Episodios

  • Low Anxiety, Going Places



    In this episode, I give a shoutout to Kevin for Montana info, share insights from Andrew Pulrang's Disability Thinking, and discuss prepping Dax Pierson interview questions. I also talk about my kids' haircuts, our neighborhood, music, therapy, hospital visits, and my recent solo trips and poetry publications.



    Shout Outs







    Shout outs to Kevin. thanks for the info about Montana. Kevin does comic book reviews on his YouTube channel Under The Cowl Of MS.



    Disability Thinking







    Now reading Andrew Pulrang's Disability Thinking Substack. I've always been partial to the combination of disability with thinking, the guy's been on another level for a long time.



    Writing Dax Pierson interview questions. I have been lagging, trying to be recovered fully before doing the interview. I think it may be time to move forward.



    I'll Gladly Pay Tomorrow For A Haircut Today



    After months of hair drama, i took my kids to Supercuts and John's long hair was over in a moment. He was happy. With his new haircut, he's ready for summer.



    I'm glad that our neighborhood is a protected cul-de-sac. It means the kids can play outside with the other kids in the neighborhood and there's hardly any car traffic.



    New Music: Magic Fig, "Magic Fig"







    Magic Fig. San Francisco psych band. I heard it reviewed at the KFJC staff meeting and I ordered it from the group's bandcamp page.




    Cool new record – local band – insane amount of styles – dreamlike hooks – psychedelic SF – full sonic fireworks, Silver Current Label – over the top – combo Sid Barrett mixed with HR Puff n’ Stuff
    KFJC Music Notes 6/5/24



    24-Hour yogurt is smoother than 8-hour yogurt, go figure.



    I went to the Express Care at the Eden Valley Medical Center bc my ear was feeling blocked, like it had somebody's thumb stuck in it. They prescribed Flonase and something else, and they've been making it easier to breathe through the machine



    My anxiety is low, put fast away, like it's in the past. My talk therapist thinks it may be due to the EMDR therapy that we've been doing.



    Excursions



    I drove the kids to Foothill College where we went to KFJC and we hung out with Jack Tar and Good Karma before having snack on the quad, and then we drove to Hayward. In Hayward, we went to Burger King, a place the kids wanted to go badly after seeing the commercial a million times.



    Territorial Expansion







    The next day, I went to Oakland on my own. I've learned how to strap the wheelchair onto my car by myself. On Father's Day, I took the kids to Berkeley. We went to Amoeba Music, Moe's Books, Games of Berkeley, and had slices of pizza for lunch. My new expanded base of operations includes Oakland, Berkeley and Los Altos.



    Acceptances







    My ears were burning, my vibe was strong. Three poems were accepted for publication in two different journals. After a long gap, they were accepted in the same day by editors working half a world apart. It'll be my first time publishing my work in another country, and also my first time reprinting a poem. Stay tuned, you'll be the first to know..

  • In the latest "What's the Matter with Me?" podcast, John updates on his improved sleep with a sleep apnea device, newfound independence loading his wheelchair, upcoming Montana trip, and reflections on anxiety. He also mentions his kids' interest in the viral "Skibidi Toilet" videos.



    A Toilet For The Ages




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrlkXOxlvCk




    I asked my son about skibidi toilet, and he replied:




    It's gone viral.. in fifty years, look in the history books, and there'll be skibidi toilet. Skibidi Toilet is a part of history.
    A 10-year-old



    Shoutouts




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6QOrgMeuMI




    Shout outs to Amy and Matt who had us over for a barbecueShout outs to Anthony was in town and came over



    It Sucks To Breathe Through A Straw



    My sleep apnea CPAP device has been having low pressure, making it hard to breathe through. Unsurprisingly, it triggers anxiety. It's like breathing through a long straw. To counteract the feeling of not being able to breathe, I adjusted the pressure on my sleep apnea device and slept longer.



    I'm trying to get an appointment with the sleep doctor. I've slept ok last the last four or five nights.



    Sisyphean Labor For Meager Reward



    Community radio DJ holding a torch aloft by the side of the inky black ocean



    Submitting poetry is comforting because the process is its own reward. It can just go on endlessly, a bit like the radio.



    Talking to my friends, many have some source of anxiety, from stress, responsibility, waking up in the middle of the night, no afternoon coffee, drinking beer and sleeping badly. I guess what I'm going through is a fairly common experience.



    I used Curb Free With Cory Lee! as a guide to book a wheelchair-accessible Alaska Cruise for 2025. This summer, we're going to Montana for family vacation.



    The new coffee machine is making better espresso. I haven't fully figured out how to steam milk and integrate that into my coffee making, so I end up with a cappuccino that is exactly the way I want it.



    I'm taking the kids to school in the mornings again.



    Uncontrolled anxious thought chains kept me from bed. I didn't get to sleep until after 1:00 a.m.



    Did It By Myself



    Today I did something I have been afraid of for months- since we got the wheelchair lift- I l loaded and unloaded my chair onto my van by myself.In November, when I got the chair lift, I assumed that I couldn't do it because there were straps and restraints to tie down the chair. A little complicated for me last year, but now, I've figured out some ways that I can use it on my own and there's no other way to figure that out but just doing it



    Thanks to my wife who supported me and who loaded my chair in and out of my van for years and now I figured out how I can do it on my own. I've needed a victory like this that I could point to and say, "I am improving."



    It takes a couple minutes to put my wheelchair on the car, but not very long at all. It makes me feel independent and that is very good.



    In related news, I drove and got my pants hemmed at John The Fashion Tailor in Oakland. I've been getting things altered there for 20 years. Hemming six inches off of my pants changed the proportion of my clothes.



    Skibidi Toilet is a part of historyI slept pretty well last night



    Skibidi Toilet Selfie














    00:00:01 - Intro



    00:01:57 - Last episode recap



    00:03:54 - CPAP machine malfunction



    00:06:09 - Submitting poetry



    00:06:27 - Community radio DJ



    00:07:23 - Many people have anxiety



    00:08:27 - Wheelchair accessible vacation planning



    00:10:19 - Curb Free With Cory Lee



    00:11:52 - Missoula, Montana vacation



    00:13:28 - New coffee machine



    00:14:38 - Taking my kids to school



    00:15:01 - Uncontrolled anxious thought chains



    00:15:40 - Wheelchair lift breakthrough



    00:18:14 - John the Fashion Tailor



    00:19:58 - Skibidi Toilet is a part of history

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  • Compulsive behavior sequences are keeping me up at night, precluding a good night's sleep



    I'm driven from bed, get dressed, go outside to calm down, and eventually get back in bed. Out-of-control thoughts about the various trauma I'm going through overwhelm me, and soon I'm driven from bed again.



    Searched up 'strategy to stop repetitive behavior compulsive' at 130am:




    Sleep anxiety is a feeling of stress or fear about going to sleep. Anxiety is the most common mental health disorder in the U.S. Research suggests that most people with mental health disorders like anxiety also have some form of sleep disruption. Treatments may include therapy, better sleep hygiene or medication.
    "Sleep Anxiety," Cleveland Clinic



    Drop-off is the new normal



    I took the kids to school again. We listened to KCSM, the Bay Area's Jazz Station, on the short drove to school. my daughter said it reminded her of Grandma's house, where indeed there is always jazz on the stereo. I told her about how I grew up listening to jazz on the radio.



    Good Things Are Happening



    My walking is definitely improving. Soon, I hope I can go to KFJC on my own. I'm working up to it. First, I got to get a good night's sleep.



    I'm falling in love with the new cat.



    Subscription Package







    We subscribed to The 2025 season of @calperformances. We're going to see @therealmambazo @SamaraJoy99 @AntonioDrumsX @ZakirHtabla. I'm very excited.



    3D Opera Glasses







    Back in the day I saw Phillip Glass perform "Monsters Of Grace," directed by Robert Wilson in Zellerbach Hall, and it was very spectacular.




    Originally, Wilson intended the fantastical scenarios he envisioned to actually be staged. When he realized the enormous costs and effort that would be involved in performing such a project (which included such tableaux as a gigantic hand pulling a sword from the ocean and a helicopter flying over the Great Wall of China), Wilson and producer Jed Wheeler began looking into creating the entire visual end of the production with 3D computer graphics. ...



    One major drawback that seems to have been the project's main flaw was the length of time required for creating and rendering the animation. It took twenty animators almost a full year to complete the footage based on Wilson's original intent. Wilson, who has been described as liking to maintain great control over his projects and to change details at the last minute, gradually grew frustrated upon seeing how much time was required to change the animations, and ended up distancing himself from the animators. This led to a final product that, from his standpoint, was unpolished. In an interview with the New York Times, he remarked, "This is like being a dog with a litter of puppies that went away six weeks later. . . . Here I was working with people who didn't know my work, in a medium I didn't know."
    "Monsters Of Grace" Wikipedia page



    We won't be seeing that again.



    We subscribed right after they announced the schedule, which reserves us a place in line to get ADA seats.



    Back on the exercise bike



    New Coffee Rig







    A new espresso machine is coming - the Lelit Victoria. It's an updated version of the 30-year old machine I use currently.



    Back And Forth



    The new therapist is doing eye movement therapy, called EMDR.




    Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, commonly known as EMDR, is a mental health therapy method. EMDR treats mental health conditions that happen because of memories from traumatic events in your past. It’s best known for its role in treating post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but its use is expanding to include treatment of many other conditions.
    "EMDR," Cleveland Clinic



    Winning



    3:33



    I'm winning the war on anxiety, because I won't have it any other way. Sleep anxiety is making things difficult.



    I drove to Emeryville and get my haircut from Anjela at New Florence Salon.



    A few days ago,

  • Getting through anxiety one day at a time, one step at a time, putting myself out there. Slogging through.



    In the news







    Paris Promised the Olympics Would Be Accessible. The Clock Is Ticking.



    Article: Paris Promised The Olympics Would Be Accessible



    The city, which put inclusivity at the center of its bid, has improved access for people with disabilities, but with the opening ceremony about 12 weeks away, obstacles remain.



    Slogging through







    Processing what's happening



    One of the hardest things about Multiple sclerosis is wrapping your head around it. being cool with the things that are happening to you in the processes that you are part of accepting them is very difficult. maybe it doesn't have to be. in Buddhism they say that all life is suffering, but some of it is unnecessary.



    Maybe it's important to accept myself and what's happening, that it is okay that you are okay it has been okay it is okay and it will continue to be okay.



    I am thinking about that because I am going to start talk therapy again



    I'm getting some relief from anxiety. taking it easy



    Last night I made rice and beans and we had it with eggs and salad



    Bailey, a female wrestler on smackdown from San Jose CA



    It rained on free comic book day



    anxious feelings are difficult to control



    back pain creating a nerve tingle in my groin and knee



    difficulty sleeping



    I play an impartial judge in mayhem special. Jersey girl and max levels



    I drove to the coffee shop and didn't give up until I got a cappuccino - twice



    drove to Oakland and pumped my own gas



    Mayhem







    Max level picked me up at my house and drove me to kfjc where we broadcast the snap crackle pop special with Jersey Girl. shout outs to max level Jersey Girl circumference, Robert Emmett and the sandman



    everybody played a role



    radio helped anxiety - in the moment



    New Therapist



    New talk therapist began. we spoke about the bad anxiety i was feeling, the anxious thoughts and the need to tell the doctor that the medication was not relieving me. my therapist has worked with disabled people before, and some of them could not communicate, so they had a hard time advocating for themselves.



    insomnia. anxiety. panic when I liey down. the numbness inside my head becomes my focus, and I obsess over it. eventually I calm myself enough to lie down, then the cycle begins anew



    I drove my family to a baby shower in Dublin for one of my wife's coworkers



    Selfie














    00:00:00 - intro



    00:00:47 - paris promised the Olympics would be accessible



    00:03:59 - slogging through anxiety



    00:07:41 - it is ok, it has been ok, it will be ok



    00:09:06 - relief



    00:09:54 - cracking crabs at market hall



    00:12:53 - wrapping your head around MS



    00:14:12 - new talk therapist



    00:15:24 - back down the track



    00:15:48 - boys time



    00:16:13 - cooking to find noormalcy



    00:17:06 - Bayley, wrestler from san jose



    00:17:48 - rainy free comic book day



    00:18:08 - anxiety thoughts



    00:19:42 - snap crackle pop kfjc mmayhem special



    00:20:49 - getting around on my own



    00:21:48 - taking the kids to school



    00:22:58 - shout outs



    00:23:28 - broadcasting in the moment



    00:24:21 - advocating at the doctor\'s office



    00:25:20 - changes in sensation



    00:26:11 - baby shower



    00:27:55 - cirque du soleil



    00:29:28 - outro

  • In "Anxiety Medication Strategy Session," changing opinions on music, bouts of anxiety, recent publication in Identity Theory and Disturb the Universe, family life changes, increased mobility, and resumption of some duties.



    Last Old Guy Or First New Guy?



    Recently, I read a tweet by flea, and I was forced to reconsider:




    https://twitter.com/flea333/status/1774601328502898936





    https://youtu.be/QEgalcH_-b4?si=q7ZD6rdC4ZhfnwbY&t=1762
    Pat Matheny on German jazz critics



    Pat Matheny was a jazz guitarist that my stepfather really admired. For that reason, in my youth I stayed away from it. In general, I mind it less now that I am older, but I generally don't seek it out.



    Sometimes, a random tweet by flea will turn decades of tradition on its head, and I'll be forced to reconsider. In an interview with Rick Beato, Pat Metheny had this to say about musical invention:




    German jazz critics are great. They'll come right out and say the most direct thing. I had a guy say to me-- you know, not that long ago, maybe 10 years ago-- "Are you the last old guy, or are you the first new guy?" and the thing is, I bet you know what he means too, right? Yeah, of course.. I mean, for me, both.



    Well, I don't know, I mean, you know, it's hard to be objective about your own thing, but what I will say is that, for me, there was no option other than trying to invent stuff, yeah.




    Anxious feelings







    I had a bout of anxious feelings and panic. I reached out to my care team and spoke over video and in-person at the office with my doctor the next day. We think it could be related to switching off of nerve-pain medication post-surgery.



    Marinated Spicy Chicken Thighs Recipe







    Over at Hoppin Hot Sauce, there's a new recipe for Marinated Spicy Chicken Thighs marinated in yogurt, salt, and Hoppin Hot Sauce.



    "Vern" published in Identity Theory




    I’m happy to announce the publication of “Vern” in Identity Theory, selected by Micro Editor Vic Nogay. Many thanks to the publisher Matt Borondy.



    “Vern” is a 50-word story about the workplace injury sustained by my great grandfather, T. Vernon Smithson, at the cotton gin in Mount Juliet, Tennessee.



    Identity Theory is an online magazine of literature and culture publishing interviews, prose, poetry, art, commentary, and other inventive explorations of humanity since 2000.
    "Vern" published




    https://twitter.com/IdentityTheory/status/1783167798942023891
    Reading "Vern" for Identity Theory



    "Hot Day" published in Disturb The Universe




    I’m happy to announce the publication of my eco-disaster poem, “Hot Day” in Disturb The Universe Magazine, April 23, 2024. The poem takes place in a decomposing world in thrall to “inevitable circumstances/ That can’t be avoided.”



    According to their website, “Disturb the Universe aims to share writing on the edge from writers strongly inhabiting their voice.” Many thanks to Editor in Chief Skaja Evens.
    "Hot Day" published



    Non-stop publication action



    Is disguising the inevitable sinking feeling but it has to be in there, somewhere.



    Domestic Emptiness



    For the first time since 2020, my wife is back to the office four days a week. It's probably a big change for her. She comes home bursting with stories of her new gig. She seems very stimulated, and I think that's a good thing. Our home is empty during the day for the first time since we moved from San Jose.



    More walking



    I'm in my wheelchair less and less, and walking more. This week I went to the library on my own, walking in and out from the parking lot, trying to build stamina. I went to the doctor without the chair. I use it when we go to the market, any time when I'll have to do extended walking or to carry things.



    Resuming Some Duties



    Last week, I picked up the kids from school and picked up the vegetable box - something that I haven't done more than once or twice in the past year.



    I made an appointment to get a hair cut in a couple weeks,

  • Featuring updates on Hoppin Hot Sauce inventory, newly published writing, recuperation from surgery, the year's first barbecue, and a new family pet.



    Sandman Knows Kale



    Shout outs to the Sandman, who wrote in about kale and he knows more about kale than I ever will. He works with kale as a kaleologist.



    Extra Hot Shortage



    Buy Extra Hot Hoppin Hot Sauce from Amazon as we will be out of stock on Extra Hot in the near term, and once Amazon runs out, we're out.



    Publication







    Instant Noodles published my 50-word story "CYBERTRUCK DENTAL, S. DE R.L."



    The link to the stuff that is published, along with what's upcoming is on the Publications page of my author site jwh.whatsthematterwithme.org



    The sinking feeling you have after publication is the same one you have after you have an art opening. Everything returns to normal. Banal, mundane, normal.



    But in fact, I did accomplish something. What I set out to do: become a published writer.



    The thing rolls on, even: a second 50-word story will be published in a different publication next week. I recorded myself reading it in a video at the request of the editor.



    Surgery Update



    Looking at the calendar, it's been about 4 weeks since I had surgery. I've reduced my medication down to the pointt where I'm almost completely titrated off of the pain medications I've been taking for months.



    New New Cat



    We've got a new cat at the house. It's a two-month-old kitten that's part-lynx. It's in quarantine for the next 10 days, maybe more.



    Barbecue







    I lit the barbecue for the first time this year. Now that my meds are reduced, I feel like not as scary to grill. For the first go-around, I made skirt steak and eggplantLast night, I grilled a pork tenderloin with whole grain mustard, brown sugar and Shaoxing wine. We ate it with steamed new potatoes and boiled carrots.



    Hollywood



    We ordered a new juniper tree, a 'Hollywood Juniper' juniperus chinensis var. kaizuka.



    Remodeling



    After launching my writer's website, I'm remaking the whatsthematterwithme.org website with the same theme. If it all goes well, I could see myself redoing HoppinHotSauce.com the same way.



    Gary in the press



    Installation view of Gary Cannone’s Manet/Degas at Compound Yellow, Oak Park, Illinois (photo Jonas Müller-Ahlheim)



    Past WTMWM? interview subject Gary Cannone got a great write-up by Lori Waxman in hyperallergic about his solo show at Compound Yellow in Oak Park, IL. Check out the Gary Cannone Interview Special here.



    Gaining equilibrium



    For the first time in months, I got up from the couch by myself. A couple of times



    Selfie



    Publication Barbecue selfie






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:01:03 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle



    00:01:20 - Shout outs



    00:02:01 - Instant Noodles Publishes \"CYBERTRUCK DENTAL, S. DE R.L.\"



    00:02:34 - The feeling you have after publication is the same one you have after you have an art opening



    00:03:17 - another story will publish next week



    00:03:35 - Writing site at jwh.whatsthematterwithme.org



    00:04:03 - RF Rhizotomy recovery update



    00:06:05 - Tapering off habit-forming medications



    00:07:08 - We have a new cat



    00:09:03 - First barbecue this year



    00:10:15 - The Way I Grill Charred Eggplant



    00:12:42 - New Juniper Tree



    00:13:43 - Remaking whatsthematterwithme.org



    00:13:55 - gary cannone hyperallergic writeup by lri waxman



    00:14:35 - getting up by myself



    00:16:11 - Outro

  • Period of Change



    Undergoing a period of change: I had surgery, I got published and I went on vacation. Plenty of new music reviews in this episode.



    A word



    What's The Matter With Me? Podcast is sponsored by Hoppin Hot Sauce. Order it on Amazon.



    JWH Live!



    Writings By John Winfield Hoppin is live, because my editor said I needed a writer's website. I think it's pretty nifty..



    Selfie Edict







    Subscribers get the selfie for as long as we all live. It's a lifetime subscription



    Shout outs




    https://twitter.com/MarchandsPetRat/status/1779926937177358503




    Shout outs to Marchandspetrat, hockey s-poster living with MS



    Shout outs to Rocky, Cousin Eric



    Gotta write up questions



    Nerve Bumps (A Queer Divine Dissatisfaction) by Dax Pierson



    Upcoming interview subject Dax Pierson



    Shout outs to the Sandman who turned me on to James Wavey Snowy Beach, which was added recently at KFJC.



    Psychedelic hip-hop from San Francisco



    James Wavey Snowy Beach by James Wavey



    Publication Dream Comes True



    I was accepted on a piece of writing, and for the first time I made a signed agreement. Follow JWH Live! to hear more about the writing.



    In the days before surgery



    In the run-up to surgery, in a lot of trigeminal neuralgia pain, I increased my dosage and I felt like it was too much. Trying to even things out, I reduced by 25% overall, and it helped return me to the land of the living.



    No coffee, no ibuprofen.



    On a day when I would usually be recording, I went to the hospital to have surgery, my third RF Rhizotomy and fifth neurosurgery on my trigeminal nerve overall. I had two MVD (microvascular decompression) surgeries to begin with. Recovery is much easier with rhizotomy. MVD literally bores a hole in your skull, and it takes a lot of recuperation to heal. Hospital stay from rhizotomy can be as short as a few hours.



    New tunes



    In advance of surgery, maybe to take my mind off it, or to give myself something to look forward to, I bought some tunes.



    Opera Glossolalia



    Spontaneous Musical Invention by Thomas Buckner sings Robert Ashley



    Robert Ashley is a composer of 1980s opera. There's a lot of talking in the libretto. The gatefold record comes with a cool book with photos. I really like the Recital label because they have interesting packaging. The record is one of 350.



    Instructions?



    Whiplash by Asha Sheshadri



    This record is like sound art, but at the same time it's a record. I'Layered, specific, related to site. Like getting a bunch of jumbled-up instructions for a treasure hunt, cryptic. Edition of 200.



    Chewing Gqom



    The Gqom Trilogy by DJ Scriby // DJ Marillo // DJ Skothan //




    Gqom is known for its beats which have a minimal, raw and repetitive sound with heavy bass. It is mainly described as having a dark and hypnotic club sound. The style of beats does not use the four-on-the-floor rhythm pattern which is often heard in other house music.
    "Gqom" Wikipedia article



    Digging this record - I'm new to Gqom, but I like it. The release is by three different DJs, a triple EP.







    Drunk in Love by Elvin Brandhi & Lord Spikeheart



    This is far out. File under extreme vocal performances. The feeling is metal, but the sound is electronic. Tense, spastic. Questionable in a good way, challenging material.



    Numb







    Now I'm back from surgery and my face feels different. Talking and eating and I'm sure other things that I'm not noticing are affected. Familiar disassociation after surgery.



    It's a matter of deciding how I feel about the things that are different. First, I have to accept them.



    Updating the map



    After surgery, it takes time for my body to properly calculate changes in sensation, and adjust the body's size map accordingly.



    In tune



    The piano is tuned



    Out on my own



    Drove to Oakland by myself and went to a couple of friend's houses for about 3 and 1/2 hours. It was the first time in 16 months.



































  • In "Drugged Out," a short episode featuring wine delivery, toilet paper shortage and trigeminal neuralgia pain medication.



    Long Time







    Subscribers get the selfie for as long as we all shall live. It's a lifetime subscription



    Green fluid



    Cuts in my hands have been getting infected and filling with green goop



    In Our Cups



    We got the wine delivery, man, and the wine deliveryman was in his 20s, maybe his mid-20s, and he was really upset about global warming. "Things aren't l really pleasant anymore," he said.



    I felt for him. "I feel for you," I said



    Toilet Paper Shortage



    We still have a case of Bulgarian toilet paper that has no perforations and ripping it feels like tearing up someone's college application, or well-qualified resume printed out on nice paper.



    Remember back in 2020, when there wasn't toilet paper? We bought a case of Bulgarian toilet paper and it was like riving a sheet of Bristol board to rip a sheet off. There were no perforations, it was 80% normal size so it didn't fit on the roll,



    Thing I Know



    I watched the "Taylor Swift: Eras" movie with Koko, so I know about Taylor Swift now. Not sure what, but I know it. The movie is long, but not as long as "Killers of the Flower Moon." She gets into slang patterns thata made me uncomfortable. To get it going, I had to figure out my Disney Plus login credentials, and that, in itself, is a big bonus.



    Electric Wire Buried In Flesh



    I'm drugged out!



    I experienced severe face pain once before bedtime, and then many times (a couple dozen?) after 4am. I cut out coffee, ibuprofen and started going up on my medicine that day, settling on twice of my usual dosage. That was too much, and I became extremely drowsy and experienced visual, balance and energy side affects. Eventually I settled around 175% of my usual dose, which. for the moment, is keeping the pain away and limiting the worst side effects.



    Surgery is next week, my third RF rhizotomy. I knew this treatment could recur and that it was not necessarily permanent. Let's hope the third time's the charm.










    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:00:22 - Shout outs



    00:01:08 - Jingle



    00:02:00 - "Taylor Swift: Eras" movie review



    00:02:13 - Bulgarian toilet paper



    00:04:42 - Trigeminal neuralgia returns



    00:07:45 - Outro



    00:08:44 - Wine delivery

  • In "Spring Concert," an incidental return to Dry Marchuary, a chapbook's worth of poetry and the school's Spring Concert.



    From chaos comes order







    One way to enjoy Hoppin Hot Sauce is "On Pasta".




    In the midst of near-total chaos, small rituals ground us, nourishing both body and soul.
    "On Pasta" at HoppinHotSauce.com



    Shout outs



    Shout outs to schwabino kickin fatal aikido kung fu karate they bout to find your body you better ask somebody mymedia designer.com tell a friend to tell a friend about my media designer



    See for yourself



    Spring Concert Selfie



    My hair is long as it's been since 2009! See for yourself above. Subscribers get the selfie e-mailed to them, they don't even have to do anything, just lay there.







    It's an NFT, it's collectible, it's a blockchain. Blockchain sounds like a necklace to me



    Lost Weekend Here I Come







    The wine delivery is coming tomorrow. In the meantime, we've been back to "One Or Two Beers Dry January-February-Marchuary" mode, just for the past few days. Long live one or two beers Dry January



    To go in your chaps



    Hippie chapbooks




    A chapbook is a small publication of up to about 40 pages, sometimes bound with a saddle stitch.
    "Chapbook," Wikipedia



    I collected what poetry I have written since I moved here in 2021. It's over 45 pages, and Wikipedia says it's enough to make a chapbook.



    Let my children play music



    Once upon a time in the auditorium



    I went to the San Leandro Unified School District Spring Concert in my wheelchair, to see my son play trumpet in the spring concert.























    Once upon a time in the auditorium







    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:02:47 - From chaos comes order



    00:03:21 - Shout outs



    00:04:10 - Long Hair



    00:05:23 - Wine delivery



    00:05:58 - Poetry Collection



    00:06:57 - Chapbook



    00:09:04 - Writing in Google Keep



    00:09:43 - Spring Concert



    00:14:27 - Attending The Concert

  • In “I Drove,” getting reacquainted with driving, where did kale come from and borscht out the wazoo.



    Iconic trio











    At Breakfast is a great time to have Hoppin Hot Sauce.




    Just like the iconic trios of Larry, Curly, and Moe, or black, white, and grey, or even the Roman numerals I, II and III, eggs, English muffins and Hoppin Hot Sauce form an unforgettable trio that’s sure to become a favorite in your kitchen.




    Shout outs



    Shout out to Jersey Girl and Max LevelWe're going to broadcast a game show in MayI'll be the score



    No matter what







    Selfie



    Selfie or no selfie the email is going out - grab it while you are still living, go to whatsthematterwithme.org and click subscribe



    I drove



    Two lane blacktop



    I drove my van. First, around the block. Next, to the library, where I saw men with nowhere else to go walking around the library grounds in the rain an hour before opening. Finally, I drove to Oakland, up 580 and to Piedmont Avenue, to Cato's Ale House. I photographed it from my parking space and texted it to my buddy, lamenting that it was too early for beer. He replied, "It's never too early for beer." It's good to have friends. Shout out to Matt. Turning around, I drove back home.



    Where did kale come from?



    According to the "kale" page of Wikipedia\, Kale came to America in the 19th century from Croatia, brought by USDA botanist David Fairchild, who did not eat it, who detested cabbages of all sorts.



    Borscht



    We have a freezer full of borscht. Chock full of borscht, we have borscht coming out the wazoo. My aunt and uncle were in town and we had them over for lunch. We ate borscht.



























    Two lane blacktop







    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:00:42 - At Breakfast



    00:01:55 - Shout outs



    00:02:56 - Selfie or no selfie



    00:03:20 - I drove my car



    00:04:38 - Fear of driving



    00:05:41 - Men with nowhere else to go



    00:08:16 - Slash at the Oscars \"I\'m Just Ken\"



    00:09:41 - Where did kale come from?



    00:12:11 - Dax Pierson interview upcoming



    00:13:07 - Borscht



    00:13:35 - Aunt and Uncle ate borscht



    00:14:09 - Losing



    00:14:34 - Outro

  • In "Buying A Used Wheelchair," breaking my wheelchair and buying a new one on Craigslist, more record shopping, cooking borscht and getting accepted for publication.



    Every week we order pizza from the place in town. On the day after, for lunch I eat cold pizza with Hoppin Hot Sauce on it.(Hoppin Hot Sauce jingle)



    Those who say don't know & who know don't say



    Buying a used wheelchair selfie



    Subscribers get the selfie and the show notes e mailed to them, and I don't know what they do with them



    Record shopping



    I went record shopping at Amoeba and it turned out to be a pretty good score:




    Something Is Wrong (Vintage Recordings From East Africa)



    Fiona Apple, "Tidal"



    Black Top Blues-a-rama, Volume 2 Live at Tipitina's, New Orleans



    J Dilla, "Donuts"




    The record store person gave me "the nod"



    Terminal Event







    I broke the arm off of my wheelchair, with a bang. The manufacturer was out of stock, but I needed to find a replacement. I got on my computer and I searched eBay and sfbay.craigslist.org. craigslist came through for me



    Cooking While Disabled







    We made borscht. For the second year in a row, we used this Serious Eats recipe for Hot Ukrainian Borscht (With Beets, Beef, Pork, and More)



    Accepted



    After an uninterrupted months-long streak of many rejections, a few different editors wrote me to let me know that my writing was accepted. All in all, a piece of microfiction (in this case, a story of exactly 50 words) and two poems. It's very exciting to turn the corner on this project and move from submission to publication.































    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:05:04 - Subscribers get the selfie



    00:06:01 - Record shopping



    00:13:36 - Terminal event



    00:21:08 - Borscht



    00:27:58 - P.T.



    00:29:30 - Outro

  • In "Swift Correction," Taylor Swift wrote all the songs, hoping everything's okay, and a sprained knee. But first, I'm programming robots to do my bidding! I can feel it-- success is near at hand.Automaton II spent all day working on an automation to send posts created on the Hoppin Hot Sauce blog out to the mailing list automatically. Automations help multiply my actions which is important so I can conserve energy and avoid fatigue that comes with MS. Hopefully, I can stay in better touch with the hot sauce audience.Automaton IISwift Correction selfiePreviously, another automation I made sends new episodes to our What's The Matter With Me? Podcast mailing list. Subscribe today. Subscribers get the selfie along with show notes.Cool thingHoppin Hot Sauce is a disabled owned & operated businessShoppers at our Amazon store support disabled-owned businessHope everything's okayAbout the time when we were driving and we saw two fire trucks and an ambulance. My wife said. "I hope everything's okay." To which I replied, "Clearly, it isn't."Correction: Taylor Swift wrote all the songsCorrection: Taylor Swift wrote all the songsMy wife texted: "The standard edition of 1989 (Taylor's Version) comprises 21 tracks: re-recordings of the 13 songs from the standard edition of 1989, re-recordings of the three bonus tracks from the original deluxe edition, and five previously unreleased "From the Vault" songs that were written for the 2014 album but excluded from the final track list. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1989_(album) I don't think the Taylor's version are covers."Of course, she was right. I tried to explain it in the episode, but it's really very complicated.Path of painThe path of pain began when I sprained my knee. Unfortunately, I fell in my bathroom, and bent it the wrong way. After that, I was leaning heavily on my cane, which caused soreness in my left pectoral area. The pain traveled from there down my arm, stopping in my bicep, forearm, wrist and hand.It was painful, like sitting cross-legged but the heel goes outward instead of inward. The bruise was on the inside of my knee. Recovery proceeds, slowly, haltingly; I'm trying to stay off of it as much as I can.Bueller... Bueller...I'm practicing for the CBEST California substitute teacher exam.Correction: Taylor Swift wrote all the songsChapter List00:00:00 - Intro00:01:43 - Subscribe to get the selfie00:02:27 - Taking the selfie00:03:18 - I created some automatons00:06:22 - Conserving energy00:07:06 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle00:07:24 - Hope everything\'s OK00:08:49 - Taylor Swift Correction00:14:31 - It happens every night00:18:28 - The Path Of Pain00:19:26 - Substitute teacher exam00:21:43 - OutroTaylor SwiftAutomatonHoppin Hot SauceMS (Multiple Sclerosis)Trigeminal NeuralgiaPodcastAutomationPain ManagementDisabilitySubstitute Teacher Exam (CBEST)

  • In "Wheelchair Dig," a dinner party, shout outs and a family trip to the record store.



    Amidst discussions on music finds, including Eminem and Taylor Swift covers, touching on the disappearance of People's Park, radio's outreach to marginalized communities, and the place of 'inspirational' content in disability culture.



    Canvas for hot sauce



    We had our neighbors over for dinner last night and we made pulled pork sandwiches and coleslaw. The kind of thing just perfect for hot sauce.



    All-KFJC Shouts



    Shout out to the sandman who wrote in for a fresh fish recommendation in the South Bay. So I gave up all my spots to him?



    Shout out to Jersey girl and Max level



    There's only one way



    Subscribe and get the selfie



    Wheelchair dig




    https://www.flickr.com/photos/caltex98/46968846481/
    Amoeba Records Berkeley



    Went record shopping at Amoeba in my wheelchair with the family



    Finds




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3_SPhBqG2w




    I found a 3cd set of Codona on ECM used / don cherry nana vasconcelos and collin wallcott. It's proto-'world music'




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5KiSu1-2ko




    my son got eminem's "Marshall Mathers 2". he is having emotional problems, so I see why he is connecting with this.




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JgvVfOfoWI




    My wife and my daughter went in on the taylor swift covers cd taylor's version - electropop, powerful music - the frequencies are on blast, it peels your eyelids back and curls your eyelashes. plenty rizz, more drip than expected, pretty obvious why she's a spectacular pop star



    people's park is gone - three cops guarding the shipping containers blockading it - bad vibes



    Inspiration to who?




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8K9Gg164Bsw




    Is There A Healthy Place For ‘Inspirational’ In Disability Culture? Andrew Pulrang








    Disabled people have complicated relationships with a lot of words. But the one word other than “disability” itself disabled people feel most intensely about may be the word “inspirational.”
    Andrew Pulrang



    Broadcast



    Digging in the crates



    The radio and other broadcast media is egalitarian in the way it approaches disabled people and unpopular people. The voice on the radio is the companion that they have. Homeless people, weirdos, prisoners, anyone who tunes in can listen



    On that note, email me























    Digging in the crates







    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:01:01 - We had our neighbors over



    00:01:30 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle



    00:02:03 - Shout outs



    00:02:10 - south bay fresh fish market recommendations



    00:03:35 - Jersey girl and Max level



    00:04:23 - subscribe and get the selfie



    00:05:31 - record shopping at amoeba Berkeley with the family in my wheelchair



    00:08:00 - i found codona trilogy on ecm 3cd set used



    00:10:54 - my son got eminem



    00:13:25 - taylor swift taylor\'s version cd



    00:18:11 - people\'s park is gone



    00:20:20 - being inspiring is a drag



    00:24:25 - voice is on the radio



    00:25:46 - outro




    People's ParkBerkeleyDisability cultureInspirationalAndrew AngElla YoungRadio broadcastingAmoeba Berkeley (record store)Hoppin Hot SauceRecord shoppingMultiple sclerosisTrigeminal neuralgiaEminemTaylor SwiftJazzHip hop

  • In "The Music Episode:" "Let's Paint TV," Ludacris color story meme, and keeping the kids in their rooms by tuning in to Day Of Noise on KZSU.



    When life gives you shoes.. make shoeanade







    The new shoes that I got in the last episode are working out. They're made by a company called Drew



    I swear it's true



    Semi-transparent guitarist playing a record store "in store" gig with red paint scrawled all over its face



    This is the music episode



    Spicy Roasted Pistachio Nuts







    The Spicy Roasted Pistachios with Hoppin Hot Sauce Extra Hot came out but there was one problem - i couldn't stop eating them - we'll eat them at the Super Bowl, if they last that long



    I'm writing an email blast about them, and I made some cool collages, like this one, of the guy who coined the term 'umami'



    Umami means "delicious taste." in Japanese.



    The Struggle Is Real







    If Sisyphus was alive today, he could have a podcast about going up the hill and rolling the boulder over and AI would say it was a multi-faceted discourse.



    Chairpiphany



    It helps when I search for stuff using my wheelchair not walking around. BC then I actually look around, instead of focusing on walking, trying not to fall, as usual.



    Berkeley Rock Stars




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnQ8N1KacJc




    I got a fragment of The time of your life Green Day song stuck in my head, but only the title, and even that I got wrong.



    Not Like The Others



    If you're like, "This certainly isn’t like another podcast," make sure to subscribe to get the selfie.



    Here Be The River Of Pain



    Changes in the weather: the atmospheric river pointed at California is screwing with my face a bit. Stinging me, stabbing me - out of nowhere.



    Ultimately Very Listenable




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFEY7Aw7S7s&t=1848s




    Thiis is from "Let's Paint TV," hosted by the Los Angeles artist John Kilduff. Once the novelty of his multidisciplinary multitasking wore off, which, I admit, took a while, I found it soothing and ultimately very listenable. He has an etsy store, with lots of items for sale at a very reasonable prices considering the obvious talent involved. For real - I mean, could you do this? I couldn't, and I appreciate him for what he has done.



    Appealing Color Story Hip Hop Rap Ludacris Meme







    I created the Ludacris meme "Mauve birch"



    My Children Were On Lockdown







    It was the day of noise on KZSU. The 24-hour live marathon of noise and experimental sounds kept the kids out of the main room of the house, in their rooms with the doors firmly shut, pretty much all day.



    Keeping It Going







    On the day after Day Of Noise, my daughter had a playdate. While it was going on, I put on Escalo Frio by Otto Von Shirach which was more of the same. Escalo frio means shiver in Spanish. The record features an appearance by Matmos. Before putting it on I told my wife it was dance music and I admit, that was misleading.



    No Test Drive



    Abilities expo isn't happening in the bay area this year but it is happening in Los Angeles in mid March. I can get another of the same wheelchair that I already have, however I would like to have a chance to look at the options in a hands-on way.



    The Music Episode Selfie



    The Music Episode Selfie



    One More Time



    This is the music episode.























    Semi-transparent guitarist playing a record store "in store" gig with red paint scrawled all over its face







    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Funeral song



    00:00:52 - ATMOSPhERIC RIVER TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA



    00:01:13 - New Drew Shoes



    00:03:05 - This is the music episode



    00:03:59 - Ikeda who coined the term \'umami\'



    00:05:13 - HOPPIN HOT SAUCE jingle



    00:05:14 - If Sisyphus was alive today



    00:05:44 - Search by wheelchair



    00:06:54 - \"Good Riddance\" Green Day



    00:08:05 - Get the selfie



    00:10:10 - John Kilduff / Let\'s Paint TV



    00:13:44 - Ludacris meme \"Mauve birch\"



    00:14:44 - KZSU Day Of Noise 2024



  • SEASON 8 EPISODE 4"NEW SHOES 2KXXIV"



    In “NEW SHOES 2KXXIV,” I get new shoes for the first time in years, piece together a classy color scheme of colors with gross-sounding names and austerity in the UK impacts people with disabilities.



    Through this episode, I invite you to join me in unraveling the complexities of this multifaceted experience.



    Hoppin Hot Sauce Toasted Pistachios



    1 cup pistachios, 2 teaspoon whole cumin seed, 1 teaspoon aji-no-moto, 1 Tablespoon Hoppin Hot Sauce, salt, olive oil. Stir together and lay out on a baking sheet lined with a silicone or parchment baking sheet.



    Place in a 350 degree oven for 3 to 4 minutes. Stir, and return to the oven for 3 or 4 minutes, until the cumin is fragraant.



    Let them cool for a few hours. Once I got going, I was unable to stop eating them even for a sip of beer.



    Shout outs



    Shout out to Matt who was into the blood episode - we watched the playoffs with our families



    Geographical Shout outs



    Shout outs to the cities, towns and countries that listen to this podcast



    Green Kitchens Sicken Millions



    Color scheme made up of Gross sounding colors like taupe and puce



    Mauve birch get out the way



    Don't Pull The Trigger On A Face Tattoo



    Reminder to the listeners as an alternative to getting the facial tattoo is to subscribe to the newsletter



    If I were ever to have an advertiser maybe a good one would be tattoo removal



    Cursing For Kids



    Swearing nursery rhymes like Little Miss muffet sat on her motherfucking tuppet eating her curds and way shit



    Stompin' in my Drew Force V







    I got new shoes -



    at walk rite for life



    who set me up with a custom fit, which I need to fit my AFO inside



    Less than total teetotaling



    "one or two beers half-january" is finally over



    Putting us all together







    Due to budget shortfalls, city councils in the United Kingdom are considering cutting assisted living programs and forcing disabled people to move into state-run facilities.




    If you want a symbol of this country’s shredded safety net, look no further than Mark in Bristol.



    For the past 30 years Mark, who has cerebral palsy, has lived in his accessible bungalow with the support of personal assistants. That care package has enabled the 58-year-old to build a life at the heart of his community: from being a governor at the local school and training as a social worker, to holding a season ticket for his beloved Bristol City football club, “It’s more despair than joy,” he smiles.



    From next week, that life could start to disappear. As the latest local authority to strain under growing social care costs and dwindling resources – the city faces a budget hole of £17m next year, expected to rise to £32m in the years to come – Bristol council is proposing a “cost-effective” solution: if a disabled person’s in-home care is not considered “best value”, they could be told to live in a care home instead. It is the stuff of a domestic horror movie: a bureaucrat deems your life too expensive, and you’re forced to pack your bags and spend the rest of your days in an institution.
    Frances Ryan, "Think of this: a plan to ‘warehouse’ disabled people. What kind of nation is Britain becoming?" Thu 25 Jan 2024



    Laughing Fools



    We had our friends over to watch the football game



    I undercooked the beans again but it didn't matter, we had a good time



    Afterwards, my wife and I laughed so much at bedtime, being goofy



    "New Shoes 2KXXIV" Selfie







    Chapter list































    Chapter List






    00:00:00 - Intro



    00:00:48 - Subscribe to get the selfie



    00:01:20 - Young Albert Einstein vs. old Albert Einstein



    00:03:32 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle



    00:03:51 - Hoppin Hot Sauce toasted pistachios recipe



    00:06:11 - Shout outs



    00:07:06 - Geographical shout outs



    00:09:44 - A gross-sounding color scheme



    00:10:51 - Alternative to the facial tattoo



    00:11:45 - If I had an advertiser



  • In "Arte Povera," Aaron "Wheelz" Fotheringham hits the skatepark in his WCMX wheelchair, we learn how to pronounce 'arte povera' and MS plays third wheel.



    Shout out




    Shout out to Jersey Girl who wrote in to let me know she was a diggin' on the new theme song




    @aaronwheelz WCMX GETTIN' RAD




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEXsDdhgX-s





    Aaron "Wheelz" Fotheringham WCMX disabled extreme wheelchair at the skate park. Watching his videos blew my mind and made me proud




    Arte Povera Selfie








    Put the selfie in and remind listeners to subscribe



    When was the height of the sound effects- do you remember the sound effects? Contact me and I will give you an incredible shoutout that warps time and space due to its epicness




    Famous Quotations: Edison & Rakim




    When you have explored all possibilities, remember this - you haven't.
    Thomas Edison




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y1Emb7Jyks
    Don't sweat the technique



    Cats are big




    We can always make a social media profile for our pet cat. people love cats!




    Video art, eh?




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQddRHtt0Ts





    The video that comes up when you search "Arte povera pronunciation" is like a work in itself




    Door Update








    The ancient giant door of opportunity is wide open, with light shining through




    Stitches/Staple Update




    I don't have any stitches or staples in my head or anywhere else in my body at the time of this recording



    The stitches fell out in the shower. Just the end of them. They were brown




    Three's Company








    Everyone who is in a relationship with me is also in a relationship with multiple sclerosis, including my friends and family




    #1: Ask before you help




    United Spinal Association disability etiquette guide was a concise read that offers interesting perspective on how to treat disabled people respectfully




    Acceptance




    acceptance of gravity like acceptance last time - gravity is a constant force




    Time's up



    See you next week! Don't forget to contact me for a Shout Out in the next episode



    While you're there, subscribe to get new episode emails



































    Chapter List






    00:00:01 - Intro



    00:00:46 - Shout outs



    00:01:17 - disabled inspiration: Aaron Fotheringham WCMX rider



    00:05:00 - selfie



    00:05:28 - to get the full experience, you must subscribe to whats the matter with me?



    00:05:39 - do you remember the sound effects?



    00:06:24 - kid\'s baseball league debacles



    00:08:23 - disabled inspiration: remembering pitcher Jim Abbott



    00:09:12 - Quote: Thomas Edison



    00:10:45 - Quote: Eric B. & Rakim



    00:11:39 - People Love Cats



    00:11:54 - arte povera Pronunciation Video



    00:14:45 - Ancient Giant Door of Opportunity



    00:15:34 - no stitches or staples



    00:16:38 - Everyone who is in a relationship with me



    00:19:09 - Disability Etiquette Guide



    00:22:51 - Outro

  • In "Ancient Cattle Herders," scientists solve a genetic mystery about multiple sclerosis, Christina Applegate goes on the Emmys, and we read about how acceptance is key.



    Caused by people with horses



    Surely a big deal with far-reaching implications




    Scientists crack mystery of how MS gene spread



    10th January 2024, 08:09 PSTShare



    By Philippa RoxbyHealth reporter



    An international team of scientists say they have unearthed the answer in the DNA of ancient teeth and bones.



    The genes which protected our ancestors from animal diseases now raise the risk of multiple sclerosis (MS).



    The researchers call their discovery "a quantum leap" in understanding the evolution of the disease.



    And they say it could change opinions on what causes MS, and have an impact on the way it is treated.
    https://bbc.com/news/health-67917294



    Surely a big deal with far-reaching implications, but I'm not 100% sure what they are. Something to do with ancient cattle herders, beasts and DNA helixes like you see above.



    Remember




    Reminder to put the selfie in and don't forget it like last time, remind listeners to subscribe




    ancient cattle herders selfie



    90s are back: E-Mail




    I sent an “it's good to start the season” email



    Email is big bc the 90s are back




    Emmy TV Moment




    Christina Applegate on the Emmys was a huge moment that increased MS consciousness




    Having That Falling Feeling Inside




    Fell in the house Wednesday at 10:45am. my wife was here.



    I bled a little from one of the stitches, but didn't open up and stopped pretty quick when I iced it so I didn't go to the ER but I think this still counts as a fall



    If Christina Applegate did it, we would say, "she fell."




    If it's the last thing I ever do




    Fellow KFJC DJs reach out to me to take part in stuff, but I can barely make it around my house



    Moving to San Leandro added 9 minutes and a bridge to what had been a straight shot from east san jose



    I'm not walking very well



    I would be there if I could be



    I need to figure out my wheelchair transport situation




    Like a helicopter




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xdVXV8_yHE





    The wall blew off on that 737 Max 9




    Come up off that




    We got permits for solar last year but we've kind of been dragging our feet with the sales people and this year they want to take our money and now I'm getting calls from the operations department




    Not a word








    No one agrees to publish my poetry and to an extent that shouldn't be a surprise




    Acceptance is key








    Blog post about disability and acceptance that I thought added valuable perspective to my situation




    @johnhoppin




    https://twitter.com/johnhoppin/status/1742292361139621970




    Chapters




    00:00:01 - Intro



    00:01:11 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle



    00:01:25 - Ancient cattle herders brought MS genes



    00:05:59 - Selfie



    00:07:14 - “it\'s good to start a season” email



    00:08:31 - Christina Applegate on the Emmys



    00:14:29 - Fell in the house



    00:15:34 - Stuck in the house



    00:17:48 - The wall blew off on that 737 Max 9



    00:18:58 - I\'m getting calls from the operations department



    00:20:13 - Poetry publication



    00:20:52 - Accepting disability blog post



    00:24:09 - twitter bon jovi



    00:24:38 - Outro

  • Welcome to the Season 8 Premiere, "New Pie Cutter"



    In this episode, "New Pie Cutter" which is a kind of smorgasbord episode, we celebrate the new year, the new season, the new theme song. People get ready, the new episode is here and ready for liftoff.



    Shout outs



    s




    Shout out to the sandman



    Contact me on the contact form to get a shout out

    Maybe the best shout out you'll ever have, or that anyone'll ever have






    New Pie Cutter








    To avoid a repeat of this year's thanksgiving gorefest, I ordered a metal pie cutter on ebay, with a stainless steel blade and a silver handle -



    it's here and it's beautiful and sturdy




    Dinner a la GoGo




    GoGo has limitations as a dating service



    an awkward seating arrangement



    at least they got a name change




    TV burial








    bought a big new tv bc mine crapped out after 15 years




    What's causing it




    Dad butt dialed me again and he was like well. what happens is,I keep my phone in my back pocket, i think i butt dialed you




    Maxims




    I will try to eat cheese no matter how old it is just to see



    A pint is a pound the world around




    Correct Technique



    correct and incorrect swallowing techniques




    Swallow while staring at your sternum



    I learned it from Koko




    Wheelchair Fake News



    With my son




    parts on my wheelchair broke in airline baggage



    "jazzy passport is discontinued"



    and other lies the wheelchair salesman told me




    Notes








    making memes









    yogurt marinade





    Mix 1 cup yogurt, 2 tsp Hoppin Hot Sauce, and 1.5 tsp salt



    Pour over 8 boneless chicken thighs and rest for at least four and up to twentyfour hours



    Grill and eat over rice with some white sauce and extra hot sauce to taste




    AI Guy




    I posted a picture of myself that was made by AI and I put it as my story and a lot of people haven't heard from in a long time contacted me and maybe didn't realize the picture was not of me but it was a hallucination by AI




    Admission




    the triage nurse at the hospital asked me if i used to be a wrestler




    Chapters




    00:02:37 - shoutouts



    00:03:02 - I ordered a metal pie cutter on ebay



    00:04:43 - GoGo has limitations as a dating service



    00:07:55 - bought a tv bc mine crapped out after 15 yr



    00:09:33 - Dad butt dialed me again and he was like well. what happens is,I keep my phone in my back pocket, i think i butt dialed you



    00:10:01 - I will try to eat cheese no matter how old it is just to see



    00:10:25 - A pint is a pound the world around



    00:12:38 - Swallowing while staring at your sternum



    00:15:53 - parts on my wheelchair broke in airline baggage



    00:21:22 - jazzy passport is discontinued (and other lies the salesman told me)



    00:21:58 - maxims



    00:22:19 - Hoppin Hot Sauce Jingle



    00:22:28 - cooking yogurt chicken (with recipe)



    00:23:27 - I posted a picture of myself that was made by AI



    00:24:35 - i\'ve been bleeding all from my head



    00:25:43 - the triage nurse at the hospital asked me if i used to be a wrestler



    00:28:57 - pus head experience / pus head the artist

  • Welcome to "Can You Eat Blood?" the first episode after a break for a few weeks. I had trigeminal neuralgia face pain, so I took a a couple of weeks off. I think AI would say that these are bunch of unrelated thoughts.



    Shout-outs




    Shout out to the poet Joe Imwalle who called me to thank me for sending a link to his linktree while at the same time insinuating (correctly or not) that almost no one listens to my podcast.



    Joe played guitar in my high school band and now he's a published poet



    Shout out to Jeremiah Jahnson who gave us a shout out on KFJC, Saturday morning at 8:30



    Shoutout to Hoppin Hot Sauce




    Gray room




    We went on a date at Yonsei Handrolls because the movie was too long to do otherwise




    What To Do




    When you have MS people are alwaays sending you scholarly articles like this one




    Caramelized shallots








    Chicken and pasta with caramelized shallots




    Thanksgiving




    Thanksgiving is for 14 this year



    Thanksgiving menu




    5% salt




    I wrote the sauerkraut recipe for the school recipe book




    I can breathe again




    The espresso machine is back




    No Swap




    We're taking a break from the Booze-Only Yankee Swap this year




    Face on the fritz




    My face is bothering me due to the storms in the atmosphere



    Unfortunately I couldn't eat dinner with my family



    I had a scrambled egg on some rice so it's not like I'm dying




    Turkey Brain




    A week away and the Thanksgiving meal took over my mind



    I hope that I will be in the clear and so I can enjoy eating the meal and not be in fear



    I'm put in the meat order after trying to put it in back in October and they were like, "We'll do it next week." I'm either super early or coming in in the nick of time




    Cool hipster shoes




    The guy at the mobility shoe store asked me what kind of shoes I want and I said I was a hipster and I was cool and he said so you want dress shoes?




    Too Much Blood




    Jan hasn't been able to smell anything since he was 18



    Nami drank Jan's blood



    But at least she didn't drink her piss




    Rejection




    Uniform Rejection of All writing submissions




    Disability studies




    Disability major at UCLA, first at a CA public university




    Mysterious note




    "Not just the bad stuff but the stuff I thought was really good"




    Washed up




    In a discussion of popular music John John told us Lady Gaga is washed up

  • Welcome to What's The Matter With Me? Podcast Season 7. Episode 31, "God Of Thunder"






    The provided text seems to be a collection of various unrelated topics and updates, including shoutouts, a fundraiser for KFJC, an art acquisition by SFMOMA, the outcome of a baseball game, discussions about tucking in a t-shirt, an exploration of self-sufficiency, cooking, and conversations about toxic behavior with your son.
    ChatGPT



    Shout Outs








    Shoutouts to Rocky who dug the face tattoo idea

    Remember to use the drawer.



    Repeat: do not get a face tattoo, just a drawer full of scraps of paper with tattoo ideas written on them





    Shouts out to Max Level, standing at the edge of an inky black ocean holding a torch aloft




    Fundraiser is done



    2023 KFJC Artist Shirt by Abigail Mae




    The KFJC fundraiser wrapped up bc we raised our operating budget for the coming year



    I donated to fundraiser @ KFJC and got the artist shirt (pictured above)




    Outsider Granted Entry



    JOSEPH ALEF, UNTITLED (JA 072), 2018, WORK ON PAPER, 22 X 30 INCHES via Creative Growth




    “SFMOMA’s investment marks a historic milestone in the contemporary art world,” said Ginger Shulick Porcella, Executive Director at Creative Growth Art Center. “It has been far too long that art institutions have ignored or underrecognized artists with disabilities. These talented creators can no longer be relegated to the category of ‘outsider artists’ as they firmly occupy the walls of museums worldwide.”
    SFMOMA




    SF MoMA makes histric acquisition of works from Creaative Growth/Creativity Explored/NIAD artists




    Rangers In 5




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVbOQzgQKNk





    Diamondbacks lost the world series in five games to the Rangers



    As promised, I now have an Adolis Garcia Rangers jersey on order for my son




    Locked In With Deepak




    https://twitter.com/DeepakChopra/status/1704637821493919867





    https://twitter.com/johnhoppin/status/1704637997222920243




    Art School Job Prospects








    The person who named cymbals had a really cool job



    Do you think the hiring manager had other well qualified candidates?




    Keep your shoes on








    Tucking in a t-shirt in doesn't make it look any more formal



    If you are in my family, it makes you look like a pumpkin who thinks that a tucked in t-shirt is appropriate to wear to an event that it clearly is not



    Otherwise, you wouldn't tuck it in your silly t-shirt.




    Everybody needs directions








    Even Jesus Christ was not perfect




    God of Thunder








    I was the drummer from Def Leppard for Halloween



    Tight reviews: one reviewer was 5'9" 230 lbs "pretty sure my junk was showing"



    The tights fit, and I don't think my junk was showing




    Exploration in Self-sufficiency








    I took the kids to school by myself, picked them up, fed them, bath, and bedtime



    So my wife could go to San Diego on a work trip




    Green sauce for steak and vegetables




    What we're cooking now: grilled skirt steak with new potatoes & the real chimichurri




    Get every last drop




    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBtu3zhSD40&t=3s





    Judy woodruff & Dan Doctoroff on PBS Newshour Disability Reframed segment about squeezing every last bit out of life





    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXZUV2pX584





    Washington Phillips on Dust-to-Digital




    Toxic messaging




    Talking to my son about the imagined bullies in middle school



    Trying to introduce the concept that making fun of a adisabled person is a toxic behavior, and as he gets older it's going to be important to see that clearly



    I am not at all sure that will help him