Episodes
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Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
Okay, I know you're expecting a lot of jokes about the fact that they cast Jake Gyllenhaal to play a Persian prince. But what you're not expecting is snake-based martial arts! -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within was a technical landmark and set a new standard for what animation could do back in 2001. It's also a weird, slow mess that almost killed Squaresoft with a big, glowing jellyfish. Is it good, though? -
Missing episodes?
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Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
We all knew it would happen eventually. The Aliens are versusing the Predators. And in the exact place you would expect to find these two space monsters: a pyramid under Antarctica. Lance Hendrickson is there, too. -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
Uwe Boll's adaptation of Alone in the Dark features a bunch of army guys for some reason. And Edward Carnby, played by Christian Slater, lives in a warehouse with a canopy bed in the center of it. It's still not the worst product associated with the franchise, not by a long shot. -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
Tekken, the live action film from 2010, is an incredibly dour and joyless adaptation of a game where a demon-man fights karate robots in order to take control of a corporation. This movie doesn't feature robots or demons or even any pandas, but it does have Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa as Heihachi so that's fun! -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
This time, it's Hitman, a movie the lead actor has openly referred to as a personal low-point. It features a hilarious sword fight and honestly not much else. But it is, technically, a motion picture! -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
This time we discuss Silent Hill: Revelations 3D Third Strike Xrd 2nd GIG. The second Silent Hill movie is a very very loose adaption of the third Silent Hill game made by people who think Heather should've hooked up with Vincent. -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
This time, we talk about the film version of Double Dragon which shifts Billy and Jimmy's adventures to the post apocalypse and also there's a magic amulet for some reason? -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
This time, we get our butts to Mars where Karl Urban and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson get up to some very Resident Evil style antics. But the movie's called Doom. -
Secret Theater was a Patreon side show we did covering film adaptations of our favorite (and not-so-favorite) video games. Since the Patreon and the show are on hiatus, the show became unavailable. We decided to upload them and hope you enjoy us talking about goofy movies.
First up, Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil! A total mess that ended up spawning a massive series of sequels. Hey, that sounds familiar... -
The boys take a trip to a place that is definitely not Spain at all to talk about one of the most lauded games of all time: 4 Resident Evil!
Leon S. Kennedy is back, a newly minted agent of the United States Secret Service. His mission: rescue the president's daughter who has been kidnapped by a backwoods cult. His method: kicking. And because this is a Resident Evil game, there's monsters and mutants and even a mine cart!
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
AKA Red Dead Robot-tion
We continue trying to unravel the onion that is Xenogears. Our search for answers has led us to...Catholic cowboys? In this episode, we meed the best side character in the game, shoot up a ghost ship, uncover a centuries old conspiracy and discover a lost city of wonders. All while the main character is in a coma! This game is pretty wild, gang.
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
A lot of stuff happened last year. But also a bunch of video games came out! We take our annual look back at the highs and lows we had in the past 12 months. In gaming, anyway. Only gaming. We talk about good tunes, dastardly mysteries and big, big boys!
Also, Jared tries to make a joke about current events but reveals he only reads like half a headline and assumes he got the gist.
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
aka Stier Automata
Our Xenogears saga continues! In jail! Fei Fong Wong wakes up after the battle for Aveh to a mix of good and bad news. Good news: he's alive. Bad news: he's a prisoner of the Kislev Empire. Luckily, the Nortune prison runs on a fighting tournament based economy, so Fei has an edge.
Meeting Rico Banderas, who definitely does not infringe on any copyrights whatsoever, Fei gets caught up in the investigation of a string of brutal killings. Can he solve the case AND become king of the ring? Why is Citan there? Who is that Wiseman guy anyway? And hey, what's the Purge thing those Geblers keep talking about?
All these mysteries and more in Xenogears Act 2!
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
At long last, we embark on a saga. A saga of kung fu, robots, and divinity. A saga known as Xenogears.
In this first part of our journey through the 1998 cult classic, we meet our hero Fei Fong Wong. He has a problem: robot violence. Also amnesia, but the robot violence is the main thing. Caught up in the middle of a centuries long war, Fei suffers from the loss of his home and crushing guilt at his role in its destruction. But whatever because Bart the Pirate King has a corrupt regime to topple, so Fei has more robo-battling ahead of him.
Through it all, we are confronted by the ultimate question: Dost thou desire The Power?
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
The most requested game we've ever had, it is finally time to face the legendary Sonic '06!
In this reboot(?), Sonic intervenes in Eggman's evil schemes yet again and rescues the Princess of the bizarre nation of Soleanna. While he pursues whatever his dark designs are, Sonic is pursued by a mysterious time traveler seeking to save a blighted future. Meanwhile, Shadow the Hedgehog has no time for all this nonsense and nearly resolves the narrative all by himself in his desperate scramble to get out of this game. And poor old Eggman falls off the wagon.
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
Listener Requests continue to deliver great games as we take a look at the now legendary Metal Gear Solid 2!
Two years after the Shadow Moses Incident, Solid Snake and Otacon have dedicated themselves to freeing the world from the increased proliferation of the bipedal mechanical weapons known as Metal Gear. Infiltrating a covert Marines vessel, Snake finds himself facing off against a new threat and familiar old foes when
RAIDEN! CLOSE THE PODCAST APP NOW! I NEED SCISSORS! 61!
Ahem. But also support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
In this jumbo sized first entry in this year's Listener Request Summer, the boys take a pilgrimage to the temple of sports in Final Fantasy X!
Tidus Jechtson has it all: a promising sports career, a luxury house boat, loving fans and a dead father. But his cushy life gets turned upside down when his wacky uncle Auron sends him on a trip of a lifetime. Oh, and also an eldritch monstrosity destroys civilization, sending Tidus hurtling one thousand years into the future. But Tidus is about to find out that no matter when or where you are, there's only one thing that's ever truly important:
Blitzball. Wait, I mean love. I guess this game is about love. Blitzball, though...
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber -
Due to popular(?) demand, this bonus version of our episode on Hopkins FBI is a little different.
Please note that overexposure to "I Can't Control Myself" by the Troggs is potentially hazardous. The science is not yet in, but the FDA advises extreme caution. HBGC does not accept responsibility for any mental or physical damages caused by prolonged bopping. Listen at your own risk. -
In this episode, the boys tackle the infamous cult classic adventure game Hopkins FBI!
In a world made entirely of edgelords, one man stands for justice. I don't know who that man is, because it is not Agent Hopkins. Hopkins is a highly decorated FBI agent who squares off against the worst of the worst and occasionally wins. He "foils" a bank robbery only to have his life turned upside down by the return of his arch-nemesis, Bernie Berkson. Hopkins will wade through a sea of dead women on his quest to save his girlfriend and the world.
One thing he will not do, however, is react to anything like a human being would.
Support the show at https://www.patreon.com/HyperbolicGameChamber - Show more
