Listen later
-
Love yourself if you want to be a happy, fulfilled, confident, effective person, able to give and receive love, have self-esteem and a good sense of your self-worth.
But it’s one thing to understand this intellectually and quite another to really know and believe it. One of the best ways to accelerate a self-love habit is through using self-love rituals. Practicing self-love rituals is an easy enjoyable way to implant and build your self-love habit and behaviour until it becomes natural. Today we look at 11 self-love rituals to get you started, but first what’s so special about rituals?
What are rituals and why are they so powerful?A ritual involves a series of actions, sometimes in a prescribed order – which are a type of behaviour regularly and invariably followed by someone – in this case you!
Because that’s what we’re after isn’t it – a way of behaving you do regularly and invariably, habitually and consistently.
That’s why developing rituals is powerful, because rather than leaving it to randomness and chance or how we’re feeling on a particular day, by creating rituals we build them into our life and are more likely to do them. Once you’ve created the ritual you don’t have to think about it – it’s part of a system. It’s internalised.
Rituals will supercharge your habits and are better than habits in some ways. You can encompass more than one habit within a ritual and because rituals focus on specific ways of doing something, they are very focused.
Apart from building the habit, the other great thing about using rituals is that by following a set way of doing something you’re creating space and time in your life for it. Just doing these rituals will send your brain the message that this is important to you – you matter.
These rituals we’re talking about of themselves nothing out of the ordinary. You might think that’s not a ritual that’s just how I’m spending my evening. Great if that’s the case – but by virtue of thinking of it as a ritual and labelling it as a ritual – it makes it a thing. It raises it up out of the everyday and mundane and it becomes something more. It becomes that thing that you do, and what’s more you’re doing it with intention.
‘You’ timeMost of these self-love rituals fall into the category of how to spend ‘you’ time. This is time you put aside where you focus on yourself. Scheduling ‘you’ time is one of the key self-love habits. These rituals are a great way to help you do this. How you interpret them and make them your own will depend on your lifestyle, situation and preferences, but we’ve included a few suggestions to give you the idea.
11 Self-love ritualsRelaxing or pamper timeSpaProper moisturise and self massageBrush your skinTake a long bath or showerNurture / nourish timeSelf-developmentVisit a museumWatch a documentary,Joy timeThis will mean many different things to different people. It doesn’t really matter what it is – what matters is that you make a ritual and habit of scheduling time to do something that gives or brings you joy.
Something just on your own or with others.VolunteeringGet in the zone writing a novel or bookA hobby like painting, sketching, or a sportEven better if it’s something you’re good at so you’re building your self-esteem at the same time.Go for a walk in the country or around the cityGo to see a great film, show or playSchedule it to make it a ritual. It doesn’t have to be the same thing every day or for the same amount of time every day.
Make a ritual of asking yourself – what am I doing today that it going to bring me joy.
Laugh timeRead a funny book or cartoonWatch comedy TV program or filmGo to a comedy clubListen to a funny podcastThe power of laughter is immense.
You’re telling yourself you deserve to laugh – you deserve to be happy. Sometimes when we’re stressed or not feeling very loving towards ourselves we almost don’t feel right doing lots of laughing and having fun – especially if others are suffering – but we all deserve to be happy and making laughter a goal for your day or a ritual will help nudge it up the list and keep it on your radar.
Gratitude time – for yourselfOf course at BrilliantLivingHQ.com we’re big on gratitude and appreciation of what’s going on in our lives. It’s one of the most efficient and pleasing ways to ground us in our present, but more often than not it’s about other people and things around us. The difference with this self-love appreciation ritual is it’s about self-appreciation.
If you already practice appreciation each day e.g. you write a list every day keep going but ensure at least one item out of your three or however many you do is just about you.Or create a separate note of 1 to 5 things you appreciate about yourself today. It can be something you’ve done – maybe something you did well today, something nice someone said to you – a compliment or feedback – or something you appreciate about yourself.For example – your body might not look exactly the way you’d like it to look in every aspect, but it sure does an amazing job of keeping you alive. There are hundreds and thousands of things to appreciate about it – so you will never be stuck again for something to appreciate about yourself.It’s not always easy, we tend to feel a bit funny about writing down what we like about ourselves. It goes back to the old idea some of us were brought up with that there’s something unseemly about blowing your own trumpet or fishing for compliments. But this ritual will help you counteract those unhelpful beliefs.
And gratitude and appreciation stop you taking things for granted, like how amazing your body and you really are.
Coffee, tea or smoothie breakTake a break – on your own or with a friend, colleague, partner or familyMake the conscious decision to take ten (or longer) MeditationBeing mindful is one of the best ways of loving ourselves.Practice living in the here and now – not worrying about the future or ruminating on the past – but being present with your thoughts.Spend a few minutes in mindfulness meditation.Focus on your breathing and observe the thoughts as they come up and let them go.Don’t judge your thoughts but just be with them and let them go.AffirmationsAffirmations are one of our favourite rituals.
Affirmations are positive statements that affirm (or make firm) the behaviours and ways of thinking and being that help us be the person we want to be and achieve how we want to be.You can use affirmations for anything but they are by their very nature a great self-love ritual because they have all the essential elements of a great self-love ritual.They are repeatable – indeed their efficacy relies on repetition – it’s the constant repetition that helps to counteract previous thoughts and beliefs and starts to build and reinforce the positive affirming statements that you want to make into your new way of thinking.They are very personal – they relate to you and your thoughts.Some people might say that by using affirmations you’re reinforcing what you don’t like about yourself – but it’s the opposite. You’re accepting that this is how things are now and opening the door to creating new thought patterns and beliefs that will serve you well – this is a loving thing to do for yourself.This is putting yourself first so you can become more effective at something or happier or more fulfilled in some way – which will have a positive effect on others but it is primarily about you and how you feel.We start off our Brilliant Living™ affirmations and suggest you do it too with with the words ‘I fully love and accept myself’. This is an immensely powerful statement of self-love.If you want to be more loving towards yourself, start with our Brilliant Living™ affirmations for love. Treat yourself (they’re very reasonable) to bring more love into your life, including love for yourself.
Food self-love ritualsBe intentional with a meal and make it into a ritual – so you’re intentionally feeding yourself health-giving foodInstead of rushing to get something on table, take your time to do something special or different (maybe bake a cake). Put some nice music on and accept it’s going to take you an hour and that you’re going to enjoy the experience.Pet timeWalk, cuddle, play with or groom your dog or cat or talk to your budgerigarYou might not get this if you don’t have a pet – but if you do have one you’ll know what we mean!
Say ‘I love you’Tell yourself ‘I love you’ everydayLook in the mirror and say it out loudIt’s like an affirmation but is worth stating separately.Say it first thing in the morning or last thing at night or both.That’s enough to be going on with for now. We would love to hear your suggestions which you can leave in our Facebook group or on our Facebook page.
We’re not suggesting you do them all every day (but how great would that make your day!) But make some ‘you’ time that is non-negotiable. Decide what’s going to be in that ‘you’ time, and it might include 1, 2, or 3 of these self-love rituals.
Have a lovely time this week being purposeful about it. That’s the secret to all of this - remembering to do it and bringing it to your awareness on a daily basis so it becomes a ritual and then a habit.
Episode 83 of the Changeability PodcastListen to episode 83 of the Changeability Podcast to hear us talk about all of this and more.
Links mentioned in the show:Episode 82 -10 ways to build the self-love habitSix reasons to love yourselfEpisode 81 - Self-loveJoin our free Changeability Facebook GroupLike our Brilliant Living Facebook PageBrilliantLivingHQ.com/affirmations-products to find our affirmations including your love affirmations -
Self-care podcast talking about Self-Care Versus Self-Hate, Differences Between Self-Love & Self-Hate and Shifting from Self-Hate to Self-Love.
TOPICS::
** Announcements (01:29).
** Self-Love VERSUS Self-Hate (08:10). ** Differences Between Self-Love & Self-Hate (20:23). ** Shifting From Self-Hate to Self-Love (31:45).NOTES::
Show notes: amberapproved.ca/podcast/61
Leave me a review and 5 stars at amberapproved.ca/review
Email me at [email protected]
SHOW LINKS::
E-mail me at [email protected] for more info on my Group Program starting in Mid-January. Check out the rest of the info here about the program http://bit.ly/2gi21qD
Get the winter edition of Amber Approved Magazine http://bit.ly/1IvuSM9.
Join The No Sugarcoating Private Faccebook Group: http://bit.ly/2d1r1Qa
Consequences of No Self-care workshop details: http://bit.ly/2h7dKc7
Check out my Youtube Channel Here for more transformational videos: http://bit.ly/2i6UmxJ -
Love is one of the most powerful forces in the universe. Not just in a metaphysical way, but in a very tangible, practical way that guides our choices everyday.
Love compels us to care for and support others. Love compels us to create and bring our thoughts into physical form. Love compels us to put ourselves in harm’s way so that others can live. Love compels us to work hard, to practice, and to respect the process. Love compels us to get back up when we fall, and rise to the challenge in the face of adversity. Love heals.
Love is also not discriminatory. Although, that’s the way our society has allowed it to be framed. In our world today, it’s ok to love someone or something else. But, loving yourself… nah. That would be self-centered.
What if I told you that loving yourself was the greatest love of all? Hold up, have you actually listened to Whitney Houston’s song “Greatest Love Of All”? Well, let me give you a little refresher:
I believe that children are our future.
Teach them well and let them lead the way.
Show them all the beauty they possess inside.
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier.
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be.
Now, let’s break this down line-by-line.
I believe that children are our future: This is a statement emphasizing how important our children are. That they carry the torch. They are, in fact, the future of everything. We all start here. And we all deserve a chance.
Teach them well and let them lead the way: This encompasses how we are all programmed at an early age… and need to be taught “well”. With that, we are capable of leading us into a brighter future.
Show them all the beauty they possess inside: Establishing self-love is often directed by those entrusted to care for us. This line highlights that. It’s one of the greatest gifts to know that you have immense beauty inside of you. (And no one can take that from you… as highlighted in another line from the song, “No matter what they take from me, they can’t take away my dignity.”) If we can be shown the beauty we possess inside, we will find strength, happiness, and real love.
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier: This line makes clear that we need our sense of self-love and self-worth to be reaffirmed. Obstacles will be presented along the way that will challenge your sense of self-worth. If we are instilled with pride and a sense that it’s “ok” to love yourself, it will make life easier (and we can eliminate unnecessary suffering).
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be: Kids possess an innate quality of self-love that adults tend to forgo as they get older. That quality is being honest about what they want, and a desire to be happy. Kids are all about experiencing joy. That’s what this line of the song spotlights. If we can pay attention, and tune into that joy, we can be reminded of the beauty inside of us.
The interesting thing is that I didn’t listen to this song until the recording of this episode was complete. Each and every one of these points were covered in this episode in some form or fashion, and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. The greatest love of all was outlined in this song many decades ago. Yet, we seem to have overlooked what the song actually means.
We’re at an epidemic place in our society’s collective lack of self-love. And its results are pouring into every area of our lives. I decided to do something about it. I decided to share the uncomfortable, seemingly unbeautiful stuff within me... in hopes that it can help someone else to see just how much they matter, and just how much they deserve to be loved. And especially deserving of “The Greatest Love Of All”. Click play, listen deeply, and enjoy.
In this episode you'll discover: Why chocolate is commonly associated with love. Why there’s a recent shift to positive psychology. What self-love actually is. How self-love can influence eating habits. The negative feelings that often come with food choices. How different things in your life are dramatically affected by your level of self-Love. The 5 major places that our neglect of self-love comes from. What kids know about self-love that adults tend to forget. Why unhealthy comparison has become an epidemic. How we are culturally programmed to NOT love ourselves. How knowing ourselves can unconsciously diminish our self-love. Why we all need to feel like we matter. The difference between your innate value and explicit value. Why deciding what you really want is part of self-love. How lying about not knowing something can sabotage our success. How we can start to allow ourselves to want what we really want. The 5 steps to develop more self-love and self-value. Items mentioned in this episode include: Foursigmatic.com/model ⇐ Get 15% off your daily health elixirs and coffee! Ettitude ⇐ Get yours right here for 10% off! How Chocolate Can Save The World - TEDx 4 Steps To Fast Track Your Results - Episode 100 How To Go From Average To Phenomenal - With Eric Thomas - Episode 263 13 Rules Of Health That I Live By - Episode 158 Living Forward by Michael Hyatt Model Mondays ⇐ Get access here!* Download The Transcript
Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Model Health Show. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute and leave a quick rating and review of the show on Apple Podcasts by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!
Click Here to Subscribe via Apple Podcasts
Click Here to Subscribe via Stitcher
Click here to Subscribe via Spotify
Click here to Subscribe via Soundcloud
-
Tonight we have with us Prof. Giana Cicchelli discussing the study of Sociology of religion and how it differentiates magick and witchcraft from religion, and only mentions it when look at the growth of Wicca, and the Goddess Movement. This differentiation seems to be based on an assumption by most sociologists that magick and witchcraft are different from religion, and concerned with different outlooks and outcomes. Prof. Cicchelli will cover the basic premise of sociology of religion, and the position of witchcraft within that, drawing from her own observations and research. The talk will define magick and witchcraft and examine the difference between prayer and spellwork. Other religions beyond witchcraft are compared and explored as well.
-
Hello and thank you once again for joining us down at the crossroads for some music, magick, and Paganism. Where witches gather for the sabbath, offerings are made, pacts are signed for musical fame and we cross paths with today’s most influential Pagans, occultists, and deep thinkers. I am your bewitching, bald headed, host Chris Orapello and tonight Tara and I meet with author and Wiccan priestess Courtney Weber to discuss her new book Tarot for One as well as our time together at FaerieCon, the tarot deck she created Tarot of the Boroughs, along with some of the tips and tricks she’s learned over the years to running a coven. Courtney offers her insight into being a Priestess, her love of certain eighties movies, and further evidence that she’s not afraid to have a good time. This was a great discussion with Courtney as it was nice to speak with her for the first time since meeting at FaerieCon.
Courtney Weber is a Priestess, author, and activist. She is the author of "Brigid: History, Mystery, and Magick of the Celtic Goddess" and "Tarot for One: The Art of Reading for Yourself (both through Weiser Books)." She is the producer and designer of "Tarot of the Boroughs": A contemporary Tarot deck set in NYC, composed of original photography. Courtney is on the board of Solar Cross Temple. She lives in Manhattan with her husband and cats. www.thecocowitch.comFeatured Songs:
“Down to Sea” by Elephant Revival "Wolf an Dro” by Omnia “Maker of my Sorrow” by Eliza Rickman “Rootless” by S.J. Tucker “Sea Song” by The Owl Service “Bridge of Birds” by The Familiars “Movements in the Sky” by Church of the Cosmic Skull “Condemned to Fire” by G00dewyfeStores Mentioned:
Soul Journey The Mystic Dream Catland Books The Sacred Well Phoenix and Dragon MindBodySoul Yoga StudioOther Links Mentioned:
The Cocowitch.com FaerieCon The Slipper Room -
If you’ve ever struggled with anxiety, illness, or dis-ease, then do we have the Clarity Cleanse Show for you.
Today I’ll be talking with Dr. Habib Sadeghi, Co-founder of the Be Hive of Healing Integrative Medical Center in LA, the author of Within: A Spiritual Awakening to Love and Weight Loss, the publisher of MegaZEN, and the author of a brilliant new book on healing, with a foreword by Gwyneth Paltrow, The Clarity Cleanse.
And that’s just what I want to talk with him about today, about 12 steps to finding renewed energy, spiritual fulfillment, AND emotional healing.
The Clarity Cleanse Self-Improvement & Self-Help Topics Include:
What was Dr. Sadeghi’s wake-up call in his second year of med school? What did the doctors recommend? Who was Gary the Angel and how did he change his outlook on life? What does love have to do with healing? What is a journey into love? How can cancer be a signpost for something deeper on the inside? What are the messages we’re getting from our bodies? What does living in clarity mean? How is illness an expression of a deeper wound? What’s the importance of a container? What’s good psycho-spiritual hygiene? What’s a clarity mindset? What’s the process of creating clarity? What’s the importance of acceptance? What is Purge Emotional Writing? What’s the importance of asking questions? What’s the importance of embracing suffering (and reframing it)? What is compassionate self-forgiveness? What does feeling better to get better mean? What does a South African Krugerrand and a tarnished Mexican Peso have to do with anything? For More Info Visit: BeingClarity.comDr. Habib Sadeghi on How to Find Renewed Energy, Spiritual Fulfillment & Emotional (and Physical) Healing!!! Inspirational | Motivational | Spiritual | Spirituality | Mindfulness | Meditation | Diet | Nutrition | Self-Improvement | Self-Help | Inspire
For More Info Visit: www.InspireNationShow.com
-
If you’ve ever wanted to find more love, happiness, or success in your life, then do we have the POWER OF YOUR DECISIONS show for you.
Today we’ll talk about How to Step Into Your Power and into your future, through the decisions you consciously CHOOSE to make.
Step Into Your Power Self-Improvement & Self-Help Topics Include:
What does Nashville have to do with the power of a decision? What decisions have we made for Inspire Nation? What does intuition have to do with important decisions? What Michael and Jessica learned from an astro-cartographer? What it means to ask for assistance from the universe in making your decisions? What we can learn from Thomas Edison about decisions? What do you do when you meet resistance? Why stoicism may not help when it comes to decisions? What’s the importance of having a fire under your butt? What’s the real truth of fear and anxiety when it comes to your decisions? What is creative angst and how do we move past it? Why you don’t want to work on your dreams in the evening? How to reach your lifetime dreams. How do you get back to who you are – your authentic true self? How do you choose your life and step forward into your power? How your breath can change your energy, your decisions and everything. For more info visit: FireItUpWithCJ.comCJ Liu & Michael Sandler on The Life-Changing Power of the Decisions & How to Make Them!!! Health | Inspiration | Motivation | Spiritual | Spirituality | Inspirational | Motivational | Mindfulness | Meditation | Self-Improvement | Self-Help | Inspire
For More Info Visit: www.InspireNationShow.com
-
If you’ve ever wanted true transformation your life, then do we have the Sacred Powers show for you.
Today I’ll be talking with best-selling author Davidji, stress management expert, meditation teacher, and the author of a brilliant new book on awakened transformation, Sacred Powers.
And that’s just what I want to talk with him about today, about discovering your sacred power & dive deep for awakened transformation, opening your heart, and connecting with the divine.
Discover Your Sacred Powers Self-Improvement & Self-Help Topics Include:
How did Davidji blow up his life? What is a butterfly moment? How did he end up in India? What is a Nadi and how did he find one? How did his life change from then on? What are a few of the Five Divine Principles? What does it mean the universe is within us? What does it mean that alignment is everything? What does it mean to understand our oneness? What does it mean to accept ourselves in every moment? What is the sacred affirmation Aham Brahmasmi – I am the Universe? What is the divine principle of one? What is the sacred power of presence? What is the sacred power of your ripple? What is the sacred power of spirit? What is the divine principle of rebirth? And the divine principle of infinite flow? How do we expand our hearts more? To Find Out More visit Davidji.comDavidji on How to Discover Your Sacred Powers & Open Your Heart for a Phenomenal Awakened Transformation!!! Health | Motivation | Spiritual | Spirituality | Inspirational | Motivational | Mindfulness | Self-Improvement | Self-Help | Inspire
For More Info Visit: www.InspireNationShow.com
-
If you’ve ever struggled with family, emotions, time or being on top of your game, how to be okay with not being okay show for you.
Today we’ll talk about being extra-kind and gentle to yourself, even when you’re struggling, far from your best, or melting down with the super-moon.
How to Be Okay Self-Improvement and Self-Help Topics Include:
What has happened to people from the Super Moon and after the Super Moon. What happens when negative emotions come up? What do we do when we internally berate ourselves? What do we do with negative self-talk? What does it look like to give yourself unconditional love? How can unconditional self-love help ourselves? What it means to focus on the connection of Heaven and Earth? How do we go looking for any internal work we have to do? What’s the importance of not judging yourself for the moment (even if you’ve melted down) What does it mean to be kinder and more loving to oneself? What is the stillpoint – and why does CJ want to learn more about it? What can we learn about heart openings – and dropping your shields. What happened with Michael and Jessica’s patreon backstage pass? Patreon.com/inspirenation For more info visit: FireItUpWithCJ.com How can you be okay with not being perfect – and move past perfectionism? How are you rewarded yourself for stepping out there?CJ Liu on What to Do When You're Struggling & How to Be Extra Kind, Loving and Gentle to Yourself! Health | Inspiration | Motivation | Spiritual | Spirituality | Meditation | Inspirational | Motivational | Self-Improvement | Self-Help | Inspire
For More Info Visit: www.InspireNationShow.com
-
If you’ve ever wanted more genuine, fulfilling life, then do we have the show for you!
Today I’ll be talking with Sandra Joseph, The Record-Holding, Phantom of the Opera’s longest leading lady and the author of a phenomenal new book on living your life, Unmasking What Matters.
And that’s just what I want to talk with her about 10 key life lessons, from 10 years on Broadway to unmask what matters most, and step into your field of power.
Unmasking What Matters Self-Improvement & Self-Help Topics Include:
How did she become the longest running lead actress on Broadway? How did she get into acting? How did she overcome the fear of public speaking? What's the importance of facing fears to prevent regrets? What happened in her 5th grade performance that changed her life? What was her vow and what can we learn from it? What was her commitment she made after college and what does that mean for us? How do we move past the internal wiring that's holding us back? How did she move past her fears to get the lead role in the Phantom of the Opera? How do we move past Imposter Syndrome? How do we move past our wounds from the past? What's it mean to see behind the mask? What's the importance of starting a discussion with worthiness? What does it mean that we're truly enough? How do we turn toward ourselves? How do we counteract our tendency to beat up on ourselves when things haven't gone well. What's the importance of presence? How do we take a vow of ultimate kindness toward ourselves? What's it mean to let yourself be seen? What's the importance of choosing love over fear??? How do we move past self-criticism? What's the importance of self-compassion? What's it mean to stand in your field of power? What's it mean to value your role??? What's the importance of unconditional love? Who is the Phantom of the Opera who didn't get away? For more info visit: www.SandraJoseph.comPhantom of the Opera's Longest Leading Lady Sandra Joseph On How to Move Past the Wiring That Holds Us Back!!! Health | Inspiration | Motivation | Spiritual | Spirituality | Inspirational | Motivational | Self-Improvement | Self-Help | Inspire
For More Info Visit: www.InspireNationShow.com
-
Deity and Reality(1152.1) 105:0.1 TO EVEN high orders of universe intelligences infinity is only partially comprehensible, and the finality of reality is only relatively understandable. The human mind, as it seeks to penetrate the eternity-mystery of the origin and destiny of all that is called real, may helpfully approach the problem by conceiving eternity-infinity as an almost limitless ellipse which is produced by one absolute cause, and which functions throughout this universal circle of endless diversification, ever seeking some absolute and infinite potential of destiny.(1152.2) 105:0.2 When the mortal intellect attempts to grasp the concept of reality totality, such a finite mind is face to face with infinity-reality; reality totality is infinity and therefore can never be fully comprehended by any mind that is subinfinite in concept capacity.(1152.3) 105:0.3 The human mind can hardly form an adequate concept of eternity existences, and without such comprehension it is impossible to portray even our concepts of reality totality. Nevertheless, we may attempt such a presentation, although we are fully aware that our concepts must be subjected to profound distortion in the process of translation-modification to the comprehension level of mortal mind.1. The Philosophic Concept of the I AM(1152.4) 105:1.1 Absolute primal causation in infinity the philosophers of the universes attribute to the Universal Father functioning as the infinite, the eternal, and the absolute I AM.(1152.5) 105:1.2 There are many elements of danger attendant upon the presentation to the mortal intellect of this idea of an infinite I AM since this concept is so remote from human experiential understanding as to involve serious distortion of meanings and misconception of values. Nevertheless, the philosophic concept of the I AM does afford finite beings some basis for an attempted approach to the partial comprehension of absolute origins and infinite destinies. But in all our attempts to elucidate the genesis and fruition of reality, let it be made clear that this concept of the I AM is, in all personality meanings and values, synonymous with the First Person of Deity, the Universal Father of all personalities. But this postulate of the I AM is not so clearly identifiable in undeified realms of universal reality.(1152.6) 105:1.3 The I AM is the Infinite; the I AM is also infinity. From the sequential, time viewpoint, all reality has its origin in the infinite I AM, whose solitary existence in past infinite eternity must be a finite creature’s premier philosophic postulate. The concept of the I AM connotes unqualified infinity, the undifferentiated reality of all that could ever be in all of an infinite eternity.(1153.1) 105:1.4 As an existential concept the I AM is neither deified nor undeified, neither actual nor potential, neither personal nor impersonal, neither static nor dynamic. No qualification can be applied to the Infinite except to state that the I AM is. The philosophic postulate of the I AM is one universe concept which is somewhat more difficult of comprehension than that of the Unqualified Absolute.(1153.2) 105:1.5 To the finite mind there simply must be a beginning, and though there never was a real beginning to reality, still there are certain source relationships which reality manifests to infinity. The prereality, primordial, eternity situation may be thought of something like this: At some infinitely distant, hypothetical, past-eternity moment, the I AM may be conceived as both thing and no thing, as both cause and effect, as both volition and response. At this hypothetical eternity moment there is no differentiation throughout all infinity. Infinity is filled by the Infinite; the Infinite encompasses infinity. This is the hypothetical static moment of eternity; actuals are still contained within their potentials, and potentials have not yet appeared within the infinity of the I AM. But even in this conjectured situation we must assume the existence of the possibility of self-will.(1153.3) 105:1.6 Ever remember that man’s comprehension of the Universal Father is a personal experience. God, as your spiritual Father, is comprehensible to you and to all other mortals; but your experiential worshipful concept of the Universal Father must always be less than your philosophic postulate of the infinity of the First Source and Center, the I AM. When we speak of the Father, we mean God as he is understandable by his creatures both high and low, but there is much more of Deity which is not comprehensible to universe creatures. God, your Father and my Father, is that phase of the Infinite which we perceive in our personalities as an actual experiential reality, but the I AM ever remains as our hypothesis of all that we feel is unknowable of the First Source and Center. And even that hypothesis probably falls far short of the unfathomed infinity of original reality.(1153.4) 105:1.7 The universe of universes, with its innumerable host of inhabiting personalities, is a vast and complex organism, but the First Source and Center is infinitely more complex than the universes and personalities which have become real in response to his willful mandates. When you stand in awe of the magnitude of the master universe, pause to consider that even this inconceivable creation can be no more than a partial revelation of the Infinite.(1153.5) 105:1.8 Infinity is indeed remote from the experience level of mortal comprehension, but even in this age on Urantia your concepts of infinity are growing, and they will continue to grow throughout your endless careers stretching onward into future eternity. Unqualified infinity is meaningless to the finite creature, but infinity is capable of self-limitation and is susceptible of reality expression to all levels of universe existences. And the face which the Infinite turns toward all universe personalities is the face of a Father, the Universal Father of love.2. The I AM as Triune and as Sevenfold(1153.6) 105:2.1 In considering the genesis of reality, ever bear in mind that all absolute reality is from eternity and is without beginning of existence. By absolute reality we refer to the three existential persons of Deity, the Isle of Paradise, and the three Absolutes. These seven realities are co-ordinately eternal, notwithstanding that we resort to time-space language in presenting their sequential origins to human beings.(1154.1) 105:2.2 In following the chronological portrayal of the origins of reality, there must be a postulated theoretical moment of “first” volitional expression and “first” repercussional reaction within the I AM. In our attempts to portray the genesis and generation of reality, this stage may be conceived as the self-differentiation of The Infinite One from The Infinitude, but the postulation of this dual relationship must always be expanded to a triune conception by the recognition of the eternal continuum of The Infinity, the I AM.(1154.2) 105:2.3 This self-metamorphosis of the I AM culminates in the multiple differentiation of deified reality and of undeified reality, of potential and actual reality, and of certain other realities that can hardly be so classified. These differentiations of the theoretical monistic I AM are eternally integrated by simultaneous relationships arising within the same I AM — the prepotential, preactual, prepersonal, monothetic prereality which, though infinite, is revealed as absolute in the presence of the First Source and Center and as personality in the limitless love of the Universal Father.(1154.3) 105:2.4 By these internal metamorphoses the I AM is establishing the basis for a sevenfold self-relationship. The philosophic (time) concept of the solitary I AM and the transitional (time) concept of the I AM as triune can now be enlarged to encompass the I AM as sevenfold. This sevenfold — or seven phase — nature may be best suggested in relation to the Seven Absolutes of Infinity:(1154.4) 105:2.5 1. The Universal Father. I AM father of the Eternal Son. This is the primal personality relationship of actualities. The absolute personality of the Son makes absolute the fact of God’s fatherhood and establishes the potential sonship of all personalities. This relationship establishes the personality of the Infinite and consummates its spiritual revelation in the personality of the Original Son. This phase of the I AM is partially experiencible on spiritual levels even by mortals who, while yet in the flesh, may worship our Father.(1154.5) 105:2.6 2. The Universal Controller. I AM cause of eternal Paradise. This is the primal impersonal relationship of actualities, the original nonspiritual association. The Universal Father is God-as-love; the Universal Controller is God-as-pattern. This relationship establishes the potential of form — configuration — and determines the master pattern of impersonal and nonspiritual relationship — the master pattern from which all copies are made.(1154.6) 105:2.7 3. The Universal Creator. I AM one with the Eternal Son. This union of the Father and the Son (in the presence of Paradise) initiates the creative cycle, which is consummated in the appearance of conjoint personality and the eternal universe. From the finite mortal’s viewpoint, reality has its true beginnings with the eternity appearance of the Havona creation. This creative act of Deity is by and through the God of Action, who is in essence the unity of the Father-Son manifested on and to all levels of the actual. Therefore is divine creativity unfailingly characterized by unity, and this unity is the outward reflection of the absolute oneness of the duality of the Father-Son and of the Trinity of the Father-Son-Spirit.(1155.1) 105:2.8 4. The Infinite Upholder. I AM self-associative. This is the primordial association of the statics and potentials of reality. In this relationship, all qualifieds and unqualifieds are compensated. This phase of the I AM is best understood as the Universal Absolute — the unifier of the Deity and the Unqualified Absolutes.(1155.2) 105:2.9 5. The Infinite Potential. I AM self-qualified. This is the infinity bench mark bearing eternal witness to the volitional self-limitation of the I AM by virtue of which there was achieved threefold self-expression and self-revelation. This phase of the I AM is usually understood as the Deity Absolute.(1155.3) 105:2.10 6. The Infinite Capacity. I AM static-reactive. This is the endless matrix, the possibility for all future cosmic expansion. This phase of the I AM is perhaps best conceived as the supergravity presence of the Unqualified Absolute.(1155.4) 105:2.11 7. The Universal One of Infinity. I AM as I AM. This is the stasis or self-relationship of Infinity, the eternal fact of infinity-reality and the universal truth of reality-infinity. In so far as this relationship is discernible as personality, it is revealed to the universes in the divine Father of all personality — even of absolute personality. In so far as this relationship is impersonally expressible, it is contacted by the universe as the absolute coherence of pure energy and of pure spirit in the presence of the Universal Father. In so far as this relationship is conceivable as an absolute, it is revealed in the primacy of the First Source and Center; in him we all live and move and have our being, from the creatures of space to the citizens of Paradise; and this is just as true of the master universe as of the infinitesimal ultimaton, just as true of what is to be as of that which is and of what has been.3. The Seven Absolutes of Infinity(1155.5) 105:3.1 The seven prime relationships within the I AM eternalize as the Seven Absolutes of Infinity. But though we may portray reality origins and infinity differentiation by a sequential narrative, in fact all seven Absolutes are unqualifiedly and co-ordinately eternal. It may be necessary for mortal minds to conceive of their beginnings, but always should this conception be overshadowed by the realization that the seven Absolutes had no beginning; they are eternal and as such have always been. The seven Absolutes are the premise of reality. They have been described in these papers as follows:(1155.6) 105:3.2 1. The First Source and Center. First Person of Deity and primal nondeity pattern, God, the Universal Father, creator, controller, and upholder; universal love, eternal spirit, and infinite energy; potential of all potentials and source of all actuals; stability of all statics and dynamism of all change; source of pattern and Father of persons. Collectively, all seven Absolutes equivalate to infinity, but the Universal Father himself actually is infinite.(1155.7) 105:3.3 2. The Second Source and Center. Second Person of Deity, the Eternal and Original Son; the absolute personality realities of the I AM and the basis for the realization-revelation of “I AM personality.” No personality can hope to attain the Universal Father except through his Eternal Son; neither can personality attain to spirit levels of existence apart from the action and aid of this absolute pattern for all personalities. In the Second Source and Center spirit is unqualified while personality is absolute.(1156.1) 105:3.4 3. The Paradise Source and Center. Second nondeity pattern, the eternal Isle of Paradise; the basis for the realization-revelation of “I AM force” and the foundation for the establishment of gravity control throughout the universes. Regarding all actualized, nonspiritual, impersonal, and nonvolitional reality, Paradise is the absolute of patterns. Just as spirit energy is related to the Universal Father through the absolute personality of the Mother-Son, so is all cosmic energy grasped in the gravity control of the First Source and Center through the absolute pattern of the Paradise Isle. Paradise is not in space; space exists relative to Paradise, and the chronicity of motion is determined through Paradise relationship. The eternal Isle is absolutely at rest; all other organized and organizing energy is in eternal motion; in all space, only the presence of the Unqualified Absolute is quiescent, and the Unqualified is co-ordinate with Paradise. Paradise exists at the focus of space, the Unqualified pervades it, and all relative existence has its being within this domain.(1156.2) 105:3.5 4. The Third Source and Center. Third Person of Deity, the Conjoint Actor; infinite integrator of Paradise cosmic energies with the spirit energies of the Eternal Son; perfect co-ordinator of the motives of will and the mechanics of force; unifier of all actual and actualizing reality. Through the ministrations of his manifold children the Infinite Spirit reveals the mercy of the Eternal Son while at the same time functioning as the infinite manipulator, forever weaving the pattern of Paradise into the energies of space. This selfsame Conjoint Actor, this God of Action, is the perfect expression of the limitless plans and purposes of the Father-Son while functioning himself as the source of mind and the bestower of intellect upon the creatures of a far-flung cosmos.(1156.3) 105:3.6 5. The Deity Absolute. The causational, potentially personal possibilities of universal reality, the totality of all Deity potential. The Deity Absolute is the purposive qualifier of the unqualified, absolute, and nondeity realities. The Deity Absolute is the qualifier of the absolute and the absolutizer of the qualified — the destiny inceptor.(1156.4) 105:3.7 6. The Unqualified Absolute. Static, reactive, and abeyant; the unrevealed cosmic infinity of the I AM; totality of nondeified reality and finality of all nonpersonal potential. Space limits the function of the Unqualified, but the presence of the Unqualified is without limit, infinite. There is a concept periphery to the master universe, but the presence of the Unqualified is limitless; even eternity cannot exhaust the boundless quiescence of this nondeity Absolute.(1156.5) 105:3.8 7. The Universal Absolute. Unifier of the deified and the undeified; correlator of the absolute and the relative. The Universal Absolute (being static, potential, and associative) compensates the tension between the ever-existent and the uncompleted.*(1156.6) 105:3.9 The Seven Absolutes of Infinity constitute the beginnings of reality. As mortal minds would regard it, the First Source and Center would appear to be antecedent to all absolutes. But such a postulate, however helpful, is invalidated by the eternity coexistence of the Son, the Spirit, the three Absolutes, and the Paradise Isle.*(1157.1) 105:3.10 It is a truth that the Absolutes are manifestations of the I AM-First Source and Center; it is a fact that these Absolutes never had a beginning but are co-ordinate eternals with the First Source and Center. The relationships of absolutes in eternity cannot always be presented without involving paradoxes in the language of time and in the concept patterns of space. But regardless of any confusion concerning the origin of the Seven Absolutes of Infinity, it is both fact and truth that all reality is predicated upon their eternity existence and infinity relationships.4. Unity, Duality, and Triunity(1157.2) 105:4.1 The universe philosophers postulate the eternity existence of the I AM as the primal source of all reality. And concomitant therewith they postulate the self-segmentation of the I AM into the primary self-relationships — the seven phases of infinity. And simultaneous with this assumption is the third postulate — the eternity appearance of the Seven Absolutes of Infinity and the eternalization of the duality association of the seven phases of the I AM and these seven Absolutes.(1157.3) 105:4.2 The self-revelation of the I AM thus proceeds from static self through self-segmentation and self-relationship to absolute relationships, relationships with self-derived Absolutes. Duality becomes thus existent in the eternal association of the Seven Absolutes of Infinity with the sevenfold infinity of the self-segmented phases of the self-revealing I AM. These dual relationships, eternalizing to the universes as the seven Absolutes, eternalize the basic foundations for all universe reality.(1157.4) 105:4.3 It has been sometime stated that unity begets duality, that duality begets triunity, and that triunity is the eternal ancestor of all things. There are, indeed, three great classes of primordial relationships, and they are:(1157.5) 105:4.4 1. Unity relationships. Relations existent within the I AM as the unity thereof is conceived as a threefold and then as a sevenfold self-differentiation.(1157.6) 105:4.5 2. Duality relationships. Relations existent between the I AM as sevenfold and the Seven Absolutes of Infinity.(1157.7) 105:4.6 3. Triunity relationships. These are the functional associations of the Seven Absolutes of Infinity.(1157.8) 105:4.7 Triunity relationships arise upon duality foundations because of the inevitability of Absolute interassociation. Such triunity associations eternalize the potential of all reality; they encompass both deified and undeified reality.(1157.9) 105:4.8 The I AM is unqualified infinity as unity. The dualities eternalize reality foundations. The triunities eventuate the realization of infinity as universal function.(1157.10) 105:4.9 Pre-existentials become existential in the seven Absolutes, and existentials become functional in the triunities, the basic association of Absolutes. And concomitant with the eternalization of the triunities the universe stage is set — the potentials are existent and the actuals are present — and the fullness of eternity witnesses the diversification of cosmic energy, the outspreading of Paradise spirit, and the endowment of mind together with the bestowal of personality, by virtue of which all of these Deity and Paradise derivatives are unified in experience on the creature level and by other techniques on the supercreature level.5. Promulgation of Finite Reality(1158.1) 105:5.1 Just as the original diversification of the I AM must be attributed to inherent and self-contained volition, so must the promulgation of finite reality be ascribed to the volitional acts of Paradise Deity and to the repercussional adjustments of the functional triunities.(1158.2) 105:5.2 Prior to the deitization of the finite, it would appear that all reality diversification took place on absolute levels; but the volitional act promulgating finite reality connotes a qualification of absoluteness and implies the appearance of relativities.(1158.3) 105:5.3 While we present this narrative as a sequence and portray the historic appearance of the finite as a direct derivative of the absolute, it should be borne in mind that transcendentals both preceded and succeeded all that is finite. Transcendental ultimates are, in relation to the finite, both causal and consummational.(1158.4) 105:5.4 Finite possibility is inherent in the Infinite, but the transmutation of possibility to probability and inevitability must be attributed to the self-existent free will of the First Source and Center, activating all triunity associations. Only the infinity of the Father’s will could ever have so qualified the absolute level of existence as to eventuate an ultimate or to create a finite.(1158.5) 105:5.5 With the appearance of relative and qualified reality there comes into being a new cycle of reality — the growth cycle — a majestic downsweep from the heights of infinity to the domain of the finite, forever swinging inward to Paradise and Deity, always seeking those high destinies commensurate with an infinity source.(1158.6) 105:5.6 These inconceivable transactions mark the beginning of universe history, mark the coming into existence of time itself. To a creature, the beginning of the finite is the genesis of reality; as viewed by creature mind, there is no actuality conceivable prior to the finite. This newly appearing finite reality exists in two original phases:(1158.7) 105:5.7 1. Primary maximums, the supremely perfect reality, the Havona type of universe and creature.(1158.8) 105:5.8 2. Secondary maximums, the supremely perfected reality, the superuniverse type of creature and creation.(1158.9) 105:5.9 These, then, are the two original manifestations: the constitutively perfect and the evolutionally perfected. The two are co-ordinate in eternity relationships, but within the limits of time they are seemingly different. A time factor means growth to that which grows; secondary finites grow; hence those that are growing must appear as incomplete in time. But these differences, which are so important this side of Paradise, are nonexistent in eternity.(1158.10) 105:5.10 We speak of the perfect and the perfected as primary and secondary maximums, but there is still another type: Trinitizing and other relationships between the primaries and the secondaries result in the appearance of tertiary maximums — things, meanings, and values that are neither perfect nor perfected yet are co-ordinate with both ancestral factors.6. Repercussions of Finite Reality(1159.1) 105:6.1 The entire promulgation of finite existences represents a transference from potentials to actuals within the absolute associations of functional infinity. Of the many repercussions to creative actualization of the finite, there may be cited:(1159.2) 105:6.2 1. The deity response, the appearance of the three levels of experiential supremacy: the actuality of personal-spirit supremacy in Havona, the potential for personal-power supremacy in the grand universe to be, and the capacity for some unknown function of experiential mind acting on some level of supremacy in the future master universe.(1159.3) 105:6.3 2. The universe response involved an activation of the architectural plans for the superuniverse space level, and this evolution is still progressing throughout the physical organization of the seven superuniverses.(1159.4) 105:6.4 3. The creature repercussion to finite-reality promulgation resulted in the appearance of perfect beings on the order of the eternal inhabitants of Havona and of perfected evolutionary ascenders from the seven superuniverses. But to attain perfection as an evolutionary (time-creative) experience implies something other-than-perfection as a point of departure. Thus arises imperfection in the evolutionary creations. And this is the origin of potential evil. Misadaptation, disharmony, and conflict, all these things are inherent in evolutionary growth, from physical universes to personal creatures.(1159.5) 105:6.5 4. The divinity response to the imperfection inherent in the time lag of evolution is disclosed in the compensating presence of God the Sevenfold, by whose activities that which is perfecting is integrated with both the perfect and the perfected. This time lag is inseparable from evolution, which is creativity in time. Because of it, as well as for other reasons, the almighty power of the Supreme is predicated on the divinity successes of God the Sevenfold. This time lag makes possible creature participation in divine creation by permitting creature personalities to become partners with Deity in the attainment of maximum development. Even the material mind of the mortal creature thus becomes partner with the divine Adjuster in the dualization of the immortal soul. God the Sevenfold also provides techniques of compensation for the experiential limitations of inherent perfection as well as compensating the preascension limitations of imperfection.7. Eventuation of Transcendentals(1159.6) 105:7.1 Transcendentals are subinfinite and subabsolute but superfinite and supercreatural. Transcendentals eventuate as an integrating level correlating the supervalues of absolutes with the maximum values of finites. From the creature standpoint, that which is transcendental would appear to have eventuated as a consequence of the finite; from the eternity viewpoint, in anticipation of the finite; and there are those who have considered it as a “pre-echo” of the finite.(1159.7) 105:7.2 That which is transcendental is not necessarily nondevelopmental, but it is superevolutional in the finite sense; neither is it nonexperiential, but it is superexperience as such is meaningful to creatures. Perhaps the best illustration of such a paradox is the central universe of perfection: It is hardly absolute — only the Paradise Isle is truly absolute in the “materialized” sense. Neither is it a finite evolutionary creation as are the seven superuniverses. Havona is eternal but not changeless in the sense of being a universe of nongrowth. It is inhabited by creatures (Havona natives) who never were actually created, for they are eternally existent. Havona thus illustrates something which is not exactly finite nor yet absolute. Havona further acts as a buffer between absolute Paradise and finite creations, still further illustrating the function of transcendentals. But Havona itself is not a transcendental — it is Havona.(1160.1) 105:7.3 As the Supreme is associated with finites, so the Ultimate is identified with transcendentals. But though we thus compare Supreme and Ultimate, they differ by something more than degree; the difference is also a matter of quality. The Ultimate is something more than a super-Supreme projected on the transcendental level. The Ultimate is all of that, but more: The Ultimate is an eventuation of new Deity realities, the qualification of new phases of the theretofore unqualified.(1160.2) 105:7.4 Among those realities which are associated with the transcendental level are the following:(1160.3) 105:7.5 1. The Deity presence of the Ultimate.(1160.4) 105:7.6 2. The concept of the master universe.(1160.5) 105:7.7 3. The Architects of the Master Universe.(1160.6) 105:7.8 4. The two orders of Paradise force organizers.(1160.7) 105:7.9 5. Certain modifications in space potency.(1160.8) 105:7.10 6. Certain values of spirit.(1160.9) 105:7.11 7. Certain meanings of mind.(1160.10) 105:7.12 8. Absonite qualities and realities.(1160.11) 105:7.13 9. Omnipotence, omniscience, and omnipresence.(1160.12) 105:7.14 10. Space.(1160.13) 105:7.15 The universe in which we now live may be thought of as existing on finite, transcendental, and absolute levels. This is the cosmic stage on which is enacted the endless drama of personality performance and energy metamorphosis.(1160.14) 105:7.16 And all of these manifold realities are unified absolutely by the several triunities, functionally by the Architects of the Master Universe, and relatively by the Seven Master Spirits, the subsupreme co-ordinators of the divinity of God the Sevenfold.(1160.15) 105:7.17 God the Sevenfold represents the personality and divinity revelation of the Universal Father to creatures of both maximum and submaximum status, but there are other sevenfold relationships of the First Source and Center which do not pertain to the manifestation of the divine spiritual ministry of the God who is spirit.(1160.16) 105:7.18 In the eternity of the past the forces of the Absolutes, the spirits of the Deities, and the personalities of the Gods stirred in response to the primordial self-will of self-existent self-will. In this universe age we are all witnessing the stupendous repercussions of the far-flung cosmic panorama of the subabsolute manifestations of the limitless potentials of all these realities. And it is altogether possible that the continued diversification of the original reality of the First Source and Center may proceed onward and outward throughout age upon age, on and on, into the faraway and inconceivable stretches of absolute infinity.(1161.1) 105:7.19 [Presented by a Melchizedek of Nebadon.]
-
The Adjuster and the Soul(1215.1) 111:0.1 THE presence of the divine Adjuster in the human mind makes it forever impossible for either science or philosophy to attain a satisfactory comprehension of the evolving soul of the human personality. The morontia soul is the child of the universe and may be really known only through cosmic insight and spiritual discovery.(1215.2) 111:0.2 The concept of a soul and of an indwelling spirit is not new to Urantia; it has frequently appeared in the various systems of planetary beliefs. Many of the Oriental as well as some of the Occidental faiths have perceived that man is divine in heritage as well as human in inheritance. The feeling of the inner presence in addition to the external omnipresence of Deity has long formed a part of many Urantian religions. Men have long believed that there is something growing within the human nature, something vital that is destined to endure beyond the short span of temporal life.(1215.3) 111:0.3 Before man realized that his evolving soul was fathered by a divine spirit, it was thought to reside in different physical organs — the eye, liver, kidney, heart, and later, the brain. The savage associated the soul with blood, breath, shadows and with reflections of the self in water.(1215.4) 111:0.4 In the conception of the atman the Hindu teachers really approximated an appreciation of the nature and presence of the Adjuster, but they failed to distinguish the copresence of the evolving and potentially immortal soul. The Chinese, however, recognized two aspects of a human being, the yang and the yin, the soul and the spirit. The Egyptians and many African tribes also believed in two factors, the ka and the ba; the soul was not usually believed to be pre-existent, only the spirit.*(1215.5) 111:0.5 The inhabitants of the Nile valley believed that each favored individual had bestowed upon him at birth, or soon thereafter, a protecting spirit which they called the ka. They taught that this guardian spirit remained with the mortal subject throughout life and passed before him into the future estate. On the walls of a temple at Luxor, where is depicted the birth of Amenhotep III, the little prince is pictured on the arm of the Nile god, and near him is another child, in appearance identical with the prince, which is a symbol of that entity which the Egyptians called the ka. This sculpture was completed in the fifteenth century before Christ.(1215.6) 111:0.6 The ka was thought to be a superior spirit genius which desired to guide the associated mortal soul into the better paths of temporal living but more especially to influence the fortunes of the human subject in the hereafter. When an Egyptian of this period died, it was expected that his ka would be waiting for him on the other side of the Great River. At first, only kings were supposed to have kas, but presently all righteous men were believed to possess them. One Egyptian ruler, speaking of the ka within his heart, said: “I did not disregard its speech; I feared to transgress its guidance. I prospered thereby greatly; I was thus successful by reason of that which it caused me to do; I was distinguished by its guidance.” Many believed that the ka was “an oracle from God in everybody.” Many believed that they were to “spend eternity in gladness of heart in the favor of the God that is in you.”(1216.1) 111:0.7 Every race of evolving Urantia mortals has a word equivalent to the concept of soul. Many primitive peoples believed the soul looked out upon the world through human eyes; therefore did they so cravenly fear the malevolence of the evil eye. They have long believed that “the spirit of man is the lamp of the Lord.” The Rig-Veda says: “My mind speaks to my heart.”1. The Mind Arena of Choice(1216.2) 111:1.1 Though the work of Adjusters is spiritual in nature, they must, perforce, do all their work upon an intellectual foundation. Mind is the human soil from which the spirit Monitor must evolve the morontia soul with the co-operation of the indwelt personality.(1216.3) 111:1.2 There is a cosmic unity in the several mind levels of the universe of universes. Intellectual selves have their origin in the cosmic mind much as nebulae take origin in the cosmic energies of universe space. On the human (hence personal) level of intellectual selves the potential of spirit evolution becomes dominant, with the assent of the mortal mind, because of the spiritual endowments of the human personality together with the creative presence of an entity-point of absolute value in such human selves. But such a spirit dominance of the material mind is conditioned upon two experiences: This mind must have evolved up through the ministry of the seven adjutant mind-spirits, and the material (personal) self must choose to co-operate with the indwelling Adjuster in creating and fostering the morontia self, the evolutionary and potentially immortal soul.(1216.4) 111:1.3 Material mind is the arena in which human personalities live, are self-conscious, make decisions, choose God or forsake him, eternalize or destroy themselves.(1216.5) 111:1.4 Material evolution has provided you a life machine, your body; the Father himself has endowed you with the purest spirit reality known in the universe, your Thought Adjuster. But into your hands, subject to your own decisions, has been given mind, and it is by mind that you live or die. It is within this mind and with this mind that you make those moral decisions which enable you to achieve Adjusterlikeness, and that is Godlikeness.(1216.6) 111:1.5 Mortal mind is a temporary intellect system loaned to human beings for use during a material lifetime, and as they use this mind, they are either accepting or rejecting the potential of eternal existence. Mind is about all you have of universe reality that is subject to your will, and the soul — the morontia self — will faithfully portray the harvest of the temporal decisions which the mortal self is making. Human consciousness rests gently upon the electrochemical mechanism below and delicately touches the spirit-morontia energy system above. Of neither of these two systems is the human being ever completely conscious in his mortal life; therefore must he work in mind, of which he is conscious. And it is not so much what mind comprehends as what mind desires to comprehend that insures survival; it is not so much what mind is like as what mind is striving to be like that constitutes spirit identification. It is not so much that man is conscious of God as that man yearns for God that results in universe ascension. What you are today is not so important as what you are becoming day by day and in eternity.(1217.1) 111:1.6 Mind is the cosmic instrument on which the human will can play the discords of destruction, or upon which this same human will can bring forth the exquisite melodies of God identification and consequent eternal survival. The Adjuster bestowed upon man is, in the last analysis, impervious to evil and incapable of sin, but mortal mind can actually be twisted, distorted, and rendered evil and ugly by the sinful machinations of a perverse and self-seeking human will. Likewise can this mind be made noble, beautiful, true, and good — actually great — in accordance with the spirit-illuminated will of a God-knowing human being.(1217.2) 111:1.7 Evolutionary mind is only fully stable and dependable when manifesting itself upon the two extremes of cosmic intellectuality — the wholly mechanized and the entirely spiritualized. Between the intellectual extremes of pure mechanical control and true spirit nature there intervenes that enormous group of evolving and ascending minds whose stability and tranquillity are dependent upon personality choice and spirit identification.(1217.3) 111:1.8 But man does not passively, slavishly, surrender his will to the Adjuster. Rather does he actively, positively, and co-operatively choose to follow the Adjuster’s leading when and as such leading consciously differs from the desires and impulses of the natural mortal mind. The Adjusters manipulate but never dominate man’s mind against his will; to the Adjusters the human will is supreme. And they so regard and respect it while they strive to achieve the spiritual goals of thought adjustment and character transformation in the almost limitless arena of the evolving human intellect.(1217.4) 111:1.9 Mind is your ship, the Adjuster is your pilot, the human will is captain. The master of the mortal vessel should have the wisdom to trust the divine pilot to guide the ascending soul into the morontia harbors of eternal survival. Only by selfishness, slothfulness, and sinfulness can the will of man reject the guidance of such a loving pilot and eventually wreck the mortal career upon the evil shoals of rejected mercy and upon the rocks of embraced sin. With your consent, this faithful pilot will safely carry you across the barriers of time and the handicaps of space to the very source of the divine mind and on beyond, even to the Paradise Father of Adjusters.2. Nature of the Soul(1217.5) 111:2.1 Throughout the mind functions of cosmic intelligence, the totality of mind is dominant over the parts of intellectual function. Mind, in its essence, is functional unity; therefore does mind never fail to manifest this constitutive unity, even when hampered and hindered by the unwise actions and choices of a misguided self. And this unity of mind invariably seeks for spirit co-ordination on all levels of its association with selves of will dignity and ascension prerogatives.(1217.6) 111:2.2 The material mind of mortal man is the cosmic loom that carries the morontia fabrics on which the indwelling Thought Adjuster threads the spirit patterns of a universe character of enduring values and divine meanings — a surviving soul of ultimate destiny and unending career, a potential finaliter.(1218.1) 111:2.3 The human personality is identified with mind and spirit held together in functional relationship by life in a material body. This functioning relationship of such mind and spirit does not result in some combination of the qualities or attributes of mind and spirit but rather in an entirely new, original, and unique universe value of potentially eternal endurance, the soul.(1218.2) 111:2.4 There are three and not two factors in the evolutionary creation of such an immortal soul. These three antecedents of the morontia human soul are:(1218.3) 111:2.5 1. The human mind and all cosmic influences antecedent thereto and impinging thereon.(1218.4) 111:2.6 2. The divine spirit indwelling this human mind and all potentials inherent in such a fragment of absolute spirituality together with all associated spiritual influences and factors in human life.(1218.5) 111:2.7 3. The relationship between material mind and divine spirit, which connotes a value and carries a meaning not found in either of the contributing factors to such an association. The reality of this unique relationship is neither material nor spiritual but morontial. It is the soul.(1218.6) 111:2.8 The midway creatures have long denominated this evolving soul of man the mid-mind in contradistinction to the lower or material mind and the higher or cosmic mind. This mid-mind is really a morontia phenomenon since it exists in the realm between the material and the spiritual. The potential of such a morontia evolution is inherent in the two universal urges of mind: the impulse of the finite mind of the creature to know God and attain the divinity of the Creator, and the impulse of the infinite mind of the Creator to know man and attain the experience of the creature.(1218.7) 111:2.9 This supernal transaction of evolving the immortal soul is made possible because the mortal mind is first personal and second is in contact with superanimal realities; it possesses a supermaterial endowment of cosmic ministry which insures the evolution of a moral nature capable of making moral decisions, thereby effecting a bona fide creative contact with the associated spiritual ministries and with the indwelling Thought Adjuster.(1218.8) 111:2.10 The inevitable result of such a contactual spiritualization of the human mind is the gradual birth of a soul, the joint offspring of an adjutant mind dominated by a human will that craves to know God, working in liaison with the spiritual forces of the universe which are under the overcontrol of an actual fragment of the very God of all creation — the Mystery Monitor. And thus does the material and mortal reality of the self transcend the temporal limitations of the physical-life machine and attain a new expression and a new identification in the evolving vehicle for selfhood continuity, the morontia and immortal soul.3. The Evolving Soul(1218.9) 111:3.1 The mistakes of mortal mind and the errors of human conduct may markedly delay the evolution of the soul, although they cannot inhibit such a morontia phenomenon when once it has been initiated by the indwelling Adjuster with the consent of the creature will. But at any time prior to mortal death this same material and human will is empowered to rescind such a choice and to reject survival. Even after survival the ascending mortal still retains this prerogative of choosing to reject eternal life; at any time before fusion with the Adjuster the evolving and ascending creature can choose to forsake the will of the Paradise Father. Fusion with the Adjuster signalizes the fact that the ascending mortal has eternally and unreservedly chosen to do the Father’s will.(1219.1) 111:3.2 During the life in the flesh the evolving soul is enabled to reinforce the supermaterial decisions of the mortal mind. The soul, being supermaterial, does not of itself function on the material level of human experience. Neither can this subspiritual soul, without the collaboration of some spirit of Deity, such as the Adjuster, function above the morontia level. Neither does the soul make final decisions until death or translation divorces it from material association with the mortal mind except when and as this material mind delegates such authority freely and willingly to such a morontia soul of associated function. During life the mortal will, the personality power of decision-choice, is resident in the material mind circuits; as terrestrial mortal growth proceeds, this self, with its priceless powers of choice, becomes increasingly identified with the emerging morontia-soul entity; after death and following the mansion world resurrection, the human personality is completely identified with the morontia self. The soul is thus the embryo of the future morontia vehicle of personality identity.(1219.2) 111:3.3 This immortal soul is at first wholly morontia in nature, but it possesses such a capacity for development that it invariably ascends to the true spirit levels of fusion value with the spirits of Deity, usually with the same spirit of the Universal Father that initiated such a creative phenomenon in the creature mind.(1219.3) 111:3.4 Both the human mind and the divine Adjuster are conscious of the presence and differential nature of the evolving soul — the Adjuster fully, the mind partially. The soul becomes increasingly conscious of both the mind and the Adjuster as associated identities, proportional to its own evolutionary growth. The soul partakes of the qualities of both the human mind and the divine spirit but persistently evolves toward augmentation of spirit control and divine dominance through the fostering of a mind function whose meanings seek to co-ordinate with true spirit value.(1219.4) 111:3.5 The mortal career, the soul’s evolution, is not so much a probation as an education. Faith in the survival of supreme values is the core of religion; genuine religious experience consists in the union of supreme values and cosmic meanings as a realization of universal reality.(1219.5) 111:3.6 Mind knows quantity, reality, meanings. But quality — values — is felt. That which feels is the mutual creation of mind, which knows, and the associated spirit, which reality-izes.(1219.6) 111:3.7 In so far as man’s evolving morontia soul becomes permeated by truth, beauty, and goodness as the value-realization of God-consciousness, such a resultant being becomes indestructible. If there is no survival of eternal values in the evolving soul of man, then mortal existence is without meaning, and life itself is a tragic illusion. But it is forever true: What you begin in time you will assuredly finish in eternity — if it is worth finishing.4. The Inner Life(1219.7) 111:4.1 Recognition is the intellectual process of fitting the sensory impressions received from the external world into the memory patterns of the individual. Understanding connotes that these recognized sensory impressions and their associated memory patterns have become integrated or organized into a dynamic network of principles.(1220.1) 111:4.2 Meanings are derived from a combination of recognition and understanding. Meanings are nonexistent in a wholly sensory or material world. Meanings and values are only perceived in the inner or supermaterial spheres of human experience.(1220.2) 111:4.3 The advances of true civilization are all born in this inner world of mankind. It is only the inner life that is truly creative. Civilization can hardly progress when the majority of the youth of any generation devote their interests and energies to the materialistic pursuits of the sensory or outer world.(1220.3) 111:4.4 The inner and the outer worlds have a different set of values. Any civilization is in jeopardy when three quarters of its youth enter materialistic professions and devote themselves to the pursuit of the sensory activities of the outer world. Civilization is in danger when youth neglect to interest themselves in ethics, sociology, eugenics, philosophy, the fine arts, religion, and cosmology.(1220.4) 111:4.5 Only in the higher levels of the superconscious mind as it impinges upon the spirit realm of human experience can you find those higher concepts in association with effective master patterns which will contribute to the building of a better and more enduring civilization. Personality is inherently creative, but it thus functions only in the inner life of the individual.(1220.5) 111:4.6 Snow crystals are always hexagonal in form, but no two are ever alike. Children conform to types, but no two are exactly alike, even in the case of twins. Personality follows types but is always unique.(1220.6) 111:4.7 Happiness and joy take origin in the inner life. You cannot experience real joy all by yourself. A solitary life is fatal to happiness. Even families and nations will enjoy life more if they share it with others.(1220.7) 111:4.8 You cannot completely control the external world — environment. It is the creativity of the inner world that is most subject to your direction because there your personality is so largely liberated from the fetters of the laws of antecedent causation. There is associated with personality a limited sovereignty of will.(1220.8) 111:4.9 Since this inner life of man is truly creative, there rests upon each person the responsibility of choosing as to whether this creativity shall be spontaneous and wholly haphazard or controlled, directed, and constructive. How can a creative imagination produce worthy children when the stage whereon it functions is already preoccupied by prejudice, hate, fears, resentments, revenge, and bigotries?(1220.9) 111:4.10 Ideas may take origin in the stimuli of the outer world, but ideals are born only in the creative realms of the inner world. Today the nations of the world are directed by men who have a superabundance of ideas, but they are poverty-stricken in ideals. That is the explanation of poverty, divorce, war, and racial hatreds.(1220.10) 111:4.11 This is the problem: If freewill man is endowed with the powers of creativity in the inner man, then must we recognize that freewill creativity embraces the potential of freewill destructivity. And when creativity is turned to destructivity, you are face to face with the devastation of evil and sin — oppression, war, and destruction. Evil is a partiality of creativity which tends toward disintegration and eventual destruction. All conflict is evil in that it inhibits the creative function of the inner life — it is a species of civil war in the personality.(1221.1) 111:4.12 Inner creativity contributes to ennoblement of character through personality integration and selfhood unification. It is forever true: The past is unchangeable; only the future can be changed by the ministry of the present creativity of the inner self.5. The Consecration of Choice(1221.2) 111:5.1 The doing of the will of God is nothing more or less than an exhibition of creature willingness to share the inner life with God — with the very God who has made such a creature life of inner meaning-value possible. Sharing is Godlike — divine. God shares all with the Eternal Son and the Infinite Spirit, while they, in turn, share all things with the divine Sons and spirit Daughters of the universes.(1221.3) 111:5.2 The imitation of God is the key to perfection; the doing of his will is the secret of survival and of perfection in survival.(1221.4) 111:5.3 Mortals live in God, and so God has willed to live in mortals. As men trust themselves to him, so has he — and first — trusted a part of himself to be with men; has consented to live in men and to indwell men subject to the human will.(1221.5) 111:5.4 Peace in this life, survival in death, perfection in the next life, service in eternity — all these are achieved (in spirit) now when the creature personality consents — chooses — to subject the creature will to the Father’s will. And already has the Father chosen to make a fragment of himself subject to the will of the creature personality.(1221.6) 111:5.5 Such a creature choice is not a surrender of will. It is a consecration of will, an expansion of will, a glorification of will, a perfecting of will; and such choosing raises the creature will from the level of temporal significance to that higher estate wherein the personality of the creature son communes with the personality of the spirit Father.(1221.7) 111:5.6 This choosing of the Father’s will is the spiritual finding of the spirit Father by mortal man, even though an age must pass before the creature son may actually stand in the factual presence of God on Paradise. This choosing does not so much consist in the negation of creature will — “Not my will but yours be done” — as it consists in the creature’s positive affirmation: “It is my will that your will be done.” And if this choice is made, sooner or later will the God-choosing son find inner union (fusion) with the indwelling God fragment, while this same perfecting son will find supreme personality satisfaction in the worship communion of the personality of man and the personality of his Maker, two personalities whose creative attributes have eternally joined in self-willed mutuality of expression — the birth of another eternal partnership of the will of man and the will of God.6. The Human Paradox(1221.8) 111:6.1 Many of the temporal troubles of mortal man grow out of his twofold relation to the cosmos. Man is a part of nature — he exists in nature — and yet he is able to transcend nature. Man is finite, but he is indwelt by a spark of infinity. Such a dual situation not only provides the potential for evil but also engenders many social and moral situations fraught with much uncertainty and not a little anxiety.(1222.1) 111:6.2 The courage required to effect the conquest of nature and to transcend one’s self is a courage that might succumb to the temptations of self-pride. The mortal who can transcend self might yield to the temptation to deify his own self-consciousness. The mortal dilemma consists in the double fact that man is in bondage to nature while at the same time he possesses a unique liberty — freedom of spiritual choice and action. On material levels man finds himself subservient to nature, while on spiritual levels he is triumphant over nature and over all things temporal and finite. Such a paradox is inseparable from temptation, potential evil, decisional errors, and when self becomes proud and arrogant, sin may evolve.(1222.2) 111:6.3 The problem of sin is not self-existent in the finite world. The fact of finiteness is not evil or sinful. The finite world was made by an infinite Creator — it is the handiwork of his divine Sons — and therefore it must be good. It is the misuse, distortion, and perversion of the finite that gives origin to evil and sin.(1222.3) 111:6.4 The spirit can dominate mind; so mind can control energy. But mind can control energy only through its own intelligent manipulation of the metamorphic potentials inherent in the mathematical level of the causes and effects of the physical domains. Creature mind does not inherently control energy; that is a Deity prerogative. But creature mind can and does manipulate energy just in so far as it has become master of the energy secrets of the physical universe.(1222.4) 111:6.5 When man wishes to modify physical reality, be it himself or his environment, he succeeds to the extent that he has discovered the ways and means of controlling matter and directing energy. Unaided mind is impotent to influence anything material save its own physical mechanism, with which it is inescapably linked. But through the intelligent use of the body mechanism, mind can create other mechanisms, even energy relationships and living relationships, by the utilization of which this mind can increasingly control and even dominate its physical level in the universe.(1222.5) 111:6.6 Science is the source of facts, and mind cannot operate without facts. They are the building blocks in the construction of wisdom which are cemented together by life experience. Man can find the love of God without facts, and man can discover the laws of God without love, but man can never begin to appreciate the infinite symmetry, the supernal harmony, the exquisite repleteness of the all-inclusive nature of the First Source and Center until he has found divine law and divine love and has experientially unified these in his own evolving cosmic philosophy.(1222.6) 111:6.7 The expansion of material knowledge permits a greater intellectual appreciation of the meanings of ideas and the values of ideals. A human being can find truth in his inner experience, but he needs a clear knowledge of facts to apply his personal discovery of truth to the ruthlessly practical demands of everyday life.(1222.7) 111:6.8 It is only natural that mortal man should be harassed by feelings of insecurity as he views himself inextricably bound to nature while he possesses spiritual powers wholly transcendent to all things temporal and finite. Only religious confidence — living faith — can sustain man amid such difficult and perplexing problems.(1223.1) 111:6.9 Of all the dangers which beset man’s mortal nature and jeopardize his spiritual integrity, pride is the greatest. Courage is valorous, but egotism is vainglorious and suicidal. Reasonable self-confidence is not to be deplored. Man’s ability to transcend himself is the one thing which distinguishes him from the animal kingdom.(1223.2) 111:6.10 Pride is deceitful, intoxicating, and sin-breeding whether found in an individual, a group, a race, or a nation. It is literally true, “Pride goes before a fall.”7. The Adjuster’s Problem(1223.3) 111:7.1 Uncertainty with security is the essence of the Paradise adventure — uncertainty in time and in mind, uncertainty as to the events of the unfolding Paradise ascent; security in spirit and in eternity, security in the unqualified trust of the creature son in the divine compassion and infinite love of the Universal Father; uncertainty as an inexperienced citizen of the universe; security as an ascending son in the universe mansions of an all-powerful, all-wise, and all-loving Father.(1223.4) 111:7.2 May I admonish you to heed the distant echo of the Adjuster’s faithful call to your soul? The indwelling Adjuster cannot stop or even materially alter your career struggle of time; the Adjuster cannot lessen the hardships of life as you journey on through this world of toil. The divine indweller can only patiently forbear while you fight the battle of life as it is lived on your planet; but you could, if you only would — as you work and worry, as you fight and toil — permit the valiant Adjuster to fight with you and for you. You could be so comforted and inspired, so enthralled and intrigued, if you would only allow the Adjuster constantly to bring forth the pictures of the real motive, the final aim, and the eternal purpose of all this difficult, uphill struggle with the commonplace problems of your present material world.(1223.5) 111:7.3 Why do you not aid the Adjuster in the task of showing you the spiritual counterpart of all these strenuous material efforts? Why do you not allow the Adjuster to strengthen you with the spiritual truths of cosmic power while you wrestle with the temporal difficulties of creature existence? Why do you not encourage the heavenly helper to cheer you with the clear vision of the eternal outlook of universal life as you gaze in perplexity at the problems of the passing hour? Why do you refuse to be enlightened and inspired by the universe viewpoint while you toil amidst the handicaps of time and flounder in the maze of uncertainties which beset your mortal life journey? Why not allow the Adjuster to spiritualize your thinking, even though your feet must tread the material paths of earthly endeavor?(1223.6) 111:7.4 The higher human races of Urantia are complexly admixed; they are a blend of many races and stocks of different origin. This composite nature renders it exceedingly difficult for the Monitors to work efficiently during life and adds definitely to the problems of both the Adjuster and the guardian seraphim after death. Not long since I was present on Salvington and heard a guardian of destiny present a formal statement in extenuation of the difficulties of ministering to her mortal subject. This seraphim said:(1223.7) 111:7.5 “Much of my difficulty was due to the unending conflict between the two natures of my subject: the urge of ambition opposed by animal indolence; the ideals of a superior people crossed by the instincts of an inferior race; the high purposes of a great mind antagonized by the urge of a primitive inheritance; the long-distance view of a far-seeing Monitor counteracted by the nearsightedness of a creature of time; the progressive plans of an ascending being modified by the desires and longings of a material nature; the flashes of universe intelligence cancelled by the chemical-energy mandates of the evolving race; the urge of angels opposed by the emotions of an animal; the training of an intellect annulled by the tendencies of instinct; the experience of the individual opposed by the accumulated propensities of the race; the aims of the best overshadowed by the drift of the worst; the flight of genius neutralized by the gravity of mediocrity; the progress of the good retarded by the inertia of the bad; the art of the beautiful besmirched by the presence of evil; the buoyancy of health neutralized by the debility of disease; the fountain of faith polluted by the poisons of fear; the spring of joy embittered by the waters of sorrow; the gladness of anticipation disillusioned by the bitterness of realization; the joys of living ever threatened by the sorrows of death. Such a life on such a planet! And yet, because of the ever-present help and urge of the Thought Adjuster, this soul did achieve a fair degree of happiness and success and has even now ascended to the judgment halls of mansonia.”(1224.1) 111:7.6 [Presented by a Solitary Messenger of Orvonton.]
-
Our culture can have a strong effect on the way we see ourselves and our role in society, especially between gender and sex. The messages men receive within our culture usually reinforce the “rough and tough” advice that's been passed down through generations, and often times, shows up within their relationships with others.
Listen in with guest speaker, Dave Cavnar as he reminds us why self-love isn't just for women. He shares his story honestly and provides insight into nourishing yourself first, along with tips to get started. This one’s deep, so grab a friend or take note, you'll want to share these insights with all the men in your life.
Why men need self-loving self-care too
How silence can teach us about ourselves
Why being selfish is an important part of self-care
Links Mentioned:
The Rhythm of Life (book) by Matthew Kelly, https://www.amazon.com/Rhythm-Life-Matthew-Kelly/dp/1942611404
Into the Wild (book) by Jon Krakauer, https://www.amazon.com/Into-Wild-Jon-Krakauer/dp/0385486804
5 for Love: Free Self-Loving Self-Care video series, www.groundedhere.com/5
Dave Cavnar’s website, https://davidcavnar.com
Show Highlights:1:30 Easeful Living Practice: Writing Exercise
3:40 “Love, Rest” Poem by Andrea Catherine
7:10 Interview with Dave Cavnar begins
10:50 Difference between self-love and selfishness. Is there?
15:10 Mentality of scarcity vs abundance
17:29 Energy shifts between selfish and selfless: Seeing both as opportunities to receive
23:00 Spirituality and the intersection of self. Loving ourselves as a step to loving others
27:15 Self-focus without self-love. Our “self” as always under construction
31:05 The journey of self-love: Perfection, judgment, human kindness, and forgiveness
37:00 Self-love for men: Dave’s story of coming home to himself
45:21 New messages for young men: “What story do you want to tell?”
49:50 Ways to encourage and nourish yourself: Tips to get started
57:00 Continuing to build connection
61:50 Courageous Self-Care Tip: “Enter the classroom of silence”
63:55 Andrea shares...and how you can start living the life you want
Favorite Quotes:“Self-love is recognizing that...you can put yourself first.” - Dave Cavnar
“When you're truly embracing the idea that you're complete and you know yourself fully, then you can benefit those around you.” - Dave Cavnar
“...being self-focused without actually feeling self-love.” - Andrea Catherine
“Just because you're under construction, doesn't mean you're not complete.” - Dave Cavnar
“If your cup is empty, you can't share what you don't have.” -Dave Cavnar
“...when I forgive myself or others, it frees me up from being attached to the action and the association I have with that action.” - Andrea Catherine
“In reality, there's nothing more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future.” - Christopher McCandless
“Move. Learn. Breathe. Repeat.” -Dave Cavnar
“You have to enter the classroom of silence.” - Matthew Kelly
Meet Dave:Dave Cavnar is a self-described doodler, learner & ponderer. He is fascinated by consciousness, purpose, Soul, and each of our individual paths. Currently you can find him falling in love with himself and his life on instagram @dvcavnar and you can read the first few chapters of Being Human / Human Being on his website https://davidcavnar.com/
-
Do you have self-doubt? I'm sure you do - we all do at some point in our lives.
Does this describe you?
You have an idea for a business, but you give up before you even try, because you convince yourself that no one will like your idea.
You want to ask your boss for a promotion, but you don't because you just know that he'll laugh in your face.
You have, what you think, is helpful information for your group presentation at school, but you remain quiet because you are afraid of looking stupid.
Giving up, not starting, or remaining quiet is often the result of self-doubts.
Have you been there? Have you had self-doubt about something in your life?
Sure you have - we all have.
I had self-doubts about starting my podcast show.
I had doubts that I knew what I was doing or how to launch a podcast.
I had doubts that anyone would listen to me.
I had doubts that my podcast would be helpful at all.
Our self-doubts can keep us from so many things:
FriendshipsCareer AdvancementReaching your full potentialWorking towards a dreamSelf-doubt robs you of self-confidence. Self-doubt is the antithesis of self-confidence. You can't have both. You will either have self-doubt or you'll have self-confidence.
This means that if you can work on overcoming self-doubt your confidence level will increase.
3 Steps To Overcoming Self-Doubt
1. Tell someone you have self-doubts
2. Be a student of what you are trying to learn
3. Step out on faith. Don't confuse failing with being a failure
Don't confuse failing with being a failure!
Find someone to hold you accountable for working on your self-doubt. Self-doubt almost always grows when you give in to it.
When you allow your self-doubt to keep you from what you really want in life it will grow and attach itself to you.
The more you give into it, the more you feed it, and the more you feed it bigger it will be, the bigger it gets the harder it will be to overcome it.
So, find someone to help you in your journey of self-confidence.
This is not something you should do alone. You and I need someone that we can be vulnerable to and for them to be vulnerable to us. Learn more about John Cordray at www.johncordray.com
Smells Like Humans Like listening to funny friends discuss curious human behavior.
Listen on: Apple Podcasts Spotify
Support the show
Rate the show: If you enjoyed this episode, please consider providing an honest rating of the show here www.mentalhealthtodayshow.com/reviews/new .
Disclaimer: The Mental Health Today Show is for educational purposes only and should not be interpreted as therapy. If you are seeking therapy, please contact a licensed therapist for help.
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy -
At a recent business event I had 30 seconds to introduce myself and what I did. This is the so-called elevator pitch and it’s not as easy as you might think. Having seen how some people were struggling to get their description done in 5 minutes let alone 30 seconds it was suggested we use the quick little formula – I help …. To …. By…. I was the next one up so I sat there and said:
“I help people make changes in their life or business by managing their minds”.
It worked because everyone went ‘oooohhh’ and wanted to know what does that actually mean and how do you that.
And it got me thinking that it's a long time since we've actually talked about what it is we actually do or rather the idea behind what we actually do.
So today we're going to put that right because we’re going back to basics and thinking about what fundamentally underpins everything we talk about at Brilliant Living HQ. It’s also the subject matter of my Changeability book and underpins the whole Changeability process and practice and Brilliant Living products.
It is mind management!
What is mind management?The key question is what is mind management and why do we all need it.
At it’s most basic level mind management is about managing your mind.
Which maybe isn’t saying much – or more like it’s saying the same thing twice – there’s a nice word for that – tautology!
But mind management is about managing your mind and we’re very keen on the whole idea of it.
Our strap line here at Brilliant Living HQ is ‘Mind management for your best life and business’ or at least it was until we changed our site recently – we thought our logo looked better without it but maybe we should put it back somewhere so people know what it’s about!
And the strapline to our podcast (and the Changeability book) is ‘Manage your Mind – Change your Life’.
Why the obsession with mind management – what lies behind it?
Mind management is the idea you can:
‘Harness the amazing power of your mind to help you get what you want in life.’
In other words you can reprogram or train your mind to create the right mindset to change what you don’t like into what you do like, and achieve your desires and live life to the full.
“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” ~ Wayne W. Dyer.
That’s a good start, but can we define it further and look at the individual elements of ‘mind management’ to get a better working definition?
How do we define mind management?The Business Dictionary defines management as:
“The organisation and coordination of the activities of a business in order to achieve defined objectives.”
The Merriam-Webster dictionary adds a useful extra dimension defining management as:
“The act or skill of controlling and making decisions about a business.”
If we take these definitions together and replace business with the mind we come up with:
“Mind management - The act or skill of controlling, organising and coordinating the activities of the mind in order to (make decisions to) achieve defined objectives.”
This does assume that you have already determined what you want from your life, and have a vision of your defined objectives (goals) and what you have to do to achieve them.
And for us that’s where it always begins – getting clear about what you want – because there are clear mind management reasons for doing this and for using the power of your brain and mind to help you achieve those goals and the changes you want. It has to start with intention plus inspiration which equal your vision or goals.
If you want to know more about that go to brillliantlivinghq.com/goals to be one of the first people to find out about our goals challenge.
So that’s the management bit. Now for the second part.
The MindThere are basically two major components of the mind - the conscious and the subconscious.
The conscious which is the bit we’re aware of – e.g. as you’re listening to this, the thoughts you’re thinking about what you want to eat or drink or what you’re doing later or reacting to what you’re hearing. This is what we think about and what we’re aware of. We tend to think of it as us – ‘this is me’ – but there is a lot more to you than that.
Your conscious mind is like the tip of the iceberg because underneath it is what’s often called your subconscious, the bit below the conscious mind. We think of it below if thinking about an iceberg – but it’s sub (as in submerged or submarine) in terms of our not being aware of it. The other name – which is probably more accurate – is the unconscious.
This is the part we’re not aware of – but keeps us alive because it carries out millions of actions every day without us even thinking about it.
Taken together these two components of your mind create what is in effect an information processing system whose purpose is to keep you functioning and alive.
The brain and mindWhen we talk about our mind we’re really using the term to describe aspects of what goes on inside our brain. People often use the two terms interchangeably but they’re not really the same thing.
There are different physical elements to our brain, which you can easily see in any diagram of the brain, but our mind is what goes on within that physical organ. Your mind is where your consciousness and personality are.
It’s a a bit like the software inside a computer. The brain is the hardware and the mind the software. But it’s not as straightforward as that as our thoughts are the result of our experiences and interpretations and feelings – so it’s more mixed.
Essentially our brains contain nerve cells (called neurons) that are connected through synapses. This is how thoughts are formed.
These neural networks or pathways can be and are strengthened by repetition. Likewise, these pathways can be consciously and unconsciously influenced and strengthened by what we do, by the influences in our lives, by the previous experiences, beliefs and values we have stored in our minds.
This is not only one of the facets or characteristics of how your mind works but is also one of the reasons why we need and want to manage our minds.
Next week we’ll be exploring this further when we talk more about exactly why you really do want mind management to be an everyday part of your life.
ChangeabilityIf really can’t wait until next week to learn more – then you will find it all neatly explained in my book Changeability: Manage your Mind – Change your Life - together with a 10 step logical framework of ten practical mind management techniques, you can start using right away. Get it here now (and it’s on special offer this week!)
Episode 87 of the Changeability PodcastYou can hear us talking about this and more in episode 87 of the Changeability Podcast.
Links:Join our free Changeability private Facebook group
Like our Brilliant Living HQ Facebook page and keep up to date
Get on our mailing list to find out what we’re up to
Buy the book of our mind management program Changeability: Manage your Mind – Change your Life – on Amazon
Thank you for reading or listeningIf you like listening to our show we would love you to leave us a review on iTunes or Stitcher – like Alex did – thanks Alex – really appreciate it!
alex 18 butterfly from the UK – October 23rd 2015
Brilliant Podcasts - 5 stars
"I look forward to listening to these podcasts in the morning on my way to work. They really help me feel positive towards the day ahead! Thank you so much for making these podcasts and please don’t stop."
-
We all want to be happy, but what is happiness; is it a skill we can learn, and what does neuroscience have to say about it?
What is happiness?What do you want in life? To be happy?
That’s what most of us want -but what is happiness and how do we get it?
The dictionary definition of happiness is
“feeling or showing pleasure or contentment”
But surely there’s more to happiness than a fleeting feeling.
Whilst happiness is relative as it means different things to different people depending on circumstance and interest, it would seem there are two distinct types of happiness.
Two types of happinessThere’s things that make us feel happy, the experiences of things we love doing and we want more of.
This is hedonia – pleasure and fun. It’s transitory, in the moment – it happens, it makes us feel happy, and then it’s gone and the moment’s passed.
Then there’s a more fundamental type of happiness. The sort of happiness which ideally underlies or underpins our lives.
It’s a state of being that comes with being content with yourself without relying on other people or external props.
This is wellbeing or ‘eudaimonia’ which captures the idea of living a meaningful life as first described by Aristotle.
This sort of happiness is more enduring.
Happiness and Brilliant LivingWhen we were thinking about the characteristics of brilliant living, we kept coming back to ideas about happiness because the characteristics of brilliant living equally apply to wellbeing and happiness. This is what we came up with for starters:
Sense of control – being in charge of one’s own destiny, choosing the life you wish to lead, and taking positive action to get it.Inner contentment – both within yourself and your relationships with the world.Purpose – you have a clear concept in mind of what you’d like to achieve in your life which is in alignment with your personal values and how you want to live your life.To love and be loved – to love oneself and also to give and receive love in its wider form, through friends, family and the intimacy of connections.Self-esteem – recognition of your own worth and a respect for others alongside a need for your own individuality.Achievement – mastery of your own talents, recognition and respect of your efforts by yourself and others.Fulfilment – experiencing and fulfilling your creative potential.The neuroscience of happinessIs there a scientific basis for understanding what makes you happy?
There’s been a lot of scientific interest over the past 10 years into what’s going on in our brains when we experience emotions such as happiness.
Developments in neuroimaging have greatly assisted this, as scientists can monitor reactions in the brain in real time.
Richard J. Davidson and Brianna S. Schuyler in an article on The Neuroscience of Happiness highlight four constituents or elements of happiness and wellbeing.
Happiness and wellbeing levels are higher when people are better able to sustain positive emotion; recover more quickly from negative experiences; engage in empathic and altruistic acts; and express high levels of mindfulness.
They looked at how long people held on to positive emotions, because studies monitoring brain functions with fMRI indicate that how long a positive response lasts indicates general levels of wellbeing and happiness.
Then how quickly they recovered when really sad things happened. This is where resilience comes in, keeping a high level of wellbeing in the face of adversity. They found recovery from negative events was a good measure of wellbeing. Happy and resilient people of course experience sadness but recover more quickly.
The next finding was that one of the strongest predictions of wellbeing is the quality of our social relationships. Add this to the fact that good social bonds are associated with better health and longer life expectancy, it’s fair to say social relationships are key to a happy and maybe longer and healthier life.
The neuroscience also highlights the importance of empathy - sharing feelings of others and compassion - feeling concern for others and a desire to improve things.
Mindfulness is the final positive indicator for wellbeing.Results of a study by Killingsworth and Gilbert where 2000 people recorded on a phone app how frequently their minds wandered and how happy or unhappy they felt at that moment, showed their minds wandered 47% of the time and they experienced significantly more unhappiness than when they were focussed on an activity – almost any activity!
Mindfulness meditation training results in a decrease in what is activated in our brains during mind wandering.
The conclusionOne of the most significant findings of the neuroscientifc evidence is these 4 constituents of wellbeing all exhibit plasticity. Which is a huge finding because it means with training and practice we can develop and transform these behaviours and ways of being.
“…data are available that indicate that some of these training regimes, even those as short as two weeks, can induce measurable changes in the brain. These findings highlight the view that happiness and well-being are best regarded as skills that can be enhanced through training.” Richard J. Davidson and Brianna S. Schuyler, The Neuroscience of Happiness
Now that is significant for all of us. We can actually increase our happiness by learning how to grow it effectively and enhance it through training. It ultimately means happiness is a skill we can train for, practice and get more of.
Episode 56 of the Changeability PodcastHear us discuss all of this and more in episode 56 of the Changeability Podcast, on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn or download or listen at the top of this page.
Links mentioned in episode 56Only days left to vote for the Changeability Podcast for Best Self-Help Podcast in the UK Podcast Awards. Voting closes 31st August 2015 and we would love your support. Many thanks if you’ve already voted.
Episode 55 on Dealing with overwhelmRichard J. Davidson and Brianna S. Schuyler The Neuroscience of Happiness, Chapter 5, The World Happiness Report 2015You can also support the show by subscribing to it on iTunes and leaving us a review on Stitcher, TuneIn or iTunes, this helps us greatly and we’ll read your review if you write to us and let us know you’ve left one – write to [email protected]
-
“Act the way you'd like to be and soon you'll be the way you'd like to act.” ~ Bob Dylan
1 year of podcastingIt’s celebrations all round at Brilliant Living HQ as we celebrate the first birthday of our offspring – the Changeability Podcast.
Podcast Award FinalistsPlus a massive bonus celebration. We’re thrilled the Changeability Podcast has been nominated as a finalist for the UK Top Self–Help Podcast Award. How wonderful is that
A huge heartfelt thank you all you marvellous people who nominated the Changeability Podcast.
And if you want to be totally fabulous all over again you can vote one more time for us until the end of August. Only one vote per IP address is allowed. Click and vote via FB, Twitter, G+ or anonymously. It’s really quick and easy!
The award ceremony will take place at New Media Europe – an amazing conference for anyone interested in digital media, podcasting, blogging, social media, business and the internet.
10 mind management techniques on the Changeability PodcastIn our first year and 53 episodes of the Changeability Podcast the theme’s been how we can manage our minds to make changes in life and be happier. We’ve looked at it through the 10 mind management techniques featured in the book, Changeability: Manage your mind - change your life.
In episode 53 of the Changeability Podcast we take a quick romp through these 10 techniques – to remind you and give you a quick overview and to share snippets from some of the shows.
Starting with this great quote – which sort of sums up the notion of change.
“If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree.” Jim Rohn
Mind managementThe idea behind mind management is we can use our minds to help make changes or have more success. If left to their own devices, our conscious and particularly subconscious minds can sabotage our best intentions and efforts.
1. Vision setting.
Get clear about your aspirations, dreams and goals, so you know where you're going.
What do you want to change, achieve, have more of, improve or do differently from now? This is the vision of your changed life and the milestone goals to get you there.
2. Taking stock.Step back to your starting point and look at what holds you back from changing what you want to change and being the person you want to be.
These are your limiting beliefs, negative self–talk and inner dialogue.
3. Clearing the ground
Having identified your limiting unhelpful beliefs, it’s time to examine and release these disempowering thoughts.
4. Empowering positive affirmations
Replace negative self-beliefs with empowering positive thoughts and affirmations, to affirm how you want to be.
5. VisualisationImagine or visualise the outcome you want. Whatever you want to change – see it in your mind’s eye as if the changes are in place – and importantly, how you got there.
6. Appreciation
Place yourself in the here and now by appreciating what you have now, on route to your changed self.
Practice appreciation to make it a daily habit, and train yourself to look for more to appreciate - you’ll find it.
7. Mindfulness Meditation
Practice mindfulness to notice being in the present moment on purpose, without judgement or criticism.
Experience the benefits of Mindfulness meditation in return for a simple focus on your breathing for a few minutes every day.
8. Action
This is where mindset meets actions and stuff happens, based on the previous techniques. Take your vision and milestone goals and break them down into actions and trigger actions, so you know what to do, can fight procrastination and build momentum.
9. Accountability
If you want to achieve your goals and boost your success, make yourself accountable because:
“Accountability separates the wishers in life from the action-takers that care enough about their future to account for their daily actions.” ~ John Di Lemme
10. Reflection and celebration
Learn from your experiences and find and take every opportunity to celebrate your successes – however small.
Episode 54 links and resourcesListen to episode 54 to hear more about the 10 techniques with excerpts for previous shows – including some of our favourite bits.
To vote for the Changeability PodcastTo attend New Media EuropeChangeability: Manage your mind - Change your life - The bookBrilliant Living HQ Facebook pageChangeability Facebook groupEpisode 53 - 6 reasons to celebrate successEpisode 3 - The Library in Your BrainEpisode 10 - The Power of GoalsEpisode 13 - Discover Your Limiting thoughts and BeliefsEpisode 15 - Letting Go of Limiting Thoughts and BeliefsEpisode 17 - The What Why and How of Positive AffirmationsEpisode 28 - Mental RehearsalEpisode 34 - Is Gratitude the Best AttitudeEpisode 43 - What is Mindfulness and Why You Need ItEpisode 44 - Manage your Mind with Mindfulness MeditationEpisode 49 - Time for ActionEpisode 50 - Be accountableBrilliant Living ShopWhat to do nextThank you for reading and listening. Please vote for the Changeability Podcast before 31st August 2015.
-
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” ~ Socrates
Nobody likes the ‘f’ word. And we’re not talking about that old Anglo-Saxon epletive some people call swearing. No, this is much worse!
This is something that absolutely nobody likes or wants to be familiar with. It’s FAILURE.
No-one wants to fail. In fact we’re programmed to avoid it where possible – or at lest to avoid what getting out of our comfort zone might do to us.
The Fear of FailureThe fear of failure runs deep in all of us.
It lurks buried in our psyche, only to raise it’s head when we want to change something in our lives or business or try something new.
It seems virtually impossible to become an adult and escape picking up a fear of failure along the way.
The fear of failure scuppers invention and enterprise; stops us fulfilling our potential and living our best life – if we let it.
We try to avoid it where we can, either by staying safe, living small within our comfortable familiar world, or by procrastinating over any action that might incur failure.
But if we want to live an examined life – if we want to reflect on our progress towards the life or business we want – then open honest reflection with ourselves is the way to go.
Many resist such honesty – either from within or from others. We don’t seek out the critique that might help us change or be more successful.
We carry on doing the same things we always do, and you know where that leads – nowhere.
“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.” Narcotics Anonymous
We like the familiar – because our subconscious wants to keep us safe and that means sticking to what we know – even when it’s not serving us well.
And facing up to things not working might make us feel like failures and that we’ve wasted the time and effort we’ve already put into it that thing. It might be years - with a job or business, or a relationships.
We shy away from failure because of what the word means to us – the negative connotations.
“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default.”
But what if instead of avoiding the ‘f’ word, we were to embrace it? Make a virtue of it? Change the way we think of it and even the very word itself.
What if you were to look at things not going as well as you’d hoped as simply feedback rather than failure.
So every time you thought about potential failure you saw it as feedback.
What if you were to reclaim the ‘f’ word in a positive context.
No need then to avoid the ‘f’ word.
“I have not failed 10,000 times. I have not failed once. I have succeeded in proving that those 10,000 ways will not work. When I have eliminated the ways that will not work, I will find the way that will work.” ~ Thomas Edison
You are like a scientist observing an experiment of honest reflection without a failure label.
If we change the way we look at failure to see it as feedback, we don’t need to be afraid of it. In fact we can totally change our whole approach to life and how we do things.
Imagine if you weren’t afraid of failing – what would you do?
The Changeability Podcast Episode 51In episode 51 of The Changeability Podcast we chat about all this and more including:
What gets in the way of reflectionWhere our fear of failure comes fromWhy it’s good and badWhat makes us procrastinateWhen we’ve been afraid of failingAvoiding the ‘F’ wordHow to reframe (even though Julian hates that word)What a difference a word makes Links mentioned in episode 51Episode 50 - Be accountableEpisode 13 - Discover your limiting thoughts and beliefsEpisode 14 - What self-beliefs hold you backEpisode 15 - Letting go of limiting thoughts and beliefsVote for usIf you like the Changeability Podcast please nominate us for a UK Podcasters’ Award at http://ukpodcasters.com/directory/podcast/changeability-podcast-manage-your-mind-change-your-life
Vote via email, Facebook or Google
If by email don’t forget to confirm the email that comes to you to verify you’re a real person.
If we’re worth it you can even nominate us once a day every day for the rest of July – which would be fantastic.
Thank you
-
“Thought and theory must precede all salutary action; yet action is nobler in itself than either thought or theory.” ~ Virginia Woolf
You know what you want, you’ve created your vision and set your goals. You’ve got in the right mindset and done the mental preparation.
You’ve planned your actions and know where to start – so what now? Well it’s time to actually do it – it’s time for action.
Planning for action is key but none of it matters if you don't put your plan into action and follow through on your goals.
Changeability is about taking action.
But it’s not a ‘running around like a headless chicken’ sort of action. It’s not being busy for the sake of it action.
It’s about managing your mind to make changes in your life, and that means it’s action based on mind management techniques.
The very techniques we talk about on The Changeability Podcast and are laid out in the Changeability: Manage your Mind – Change your Life book.
If you follow and practice these your action becomes:
Action born of your vision and goalsAction grounded in attaining the results of your visualization.Action in line with the empowering beliefs of your affirmations.Action founded on the energy generated through appreciation.Action centred in mindfulness of your present experience, making it count.Action stemming from the creativity of your subconscious.Action implemented with the clarity and focus arising from meditative practice.It’s time for action, but there’s potential traps stopping you.
ProcrastinationProcrastination is the number 1 killer of action, but what’s behind it?
Fear - Sometimes we’re afraid of either the action itself or the outcome if we achieve it, so we find other things to do to distract usUncertainty - We’re unsure what to do to get goingPerfectionist tendenciesOvercoming procrastinationExamine the thoughts and beliefs behind the fear and use affirmations to replace them with positive affirming beliefsAcknowledge the fear and get on with the actionRecognise it wont be perfect and this is a delaying tacticThink in terms of days not months or years, to bring your future self nearer to your present self and raise awareness of the price of not taking actionBusyness for the sake of busyness
Sometimes we just like to feel we’re busy. Being busy is almost addictive and makes us feel like we’re achieving something even if it’s not the actions we need to take to get us to our goals.
Set your priority and prioritise it
Make this your one thing to get done before moving on to other activities
The ‘to-do’ listSurely the most simple productivity tip of all time is the good old fashioned humble to-do list.
Try writing it by hand with a box to tick it off when completedWrite your to-do list the night before, so you can get up and get on without thinking about what you need to doAction on actionThe time for action is now – and the key is consistency and purposeful activity.
Take positive consistent action every dayAsk yourself if your actions today support your goalsThe Changeability Podcast episode 49In episode 49 of The changeability Podcast – Time for Action – we talk about all of this and more including:
What stops us taking the action (even when we think we want to take it)Tips for overcoming procrastination and being busyWhat’s going on in Kathryn’s mind when she should be taking action5 ways to help you take action everydayWhat to do when you feel stuckHow to deal with self-sabotaging thoughtsThe question you need to answer everyday“It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any.” Hugh Laurie
What about you?What are you taking action on today? Let us know in the comments below.
If you like listening to The Changeability Podcast help us outNominations have opened for the first ever UK Podcasters’ Awards and are open for the whole of July. If you like our podcast we would absolutely love it if you’d consider nominating us for a UK Podcast Award.
You can nominate us up to once a day for each day of July – so if you really love us you can do it everyday – but even once would be fabulous.
Simply click here and then on ‘nominate this podcast’.
You’ll be asked to verify it with an email address, Facebook or Twitter (this is to make sure it’s only 1 vote per podcast per day).
Thank you very much K and J xxx
-
“Action is the foundational key to all success.” ~ Pablo Picasso
Changeability is the ability to change. It’s the fundamental ability underpinning your approach to what you want in life and how you get it.
It’s what The Changeability Podcast is about - developing the ability to change through managing your mind. Getting you in the right mindset and way of thinking to achieve what you want to achieve.
And the Changeability book Changeability: Manage your Mind – Change your Life is basically a 10-step framework of tools and techniques to do just that.
Yes it’s crucial to focus our thoughts and use the power of our thoughts and mind to help us do what we want to do – but that’s not the end of the story.
Today we’re talking about what comes next.
Because it’s all very well doing all this prep, getting yourself in the right frame of mind and developing the positive mindset to get you where you want to be – but you still have to actually get there.
That means taking action.
The one thing that differentiates those who read this and think it's interesting from those who change something as a result is they take action.
And to take action you need to plan for action.
But not just any old action. It’s not about being busy for the sake of feeling like you’re doing something.
Effective action comes from knowing what you want to achieve, and what to change to get there. It’s the big picture stuff your goals come out of.
Reverse engineeringReverse engineering is the term for a technical process, where you start with a finished product and take it apart to see how it works, the components and interrelationships, so you can put it together again or improve it.
Reverse engineering begins with the product and works through the design process in the opposite or backwards direction.
Basically that’s what you can do with your life – start with the finished product, how you want your changed life to look, and work backwards to see the steps that need to be taken to get you there.
Action planningFirst you have your vision – what you want your life to look like.
Then what do you need to change to get that life.
But these are still big goals and dreams, but not yet actions.
They’re what you need to achieve in order to have the life you want, but don’t indicate how you do it.
To do this we need to break it down further.
The next layer is the milestone. These are interim goals that unsurprisingly work like a milestone. A stone sign that in the olden days (as children say) told you how many miles it was to your destination. You weren’t there but you were on your way and this was a defined place along the journey.
Your milestones show you’re on the right track. Interim goals that when you achieve them, build towards your big overarching goal or vision.
You might have a vision goal to be slim – but it doesn’t mean anything on its own. So your milestone goal gives you something to aim for on the way to becoming slim e.g. be 10 pounds lighter in one month’s time.
Now you have something concrete to aim for – the milestone – and the next layer is to identify the measurable actions to get from where you are now to the milestone. For instance,
- Enrol at the local gym (by a certain date).
- Attend 3 gym sessions or classes a week for the next two months.
- Choose a suitable eating plan (date).
- Remove all unhealthy options from my kitchen (date).
- Create some health eating affirmations (date).The final layer is the micro-step or trigger action.
As the name suggests, these are the first tiny steps that trigger the next action and make it easier and more likely you’ll take it.
For example, leaving your gym clothes laid out in your bedroom or your gym shoes by the door, so you don’t have to think about getting ready to go straight to the gym when you get up in the morning.When you don’t know where to startIt all seems to make logical sense – but what about when you don’t know what actions to take. You’ve got your vision, you’ve set your milestone but don’t know how to get there?
Some goals will have more obvious actions to take, like a healthy eating plan or training regime, but sometimes you wont know what to do.
The trick here is to find a way to take the first step.
Think around the subject; do a bit of research and make an educated guess about where would be a good place to start.
It doesn’t have to be perfect; it’s about finding a way in, getting started and building momentum.
“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” ~ Dr Martin Luther King Jr.
The Changeability Podcast episode 48To hear us talking more about action planning for success and other things along the way listen to episode 48 of The Changeability Podcast.
Resources and links mentionedEpisode 12 - Making goals happen with entrepreneus Chris MarrEpisode 11 - How to set goals that workEpisode 10 - The power of goalsEpisode 9 - What is your vision in life?Thank youThank you for reading and listening to the podcast. And a special thanks to the action takers who’ve been generous enough to leave The Changeability Podcast a review.
This is very important to us as it makes a big difference to the visibility of the podcast which in turn means more people listen.
So if you have a couple of minutes to help us out we would very much appreciate a review and rating on iTunes or Stitcher.
- Show more
