Episodes
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Conversations about sex are so important, but approaching the topic with a partner can feel overwhelming. When we come up against sexual challenges in our relationships, it can be easy to fall into patterns of blame and shame. Listening to this episode is a great first step as you find your voice and reclaim your power in your sex life. Youâll hear from psychologist and sex therapist Dr. Kate Balestrieri, who joins Dr. Alexandra for a conversation all about sexuality and her new book, What Happened to My Sex Life? They explore the importance of creating shared agreements and visions with your partner when it comes to sex, how to navigate retroactive jealousy, and the role safety plays in our sexual connections. They also respond to a listener question about how someoneâs sexual history can impact their current relationship dynamic.
Dr. Kateâs book: What Happened to My Sex Life? A Sex Therapist's Guide to Reclaiming Lost Desire, Connection, and Pleasure
Dr. Kateâs Instagram: @drkatebalestrieri
Dr. Kateâs website: Modern Intimacy
Get Naked with Dr. Kate (podcast)
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs episode is part of a solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (a.k.a. FOO roles). Weâre exploring how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it! All previous role-specific episodes are also linked below, along with the FREE Family of Origin Roles workbook, Reclaiming You.
Weâre taking a look at âThe Rebelâ role in todayâs episode. Some family systems are well-equipped to handle disagreement, debate, and resistance. But when a family is under pressure in any way, a child who questions or challenges the system is going to be seen as a threat. While the Rebel may cling to their strong opinions and double down on their critical stance, feelings of fear, isolation, and anxiety may occur and continue into adulthood, especially around conformity and authority. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Rebel can break free from old stories that their only path to safety was to push back and choose the path of opposition.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Reimagining Love episode: âPeople-Pleasing vs. Brutal Honesty: When & How to Share Feedback with Your Partnerâ
Reimagining Love episode: âWhen Having âNo Filterâ Hurts a Relationshipâ
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Episodes manquant?
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Todayâs episode is part of a solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (a.k.a. FOO roles). Weâre exploring how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it! All previous role-specific episodes are also linked below.
Weâre taking a look at âThe Parentified Childâ role in todayâs episode. The child cast into this role likely heard that they were âso mature,â âwise beyond their years,â or were praised for their comforting presence when they were growing up. The problem? Kids shouldnât have to provide emotional support to the adults in their family. Unfortunately for the Parentified Child, this felt like the surest route to safety and love, perhaps due to a chaotic environment, overwhelmed parents, or conflict in the family system. As an adult, the Parentified Child carries with them a certain set of beliefs and tendencies that they picked up as a kid in this role. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Parentified Child can free themselves from always taking on othersâ needs and create more egalitarian relationships that feel safe and nourishing.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Reimagining Love episode with Dr. Hillary McBride: Getting Present: Tuning Into Your Body with Dr. Hillary McBride
Reimagining Love series: âI Love My Partner, But Their Family is Toxicâ: Part 1, Part 2
Girlhood Interrupted: The Erasure of Black Girls' Childhood (Rebecca Epstein, Jamilia J. Blake, Thalia GonzĂĄlez, from the Center on Poverty and Inequality, Georgetown Law)
Past episodes of the Family of Origin Roles Series: Introductory Episode, The Perfect One (From Performance to Presence), The Easy One (From Accommodation to Authenticity), The Struggling One (From Scapegoat to Self-Advocate), The Peacemaker (From Referee to Realist)
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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On todayâs episode, weâre diving deep into the topic of attachment with guest Thais Gibson, an author, counselor, and the co-founder of The Personal Development School. While the discourse around attachment so often focuses on identifying whatâs âwrongâ with us, in this conversation, Dr. Alexandra and Thais explore how understanding and investigating our attachment style can create fertile ground for us to change the way we show up in relationships and break frustrating patterns. Our attachment style is not our destiny, and when we begin to understand the roots of this subconscious programming, we have the opportunity to reprogram ourselves for better and more fulfilling relationships. This episode will give you the tools and insights to start down that path and think more expansively about attachment.
Thaisâs Instagram, The Personal Development School
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs guest is Jillian Turecki, a certified relationship coach, teacher, author of the new book It Begins With You: The 9 Hard Truths About Love That Will Change Your Life, and host of the podcast, Jillian On Love. Youâve likely seen her wise and straightforward videos that get right to the heart of our most pressing dating and relationship questions. Sheâs helped thousands through her teachings, courses, writing, and her popular social media accounts to revolutionize their relationship with themselves so that they can transform their romantic relationships.
One of the central tenets of Jillianâs work is the idea that the common denominator in all your relationships is you. A lot of us know in our bones that creating safety inside ourselves is the key to healthy relationships with othersâbut we donât always know how to do this or where to start. Jillian and Dr. Alexandra also discuss estrangement and navigating complex relationships with family members. Tune in to todayâs episode to hear all of Jillianâs wisdom!
Relevant Links:
It Begins with You: The 9 Hard Truths about Love That Will Change Your Life by Jillian Turecki
Jillianâs Instagram & website
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs episode is part of a solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (a.k.a. FOO roles). Tune in on the first two Tuesdays of each month to learn about how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it!
Weâre taking a look at âThe Peacemakerâ role in todayâs episode. All families have conflict, and itâs common for one child in the family to play a referee or mediator role, either through intervention or more subtler peacemaking strategies, such as comic relief. As adults, Peacemakers likely find themselves between friends and family members when there are tensions and may struggle to extract themselves from these dynamics. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Peacemaker can embark on their healing journey.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Reimagining Love: Disrupting the Underfunctioning/Overfunctioning Dynamic
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Reimagining Love: âTending to âLittle Youâ & Exploring Your Family of Originâ
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs episode is part of a solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (a.k.a. FOO roles). Tune in on the first two Tuesdays of each month to learn about how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it!
Weâre taking a look at âThe Struggling Oneâ role in todayâs episode. In some families, there is an individual who needs more care and attention than others. There are a number of reasons why this might be the case, including a difference in ability, a behavioral challenge, or a mental health condition. In any case, the âstruggling oneâ is the recipient of a lot of the family systemâs energy, and this dynamic may lead to certain challenges and strengths for that person in adulthood. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Struggling One can embark on their healing journey.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Minorities Less Likely to Be Identified for Special Education, Study Finds (EducationWeek)
âBoys are disappearingâ from mental health care as signs of depression go undetected (NBC News)
Girls With Social and/or Attention Deficit Re-Examined in Young Adulthood: Prospective Study of Diagnostic Stability, Daily Life Functioning and Social Situation (National Library of Medicine)
The "Spoon Theory" (Christine Miserandino, www.butyoudontlooksick.com)
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Reimagining Love: âTending to âLittle Youâ & Exploring Your Family of Originâ
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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On todayâs episode of Reimagining Love, Vanessa & Xander Marin join Dr. Alexandra for a frank and compassionate conversation about sexâspecifically, sex in long-term relationships. Itâs normal for couples to fall into a rut in the bedroom, ranging from sex feeling kind of âmeh,â to long periods without any intimacy at all. These ebbs and flows are part of being in a long-term relationship or marriage, and the good news is, there are actions you can take to chart a new course with your partner and to get excited about each other again. Vanessa and Xander are a couple who have been creating that very roadmap for folks, through their amazing online courses, their podcast, Pillow Talks, and their New York Times-bestselling book, Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life. Vanessa is a sex therapist with 20 years of experience who has been featured in outlets like O, The Oprah Magazine, Harperâs Bazaar, Vogue, and Goop, and she has written for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker. And Xander? Well, he is a âregular dudeâ who left his corporate job to join Vanessa in this work. Together they blend clinical wisdom, humor, openness, and their own personal stories to normalize talking about our sex lives and to offer techniques for improving yours. You are going to hear about their personal experience with couple therapy and how they landed on the agreement, âIf it matters to one of us, it matters to both of us.â They share so many juicy insights about sex, from desire discrepancy to initiation to their amazing acronym âP.L.E.A.S.E.,â which youâll learn in this conversation. This episode will give you the confidence to shift the way you and your partner talk about sex and couple therapy, as well as anything else you might be stuck on.
Relevant Links:
Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life by Vanessa & Xander Marin
Vanessa & Xanderâs website: https://vmtherapy.com/https://vmtherapy.com/
Vanessa & Xanderâs courses & challenges: https://vmtherapy.com/holiday-gift-guide-2024
Vanessa & Xanderâs podcast, Pillow Talks: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pillow-talks/id1569466131
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs episode is part of a solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (a.k.a. FOO roles). Tune in on the first two Tuesdays of each month to learn about how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it last month!
Weâre taking a look at âThe Easy Oneâ role in todayâs episode. If you were the kid who could always âgo with the flowâ in your family, this might be you. As a child, you didnât express a lot of needs (even though you had them, as we all do!), and that may have been a relief to the Big People in your system, because their attention was needed elsewhere. As an adult, you may identify as a people-pleaser, always attuning yourself to the people around you, wondering how you can make them comfortable or happy. You may believe youâre only worthy to the degree that youâre accommodating others. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Easy One can embark on their healing journey.
Visit www.masterclass.com/alexandrasolomon to check out the class I co-taught with Ryan Holiday and other experts about the wisdom of ancient philosophy and how it can help us improve communication, resilience, and relationships.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Reimagining Love: âTending to âLittle Youâ & Exploring Your Family of Originâ
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Resources about power exchange / kink:
From Michelle Herzogâs Center for Modern Relationships: Article Part I, Article Part II Pleasure Mechanics: CoursesPleasure Mechanics: Podcast episodeDipsea: âHow to explore light bondage play with your trusted partnerâ by Toni Sicola (2021)Pillow Talk Podcast (Vanessa + Xander Marin): How To Spice It Up In the Bedroom: Exploring Kink For BeginnersTIME Article: âWhy I Kept My Kinks a Secretâ by R.O. Kwon (2024)British GQ: âA dominatrix gives a beginners guide to kinkâ by Daisy Schofield (2024)Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Todayâs episode is part of a new solo series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles (aka FOO roles). Tune in on the first two Tuesdays of each month to learn about how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messages about love, connection, and worthiness as a result. Check out the introductory episode of the series if you missed it last month!
Up first in Dr. Alexandraâs exploration of family roles is âThe Perfect One.â If you were the superstar kid in your family, known for bringing home good grades and accolades, this might be you. As an adult, perhaps you seek validation and affirmation of your worthiness through tangible accomplishments. You may believe youâre only as good and worthy of love as your job title, latest career win, parenting flex, or fitness milestone. Does this sound like you, or someone you love? Listen to the episode to learn more about this role and how The Perfect One can embark on their healing journey.
Visit www.masterclass.com/alexandrasolomon to check out the class I co-taught with Ryan Holiday and other experts about the wisdom of ancient philosophy and how it can help us improve communication, resilience, and relationships.
Relevant links:
Get the FREE Family of Origin Roles Workbook: Reclaiming You
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Reimagining Love: âTending to âLittle Youâ & Exploring Your Family of Originâ
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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We all know that when weâre stressed, weâre not our best selves. But what happens when this stress threatens to erode our most important relationships, and we feel powerless to change the dynamic? Returning guest Elizabeth Earnshaw joins Dr. Solomon to address this pressing yet common issue. Liz is a licensed family and marriage therapist, Certified Gottman Therapist, AAMFT Approved Supervisor, and founder of A Better Life Therapy. Sheâs known for her popular Instagram account @lizlistens, is the author of I Want This to Work, and has been featured in the New York Times, USA Today, The Washington Post, and more. Her newest book, âTil Stress Do Us Part: How to Heal the #1 Issue in Our Relationships, is an empowering guide to stress-proofing your relationship.
While we may initially believe itâs our relationships that are the cause of our stress, Liz says that itâs often the other way around: that âthe unprecedented collective stress we all face today is the cause of many relationship challenges couples are experiencing.â In this episodes, you'll hear Lizâs deeply empathetic re-frame of this issue. Liz and Dr. Alexandra discuss why our partner often gets the âworstâ version of us, how we can understand different types or âbucketsâ of stressors, and the small but mighty changes we can make that will serve our relationships for the long haul. They also focus on the pressures of parenthood and what makes this moment particularly challenging for parents. Finally, they answer a question from a listener in Idaho named Amber about how to move forward after a rift in a friendship.
Relevant Links:
Lizâs book: 'Til Stress Do Us Part: How to Heal the #1 Issue in Our RelationshipsLizâs website and InstagramParents Under Pressure: The U.S. Surgeon General Advisory on the Mental Health and Well-Being of Parents (2024)Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthyâs essay in The New York Times Opinion section, August 2024: Surgeon General: Parents Are at Their Witsâ End. We Can Do Better.Order Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
Todayâs episode is the first of a new solo episode series on Reimagining Love about Family of Origin Roles. Tune in on the first two Tuesdays of each month to learn about how the roles we were cast into as children and held within our family systems shape how we show up in our relationships today. Whether you were the one who held the family together, the rebel who pushed back against household norms, or the âeasyâ kid who flew under the radar, we all inhabited a position in the community of our family and absorbed certain messaging about love, connection, and worthiness as a result.
To start off this series, weâre revisiting this in-depth solo episode, in which Dr. Alexandra explains the six common roles we might have played in our original family systems. Through understanding our past, we can see how these roles continue to show up in our relationships today and use that knowledge as a powerful Relational Self-Awareness tool. In December, weâll begin releasing role-specific episodes for each of the six roles, starting with âThe Perfect One,â so be sure to catch that conversation next month.
Relevant links:
Take the Family of Origin Roles Quiz
Reimagining Love: âTending to âLittle Youâ & Exploring Your Family of Originâ
Dr. Alexandraâs Psychotherapy Networker Article
Order Dr. Alexandraâs book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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Have you ever felt like different parts of yourself were competing for attention and power? Maybe you have aspects of your personality that youâre proud of, and others that youâd rather keep hidden from the worldâthe ones that tend to rear their heads in your not-so-shining moments. According to Internal Family Systems Therapy, a framework developed by todayâs guest, Dr. Richard Schwartz, we are all made up of sub-personalities or âparts.â IFS posits that by investigating and understanding where each of those parts come from and how they are dictating our current behavior, we can better understand our unique mental world and determine how to make change to support our healing and improve our relationships. Dr. Alexandra talks with Dr. Dick about how IFS has the potential to help individuals understand themselves, strengthen their romantic relationships, or even navigate the dating world. They also explore a question from a listener in Toronto who wants to feel more deeply understood in conversations with her boyfriend.
IFS is a theoretical framework that has helped many folks, but as always, Dr. Alexandra encourages you to see what resonates with you in this conversation and what might be helpful to bring into your own processes of self-discovery and healing, and to your relationships.
Relevant Links:
IFS Institute: ifs-institute.comIntimacy From The Inside Out: https://ifs-institute.com/store/116No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard Schwartz, Ph.D.: https://bookshop.org/p/books/no-bad-parts-healing-trauma-and-restoring-wholeness-with-the-internal-family-systems-model-richard-schwartz/16396062?ean=9781683646686You Are the One You've Been Waiting for: Applying Internal Family Systems to Intimate Relationships by Richard Schwartz, Ph.D.: https://bookshop.org/p/books/you-are-the-one-you-ve-been-waiting-for-applying-internal-family-systems-to-intimate-relationships-richard-schwartz/18790456?ean=9781683643623Story on IFS from NPRâs Morning Edition: https://www.npr.org/sections/shots-health-news/2024/10/25/nx-s1-5055753/parts-work-therapy-internal-family-systems-anxiety#:~:text=At%20the%20center%20of%20IFS,his%20book%20No%20Bad%20Parts. -
What would your reaction be if someone asked if youâre codependent? If âCertainly not!â is your immediate response, this episode invites you to look a little deeper. While we often turn to a single definition of codependencyâenabling another person in a situation that is damaging or dangerous, such as addictionâTerri Coleâs new book, Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency, expands on this traditional and insufficient definition to include those who are âoverly invested in the feelings of the people in our lives to the detriment of our own internal peace.â
Terri is a licensed psychotherapist, empowerment coach, and recovering high-functioning codependent. In therapy sessions with her highly capable patients, Terri noticed a lot of pushback when she would suggest that they might be codependent. However, when she clarified her updated definition, they immediately recognized these traits in themselves and could begin recovering from these detrimental behaviors. It is likely that you recognize these traits in yourself or someone close to you, so I hope that you will come away enlightened and empowered from Terriâs explanation of the clues that highlight these traits, the heavy cost to both the individual and their loved ones, and how we can all be of service to others without adopting problematic patterns. We also unpack a thoughtful question from a listener in Nova Scotia Canada about rebuilding a damaged relationship with her four adult children.
Relevant Links:
Learn more about Terri ColeOrder Terriâs book, Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning CodependencyGet your copy of the HFC WorkbookJoin the Teri Cole MembershipOrder Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
The decision to cut off a family member is a difficult one. Estrangement is an attempt to solve a painful, systemic relationship problem. This monumental move should be deeply considered, and my collectivist approach to therapy encourages being curious about and striving to understand how the different contexts our family membersâepsecially those with a generational divideâgrew up and live within can impact how we show up in our relationships. Without, of course, ever dismissing the very real trauma that can precede an estrangement.
In this in-depth solo episode, I explore the dynamics of cut-offs, including what both the official research and my recent social media survey have to say. Then, I offer three relational self-awareness questions for folks on both sides of the estrangement experience: those considering cutting off a family member and those who are about to be or have been cut off.
These questions aim to support compassionate dialogue that increases both partyâs chances of finding a solution. Whether you are the estranger or the estranged, it is my hope that this conversation will leave you with some tools and a perspective you may not have considered, one that takes each personâs lived experience into consideration and opens up the possibility of finding a middle ground between an unhealthy status quo and walking away.
Relevant Links:
Get your companion workbook - https://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/cutoffMy talk on 1A: âWhen Loved Ones Become Strangersâ - https://the1a.org/segments/when-loved-ones-become-strangers/Reimagining Love Episode: âEnd or Mend: Managing Difficult Family Relationships with Nedra Tawwabâ - https://dralexandrasolomon.com/podcasts/end-or-mend-managing-difficult-family-relationships-with-nedra-tawwab/APA article: âEstrangement Is Never Easy or Straightforward. Psychologists Can Helpâ - https://www.apa.org/monitor/2024/04/healing-pain-estrangementVogue article: âWhy So Many People (Myself Included) Are Experiencing Family Estrangementâ - https://www.vogue.com/article/why-so-many-people-are-experiencing-family-estrangementAeon article: âEstrangementâ - https://aeon.co/essays/modern-culture-blames-parents-for-forces-beyond-their-controlOrder Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
In North America, weâre conditioned from an early age to cultivate specific components of our full personalities and curtail others. For people socialized as girls, traditionally âfeminineâ qualities such as softspokenness and emotional exploration are encouraged, while assertiveness is discouraged. For people socialized as boys, qualities like toughness and a stiff upper lip are considered masculine, and they are advised against being open about their feelings.
But as hard as patriarchal society has worked to separate us into specific personas based on our sex, the truth is that we all carry masculine and feminine energies within us. In this episode, marriage and family therapist and Depth Psychology expert DenĂ© Logan embarks with me on an exploration of how we manage, heal, and share our internal energiesâthis is the fascinating topic of her new book, Sovereign Love: A Guide to Healing Relationships by Reclaiming the Masculine & Feminine Within.
Relevant Links:
Order DenĂ©âs book, Sovereign Love: A Guide to Healing Relationships by Reclaiming the Masculine & Feminine WithinConnect with DenĂ© on InstagramListen to the Cheaper Than Therapy podcastOrder Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
Founder and CEO of YourTango, Andrea Miller, joins Dr. Share to share the power of being a lifelong âseekerâ of relational wisdom. Andrea has dedicated her life to connecting her audience with relationship experts and celebrating relational wisdom, and today, invites us into her journey of opening herself up to loveâs lessons.
Relevant links:
Learn more about YourTangoListen to Dr. Alexandra on Open Relationships: Transforming Together with Andrea MillerRadical Acceptance: The Secret to Happy, Lasting Love by Andrea MillerOrder Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
Loss and grief are universal and profoundly human. The death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a trauma that drastically shifts the trajectory of a lifeâeach spurs a unique grieving process that can be difficult to navigate for both the people grieving and their support systems. As a chaplain at a Level One Trauma Center in Florida, J.S. Park provides emotional and spiritual care for and comfort to those experiencing grief. His support of patients at the end of their lives, and of the loved ones who remain, adds tremendous impact and compassion to his most recent book, As Long As You Need: Permission to Grieve.
In this episode, J.S. shares with Dr. Alexandra what his education and experience have taught him about the ârightâ things to say and the ways to support grieving loved ones. He offers deeply considered insights into our misguided fear of bringing up the deceased, the impact of loss on the past and the future, and how to care for both a loved one and oneself during the grieving process.
Relevant Links:
Order J.S.âs book, As Long As You Need: Permission to GrieveConnect J.S. on InstagramOrder Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
What happens when we listen and are listened to more fully, forging a deeper connection? Decades of research tell us that the brain undergoes physiological changes when we begin to âtalk without criticizing, listen without judgment, and connect beyond difference.â This is the definition of dialogue coined by todayâs guests, Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt and Dr. Harville Hendrix.
Doctors Hunt and Hendrix are internationally recognized couples therapists, educators, speakers, and a married couple themselves. Through decades of research, they developed the Imago Relationship Therapy method, which is taught to therapists around the globe. In this episode, they speak with Dr. Alexandra about moving from monologue (turning the conversation to focus on oneself) to dialogue (keeping the conversation focused on the speaker), and how listening and ensuring true understanding of a speakerâs meaning has enormous benefits to our relationships and our brains.
Relevant Links:
Harville and Helenâs new book, How To Talk to Anyone About Anything - https://harvilleandhelen.com/books/how-to-talk-with-anyone-about-anything/Learn more about Imago Relationship Therapy - https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/Explore Safe Conversations, A Methodology for Connecting - https://safeconversations.com/Order Dr. Alexandra's latest book, Love Every DaySubscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs NewsletterSubmit a Listener Question -
In this two-part series, Dr. Alexandra shares ten essential skills for couples struggling with routine conflict in their relationship. Offering strategies from her couples therapy practice, Dr. Alexandra provides new language and ways of thinking about arguments that promote empathy and care, shifting couples into a "we" perspective so that they can move through hard times as a team.
Relevant links:
Listen to Part One of the Conflict series
Access the Conflict Skills worksheet
Couples therapy directories:
Gottman Referral NetworkTherapist.comPsychology TodayDomestic Violence Resources
Order Dr. Alexandra's new book, Love Every Day
Subscribe to Dr. Alexandraâs Newsletter
Submit a Listener Question
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