Episodit
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Our guest today is Anna Seewald, M. Ed, a wife, a mom, an author, a speaker, a photographer, a podcaster, an educator, a lifelong learner and the founder of Authentic Parenting. Authentic Parenting is her business and podcast and it's all about parenting from the heart.
Anna lost her mother in a severe earthquake in Armenia in 1988 when she was only 13, and her father became her sole caregiver. She always had a great relationship with her father who was very emotional, encouraging, and understanding, but through this tragedy, they grew even closer.
Anna came to America when she was 27 with her father's full blessing, after receiving a scholarship from the U.S. State Department. Her father remains a supportive champion in her life to this day.
She described her father's parenting style as authentic and from him and through her studies and casework Anna developed her business and podcast, Authentic Parenting, where she is a divorce mediator who also teaches parenting classes, both selective and court-ordered.
Links:
Authentic Parenting with Anna Seewald
Anna Seewald and Authentic Parenting on Instagram
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Our guest today is Robert Bullock. Robert grew up on the Gulf Coast of Mississippi giving him his southern roots. At an early age, Robert possessed a strong interest in anything fashion related and with his drive and passion he became a successful designer, with an expertise in draping, pattern making, and sewing. His current company, Robert Bullock Bride, has been his most fulfilling business to date, both personally as well as professionally. Robert has lived in NYC for the past 30 years. He is an activist for human rights and equality. He also volunteers at Best Friends Animal Shelter, being an advocate for the animals who need him to fight for their rights as well.
Jonathan and Robert discuss the unusual and amazing connection between the death of Robert's father and his future son. After his father's passing, Robert was looking for a place to just relax and have a few minutes by himself. It was at a local restaurant where Robert met Oscar, who would later become his son.
They discuss how Oscar showed up in New York City and how he and Robert developed a father/son relationship that has changed his life in so many ways. Not thinking he would ever be a father before this, Robert has embraced the fortuitous gift he was given after telling his father (to the sky), "Old man, you better do me right from the other side."
Links:
Robert Bullock Bride
Robert Bullock Bride on Instagram
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Our guest today is Karen Lock Kolp, a child development expert, and parent coach. Her podcast, We Turned Out Okay, has been downloaded more than 300,000 times by parents who just want to know that, really, everything is going to be alright. Jonathan and Karen talk about her upbringing and the role her father played in her life. They also talk about modern parenting and how we adopt some of the traits of our parents while simultaneously learning to trust our own instincts. Karen opens up about a difficult childhood memory, her own chronic illness, and how almost losing her father helped bring even more perspective to her life.
Links:
Karen's podcast, We Turned Out Okay
Karen's YouTube Channel
Karen's Twitter, @weturnedoutokay
Karen's Instagram, @weturnoutokay
We Turned Okay on Facebook
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This week we get a more up close and personal glimpse into our host Jonathanâs life. He shares his background as a son and father, the passion behind this podcast, and why he wanted to pay homage to his own parents and open up the discussion to encompass all aspects of fatherhood, family life, and even difficult topics such as loss and grief. He shares how fatherhood compares to his expectations and visions of how it would be, and the differences between how he grew up and the way he is raising his own children.
Key Takeaways
[1:31] Dads are more than welcome to enjoy the podcast of course, but this show is not just for men or fathers. Itâs an exploration of the meaning of parenthood, loss, expectations and much more, and the guests will range from mothers, daughters, fathers, grandfathers, etc.
[1:58] Jonathan is the single father of two teenagers â one 16-year-old son and a 14-year-old daughter. He is now working full-time as a writer and podcaster and enjoys the freedom of a flexible schedule.
[9:22] Jonathan has always wanted to be a father and still looks at his teens with amazement that he was one half of creating them.
[12:16] One of Jonathanâs favorite things about being a parent is giving and receiving unconditional love.
[17:00] Jonathanâs favorite piece of his advice from his father was to not rush life and miss the special moments in front of you.
[21:39] Really listening to our children can sometimes be a lost art. Practice putting the phone away, turning off the laptop and giving them your undivided attention.
[27:30] Jonathan recaps the past six episodes and their individual running themes and takeaways. He also gives us a tease of the guests in upcoming episodes.
Quotes:
- âWhat does fatherhood mean to me? Everything.â
- âMy dad was an unbelievable friend, and unbelievable father and I hope I provide that to my children.â
- âIf you want to have a conversation with your kid and your phone is out, thatâs not a conversation.â
Mentioned in this Episode:
Jonathan Greene on Medium
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Todayâs guest is Craig Johnson, an old camp buddy of Jonathanâs. Craig has an extremely busy and full life; he and his wife Liz have been married for 20 years and are both attorneys. Together they have three children â Ben, 16; Sam, 13; and Lucy, 8. Craig shares the lessons he has learned from coaching his own kids, how his career experience as an attorney, lobbyist, and State Senator has shaped his approach towards parenting, the challenge of balance and enjoyment of his kidsâ success and the evolution of Craigâs own father as a grandfather. The guys also admit to being a little overeager when texting their kids, and why they canât be too upset when there is empty ice cream in the fridge.
Key Takeaways:
[1:24] Jonathan and Craig met at Camp Taconic. Here they learned a lot about independence (for both the children and the parents) and he now sends his own kids to camp.
[3:20] He and his wife Liz have been married for 20 years and he is very grateful for their partnership both as husband and wife and as co-parents. They are both attorneys, with Craig in lobbying and public policy, and Liz in the courtroom as a defense attorney and former prosecutor. And yes, Craig loses all the arguments in the house. Craig was a former State Senator in New York from 2007-2010.
[4:49] Craig and Jonathan both have sons named Ben who are teens learning to drive while terrifying their parents.
[8:37] Craig finds coaching a rewarding experience and found a great way to bond with his kids while taking part in something they love.
[19:16] Both Jonathan and Craig allow their kids to use phones and social media apps, but monitor them to make sure there isnât any shady business going on. Craigâs wife Liz teaches a class for parents to help them understand and deal with their children using social technology.
[27:35] Bar and Bat Mitzvah season is underway, and while it can get expensive and time-consuming, itâs an amazing accomplishment and Craig is extremely proud of how much his sonsâ bar mitzvahs got their family together.
[36:28] Craigâs dad lives in the very same house that he grew up in, only about a mile and a half away. He had the model attitude as a grandfather where he was there if Craig needed him but trusted him to make the right decisions and learn on his own.
[43:31] Craig finds one of the biggest challenges is balancing his dedication to being a father, a husband, and to his career.
[45:02] The best part of parenting for Craig is sharing in their successes, whether itâs something big, such as a sports team win or an everyday moment of them memorizing a vocabulary word.
[51:29] Karma has come back around for all the years that Craig left an empty ice cream container in the fridge, as his kids to that to him now.
[55:47] Both dads are puzzled why their sons donât have the same rush of getting their driver's license as they did as teens.
[58:52] Craig has a lot of interesting work in his pipeline, including Uber, AirBnB, and cryptocurrency.
[59:42] Craig is extremely appreciative of his wifeâs ability to be a stand out counselor, lawyer, and mother. She is a fantastic example of showing his children the importance of work and responsibility.
Links:
Camp Taconic
Dentons Law Firm
Quotes:
âIâm almost in tears when I drop off my kids at high school! I mean thatâs good about us, but whatâs wrong with us?!â âMy son wrote a one-page essay on why he should watch Dexter and I read it and was like âokay you could watch it because that was so good.ââ âWe canât always be there for them, and we have to let them make those mistakes.â âThey each have different jealousies and different desires and itâs just a moving puzzle that changes every day.â âIâve become a better listener as a parent. You have to listen to your kids and let them talk. They can educate you.â -
Todayâs guest is Rob Schiffmann, actor, improviser, musician and most importantly - father. Rob and Jonathan grew up together and reminisce about their Tuesday baseball games and what it taught them to be great fathers of their own. They also talk about the unique path Rob had growing up with two great parents and stepparents, and examine the relationship of weekend parenting. Rob now has two daughters and they examine the delicate balance between staying involved and letting your children have space to do their own thing.
Key Takeaways:
[2:07] Jonathan and Rob reminisce about their Tuesday baseball at Plaza Park. One of the staples of the recurring meet-up was watching the dads (and sometimes moms) participating.
[5:33] Robâs parents went through a divorce, but it resulted in him having two great stepparents, and his parents remaining good friends.
[12:46] Even in his 80âs, Robâs dad is constantly learning and is very interested in arts, continued education and current events.
[13:25] They explore the dadâs side of having the kids only on the weekend. Both remember the activities way more than the actual homes.
[16:13] Robâs stepfather Larry was a kind and gentle soul, and did not impose himself on the family, rather he was present and showed love. He credits Larry with helping him develop a gentle approach in life, and isnât afraid to show his soft side.
[18:36] Rob and his wife Annie have been married for 10 years, and they have two daughters, Abby, age 7 and Penny, age 4. As the dad of two young daughters he laughs a lot, and his daughter Penny loves to take on different characters and role play til her heartâs content. Abby is a great older sister and joins in on all the fun escapades.
[24:40] Rob never thought he would follow in the footsteps of his mother and lick his finger to clean food off his daughters face as it drove him crazy, but now he does it all the time.
[27:49] Staying involved while giving your children room to be themselves and grow and learn on their own is of utmost importance to both Rob and Jonathan.
[31:31] The irony of parenting is that you raise your children as best you can, to have them leave and live their best life on their own.
[38:34] Our kids are little versions of us, so showing them how to communicate, apologize and share their emotions is one of the joys of fatherhood.
[39:33] Watching his own parents interact with his daughters is amazing to Rob. They are engaged grandparents and his children adore them. This is a peek into his own past and he experiences nostalgia remembering his own time with his dad.
[41:12] There is a renaissance of fatherhood now with grandfathers, as things are more open now than when most of us were growing up.
[45:37] You can check out one of the many projects Rob is currently working on at: Broadwayâs Next Hit Musical.
Mentioned in This Episode:
Broadwayâs Next Hit Musical
RobSchiffman
Quotes:
âI scored in the parent and stepparent market. I had two role models and two big influences on who I became as a father and as a man. They paved an interesting and different path.â âMy dad is intimidatingly intelligent.â âI feel like I have these two little pals that I get to take care of. We just have fun.â âI donât care if they are 7 or 47, I never want to blur the lines where Iâm just a friend and not their parent. We are here to serve them.â âThey donât need to peek through the scenes and see the neurotic dude that I am. They just need me to take care of them.â -
This weekâs episode features father of two, husband, and City Dads co-founder Lance Somerfeld. Lance frequently contributes to the conversation about modern fatherhood and has appeared on local and national television, including CNN, Fox News, Today, and Katie. Lance talks about living in New York City as a father, how he went from public school teacher to a stay-at-home dad, the formation, growth, and purpose of City Dads and how they are single-handedly helping thousands of men become more confident and involved fathers.
Key Takeaways:
[1:50] Lance Somerfeld shares the background of how he went from public school teacher to stay-at-home dad. He and co-founder Matt Schneider started City Dads in November 2008 and it has been going strong for 10 years with 34 cities in the U.S. and nearly 11,000 members. They wanted a place for dads to go to feel welcome and able to connect with other fathers and kids in a fun and meaningful way.
[18:02] City Dads works with brands in a long-lasting personal relationship on campaigns and products crafted from the perspective on dads. They have worked with Dove on the messaging for their March Madness NCAA Tournament ad and partnered with Britax to help dads learn all about using car seats correctly.
[24:34] Lance has been married for almost 14 years, and together they have a 9-year-old son and 2-year-old daughter. City Dads not only provides great opportunities for the dads but gives the kids another great group of friends outside of their school.
[34:56] As both an active parent and son, Lance found it interesting to see his dad and stepdad as modern grandfathers as they learn and adapt to the times today.
[39:11] Lance found the biggest challenge of fatherhood early on was learning to navigate a life where you had to plan and saying goodbye to a lot of spontaneity and free personal time!
[43:16] One perk of City Dads is new fathers learning from those who have already been through it and made it out of the other side.
Mentioned in This Episode:
City Dads
The Modern Dads Podcast
Quotes:
âEverything I had done during the course of my life, like going to school and college, was preparing me for my career. Nothing that I had done previously ever really prepared me to be a dad.â âWhen I became a parent I couldnât believe that I had to dictate orders to my parents on how to handle my own child.â âI think itâs a very exciting time to be a dad right now, on so many levels.â -
Today we jump back in with Part 2 of Jonathanâs conversation with Alison Donnelly. Alison is a stay-at-home mom living in Brooklyn and is married to one of Jonathanâs long-time best friends Dan. She and Jonathan talk about what it is like to lose a parent, compare end-of-life stories of their parents and any regrets they may still have, the mixed emotions of watching your children grow up and even slip in the best Barbie cake story you may ever hear!
Key Takeaways:
[1:11] Alison tells the story of getting the tough phone calls during her fatherâs death. Jonathan waited almost a full year before he talked to his friends about his momâs death and finds technology a useful tool when dealing with breaking the news to people.
[14:21] Alisonâs number-one memory of her dad is the help and work he did for her school. Her second one involves an odd incident with a Barbie cake at her eighth birthday.
[23:21] Most people find themselves repeating the exact same mannerisms and sayings that annoyed them most about their parents.
[44:24] Itâs true unconditional love between parent and child and one thing that can help fill the gap when we lose a parent is transferring our love and attention to our children.
Mentioned in This Episode:
Formerly Fat Mom
Jonathan Greene Medium Page
Quotes:
âI think you have the only dad that motorboated a Barbie at an under-10 birthday party.â âItâs not going to be perfect and itâs going to be a hot mess but thatâs called being a parent.â -
Today Jonathan is joined by Alison Donnelly. Alison is a stay-at-home mom living in Brooklyn and is married to one of Jonathanâs long-time friends Dan. Alison talks about her blog Formerly Fat Mom, which chronicled her journey of getting back into shape with a dose of humor and self-deprecation. She and Jonathan also talk about what it is like to lose a parent, give a eulogy, compare end-of-life stories of their parents and any regrets they may still have, the mixed emotions of watching your children grow up and even slip in the best Barbie cake story you may ever hear!
Key Takeaways:
[:31] Jonathanâs guest today is Alison Donnelly. Alison is married to one of Jonathanâs oldest friends, Dan, whom he met and befriended at a tennis and surf club. She is a stay-at-home mom to their 10-year-old son, Thomas.
[1:59] Alisonâs father Aubert passed away in May 2016, when he was 86. Jonathan had a similar loss, as his father passed away 13 years ago at age 67.
[7:28] One of the messages in Jonathanâs writing that touched Alison is: ask your parents all the questions you can about their life, philosophies, and stories, and share as many stories about yourself as you possibly can with your children for them to remember you by.
[8:29] Alison and her husband Dan have been married for 14 years, and together since 1999.
[23:09] Alison shares her experience of working with her dad on his eulogy, and recounts some stories she wishes she shared at his funeral.
[42:09] Although letting the kids go to camp can be tough for the parents, it gives them a sense of identity and opportunity to just be a kid and make new friends and connections.
[47:44] For a lot of people, as their parents age and need more help, the roles of child and parent change and we find ourselves having almost to parent them.
Mentioned in This Episode:
Formerly Fat Mom - blog
Formerly Fat Mom on Facebook
Formerly Fat Mom on Twitter
Formerly Fat Mom on Instagram
Jonathan Greene Medium Page
Quotes:
âWe always knew we wanted to give our kids better than we had.â âYou donât have to wait until your parents are sick to investigate and ask -
Todayâs guest is actor, writer and director Benjamin King, who you may know from his roles on shows such as Liv and Maddie, Greyâs Anatomy and Weeds. Jonathan and Benjamin started as childhood buddies at Camp Taconic before they reconnected on Facebook as adults and new dads. Benjamin now has two girls and shares what it is like to go from a âdad in waitingâ to a real life father, the biggest personal challenges of fatherhood, why having a great partner and spouse makes things infinitely better, and his passion for helping people with Crohnâs and Colitis.
Key Takeaways:
[0:28] Jonathan welcomes todayâs guest, Benjamin King. Benjamin is an actor, writer and director, known for many projects and roles including Liv and Maddie (2013), Grey's Anatomy (2005) and Weeds (2005). He is also one of Jonathanâs oldest friends from camp. He has two girls, ages 10 and 12 and has been married to Laura King since 2004.
[4:22] Benjamin shares the birth story of his oldest daughter, Morgan, and the relationship that developed between himself and his own father.
[13:55] If you arenât a parent and donât understand how itâs easy to mix up names between children and pets, wait until itâs your time and you will!
[14:45] Benjaminâs protective and nurturing side was always there, but kicked up into a high gear once he had children. Both guys grew up with a childhood way more independent and less supervised than children have today, and reminisce about the days when play dates were just kids running around outside with their friends.
[20:07] The goal is to continually do better as a parent and as a son, and do better than your parents did for you, no matter what they were like as a parent.
[26:08] The two most challenging things Benjamin has found about parenting so far: learning how to parent his children differently according to their individual personalities, and letting go of how things should be according to his personal past and preferences.
[39:57] Parenting is made a little easier when you have an understanding and selfless partner, like Benjamin does. He is extremely grateful and appreciative of his wife Laura.
[40:15] Benjamin has to focus extra on health due to Crohn's, an autoimmune illness. He is on a good regimen now, and is passionate about helping others get the education and support they need.
Mentioned in This Episode:
Connecting to Cure Crohnâs and Colitis
IBD Support Foundation
Crohnâs & Colitis Foundation
@SirBenjaminKing Twitter
@SirBenjamin213 Instagram
SirBenjaminKing Facebook
