Episodes
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Maé is a French American print maker and ceramicist currently residing in Paris, France.
Her work touches on subjects such as sexuality and spirituality and uncomfortable things like shame and trauma.
She is finishing her masters this year and (hopefully) publishing her book soon on Japanese rope bondage as a radical act of relational humanityINSTA: maewithan.e
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In this episode, we welcome Rose back from maternity leave and focus on evolution and intimacy. There is laughter and tears (per usual) and talk of motherhood, creativity, putting in work, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Lisa Simpson. A great time is had by all; won't you join us?
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Tadeo Ilarde is a student getting his masters in Human Rights, specializing in Migration at one of Paris’ most esteemed universities.
We discuss the difference between sex work and sex trafficking and which populations tend to slip through the cracks even when governments are progressive in their legislation around sex.
Additionally, we learn about Tadeo’s incredible story and personal migration through different cultures, addictions and ultimately what his recovery looks like today. This is an informative, entertaining and tender episode with one of our new most favorite people.
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Heather Hayes is the founder and CEO of Heather R. Hayes & Associates, Inc. She is a Master’s level Licensed Counselor,
Board Registered Interventionist (CIP) and Certified ARISE Interventionist. Ms. Hayes earned her B.A. from Emory University
and her M.Ed. from Antioch University in Counseling Psychology. A veteran of the behavioral health field, Heather has over
35 years of experience treating clients with complex mental health issues and the full spectrum of addictive disorders. She
has also worked with clients of all ages and specializes in the treatment of adolescents/young adults, trauma, behavioral
issues and eating disorders.
Known as one of the country’s most prominent authorities on these topics, Ms. Hayes is a coveted speaker on the national
and international stage, is widely-recognized for her comprehensive and trauma-informed approach to intervention, and
has been published in numerous journals, books, and other industry publications. Ms. Hayes also serves as an on-air expert
and consultant for CNN and Dr. Oz and has been featured on A&E, ABC, CBS, BBC, FOX, MTV and NBC. In addition, Ms.
Hayes is a featured interventionist on the 2018 & 2019 seasons of A&E’s high-profile show Intervention.
Throughout her career, Ms. Hayes has been a lifeline for clients at their most profound points of suffering. She offers
clients and their families a safe haven as they navigate the recovery journey and works with the entire family system to
support long-term, sustainable healing.
As an independent interventionist and a staunch proponent of professional ethics, Ms. Hayes does not have financial
relationships with any treatment centers or clinicians. Over 95% of her interventions have successfully ended with the
subject agreeing to treatment.
Outside of work, Heather uses her expertise to give back to her community by volunteering as the psychological profiler with
the Forsyth County Sheriff’s Department Hostage Negotiation and SWAT Team.
We are so thrilled to welcome Heather to the show. This episode is emotional and honest and it was such a special opportunity to talk to her days before she celebrated her 40th year clean and sober, and to think about what's transpired in the 15 years since we've known Heather. In some ways, Sober Sex is a direct result of Heather Hayes' powerful work (a successful intervention). If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction of any kind and an intervention is necessary, don't hesitate to check out Heather's work at heatherhayes.com
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In this episode we review exciting highlights of the past year and discuss our aspirations moving forward with the podcast and in life, in addition to our fears, desires and silly dogs.
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Jessica Lahey is the author of the New York Times bestselling book, The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed and The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence. Over twenty years, Jess has taught every grade from sixth to twelfth in both public and private schools, and spent five years teaching in a drug and alcohol rehab for adolescents in Vermont, and serves as a prevention and recovery coach at Sana at Stowe, a medical detox and recovery center in Stowe, Vermont. She writes about education, parenting, and child welfare for The Washington Post, The Atlantic, is a book critic for Air Mail, and her biweekly column “The Parent Teacher Conference” ran for three years at the New York Times. She designed and wrote the educational curriculum for Amazon Kids’ award-winning animated series The Stinky and Dirty Show, and was a 2019 Pushcart Prize nominee for her Creative Nonfiction magazine essay, “I’ve Taught Monsters.” Jess holds the dubious honor of having written an article that was later adapted as a writing prompt for the 2018 SAT. She co-hosts the #AmWriting podcast with bestselling authors KJ Dell’Antonia and Sarina Bowen, and lives in Vermont with her husband, two sons, and a lot of dogs.
On this episode, we are truly thrilled to welcome multi-talented genius Jessica Lahey to chat with us about parenting, how drugs and alcohol affect brain development, what getting sober many years into a marriage looks like. On this episode it's Louisa flying solo as host as Lily and Rose had last minute emergencies but this is a great chat nonetheless!
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Emilyn Kowaleski is a sober queer feminist writer, director, and facilitator working towards collective healing, transformation, and liberation. They are on a mission to dismantle the oppressive forces that prevent us from being and being seen in the wholeness of our humanity. A theater-maker by training, Emilyn writes in a blend of disciplines including plays, performance pieces, and poetry, essays, and is currently working on a creative non-fiction book about the history of sex-segregated bathrooms in the United States. This conversation was vulnerable, enlightening and terrifically joyful and we hope that you love it as much as we do.
Check out Emilyn's work at:
https://www.emilynkowaleski.com/
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Francesca Ayala is a multi talented event producer, comedian, author and force of love and inclusivity in the world. In this episode, we discuss the therapeutic properties of comedy, cultural diversity in recovery and Fran's journey into sobriety during the pandemic. We are delighted to get to know her better on Sober Sex!
TW: Early Childhood Sexual Trauma (not explicit, but the existence of this is discussed).
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Brandon Rice is a person with an impressive and varied resume across numerous different fields. Louisa and Brandon met on a rave cruise where he was acting as tour manager around 2016 and since then he’s been A & R for a rad indie label, worked with the midnight mission in DTLA and is presently getting his masters degree in psychology. This episode is very 12-step oriented, but also contains a lot of wisdom and humor around issues spirituality, sexuality and mental health. We hope you check it out and enjoy it.
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On this week’s episode we talk with comedian and author Rebecca Rush. Enlightening, hilarious and a well of sex majik and deep wisdom, this conversation is a true delight. We discuss how escorting can be a healthy choice for self empowerment and financial security, laughing with others about the things we are ashamed with is the path to freedom, self-poly, Succession and so much more. Check it out!
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Alex2tone is a powerful truth angel, in addition to being the design director of LA-based street wear brand ‘Born x Raised’, graffiti artist, tattooer, film director and general creative force. He describes his evolving work to be characterized by ‘strange realness’ and a ‘trashy streak’. Whatever it is that ties the multi-hyphens of 2tone’s glorious aesthetic universe together, it’s working and we are delighted to talk to him today on Sober Sex.
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Amber (she/her) is a menstrual cycle coach and educator, equality warrior, as well an aspiring social scientist. Amber's main vision is decolonizing the menstrual cycle experience, helping menstruators to experience transformational menstrual embodiment through education and holistic healing, however that may look for feel for them. This conversation is revealing, empowering and enlightening, and we love Amber whole-heartedly! May you love this episode as much as we do.
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Acting as a rebellious force and the main antagonist of bass music, there’s no one like MUST DIE! We had the pleasure of talking to the delightful paradox that is Lee Austin Bates about his experiences within creativity, sobriety and sexuality, mental health and fatherhood.
Check him out at https://linktr.ee/mustdiemusic
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Loz McQ, otherwise known as ‘@brutalrecovery’, discusses making light from pain through laughter, pre-sobriety ‘disassociative sex mission’ and the indomitable spirit of recovery. We loved recording this funny, profound and enlightening episode, we hope you love listening to it. Check out Loz’s memes (and general incredible magic) at @brtualrecovery on instagram or patreon.com/brutalrecovery.
Reading List:
-The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron
-The War of Art by Stephen Pressfield
-I Love Pussy, A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer
-Animal by Lisa Taddeo
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Brooke Randolph is the founder of ’ Sober and Hungry’. She is a certified nutritionist and life coach who aims to help clients find holistic resilience and well-being, with a curriculum tailored to create lasting change. More specifically, she works with 12-step oriented healing around food and body issues. It is a delight to talk to her on this episode of Sober Sex.
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Max B aka fucking sober is one of the funniest people on the internet, especially when it comes to the hilariously painful joys and struggles of early recovery. While remaining largely anonymous, Max is kind enough to chat with us here on sober sex about sober sex, of course, but also, sober fatherhood, sober partnership, NOT being sober while in active alcoholism and what it’s like to be simultaneously internet famous and anonymous.
Warning: If you're sensitive to awkward pauses in conversation, something weird was going on with our internet so we either had giant lags or talked over each other for most of the show. We tried to fix this in editing but be warned! Otherwise this is a great conversation.
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Bae Leche aka Bree is a sex and relationship coach, fantasy facilitator and self proclaimed 'kinky mama' who specialized in non traditional, ferociously loving and creative ways of exploring the erotic. We discuss motherhood, poly and open relationships, the challenging journey to embracing all of one's sexuality and depth of desire. We are thrilled to have her on the show!
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Katie Rex is a dj, promoter, and producer. She has founded one of New York’s most awesome techno/fetish parties, has a powerful story around her own sexuality and journey within recovery. Kate is a wise, funny badass and our conversation covers everything from finding empowerment and healing in kink spaces, normalization and celebration of sex work and what being intentional with her energy looks like today. Find her on the web at @katierex.digital and bound at @bound_nyc or boundnyc.bandcamp.com. Thrillingly, this is also the first episode that Lily co-hosts while Rose is on maternity leave. Please ignore bizarre audio noise in the first 3 minutes (it passes!)
Find us at @fuckyeahsobersex on instagram and @sobersexpodcast on twitter. LINK RATE REVIEW SUBSCRIBE SHARE etc etc
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Lily Noelle Rogers is an adventurer. A dear friend and amazing human, Lily has worked in realms as diverse and exciting as live music event production, sober companion, photographer, food writer, world traveler, drone pilot, red cross worker and costumer. Thrillingly, she is going to be subbing in for Rose as co-host while Rose goes on maternity leave. This conversation is a deep and healing one about the possibility of recovery and healing from deep wounds into a space of liberated love, in addition to our own story of friendship and adventures in sobriety together.
TRIGGER WARNING: we discuss sexual abuse and rape, if these are sensitive issues for you, please skip this episode.
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Described by Klub Verboten founder Karl as ‘gatekeeper and mindful soul who always puts the world right and keeps us tied to our core values’, we are thrilled to welcome to the show Drew Beckett, an integral part of one of London’s most celebrated kink/fetish parties !
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