Episodes
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When 'acceptable behaviours' are force-fed to us and being 'good' becomes an ongoing pursuit, can we truly avoid people pleasing ? Don joins us in this episode with their razor-sharp analysis about our acquired and inherent need to people please and seek validation. We talk about our experiences of structural isolation and the longingness for acceptance, love, validation and - most importantly - safety. This episode is full of fun, guilt-ridden, quirky and exhausting anecdotes from family, workspaces, and even feminist friend circles- where we went out of our way to please people.Through the conversation, we gently allow ourselves to forgo the shame of wanting to please, recognising how deep it's reasons run. And give ourselves the collective permission to occasionally seek validation and please people for our happiness and theirs. Give this episode a listen and send us your 'sabudana vada' stories on [email protected]
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Even though most forms of collective resistance are premised in a collective quitting of oppressive structures, why does everyday individual quitting bear so much stigma and self-flagellation?
Back after a short break, Anjali joins us in this delicate, nuanced episode to unpeel our relationship to quitting. The difficult process of arriving at the moment of quitting, the hurt and resentment of being quit on, and the complex cocktail of joy, liberation, isolation and hurt it leaves behind. We talk about quitting in workspaces and movements and relationships and the current state of the nation, making room for our own differences and convergences. In our own circuitous ways, we land on fluidity, a yearning for structures that look beyond the binary of belonging and not belonging, and the really not linear role privilege plays within it all.
Listen whenever you can. We're everywhere. Link in bio :) -
Missing episodes?
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What does it take to translate feminist dreams into practice while still navigating the same structures that necessitate this dreaming? How do we think differently about design, knowledge, consent and access when doing so? What of our own lived experiences do we constantly have to learn and unlearn while also grappling with the multiverses of Google Sheets?
We got a chance in this episode to sit down with Jo and Mrinalini, co-producers of trans/form - a pedagogical tool about the violence faced by trans people in South Asia. Fuelled by the very familiar 'let's do a project together' energy that many of us relate to, they both walk us through the complexities of actually building something that collates diverse lived experiences and knowledges, across language and articulation, to end up with something that is truly accessible, co-created and dynamic. From the logo to cat videos to research associates to consent pop-ups and delegation - every single element of the tool is a carefully considered political choice - and each seeks to subvert the ways in which the world as a whole, and academia in particular, seeks to engage with knowledges of marginalised people.
It is a generous, intimate chat about the brick by brick building of feminist realities, and all the hilarious, heartbreaking, affirming detours along the way. Go listen :)Check out their amazing website on: https://transformsouthasia.com/
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In a world where we are examining and re-examining every small detail of ourselves and our conditioning, what explains our collective, visceral, completely uncritical hatred of fatness? Shreya joins us this episode to ask all the uncomfortable questions and drop all the big truth bombs. They walk us through how they navigate the world in a fat body - from doctors and diets, to sizes and sex; from chairs and clothes, to dating and disability. In their matter-of-fact way laced with humour and stinging satire, they lay bare the double standards of a world that is simultaneously invisibilising and making an example of fat bodies. Whether it be in families or workplaces or friend circles, Shreya points out the stilted ideas of beauty, worth, and fitness that thoroughly permeate our ways of being. We confront our own fatphobia, and sit with the discomfort of our own skewed aspirations for our bodies and with ample reminders from Shreya - just fuckin' get over it already.Come, get a lil (un)comfy with us :)मोटापा घटाने के हज़ारों उपाय। शरीर के हर हिस्से को जाँचते परखते रहने की जद्दोजहद। स्वस्थ होने की चाह में शरीर के हिस्सों को नापते नापते खुद से नफरत कर बैठते हैं हम। बातों ही बातों में कुछ इस तरह 'फैट-फोबिआ" हमारी नसों में घुल जाता है, हम जानते हुए भी अनजाने बने रहते हैं। और मोटे न होने के अनगिनत तरीकों से जूझते रहते हैं। इस एपिसोड में श्रेया ने हमें झकझोरा है। मोटापे की सामाजिक संरचना को ईंट दर ईंट खोला है। और हम शांति से बैठ उन्हें सुनते रहे। आप भी सुनिए, शायद बातों ही बातों में अपने शरीर से थोड़ा और लगाव हो जाए। मोटापे से भागने की होड़ थोड़ी कम हो जाए।
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Ritu - master storyteller, expert cockroach swatter and dream library weaver - joins us for an episode bursting at the seams with anecdotes and revelations. We speak about stories - ensconced in books and friendships and sarees - and their power to build and hold feminist realities. We dance across a range of landscapes and emotions - from nostalgic reveries about Champak and Totto Chan, to musings about our complex relationships with libraries, to how stories become conduits for connection and change, to our messy negotiations with control in building feminist spaces. It is all held together by an endless string of fun, funny, profound stories from Ritu, who unpacks her work with building free community libraries and the feminist futures they hold.
If the cold open doesn't reel you in, you might need a *thwack* Ritu-style ;)
यूँ तो हम सभी कई कहानियों का संगम हैं और अपनी ज़िंदगी के किस्सागो भी, लेकिन किस्से सुनने और सुनाने की बातें आम तौर पर करते नहीं। ऋतुपर्णा ने इस एपिसोड में कहानी कहने और सुनने की विदता पर एक पटकथा रची और हम सब उस पटकथा के पात्र बन गए.. हमने अपनी ज़िंदगी के पन्नों से चुन कर ऐसी कहानियाँ सुनाई जो हमारे अस्तित्व में घुल चुकी हैं, जो हमारे दिल-ओ-दिमाग पर अदृश्य छाप छोड़ गई हैं। हमने कहानीकार होने और अपनी कहानी कहने की शैली पर प्रश्न भी उठाए और किताबों से बाहर, सामुदायिक रूप से कहानियाँ पढ़ने, लिखने और ढूँढने की अनोखी कला को भी समझा। तो पेश है एक कहानी कहानियों के नाम...
Send your love and your stories straight to our DMs or drop us a mail:
Mail :[email protected]
Instagram: @fursatfeminism
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How do our complex feelings of being liked, being validated and finding community sit with the messiness of being on social media?
We gathered two of our favourite humans - Sneha and Sravanthi - for a laughter-filled romp of a conversation to kickstart season two. We talked through the joys, the fun, and the hesitations of being People On The Internet; making pit stops at stories of Orkut testimonials, Instagram to IRL friendships, and the intimacies that only come from sharing reels. Come for the careful dissection of vanity and echo chambers, but stay for the chaotic double date energy, the musings of the Social Media Grinch, and a fun (cautionary) tale about parents on the internet. We dare you to leave the episode without some healthy friendship envy.
Join us every second Wednesday as we breeze through a hella promising second season!
Read more from Sneha on this: https://agentsofishq.com/post/main-apni-sabse-favourite-hoon-chronicles-of-an-instaspam-queen ;https://agentsofishq.com/post/platonic-pyaar
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A familiar dollop of the old and a tantalizing dash of the new. The #FursatFeminists - Arundhati and Deepa - are back for Season Two ! Join us every alternative Wednesday starting June 14th for more stories, more laughter, and more epiphanies.
चलिए थोड़ी और गप्पें मारते हैं, कुछ और यादें खंगालते हैं, कुछ नई-पुरानी सुनाते हैं, चलिए थोड़ा और फ़ुरसत से इश्क लड़ाते हैं |अभी तो कई और किस्से, कई और चुटकुले, कई और अटखेलियां, कई और रुहानियाँ बाकी हैं। जुड़िये हम से हर दूसरे बुधवार को साथ कुछ ठहाके लगाने के लिए, बिसरी धुन गुनगुनाने के लिए , फ़िर से अपनी फेमिनिस्ट दुनिया के अथाह समंदर में जी भर कर गोते लगाने के लिए !
Instagram :https://www.instagram.com/fursatfeminism/
Gmail: [email protected]
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Can loitering go beyond being just an act? Can it be a way of life?
Our 'aawara aurat' Isha joins us in this episode to crack open a theme that we've all lived and experienced in more ways than one. She speaks about how she has come to the act of loitering, and how deeply it now sits in her bones and her spirit. We unpack the many ways in which we have loitered - physically, mentally, virtually - and how it is a heady cocktail only when the right elements come together. The conversation, much like the theme, loiters aimlessly and joyously into several pockets of laughter, epiphany and even makes a pitstop at some poetry.
Write to us on [email protected] and share with us how you have loitered. In mind, body, and spirit. -
What is with 'men's' and 'women's' haircuts being priced differently? What's gender got to do with it?
Shraddha brings the incisive questions and the unabashed laughs to this deep dive into our relationships with hair. They help us dig through memory files to pull out the times when our hair was hopelessly entangled with identity, gender, caste, policing and shame - and yet became a tool of coping and subversion. We talk cultural appropriation, share horror stories from salons to schools, and land on some important epiphanies.
Listen in and write to us at [email protected] as we hurtle towards the end of season one. Is there anything you'd like to ask any of the season one guests so far? Send off allll the questions! -
In a world so set on isolating us, why is it that we still seek to live alone?
Tasaffy joins us on this breezy episode to chat about the inexplicable joys of the decision to live alone, and the complicated feelings that surround it. We etch around emptiness, loneliness, and aloneness, swapping stories from Gujarat to Dhaka of renting homes, running them, and every self-appointed guardian along the way. How have we tried to define the terms of our aloneness? How have we had to change them? How have the structures around us sought to make this harder? Why does mental health always poop on the best laid plans? Join us as we attempt to answer the truly unanswerables. And email us your own attempts at [email protected]. -
In a world of prescribed lines and restricted zones what does it mean for women to bend the rules and leave their mark in spaces- virtual, real and intellectual?
In our second Gujarati episode, our dear friend Sonal (or Sonbai as we like to call her) joins us to share her own journey of breaking free and claiming her life. Stepping out of locked doors, securing the 'unconventional' job, having a cup of tea at the tapri, exploring the town on a bike, wearing goggles or sitting on the terrace for hours on end. Claiming spaces for work, identity or just leisure is a rollercoaster ride and in this episode, we share the joy being 'bigdi auratein' together has brought us.
Join us and share your stories of bending the rule book and taking over your space on [email protected]
પિતૃસત્તાના બંધનો માં બંધાયેલી દુનિયા માં ખરેખર પોતાની જગ્યા બનાવી શકાય ખરી?
આ એપિસોડ માં સોનબાઇ - અમારી બેનપણી અને નારીવાદી સાથી - અમારી સાથે તેમના પરિવાર, સમુદાય અને સંગઠન માં જગ્યા બનાવવાના અનુભાવો લઈને જોડાયા. તો આવો, સાંભળો અમારી વાતો, અમારી જગ્યા બનાવવાના સંઘર્ષ અને જગ્યા મેળવવાની ખુશી. -
How have we, as a species, managed to find life on other planets and yet not cracked the secret to well-fitting bras?
Aashika dons a triple cap this episode - that of lingerie designer, historian and feminist - to join us for a fun, candid, complete no-holds-barred discussion on boobs, 'intimates' and fashion. Why were all of our first bra experiences so cringey? Why do we still use a two-dimensional measuring system for a three-dimensional gland? How deeply does history inform our lingerie and fashion choices? Between the male gaze and a 52-week-fashion cycle, we try to locate our agency with clothing and style, and when we feel and don't feel 'fashionable'. Its a rollick of an episode through everything that felt too hush-hush even five years ago.
Listen to us, and tell us what you think! Write to us at [email protected] with thots, memes and everything in the middle. -
Is being a supermom a compliment or just an indictment of structures that have let us down?
Charvi - a dear friend and doting mother - sheds her therapist hat to joins us this week on an honest, vulnerable episode about motherhood - how it's shaped us, and how we are trying to shape it. Whether we have chosen or not to have children, we realise there are similar threads of guilt, de-pedestaling and reclamation that frame all of our journeys with the idea of motherhood. We try to disentangle the places where motherhood, womanhood and 'perfect families' intersect, trying to simultaneously break down our own myths of the women that 'have it all'. Our own experiences of loss, forming kinships of choice, and navigating the question of 'when is the next one due?' shape what is hopefully a conversation starter about all the not-so-glamorous parts about motherhood and the non-binary nature of 'will I have a child?'
Write to us at [email protected] with your own thoughts, feelings, or just plain memes. They are all received with glee and gratefulness. -
'Sometimes I think I am not Muslim enough for my family, and not Indian enough for this country'
Nisrin brings vulnerability and a quiet power to this overdue conversation as she takes us through how she has navigated her identity as a Muslim woman in a world constantly seeking to remind her that she doesn't belong. From being an 11-year-old during the Godhra riots, to being a 16-year-old exchange student in post-9/11 America, to the trappings of corporate workspaces in Gujarat - she breaks down, with heartbreaking candor, what it feels like to move through a world that doesn't account for you. We also take different vantage points to similar events, examining what it means to be a part of the majority - how that shapes you, and the arrogance of the 'big picture' conversation.
इंसान अपनी ही प्रजाति को अल्पसंख्यक घोषित करने की अद्भुत कला रखते हैं। जब हर मौके पर और हर प्रकार से याद दिलाया जाए की आप हमारे नहीं हैं - हमारे जैसे नहीं है। यह कुछ आपके जन्म से ही तय किया जा चुका है और कुछ आपके रहन सहन, विचारों और निर्णयों से तय किया जाएगा। तो फिर कैसा होता है अल्पसंख्यक हो कर जीना?हर समय कमतर होने के एहसास के साथ पहचाने चेहरों के बीच किसी अनजान डर से घिरे रहना? और इन सब के बीच कहीं नई पहचान बनाने की कोशिश। कई सारे झकझोर देने वाले अनुभव और कठिन सवालों से भरा ये एपिसोड निसरीन के नाम। -
Why are feminists always so angry?
With the incredible Evanne in our corner this week, we shake off our midseason break with an episode and a topic we have all been dying to talking about: anger. In the muddled, interchangeable societally endowed labels of passion, aggression, violence, and rage, we start to locate our histories with anger, and how we have come to a place of acceptance and reclamation when it comes to the 'angry woman' tag. We speak about what safe, caring, collective spaces of anger feel like, how completely ridiculous it is to equate the anger of the oppressed and the oppressor, and how states and corporations are weaponising anger. It is, it should go without saying by now, an episode that contains every feeling other than the one we're carefully dissecting.
We end with what is probably the most delightful story of how Evanne found her way to the podcast. Listen in and write to us with what you think. :) -
What have your favourite episodes been?
How do I start my own podcast?
Following an intense mapping of our podcasting journey in part one, the second part of the mid-season episode tackles a super fun rapid fire sent in by one of the listeners. We spar, we pick favourites (but not really), and we bask in the reflected awesomeness of our guests. We also pick our most memorable moments across this journey, somewhere finding a beat to reflect on why podcasting felt like such an out-of-body experience to begin with. We also tell you about all the hardware and software we use and the expenses of running a podcast.
So first time listeners and podcasters, this might be just the introduction you need. To our podcast and to the podcasting world in general!
पार्ट-२ तक पहुंचने के लिए बधाइयां!! :) अब कुछ चटपटे सवालों का जवाब सुनिए! हमारी एक श्रोता ने हमें कुछ मजेदार रैपिड फायर प्रश्न दिए हैं और हमने पूरी कोशिश की है ईमानदारी से उनका जवाब देने की! परदे के पीछे के किस्से, कुछ यादगार पल और कुछ भविष्यवाणियां। अगर आप अपना पॉडकास्ट शुरू करना चाहते हैं तो जरूर से सुनिएगा सिर्फ टेक्निकल जानकारी के लिए नहीं, पॉडकास्टिंग की रूह को समझने के लिए भी। और कुछ नए सवाल या विचार हों तो हमें जरूर लिख कर भेजिएगा :)
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Is Fursat Feminism a full-time job? How has it impacted our feminism and our friendship?
We are officially halfway through the first season! And it feels as good a time as any to be taking stock of the wild, unexpected, and joyful journey this podcast has been. In our first hosts-only episode since the intro, we reflect on how little we knew when we were recording that first episode, and what a whirlwind we have been riding ever since. In answering some of your incredibly well thought-through questions, we gush about each other and the community we have all created, and reflect on what's been most surprising and shocking about the process of podcasting. It's a conversation we wish we had been privy to before starting our own podcast.
... And it's only a warm-up to a revved up part 2! Join us for both (look for the easter eggs!) and feel free to write to us at [email protected]
पार्ट - १ हेलो नमस्ते आदाब के पीछे की कहानी क्या है? पॉडकास्ट का आइडिया किसका था? हमारे सबसे प्रिय गेस्ट कौन हैं और कौन हैं जिनकी नाक में हमने दम kr diya है? अपने रिश्ते को समझते समझते किस तरह हम इस पॉडकास्ट तक आ पहुंचे उस सफर की कुछ झलकियां लिए आए हैं हम। पिछले ६ महीनों में हमारी दुनिया कई मायनों में बदल गई कई सारे नए रिश्ते बन गए, कई सारे राज खुल गए और एक प्रकार का कायापलट भी हुआ है हमारा। तो हमने सोचा क्यूं ना रुक कर एक पल को थोड़ा जायज़ा लिया जाए - अपने फुरसत भरे पलों का? तो बस फुरसत से बैठ हमने दिल खोल कर बातें की और चुन कर कुछ किस्से आपके लिए लाएं हैं - आपके होस्ट दीपा और अरुंधती। एक एपिसोड हमारी दोस्ती/रिश्ते के नाम !!!तो ध्यान से सुनिएगा! :)
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What is so revolutionary about having a room of one's own?
"A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction." We ride Virginia Woolfe's words from 1929 through an episode about building spaces of our own, of occupying, of learning, of joy, of creativity, of being free and of becoming persons of our choice in rooms of our own. Amrisha joins us to share the literal and metaphorical manifestations of shaping and stealing spaces of her own, even as we all explore how the words from Woolfe's original text bled into our lives in different stages, and also the ways in which they come up short. It is a gentle, lovely episode of peeling back layers on physical space as it sits with our experience of womanhood. Do listen, engage, and let us know what it takes for you to have a room of your own.एक बीन बाग, कुछ किताबें, कुछ संगीत, एक योगा मेट, कुछ झिल्ली से कपड़े और अपना कमरा- आहा!! फ़ुरसत से बैठ चाय की चुसकियाँ लेते हम इस एपिसोड मे कुछ सपने बुन आए अमृषा के संग। वर्जीनिया वूलफ की किताब 'अ रूम ऑफ वंस ओन' से प्रेरित हो कर हमने बयां किए हैं अपने कुछ रंगीन सपने हमारे कमरों के; अपनी मालिकी और अपनी जुटाई हुई मनपसंद वस्तु- सामग्रियों, घरों, कमरों के बारे में। आज़ाद रहने के लिए जरूरी है कि दावे के साथ अपनी जगह बनाई जाए- और उन्ही जगहों की चर्चा मे हमारे साथ जुड़िये और अपनी भी कहानिया हमे भेजिए :) हमे इंतज़ार रहेगा।
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Does leading a feminist space make you a feminist boss? And vice versa?
We have all come a long way in becoming feminists and our workspaces have played a crucial role in this evolution. In this episode, Anamika joins us with her candor and dry wit as we deep dive into the world of feminist and women led NGOs, reflecting on the experience of leading and being led by people we admire. We speak about the expectations of martyrdom that accompany so many jobs in this sector, and the cult of the leader that often obfuscates the permission to make mistakes. This conversation is also intended to somewhat break down the cultures of silence around some of these sticky topics, the discomfort of 'calling out one's own', and how the movement at large might benefit from constantly examining our own feminism.
नारीवाद की लहर में कदम रखते ही आदतन हम नए एहसासों में गुम हो जाते हैं फिर आँखें खुलती हैं, रूमानी परदे हटते हैं तो दिखता है कि इन लहरों में तो कई मछलियाँ छूट रहीं हैं कई गोते जबरदस्ती लगाने पड़ रहे हैं ! हम बिल्कुल अकेले ही तैरे जा रहे हैं! इस एपिसोड में हमारे साथ अनामिका ने काफ़ी लंबी बातें करीं- नारीवादी 'बॉस' के बारे में, नारीवादी संस्थाओ और संगठनों के बारे में, नेतृत्व के कई पहलुओं के बारे में। बदलाव लाने की होड़ में हम कितने दीवाल खड़े कर रहें उनपर थोड़ी ठहर कर चर्चा की हमने और कोशिश ये की है कि सामान्यतः जिन सवालों से हम अकेले जूझ रहे हैं उन्हे थोड़ा बल मिले और अपने कूपों से निकल कर हम उनसे प्रश्न भी पूछ सकें जिन्होंने शायद हमें नारीवादी बनना सिखाया है। आप भी हमें अपने नारीवादी 'बॉसेस' की कहानिया लिख सकते हैं हमारे ईमेल id [email protected] पर ! -
Would a camera in any other hand be just as powerful?
In our first Gujarati episode of the podcast, our friend and former colleague Kailash joins us to share her incredible story of getting to be a filmmaker, story teller and narrative weaver against the worst odds. It is filled with delightful anecdotes of navigating new worlds, etching an identity in a society that refuses to see you, and reclaiming space. Within it is etched the lovely story of how she and Arundhati became friends, and how they - together with Deepa - tried to recreate some of the magical subversion of power that can happen when young women use cameras to tell stories.
અમારા નવા એપિસોડમાં અમારી ખાસ બેનપણી કૈલાશ અમારી સાથે એના કેમેરા સાથે ના પ્રેરક સફર ની વાત કરવા જોડાઈ. કેમેરો હાથમાં આવવાથી તેનુ જીવન કઈ રીતે બદલ્યું, તેણે કેમેરા પાછળ રહીને કયા પ્રકાર ની દુનિયા જોઈ, અને છોકરીઓના હાથમાં કેમેરા આવવાથી સામાજિક સત્તા ના ઢાંચા કઈ રીતે બદલાઈ જાય છે - આ તમામ બાબતો સાથે હસતા - રમતા સમય ક્યાં નીકળી ગયો તેનો ખ્યાલ જ ના રહ્યો. આવો, તમે પણ સાંભળો! - Show more
