Episodios
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In this episode, Sylvia reflects on a life-changing lesson she learned from communications expert Vinh Giang. Inspired by his insights, Sylvia delves into how the beliefs and narratives we hold about ourselves are not fixed and can be changed. Drawing from personal experiences and neuroscience, she explores how our behaviours often stem from old beliefs and how we can consciously break free from them.
You'll learn how to identify and challenge limiting beliefs that may be holding you back and discover the power of neuroplasticity—your brain's ability to reorganise itself and create new neural connections. This episode offers practical steps for creating a new narrative, one that aligns with the life you want to live.
Key Takeaways:
How old beliefs shape your identity and behaviours. The role of neuroplasticity in changing your habits and thought patterns. Tips for breaking free from limiting beliefs and rewriting your story. The power of taking conscious action to create a new future.Show Links:
Website: www.sylviasuwan.com Book Your Free ConsultationRemember to subscribe, rate, and review if you found this episode helpful! Have a beautiful week, and I'll catch you next time.
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Hey everyone, welcome back! As we near the end of the year, it’s a great time to reflect on what’s worked – and what hasn’t. In this episode, I’m speaking directly to those of you who’ve had a tough year, especially if you’ve been struggling to move past a difficult breakup. Together, we’ll look at why it’s been so hard to get unstuck and, more importantly, how you can make next year different.
I’ll share insights on the stages of grief and how we often find ourselves holding onto emotions like denial, anger, and regret far longer than we realise. If you feel as though you’re looping in these stages, you might be reinforcing patterns that keep you from moving forward. Let’s talk about the difference between healthy processing and unhelpful rumination, and explore strategies to leave those habits behind.
This episode is all about preparing for 2025 with purpose. Instead of waiting until New Year’s Eve to set resolutions, I’ll guide you on how to gradually build a new version of yourself, starting right now. By identifying what truly motivates you and setting small, achievable goals, you’ll set yourself up for long-term success instead of quick burnout.
Questions to ask yourself:
What kind of person do you want to be a year from now? How do you want to feel about yourself and your life? What’s one step you can take today to start moving forward?If you’re ready to start letting go of the past and embracing the possibilities ahead, this episode is here to support you. Listen in, take notes, and let’s make the next year your best one yet.
Thank you for tuning in. Don’t forget to subscribe if you haven’t already, and I’d love it if you could leave a rating or review. Here’s to a beautiful week and an even better year ahead!
Show Links:
Ready To Join Breakup to Blessing? Sign up here -
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Today, we’re diving into a topic many of us face: the way we handle conflict in our relationships. Often, we wait until tensions peak before addressing issues, but I’m here to encourage a different approach—discussing these things before they escalate, while we’re in a positive, calm state. This allows us to communicate more constructively and prevents the cycle of recurring arguments and unresolved feelings.
In this episode, I explore the difference between focusing on symptoms (the surface-level problems) and tackling the roots (the deeper issues driving these conflicts). When we only address symptoms, it’s like covering a wound without cleaning it—temporary fixes won’t heal the deeper issues.
Some key points we discuss:
• Why “symptom-fixing” often fails: Without addressing the underlying emotions, resentment and frustration can build up, leading to recurring conflicts.
• Missed opportunities for growth and intimacy: By avoiding difficult conversations, we miss out on moments of vulnerability that foster deeper connection.
• Self-reflection in conflict: Often, symptom-fixing leads us to blame our partner’s actions instead of exploring our own role or the dynamics between us.
Common examples of symptom-focused behaviour include:
• Trust issues: Addressed only by setting boundaries instead of exploring underlying insecurities.
• Communication breakdown: Limiting phone use without tackling the root issue of emotional disconnection.
• Physical intimacy: Creating “reminders” for physical affection rather than exploring unspoken feelings or shifts in priorities.
To build a healthier approach, I discuss the importance of self-awareness, learning to self-regulate, and effective listening. I also talk about reframing complaints as needs, so we can better understand and communicate our deeper emotions and desires.
Take some time to reflect on your relationship. Are there issues that keep resurfacing? Could there be a deeper root you’re overlooking? Try making one small change this week—take a step back, look deeper, and open up an honest conversation
Show Links:Join Breakup to Blessing: https://sylviasuwan.com/program
Book a Free Consultation: https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation
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In this episode, we tackle the painful and often polarising topic of infidelity. Cheating can feel like a devastating breach of trust and, for many, it seems unforgivable. Drawing from personal experience and insights from relationship expert Esther Perel, I discuss why viewing infidelity in black-and-white terms can complicate our healing and growth. We examine some of the common emotions people feel after betrayal—such as self-blame, doubts about self-worth, and a shattered trust in others. These reactions can be debilitating, making it crucial to develop a mindset that doesn’t allow betrayal to dominate our happiness.
I share ways to rebuild inner security so that fear of potential betrayal doesn’t overshadow your relationships. Key steps include cultivating a strong sense of self-worth, reframing trust, and focusing on your resilience and ability to recover.By understanding the reasons people may cheat—such as seeking novelty, identity exploration, or relief from unmet emotional needs—you can view infidelity less as a reflection of your worth and more as a sign of the other person's struggles.
Ultimately, this episode is about finding peace and confidence within yourself, embracing love and connection without letting the possibility of betrayal take control.
Show Links:
Join Breakup to Blessing https://sylviasuwan.com/programInterested in working with me 1:1? Book a free consultation
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In this episode, we dive into the process of recognising and breaking unhealthy relationship patterns, specifically focusing on why we might be drawn to emotionally unavailable partners. You’ll learn how to identify your own thoughts, behaviours, and decisions that contribute to these patterns and, more importantly, what you can do to shift them.
Key Takeaways:
How to recognise if you have a relationship pattern that’s holding you back The role childhood experiences play in attracting emotionally unavailable partners How to create a “red flag list” for yourself The importance of setting clear boundaries and creating new standards for your relationships How to embrace vulnerability and express your needs in healthy ways Why building a support system and practicing patience are crucial steps in breaking these patternsFree Masterclass: Don’t miss my upcoming free masterclass on How to Move On From Heartbreak on 6th November at 7am (AEST). Register here
Join Breakup to Blessing: https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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In this episode, we dive into a topic that’s relevant to everyone at some point in their lives—how to be okay with not being okay. Whether you’re going through heartbreak, dealing with a difficult situation at work or home, or just feeling like you want the pain to disappear, this episode is for you.
I explore how many of us, growing up, weren’t taught to sit with our feelings. Instead, our parents or caregivers tried to make us feel better as quickly as possible, unknowingly teaching us to avoid discomfort. As a result, many of us never learned how to regulate our emotions, which often manifests in adulthood as an inability to handle challenging situations calmly.
Key topics in this episode include:
Why we avoid uncomfortable emotions and how it impacts us as adults The importance of learning to sit with your feelings rather than immediately comforting yourself How social media, Netflix, and other distractions prevent us from regulating our emotions Practical steps to retrain your nervous system and become more emotionally resilient Why insight alone isn’t enough—you need to apply what you’ve learned to truly change your behaviourIf you’ve struggled with feeling overwhelmed by emotions or find it hard to return to a calm state after being challenged, this episode will provide you with practical tools and guidance to start creating lasting change.
Listen in and discover how to be more present with your emotions and why it’s okay to not always have everything together.
Show Links:
Work with me https://www.sylviasuwan.com/consultation
Breakup to Blessing Program https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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In today’s episode, I dive into the process of rebuilding your life after a breakup. If you're feeling lost or unsure of how to move forward, you're not alone. Many people experience this after a relationship ends, and it can feel like you're wandering through life without direction.
Last week, we talked about shifting your mindset and taking control of your life – if you haven’t listened to that episode, I recommend checking it out first to lay a strong foundation for today's discussion.
In this episode, I walk you through the steps of making small, consistent changes to rebuild your life. Whether it’s your career, relationships, or another part of your life, these small shifts can lead to profound transformation over time. I use examples like the British cycling team’s success story, which highlights how even marginal gains can lead to incredible outcomes.
Key points covered include:
Taking small, manageable steps towards change Setting realistic expectations for your progress Assessing different areas of your life using tools like the Wheel of Life Building and nurturing your inner circle of friends to provide support during tough timesIf you’d like to dive deeper into how you can implement these strategies in your life, send me a DM on Instagram @sylviasuwan or Book a free consult
Resources Mentioned:
Simon Sinek’s book, Start With Why Atomic Habits by James ClearListen to the full episode and learn how to start rebuilding your life, one small step at a time.
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In this episode, I reflect on the biggest shift that transformed how I view my life, no matter the circumstances. From my childhood to my rebellious teen years, marriage, divorce, and the journey of self-discovery, I've come to realise that my attitude has always been the deciding factor in how I feel and respond to life.
We often let our circumstances dictate our happiness, but today, I want to talk about finding sufficiency in the here and now. I share how I moved from feeling powerless during a difficult divorce to gaining clarity, gratitude, and control by shifting my mindset. I discuss the importance of focusing on what we have instead of what we lack, and how that change in perspective can lead to better decision-making and a sense of empowerment.
This episode is for anyone feeling stuck, uncertain, or overwhelmed by life. I’ll guide you on how to move from victimhood to agency, so you can make intentional decisions and create the life you truly want. It’s about learning to appreciate what you have, while also working toward the goals that bring you joy and fulfilment.
Tune in to discover:
Why your perspective is the key to happiness How finding sufficiency in your current situation can transform your life Practical steps to start taking control of your future The power of pursuing goals to increase your sense of self-worth and diminish envyPlus, if you're in need of immersive healing after a breakup or difficult relationship, don’t miss out on my upcoming retreat. It's happening on the 10th of November, and it's designed for those looking for a supportive space to heal and grow.
Resources Mentioned:
Sign up for my retreat: bumblebeetretreats.com.au -
In this episode, Sylvia delves into the impact of breakups on our brains, highlighting the concept of "amygdala hijack" and how it influences our emotional responses. Drawing on insights from Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence, she explains the interplay between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex, and how stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline affect us during tough times.
Discover why understanding your thoughts is crucial for healing and learn practical strategies to manage anxiety. Sylvia shares techniques from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to help you become more aware of your thought patterns and introduce mindfulness practices to connect with your body.
Key topics include:
The science behind emotional responses during breakups The connection between anxiety and amygdala hijack Strategies for managing stress through conscious thought The importance of listening to your body and recognising emotions Effective breathing techniques to activate the parasympathetic nervous systemJoin Sylvia as she encourages you to take control of your mental well-being, fostering a sense of calm amidst life’s challenges.
Resources Mentioned:
Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence 4-7-8 Breathing TechniqueBook a free consult with Sylvia: https://sylviasuwan.com
Book your spot for my upcoming Breakup Retreat: https://bumblebeeretreats.com.au/retreats
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In this episode, I expand on last week's discussion about moving forward one small step at a time, and we dive into the idea of incorporating hope and possibility into your life. Moving forward after a breakup is a three-phase process: letting go of the past, accepting the present, and creating your future.
Sometimes we can get stuck in the first two phases, but choosing to let go is key to making that shift towards healing. I’ll guide you through how to open your mind to what’s possible for your future, and how to use this time to intentionally create the life you truly want. Whether it’s changing careers, travelling the world, or building a new home, this is your chance to embrace those dreams.
We also touch on the echo chambers of social media and how the content you consume can either hold you back or help you grow. I’ll share some insights on how to clear out the ‘online junk food’ and nourish your mind with positive, growth-focused content. Plus, I recommend a book that really helped me during my own transformational journey.
This week’s episode is packed with practical tips on how to make hope and possibility part of your daily routine and mindset.
Join me on 10 November for my healing retreat in Sydney. For more details, visit bumblebeeretreats.com.au/retreats
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In today’s episode, we’re diving deep into the process of moving on after a breakup, one small step at a time. Too often, people rush to let go and move on before they’re ready, leading to frustration and disappointment. I talk about how to break down the overwhelming goal of "moving on" into smaller, manageable steps that can help you heal gradually without feeling like it’s impossible.
We explore:
Why jumping straight to "moving on" can feel daunting and unattainable The brain’s response to stress and how it affects your ability to move forward The importance of grieving and allowing yourself time to process emotions How to create new routines and structures to support your healing Why small, achievable goals build confidence and progress Shifting your mindset to focus on feeling better now, without pressure to fully let goI also touch on the power of your thoughts in shaping your reality, and how journaling can help you track your mental and emotional shifts during this journey.
If you’re struggling to move on, this episode will offer practical, compassionate advice to help you take it one step at a time.
In-Person Breakup Retreat: Join me for my in-person breakup retreat in Sydney! This retreat is designed to give you the love, support, and community you need during a challenging time. Early bird rate of $397 is available for this month only, and you’ll receive a free 1-hour coaching session. After that, the rate will be $450. Spaces are limited to 12, so don’t miss out!
Show Links:
Breakup Retreat: Bumblebee Retreats Follow me on Instagram: @sylviasuwan Episode 83 How to Let Go When You Don't Want to Let Go Episode 41 The Only 2 Things You Need To Work On To Heal Your Heartbreak -
In this episode, I’m talking directly to those of you who feel responsible for the end of your relationship. Whether it was a moment of infidelity, an outburst, or ongoing anxiety that led to the breakup, this episode is here to help you navigate the guilt and find a path forward.
I’ll guide you through the importance of owning your actions, understanding your partner’s feelings, and what it takes to rebuild trust if you’re both committed to moving forward. We’ll also explore the value of introspection and how addressing your underlying behaviours can prevent future mistakes. Plus, I’ll discuss how to make amends even if your relationship is over and you’re seeking healing and closure for yourself.
If this sounds like your situation, or even if you’re someone who was wronged, this episode is for you.
Episode Highlights:
How to own up to your mistakes and give your partner the time and space to heal The role of introspection and therapy in understanding why you acted the way you did How to rebuild trust and avoid repeating the same mistakes What to do if your relationship ended and you want to make amends for your own healingI’m also excited to announce that bookings are now open for my Breakup Healing Retreat on November 3rd! It’s going to be an intimate and transformational day with only 12 participants, so each person will get personalised attention.
If you’re interested, visit www.bumblebeeretreats.com.au/retreats or send me a DM on Instagram @sylviasuwan.
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In this episode, we dive into a crucial yet often overlooked stage in relationships—the period before a breakup. While there’s plenty of advice on what to do after a breakup, today, we’re focusing on the internal process someone goes through when they start to consider whether their relationship is still right for them. We’ll explore the doubts, the inner conflicts, and the stages of deliberation that lead up to the decision to end a relationship.
We also touch on insights from Esther Perel, who reminds us that relationships involve three entities: you, your partner, and the relationship itself. It’s crucial to nurture all three, but when one is neglected, it can lead to significant issues down the line.
If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of a breakup and felt confused or blindsided, this episode will offer you a new perspective. We’ll unpack the typical stages someone might go through when contemplating a breakup, from feeling discontent to mentally weighing the pros and cons, to the fears and uncertainties they might face.
Whether you’re currently in a relationship or still processing a past breakup, this episode is full of insights that can help you understand what might have been going on for your ex or even prepare you to navigate similar situations in the future.
Tune in to gain a deeper understanding of the pre-breakup phase and learn how to create a safe environment in your relationships where honest communication can thrive.
Key Points Discussed:
The internal process of considering a breakup The role of doubt, discontentment, and emotional dissatisfaction How individuals weigh the pros and cons before making a decision The importance of aligning needs, desires, and future goals Common fears faced by those contemplating a breakup The subtle signs of emotional distancing Creating a safe space for open and honest communication in relationshipsShow Links:
Early Bird Retreat Registration DM @sylviasuwan
Join Breakup to Blessing https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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In today's episode, I’m diving deep into how you can move on from a breakup in just 12 weeks. Moving on doesn’t mean you’re fully healed, but it does mean freeing yourself from attachment to your ex and any lingering desires to be with them.
I’ll break down the three key factors that determine how quickly you can move on: belief in your ability to do so, your desire to move forward, and your willingness to step into the unknown. We’ll explore how you can shift your mindset, build a new self-concept, and take responsibility for your own life.
I’ll also outline the five steps that will guide you through this 12-week journey, including acceptance, rewiring your brain, developing self-awareness, and creating a life aligned with your true purpose. If this resonates with you, I encourage you to join my Breakup to Blessing program, where I coach you through these steps in detail.
Thanks for listening! Don’t forget to tune in next week for more insights and guidance.
Show links:
Join Breakup to Blessing and move on in 12 weeks https://sylviasuwan.com/program
Episode 79 – Healing vs Moving On
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In this episode of the Breakup to Blessing podcast, I delve into the complex feelings surrounding breakups that leave us searching for answers, especially when they just don't seem to make sense. As a breakup and relationship coach, I'm passionate about helping individuals navigate their emotional landscapes and find clarity during turbulent times. This particular discussion centers on the common misconception that we find closure solely through understanding our ex’s actions, and how often what we really need is to accept that their reasoning may forever remain a mystery to us.
I begin by addressing the concept of closure, a term often thrown around in the aftermath of a breakup. It's easy to believe that closure is something we are owed by our former partners, but the truth is that many people already possess enough information to grant themselves a degree of closure; it’s simply a matter of accepting it. For those who grapple with confusion regarding the breakup, I challenge the belief that their ex's feelings and actions should align perfectly. The reality is that emotional complexities can cloud judgment and lead to decisions that might seem illogical from the outside.
Throughout this conversation, I emphasise the importance of recognizing emotional variability. It's crucial to accept that people are not only influenced by their feelings but also by a multitude of external factors. I discuss how some individuals, particularly women, often find themselves replaying past conversations, seeking meaning in each word spoken, yet failing to reach a resolution. This mental spiral can prevent growth and healing if we become too entrenched in our need for answers that may never come.
I highlight how differing emotional processing skills can lead to misinterpretation of a partner's feelings. Many people, especially in romantic contexts, operate with distinct emotional frameworks. It’s common for someone to express love and commitment one moment and then act in direct opposition when caught in inner turmoil. This dissonance can be particularly confusing and painful. I draw parallels with childhood experiences to illustrate how quickly feelings can shift, reflecting on the dualities we struggled to comprehend as children and how that same complexity exists in adult relationships.
The episode further explores the intersection of logic and emotion in decision-making, underscoring the divergent ways we each approach relationships. Some individuals prioritise rational thinking, while others lean heavily on their emotional instincts. This dissimilarity can lead to misunderstandings about the depth and permanence of feelings, particularly in a breakup scenario. I introduce the idea that although we may feel uniquely connected to our ex-partners, each person's internal experience is vastly different, shaped by their own beliefs, backgrounds, and emotional literacy.
Toward the close of our discussion, I address the call to find acceptance in situations where clarity eludes us. I propose shifting perspectives: rather than focusing on our partner's decisions that we may not understand, we should redirect that energy towards our own growth and healing. Releasing the need for definitive answers is a vital step in moving forward. Understanding that our self-worth is not tied to another's choices can be liberating and, ultimately, empowering.
This episode serves as a gentle reminder that it’s okay to not have all the answers right away. Instead, I encourage listeners to embrace the ambiguity of life and trust that clarity will come in its own time. The essence of healing lies not in dissecting our past relationships but in focusing on ourselves and our journeys ahead.Show Links:
Join Breakup to Blessing and Transform Your Life https://sylviasuwan.com
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Today we delve into the challenging process of letting go, especially when it feels impossible to do so. Many of us struggle with this, even when we know it's the right thing to do. This episode will guide you through understanding why letting go is difficult and provide actionable steps to help you move forward.
In This Episode, We Discuss:
Why Letting Go is Difficult: Understanding the emotional attachment and why it's hard to accept the end of a relationship. The Importance of No-Contact: Treating no-contact like overcoming an addiction to help you move on.Steps to Let Go:
Self-Reflection: Engage in introspection to understand your attachment through journaling, therapy, or talking to a trusted friend. Identify what emotional needs your ex fulfilled. Acceptance: Recognise that the relationship no longer serves you positively and that staying attached only brings negative outcomes. Emotional Regulation: Learn techniques such as deep breathing, journaling, and mindfulness to manage and regulate your emotions. These skills are crucial for future healthy relationships. Reframing Thoughts: Challenge and reframe obsessive thoughts about your ex. Create a new narrative that supports your goal of detachment. Building Self-Worth: Recognise your strengths, achievements, and qualities. Validate yourself rather than seeking approval from others. Cultivating Independence: Engage in activities that boost your confidence and sense of autonomy. Try new things, learn new skills, and focus on personal growth. Focusing on the Present: Practice daily mindfulness and meditation to stay in the moment and avoid dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.Key Takeaways:
Letting go requires emotional work, not just intellectual understanding. Self-reflection and acceptance are crucial first steps. Developing emotional regulation and self-worth can help you build healthier future relationships. Cultivating independence and staying present are key to moving forward.Show Links:
Join Breakup to Blessing and Transform Your Heartbreak https://sylviasuwan.com/program
Free Breakup Journal Link: Download Here
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Welcome back to episode 82. Today's episode is for anyone who feels anxious in their relationships or while dating, and also for those who are dating someone with anxious attachment.
In this episode, we discuss:
Defining Anxiety in Relationships: Understanding what it means to feel anxious and how it impacts your emotional and physical state. Behavioural Side Effects: The constant need for reassurance, avoidance of important conversations, and the oscillation between clinginess and withdrawal. Physical Side Effects: How anxiety can lead to sleep disturbances and affect your overall wellbeing. Communication Challenges: The difficulties anxiety introduces in maintaining open and honest communication.We also explore strategies to manage and reduce anxiety:
Audit Your Relationships: Assess how secure you feel in your current relationships and identify areas for improvement. Positive Affirmations: Create lists of qualities that your friends, partner, and you love about yourself to combat anxiety and boost self-esteem. Deep Breathing and Reflection: Use deep breathing techniques and read your affirmations before reacting anxiously. Seek Professional Help: If anxiety is deeply impacting your life, consider therapy to gain tools and techniques for better management.Remember, it's not just about finding the right partner but also about working on yourself to build healthier, more secure relationships.
Show links:
Join Breakup to Blessing: https://sylviasuwan.com/program
Episode 37: What attachment style are you?
Episode 38: How to become securely attached
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Welcome to episode 81! In today's podcast I show you 8 positive signs you have moved on from your ex and how you can use these to guide your journey as a way to measure your progress.
In this episode, we cover:
Neutral or Indifferent Feelings: You feel neutral or indifferent about your ex.
No Future Fantasies or Past Romances: You don’t fantasise about them in your future or think about them romantically in the past.
Sense of Closure: You feel a sense of closure about the relationship, even without direct closure from them.
Minimal Thoughts: You rarely think about them, if at all.
No Jealousy: You don’t feel jealous about them being with someone else.
Openness to Dating: You’re open to dating others and don’t compare them to your ex.
Minimal Social Media Checks: You don’t check their social media frequently.
No Desire to Reunite: You wouldn’t want to get back together with them, even if given the chance.Show links:
Join Breakup to Blessing https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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Welcome to episode 80. Since starting this podcast in November last year, I’ve been releasing episodes twice a week. My Monday episodes focus on practical tips and strategies, while Friday episodes offer inspiration for the weekend. Moving forward, I’ll concentrate more on the Monday episodes, providing more depth, and this will be the final Friday bitesized episode for now. Future interviews might bring back the twice-weekly schedule.
Today's episode is essential for anyone trying to move on or heal from heartbreak. Whether your relationship ended recently or it's been months or even years, if you still struggle to move on, this episode is for you.
We delve into the importance of "setting intentions for healing." Without a clear intention, our emotions can lead us astray, especially during heartbreak. These emotions can push us to actions that hinder our healing, like contacting an ex when feeling lonely or upset. Setting a strong intention can help you resist these impulses by making you reflect on the consequences.
I offer an exercise to help set your intention for healing. Grab a pen and paper and list everything that was unhealthy about the relationship. Next, list what you want in a future relationship, referencing what you loved in past ones. Finally, list all the reasons you must heal to be ready for a future relationship. This exercise will give you a tangible reminder of why your future self deserves you to show up and heal.
If you enjoyed this episode, feel free to listen again. Thanks for tuning in, and I’ll catch you next week!
Show Links
Join Breakup to Blessing https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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In this episode of Breakup to Blessing, we explore the crucial differences between healing and moving on after a relationship ends. Understanding these distinctions is key to achieving emotional freedom and forming healthier future relationships.
Show Notes:
The Difference Between Healing and Moving On:
Moving on means being free from your ex in terms of attachment and desire. This involves not having any romantic feelings towards them and not letting emotions like resentment, anger, or jealousy prevent you from committing to another relationship.Healing:
Healing is a more complex process that varies depending on what needs healing. It can take years, especially if the relationship involved abuse, trauma, or long-term emotional pain. Therapy might be necessary to aid in this process. Sometimes, you may not even realise there are unresolved issues until you are in a new relationship and get triggered. These moments reveal what still needs attention.Testing Your Healing:
The true extent of your healing often becomes apparent when you commit to another person. Real-life situations can test your emotional responses, revealing any lingering trauma. For example, if your ex's unresponsiveness caused you anxiety, this might resurface in a new relationship if not fully addressed.Complex Sources of Trauma:
It's important to recognise that unresolved trauma may not only stem from your relationship with your ex. It can be a product of various past relationships, including those with family members, which affect your romantic relationships.Moving On vs. Complete Healing:
Ideally, you should start by moving on from your ex before aiming for complete healing. Waiting to be fully healed before entering a new relationship might mean you never get into one. You can heal while in a relationship, but remember, it's not your partner's job to fix you. The responsibility is yours, though having a supportive partner is crucial.Supporting Each Other:
A partner's role is also significant. Even if they weren't part of your past, they have a role in supporting you if they want to build a future with you. A committed relationship involves embracing both the good and the difficult parts.The Reality of Past Experiences:
Everyone has a past, and the older you get, the more likely it is that you and others will have things to work on. There's no such thing as being fully healed and completely free from the past when entering a new relationship.Key Takeaway:
The minimum you should aim for is to move on from your ex—the person. From there, you can work on healing other aspects.Show Links:
Join Breakup to Blessing and move on in 12 weeks: https://sylviasuwan.com/program
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