Episodes
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In this heartfelt episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, hosts Waylon and Carlie welcome guest Cam Isaac for an enlightening and deeply personal discussion. Cam, who previously delivered a widely resonated TED Talk, revisits some of the key lessons from his journey and expands on the life experiences that led to his transformative insights.
The episode delves into Camâs evolving relationship with faith, authority, and community. He reflects on his upbringing, the challenges of navigating rigid structures, and the profound importance of humility and apology in parentingâa concept that challenges traditional norms of parental authority. The discussion also explores the value of collective fellowship over hierarchical leadership, emphasizing authentic connection and mutual support in spiritual practices.
Cam shares his emotional battle with stage-four lymphoma, highlighting the role of mindset, emotional awareness, and intuition in his recovery journey. He underscores the importance of listening to oneâs body, processing emotions, and breaking generational cycles of trauma. These insights resonate as Cam talks about finding peace within himself, which he describes as the ultimate gift he treasures after years of struggle.
The conversation touches on themes of love for the Holdeman Mennonite community, even amidst the complexities of leaving and navigating life outside of it. Cam's message is one of hope and encouragement for anyone walking similar paths, emphasizing that connection and mutual support are integral to the human experience.
The episode concludes with a poignant reminder that life is about âwalking each other home,â as the hosts and Cam express gratitude, love, and mutual respect for one another. This conversation is a moving testament to resilience, the power of shared stories, and the enduring impact of compassion and understanding.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode, Weylin continues his exploration of the theory of spiral dynamics, a psychological model for religious growth.
Follow us on Facebook:â â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ â Subscribe on Spotify:â â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â â Subscribe on YouTube:â â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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Episodes manquant?
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In this episode, Amanda and Weylin hear from Roberta, who was abducted from her mother by Hilltop Mission, a children's home that was then operated by Church of God in Christ Mennonite. Following her kidnapping, she details years of abuse including sexual assaults and regular beatings that left major emotional scars.Mamzy, as her loved ones call her, goes on to describe how her "foster parents" turned her into a missionary, pressing her to try to convert fellow indigenous children. At one point, she recounts, she was told to hide several Indigenous children within the childcare facility so that their parents could not take them home. Eventually, police intervened, stopping the abduction.As she grew older, she left the church and built a life of her own. Mamzy pursued an education in Indigenous counseling and has a family of her own.If you would like to learn more about her story, her forthcoming book is titled The Lucky One: A Memoir of the Sixty Scoop Woman by Roberta McKinnen.Follow us on Facebook:https://rb.gy/cj55tdSubscribe on Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490Subscribe on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Waylon and Amanda welcome Ray, who takes us on a journey through his life as a member of the Church of God in Christ Mennonite. Ray begins by introducing himself as someone currently living in Muskogee, Oklahoma, but his story starts in the small, tight-knit congregation of Crooked Creek in northern Alberta, Canada. At just four years old, Rayâs family moved to Kansas, where he grew up in the Fredonia congregation, a community that profoundly shaped his worldview and sense of belonging.
Ray shares vivid anecdotes from his upbringing, including the challenges of transitioning from one congregation to another at a young age and the deep familial roots that connected him to the church. His father was an outsider who joined the Holdeman faith, while his mother came from a well-established Holdeman family in Halstead, Kansas. These contrasting backgrounds provided Ray with a unique perspective on faith, tradition, and the sense of community within the church.
One of the most impactful chapters of Rayâs life was his time in the Holdeman voluntary service units, an alternative to military service for conscientious objectors. He recounts how this experience gave him the opportunity to step outside the insular Holdeman world and connect with others in meaningful ways while still adhering to the churchâs commitment to nonviolence. Ray reflects on the camaraderie, challenges, and moments of personal growth he experienced during his time in voluntary service, offering a rare glimpse into how this tradition shaped his understanding of work, service, and faith. His stories from this period reveal both the joys and the challenges of maintaining the Holdeman values in a broader societal context.
Throughout the conversation, Ray reflects on the distinct practices and beliefs that defined his early life. He discusses the church's emphasis on unity, the simplicity of lifestyle, and the powerful role of family in shaping personal and spiritual identity. He also touches on the sacrifices and decisions his parents made in their faith journey and how those choices impacted his own understanding of what it means to grow up within a high-control religious group.
Ray doesnât shy away from discussing the challenges of Holdeman life. He talks about the cultural expectations placed on individuals and families and the way those expectations influenced his upbringing. His stories offer a nuanced perspective on the joys and struggles of belonging to such a close-knit faith community.
This episode is a heartfelt exploration of roots, resilience, and faith as Ray offers a window into his lifeâs journey. Whether you grew up in the Holdeman church or are curious about its culture and traditions, this conversation is full of relatable moments and deep reflections on the enduring impact of faith, family, and service.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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In this episode of "Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories," we had the pleasure of sitting down with Wes Friesen from the Barron, Wisconsin congregation of Church of God in Christ Mennonite. Wes takes us on a journey through his life, sharing intimate and heartfelt stories about his upbringing, experiences within the church, and his eventual path out of the Holdeman community.Wes begins by recounting his childhood in Barron, Wisconsin, a place where he spent the majority of his formative years. He reflects on the strong sense of community and belonging that characterized his early life, describing the close-knit nature of the Holdeman Mennonite congregation and the deep-rooted traditions that shaped his worldview. Despite the warmth and support of the community, Wes also touches on the restrictive aspects of growing up in a high-control environment, where conformity and adherence to church doctrines were paramount.As Wes delves deeper into his story, he shares poignant anecdotes about pivotal moments in his life. He speaks candidly about the internal struggles he faced as he began to question the teachings and practices of the church. These moments of doubt and introspection eventually led him to seek a life beyond the confines of the Holdeman community.One of the most compelling parts of Wes's narrative is his account of the personal and emotional challenges he encountered during his transition out of the church. He talks about the feelings of isolation and the loss of familial connections that often accompany such a significant life change. Despite these hardships, Wes's resilience and determination shine through as he describes how he rebuilt his life, forging new relationships and finding a sense of purpose outside the Holdeman Mennonite faith.Throughout the episode, Wes's storytelling is infused with a mix of humor, reflection, and raw honesty. He shares lighter moments that highlight the quirks and idiosyncrasies of life within the church, providing listeners with a nuanced perspective on the Holdeman experience. At the same time, his more serious reflections offer a profound insight into the personal cost of leaving a high-control religious group.Wes's story is not just one of leaving, but also of growth and self-discovery. He talks about the newfound freedoms and opportunities he has embraced since leaving the church, and how these have allowed him to explore his own identity and beliefs. His journey is a testament to the strength and courage it takes to break away from a life that no longer aligns with one's values and to seek out a path that is true to oneself.In this episode, listeners are invited to witness Wes's transformation from a young boy in Barron, Wisconsin, to a man who has navigated the complexities of faith, community, and personal identity. His story is a powerful reminder of the resilience of the human spirit and the enduring quest for authenticity and freedom.Join us as we listen to Wes Friesen's inspiring journey on "Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories." His tale is a compelling addition to our series, offering hope and encouragement to anyone who has ever questioned their path and sought to forge a new direction in life.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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In this heartfelt episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, we sit down with Rosina Friesen, who offers a candid and inspiring account of her lifeâs journey. Born in 1950 in Crooked Creek, Alberta, Rosina grew up as the third of nine children in a bustling, hardworking family. Now living in Peace River, Alberta, she reflects on her early years in a traditional, close-knit community, shaped by the teachings of the Church of God in Christ Mennonite.
Rosinaâs story takes us through her career as a licensed practical nurse, a path she pursued with determination and compassion. She speaks about the joys and challenges of working in healthcare, especially as she balanced her professional aspirations with the church's strict gender roles and expectations. Her nursing career became a place where she could channel her innate drive to help others, but it also highlighted the tensions she felt between her evolving personal values and the constraints of her faith.
As Rosina began questioning the churchâs teachings, particularly its emphasis on conformity and control, she faced an inner battle that ultimately led to her decision to leave. She reflects on the courage it took to walk away from the only community she had ever known, and the profound personal growth she experienced in doing so. Leaving the church was not just about stepping into a new chapter but about rebuilding her sense of identity and autonomy. While it came with heartbreakâespecially in navigating relationships with loved ones still in the churchâit also brought new opportunities for self-discovery.
One of the most striking anecdotes Rosina shares is how, later in life, she took up running as a way to challenge herself and embrace her independence. She humorously recounts the struggles and triumphs of starting to run as an elderly woman, defying expectations and finding joy in surprising new ways. This anecdote reflects a recurring theme in her story: the resilience to embrace change, the courage to try something new, and the determination to live life on her own terms.
Rosinaâs journey is a powerful reminder that itâs never too late to reinvent yourself, seek freedom, and carve out a life that reflects who you truly are. With warmth, humility, and a spark of humor, she invites listeners to reflect on their own paths and the strength it takes to walk toward authenticity.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Amanda is joined by Herman Friesen, who shares his deeply personal story of growing up in a Holdeman Mennonite family and his life after leaving the church. Herman begins by recounting his early years, including his fatherâs role as a preacher and the significant moment when his father was "benched" from preaching when Herman was only four years old. He shares how he was converted at age 10 and baptized at 11, reflecting on the strong spiritual framework that shaped his childhood.As the conversation progresses, Herman dives into his experience of leaving the Holdeman church and navigating life beyond its strict boundaries. He talks about the struggles of breaking away from a high-control religious community, including the feelings of isolation, confusion, and loss. Herman opens up about how hard it was to reconcile the faith he was raised in with the new beliefs he was beginning to form. He shares the emotional toll of distancing himself from family and friends who remained in the church, highlighting the personal costs of leaving.Herman also discusses the sense of freedom he found after leaving, including the opportunities to explore different ways of thinking and living. He talks about building a new life, developing new friendships, and finding a different sense of purpose outside of the Holdeman church. His story is one of resilience, as he found ways to balance his respect for his roots with his desire for independence and personal growth.This episode provides an intimate, detailed look at what itâs like to grow up in and eventually leave a high-control religious environment. Hermanâs honesty and vulnerability make this episode a powerful exploration of faith, identity, and the challenges of starting over. Itâs a must-listen for anyone interested in the human side of religious transitions and personal transformation.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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This episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories features Tyson, a guest who joins Amanda to discuss his journey of personal growth, healing, and self-discovery. Tyson starts off nervously but quickly opens up, sharing how he envisioned a podcast like this two years ago as a way for people with similar experiences to connect and heal. Surprisingly, Tyson discovered the podcast only a few months prior, making his appearance feel almost serendipitous.
In the episode, Tyson dives into his background, touching on the struggles and turning points he encountered while grappling with his faith, identity, and community expectations. He candidly reflects on moments of self-doubt and the process of unlearning some of the restrictive beliefs he grew up with. Tyson emphasizes the importance of acknowledging pain and past traumas as steps toward finding peace. He and Amanda discuss the broader themes of community, acceptance, and what it means to find freedom while staying true to oneâs values.
Listeners will hear Tysonâs reflections on family and friendship, especially how relationships change when one's belief system evolves. His honesty offers an insightful look into how leaving or questioning a high-control church affects not only one's spiritual path but also personal relationships and self-worth.
This episode is a heartfelt and raw conversation, encouraging those who may feel isolated in their journey to find connection and support through shared stories. Tysonâs words will resonate with anyone who has experienced a period of questioning and transformation, particularly within tight-knit religious communities.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Weylin Unruh sits down with Nolan Raber to discuss his life growing up in the Church of God in Christ Mennonite community and his journey of leaving the church. Nolan starts by sharing his early years in Kidron, Ohio, where he spent the first eight years of his life. He reflects on the close-knit nature of the Holdeman community and the strong emphasis on conformity, which played a significant role in shaping his upbringing.
Nolan opens up about the expectations and pressures he faced as a young member of the church, touching on the social norms that guided everyday life and the ways in which questioning or deviating from the established beliefs was often met with resistance. He describes how the churchâs teachings permeated all aspects of life, from schooling to social interactions, creating an environment where adhering to the group's standards was seen as crucial for spiritual well-being.
As the conversation unfolds, Nolan recounts the internal struggle he experienced when his personal beliefs began to diverge from those of the church. He discusses moments of doubt, the fear of disappointing loved ones, and the difficulties of reconciling his own questions with the teachings he was raised to accept without hesitation. These conflicts eventually led him to step away from the Holdeman faith, a decision that came with both loss and newfound freedom.
Nolan also shares the challenges of adjusting to life outside the church, where navigating a world with different social norms, customs, and even dress codes was unfamiliar. He reflects on the process of building a new identity and forming relationships beyond the Holdeman community. Throughout the episode, Nolan's story is filled with moments of vulnerability, humor, and resilience, as he candidly talks about the ups and downs of transitioning from a life of rigid expectations to one of self-discovery.
This episode not only provides a window into Nolan's personal journey but also explores broader themes of cultural conditioning, faith, and the search for meaning. Itâs a compelling look at how leaving a tightly controlled religious environment can affect one's sense of self and worldview, and what it means to find oneâs own path in life.Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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The episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories features Amanda as the host and Waylon as the guest. The discussion dives into the concept of spiral dynamics, a psychological model used to explain human development and behavior, especially in the context of religion.
Waylon introduces spiral dynamics as a tool that has helped him understand why people react in different ways depending on their stage of psychological development. He emphasizes that the model is not hierarchical, meaning no level is inherently superior to another. Instead, each stage represents a necessary step in a person's journey.
Waylon describes spiral dynamics as particularly useful in explaining behaviors within religious communities, such as the Holdeman Mennonites. He talks about how his understanding of this model has influenced his view of human interaction and the ways people respond to religious teachings and authority.
The conversation touches on the nuances of how spiral dynamics can shed light on the conflicts and challenges people face when trying to engage with or leave high-control religious environments. Waylon provides examples of how people within these communities are often at different psychological stages, which can lead to misunderstandings or friction, especially for those who are questioning or evolving beyond the traditional teachings of the church.
Amanda guides the conversation, asking questions to clarify the model and its applications. The episode offers listeners insights into the complexities of human psychology within the context of faith and the Holdeman Mennonite experience.Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcastâ
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In this episode, titled "Avoidance Kills: A Discussion With Mary Byler," Amanda and Billy explore the impact of avoidance, a term used within the Church of God in Christ Mennonite for shunning. Mary Byler, founder of The Misfit Amish, discusses how the practice of avoidance, or shunning, within high-control Anabaptist communities perpetuates harm by isolating individuals and suppressing important conversations about abuse, trauma, and healing.
Mary shares her personal journey of leaving a plain-dressing community and the work she now does to support others through her organization. She emphasizes how avoidance not only affects those who are shunned but also creates a culture where the most vulnerable are silenced. Throughout the episode, Mary discusses her advocacy work, which includes educating professionals like child advocacy centers on how to better serve survivors of abuse from these insular communities.
This conversation sheds light on the psychological and emotional toll of avoidance, illustrating how it can cause lasting damage to individuals and communities. By tackling this issue head-on, Mary provides crucial insights into why addressing, rather than avoiding, these issues is vital for healing and justice.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, our very own Amanda Esau takes the spotlight to share her personal journey, while being interviewed by Starla and Jordie. Born in Phoenix to a mixed-race family, Amanda opens up about the challenges she faced growing up with a Hispanic mother and a Caucasian father. She recalls how the cultural and racial differences were met with resistance within the Holdeman church, sharing a painful moment when her father was told, "I guess somebody has to marry them," a reference to their interracial relationship.
Amanda walks listeners through her early years in Phoenix before moving at age 10. Her childhood story is a powerful reflection on navigating a rigid religious community as someone with a biracial background. Throughout the episode, she discusses how the church's racial biases and conservative values shaped her family dynamics and personal development.
As the conversation progresses, Amanda reflects on her eventual departure from the Holdeman church. Her story touches on deep issues such as family loyalty, the challenge of questioning long-held beliefs, and the courage it took to break away from a restrictive environment. Her journey reveals the difficulties of reconciling faith with personal identity, and the often-overlooked experiences of people of color within such a homogenous church community.
The episode ends on a hopeful note, with Amanda reflecting on the growth and freedom she found after leaving the church, and how her past shaped who she is today. Starla and Jordie offer thoughtful questions, making this episode an intimate and heartfelt exploration of identity, faith, and resilience.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, hosts Weylin and Amanda sit down with Jaclyn (Jackie) Peachey to discuss her life journey, growing up within the Holdeman community and eventually finding her way out. Jackie opens up about her early life in Moundridge, Kansas, where her father left the family when she was just nine months old. She reflects on the strength of her mother, who went to nursing school and raised Jackie and her siblings on her own, becoming one of Jackieâs greatest role models.
Jackie talks about her familyâs move to Kidron, Ohio, when she was six years old, describing the community as somewhat closed off, rooted in an Amish-Mennonite background. However, her family ties in the area helped ease the transition, and Jackie shares her fondness for the close-knit environment, even though it could be isolating.
The conversation turns more introspective as Jackie recounts her spiritual journey, including her struggles to fit in within the Holdeman church. She recalls feeling like an outsider, never quite connecting with the Holdeman way of life or understanding concepts like the Holy Spirit. This led to internal conflict, particularly after her baptism, when she initially felt a sense of joy but quickly slipped back into old behaviors, leaving her feeling guilty and disconnected.
One pivotal moment in Jackieâs story came when, at the age of 15, she and a close friend began to question whether the Holdeman church was truly the "one true church" as they had been taught. Their exposure to conservative Mennonites and Amish communities sparked deeper questions about faith, belonging, and the truth of their religious upbringing. Jackie shares the challenges of navigating these doubts in a community where questioning was discouraged, and how it impacted her sense of identity.
Throughout the episode, Jackie reflects on the difficulty of feeling like she had to present a false version of herself to fit in, and the relief and eventual growth that came with leaving the Holdeman church. Her story is one of resilience, self-discovery, and the courage to question long-held beliefs in the search for personal truth.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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This episode of "Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories" features Laura Smith, who shares her journey growing up in the Church of God in Christ Mennonite and her eventual departure from the church at the age of 20. Originally from the Walker, Missouri congregation, Laura's family moved to Monterey, Tennessee when she was 12, and she describes the challenges and experiences that came with that transition.
Laura delves into her early memories of the Holdeman Church, reflecting on the strict rules, community expectations, and the sense of belonging that defined her upbringing. She provides insight into the daily life of a young girl in the Holdeman community, including the limited access to mainstream culture and the emphasis on maintaining a lifestyle that aligned with the church's teachings. Laura speaks candidly about the internal and external pressures she faced, particularly as she grew older and began questioning the beliefs and practices she had been taught.
As she recounts her teenage years, Laura discusses the pivotal moments that led to her decision to leave the church. She describes the complexities of navigating relationships with family and friends who remained in the church, as well as the emotional toll of stepping away from the only community she had ever known. Laura shares personal anecdotes that highlight the difficulties of breaking free from a high-control environment, including the fear of ostracism and the struggle to find her identity outside the confines of the church's doctrine.
Throughout the episode, Laura's story is one of resilience and self-discovery. She speaks about the healing process and the new opportunities that opened up once she left the church. Laura also touches on the broader themes of autonomy, freedom of choice, and the journey toward self-acceptance, providing listeners with a heartfelt narrative that underscores the complexities of leaving a high-control religious group.
This episode offers a deep, personal look into the life of someone who grew up in and eventually left the Holdeman community, providing a relatable and poignant account of the challenges and triumphs faced along the way. Laura's story is a testament to the strength it takes to pursue one's own path, even when it means leaving behind a deeply ingrained way of life.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of "Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories," Weylin sits down with Chris, a former member of a Central Kansas congregation of the Church of God in Christ Mennonite. Chris offers a candid look into her life, from growing up in a rural farming family to navigating her way out of the Holdeman church and redefining her beliefs.
Chris recounts her childhood as the youngest of four daughters in a family that thrived on hard work and connection to the land. Her days were filled with farm chores, driving trucks during wheat harvest, and helping her father care for the animals. While she describes her upbringing as largely positive, she also touches on the underlying challenges, such as her family's financial struggles when a bad water well led to the loss of cattleâa hardship that cast a shadow on her early years and taught her resilience.
From an early age, Chris sensed that she was different. She was introspective and often found herself questioning the practices and teachings of the Holdeman church. This questioning nature set her apart and made her feel disconnected within the large congregation she was a part of. Chris shares her experience of being an introvert in a community that often felt overwhelming and how she found solace in her relationships with non-Holdeman relatives, which broadened her perspective and introduced her to ideas beyond the churchâs doctrines.
Throughout the conversation, Chris delves into her psychological journey, detailing how she turned to various authors and teachers to explore new ways of thinking. She reflects on how her personality and experiences shaped her worldview, and how, over time, she began to see religion as often mirroring the personality of its foundersâa realization that prompted her to question the foundations of her faith even more deeply.
Chris also speaks about the emotional and mental challenges of leaving the church, including the process of unlearning deeply ingrained beliefs and coping with the sense of loss that accompanies such a profound change. She emphasizes the importance of finding one's own path to healing and hope, sharing personal stories of growth and the small but significant steps she has taken toward reclaiming her sense of self outside the church.
In this heartfelt episode, Chris opens up about her ongoing journeyâa journey that is not yet complete but is filled with determination and a desire for authenticity. Her story is a powerful reminder of the complexities involved in stepping away from a high-control religious environment and the courage it takes to pursue a life aligned with oneâs true values. Join Weylin and Chris as they explore the nuanced paths of questioning, leaving, and ultimately, finding peace beyond the confines of a close-knit religious community.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, host Amanda sits down with David Justus, a former member of the Church of God in Christ Mennonite, to share his life journey that led him from the confines of the Holdeman community to the expansive wilderness of Alaska. David talks about his early years growing up in the Bonners Ferry congregation, where strict rules and expectations shaped every aspect of his life. He reflects on the sense of community and belonging he initially felt, and the gradual shift as he began questioning the churchâs teachings and the high control environment that governed his world.
David opens up about the inner turmoil of trying to conform to the churchâs strict doctrines while grappling with his own evolving beliefs. He shares personal stories that illustrate the conflict between maintaining his faith and the desire for personal freedom. As Davidâs doubts grew, so did his courage to explore life beyond the Holdeman church, despite knowing it would mean a painful separation from his family and friends.
A significant part of Davidâs story is his move to Alaska, a bold step that marked the beginning of a new chapter in his life. He describes the challenges of starting over in an unfamiliar place, far from the only community he had ever known. In Alaska, David found both the physical and emotional distance needed to reflect on his past and rebuild his life. The vast landscapes of Alaska became a backdrop for his journey of self-discovery and the pursuit of a life aligned with his true beliefs.
Throughout the episode, David shares the emotional highs and lows of leaving the Holdeman church, the difficulties of adjusting to life outside, and the resilience it took to carve out a new path for himself. Amanda guides the conversation with care, creating a space for David to share his story with honesty and depth.
This episode offers listeners an insightful look into the complexities of leaving a high-control religious group and the unexpected places that journey can lead. David Justusâs story is one of courage, transformation, and the pursuit of freedom, set against the dramatic backdrop of Alaskaâs wilderness. Join us as we explore his path from the Holdeman church to a life of independence and self-discovery.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode, Caleb Jesser and Dennis Goossen take listeners through the transformative decades of the 1940s to the 1960s for the Holdeman Church, officially known as the Church of God in Christ, Mennonite. This episode is part of the series "Our Heritage: Holdeman Mennonite History," which explores the critical changes and developments that shaped the church during societal upheaval.
The discussion opens with a reflection on the immediate post-war era. Caleb and Dennis provide context about how World War II's end brought significant changes globally and within the Holdeman community. They discuss how conscientious objectors returning from alternative service units brought back new perspectives, sometimes leading to tensions and debates within the church. These returning members had been exposed to broader societal norms and ideas, which sparked internal discussions about the community's engagement with the outside world and interpretations of core doctrines, including the churchâs emphasis on non-conformity to worldly practices.
Moving into the 1950s, the conversation shifts to how the Holdeman Church responded to the rise of modernity and secularism. The hosts discuss the church leaders' concerns over the growing influence of radio, television, and other forms of media, which were viewed as potential threats to spiritual purity. These new technologies were believed to be gateways to worldly influences that could erode the community's values. As a result, church leadership enforced stricter guidelines and promoted a more insular approach to protect their members from perceived moral decay.
As they explore the internal dynamics of the 1960s, Caleb and Dennis highlight the social and cultural shifts that impacted the Holdeman Church. This decade saw the church grappling with external pressures to modernize, which contrasted sharply with the desire to maintain traditional values. These discussions included debates on issues such as dress codes, musical influences, and levels of community involvement. These debates often created friction within the church, as some members pushed for a more adaptive approach while others sought to hold firmly to established traditions.
A significant part of the episode covers the factions that split from the church during this time of change. Caleb and Dennis discuss various groups that broke away due to disagreements over doctrinal interpretations, lifestyle practices, or the churchâs stance on modern influences. These splits often came after prolonged periods of internal conflict and were marked by deep divisions within congregations, reflecting the broader struggle between maintaining doctrinal purity and adapting to a rapidly changing world.
The episode also touches on the evolution of the church's governance and decision-making processes during this period. With the increasing complexities of managing a growing congregation, the church's leadership structure adapted to better address the diverse challenges faced by the community. This led to a more formalized approach to governance that continues to shape the church today.
In closing, Caleb and Dennis reflect on how the post-war period up to the late 1960s was a pivotal era of change for the Holdeman Church, setting the stage for its future. The church's responses to both external and internal pressures laid the groundwork for its modern identity and practices.
This episode provides a rich, detailed look at a crucial period in Holdeman Mennonite history, offering valuable insights into the community's struggles, adaptations, and steadfastness in faith.
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In this heartfelt episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Amanda sits down with Jordie, formerly known as Julie, to explore her journey into and out of the Church of God in Christ Mennonite. Jordie shares candid reflections on her childhood, growing up first in Linden, Alberta, and later in Pincher Creek. She speaks warmly of her early years, recalling a childhood filled with love, family, and a sense of community. However, Jordie also opens up about the duality of her experience, where alongside the warmth and happiness, there was an undercurrent of fear deeply rooted in the church's culture.
Jordie describes herself as a sensitive child who keenly felt the pervasive atmosphere of fear within the church environment. Despite the good memories, the fear she carried was something she internalized and never shared with others. Instead, she found solace in journaling and art, which became her private outlets for processing the complex emotions she experienced.
As the conversation unfolds, Jordie delves into the nuances of her identity and the significant steps she took in reclaiming her life after leaving the church. She discusses her decision to change her name from Julie to Jordie, symbolizing a new chapter in her life and a break from the past. Through her story, Jordie offers listeners a profound insight into the challenges of growing up in a high-control religious environment and the journey of finding one's true self outside of it.
This episode is a touching and relatable narrative for anyone who has grappled with the fear and expectations imposed by a strict religious upbringing. Jordie's story is one of resilience, self-discovery, and the power of creative expression in the face of adversity.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Weylin sits down with Doreen from the Crooked Creek congregation of Church of God in Christ Mennonite. She tells of her childhood in the church, her path out of the organization, and her faith journey after leaving.
Her story features candid discussion of childhood sexual abuse, emotional manipulation, and other traumatic events.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, host Amanda sits down with Carolyn, who shares her deeply personal journey of growing up and living within the Holdeman Mennonite community. Carolynâs story is one of resilience, especially as she navigates the complexities of being a woman and a single mother in a patriarchal and high-control religious system.
Carolyn begins by reflecting on her early years in Crooked Creek, where the church's teachings and sense of community provided her with a foundation. However, as she matured, she became increasingly aware of the strict roles imposed on women within the church. The expectations were clear: women were to be obedient, submissive and focused on homemaking and child-rearing. Carolyn describes the immense pressure to conform to these roles, which left little room for personal growth or autonomy.
As a single mother, Carolyn faced additional scrutiny and judgment from the church staff and the broader community. She recounts how her status as a single mother was often viewed with suspicion, as though it signified a failure to adhere to the churchâs standards of marriage and family life. The lack of support for single mothers within the church only exacerbated the challenges she faced, leaving her to navigate motherhood largely on her own while still trying to meet the churchâs demanding expectations.
Carolyn also speaks candidly about her interactions with church and school staff, who often reinforced patriarchal norms that kept women like her in subservient positions. She shares instances where she felt marginalized and disempowered by the male-dominated leadership, who were more interested in maintaining control than offering compassion or understanding.
The episode takes a significant turn as Carolyn questions the roles and expectations placed upon her. She reflects on the moment she recognized that her worth was not defined by the churchâs patriarchal standards but by her strength and values. This realization became a catalyst for her decision to leave the church and pursue a life where she could be true to herself and her children, free from the oppressive structures that had once held her back.
Carolynâs journey is not just one of breaking free from a controlling religious environment but also a story of reclaiming her identity as a woman and a mother. Despite the emotional and societal challenges, she emerges with a profound sense of self-worth and a determination to provide a better life for herself and her children, outside the confines of the churchâs rigid doctrines.
This episode offers a deeply moving exploration of the intersection between gender, religion, and personal freedom. Carolynâs story sheds light on the unique struggles faced by women and single mothers in high-control religious groups and underscores the courage it takes to defy patriarchal norms and forge a path of independence. Her testimony is a powerful reminder of the importance of self-empowerment and the strength that comes from breaking free of oppressive systems.
Follow us on Facebook:â https://rb.gy/cj55tdâ Subscribe on Spotify:â https://open.spotify.com/show/1KwYkbtbIswUN3z6JSrqz5?si=0913b1c334724490â Subscribe on YouTube:â https://www.youtube.com/@OurPeoplePodcast?sub_confirmation=1â Subscribe on Apple Podcasts:â https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/our-people-holdeman-mennonite-stories/id1740613045â Are you or is someone you know interested in sharing a story on the podcast? Reach out to [email protected] or message us on Facebook. We would love to hear from you.Support Us On Patreon:â https://patreon.com/OurPeoplePodcast
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