Episodes
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Welcome back! In this episode, Max discusses their experience growing up in CS, working at Adventure Unlimited, battling mental health issues as a teen and coming out as queer in the CS community
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Licensed clinical social worker and ex-Christian Scientist Cara returns for part two of The Mental Health episode. In this episode, Cara does a live grounding demonstration you can do at home, and answers more of your mental health questions. See below for resources.Here are some topics covered:2:00 - what is the anxiety/CS connection?6:00 - a 20 minute-ish grounding demonstration (feel free to join in)31:00 - how is distracting yourself from negative thoughts or feelings different from suppressing them in CS?42:00 - what is the difference between toxic positivity and good positivity?52:00 - forgiveness - is it necessary? And how to just let things go1:02:00 - what is narcissism? Can CS make you a narcissist?1:13:00 - what is the connection between anhedonia (inability to experience joy) and CS, and how can you get back your "lust for life"?1:21:00 - if you were raised by people with mental health issues, how do you know that what you're experiencing is your mental health issues or theirs?1:34:00 - trigger words from CS, and how to take away their power1:38:00 - how do you process the sickness and/or deaths of loved ones who might have been helped had they not been CS?1:49:00 - how to explain CS to your therapist1:58:00 - what is it about CS that makes it difficult or impossible to process something that's wrong?2:01:00 - 12 Step programs, can they help?2:08:00 - having you own back - a final self soothing toolHere is Cara's list of resources:An article on the genetic vs. environmental effects on mental health: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/wps.21034Here's a link to a "feelings wheel" to help you identify those pesky emotions: https://feelingswheel.com/
Mental health book list for ex CS by topic:Pete Walker The Tao Of Fully Feeling: Harvesting Forgiveness Out of Blame
Understanding shame and moving toward self-compassion
BrenĂ© Brown, PhD, MSW I Thought it Was Just Me (But it Isnât): Making the Journey from
âWhat Will People Think?â to âI Am Enoughâ
Brené Brown PhD, MSW The Gifts of Imperfection: Your Guide to a Wholehearted Life
Kristin Neff, PhD Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself
Kristin Neff, PhD & Christopher Germer, PhD The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A
Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive
Addressing CPTSD
Arielle Schwartz, PhD The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to Regaining
Emotional Control & Becoming Whole
Pete Walker, MA, LMFT Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving
Emotional Intelligence/Maturity
Brené Brown, PhD, MSW Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the
Language of Human Experience
Lindsay Gibson, PsyD Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from
Distant, Rejecting, or Self-involved Parents
Workbooks/Self-Help
Arielle Schwartz (see above)
Patricia Resick, PhD et al Getting Unstuck from PTSD: Using Cognitive Processing Therapy to
Guide Your Recovery
Nedra Tawwab Set Boundaries, Find Peace and The Set Boundaries Workbook
Sonya Renée Taylor The Body is Not an Apology and Your Body is Not an Apology Workbook
Francine Shapiro, PhD Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help
Techniques from EMDR Therapy
Karyl McBride, PhD Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic
Mothers
KC Davis, LPC How to Keep House While Drowning
Amir Levine, MD and Rachel Heller, MA Attached. The New Science of Adult Attachment and
How it Can Help You FindâAnd KeepâLove
Gary Bishop Unf*ck Yourself
Megan Boardman, LCSW The EMDR Workbook for Trauma and PTSD
Matthew McKay, PhD et al The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook
Leaving Religion
Marlene Winnell, PhD Leaving the Fold
Daniel Dennett, PhD Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon
Memoirs
Stephanie Foo What my Bones Know
Jennette McCurdy Iâm Glad my Mom Died
About Therapy and Therapists
Jeffrey Kottler, PhD On Being a Therapist
Lori Gottlieb, LMFT Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
Communication Skills
Marshall Rosenberg Nonviolent Communication
Sharon and Gordon Bower Asserting Yourself: A Practical Guide for Positive Change -
Missing episodes?
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Licensed social worker and former guest Cara returns to answer some questions about mental health posted in our ex-CS Facebook group.Here are some topics covered in this part 1:2:00 - different types of therapists23:00 - therapists vs coaches29:00 - the code of ethics that therapists maintain39:00 - different types of therapy44:00 - an explanation of EMDR59:00 - PTSD and CPTSD1:23:00 - help for attachment issues - internal family systems, somatic therapy, DBT, CBT, CPT and mindfulness1:41:00 - where to startHere is Cara's list of resources:Mental health book list for ex CS by topicUnderstanding shame and moving toward self-compassionBrenĂ© Brown, PhD, MSW I Thought it Was Just Me (But it Isnât): Making the Journey fromâWhat Will People Think?â to âI Am EnoughâBrenĂ© Brown PhD, MSW The Gifts of Imperfection: Your Guide to a Wholehearted LifeKristin Neff, PhD Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to YourselfKristin Neff, PhD & Christopher Germer, PhD The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: AProven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and ThriveAddressing CPTSDArielle Schwartz, PhD The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to RegainingEmotional Control & Becoming WholePete Walker, MA, LMFT Complex PTSD: From Surviving to ThrivingEmotional Intelligence/MaturityBrenĂ© Brown, PhD, MSW Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and theLanguage of Human ExperienceLindsay Gibson, PsyD Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal fromDistant, Rejecting, or Self-involved ParentsWorkbooks/Self-HelpArielle Schwartz (see above)Patricia Resick, PhD et al Getting Unstuck from PTSD: Using Cognitive Processing Therapy toGuide Your RecoveryNedra Tawwab Set Boundaries, Find Peace and The Set Boundaries WorkbookSonya RenĂ©e Taylor The Body is Not an Apology and Your Body is Not an Apology WorkbookFrancine Shapiro, PhD Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-HelpTechniques from EMDR TherapyKaryl McBride, PhD Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of NarcissisticMothersKC Davis, LPC How to Keep House While DrowningAmir Levine, MD and Rachel Heller, MA Attached. The New Science of Adult Attachment andHow it Can Help You FindâAnd KeepâLoveGary Bishop Unf*ck YourselfMegan Boardman, LCSW The EMDR Workbook for Trauma and PTSDMatthew McKay, PhD et al The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills WorkbookLeaving ReligionMarlene Winnell, PhD Leaving the FoldDaniel Dennett, PhD Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural PhenomenonMemoirsStephanie Foo What my Bones KnowJennette McCurdy Iâm Glad my Mom DiedAbout Therapy and TherapistsJeffrey Kottler, PhD On Being a TherapistLori Gottlieb, LMFT Maybe You Should Talk to SomeoneCommunication SkillsMarshall Rosenberg Nonviolent CommunicationSharon and Gordon Bower Asserting Yourself: A Practical Guide for Positive Change
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In this episode, Sheri discusses childhood ailments and accidents that, left untreated, led to issues later in life, and walking the fine line of maintaining relationships with loved ones still in CS after leaving.The book Sheri references is The Life of Mary Baker G. Eddy and the History of Christian Science by Georgia Milmine
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Sarah discusses navigating her mother's medical issues and cognitive dissonance, plus battling her own perfectionism as a result of growing up in CS
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In this bonus episode, I compare and contrast the experience of growing up in a religious community and belief, and subsequently leaving it, with ex-LDS (Mormon) Paul
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Barbara discusses her boundary-pushing mother, dental trauma, finding empathy for her parents and their own childhood traumas, and finally finding her way out of CS. Below are some resources Barbara would like to share that were helpful to her:
Books:
Mothers Who Canât Love: A Healing Guide for Daughters by Susan Forward
âą Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism by Amanda Montell
âą Cure: A Journey into the Science of Mind over Body by Jo Marchand
âą Bright-Sided: How Positive Thinking is Undermining America by Barbara Ehrenreich
âą Childhood Disrupted: How Your Biography Becomes Your Biology and How You Can Heal by Donna
Jackson Nakazawa (and her IG)
âą How Doctors Think by Jerome Groopman, MD
âą Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed,
Misdiagnosed, and Sick by Maya Dusenberry
âą All three books by Dr. Jen Gunter - The Vagina Bible, Menopause Manifesto, and Blood (and her
Substack and IG)
Podcasts:
Unbiased Science (also a FB page)
Science VS
America Dissected
Emancipate Your Mind
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Wendy discusses leaving Christian Science physically but not mentally early on in life, and finding her way out later with the help of a career in massage therapy and embracing science
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David discusses growing up in CS with a struggling single dad, experiences at Principia and Adventure Unlimited that made him question, and finding therapy later in life that helped him put the pieces together
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In this episode, Joseph discusses his difficult family dynamics, life atPrin, and finding his way to a more authentic self with the help of therapy and independent study
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Emi discusses growing up in a dysfunctional Christian Science home, finding a very non-CS career path, and recovering from narcissistic abuseHere are some book recommendations mentioned in this episode:No Bad Parts by Richard C. Schwartz https://www.audible.com/pd/B09GKYDGZQ?source_code=ASSOR150021921000VHealing Trauma by Peter A. Levine on Audible. https://www.audible.com/pd/B002V5BMPE?source_code=ASSOR150021921000VSomatic Internal Family Systems Therapy by Susan McConnell https://www.audible.com/pd/1623176832?source_code=ASSOR150021921000VAdult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD https://www.audible.com/pd/B01F2M2GDO?source_code=ASSOR150021921000VEmi would also like to extend a welcome to anyone who wants to reach out either to her Facebook profile, Emi Lindlee, or her email, [email protected]
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Todd talks about his Christian Science youth, navigating a narcissistic relationship, and finding help through learning about psychology and attending support groups
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From time to time I'll talk with non ex-Christian Scientists as a way of seeing the similarities between these groups and the common pathways out. Today I talk with ex-Evangelical Sarah, who talks about purity culture, fear of hellfire, and balancing relationships with family still in
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This week, Emily talks about her Christian Science marriage, her mother's Christian Science death, and how pursuing the arts saved her
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Jodi talks about the process of class instruction and becoming a Christian Science practitioner, grieving her dad, and finally leaving Christian Science and belief entirely. The video freezes briefly at about 60:00 for thirty seconds; the audio is unaffected.
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Licensed social worker and ex-Christian Scientist Cara talks about the institutionalized gaslighting in CS and how this kind of belief system interrupts healthy attachments with our caregivers, forcing on us an unnatural individualism and inability to resolve conflict
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Chandler discusses how being a curious kid was the gateway to leaving belief in Christian Science, a life changing accident that set him on a different path, and how our training as "good little workers" in Christian Science has unintended consequences
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Julie talks about navigating the medical system, using logic to explain the fallacy of faith healings, and the importance of mental health care after leaving Christian Science
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In this episode, Morgan discusses navigating pain, allergies and the medical world in general after a childhood in CS, and finding our way to more healthy communal experiences without church
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In this episode I interview Elizabeth. We discuss her multi-generational CS family, what it was like to go from "all in" to out, the rocky road to medical care, and surviving a measles outbreak at the top Christian Science boarding school
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