Episodes

  • happy valentine's day bbs!

    here is a special DJ mix and Q&A episode of Friend Crush with Amber Akilla.

    i've pulled questions from various Tiktok lives and answered them in between tracks that embody the 'love, lust & loathing' theme.

    i had so much fun making this, i hope you enjoy!!!

    previous mixes are on soundcloud~

    https://on.soundcloud.com/uCwPM

    soundcloud upload~

    https://on.soundcloud.com/DMYKx

    lana del rey - in my feelings

    are my standards too high is there even such a thing?

    brent faiyaz - make luv

    my icks

    newjeans - hurt

    how can you tell the difference between love bombing and genuine love?

    alicia keys - girlfriend

    why do people compare themselves to their ex’s new partner

    sza - blind

    dealing with someone who is confused about what they want

    sugababes - hole in the head

    yung lean - bliss ft. fka twigs

    any advice on how to stop gaslighting yourself, only to realize you were right?

    handsome boy modeling school - the truth ft. roisin murphy ft. j-live

    what do you think of men that romanticize hyper-independent women?

    kali uchis - ¿Cómo Así?

    whats the difference between forgiveness and settling?

    swv - use your heart

    if you have a personal question you can send it to the @friend.crush IG page and it can be chosen to be answered in voice memo format. if you want a personalised answer via text please use this link ⁠https://direct.me/l/67j6⁠

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  • special treat for friend crush listeners ~ i've received a few messages like this one so i felt the wheels turning in my brain and generated this response. i definitely missed out a few things but i hope that this provides helpful perspective for anyone that relates to the situation described.

    if you have a personal question you can send it to the @friend.crush IG page and it can be chosen to be answered in voice memo format. if you want a personalised answer via text please use this link ⁠https://direct.me/l/67j6⁠

    subscribe for exclusive episodes & perks! ♡

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    follow me ☆

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
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  • this episode might be triggering for anyone that's convinced themselves that they like being in a situationship so listen at your own risk :)

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • jealousyyyy is a disease fr - its a human experience, but one that when unmanaged can create more harm than good, mostly to yourself!!! how can we better understand and differentiate jealousy and envy we experience towards others and also when its directed towards us?

    articles referenced:

    https://kazmobrain.com/jealousy-definition-causes-treatment/

    https://www.dictionary.com/e/jealousy-vs-envy/

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    follow me ☆

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    https://instagram.com/friend.crush/

    https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakilla

    https://www.youtube.com/@amberakilla

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • answering a listener message i received recently that prompted me to reflect on what it means to be a "high value woman" and my thoughts on this conversation that's been happening online, growth, trauma, grief and why people cheat.

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    follow me ☆

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    https://twitter.com/amberakilla

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • i've done an episode on this before but i feel like its recently come up a lot in conversations with people in their early-mid 20s. my quarter life crisis was so intense but i feel like i've come out the other end better than i entered it so hopefully this gives you something to look forward to if you're going through this rn!! you are not alone <3

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • i think one of the best ways to develop healthier boundaries is to find activities that you care about that feel beneficial to you (keep you hot and having fun) and allow you to orient your schedule around them. it can't just be work because that's not always just for you, it needs to be a hobby! the dedication to investing time and or money to connecting with yourself is not only beneficial for you but also for how you show up in your relationships. on top of that it also provides an easy filter to see whether others are respectful of this hobby and by extension you and your time.

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    follow me ☆

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    https://instagram.com/friend.crush/

    https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakilla

    https://www.youtube.com/@amberakilla

    https://twitter.com/amberakilla

    https://soundcloud.com/amberakilla

    https://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla

    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • we previously talked about 'what do you get out of it' and recently i've been thinking about 'what do you have to offer' two sides of the same coin kinda. when we better understand who we are and what we contribute to relationships and situations, coupled with an awareness of how we want to live (hot & having fun philosophy), this also assists in how we can make more intentional decisions, better understand and assert boundaries and distance ourselves from connections and experiences that we're not compatible with.

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    follow me ☆

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    https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakilla

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • self-deprecation can seem harmless at times but i feel like when taken to far it can really get in the way of your ability to grow and expand how you see yourself. wild the ways that we can be our own worst enemy! in this episode i discuss how i've come to better understand how to manage self-deprecation in ways that aren't self-destructive.

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    follow me ☆

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    https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakilla

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • so often in life and in love we are bamboozled by other people's validation and desire and forget to ask 'what am i getting out of this', 'how do i feel' ?? this doesn't mean we have to be entirely self-serving but it also doesn't mean we have to be entirely self-sacrificial. i implore you to take a pause and consider this if you find yourself in a mental or emotional spiral over a person or situation. oftentimes we need to recognise the ways we have allowed for clownery in order to be hot and have fun!!!

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    follow me ☆

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  • i think its quite common for listeners of the podcast to be the 'friend group therapist' - the person that everyone goes to for advice when they're going through it. its not that you need to swing to the opposite end of the spectrum and cut people off at the slightest request for your attention but sometimes we need to consider the capacity to which you plug into other people's problems. i feel like i could talk about this topic forever but, here's a start! let me know what you think hehe

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  • i've been thinking about the subtle difference between being offended and being disrespected - maybe in a general sense the difference doesn't matter to that many people but i think having an understanding for myself has allowed me to determine what is worth my energy, who is worth my time and what opportunities being offended or disrespected can actually provide in having more self-awareness. in other words - don't let haters stop you from being hot and having fun hehe

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  • GIRL CONFESSIONSSS this episode was so fun to record, "Sarah" and I have been internet friends for some time now and we barely scratched the surface in this conversation. we cover her experiences on hinge, one of her icks, age gaps in dating, who is expected to pay on the first date, friends to lovers, growing up and dating as a woman of colour in australia and more!!! i hope you enjoyed this episode, let me know what you thought and if you want more episodes with Sarah and/or more girl confessions epsiodes in general !!!

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  • our first boy confessions episode for the season!! 'christopher' just turned 30 and is currently taking some time off from his tech job to rest and reflect. we discuss his dating expectations, how his views on dating and relationships have changed, whether "the spark" is a real thing, dating as a scapegoat from big life changes... and more, i hope you enjoy! let me know what you thought of this episode!

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  • my current thoughts, feelings and understandings around boundaries, how they differ from standards, expectations, preferences and conditions. 'boundaries' is a term that is thrown around the same way 'authentic' is but just because people throw a word around doesn't really mean they understand, let alone practice what they preach hehe

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message
  • you know i feel like so much of my 20s has been about 'what' am i doing with my life, but in the last few years i've focused more on 'how' i am experiencing life, 'am i enjoying myself?' aka am i being hot and having fun and if not, how does a life well lived feel and look like to me and how can i take intentional action towards it? how can i balance portfolio interests with personal interests at different stages and eras rather than thinking that personal fulfilment is dependent on portfolio and professional success?

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    follow me ☆

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  • tale as old as time... you know "what's best" for someone and for some reason they're not doing what needs to be done to be better???? WHYYYYYYY

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  • welcome welcome back to friend crush!!! can't believe its season five!

    i started this podcast during the pandemic as a creative outlet after having my original plans for 2020 cancelled, it became a way for me to process and organise my thoughts in the most cute, chaotic and critical way that i can manage.

    i made it back to shanghai last year and released season four after a few months of being back. its been almost a year since i've been back and i'm so excited to be sharing the next season with you!

    this episode is just a general welcome and thought dump on things i've been reflecting on recently after having recorded about half of the season before i work on the next episodes.

    hope everyone has been well !! missed you !!!

    lots of love,

    amber

    xoxo

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  • wow i can’t believe we’re up to the 70th episode of friend crush!!! thank you so much for tuning in, sending your feedback, sending questions and topic suggestions and sharing with your friends! i’m actually so shook and can’t that you enough! we’re going to go on a lil breaky break over the northern hemisphere summer so i can focus on other projects and prepare for the next season. wishing everyone a slay time in the meantime!!!

    this week’s episode i also answer a listener question about transitioning career at age 24, tune in to hear my thoughts n feelings.

    lots of love!!!!

    ♡ amber

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    ask me a question~ receive a written pep talk from me!

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  • there's a difference between a broken heart and a bruised ego when it comes to breakups - friendship, work, romantic or otherwise. how we process and move on from different ailments requires different treatments!

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    ask me a question~ receive a written pep talk from me!

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    follow me ☆

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    listen to my podcast ♡

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    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/message