Episodit
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Happy New Year, kinksters! I’m back with another episode of Bonding and this one is a JUICY one! 💦
I’ve recently been reflecting on the work that I do, both as a Humanistic Integrative Therapist and Kink Coach and Educator, and feeling fascinated and privileged at witnessing the amazing transformations that happen when people can embrace their kinky selves.
Something I have witnessed when working with these Kink focused clients, is how the topic of sex, kink and pleasure, quickly open up this door to other parts of themselves that could otherwise take much longer for therapy clients to connect with. This is where, and I’ve spoken about this on the podcast before - kink really is a great form of shadow work.
I suppose the main point of these reflections is that I have always found the work I do from a kink lens to go a lot deeper a lot quicker, because we’re already in the shadows from the start, which makes it much easier to reach those more vulnerable parts of ourselves.
So I’m celebrating this work and sharing with you my insights on how kink can help us to connect to our full authentic selves, both inside and outside of the bedroom!
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Greetings, fellow kinksters! I’m back with another episode of Bonding and today’s special focus is on impact play. In this jam-packed podcast, we dive deep into the art of impact - uncovering the science behind why we enjoy pain-based pleasure, discussing essential safety and communication practices, and revealing insider techniques to level up your impact play skills.
And for those of you in the London area, get ready for an unforgettable experience! We're hosting an in-person impact play workshop on December 18th, perfect for couples and pairs who want to learn in a fully equipped dungeon setting. This partnered event will guide you through impact fundamentals, introduce a variety of sensual implements, and provide personalized feedback to help you build confidence and expand your impact repertoire. Space is limited, so don't wait to reserve your spot.
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Blood Lust Confessions - Halloween Cocktails & Kink! 🎙️
Join us for a deliciously tantalizing episode as I dive into the wildest confessions from Blood Lust, our latest Halloween cocktail and kink event! This episode, we’re sharing some of the community’s most daring and dirty secrets, straight from the confession box.
Get ready for juicy tales of messy play, bold exhibitionism, and fabulous fantasies that reveal just how uninhibited—and creative—our attendees can be. From naughty experiences to their deepest desires, each confession is a glimpse into the seductive underworld of kink.
Intrigued? Don’t miss out on the next unforgettable night! Join us on Tuesday, December 17th at Looking Glass Cocktail Club for our next social gathering. Tickets are available now at subinthecity.com. Come for the cocktails, stay for the confessions... 🍸💋
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In this episode of Bonding, I dive into the nuanced differences between slave and service submission within the BDSM dynamic. I answer a listener's question about the two terms, discussing how each reflects varying degrees of power exchange and submission styles. While "slave" often evokes stronger emotions due to historical and non-consensual connotations, I explores how, in BDSM, it can also represent a consensual power dynamic. On the other hand, service submission highlights voluntary acts of devotion without the same intensity of control.
As always, I share the importance of intentionality and self-awareness in choosing these terms, reminding listeners that BDSM is all about customizing dynamics that feel empowering and consensual for both parties. Tune in to discover how to navigate these roles while being mindful of language and its impact.
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Spooky season has begun and I'm back in your earbuds with another episode of Bonding. This week I talk to you about etiquette - the do's and don'ts when you're chatting up potential kinky partners. I discuss how to initiate conversations with like-minded kinksters and the process that can help create authentic connections with awareness. I touch on leading from a place of safety, trust and respect.
Tune in to hear me talk about the importance of first impressions online and how just because you're on a sex positive platform doesn't mean you need to lead with sex. I share my thoughts on how to engage in respectful communication and ways to check in with your intensions before and during engagement.
Come join us for our Halloween Cocktails and Kink: 'Blood Lust' party on 30th October at the Looking Glass Cocktail Club in London. Tickets available hereSupport the show
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Sarah and Carlos ask each other three mystery questions . The result? A glorious episode of memory sharing, confessions, gratitude and love.
Tune in to this bonus episode of Bonding to hear more from Sarah and her Dom/fiancé Carlos. Having established a relationship for a couple of years before bringing in kink dynamics, Sarah and Carlos share how having privacy and going self-employed helped them build a successful D/s lifestyle together.
We hear Sarah and Carlos confess to feeling shy during the start of their relationship regarding communicating their desires. And how transparency and being blunt are great tools of honesty to exercise throughout a relationship, particularly in regards to playing with new concepts of intimacy.Support the show
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Just with any dating process, determining whether someone is right for you, or has the potential to develop something with you takes time and awareness.
Within the world of kink, vetting is a very common part of dating and socialising. With vetting, we are checking out a person's vibe and whether we like them. It is a process of obtaining information about someone you wish to get to know on a sexual or romantic level.But remember, this isn’t about finding a good dom or a good sub. Instead, we are simply finding a good human to connect with and explore with safely.
I guide you through some kink related questions that can be good to ask to help you get a feel for a persons level of understanding and intention when it comes to entering into a kinky dynamic.
I hope these tips help you on your journey, and if you want to meet a community of likeminded kinksters then be sure to come along to our cocktails and kink social events in London – the next one is Thursday 8th August.Support the show
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BDSM and kink is all about PLAY! However the censorship of BDSM within mainstream media feeds into this societal misconception that adulting is hard, and boring, and serious. That adults are not allowed to PLAY!
It is said that we lose our creativity as we get older. Even the schooling system is designed in a way to discourage us to think outside of the box; it is designed to keep us confined within the box of what is considered “the norm”.Therefore, it is no surprise that BDSM & Kink is still censored today because it is a lifestyle that encourages us to think outside of the box and have fun.
This week I talk through the array of playful sensory experiences BDSM can allow, having witnessed it first hand with the incredible people I work with in our Sub in the City workshops and events.
If you’d like to flex your kinky creative skills with us, then be sure to sign up for our BDSM Scene Building workshop & social on 12th September, where I’ll be showing you how to create exciting BDSM Scenes by thinking outside the box!Support the show
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Do you identify as a BRAT? Do you love to test your Dom and take control? Or do you wish you could surrender more?
In this episode I break down the difference between bratting and ‘topping from the bottom’ as well as giving all submissives some top tips on the ways to ask your Dom for what you want without it taking away from your submissive experience.I break down some of the behaviours that you might notice when topping from the bottom, ask you some important questions to get clear on your intentions, and give a little reminder about how to co-create a power dynamic that works for ALL involved.
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Today I'm sharing some top tips on tapping into your intuition to help you spot red flags, identify your boundaries, and most importantly, uphold these boundaries.
Our intuition is our gut feeling, that sense that we can’t always tell what it is, but it’s a deep knowing that is often never wrong.
Of course this doesn’t just apply in kink contexts, but in all of our actions and decisions in life, it’s just that within the world of kink, we get a really good opportunity to practice flexing this wonderful magical muscle of ours.
I hope this episode helps you in becoming more conscious in your kinky exploration, and as always, if you have any questions or anything you’d like to hear more of, just drop me a message!
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In this episode, Carlos and I are back on the couch answering your kinky questions again.
We talk about all things communication, playfulness, sex parties and libido.
Want to learn more about these topics? Head to subinthecity.com to find online workshops and details about in-person events for you to expand your curiosity and get top tips from leading professionals in the field of BDSM.Support the show
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In this episode, I share with you the ways in which BDSM & Kink can allow us to welcome in our shadows. Whether it be limiting beliefs, insecurities, fears or shame, I explain how eroticising these feelings helps us take back control and embody our most authentic selves with confidence. I’ll also share with you how to get started or to reflect on how kink is already supporting you to release the beliefs that commonly hold us back in life!
You can download your limits and boundaries checklist for free on my website - What are your kinky shadows, and how have you brought them into the light? I’d love to know!If you found this episode useful, please give it a like and a follow and a review on Spotify goes a long way to helping me spread the kinky love and education.
Also, if there’s anything you want to hear, or a burning kinky question you’re dying to have answered (it can remain anonymous), then drop me a DM on insta or email me, my inbox is always open.
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BDSM – an acronym that can sound incredibly intimidating.
In this quick and dirty episode, I talk about the barriers to entry that come with the term BDSM, define what kink actually is, and explore what it truly means to explore the BDSM lifestyle.
Let’s challenge what we’ve been taught about sex and start to uncover our true desires, bringing those shadows into the light!Support the show
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In this episode, I discuss BDSM collars, their meaning, and why we use them. I also touch on the collars I wear, and how you can start to consider using a collar that feels aligned to you in your power play dynamic.
In this episode, I talk about my stainless steel collar that I got from Him and Her Erotic Steel. I also speak about my day collar that I got from Creidhne Studio on Esty.
If you'd like to learn more about the upcoming couples retreat, please visit my website.Support the show
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In this episode, I am joined by my Dom/fiance as we answer some of your questions about our D/s dynamic and kink in general. We go into topics such as navigating your kinkiness in dating, long-distance must-dos, coming out about your kinks, working with your cycle in D/s, communication and so much more. We really enjoyed answering these questions and there will definitely be a part 2!
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Welcome back to season 2 of Bonding! In this episode, I open up about my own kink journey, where it began, some of the mishaps and learnings along the way, and give you some of my biggest insights I wish I knew in my early days. I also share how my journey led me to become a BDSM Coach & Kink Educator, AND how letting go of unrealistic expectations led me to find the love of my life.
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What TF is Conscious Kink? This term “conscious” has become a bit of a buzzword in the spiritual and sexual wellness spaces, but it’s not as intimidating as it sounds! In this episode, I debunk the idea that Kink can’t be conscious, and explain how more likely than not, you’re already practising conscious kink!
Join me for an evening of Conscious Kink in London on Thursday 29th June.Support the show
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Have you been feeling stuck recently? Perhaps your kinky play sessions are not quite hitting the spot or you're feeling uninspired and not sure where to go next? In this episode, I discuss some common roadblocks in BDSM & Kink and how to navigate them.
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How do you keep things fresh when you’re in a long-distance D/s dynamic? BDSM requires commitment and consistency which means LD dynamics can be difficult to navigate at first. Whether you’re fully LD or you need some tips for when you’re apart from your partner, check out this episode on how to keep the kink alive when you’re not together physically.
Check out my sexy summer event: Cocktails & Kink - Earlybird tickets on sale now!Support the show
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Isn’t BDSM meant to be painful? Isn’t the risk all part of the fun? …yes and no. There are so many misconceptions around BDSM and how it should be experienced. In this episode, I debunk some common stereotypes and talk about my own experiences of how these misconceptions are only reinforcing the stigma attached to kink.
Join me on March 16th in the Dungeon for my BDSM Scene Building Workshop.Support the show
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