why should we care about credibility.

    Well today I'm going to be talking about in this discussion why it is important that you are aware of what credibility is and how it affects your relationships with others how it affects you and the other person in terms of credibility as well credibility is fundamental and foundational for effective leadership and teambuilding in any office it's foundational for relationship development with others if you're doing a job search and selection you have to be seen as credible as well as if you're coaching and teaching you have to be effective and credible person and customer service of course to be in the awesome customer service you have to have credibility and of course in order to do sales you as the sales person has to have credibility otherwise the other person will buy so these are just some of the simple ways that you need to have credibility so let's have a look at what happened here I can something happen here with my slide sorry about that and it's my most important slide so we are going to do that slide it can so I'm not going to stop I'm going to show you what I do I keep going so I am going to do another screen capture and asked myself why this slide move because this is the most important slide open up to you and say credibility is the a level of respect others think about you so well we will start that discussion about what just happened whether you find me credible but yes I respect you and hopefully you respect me because I kept on going so here we go see if it happens again yes it's happened again for some reason my slides have moved up and down during darn now what's going to happen here for some reason I had a slide that wasn't correct so don't stop will talk about credibility and we do this again so there's my studio background and I'm going to be adding another screen capture all of the slide because the slide move down next time check your slides again before you start to make sure they're all the same as credibly credibility goes up so does others willingness to believe what you believe value what you value support your plans help you achieve your goals be honest with you and trust you it's the old no like and trust you credibility very important and any relationships so what makes credibility increase and decrease behaviour basically behaviour because that's all we can see about a person anyway is your behaviour what we see as being appropriate from the other person's perspective not yours to time tats people and situation makes her credibility increase behaviour perceived as being inappropriate for the same factors makes it decrease so credibility has three levels there's yourself your reality is based on your own beliefs whether good or bad and so you can have credibility with you in terms of your reality and who you are will give a little sample later but others the secret to understanding your customers is understanding that they are perceiving who you are from your behaviour and your credibility so then we have organizations they can also have credibility in terms of the organization on how they present themselves I of course should've had some long logos of more well-known companies than mine but this is my bio which is my open bio in terms of who I am where I live who I work with is my husband what I do what I love so I like to think by sharing this file rather than some boring written out text document you enjoy looking at what I enjoyed to do and I have more credibility as a human being and as Americanization I guess because I'm the only one in this organization so delivering developing credibility behaviour examples that build credibility well we could go through them one by one but I think you all understand that honesty helps to develop credibility devotion punctuality being good example for others ethical behaviour taking responsibility for your behaviour when you make mistakes keeping promises forgiving and understanding on other people make mistakes getting involved with the community with your with others volunteering focusing on the positive these are all things that develop your credibility and these are all behaviour so the point to this is your behaviour is what develops your credibility course here are some of the things that can destroy your credibility dishonesty lack of devotion no concern for time setting a bad example on ethical behaviour breaking promises denying responsibility for behaviour being unforgiving not getting involved with others focusing on the negative these are all things that can reduce your credibility credibility and the qualities of credibility from the book by James Ghose and Barry Posner how leaders gain and lose it and why people demand it it's a whole book on credibility and they did a studies and surveys of thousands of organizations of the employees of course in terms of asking them what they felt were credible qualities for a leader and these were the four highest traits of a good credible leader honesty being competent being forward-looking and inspiring inspiring others to do what they need to do as well as being forward-looking looking to the future these are the kind of qualities that make a leader credible feel free to go and look at the book to read more about credibility in the situation your greatest strengths can become your greatest limitations for example who likes to control your business your meetings in your personal life share how you make decisions or listen to other people and their opinions well how much credibility to this leader have with this team not much because they are not be willing to be part of the community and listen to others and it reduces her credibility so what can you do to improve your credibility well one thing that I could've done of course is to check my slides before I started but we are going to be have ongoing discussions on credibility because it's a very important topic because it's all about really knowing who you are and knowing you other people's are and being able to find your purpose so you act with purpose and you understand who you are and you can communicate who you are your qualities to others so that you are seen as credible because of the consistency in how you behave this is going to be quite a discussion on credibility here and finding your purpose TV and anyone who likes to have a discussion with me on camera is welcome to come and share their wisdom as well so hopefully will have a few people coming to discuss credibility and being a leader ask I do have a leadership leadership show so I could go out and get some people who believe being a leader and discuss what traits they think a leader needs to have but today this is all about credibility so let's go and finish so so thank you for listening

  • this is Jane Gardner and I am going to be talking to you about the shows that were going to be having on finding your purpose TV now finding your purpose TV is here of course but it's also on Roku so if you come on and talk to me about these subjects and would like to talk to me about this and be interviewed then you will also be on Roku and have an international audience so let's get started and I'll tell you what the shows off her if you want to talk about your success in finding your purpose I we talked about this one before Spotlight it spotlights purpose driven entrepreneurs who had success so you can go to http://jgtips.com/Spotlight and enter your contact information and have an interview and let's go and have a look at the other ones because I am so excited by the various shows that we are going to have and what happened to the mall there we are I see what happened hold on had the slides so there we go perfection though we are not preferred on this show and doesn't matter as long as we have value were doing okay so finding your purpose TV is about being self-aware and intentional being able to lead to success in your business and your life somewhere will be exploring these and many other topics in the search for finding your purpose so we are going to be having this show that I mentioned before Spotlight if you want to talk about your success in finding your purpose go to http://jgtips.com/Spotlight and enter your contact information tab interview and will be talking together and I also have the celebration show if you want to talk and have a discussion about entrepreneurial success on the celebration show go fill in my form http://jgtips.com/celebration and enter your contact information to schedule time for us to talk course will opt for any of these discussions don't worry will be having some preliminary discussions between us on the questions getting prepared so that we both have an amazing show on Roku so they have also if you want to have a discussion about leadership on the leadership show go to http://jgtips.com/leader and enter your contact information to have an interview I also have the values and ethics show if you'd love to talk about values and ethics and have a discussion you can go to http://jgtips.com/values and enter your contact information there are so that we can talk further about the format what we would like to talk about how values are very important in order to have good entrepreneurial success and if you want to be on the understanding yourself and others show all about communication go to http://jgtips.com/understand and enter your information there and we will have a discussion on what you'd like to talk about and questions and answers and do 30 to 45 minute show all highlighting you and then we also have if you want to talk about who I'm I who are you show this is all about personality and you if you are personality expert you want to talk about your skills and understanding personality feel free to contact me at http://jgtips.com/who and enter your contact information to have an interview with me and what else have I got this show I love which is it might help to know what it's all about it is all about being an introvert versus an extrovert and how we are going to destroy that definition that's used commonly because being different is important in life and we've and if you want to have a discussion on introvert versus extrovert go to HTTP://jgtips.com/viva and enter your contact information to have an interview I will probably be reaching out to some introvert and extrovert relationship experts as well so I hope to have a lot of variety of discussions on being an introvert and extrovert so there we go all the shows are all about celebrating finding your purpose looking for your purpose and celebrating who you are as your personality so I hope that you find this of interest I'll be hearing from you soon and let's go and Spotlight your business highlight years business as purpose driven entrepreneur who's found their purpose in life leading them to their success thank you for listening Jane Gardner

  • This is Jane Gardner and welcome to finding your purpose TV today were going to be talking about all the shows that going to be on finding your purpose TV that you can participate in or you can listen to or watch so let's get started over here on our presentation and finding your purpose TV have another's show we talk about the purpose but from the purpose I found that there are going to be a few shows that all can be different and I'm really excited about so you have a spotlight show where we highlight purpose driven entrepreneurs who found their purpose in life which is leading to their success so I'm going to be having an interview with purpose driven entrepreneurs and I have another little show which I tell you about all the links and where you go to common be interviewed and all that kind of things I'm very excited to go find some purpose driven entrepreneurs as well we have is your personality destroying your business success so we're going to be exploring your personality and how it's affecting your business success are you always on the defensive are attacking others leading to business problems lots of stories obviously they will be about the people themselves but about people they've heard about who destroyed the business from their personality and why you now will discuss how your personality is very important for you and self-aware or not quiz show self-awareness of yourself and your personality plays a role in your relationship with others so I'm going to have to make a quiz show not sure how you can actually participate because Ron Roku but it will be exciting so I hope to do that one soon and then celebration show will be celebrating the success of entrepreneurial businesses and will be looking at what what why how they managed to be success some of the more well-known successes as well as people that I know and they were going to do a leadership show where we celebrate the leaders who lead and how the personality is part of the success and I'll be being on people who help business entrepreneurs be leaders because is not something you're born with it something you have to learn so if we can find out from these leadership coaches send experts on what makes a leader that will be great to values and ethics shall not sure how this was going to work but I think we have to bring awareness that knowing your values will make you intentional in your life so for example what I thought were my actual values are not my actual values their perceived values so will have a long discussion on values and ethics on this show and then understanding yourself and understanding other show were going to look at how you can make relationships and communication were successful when you're aware of your own personality and how it affects others so will be having discussions with entrepreneurs on how they managed to make their relationships and communication successful with others and who am I and who are you show celebrate how different our personalities are at this time in in his at this time of life it's important to celebrate and understand people are different and all the factors that affect who we are different were going to celebrate the introversion extraversion difference and below the definition of introvert and extrovert of the common vocabulary so we can celebrate the uniqueness of everyone instead of putting people down for them being an introvert or an expert extrovert both are important in this world so any and introverts out there please come on board I know the extroverts will but let's discuss how you manage to be successful as an introvert or extrovert so being self-aware and intentional can lead to success in your business will be exploring these and many other topics in the search for finding your purpose so if you'd like to be spotlight in one of the shows if you want to talk about your success in finding your purpose go to HTTP\\GGT IPS.COM\spot light and enter your contact information to have an interview and a discussion with me or with my other hosts will see so this is Jane Gardner and I'm so excited on the variety of shows that were going to have on finding your purpose TV so I'm looking for experts I'm looking for people to share their stories and thank you for listening