Episodes
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
1:50 - It's very developmentally typical for toddlers to have trouble with sharing and also there are things you can do to encourage and build this skill.
7:25 - At 2.5 years-old, kids will likely need an adult to narrate and also facilitate the sharing so they learn how it's done.
11:40 - Kids can become territorial at this age, so it can be helpful to have playdates at neutral places, like a park or a playground.
13:40 - When you see your child start to get territorial, try to see this as an indicator that they need to take a break rather than a cue to teach them the importance of sharing - that can be done later, when they are more regulated and in control.
16:47 - To build the skill of sharing, it's helpful to break this down into smaller tasks like tolerating frustration, setting healthy boundaries, and perspective taking.
19:30 - We also want to be mindful not to encourage our kids to share without any limitations or we risk them feeling compelled to become more of a people pleaser.
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOW YOU CAN PARENT YOUR DAUGHTER SO SHE DOESN’T BECOME A PEOPLE PLEASER?
Listen to the podcast episode we reference in this conversation
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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When a child is born, so too is a mother.
In this episode, we'll explore this metamorphosis and how the abrupt shift into motherhood can shatter our former identity into many different parts (and why that doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing).
Joining me is Rebecca Geshuri and Jessica Sorci, the brilliant creators behind The Mothercentric Approach, which blends Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy with maternal mental health.
Rebecca and Jessica will help listeners understand IFS and how "parts work" can be vital for mothers. By acknowledging and accepting these different parts, mothers can begin to heal and integrate them, forming a more cohesive and balanced sense of self. This integration can shift how we feel about ourselves and how we show up as parents, leading to a more compassionate and effective approach to motherhood.
LEARN MORE ABOUT THE MOTHERCENTRIC APPROACH - FOR MOMS:
https://www.mothercentric.com/for-moms
LEARN MORE ABOUT THE MOTHERCENTRIC APPROACH - FOR PRACTITIONERS:
https://www.mothercentric.com/for-practitioners
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Missing episodes?
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
2:27 - Reframe your goal from being about maintaining the specific friendships to be about maintaining the social skills your child has acquired over the school year instead.
4:13 - Using summer as your child's opportunity to get to try something new and allow them to explore different parts of themselves.
6:26 - If a child has struggled in the past, the friendships they have may feel precious and fragile now, and that can make kids and parents alike feel anxious that this might go away.
10:12 - It's helpful not to measure your child's social success based on their age and encourage them to have friends who are a year or two younger, if that they are lacking some social skills.
14:43 - Tangible tips you can implement to support your child's social skills and encourage their building and maintaining deep friendships.
19:10 - Having a plan-b with a singular person activity can be helpful for your child to have in their back pocket to play with if they struggle to join into a social group.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Reduce stress around mealtimes and help your child be more flexible with what they eat!
Joining me today is Dr. Yaara Shimshoni, a clinical psychologist and a clinical assistant professor at the Yale School of Medicine, Child Study Center.
We'll explore the complexities of Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) and its distinction from typical picky eating. Yaara will detail how this severe eating disorder impacts children's health and social lives, and offer practical strategies for parents to reduce stress around mealtimes, encourage flexibility in eating habits, and break the cycle of accommodation that often exacerbates these issues.
Plus, we'll help parents take the guiding principles of a therapy approach called SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions), and learn how to apply it with kids who are showing more normative picky eating challenges, that are not clinical, but still can be frustrating and exasperating for parents to navigate.
LEARN MORE ABOUT YAARA:
Yaara Shimshoni
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SPACE, CHECK OUT MY INTERVIEW WITH THE CREATOR, DR. ELI LEBOWITZ:
Listen to the episode
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
1:53 - What "positive parenting" really is from a psychological perspective.
4:20 - Our child's development is not always linear, it's important to consider their regulation level and other situational factors when we set our expectations of them.
5:20 - As parents, we're often more triggered when our elementary-aged and older kids exhibit "bad behaviors."
7:19 - How to have a productive conversation with your child to pregame, collaboratively problem solve, and reflect on hot moments together once they are back in a regulated state.
9:10 - For older kids, you may need more structured behavioral interventions beyond just validating emotions and reflecting their feelings back to them.
14:17 - How to tailor your parenting approach to your unique child, rather than just accepting universal parenting strategies that may not be a good fit for you and your family.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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From neurological changes during pregnancy to the demands of parenthood, we explore the science behind "mom-rage" and how mindfulness can help rewire our responses.
Here to help us explore the meaning behind anger, the difference between reactivity and responsiveness, and practical steps to navigate mom-rage with grace and understanding is Diana Winston. Diana is the Director of Mindfulness Education at UCLA's Mindful Awareness Research Center and is the author of The Little Book of Being: Practices and Guidance for Uncovering Your Natural Awareness.
Whether you're a parent struggling with anger or simply curious about the transformative potential of mindfulness, this episode offers valuable insights and practical tools for navigating the complexities of parenthood and curating a mindfulness practice amidst the chaos of daily life.
LEARN MORE ABOUT DIANA WINSTON:
https://dianawinston.com/
DOWNLOAD THE UCLA MINDFUL APP FOR FREE GUIDED MEDITATIONS:
https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ucla-mindful/id1459128935
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
3:10 - What you can be on the lookout for to alert you to the fact that you are (or aren't) properly attuning to your child.
5:10 - Strategies to help parents attune to children whose cues and signals are harder to read and understand.
9:36 - Focusing on a granular moment can lead to confusion for parents, but zooming out can help you be more accurate in your understanding of what your child needs.
13:16 - Being a "good enough" parent is not just something we must settle for, it's actually scientifically-proven to be beneficial and necessary for a child's healthy development.
16:58 - Moments of misattunements help our child learn that there will be imperfections in their interpersonal relationships, which is an important life lesson.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Are we asking the wrong questions when it comes to our kids’ screen usage? In a world where technology isn’t going away, the right questions may be less about time limits, access, and controlling their behaviors and more about how we can build a child’s internal regulation system and rewire the reward center in their brain and body that screens are designed to hijack.
Joining me to offer a paradigm shift for the way we approach technology with children is somatic educator and therapist, Alé Duarte. Alé emphasizes the importance of going beyond mere behavior management and equipping children with the tools they need to override the algorithms designed to keep them glued to their screens.
Whether you're a parent, therapist, educator, or caregiver, this episode offering you strategies for approaching technology through the lens of neuroscience and psychology is one you won't want to miss!
LEARN MORE ABOUT ALÉ DUARTE:
https://www.aleduarte.com/
RESERVE YOUR SPOT IN HIS TRAINING SERIES, SCREEN MASTERS:
Live Classes start on Thursday May 23, 2024
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
2:04 - There are many dilemmas parents often face that can be seen inside of this listener's question:
Weighing the pros and cons of whether staying at home or going to work is the best for you, your child, and your unique situation.
If you do choose to use childcare, what type is most ideal for your child.
And finally, addressing the struggles surrounding your child's potential separation anxiety.
3:58 - There is no right or wrong answer to any of these questions.
7:05 - This decision shouldn't only be about your child. It's also important to ask yourself: What is best for me?
7:58 - This decision doesn't have to be permanent - if it's feeling overwhelming, you can reframe this to be what is right for me and my family right now.
12:30 - Weighing between sending your child to daycare, bringing in a nanny, or staying home with your children.
15:06 - Even if you are a stay-at-home parent you can add in opportunities for your child to learn to trust other caregivers and to experience separations.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Our past experiences shape our present behaviors and patterns, but by working toward healing our inner child, we can make meaningful shifts!
Jennifer Nurick joins me to discuss a profound way to approach healing by integrating many treatment approaches, including attachment theory, Internal Family Systems, EMDR, somatic psychotherapy, and more.
In this episode, we explore practical strategies for healing past traumas and nurturing inner and outer secure attachments through "parts work." Plus, Jennifer shares poignant examples of how this work translates into real-life interactions, especially in the realm of parenting, where attunement and repair are crucial for overall mental health and well-being.
LEARN MORE ABOUT JENNIFER:
https://www.psychotherapycentral.health/
READ JENNIFER'S BOOK:
Heal Your Anxious Attachment: Release Past Trauma, Cultivate Secure Relationships, and Nurture a Deeper Sense of Self
INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT ATTACHMENT SCIENCE?
Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
2:25 - Awareness and acceptance of the situation is your first step.
3:30 - Whether or not your ex is a narcissist, if you don't feel your co-parent is able to properly support your child emotionally, these strategies we offer will apply for all of those situations, too.
5:54 - Finding the delicate balance between not projecting your own feelings or "bad-mouthing" your co-parent to your child, while also not white-washing your child's feelings or gaslighting them either.
8:01 - How to use reflective functioning to help empower your child to cope when they are resistant to wanting to spend time with their other parent.
13:50 - Intentionally adding in elements for fun and delight in your own interactions with your child to help create security in your relationship.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Navigating the complex terrain of youth sports while promoting positive body image and mental wellness!
Joining me is Zoë Bisbing, a psychotherapist specializing in body image and eating disorders and the creator of Body-Positive Home.
In this episode, we emphasize the importance of creating secure attachments from the start, laying a foundation of resilience that can withstand diet-culture and societal pressures. We delve into the challenges faced by children in aesthetic sports, discussing the delicate balance between encouraging our children's passion and weighing the potential risks to their physical and mental well-being.
Tune in as we explore the intersection of resilience, body positivity, and parenting, and discover practical ways to cultivate a nurturing environment where all bodies are valued and celebrated!
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
1:48 - A tantrum is a behavioral expression of emotions that feel to big to express in a productive manner.
2:25 - Tantrums typically tend to start around one-year-old and petter out by about 7.
6:37 - Try to compare your child to their own emotion regulation development and not compare them to another child.
9:37 - It's helpful to track the intensity, duration, and frequency of your child's tantrums - because our memories of these high stress times can often be flawed and being able to look at a log is very helpful.
Click here to download my FREE OBSERVATION TRACKER to help you log these behaviors over the course of a week and work to change it over the course of 3 weeks.
14:10 - The red flags you should be on the lookout for that might mean there is something abnormal with your child's tantrums.
WANT TO TAKE THIS TOPIC EVEN FURTHER? CHECK OUT THESE BOOKS, PRODUCTS, AND RESOURCES:
HELPFUL BOOKS:
The Tantrum Survival Guide: Tune In to Your Toddler's Mind (and Your Own) to Calm the Craziness and Make Family Fun Again by Rebecca Schrag Hershberg, PhD Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids by Mona Delahooke, PhD Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges by Mona Delahooke, PhDON-DEMAND COURSE FOR COMBATTING TANTRUMS:
Learn exactly how to reduce the frequency, intensity and duration of your child's tantrums in my self-paced course, The Science of Tantrums.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Discover how you can use food to teach your children about acceptance, tolerance, and the beauty of cultural diversity!
Joining me is Priya Krishna. Priya is a food reporter and video host for the New York Times and the bestselling author of multiple cookbooks including her new kid's cookbook, Priya's Kitchen Adventures.
From redefining what constitutes a "kid recipe" to navigating picky eating habits, in this episode, Priya shares practical tips for making food playful, fun, and educational. Her mouthwatering recipes will offer you an easy entry point to teach your kids to embrace diversity and expand their palate, one delicious bite at a time.
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
3:10 - Resilience and distress tolerance is baked into being a younger sibling.
5:31 - When you have the bandwidth to slow down to allow your child to foster their independence, try to lean into those moments.
7:32 - We often expect our youngest to keep up with our oldest.
8:43 - Unpacking the guilt we often feel about parenting multiple children.
11:09 - How to be "transparent about the triaging" we're doing and why we're doing what.
15:20 - How to shift these strategies to apply to younger children and help toddlers adjust to having a new baby sibling, too.
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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This week my conversation about finding the beauty in life and learning to accept the inevitability of death with Rabbi Steve Leder continues.
Along with being the Rabbi at Wilshire Boulevard Temple in Los Angeles Rabbi Steve Leder is the author of five books, including The Beauty of What Remains and his newest book, For You When I Am Gone.
We're discussing how to answer your kid’s questions about the afterlife, the best and worst things to say to someone who is grieving, how to model for our kids the power of showing up in the face of loss, and how to accept and embrace the non-linear process of grieving.
This two-part episode will offer you tangible tools for infusing your daily life with even more meaning, purpose, and a profound sense of connection.
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
2:46 - Travel days can be free-for-alls when it comes to kids and screens - and that's okay.
7:10 - Incorporating a "brain break," a "snack break," and a "reading break" into your travel routine.
10:29 - Context switching can be difficult for children and is often something we need to help them build skills for, rather than expecting them to just be able to do it on their own.
12:08 - Dr. Rebecca shared some reflections of her own vulnerable parenting moments in real-time - sharing how even this conversation was kicking up feelings of shame and defensiveness, and how she worked through them.
16:14 - How to be kinder to ourselves and make mindset shifts when things don't go quite as planned.
20:58 - Modeling appropriate screen use can be one of the most effective forms of teaching (but we don't have to do it perfectly all the time to still have an impact!)
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Having to explain and help our kids process and grasp the concept of death, whether in a moment where it affects them personally, or simply as a concept as a whole, can be a particularly challenging conversation for parents to navigate.
Joining me is Rabbi Steve Leder. Along with being the Rabbi at Wilshire Boulevard Temple in Los Angeles, he is the author of five books, including The Beauty of What Remains and his newest book, For You When I Am Gone.
Whether you're seeking guidance on how to discuss life and death with your children or trying to come to terms with your own mortality, my hope is you walk away from this episode feeling a deeper understanding of how the very presence of death can make for more beauty in life.
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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
4:00 - Using screens when YOU need a break is absolutely okay and you shouldn't feel any shame or guilt around doing this!
5:05 - The difference between television and a tablet in regard to your child's development.
8:40 - How to separate your own anxiety and fear mongering around screen time so you can be educated and intentional about your child's use of technology.
9:30 - The cost/benefit of giving your child a tablet versus you keeping them off of a screen and then feeling so burnt out that you lose your cool and yell at your child.
13:03 - Ask yourself, "are screens decreasing your stress or adding more to it?"
16:38 - What the research reveals about how screens impact executive function development and the development of attention span.
18:55 - The difference between independent screen time versus interacting with screens together with your child.
Additional podcast episodes for how you can build your child's ability to engage in independent play:
Fostering independent play and a love of learning with Lizzie Assa
The Wonders of play with Jennie Monness
How play could be the key to mental health and well-being with Mike Rucker
✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨
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Delve into the transformative power of storytelling across the spectrum of parenthood, identity, and navigating life's challenges.
Joining me is award-winning journalist, speaker, and the author of Stop Waiting for Perfect: Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and Into Your Power, L'Oreal Thompson Payton.
L'Oreal sheds light on the often-overlooked struggles faced by black women navigating infertility, and the importance of representation in storytelling. From grappling with postpartum depression and anxiety to challenging societal norms surrounding motherhood, L'Oreal offers valuable insights into embracing imperfection and finding strength in authenticity.
INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT THE FIRST YEAR OF PARENTHOOD?
Click HERE to sign up for my FREE workshop, Confident Parenting from the Start, to get tools and strategies that you can put into practice right away to challenge self-doubt, put an end to your panic-Googling, and finally find the ease and enjoyment in early parenthood!
WANT TO TAKE YOUR LEARNING EVEN FURTHER?
Join me in The Authentic Parent, my comprehensive self-paced course that takes my workshop to the next level and teaches you everything you need to know (that no one tells you ahead of time) for how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood.
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