Episodes
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Have you ever struggled to do things the same way as everyone else? Even when you know your way works for you, and works well, people insist you do it "properly". You might even start to doubt yourself, and to worry that there's something fundamentally wrong with you.
Join Kendra Patterson and I as we "do it wrong". We'll explore the relationship between what we do and what happens. We'll look at they way privileging one experience of the world limits us all. We'll share our own experiences of doing things right for us even when we're told we're "doing it wrong".
Kendra is a writer, social scientist and podcaster. She coaches creative people who think differently to those around them. You can find episodes of her podcast at https://steppingoffnow.com/
EDIT: You can listen to me being interviewed on Kendra's podcast here - https://steppingoffnow.com/e62-interview-matthew-bellringer-on-neurodiversity-adhd-hsp-and-creativity/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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It seems like creative people have a vision, then single-mindedly set about making it reality. But what if not all creativity looks like this? What if sticking to a linear path can do us more harm than good?
The output of the creative process can look very polished, but for many it doesn't feel that way whilst its happening. It's frustrating, contradictory and just plain uncomfortable. Though looking back, the process itself feels more important than the thing that gets created.
Join Christopher Dines and me as we find out what it means to be driven to create. We'll explore the role of creativity working with ourselves and others. We'll see how making tangible things helps this process. We'll share our own experiences of trying to work with limitations rather than against them.
Christopher Dines is a British author, novelist, mindfulness teacher and former house DJ. He helps people find more creativity whilst being kinder to themselves and others. He is currently writing his ninth book.
You can find more about Christopher's work and get in touch with him at https://christopherdines.com/ and find his latest book, "Super Self-Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles", at https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1529330548
christopherdines #superselfcareDelightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Episodes manquant?
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We can't stop and mess about when there's important work to be done. We can only play when there won't be negative consequences. But what if play, and the active exploration of the situation, was a vital tool for effective working? What if in engaging with challenging things in this way we can find better ways of doing things?
Join Troels Andersen-Kjaer and me as we find out what it means to be "safe to play". We'll explore the role of play in developing expertise. We'll look at whether play is always easy and fun. We'll share our own experiences of using playful approaches to adapt and develop.
Troels is a creative educator, facilitator, and social anthropologist. He works with schools, companies, and individuals, using games for learning and discovering actionable, human-centered insights. You can find out more about him and his work at his website - https://trolnir.com/ - including Dungeons and Danish, an ongoing series of Danish language lessons in a fantasy roleplaying setting.
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Ever been told you're doing things the hard way? Do you feel your jaw clench when you hear a sentence beginning with "why don't you just..."?
We don't have to do everything from scratch, but solutions to complex life problems can never be one-size-fits-all. If you're significantly different from those around you this can be even harder. There can be unseen reasons why the "simple" solution isn't available to you. The direct approach to the problem might be denied to you all together.
Join Helen Read and I as we find out what it means to do things the hard way. We'll explore why "hard" is not always the same thing to different people. We'll look at the ways "good practice" can get in the way of what really works. We'll share our own experiences of finding easier ways of doing things that work for us.
Helen is a Consultant Psychiatrist and founder of ADHD Consultancy. One of the few psychiatrists with an ADHD diagnosis themselves, she takes an evidence-based, integrative approach to treatment. Helen has specific expertise in working with the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria which so often accompanies the condition. You can find out more about her work and get in touch with her at https://www.adhdconsultancy.co.uk/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Without having a way to understand the world - a system - we feel lost. Other people expect us to have a system which makes sense to them, and to explain what we do based on that.
But what happens when we're in a situation where we don't have a good way of understanding what's going on? And what happens when we have a different way of understanding what's going on to those around us?
Join Andrew Hugill and me as we find out if "you've got to have a system". We'll explore when systems work, and when they don't. We'll look at alternative ways of organising reality. We'll share our own experiences of using different ways of understanding the world in positive ways.
Andrew is a composer, musicologist and creative technologist. He is a Professor of Music, and a Professor of Creative Computing. You can find more about him and his work on his website, https://andrewhugill.com, read his blog at https://www.autisticprofessor.uk and find out about his Aural Diversity project at https://auraldiversity.org
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Ever struggled to figure something out whilst sat still? Ever tried to learn something physical but found your brain getting in the way? We're told that the mind directs the body. That the best way to think things through is by sitting still, and the best way to learn is to remember the steps of a process and act them out. What if that's not the whole picture?
Join Elizabeth Arifien and me as we find out if you really do think with your brain. We'll explore how how movement, language and words work alongside thought. We'll look at different learning modalities and the ways neurodivergent people can learn differently and successfully. We'll share our own experiences understanding the world in ways that go beyond thought.
Elizabeth creates emotive dance performances, films, talks and workshops for others placing personal, societal and political issues at the forefront of conversations.
She is the founder and artistic director of two social enterprises; Move Beyond Words where they amplify the voices of artists with dyslexia and Creative Dance London who facilitate transformation through creative dance sessions which have reached audiences across the globe. Elizabeth’s creative endeavours come from a place of curiosity and kindness.You can find out more about Elizabeth's work and get in touch with her through her website - https://elizabethrosearifien.com/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told that we should fit in. That it's safer that way. That we should stick with what we - and other people - know. But what if in attempting to fit in we lose sight of ourselves and our unique talents? What if the things that allow us to feel safe are different from those around us?
Join me and Ann Skinner as we explore "fitting in". We'll look at how trying to fit in can result in feeling exhausted and spread too thin. We'll see how for some people, exploring at the edges can feel safer than being in the comfortable middle. We'll share our own experiences of reclaiming a connection with self through play, creativity and joy.
Ann Skinner, aka Ann The Heartworker, is a Coach and Creative & the Founder of The Heartworker's Way.
In her work as a Life Coach, Creative Guide and Facilitator, Ann helps you realign to your heart centre, so you may gain a greater understanding about who you are, why you are here and what it is you need to be able to live a life that is true to you.
In her work as an Author, Illustrator and Doodle Artist, Ann hopes to bring a little more consciousness, reflection, joy, hope and inspiration into your life. Ann is a published Author/Illustrator of two books, The Art of Contribution and Annie and Eva Love Devon.
< https://theheartworker.com/>
Sign up for more about The Three Keys to The Heartworker’s Way - https://www.theheartworkersway.com/sign-up-to-three-keys
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Ever been told in accusatory tones that "you've changed"? Had a sense that your desire to change things for the better - for yourself and others - is a personal failing? That by growing and developing it feels like you've somehow let someone down.
Join me and Reuben Wachs as we explore the tension between acceptance and development, and what happens when "you've changed". We'll look at how much control we have over change and what happens when we do. We'll see how we influence the direction of change in positive ways without forcing it. We'll share our own experience attempting to engage with shame, blame and anxiety in loving, unconditional ways.
Reuben is a trainee integrative counsellor, who having struggled with his own mental health, now has a passion for sharing resources and theory to create effective change for those in need. You can find some on this on his podcast, Reuben Recommends:
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/reuben-recommends/id1555563972Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/7LkbnpHEotYa2JW71A8ueH?si=bdiosS8_T_OpR9HIbyOErwReuben also coaches people on public speaking, and podcast and video production. You can find more about him and his work on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/reubenwachs/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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You can buy a bar of chocolate in any supermarket. It's a treat, an indulgence. What matters is that it tastes good. But what if there was more to chocolate than a sugar hit?
Join me and Dan Knowlson as we explore the idea that "it's just chocolate". We'll explore how chocolate - and cacao - can play a role in transformative experiences. We'll see what harm can arise when a natural product becomes separated from it's origin. We'll share our own experience of combining traditional and modern approaches to create new opportunities.
Dan is a cacao ceremonialist, teacher and mentor. His mission is to bring change through connection to heart, nature, spirit and cacao. He works with all who are on their own healing and explorational journey, specialising in the balance between masculine and feminine. Working with cacao since 2010, he makes award-winning raw chocolate goodies, teaches, and holds regular ceremonies. You can find Dan's chocolate at https://www.elementsforlife.co.uk/ and information about his cacao ceremonies, including training for those who would like to host their own, at https://courses.cacaomastery.com/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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If we feel bad we're expected to do something about that. To take a pill or to improve things so we don't feel bad. Perhaps to simply "toughen up" and work through whatever we are experiencing. But what if by not giving ourselves the space to engage with unpleasant feelings makes it harder to enjoy the good things in life and to be effective? What if by trying to keep ourselves and others safe, we can do the opposite?
Join me and Anita Toze as we look at what happens when we try to avoid feeling bad. We'll explore the role of emotions and how those we've learnt to avoid can help us. We'll see when sensitivity can become a gift rather than a burden, not just to ourselves but to others. We'll share our own experience of navigating the space between research, theory, and the messiness of real life.
Anita is a psychotherapist and clinical psychologist. She supports people to have the courage to express themselves freely, and to rise to the challenge of the hardest problems we all face. She uses CBT, schema therapy, ACT, mindfulness and a range of other approaches to create the space for people to develop greater self-understanding and self-compassion. You can get it touch with Anita on LinkedIn at https://www.linkedin.com/in/anitatoze-psychotherapist-consultant/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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When we want something we're told that we must take bold, decisive action to get it. That hesitation is a sign of weakness. That we keep ourselves and those we care about safe by staying in control. But what if the need to fix something immediately can do the opposite of keeping us safe?
Join me and Kevin Davidson as we find out what happens when we "do something about it". We'll explore what it means to be in control and the part emotions have to play in that. We'll see what happens when our fight-or-flight response is triggered in social settings. We'll share our own ways of working with situations when we don't know what to do.
Kevin is an international coach who specialises in coaching men unable to have children to feel complete. He helps people bridge the "knowing" and "doing" gap so they can achieve all they want, own their masculinity, and thrive through courage, connection and vulnerability. You can find out more about his work and get in touch with Kevin on his website - https://www.mindful-masculinity.com
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told that there's a right way to develop, and a right way to support others in their development. That if someone isn't reaching an important milestone then we should concentrate our efforts on getting them to change so they do. But what if this approach gets in the way of exactly the outcomes we most want to see and by focusing all efforts on a single method we miss out on better paths? What if the effect of working this way can leave a lasting legacy of reactive, painful experiences later in life?
Join me and Chloë Aldam as we find out what happens when we start "pushing buttons". We'll explore how we learn and develop and how that affects the way we support others in doing the same. We'll see when it can be better to take an unconventional path. We'll share our own experiences of working with and nurturing positive neurodivergence.
Chloë offers transformational coaching to re-awaken the dream of raising children with compassion and integrity. She works with parents who feel overwhelmed by busy family lives using the concepts of Simplicity Parenting. Combining this with mBIT coaching, our parenting skills go to a new level, eliminating unhelpful ways that have prevented us from expressing ourselves, integrating new learning with courage and confidence as we raise our children to adulthood and beyond. You can find out more about Chloë and her work on her website - https://www.chloealdam.com/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told - not always explicitly - that in order to be attractive and successful we must edit ourselves and our feelings. That we need to present a shiny, airbrushed, always-happy version of ourselves or risk rejection. But what if masking our feelings prevents us from fully connecting with others? What if by editing out the things we see as "flaws" we reduce and limit ourselves?
Join me and Michelle Roberton as we look at what happens when you strive to "hide the messy stuff". We'll explore the role of sense, feeling and expression in enabling us to fully connect with those around us. We'll see what lies beyond transactional relationships in both our personal and working lives. We'll share our own experiences of working with difficult emotions and in turning sensitivity from something that feels like a weakness into a strength.
Michelle is a sexual trauma and intimacy therapist and alchemist. Her passion is expressed as an invitation to explore a sense of ease and belonging in body and sex, that provides the loving relationship with self, for us to safely relate in the world. As a body love activist, She is launching her first online body love course for those who long for the freedom to express without self judgement and to feel at home in their skin and bones. You can find more about Michelle and her work at https://michelleroberton.com/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Ever feel vulnerable and anxious because you don't have a ready answer to a question? From early in life we're told how important it is to have an answer. Through school and into work, we're judged on our ability to quickly answer questions in a specific way. But what if searching harder for the answer to a question isn't always the way to resolve a complex problem? What if by taking a step back and asking a different question we could find an easier path through?
Join Philippa Aspey and me as we explore the assumption "I need answers". We'll explore where questions come from and how you can work with the. We'll look at the role of intuition in working with uncertainty. We'll share our own experiences of working with, rather than against, not knowing.
Phillipa is a psychotherapist, counsellor, psychospiritual/well-being facilitator and artist. She works with people who have found that the conventional answers don't seem to work for them. She guides people to explore their own path, and their own questions.
You can find out more about Philippa's work and her upcoming series of Safe-Space Wellbeing Workshops on her website - http://www.navigatingtheself.co.uk/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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Not everyone is blunt enough to say "who do you think you are?" explicitly, but if you're at all unusual it's still there, hanging around. We're expected to be able to justify ourselves and why we're doing things differently to everyone else. It feels like if we don't have a good explanation for what we do we'll be rejected. But what if these justifications got in the way of our most powerful, joyful work? What if they pushed away the people we most wanted to attract?
In this episode of Delightful Dissent I'll be talking to Abigail Rebecca about the question "who do you think you are?". We'll explore what happens when we spend our energy meeting other people's expectations. We'll see how imitating other peoples' success can leave us feeling unsatisfied. We'll share our own experience finding ways to express ourselves more unapologetically.
Abi is a Visibility Coach, Stylist & Speaker, and founder of Illuminated Leaders. Through her work, she empowers visionary entrepreneurial womxn to be highly visible in The Aquarian Age.
She believes that women are the natural leaders in this new world and we must be ‘seen’ in order to make an impact and fulfil our higher purpose. However, we often hold back because we feel different and not good enough. We doubt our natural talent and worry about being judged or criticised.
You can find out more about Abi and her work, and reach out and book a call on her website - https://www.abigailrebecca.com/ - and download her free e-book, Illuminate from within - https://www.abigailrebecca.com/ifw
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told that some of the ways we do things are fixed, that they can't be changed. That doing them this way is the only way that works even though it's difficult. That we just have to live with them. But what if accepting things is not always best for everyone? What if things aren't as fixed as they think they are?
Join Stephen Dargan and me as we look at the saying "that's just the way it is". We'll explore what lies between passive acceptance and unreasonableness. We'll see if having something too difficult to do is a good thing. We'll share our own experiences of helping others - and ourselves - do something genuinely different.
Stephen is a consultant, facilitator and coach who helps the people in organisations be both happier and more effective, and develop people-focused leadership. He is working to create a world where every workplace allows people to feel good about themselves. You can find out more about his work at https://wakeup.ie and can get in touch with him on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephen-dargan-happywork/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told that success comes from picking a goal and sticking to it. That doggedly pursuing the shortest path between A and B is the quickest way to get there. But what if directly pursuing a goal prevented you from finding easier ways to it? And what if you find out it isn't even the right goal in the first place?
In this episode of Delightful Dissent I'm talking to Kirsty Starmer about the idea you should do what you set out to do. We'll explore how planning can help and hinder us in creating positive outcomes. We'll see when it's appropriate to take the direct approach, and when it's better to approach problems obliquely. We'll share our own experiences of working with the uncertain and unexpected instead of against it.
Kirsty is a digital project manager and producer. She's anything but conventional, and loves finding unexpected solutions to boring problems. You can get in touch with her on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/kirstystarmer/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told taking responsibility means upholding a set of standards, and making things the way they 'should' be. That if we don't keep striving for that ideal, we've failed. That we're to blame for what went wrong. But what if trying to do everything yourself makes it riskier, not safer? And what if all of the standards we strive for are actually an illusion?
In this episode of Delightful Dissent I'm talking to Sophie Turton about the idea "it's all on me". We'll explore the effect of the endless hustle on us and the people we care about. We'll see if there are other ways to lead and support those around us. We'll share our own experiences of dealing with responsibility, idealism, perfectionism, and the need to make things better.
Sophie Turton is co-founder of The Joyful, a brand and marketing agency for movers, shakers and change makers. A self-confessed over-achiever with an adventurous rebel heart,
Sophie has often found herself both fighting against and striving for the ideal, creating an internal battle that has often prevented her from living fully and joyfully. Now, Sophie is on a quest to build a business that works like clockwork and doesn't trap her in it, and she's getting curious about what created her addiction to the hustle in the first place.
You can find out more about Sophie's work at https://www.wearethejoyful.com and get in touch via her LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/sophieturton/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told that the solution to suffering is more empathy. That if we put ourselves in others' place we can do what's needed. That we should follow the Golden Rule above all else. But what if too much empathy hinders our ability to help? What happens when we try to force empathy when it isn't there? And what happens when empathy simply isn't enough?
In this episode of Delightful Dissent I'm talking to Lauree Akhtar about the idea we should "be more empathetic". We'll explore the role of empathy in creating change, both positive and negative. We'll look at alternative approaches to making meaningful connections with others. We'll share our own experiences of working with compassion to foster positive transformation.
Lauree is the CEO of Working Socially, dedicated to providing custom tailored coaching for inspired leaders looking to unlock the collaboration, innovation, trust, and productivity of their teams and people.
She uses cross-functional techniques from agile practices, software and game development, and both clinical and nonclinical social work and psychology. She has produced and facilitated multiple agile and Future of Work conferences, and provides group workshops on a limited basis. Lauree's credentials include a Master's of Social Work, BFA in Game Development, Certified Scrum Master, and Change Management Specialist.
You can connect with her on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/laureeakhtar/ - find out more about her work on her website - https://www.working-socially.com/- and hear more from her on her Youtube webcast https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYmhTdj5E-k7PmMtjrHXATQ
Lauree provides free consultations to anyone interested to carry on the conversation for themselves, and is always excited to just chat with other coaches and leaders. Lauree is also available for speaking and conference facilitation opportunities.
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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We're told "if you fail to plan, you plan to fail". Right from childhood we're expected to have an acceptable answer to the question "what do you want to be when you grow up?". At work we're judged on whether the plans we create do what they predict. But what if an obsession with planning makes things harder to predict and less secure? What if by acknowledging that we are winging it, we can do better?
In this episode of Delightful Dissent I'm talking to John Cremer about what happens when we're believe we mustn't get caught without a plan. We'll explore the role that structure has to play in helping us adapt and experiment. We'll see whether faking certainty is always the best course of action. We'll share our own experiences of working with and finding freedom in uncertainty.
John is a professional speaker, facilitator and improviser and has deep expertise in an uncannily accurate method of reading people. He is the founder of the Maydays - one of the top performance improvisation companies in Europe and co-chair of My Sherpa - a business and personal development enterprise based the south of England. When he is not onstage speaking, presenting or improvising he is usually fly fishing.
You can find out more about John's speaking work at https://www.johncremer.co.uk and get in touch with him via LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jcremer/
Delightful Dissent is a live-recorded oddcast about challenging assumptions. You can find upcoming episode livestreams, and past recordings, at https://www.matthewbellringer.com/delightful-dissent.
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