Episodit

  • God Didn’t Ask Me to Be Nice: Reclaiming Truth, Boundaries, and Peace

    God Didn’t Ask Me to Be Nice: Reclaiming Truth, Boundaries, and Peace

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered
    📌 Episode Summary:

    In today’s episode of Relationship Truth Unfiltered, host LeAnne Parsons, Professional Certified Coach and trauma-informed practitioner on Leslie Vernick’s coaching team, sits down with Vickie a woman whose life was built on saying yes to everyone—until she learned how to say yes to God first.

    From taking on adult responsibilities at age six to becoming everyone’s helper as a wife, mom, and ministry leader, our guest was admired for her generosity and "niceness"—but underneath was exhaustion, resentment, and a quiet spiritual disconnect.

    Through the Moving Beyond People Pleasing program, she discovered the profound difference between being nice and being kind, between serving others and submitting to God's voice.

    She shares how learning to pause, ask God first, and honor the boundaries He helped her set brought incredible freedom—and how the courage to speak up, receive coaching, and be honest with herself changed everything.

    This conversation will inspire any woman who has ever felt burned out, invisible, or afraid to say no.

    🔑 In This Episode You’ll Hear:How people pleasing became part of her identity from childhoodThe moment she realized “niceness” was costing her more than she knewWhy being honest with God and herself was the most loving thing she could doWhat it’s like to speak up for the first time in a safe coaching environmentHow biblical boundaries led to peace, clarity, and confidence in daily lifeWhy “If it’s not a firm yes, it’s a hard no” became a spiritual anchorThe beauty of flexible coaching and sacred sisterhood in a Christ-centered program🧭 Key Quote Highlights:

    “I thought I was honest. But I was saying yes when my heart was screaming no.”

    “I assumed I was serving
 so how could God not be in it?”

    “If I didn’t have a firm yes, the answer was a hard no.”

    “God didn’t ask me to be nice—He asked me to be faithful.”

    📖 Anchor Scripture:

    “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” — Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

    đŸ™‹â€â™€ïž Are You Ready to Move Beyond People Pleasing?

    If this story hit home for you, we invite you to join our Moving Beyond People Pleasing summer coaching experience. It’s flexible. Faith-centered. And filled with powerful tools, real-time support, and a community of courageous women walking toward truth, wholeness, and peace.

    👉 [Link to Learn More + Sign Up]

  • “I Chose to Be Well”: One Woman’s Journey Through Betrayal, Boundaries, and Becoming Whole Again

    “I Chose to Be Well”: One Woman’s Journey Through Betrayal, Boundaries, and Becoming Whole Again

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Have you ever felt like you were losing yourself just to keep the peace? That you were constantly saying “yes” when your heart was crying out “no”? If you’ve ever struggled with people pleasing—especially in the wake of betrayal or in the midst of a painful marriage—this episode is for you.

    In this powerful Coaches Takeover episode, Coach Diana Balla and Coach Susan King are joined by Mara, a courageous woman who vulnerably shares her journey through profound betrayal, emotional trauma, and ultimately, healing and transformation. Mara opens up about how Leslie Vernick & Co.’s “Moving Beyond People Pleasing” flexible group coaching experience helped her reclaim her voice, clarify her identity, and set boundaries that honor her God-given worth. Get ready to be deeply encouraged and inspired.

    Key Takeaways:

    đŸ”č Trauma Opens the Door to Transformation When Mara discovered her husband's decades-long betrayal, including hidden addiction and abuse, it shattered her world. But in the rubble, God met her. Her raw honesty about her trauma response—and how deeply betrayal by a spouse can impact the body and soul—will resonate with anyone who has felt broken by someone they trusted.

    đŸ”č “I Didn’t Know It Was Abuse” Before the discovery, Mara believed she was simply in a dysfunctional marriage. Through Leslie’s book “How to Act Right When Your Spouse Acts Wrong” and the Conquer program, she began to see the patterns of manipulation, control, and gaslighting that had long been present. Her story illustrates how education and support can awaken truth and offer a path to freedom.

    đŸ”č A Safe, Flexible, and Powerful Coaching Experience The Moving Beyond People Pleasing group gave Mara the structure, support, and accountability she needed to begin showing up for herself. With multiple weekly call options, compassionate coaches, meaningful breakout groups, and a loving community, Mara found a space where she could be seen, heard, and healed—even when she had no words to pray.

    đŸ”č From Silence to Strength: Naming Her Needs and Setting Boundaries From rejecting fake flowers she hated to creating three pages of firm, self-honoring boundaries, Mara learned how to stop abandoning herself and start living out her values. One breakthrough moment? Identifying her core fear—being alone—and learning not to let it dictate her choices.

    đŸ”č Healing is Possible, and You Are Worth It With raw honesty, Mara shares how she moved from suicidal despair to spiritual connection, and how God faithfully met her—even in the silence. Her journey is a powerful reminder that healing doesn’t come from trying harder, but from training—and that transformation is possible when you stop people pleasing and start living from your God-given identity.

    ✹ Call to Action: Ready to Break Free from People Pleasing? If you’ve been touched by Mara’s story and are ready to start your own healing journey, we invite you to join us for our 6-week flexible group coaching experience, Moving Beyond People Pleasing. Starting July 14th, this empowering program offers live coaching, a supportive sisterhood, and the tools you need to reclaim your voice and your life.

    👉 Learn more and register today at: www.leslievernick.com/peoplepleasingcourse

    💛 Closing Encouragement: Dear one, you don’t have to keep living in fear, confusion, or exhaustion. You are not alone—and you are not powerless. God sees your pain and wants to meet you there. Healing is hard, but it’s holy work. You are worth the effort. Your story matters. And your life can be rebuilt—beautifully, boldly, and with Christ at the center.

    We’re here with you every step of the way. Keep showing up. Keep training. And always remember: you are precious, you are loved, and you can be well.

    🎧 Listen now and share this episode with someone who needs encouragement today.

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  • Unmasking Insecurity: The Hidden Struggle of People Pleasing

    Unmasking Insecurity: The Hidden Struggle of People Pleasing

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Are you constantly saying “yes” when your heart is screaming “no”?

    If you’ve ever felt like your worth hinges on making everyone around you happy, this episode will speak directly to your heart. Coaches Susan and Diana pull back the curtain on one of the most sneaky and exhausting insecurities many of us carry—people pleasing. It might look like kindness on the outside, but underneath it’s often driven by fear, insecurity, and a longing to feel safe and loved.

    In this honest, grace-filled conversation, they explore why people pleasing starts, how it hides in our habits, and what it takes to break free. You’ll walk away with powerful mindset shifts, biblical wisdom, and a simple but life-changing tool to begin honoring your voice without guilt.

    Key Takeaways from This Episode:

    🎭 People Pleasing Is About Survival, Not Kindness Many of us learned early on that approval equals safety. Saying yes, keeping the peace, and over-functioning became our armor. But as adults, that armor becomes a prison. True kindness includes honesty, boundaries, and self-respect.

    💔 The Cost of People Pleasing Is Your Voice When you constantly put others first to avoid rejection, you risk losing yourself. The result? Exhaustion, resentment, and invisibility. Susan and Diana break down the emotional toll of people pleasing and why it’s not selfish to want rest, space, or to simply say “no.”

    🛑 A Pause Is a Powerful First Step One practical tip? Pause before you say yes. Give yourself permission to check in—am I agreeing from love or fear? That moment of reflection invites the Holy Spirit to guide your response rather than your insecurity.

    📖 Boundaries Are Biblical, Not Selfish Even Jesus said no. He walked away from demands, rested, and stayed rooted in the Father’s will—not public opinion. Saying no doesn’t mean you’re unloving. It means you’re growing into the person God designed you to be—whole, grounded, and free.

    💡 You Don’t Have to Earn Love—You Already Have It At the core of people pleasing is the lie: I have to earn my worth. But Romans 5:8 tells us that Christ loved us at our worst. You don’t have to perform, prove, or please to be worthy. You already are.

    Ready to Break Free from People Pleasing?

    Join our Insecurity Coaching Challenge, starting June 23rd. In just one week, you’ll uncover the roots of insecurity and gain the tools to reclaim your voice, set godly boundaries, and walk in confidence. 👉 Sign up for only $17: www.leslievernick.com/challenge

    You Are Allowed to Take Up Space

    You are not mean for saying no. You’re not broken for needing rest. And you’re not selfish for wanting to live honestly. The journey out of people pleasing isn’t about becoming hardened—it’s about becoming whole. You are already loved, already worthy, and already enough. Let today be your first step toward freedom.

    💬 Share this episode with a fellow recovering people pleaser—you’re not alone.

  • When Pleasing Others Costs Too Much: TC's Story of Capacity, Courage and Clarity

    When Pleasing Others Costs Too Much: TC's Story of Capacity, Courage and Clarity

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered
    🌟 Episode Overview:

    Welcome back to Relationship Truth Unfiltered. In today’s episode, we go beyond the surface and straight into the heart of what it looks like to move from insecurity to identity, from people pleasing to peace. LeAnne sits down with a courageous woman who has walked through divorce, fear, performance pressure—and found her footing again in Christ.

    This episode isn’t polished or perfect. It’s powerful, raw, and real.

    Through this deeply personal and hope-filled conversation, you’ll hear:

    What life looked like before the Moving Beyond Insecurity ChallengeThe surprising realization that even “strong” women can fall into people pleasingThe “aha” moment when boundaries and God’s truth collided in the best wayHow Scripture became an anchor, especially Galatians 1:10 (NLT)What has changed since the challenge—and what’s still being practiced with grace

    You’ll walk away feeling encouraged, grounded, and ready to take your next step toward freedom.

    💬 Key Quotes:

    “Saying yes to others meant I was constantly saying no to myself.” TC

    “God has a plan and purpose for my life—and I can’t fulfill it if I’m giving the best of me to everyone else.” TC

    “Healing is not only available—it’s already begun.” LeAnne Parsons

    🧭 Takeaways:Insecurity and people pleasing can be subtle—and powerful. But they don't have to define you.Boundaries aren’t selfish; they’re sacred. Especially when anchored in truth.Your story can shift. And God will meet you in the middle of the mess.📖 Scripture Anchor:

    Galatians 1:10 (NLT)“Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.”

    đŸ•Šïž Three Words to Describe Her Journey:

    Illuminating. Empowering. Liberating.

    🔗 Resources Mentioned:The Moving Beyond Insecurity Challenge – https://leslievernick.com/challenge🙌 Connect + Share:

    If this conversation spoke to your heart, we’d love for you to share it with a friend or leave a review. It helps more women find their way to truth, wholeness, and healing.

    🧡 You’re not too much. You’re not too late. And you’re never walking alone

  • Insecurity vs. Identity: Breaking Agreement with the Lie

    Insecurity vs. Identity: Breaking Agreement with the Lie

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    In this heart-opening episode, Coach LeAnne Parsons takes us deep into the hidden ways insecurity can shape — and sabotage — our identity in Christ. With wisdom, compassion, and biblical clarity, she gently exposes how fear, shame, and striving disguise themselves as humility or responsibility, keeping women stuck in small stories that God never wrote.

    This episode is a powerful primer for LV and Cos Moving Beyond Insecurity Challenge Week, and it offers a blend of practical insight, Scripture-rich truth, and spiritual invitation to trade fear for freedom — starting now.

    Whether you're confident in your calling or still wrestling with worthiness, this episode will remind you: You are already His. And that changes everything.

    🔑 What You'll Learn:How insecurity quietly rewrites your story without you realizing itThe difference between true humility and spiritualized fearWhat Scripture says about your unshakable identity in ChristCommon lies Christian women believe — and the truth that breaks themWhy "heartwork" is the missing piece in your healing journeyA behind-the-scenes look at the Moving Beyond Insecurity Challenge Week — and how to join📖 Scriptures Mentioned:Genesis 3 – The first appearance of shameIsaiah 43:1 – “I have called you by name; you are mine.”Romans 8 – Our adoption and inheritance in Christ2 Corinthians 12:9 – God’s power in our weaknessEphesians 2:6 – Seated with Christ in heavenly places❀ Quote to Remember:

    “You cannot live out your calling while constantly questioning your worth.” – LeAnne Parsons

    “Heartwork is the intentional process of inviting God to transform what’s going on beneath the surface — your beliefs, your wounds, your identity, your patterns.” –LeAnne Parsons

    “We cannot walk in victory and believe we are failures.” – Beth Moore

    🔗 Links & Resources:đŸ’» Register for the FREE Moving Beyond Insecurity Challenge Week: 👉 leslievernick.com/challenge✍ Want a journaling prompt or two from today’s episode? Join our email list for bonus content.📚 Check out Leslie’s books, coaching info, and Bible-based resources: 👉 leslievernick.com🙏 Leave a Review:

    If this episode spoke to you, would you take a moment to leave a review? It helps more women find encouragement and truth in the middle of their own insecurity battles.

    🎧 Subscribe & Share:

    Don’t miss next week’s Challenge Kickoff episode! Subscribe wherever you listen, and share this episode with a friend who needs a reminder that she’s already enough in Christ.

  • People Pleasing — Why You Do It and How to Stop

    People Pleasing — Why You Do It and How to Stop

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    “People pleasing isn’t love. It’s fear dressed up as kindness.”

    Have you ever gone along to get along? Said yes when you really wanted to say no? Diminished your desires, your boundaries, or even your calling—just to avoid conflict or gain approval? If so, you're not alone.

    In this heartfelt and eye-opening Coaches Takeover episode, Coaches Diana and Susan unpack one of the most common struggles among women: people pleasing. With honesty, biblical insight, and hard-earned wisdom, they dive into the roots of this behavior, share real stories of personal growth, and offer gentle but practical steps to help you stop abandoning yourself—and start showing up with truth, courage, and strength.

    Whether you've been stuck in patterns of self-sacrifice, afraid to speak up, or just feeling exhausted from trying to keep everyone happy, this conversation will meet you with grace and give you tools to walk in freedom.

    People Pleasing Is a Form of Self-Abandonment

    At its core, people pleasing happens when we silence our own needs, wants, or convictions in favor of someone else’s. Whether out of fear of rejection, a desire to keep the peace, or a longing for approval, this behavior often stems from insecurity and a loss of self. Susan shares how people pleasing is about needing something from others (like validation or acceptance) and sacrificing yourself to get it—often without even realizing it.

    You Can’t Heal What You Don’t Notice

    One of the most powerful things you can do is pause and pay attention. Diana and Susan remind us that many women have been conditioned (in families, churches, or culture) to believe that “being nice” means suppressing their true selves. But without self-awareness, people pleasing becomes an automatic pattern that robs us of authenticity and connection. Naming it is the first step to breaking free.

    Personal Stories Reveal the Cost of People Pleasing

    Diana vulnerably shares moments in her life where fear of disappointing others led to missed opportunities—including a professional invitation she turned down simply because she didn’t ask for what she needed. Susan reflects on how being trained as a therapist to be a “blank slate” magnified her already strong pattern of disappearing for others. Their stories highlight how people pleasing may seem noble—but often leads to regret and invisibility.

    Reclaiming Your Voice Takes Practice—and Courage

    Breaking free from people pleasing means learning to notice your own preferences, to ask for what you need, and to tolerate the discomfort of not pleasing everyone. This isn’t selfish—it’s sacred. As Susan and Diana point out, many women have never developed a strong sense of self, or it’s been erased by years of criticism or control. Rebuilding it is part of healing, and it takes time, support, and practice.

    Your Purpose Matters—Don’t Let Fear Steal It

    People pleasing often leads to lost opportunities, diminished confidence, and emotional exhaustion. But God created you with purpose and worth—and you don’t have to keep hiding or hustling to prove yourself. With the right tools and support, you can step into truth, draw healthy boundaries, and become the strong, faithful woman God called you to be.

  • How Insecurity Shows Up in Your Life (and What to Do About It)

    How Insecurity Shows Up in Your Life (and What to Do About It)

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    “You’re not alone, you’re not crazy—and with God’s help, you can build confidence and walk in truth.”

    Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough? Like you didn’t belong or couldn't trust your own decisions? Maybe you’ve wrestled with anxiety before speaking up, or feared being rejected in relationships. If so, you’re not alone. In this special “Coaches Takeover” episode, Coaches Susan and Diana get real about a struggle that touches every woman at some point: insecurity.

    They peel back the layers to explore what insecurity really is, how it forms, how it shows up in everyday life—from career and finances to relationships and social settings—and how to move forward with confidence, clarity, and faith. With biblical insight, relatable stories, and practical tools, this episode will help you identify hidden roots of insecurity and take the first step toward freedom.

    Understanding the Root of Insecurity

    Insecurity isn’t just a feeling—it’s often a long-standing belief shaped by past wounds, trauma, criticism, or comparison. Susan and Diana explain how insecurity is usually built on perception rather than truth, and how that perception becomes a lens that affects everything from your self-worth to your ability to make decisions.

    Types of Insecurity—and Where You Might See Yourself

    From public speaking to parenting, marriage to money, insecurity shows up in many forms: personal, relational, social, professional, and financial. The coaches share vulnerable stories from their own lives (yes, even beach towel choices and Ph.D. paths!) to illustrate how insecurity can limit growth and paralyze action.

    The Body Keeps the Score

    Insecurity doesn’t just stay in your head. It shows up in your body—through anxiety, overthinking, or even chronic stress. You’ll learn how physical dysregulation can keep you stuck and how being curious (not critical) about your reactions can be a powerful path to healing.

    Shifting from Perfectionism to Purpose

    When insecurity drives perfectionism, it keeps you focused on your flaws instead of your impact. The coaches offer a mindset shift: let go of the need to be perfect and embrace being human. Showing up, even imperfectly, is powerful—especially when you focus on helping others rather than proving yourself.

    From Shame to Strength: A Biblical Perspective

    Going all the way back to Genesis, we see insecurity take root when we begin to question who we are and who God is. Susan and Diana remind us of the enemy’s tactics and encourage us to put on the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10–12), standing firm in truth and identity as beloved daughters of the King.

    You Are Not Alone

    Friend, insecurity may whisper that you’re not enough—but the truth is, you are deeply loved, uniquely created, and equipped by God for purpose. You don’t need to stay stuck in fear. With His help, you can show up strong, stand in your worth, and walk in freedom.

    We’re so glad you’re here.

    If this episode encouraged you, would you share it with a friend or leave a review? You never know who might need the hope and healing God has for them through your simple act of sharing.

    Until next time, keep leaning into courage, wisdom, and the One who loves you most.

  • When Trauma Shows Up in Parenting: One Woman’s Question, Many Women’s Reality

    When Trauma Shows Up in Parenting: One Woman’s Question, Many Women’s Reality

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    In this tender episode of Unfiltered Truth, Coach LeAnne shares one brave woman’s deeply vulnerable question about parenting in the wake of trauma—and the grace-filled truth we all need to hear. If you’ve ever reacted in anger and wondered, “What’s wrong with me?”—you’re not alone. Through a trauma-informed, Christ-centered lens, LeAnne explores how past wounds shape present responses and offers practical tools to begin breaking reactive cycles with compassion, courage, and truth.

    You’ll learn:

    Why trauma often shows up in parentingHow to pause before reactingWhat it means to name your triggersHow to repair ruptures and reset relationshipsWhere God’s grace meets us in our weakness

    Featured Scripture:

    2 Timothy 1:7Psalm 4:4Psalm 139:23–24Hebrews 12:12 Corinthians 12:9

    Resources Mentioned: Read the full blog post: When Trauma Shows Up in Parenting → https://leslievernick.com/blog/understanding-and-breaking-the-cycle-of-trauma-responses-in-parenting/

    Learn more about Trust-Based Relational InterventionÂź (TBRI): - https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/trust-based-relational-intervention-tbri-works-leanne/

    Want to coach with LeAnne or the team? Learn more about our community. Visit: https://leslievernick.com/coaching/

    Subscribe to Relationship Truth Unfiltered so you never miss an episode!

  • Our Stories, Our Why

    Our Stories, Our Why

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    In this deeply personal and powerful kickoff to the Coaches Takeover Series on Relationship Truth: Unfiltered, join Certified Coaches LeAnne Parsons and Diana Bala as they pull back the curtain on their personal stories of people-pleasing, performance, and purpose—and how God has faithfully redeemed it all.

    With warmth, honesty, and Christ-centered wisdom, LeAnne and Diana share how their journeys of healing led them to coaching—and why they are passionate about walking alongside women in emotionally destructive relationships today.

    This episode will help you feel seen, known, and invited into your own transformation. You’ll discover that you don’t have to disappear to keep the peace, and you don’t have to perform to be loved.

    If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe it’s me,” or “Is it selfish to say no?”—this episode is for you.

    What You'll Hear in This Episode:Personal stories of people-pleasing and the protective roles it playsMoments of transformation that shifted everythingWhy coaching is a sacred and powerful tool in healing journeysHow Scripture anchors the work of both coachesReal, practical first steps to move beyond fear-based approval-seekingEncouragement that you are not too messy for God’s love—or His purpose Anchor Scripture:

    “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”— Galatians 1:10 (NLT)

    Quotable Moments:

    “You don’t have to disappear to keep the peace.” – LeAnne “People-pleasing wasn’t my personality—it was my protection.” – LeAnne “It’s maturity, not selfishness, to know who God made you to be.” – Diana “Your ‘no’ can be holy when it honors your God-given priorities.” – Diana

    Ready for More?

    Learn more about coaching with our team:www.leslievernick.com/coaching

    Subscribe to Relationship Truth: Unfiltered so you don’t miss what’s next! Share this episode with a friend who needs encouragement and truth today. Leave a review—it helps others find the same support and strength.

    Closing Prayer Highlight:

    “You’re not alone. You’re not crazy. And with God’s help, you can live in truth, walk in CORE strength, and reclaim your voice.” – LeAnne

    Sneak Peek:

    Stay tuned for upcoming episodes featuring powerful client stories of transformation and live Q&A sessions with your coaches. Real questions, real answers, rooted in real hope.

  • A Fresh Voice, A Familiar Mission: Welcoming Our Coaches Takeover

    A Fresh Voice, A Familiar Mission: Welcoming Our Coaches Takeover

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    In this special episode, LeAnne Parsons (PCC, TBRI Practitioner, and coach on Leslie Vernick’s team) shares an exciting update. With Leslie’s full blessing and invitation, the coaching team is stepping in to bring a new Coaches Takeover Series to the podcast!

    You’ll hear encouragement, real transformation stories, and coaching insights that align perfectly with the biblical foundation and trauma-informed care this podcast is known for.

    Expect practical tools, Christ-centered truth, and deep reminders that your healing matters and your voice is not too much.

    Highlights:

    Why Leslie invited her coaching team to take the micWhat’s ahead in the new Coaches Takeover SeriesWhy this message of healing, boundaries, and truth matters more than everA personal encouragement from LeAnne

    Galatians 1:10 (NLT) Learn more: www.leslievernick.com/coaching Don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review!

  • From Lost to Found: Reclaiming Your Voice, Identity & Faith in Destructive Relationships

    From Lost to Found: Reclaiming Your Voice, Identity & Faith in Destructive Relationships

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Have you ever felt like you've lost yourself trying to make a relationship work?You go through the motions, trying to be the "good wife," the "submissive woman," the "faithful helper"—but deep inside, something feels off. You’re exhausted, resentful, and unsure how you even got here. In this episode of Relationship Truth: Unfiltered, Leslie welcomes psychotherapist and leadership coach Michelle Moffitt for a candid conversation about what it means to wake up, reclaim your voice, and start honoring the woman God created you to be.

    Michelle shares her personal journey of trauma, toxic theology, and eventually rediscovering her worth and agency through therapy, self-awareness, boundaries, and faith. You’ll learn how to stop playing small, listen to your intuition, and begin transforming not only your relationships—but your life.

    👉 Learn more about Michelle and her work at www.michellemoffitt.com

    Key Takeaways:

    💔 The Cost of Losing Yourself for the Sake of “We”Michelle opens up about how early trauma and religious pressure led her to sacrifice her identity in order to find belonging. Many women will relate to that pull to be the perfect wife or partner—only to realize they’ve abandoned themselves in the process. Leslie and Michelle expose the lies women are told in church and culture, and the real cost of losing your authentic self.

    🧠 Rebuilding Trust in Your Intuition and JudgmentOne of the deepest wounds in destructive relationships is losing the ability to trust your own gut. Michelle introduces the SPACE tool (Stop, Present, Ask, Change, Express) to help you slow down and become more conscious of the beliefs that are driving your decisions. You'll learn how to retrain your brain to hear God’s voice and your own again.

    🛑 Boundaries Aren’t Mean—They’re HolyIf you’ve been over-functioning or enabling dysfunction for years, stepping into new boundaries can feel “mean.” Michelle shares practical examples and scripts that helped her draw lines without shame or cruelty—and how those boundaries started to shift the entire relationship dynamic, even when it wasn’t received well.

    đŸ§© The Power of the Enneagram in HealingUnderstanding your Enneagram type can be a powerful tool for healing and growth—especially if you’ve been stuck in people-pleasing patterns or don’t even know what you like anymore. Michelle explains how the Enneagram goes deeper than personality tests to reveal hidden motives, helping you understand not only yourself, but others, with compassion and clarity.

    đŸ—Łïž Reclaiming Your Voice—and Why It Changes EverythingUsing your voice isn’t just about confrontation; it’s about becoming who God made you to be. Michelle and Leslie talk about the discomfort of change, the fear of being alone, and the beauty of showing up in the world as your full self. If you've ever asked, “What’s wrong with me?”—this episode will help you ask instead, “What’s right with me that I’ve buried for too long?”

    đŸŒ± Ready to Begin Your Own Healing Journey?If you’re feeling stuck, silenced, or unsure of your next step, you don’t have to walk alone. Leslie’s Conquer program is designed to help Christian women break free from destructive relationships and find clarity, confidence, and courage—grounded in truth and God’s love.👉 Learn more at www.leslievernick.com/conquer

    💛 Closing Encouragement:Sister, you are not selfish for wanting to be whole. God didn’t create you to be a shadow of someone else—He created you to reflect His image. As you reclaim your voice, your boundaries, and your purpose, remember: You are not alone. You are not crazy. And with God's guidance, you can do this. Step by step. One brave decision at a time.

  • Nick Stumbo on Breaking the Silence: The Hidden Impact of Porn on Christian Marriages

    Nick Stumbo on Breaking the Silence: The Hidden Impact of Porn on Christian Marriages

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    What do you do when trust is shattered, but no one around you seems to take your pain seriously?In today’s deeply honest and hope-filled episode, Leslie sits down with Nick Stumbo, former pastor and Executive Director of Pure Desire Ministries, who opens up about his personal battle with pornography—and the profound impact it had on his wife, his marriage, and his ministry. Nick's story isn’t just one of addiction—it's about healing, honesty, and hope when everything seems lost.

    Together, Leslie and Nick dismantle toxic messaging that pressures wives to “just forgive” or “have more sex,” and instead offer a biblical and brain-based path toward real recovery—one that honors both the betrayed and the struggler.

    If you or someone you love is silently suffering in a marriage affected by pornography, this episode will remind you: You’re not alone, and your healing matters.

    🔑 Key Takeaways:1. Pornography Is Not Just a “Men’s Issue”—It’s a People Problem

    Nick shares eye-opening statistics from Pure Desire’s recent Barna study, showing that over half of practicing Christians admit to viewing pornography, including 40% of Christian women. This isn’t about pointing fingers—it’s about lifting the shame and creating real solutions.

    “Porn is not a minor issue. It’s undermining the heartbeat of our marriages and families.”

    2. Real Healing Begins When the Struggler Takes Full Ownership

    For 10 years, Nick’s wife forgave his repeated confessions. But healing didn’t begin until Nick recognized the impact of his actions on her heart. It wasn’t enough to try harder—he had to go deeper.

    “Her pain wasn’t the problem. My choices were. When I stopped minimizing her hurt and started listening, everything changed.”

    3. Rebuilding Trust Requires Consistent Action, Not Just Apologies

    Nick offers practical examples of what rebuilding trust looked like in his marriage: weekly check-ins, recovery groups, full honesty, and showing—not just saying—change. He emphasizes that wives need to see patterns of safety, not just hear promises.

    “Trust is rebuilt when words and actions align over time—not when you demand forgiveness before you’ve earned it.”

    4. Churches Must Stop Prioritizing Reconciliation Over Healing

    Leslie and Nick both challenge churches that urge women to reconcile prematurely, while ignoring their trauma. Healing isn’t about keeping the marriage together at any cost—it’s about helping both people get healthy, whether or not the marriage survives.

    “The greatest hope for a reconciled marriage is two healing people—not one healing while the other continues to harm.”

    5. Community Is Essential—For Both the Betrayed and the Struggler

    Nick explains how Pure Desire’s gender-specific recovery groups changed everything for both him and his wife. In community, they found tools, support, and the courage to stop hiding.

    “You cannot heal in isolation. We were never meant to carry this alone.”

    💌 A Personal Invitation

    If you're feeling exhausted, stuck, or unsure if your marriage can survive the devastation of pornography, there is a path forward. Whether you're the one who struggles—or the one who’s been wounded—your healing matters.

    👉 Learn more about Pure Desire Ministries and find recovery resources here: puredesire.org👉 Looking for support for destructive or emotionally abusive relationships? Explore Leslie’s programs here: leslievernick.com

    💖 Closing Encouragement

    Friend, if you're hanging on by a thread, hear this: God sees your pain. He hears your cries. And He cares deeply about your healing.You don’t have to keep doing the same destructive dance. Whether your spouse is ready or not, you can start getting healthy today.There is hope. There is help. And there is freedom—one courageous step at a time.

  • I Didn’t Know I Was in an Abusive Marriage with Naghmeh Panahi

    I Didn’t Know I Was in an Abusive Marriage with Naghmeh Panahi

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    What if the marriage you fought to save was the very thing destroying you?

    In today’s raw and courageous episode, Leslie sits down with Naghmeh Panahi, a woman many first heard about when she passionately advocated for the release of her husband, Pastor Saeed Abedini, imprisoned in Iran for his Christian faith. But behind the public story of courage and faith, Naghmeh was quietly suffering in a destructive and abusive marriage.

    Naghmeh shares for the first time some of the hidden truths behind her story—how culture, Christian teaching, trauma bonding, and spiritual confusion kept her trapped in abuse, and how God gently led her out of the rubble and into healing. Her story is not just about abuse; it’s about redemption, truth, and discovering her worth as a cherished daughter of God.

    Whether you’ve questioned if your marriage is abusive, struggled to reconcile your faith with your suffering, or wondered if healing is even possible—this episode is for you.

    💡 Key Takeaways from Today’s Episode

    🔍 Abuse Isn’t Always Obvious—But Your Body KnowsEven after experiencing physical violence, Naghmeh didn’t initially see herself as an abuse victim. Cultural and Christian teachings told her to be submissive, to not trust her feelings. But she shares how her body, her spirit, and God’s truth began revealing what her mind had been trained to ignore.

    đŸš© Early Red Flags and Trauma BondingFrom the beginning, Saeed criticized her appearance, isolated her from her family, and crossed sexual boundaries during their courtship. These moments formed deep trauma bonds that left her feeling trapped. Naghmeh bravely names the molestation she experienced and the misplaced shame that kept her silent.

    🛑 When Faith Is Twisted to Justify OppressionRaised in Middle Eastern and conservative Christian cultures, Naghmeh was taught to value the institution of marriage over her personal safety. But she powerfully unpacks how Jesus does not call us property—He lifts, honors, and protects women. She reminds us that the God of the Bible hates the oppression of women, not those who break free from it.

    💔 From Rubble to Revival—God RebuildsNaghmeh shares how, after her story went public, she endured severe backlash from the Christian community—but also found a deeper intimacy with God in the wilderness. Through tears, silence, and surrender, God slowly rebuilt her life, her joy, and her calling.

    🌍 God Is Using Her—and He Can Use You TooNow leading a thriving ministry reaching Iran, Afghanistan, and beyond, Naghmeh testifies that God still uses broken women. Her story proves that divorce is not disqualification—and that freedom leads to fruitfulness. Her vibrant joy and spiritual strength are evidence of God’s redemptive power.

    💌 Are You Ready to Step Out of the Rubble?

    If Naghmeh’s story resonated with you, know this: You are not damaged goods. It’s not too late. You can get out. You can heal. You can rebuild.

    🙏 Closing Encouragement

    Sister, God never asked you to sacrifice your soul to save a marriage. He sees your pain. He honors your tears. And He’s not done with your story. Like Naghmeh, you may feel broken right now—but broken is not the end. It’s the beginning of something sacred, strong, and free.

    Let God rebuild the ruins. Let Him plant deep joy where sorrow once lived. You are His beloved daughter—and your healing brings Him glory.

    You are not alone.

  • Healing After Sexual Abuse: A Powerful Conversation with Tabitha Westbrook

    Healing After Sexual Abuse: A Powerful Conversation with Tabitha Westbrook

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Have you ever wondered if healing is truly possible after the deepest kind of betrayal?

    Maybe you’ve been carrying the weight of shame, confusion, or silence for years. Or maybe someone you love is walking that road and you don’t know how to help. In this honest and hope-filled episode, Leslie is joined by Tabitha Westbrook, licensed therapist, abuse recovery expert, and survivor, for one of the most vulnerable conversations we’ve had yet.

    Tabitha courageously shares parts of her own story of sexual abuse—both in childhood and in marriage—and offers profound insight into what real healing looks like. Together, Leslie and Tabitha explore how trauma impacts our bodies, our faith, our sexuality, and our relationships—and how God gently invites us toward wholeness.

    Whether you’re walking through this journey yourself or supporting someone who is, you’ll leave this episode with truth, compassion, and a renewed sense of hope.

    💡 Key Takeaways from This Episode:

    💔 Healing Isn’t a Straight Line—It’s a Sacred JourneyTabitha shares that healing happens in layers. Just when you think you're “done,” God may bring something new to the surface—not to punish you, but to lovingly bring it into the light. There is no shame in needing more healing.

    đŸ–ïž Your Body Wasn’t the Problem—Abuse WasFor survivors, it’s common to disconnect from the body or view it as broken. Tabitha helps us reframe that: Your body isn’t your enemy. Gentle, safe touch—even starting with placing your hand over your heart—can begin the work of restoring trust and safety in your own skin.

    💬 The Church Needs to Stop Being SilentToo often, women go to their pastors first—and are met with harmful advice or spiritual platitudes. Tabitha urges churches to get trauma-informed, stop shaming survivors, and become places of real healing, not deeper harm.

    đŸ•Šïž Yes, We’re Talking About Sexuality—With GraceFrom reclaiming sexual health to navigating masturbation, orgasm, and pleasure after trauma, Tabitha speaks boldly and biblically about the realities many Christian women face. God designed sexuality to be good—and healing in this area is possible.

    📘 New Resource: Body & Soul, Healed & Whole by Tabitha Westbrook

    We’re thrilled to celebrate the release of Tabitha’s brand-new book, Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control, launching April 1, 2025.

    This groundbreaking resource offers a biblically grounded, trauma-informed path to reclaiming your body and restoring your sexuality in a way that honors God and brings healing. Tabitha gently invites readers into truth, safety, and wholeness—no matter how broken or disconnected they feel.

    👉 Order the book here:Tyndale HouseAmazon

    đŸ–Šïž Don’t miss the companion workbook, launching the same day, to help you go deeper in your healing journey.

    If this episode spoke to your heart, don’t walk this path alone. Leslie’s Conquer Membership community is a safe, faith-based space for women healing from destructive relationships. Inside, you’ll find support, coaching, and biblical tools to help you walk in truth and strength.

    👉 Learn more and join the waitlist here: www.leslievernick.com

    🌟 Closing Encouragement

    Friend, if your story includes abuse, shame, or silence—please know this: you are not alone, and you are not beyond healing. God sees you. He is not afraid of your wounds. There is no part of your story too dark for His light, and no part of your heart too broken for His love.

    Take the next step. Speak the truth. Healing is possible—one brave choice at a time.

  • When Loving Him Hurts: Navigating Neurodivergence, Abuse, and Ministry Expectations

    When Loving Him Hurts: Navigating Neurodivergence, Abuse, and Ministry Expectations

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered
    Is It Neurodivergence
 or Abuse? One Woman’s Journey to Truth and Freedom

    What do you do when the man you married is beloved by everyone, but you’re falling apart behind closed doors? When he’s neurodivergent—and you want to be compassionate—but you’re the one carrying the entire weight of the marriage, ministry, and motherhood?

    In this deeply moving episode of Relationship Truth: Unfiltered, Leslie sits down with life coach, neurodiversity advocate, and former missionary Jenilee Goodwin. Jenilee courageously shares her story of being in a 23-year emotionally destructive marriage while also navigating the challenges of ministry, chronic illness, and parenting neurodivergent children.

    Her journey—from burnout and confusion to clarity and empowerment—will resonate with every woman who’s ever asked: Is it really that bad
 or am I just not trying hard enough?

    With honesty, wisdom, and deep spiritual insight, Jenilee walks us through the complexities of differentiating neurodivergent limitations from emotionally abusive behavior, and how she found the strength to obey God—even when it meant letting go of everything she’d built.

    Key Takeaways1. Neurodivergence vs. Destructive Behavior: How to Discern the Difference

    Jenilee explains how difficult it was to separate her husband’s ADHD and possible autism from his emotionally abusive behaviors. The turning point? Realizing that neurodivergence doesn’t excuse a lack of empathy, unwillingness to change, or repeated disregard for her well-being. Diagnosis is not a license for disrespect.

    2. When Ministry Expectations Keep You Stuck

    As a pastor’s wife and missionary, Jenilee felt enormous pressure to keep up appearances. But when her health began to deteriorate and her husband refused to share the load, she had to make a painful decision: obey the institutional church
 or obey God’s whisper to “stop.”

    3. You Are Not His Body and Brain

    Jenilee describes the crushing emotional and mental labor she carried for her husband—being his memory, his planner, his spiritual leader—until she said no more. When she stopped overfunctioning, things crumbled
 but clarity and healing finally began.

    4. Obedience to God Sometimes Looks Like Letting Go

    The lie that godly women must sacrifice themselves no matter what is one that keeps many stuck in harmful marriages. Jenilee shares how stepping into obedience—choosing truth over appearances—led to both heartbreak and unexpected joy.

    5. Your Body Keeps the Score—But God Holds the Pen

    From MS and fibromyalgia to chronic fatigue, Jenilee’s body bore the cost of the emotional toll she carried for years. But after she stopped rescuing her husband and started caring for herself, healing began—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

    Closing Encouragement

    Sister, you are not selfish for needing rest. You are not ungodly for drawing boundaries. You are not breaking your marriage—you are breaking free from patterns that are breaking you. Obedience to God may feel like a fire, but on the other side is freedom, clarity, and healing.

    Don’t wait until your body forces you to stop. Listen to that still, small voice. God is calling you into truth—and into life.

    You can do this. We’re walking with you.

  • Money, Marriage & Moving Forward: A Financial Guide for Women Facing Divorce with Rhonda Noordyk

    Money, Marriage & Moving Forward: A Financial Guide for Women Facing Divorce with Rhonda Noordyk

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Divorce is never the goal, but sometimes it’s the only solution to an abusive, destructive marriage. Yet, for many Christian women, the fear of financial ruin keeps them stuck in unhealthy relationships. Today, we’re tackling that fear head-on with financial expert Rhonda Noordyk, founder of the Women’s Financial Wellness Center and host of the podcast Disrupting Divorce Conversations for Women.

    Rhonda has dedicated her career to helping women navigate the financial complexities of divorce with confidence and clarity. In this episode, she shares practical strategies for financial empowerment, ways to uncover hidden assets, and how to build a strong support team so that no woman has to walk this journey alone. If you've ever felt trapped by financial insecurity or overwhelmed by the thought of handling money on your own, this conversation is for you.

    Key Takeaways

    Divorce Isn’t the First Choice, But Sometimes It’s the Best ChoiceMany women hesitate to leave abusive or destructive marriages due to religious or cultural conditioning. Rhonda and Leslie discuss why staying informed about your options is not promoting divorce but rather promoting wisdom and safety.

    Building a Strong Financial Foundation Starts with AwarenessWhether you're contemplating divorce or just wanting to be more financially literate, knowing where your money is and how it works is crucial. Rhonda shares her Bridge Method, helping women breathe, build a financial team, and gather critical financial documents before making any decisions.

    Common Financial Fears and How to Overcome ThemFear of being destitute, of never being able to own a home, or of not being able to provide for children keeps many women feeling stuck. Rhonda walks us through the knowledge-experience-confidence formula that helps women step into financial empowerment.

    Practical Steps to Uncover Financial InformationRhonda shares insider strategies, including checking credit reports, IRS transcripts, and even using USPS informed delivery, to help women piece together their financial picture—even when their spouse has kept them in the dark.

    You Don’t Have to Do This AloneHaving a trusted support system is key. If you don’t know where to start, find a financial expert, a supportive friend, or even a private investigator if necessary. Rhonda’s resources make it easier to take those first steps toward financial security.

    Resources & Next StepsListen to Rhonda's podcast Disrupting Divorce Conversations for WomenDownload Rhonda’s free resource: 6 Ways to Get a Fair Divorce Settlement – wfwcdivorce.comExplore Leslie’s coaching programs and community for faith-based support – leslievernick.comFinal Encouragement

    If you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember this: You don’t have to figure it all out today. Just take one small step toward educating yourself and preparing for your future. God will guide your path, one decision at a time. You are not alone, and you are stronger than you think.

  • The Nicest Liar You'll Ever Meet

    The Nicest Liar You'll Ever Meet

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    What happens when the person you trust most turns out to be a stranger behind closed doors? Many of us go into marriage believing we’ve found a godly partner, only to discover deception, manipulation, and an unraveling reality we never saw coming. In this powerful episode of Relationship Truth Unfiltered, Julie Sedenko sits down with Isla, a woman whose marriage began with hidden debts, constant lies, and a suffocating sense of tension. After years of heartache, separation, and a journey toward personal transformation, she and her husband now walk a different path—one built on truth, respect, and a deeper understanding of God's role in their lives.

    If you’ve ever felt trapped in a relationship where words don’t match actions, where confusion and self-doubt creep in, this episode will encourage and empower you with the wisdom, faith, and tools to step into truth.

    Key Takeaways

    1. The Slow Realization of DeceptionIsla’s story began with excitement and hope—she believed she had chosen wisely. But from her wedding night onward, subtle red flags began to emerge: small acts of indifference, shifting moods, and later, outright lies. She learned that deception doesn’t always come with blatant betrayal; sometimes, it’s the quiet erosion of trust, the feeling that something is always just slightly off. If you feel unsettled in your relationship but can’t pinpoint why, it’s worth paying attention.

    2. The Power of Denial and OvercompensatingFor years, Isla compensated for her husband's irresponsibility, picking up the slack and trying harder to make things work. She assumed his agreement with her concerns meant he would change, but true transformation requires action, not just words. Recognizing the difference between passive compliance and real accountability was key in her healing journey.

    3. The Breaking Point: When You Can’t Walk Through the DoorSitting in her car, unable to enter her own home, Isla hit a moment of undeniable truth—her marriage was crushing her spirit. It wasn’t until she stepped back, created boundaries, and sought wisdom that she began to reclaim her life. Sometimes, rock bottom is the birthplace of transformation.

    4. Healing Through Faith, Boundaries, and CommunityIsla's faith played a crucial role in her journey. She turned to Proverbs for wisdom, joined Conquer, and found a community of women who understood her struggle. Through this, she discovered that mutual, safe, and reciprocal relationships are God’s design—not a life of walking on eggshells. Healing required her to hold the relationship loosely, allowing her husband to take responsibility for his own growth.

    5. Rebuilding with Wisdom and CautionAfter three years of separation, her husband had to prove his change—not with words, but with actions. Weekly accountability groups, personal counseling, and a renewed commitment to truth paved the way for reconciliation. Their marriage today looks nothing like before—marked by independent wholeness, clear financial separation, and intentional rebuilding. It’s not about returning to the old marriage; it’s about creating something new.

    A Personal Invitation

    If Isla’s story resonates with you, you don’t have to navigate this alone. Conquer is a transformative support community designed for women facing destructive relationships. You’ll find biblical wisdom, practical tools, and the support of women who truly understand. Learn more and join the waitlist at leslievernick.com/conquersignup.

    Closing Encouragement

    If you’re sitting in your car, afraid to walk inside, know this: God sees you. You are precious in His sight, and you deserve a life built on truth, respect, and mutual love. Don’t be afraid to take the next right step—one step at a time, one boundary at a time. You are not alone, and with God’s guidance, healing and clarity are possible.

  • Power, Abuse, and the Church: Exposing the Truth with Dr. Diane Langberg

    Power, Abuse, and the Church: Exposing the Truth with Dr. Diane Langberg

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    When the Church Harms Instead of Heals: A Conversation with Dr. Diane Langberg

    Does the church always protect the vulnerable? Unfortunately, the answer is no. Too often, church leaders and institutions protect their own reputation, power, and influence instead of the wounded and abused. This episode is a crucial conversation with world-renowned trauma expert Dr. Diane Langberg, who has spent over five decades counseling survivors of abuse and working to bring truth and light into the darkest places within the church.

    In this episode, Leslie Vernick and Dr. Langberg discuss how churches can—and must—do better. They expose the dangerous ways churches enable abuse, misuse power, and silence victims in the name of God. If you've ever felt unheard, dismissed, or spiritually manipulated by those in leadership, this conversation will offer both validation and hope.

    Key Takeaways:

    1. Why Churches Struggle to See and Address AbuseThe church has been slow to acknowledge abuse within its walls. Too often, the institution is prioritized over the people. Jesus called leaders to "feed my sheep," yet many churches protect the system instead. Abuse survivors need churches that reflect Christ’s heart, not just uphold doctrine.

    2. The Harmful Messages Women Hear About Abuse and MarriageMany women are told that preserving marriage at all costs is God’s will, even at the expense of their physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. But God hates sin more than divorce. Jesus himself walked away from people who refused truth, and women are not called to stay in destructive relationships to honor God.

    3. The Self-Deception of Abusive Church LeadersAbusive pastors and leaders often twist Scripture to justify their actions. They protect their reputations and minimize their sins, deceiving not only others but themselves. True repentance requires exposure and accountability, not secrecy and cover-ups.

    4. How to Create Safer Churches for Abuse SurvivorsChurches must shift their focus from building large institutions to becoming places that reflect Christ’s love and justice. This means listening to survivors, seeking expert training, and prioritizing character over charisma in leadership.

    5. God's Heart for the WoundedFor those who have been harmed by their church, Dr. Langberg offers a powerful reminder: God sees, weeps, and hates the evil done in His name. He does not ask you to stay in an abusive situation. He is for you, not against you.

    Resources and Next Steps:Dr. Diane Langberg’s book: When the Church Harms God's PeopleDr. Diane Langberg's website: www.dianelangberg.comLeslie Vernick’s resources for abuse survivors: www.leslievernick.comNeed support? Join our private community for women seeking healing and guidance. Final Encouragement

    If you've been hurt by the church, know this: God is not like the leaders who failed you. He sees you, loves you, and wants you to walk in freedom. Your voice matters, and healing is possible.

    Thank you for listening to Relationship Truth Unfiltered. Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.

  • Acceptance: Facing Hard Truths Without Giving Up Hope

    Acceptance: Facing Hard Truths Without Giving Up Hope

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    Have you ever found yourself stuck in a cycle of hoping things will change, only to be disappointed over and over again? Maybe you’re in a destructive marriage, and deep down, you know the truth... but accepting it feels impossible.

    In this episode, Leslie Vernick and Julie Sedenko dive into what true acceptance looks like, especially for women in difficult relationships. But here’s the key: Acceptance doesn’t mean giving up. It doesn’t mean resigning yourself to misery. Instead, it’s about facing the truth so that you can take back your power and choose your next steps wisely.

    If you’re exhausted from trying to change someone who refuses to change, this episode will help you shift your mindset and start taking care of yourself because you are worth it.

    Key Takeaways:1. Healthy People Live in the TruthDenying reality doesn’t change it, it only keeps you stuck.Accepting a hard truth doesn’t mean you have to like it, but it does mean you can begin to move forward.Resisting reality drains your energy. Facing it, even when it hurts, is the first step to healing and change.2. Acceptance is Empowering, Not DefeatingAccepting the truth about your marriage doesn’t mean it will never change, but it does mean you stop relying on "hopium", the false hope that if you just try harder, he’ll be different.When you accept reality, you regain your power by asking: “What are my choices now?”Acceptance leads to action. You can start making plans for your well-being, rather than waiting for someone else to change.3. You Have Choices, Even When It Feels Like You Don’tIf your husband refuses to change, you can choose how you will respond.Your choices might include setting firmer boundaries, building financial independence, finding emotional support, or even considering separation.Instead of waiting for someone else to rescue you, step into the role God has given you as the steward of your own life.4. Stop Living Like a Doormat—Set Healthy BoundariesFeeling like a doormat? That’s a sign you need better boundaries.Being kind does not mean letting people take advantage of you.When you start saying “no,” pay attention to how people respond. Do they respect your boundaries, or do they punish you for them? That tells you a lot about the relationship.5. Taking Responsibility for Your Own Well-BeingIf your needs aren’t being met in your marriage, you don’t have to stay stuck in resentment. Instead, you can take steps to meet them in other ways.Stop waiting for your husband to make you feel valued, loved, or celebrated. Celebrate yourself.God calls us to steward our lives wisely. Taking care of yourself is not selfish, it’s responsible.A Personal Invitation:

    Are you struggling to accept a painful truth in your marriage? You don’t have to go through this alone. Ready to take action and grow stronger? Walking in CORE Strength is a coaching program designed to help you build confidence, set boundaries, and reclaim your life. Learn more and join us here.

    Final Encouragement:

    Acceptance is hard, but it’s also the doorway to freedom. When you stop fighting the truth, you can start making choices that bring peace, strength, and healing into your life. You are not alone, and God will give you the courage to take the next step.

    đŸ”č Follow the podcast so you never miss an episode!đŸ”č Leave a review! Your words encourage other women to find hope and truth.

  • Pastor's Wife: Called or Confined?

    Pastor's Wife: Called or Confined?

    · Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

    RESOURCES:Join Walking in Core Strength Today!Beth Allison Barr's website"Becoming the Pastor's Wife" by Beth Allison BarrWhat does it mean to be a pastor’s wife? Is it a God-ordained role, or has it been shaped by culture? And how do women in ministry or marriage find freedom when their identity feels crushed under the weight of unrealistic expectations?

    In this powerful and eye-opening episode, Leslie sits down with Dr. Beth Allison Barr, a medieval historian, pastor’s wife, and author of The Making of Biblical Womanhood and Becoming the Pastor’s Wife: How Marriage Replaced Ordination as Women’s Paths to Ministry. Together, they uncover the hidden history of women in the church, the pressures placed on pastor’s wives, and the rise of complementarian theology that has harmed both women and men. Beth also shares practical wisdom for women navigating abusive marriages, ministry challenges, and the journey to rediscover their God-given identity.

    Whether you’re a pastor’s wife, married to a man in leadership, or simply navigating the tension between cultural expectations and God’s calling, this episode will inspire you to seek truth, embrace courage, and step into the freedom God has for you.

    Key Takeaways:

    The Pastor’s Wife Role: Cultural, Not BiblicalMany assume the role of the pastor’s wife is biblically mandated, but Beth reveals that it is a cultural construct that emerged in modern history. While the role can be valuable for those called to it, it is not the primary calling for all women. Recognizing this truth is freeing and helps dismantle harmful expectations.

    Empowering Lessons from Black ChurchesBlack pastor’s wives have historically embraced more freedom and authority in their roles, often co-pastoring or pursuing ministry outside their husband’s church. Unlike white evangelical churches, where the pastor’s wife is expected to embody the “ideal” biblical woman, Black church traditions emphasize authenticity and community support.

    The Legacy of Women in Church LeadershipThe medieval church had space for women in leadership, with figures like Mary Magdalene, Hildegard of Bingen, and Catherine of Siena preaching and holding authority. Beth challenges listeners to revisit Romans 16, where women are commended as apostles, deacons, and house church leaders, proving that women’s leadership has always been part of God’s design.

    The Rise of Complementarian Theology and Its HarmComplementarian theology, which ties women’s worth to their husband’s ministry, rose in the 20th century as a reaction to women gaining autonomy in society. This theology pressures women to prioritize their husband’s needs over their own, often leading to emotional and spiritual harm. It also isolates pastor’s wives, making it difficult for them to find support or speak out against abuse.

    The Burden of Perfection and the Danger of SilencePastor’s wives—and women in ministry—often feel pressured to maintain an image of perfection, from their appearance to their children’s behavior. This isolation becomes dangerous when they are in abusive marriages, as speaking out can cost them everything. Leslie and Beth discuss the importance of breaking the silence, seeking support, and prioritizing safety over the preservation of harmful institutions.

    Becoming God-Centered, Not Husband-CenteredWomen are often taught to center their lives on their husbands, but true freedom comes from being God-centered. Leslie and Beth encourage listeners to seek God’s voice and ask, “What are you calling me to do?” Each woman is uniquely gifted and called for a purpose beyond cultural expectations.

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