Episodes

  • Remember in Minority Report where if you thought about murdering someone they put you in a tube? The big tube you’re in forever alongside a bunch of other guys stacked six people high. Well here at Plumbing the Death Star we think that’s probably an imperfect system. Zammit is shocked that cops could be made even lazier, Jackson tries to become the worlds worst realtor, and Duscher wants you to send him your Orgy Spotify Playlists please. So hop into a nutrient rich pool and chuck on your headphones. It’s another episode of Plumbing the Death Star, a very good podcast.


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  • It’s our lucky day! We’ve gained unique access to a cemetery where if you bury something it comes back wrong! While we struggle to find the bit Zammit comes up with a hairbrained scheme involving cheap meats and a sack, JD has a longwinded plan involving a certain gorilla and Jackson wants to get back at poachers by encouraging poaching. Sometimes dead is better and sometimes the best laid plans often go awry.


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  • Your editor's lined up the interview of a lifetime! You're gonna win that emmy but for journalists, a Pulitzer Prize? Weird to call something we give out to people that do a good job at journalism a prize like it's something you won at a carnival handed out by a clown. Anyway, forget Frost/Nixon it's you/a vampire! What an incredible get! You get to sit down and talk to some old guy who spent most of their lives as a shut in except at night. What was it like during the war vampire? What's that? Spent it asleep? Oh how interesting. Want me to describe the sun for you? Christ you suck. The next time your editor asks you to go interview a vampire, be firm in your response and say "no. I do not want to." It'll be the best thing you ever do. Also JD gets distracted by a van in this episode. Like a dog.


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  • It’s my three dads as three dads do their best to raise a demon baby! You see, these three dads don’t have a kid and this here demon kid doesn’t have three dads! It truely is a match made in heaven. Well actually hell. Or more practically Italy we think? JD takes us through the plot of Omen while Zammit get m-pregged and Jackson gets caught up in a Diet Coke baby scandal. Who knew raising a baby with bad vibes would be so hard for three hapless dads?


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  • Hey, never say Plumbing the Death Star never did anything for you. Best Man PJ asked Plumbing the Death Star for a shoutout for his mates Tom’s wedding and they went and did a whole episode instead. A wedding themed episode, no less. Jackson asks Professor X to be his best person and crosses some personal boundaries, Zammit opts for Superman and, uh, yeah, we’d like it if he’d get our Step Mum back from Space, and Duscher chooses Remy the Rat, forgetting the powers of Remy the Rat and ruining his whole wedding. It’s a matrimonial spectacular, congratulations, you look radiant in that dress and oh so handsome in that suit, look at you two go.


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  • Plumbing the Death Star Live at the Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival! Grab Tickets! Click this whole sentence! KYLOREN! 10% off!


    If you're in Melbourne, we're performing tonight at Stupid Old Studios at 8:30pm BUT you can also stream the show if you live elsewhere! And if you can't watch it live, have you considered VODing it?? You can also VOD it if you're in Melbourne but don't want to travel to Brunswick, that's okay too. Use coupon code KYLOREN at checkout for 10% off the ticket and then, if you're coming tonight, and of course you are, use those savings and get yourself a sneaky late night kebab or felafel? That's what I'm going to be doing tonight, because I've been good.


    If you're in Melbourne next week, on Wednesday the 9th, myself (Zammit) and probably Jackson will be at Fortress (the Melbourne one) to be showcasing our board game Jarren's Outpost from 6pm as part of a board game developers night AND if you're still in Melbourne for PAX, we're going to be doing a live D&D is for Nerds show on Saturday October 12th at 1pm at the Owlbear theatre! We're gonna be cats.


    Anyways, tonight though - Stupid Old Studios - 8:30pm - KYLOREN for 10% off.


    xx o


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  • Peter Parker you're not a good boyfriend. You never puts MJ first, you're always missing her plays or other events that are important to her. We understand your uncle's car crash gave you powers or whatever and because of that you stop crime as Car Uncle Man but Peter, you can't predict the future and we're fairly sure your Car Uncle, Cuncle Ben, wouldn't have wanted you to stop that car that killed him. He'd be worried that you might injure yourself, or worse, get turned into a car, like how your uncle did before he died and told you about powers and responsibility or something we think? All we're trying to say is that you're always leaving, and from the distance, the suit you're always wearing is just one giant red flag. Go to therapy, get a pager, communicate more, be flexible with your time and for once in your life, maybe put MJs needs above a strangers?


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    Come see us at the Cheerful Earful Podcast Fest, both live AND streaming!


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  • Oasis is getting back together to the surprise of pretty much everyone, prompting Plumbing the Death Star to ask: hey what exactly is a wonderwall anyway? Why would someone be one? And what does it have to do with the classic Pixar Cars franchise? Duscher has some strong opinions on the game of Downball, Zammit theorises about an invisible wall that is also Car Heaven, and Jackson remembers the movie Drop Dead Fred. It’s a question for the age that even the Gallagher Brothers are unable to answer in any concrete way.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    Come see us at the Cheerful Earful Podcast Fest, both live AND streaming!


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  • Things are off to a bad start when Zammit wants to de-voice himself and JD wraps himself in a blanket before landing on 'being on a boat' would be the best way to survive a Quiet Place. However, now what? They don't know how to fish, discussion of desalination only leads to yelling which is the one thing they really shouldn't do. The boys argue about magnetic south, try to eat fish bones and fail to catch seagulls (for its hydrating blood) before a quick divergence into JFK young juice conspiracies and qanon's interesting theories about that one bad day in Dallas. Either way, how bad can salt water really be?


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham if they're not sold out.


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  • Recorded live at the Comedy Republic in Melbourne on August 22nd 2024, the boys dared to ask Which Fictional Child Would Be the Best to Step-Dad? Zammit is going to be a father soon and the other two will also be there so what better way to test their fathering mettle with their approach to fatherhood with fictional children? You need to ask yourself, who did it best (or the least worst) as general parenting, the birds and the bees, athletic prowess and how well we get on with other kid's dads are all taken into consideration when raising these children that are now under our care. Zammit is worred he won't be able to keep up with a man-cub, JD wants to be praised for looking after a reverso-boy and Jackson has to explain to a rat the dangers of stealing. It ain't easy being a step-dad but at least the courts will have premo evidence when Zammit's kid gets taken off him.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • Puberty is never good. It's even worse when your teeth are little guys, you can explode exactly one (1) time or Wolverine is there to welcome you into the X-Men while you wait in a cave. Today the clever geniuses at Plumbing the Death Star are asking what the worst mutant ability to awaken with. Zammit wants us all to have big thinks or be pig warmers, Jackson experiences a very bad morning before getting a great pair of sunglasses but JD goes and ruins it for everyone. From having the sensation of pie to experience a haircut you're not having to orifices dialatingon their own. All we know is that when JD's power awakens you better pray to whatever god you believe in that you just happen to be sitting down when he is.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • This is pop culture. We swear. Springsteen wrote a song (and a book) so it counts! Outlaw Pete is about a bank-robbing baby whose exploits become a meditation on sin, fate, and free will. Springsteen himself said it’s essentially the story of a man trying to outlive and outlast his sins! Now the sin is robbing a bank and the man is a baby but it still counts! But we here at Plumbing the Death Star ain’t gonna spend any time on that, we’re here today to discuss how you’d rob a bank using the powers of a baby. And not just any baby, a baby that is at most 3 months old. Zero object permanence, no knee caps and a weak fontanelle are just a few of the things in our arsenal to rob a hank. You might be thinking that such a task is impossible and we’re here to tell you that yes, not being able to speak, hold your own neck up or even have man-thoughts are definitely hurdles. But never underestimate the nature of man, or in this case baby, and our willingness to overcome any obstacle put in our way.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • Sure Charlie Bucket got the factory because everyone else failed quicker, but was that the best move by Wonka? Running a business is hard work. Running a questionable legal chocolate manufacturing business with multiple scandals involving workers rights, fair pay and strange and unique injuries to guests is possibly harder. We don’t think Charlie has it in him to bribe officials or squash any dissenting opinions about unions. His amoral failings will be the death of Wonka chocolate and Augustus Gloop will have died for nothing. At least under the ruthless eye of one of the other children, Gloop’s legacy will live on. But more importantly Wonka’s legacy will live on. Sure it might be Wonka-Salt now, but the chocolate’s so good you’ll die for it. Just ask Augustus. You can’t. Because he’s a dead little boy. Due to woeful safety regulations at the chocolate factory. But you know he’d say it and mean every word.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in Melbourne or the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • In Pokemon-realm there’s only three things to do: fight, breed or sell bicycle and the Plumbing Boys are all out of Pokemon. There might also be beauty show? We’re unclear if that’s true. There’s a lot of horse kick math from the leading experts of getting kicked in the head (by horse) that results in a very bad day at the circus and realising that a lot of animals struggle against rock, hate being on fire and cannot body electricity. Jackson chooses sell bicycle and picks snake in a very simple 3 or 4 step plan to make a million dollars that mostly involves shaking down a kid and then faking getting really sick. JD gets on his soapbox about dog shows and Zammit just wants to think about bears. It’s a lot of thinks about animals this week but there’s one thing we cannot deny, a cassowary is god’s most sinful creation


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in Melbourne or the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • It’s 1990 somethings! A truly blissful time when the internet didn’t exist, everyone was still recovering from the 80s, tying a flannelette shirt around your waist was the pinnacle of fashion and you had to buy your music from an actual record store. But you didn’t want to buy your music from some kind of bland corporate mega corp like Music Town. You want to go somewhere hip and radical like Empire Records! Where the staff can get away with stealing a large amount of money, have Rex Manning slam your cheeks in the copy room and you can perform your next big hit ‘Sugar High’ on the rooftop. Like a Beatle! Sure it’s not all good times. You might hallucinate Gwar sacrificing you on stage and your boss might hit you, but at least he didn’t turn you into the cops. See, it’s all swings and roundabouts! Empire Records, now accepting job applications by gun point and they’re open ‘til midnight.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in Melbourne or the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham.


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  • TheDamBeaver wants us to answer How We’d Steal the Moon. We assume it’s to do with Despicable Me’s very own Gru, but we can’t be sure. JD wants to make everything big, Zammit takes a leaf from paper, scissors, rock and Jackson figures it out. So let’s all go get a small loan from the Bank of Evil, feed our satan horse only the finest cuts of clown meat and pray that we never find out the earth is ending until the last possible moment. Or a three day weekend. Either or.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in Melbourne or the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham


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  • Gustavo wants to know How Would the World React if God Killed Spider-Man as per Eddie Brock's Wishes in Spider-Man 3 and thinks we're the right people for the job. And they're right! As soon as Eddie clasps his hands together and calls God 'sir' he's going to hear the loudest boom anyone has ever heard accompanied by an angelic hymn as the body of Peter Parker slaps the stone tiles in front of him, head first. With Peter smoted, most likely unrecognisable as his body turns to ash from being hit with holy light, a lot of questions arise. Since both Peter Parker and Spider-Man are suspiciously missing will anyone connect the dots? How long will New York take before they notice the webslinger is not stopping crime? Will any super-villain cash in and try to take credit for the death of Spider-Man? We're here today to say yes, yes they will and it will be from the villain you suspected the least. Either way, if God's granting out smite wishes it probably best to be off anyone's radar as it will be a very dangerous, albeit short, time to be alive.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


    If you’re in Melbourne or the UK and want to see three beautiful idiots live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see us in Melbourne, London, Edinburgh, Manchester and/or Birmingham


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  • After last week Daddy had to go lay down, but never fear, our good friend James aka Mr Sunday Movies is here to fill in that Zammit-shaped hole to talk all things Krang! Well really one thing Krang: why’d they put him there? He’s so exposed to one swift punch to the bread-basket! Krang can’t look anyone in the eyes and is the perfect height for crop dusting. Surely there’s a better place to put Krang in a robot body? Either way we can all agree that Krang looks so fun to punt, throw off a cliff or cook like a haggis. We don’t know much but we do know we want to wreck Krang’s day.


    You can find James on the Weekly Planet Podcast or on his YouTube channel Mr Sunday Movies.


    If you’re in the UK and want to see these three beautiful boys live and in the flesh, head on over to https://www.sanspantsradio.com/events/category/live-shows/ and grab your tickets today to see them in London, Edinburgh and/or Manchester. Birmingham show TBA!


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  • We’re joined by special guest and Vault-Tec employee Adam Carnevale to ask What Would Your Ideal Fallout Vault Be? In true Vault-Tec fashion, Adam comes up with some incredible vault ideas from some kind of nightmare man to a vault where everyone thinks they’re birds maybe? He even puts forward hover-cabins connected by pneumatic tubes involving snipers for some reason. But none of that matters as Zammit and Jackson are here to help his brilliant ideas come to fruition! Do you want to trick your vault dwellers into thinking they’re slightly bigger? Sure! What about a VR realm? Or an M. Night Shyamaln wonderland? We don’t know what possessed you Adam, but yes. We’ll help you build it! Because we’re good friends.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


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  • Sure, filling up that dweeb with hunk juice worked out well for everyone, but surely there were some other ideas to use all that super soldier serum? Did Stanley Tucci ever have a think “what if horse?”. The kicks alone would have powered a million propagandas! The problem there we guess is we don’t know the ideology of the horse. Plus giving it to say, war dogs who have already seen battle and suffering from incredible amounts of PTSD seems a sure fire way of making smart dogs whomst hate America. If we gave it to everyone we face the problem of maybe not everyone in America is pro-America. The only feasible solution was to make a juice that makes you weak and dumb and let that get stolen. The only problem there is three podcasters will inevitably make that juice part of their daily requirements.


    Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+


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