Episodes
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Candice is back on the main feed with a final #gotv reminder and a deep-dive into this thing we call 'hope' - what is it, really? She shares about her pre-election anxiety and how she's actualizing hope in the face of so muchness. Various definitions of hope are offered, then she digs into the groundbreaking work of her late mentor, C.R. Snyder, 'the hope guy', sharing what she learned in the late '90s torturing freshmen in his research lab at The University of Kansas. What's the real-deal difference between positive psychology and magical thinking? How can we use positive psychology to make our experience of hope more tangible? And what can we learn from activists and those who refuse to give up? Also, a reminder that hope doesn't have to be about a higher power and Candice's post-election promise to you, no matter who wins.
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The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
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The main feed of the pod is on hold indefinitely, but solo episodes continue rolling out over on Patreon. In this one-off drop, Candice offers a summary of recent content, sharing why she's taking sides in the upcoming U.S. general election and offering perspective re: the cognitive dissonance that reluctant-yet-resigned MAGA voters are likely experiencing in the final weeks leading up to Nov 5th.
New age apostasy - the liberating (and terrifying) feeling of life without dogma; and why 'healing' from moral injuries is never really done.Spiritual high-talk - it's moving into the mainstream & despite the sugar-coated lip service, is it demonstration of true unity? Not so much.The power-player problem - it won't be remedied with whack-a-mole focus on leadership alone; we've got to re-invent the systems that breed them.Is Social Media radicalizing us? - Candice shares how she's been losing agency to the high-demand influence of her smartphone & what she plans to do about it.
And then, politics aside, you'll hear last week's unscripted drop from over on Patreon, where she shares more personally about:
Patrons of The Deeper Pulse have unlimited access to over 70 hours of bonus content in exchange for their support of the podcast. Patreon donations help keep the main feed of this pod ad-free. Sliding-scale membership starts at just $5 month.Referenced In This Episode:
I Will Vote - confirm &/or register to voteWCDHT episode with Dr. Mariel BuquéZadie Smith on The Ezra Klein ShowSupport the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Episodes manquant?
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Right around the time Candice was puzzling over how to wrap the 'cult'ure series, regular contributor Tracy Stamper reached out to ask: Hey, Can I Q Her A? The result is the series finale where Candice responds to a long list of listener questions like: What's it been like carrying on in the face of backlash? How has this project been impactful on a personal level? Were there any unexpected surprises? And what's next? Also: Tracy offers up a somewhat surprising personal revelation. Candice speaks to the personal code of ethics she developed while producing this work. They speak candidly about the appeal of high-arousal states (vs. the maybe-middle ground), then Tracy asks Candice if she's willing to predict what might happen next at ‘the Org.’ Recovery from reflexive people-pleasing is discussed, which leads Candice to an ah-hah around the word "spiritual" and why it's so over-used. When asked about leadership, she gets fired up around outdated definitions and shares why she's made such an effort to ensure the series *not* become another cult-personality led movement. Plus, many other A’s to your Q’s! And be sure to listen to the end; Tracy's final question goes somewhere unexpected and speaks to the very heart of this work.
Thanks for tuning into the 'cult'ure series. If you'd like to keep your finger on The Deeper Pulse, consider joining the growing community over on Patreon where Candice will continue to rollout monthly bonus episodes indefinitely.
Referenced in this episode:
DD#62 - Good Girl’ Intervention (Patreon bonus)But It’s Not A Cult - social media post Shame Persists Because - follow-up rantSolo Episodes referenced - Ep.39 & Ep.40DD#42 - The Tired Goose (Patreon bonus)Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Candice is proud to welcome New York Magazine's Cover Story: Power Trip producers Lily Kay Ross & David Nickles to the pod. Lily & Dave share about the behind the scenes events that led to the 2021 launch of their investigative podcast series and about the backlash they’ve experience researching and reporting on abuse in psychedelic communities. Topics touched upon in this episode include: how trauma shapes our experience of psychedelics, the way in which harm mitigation is often perceived as a threat to 'the movement', and the neoliberal gaslighting of victims. Lily & Dave share why the rush to medicalize psychedelics is problematic, due in part to a lack of credible research when it comes to mental health outcomes, and then remind listeners why it’s important to be cautious when exploring psychedelics in communal and therapeutic settings. The roots of 'psychedelic authoritarianism' are discussed, as well as alternatives for folks who’d like to explore psychedelics without suggestive oversight. Lily speaks to why the word ‘power’ itself can be a red flag and why 'resistance' is something we should celebrate. Dave shares why he loves psychedelics and the political tensions they force us to confront. In what may be the final deep-dive convo of the series, Candice finds solace in the fact that - come hell or high water - people like Lily & Dave are working hard to expose injustice and enable collective change.
New York Magazine - Cover Story: Power Trip The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas, by Ursula K LeGuin
Lily Kay Ross, MDiv, PhD is a journalist, harm reduction advocate, and independent scholar advancing the field of Critical Psychedelic Studies. She’s Creator and Producer of New York magazine’s Cover Story: Power Trip podcast. She’s interested in queer, feminist and neurodivergent perspectives, peer-reviewed research, and science journalism that centers patients and people with lived experience. She has her Masters of Divinity from Harvard, and her PhD in Gender Studies from the University of Otago.
David Nickles is an underground researcher, harm reduction advocate, and journalist. He’s Creator and Producer of New York magazine’s Cover Story: Power Trip podcast. As a forerunner of Critical Psychedelic Studies, his work has focused on the intersection of radical politics and the sociocultural implications of psychoactive substances, research and clinical ethics, and novel phytochemical analysis of psychoactive materials. He is a vocal opponent of psychedelic commodification and blows glass in an idealistic attempt to avoid monetizing his psychedelic work. Dave is the former Managing Editor of Psymposia.
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
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Welcome to the second half of a two-part exposé on the NAR movement in America. Candice continues her conversation with former insider, Nikki G, who shares more about the strategic aims of this belief system and how dominion theology has long been carving out a space in US politics. They touch a bit more on the Heritage Foundation’s presidential playbook (Project 2025), specifically its focus on unitary executive theory; in other words, the doing-away with checks and balances. Then Nikki courageous shares about the years she spent on the front lines of the pro-life movement. She takes us behind the scenes of ‘TheCall’ anti-abortion marches - the red ‘LIFE’ tape she wore, the 12-hour prayer and fasting sessions she attended, and how she believed she was “on the right side of history.” Nikki reveals how her views have since changed, sharing her more nuanced understanding of the right to choose as well as retroactive realizations she's had as a Black cult survivor. Inspired by both personal experiences and professional expertise, Nikki offers TDP listeners some timely advice on how to navigate relationships with friends and loved ones who are under the influence of this radical ideology. The episode wraps with a reminder that knowledge is power. Candice & Nikki don't have a solution to the current political crisis, so they instead share how they are staying informed and taking good care in equal measure.
Politico Article - Christian Nationalism & TrumpThe New Republic - NAR & ‘Political Takeover’Daily Kos - NAR is ’Stalking Democracy’André Gagné - for more on religious violence
Nikki G. is a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who helps survivors recover and thrive after Religious Trauma & Cult involvement. She is also survivor of multiple narcissistic relationships, religious trauma, and several cultic communities. Nikki is the CEO of Nikki G Speaks LLC, which provides survivors with individual coaching, online community, and psychoeducation related to religious trauma, narcissistic abuse, and cult involvement. Nikki is a co-host of the podcast “Surviving the Black Church” where she and her co-hosts delve into conversations regarding religious trauma in the Black Church. She is also the co-founder of The Black Religious Trauma Recovery Network and she sits on the board of directors for Tears of Eden, a non-profit organization that supports survivors who have experienced abuse in the evangelical community. nikkigspeaks.com | @nikki_g_speaks
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
American democracy is hanging on by a thread. But how did we get here? Today's episode offers an insider's peek into Christian nationalism. You may remember Nikki G from Ep.77; she was on the pod back in January, sharing about her work as a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who specializes in spiritual and religious abuse. In early March, Candice invited her to sit down again for this two-part conversation. Nikki is a former devotee in the evangelical movement whose passion at the time was "governmental intercession." In Part 1 of this dialogue, she peels back the curtain on the New Apostolic Reformation (NAR) Movement and how its decades-long perversion of Christianity has infiltrated US politics. Nikki lays out the bones of the movement's history and gives us a feel for what it’s like inside NAR's apostolic hubs, all working in coordination toward the same end-game. She walks us through Lance Wallnau’s 7 Mountain Mandate, a strategic plan to impose religious order on the masses and shamelessly colonize every aspect of American culture. Nikki tells us what it was like, watching evangelical leaders embrace Trump prior to the first election; then she and Candice discuss why he’s actually the ideal point man for the movement. This episode lays a critical foundation for the Heritage Foundation's far-right playbook (Project 2025) and where this conversation will be headed next week, in Part 2.
God & Country - documentaryPower Worshippers, by Katherine StewartConspirituality Episode #187 - Project 2025Mindshift Podcast - Exposing Project 2025
Nikki G. is a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who helps survivors recover and thrive after Religious Trauma & Cult involvement. She is also survivor of multiple narcissistic relationships, religious trauma, and several cultic communities. Nikki is the CEO of Nikki G Speaks LLC, which provides survivors with individual coaching, online community, and psychoeducation related to religious trauma, narcissistic abuse, and cult involvement. Nikki is a co-host of the podcast “Surviving the Black Church” where she and her co-hosts delve into conversations regarding religious trauma in the Black Church. She is also the co-founder of The Black Religious Trauma Recovery Network and she sits on the board of directors for Tears of Eden, a non-profit organization that supports survivors who have experienced abuse in the evangelical community. nikkigspeaks.com | @nikki_g_speaks
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
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Welcome to a brand new chapter in the ‘cult’ure series. We'll be moving away from the wellness world and onto broader culture war topics in the coming weeks. To kick things off, Candice is showing up solo. Opening with an anecdote about an awkward interpersonal interaction from a few weeks ago, she then continues in the vein of storytelling, pulling from the pages of her unpublished memoir. Through a series of intimate flashbacks, she examines how an over’bear’ing family system shaped her people-pleasing persona early in life and what it may have taught her about the social costs of speaking up. The episode then circles back to an early theme in the ‘cult’ure series convo - don’t poke the bear - riffing on how (because patriarchy) social systems reward bullying behavior and sometimes confuse everyday allies with villains. She touches upon some hot-button topics; all the while speaking about why doing so feels so damned edgy - especially in the digital age. Also, she introduces TDP listeners to some of the folks that she's been watching closely in order to learn more about everyday activism, and why she's become a little obsessed with refreshing responses to trolls and haters. Learn what Candice considers 'bully backlash bingo' as well as what her ongoing fascination with whistleblowers has been teaching her. Then (sorry-not-sorry) things get political as she paves the way for where the ‘cult’ure series is headed next.
Robert Jay LiftonJohn Lewis - Good TroubleBrittany Voie & The Wonder Woman videoAlok Vaid-Menon on InstagramOne Way Back: A Memoir, by Christine Blasey FordDoppelganger: A Trip Into The Mirror World, by Naomi Klein
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Beginning next week, we'll be shifting the conversation here on the main feed away from wellness 'cult'ure convos. But first, back in early February, Candice invited Tracy Stamper to record a last-minute release for Patreon, and it soon after became one of this pod's most downloaded bonus episodes to date. Flying monkey is a term popularized in cult recovery spaces. Borrowed from the storyline of the Wizard of Oz, it describes a high-demand group dynamic wherein hardcore loyalists reinforce ideology and allegiance to the group by policing behavior, expression, and dissenting opinions. But the thing is, in the world of new age wellness, flying monkey behavior isn’t always easy to suss out. It often masquerades as concern and/or sugar-coated redirections that are directed toward those who are wavering in their devotion; aka no longer 'all-in.' And in more extreme instances, it can look like victim shaming (see Ep.59). Shrugging off good-girl conditioning, Candice & Tracy share never-told stories about what's been happening behind the scenes, and how dogma placed in service to good intentions can actually do more harm. You'll hear what it's been like fielding ongoing criticism from Org loyalists. They take a critical look at “the high road” - what is it, really?... offer a closer look at 'soft-power coercion'... and also at how gaslighting can get dressed up in holy garb. Also, is there a razor thin line between compassion and complicity? Candice references how the groundbreaking work of Regina Jackson & Saira Roa has been helping her to wake up to her own blindspots and moral complacency. And Tracy reflects on her own flying monkey behavior back in the day, and then offers a compelling counterargument to those who'd rather we STFU because "what about my business?!" Which leads to an in-real-time reality check around why - despite their shared desire to move away from the subject - they're still talking about the Org. (Can we be done now, pretty please?!)
Bounded Choice: Who Is Accountable? w/ Dr. Janja LalichWhite Women: Everything You Already Know About Your Own Racism and How to Do Better, by Regina Jackson & Saira RoaDeconstructing Karen - Apple TV documentary
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Welcome to another Patreon Sampler. Over a dozen conversations have dropped while Candice has been on break from the main feed (that's here), and there are currently 60+ ‘cult’ure series related bonus episodes now streaming over on Patreon. Episode #78 features some of the best moments from recent releases.
Aimee Van Ausdall shares about her very-public exit from ‘the Org’, how she's been standing up to bullies her whole life, and a tough-love reality check for those still straddling. Also, her plus-sized perspective on recent diet 'cult'ure convos. (From DD#57 - Leaving Loudly: Bullies, Paper Tigers, & A Size Stigma Reality Check - total run time: 53min over on Patreon)Dr. Melissa Durfey joins Candice to share about firsthand experience with medical fat-phobia, how intuitive wellness saved her life, and why self-care is so important. (From DD#53 - Surviving Anti-Fat Bias & Discovering Intuitive Wellness - total run time: 60min on Patreon)Sara Avery speaks candidly about growing up fat, her commitment to volunteer activism, and what 'allyship' really means to her. (From DD#56 - What My Body Is For: Self-Acceptance & Embodied Activism - total run time: 66m on Patreon)
Listen to excerpts from recent discussions:
On activism, diet 'cult'ure, & self-care >>On what it takes to call out legacies of abuse >>
Noa Kadman shares how she spent years devoted to a yoga-inspired dance modality that was created by two former 'Org' trainers; only to suffer moral injury and betrayal. (From DD#55 - ‘Spiritual’ Self-Sacrifice: A Cautionary Tale & Cult-Hopping Heads Up! - total run time: 1hr, 47m on Patreon)Whistleblower Update - Candice shares about recent pushback to this here pod, how Naomi Klein's book Doppelganger: A Trip into the Mirror World is helping her to understand the polarizing times we're living in, and where the ‘cult’ure series is headed next. (From STC 3/14/24 - The Bully Pulpit: A Whistleblower Reality Check & Naomi Klein’s 'The Mirror World' - total run time: 38m on Patreon)If you would like to hear full-length conversations of these and 60+ other episodes, consider becoming a patron of the pod for as little as $5 a month. Patreon donations keep the podcast editorially independent and ad-free. A free 7-day trial is available to all new subscribers.
Learn more at patreon.com/thedeeperpulse.Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
This week’s Patreon Preview features an excerpt from a solo episode in the Subject To Change series with Candice, released exclusively on TDP Patreon. The following clip is from a 47-minute episode entitled Spiritual Capitalism: The Trouble w/ Turning Meaning Into Money.
If you like what you hear in this sample clip, you can access the full-length episode on Patreon - which touches upon the following topics:
An important reminder not to weaponize 'cult'ure series content.Spiritual Capitalism; the monetized rebellion against self-sacrifice.Idealism, misinformation, & exchanging meaning for money.Spiritual Meritocracy; a love&light spin on a capitalistic lie.Is 'spiritual' really even something that we can be?Soft-power coercion in marketing & what to look out for.Reality check re: the social determinants of health AND well-being.Patrons of The Deeper Pulse have unlimited access to weekly extras in exchange for their support of the podcast. Patreon donations help keep the main feed of this pod ad-free. Sliding-scale membership starts at just $5 month.
Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
January is Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month, and this week Candice welcomes a very special guest. Nikki G is a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, co-host of the Surviving The Black Church podcast, and a vocal advocate for spiritual and religious abuse survivors. Nikki shares briefly about her personal history growing up in a narcissistic family system, time spent in five different cults, and her personal path of healing. She speaks about the subtle yet sometimes critical difference between spiritual and religious trauma, then offers guidance around how best to seek support and healing. Nikki generously walks us through a brief history of The Black Church, speaking to how intergenerational trauma must be a consideration when supporting Black folks who are recovering from spiritual and religious abuse. The term ‘church hurt’ is discussed; specifically how in Black Communities, when applied too broadly, it leads to the glorification of suffering and implicitly encourages abuse survivors to stay-put and endure. Candice shares suffer-in-silence parallels in the wellness world, and the two discuss how even though the gaslighting shows up differently, it ultimately results in a similar outcome - spiritual bypassing and a disconnection from self. Nikki speaks to the many invisible wounds folks grapple with upon exiting a high-demand religion or spiritual community and then describes what post-cult ‘rehab’ might look like. She shares how coming home to her body has been so pivotal in her healing process; and Candice asks for Nikki’s input on the unique challenge of healing from trauma that occurs within the space of an embodiment practice. The episode wraps with a teaser into another upcoming convo with Nikki that will be recorded later this month, focusing on how religious ideologies have been systematically shaping American politics for decades. This is a rich conversation; be sure to listen to the end!
Surviving The Black Church PodcastThe Black Religious Trauma Recovery NetworkTears of Eden
Nikki G. is a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who helps survivors recover and thrive after Religious Trauma & Cult involvement. She is also survivor of multiple narcissistic relationships, religious trauma, and several cultic communities. Nikki is the CEO of Nikki G Speaks LLC, which provides survivors with individual coaching, online community, and psychoeducation related to religious trauma, narcissistic abuse, and cult involvement. Nikki is a co-host of the podcast “Surviving the Black Church” where she and her co-hosts delve into conversations regarding religious trauma in the Black Church. She is also the co-founder of The Black Religious Trauma Recovery Network and she sits on the board of directors for Tears of Eden, a non-profit organization that supports survivors who have experienced abuse in the evangelical community. Web: nikkigspeaks.com | IG: @nikki_g_speaks
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
This week, we’re keeping our finger on the pulse of diet ‘cult’ure. Our guest is a former affiliate of 'the Org' and a valued contributor in the Deconstructing Dogma series over on Patreon. Susan McCulley recently joined Candice for heart-to-heart, and we’re sharing the first half of the convo here on the main feed. In 2016, Susan wrote a powerful essay about the double-life she was living as a holistic fitness instructor touting ‘body love’ who was secretly struggling with body acceptance and a lifetime of disordered eating. You’ll hear Susan read excerpts from this remarkable and revealing piece where she shares 'snapshots' from her life in a body - ie. the calorie book she discovered at 10 years old & why even as a grown-ass woman she didn’t think to fire her “shitty shitty doctor.” She & Candice discuss the subtle-yet-critical differences between restriction and genuine self-care, how shame and perfectionism keep us from normalizing body image struggles, and the lip service they each gave (but didn't fully embody) while teaching the 'Org' practice. Candice reveals how she’s actively shifting the language she uses in her classes, and Susan offers up the personal mantra she now uses when she catches herself judging/comparing bodies. The two get real about day-to-day capacity when it comes to challenging diet-culture norms, and then reference the work of Kate Manne and a radical reframe they both love - body reflexivity. Finally, and paving the way for conversations that will drop later in the series, Susan shares a few ways that she is using her thin privilege to actively support folks living in larger bodies.
Susan McCulley has been a mindful movement leader, artist, and writer since 2000. She is the creator of The Age of Becoming: Embodied Practices Empowering Women over 50 community which offers free movement practices & workshops, connection & community and more. Her 30-Lesson audio course, Building Balance in Your Body & Life was published on the Insight Timer meditation app in early 2022. She has two illustrated books, Buddha Cat: Learning Awareness, Presence & Self-Care from a Teacher Who Sometimes Barfs on the Bed and Octabusy: Letting Go in a Sea of Doing. Her teaching schedule, classes, books and art are available at susanmcculley.com.
Susan's Blog PostJoin Patreon to hear Part 2 with SusanYou Can't Fight Misogyny Without Fighting Fat Phobia - The Burnt Toast PodcastUnshrinking: How to Face Fatphobia, by Kate Manne
Referenced In This Episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Deconstructing Dogma is a video bonus series hosted exclusively on Patreon. Patrons of The Deeper Pulse have unlimited access to these weekly extras in exchange for their support of the podcast. Patreon donations help keep the main feed of this pod ad-free.
This week’s Patreon Preview features excerpts from DD #50 with Stacy Parish. Stacy was on the main feed back in March 2023, and she's back to share about how complex trauma shaped her culty experiences - as well as her ability to recognize the warning signs before wading in too deep.Content Warning >> This episode includes reference to sexual trauma, familial gaslighting, and emotional abuse.
Stacy shares how she got involved with the Org & why she chose to step away after completing her second level of training.She reveals what it was like stepping into the practice as a sexual trauma survivor; how the practice felt like a godsend that gifted her "a birthright that I'd been robbed of."She opens up about how, even as a teacher on 'the fringe' she experienced red flags; sharing examples.
In the full-length episode over on Patreon:And then, she bravely shares about her family of origin & how it may have shaped her susceptibility to gaslighting and undue influence:
You'll learn about the since-disbanded False Memory Syndrome Foundation, their VERY troubling history (read more about it here), and the gaslighting that Stacy endured as a result of a systemic campaign to silence victims of childhood sexual abuse.Stacy tells us what it was like being gaslit by her parents & how/why psychological survival meant normalizing the tension of two painfully opposing truths.She reveals how her original wounds may have inspired her to incessantly seek out surrogate family & a sense of safety and belonging. And we discuss how common this yearning can be.And finally, Stacy shares:
How art and storytelling has helped her to liberate her voice.What it's been like for her to step into the spotlight & live her truth out loud.Stacy Parish has a BS degree in art education from Minnesota State University, Mankato and spent 11 years in broadcasting — as a professional disc jockey, voice talent and copywriter. She has been professionally involved in education and communication for almost years. A born storyteller, her popular podcast “Full Spirals” brings together two of her passions: using her voice as a vehicle for change and promoting the arts as tools for healing. A working local artist, she is also employed in the paint and sip industry as an artist, and her original paintings have been taught to tens of thousands of people nationwide. fullspirals.com | @boomstacy
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The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
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We’re back with the second half of our conversation with Tara Wike. (If you missed Part 1, you'll wanna circle back and start there). In the lead-in, Candice reads from listener comments & lays the foundation for Part 2. Picking up where we left off last week, Tara shares how changing her ‘visual diet’ is expanding her definition of beauty; and also, the culty collateral damage done when we critique our bodies publicly. This leads into a discussion around mixed messages at ‘the Org’ and how - despite loads of lip service - practitioners are in no way immune to the influence of diet culture; then Tara highlights how generational differences around body acceptance may be at play. The social determinants of health are discussed, as well as the danger of insisting that wellness is in all cases ‘an inside job’ — especially when systemic barriers and biases are so prevalent. Tracy asks us to take a critical look at ‘emotional eating’ — is this always a bad thing? (Spoiler: not so much.) And then Tara shares how recovery from a brain injury revealed to her the insidiousness of diet culture. We touch upon the body positivity and body neutrality movements, and then Tara shares how she’s doing her part to try and shift attitudes within her own social spheres. This is an important episode in the series line-up; one that you won’t want to miss!
Dear Sugars Podcast | Ep: Trust Your Body with Dana Sturtevant & Hilary KinaveyMaintenance Phase Podcast w/ Aubrey Gordon & Michael HobbesDieting Does Not Work, UCLA Researchers ReportAubrey Gordon on WCDHT PodcastFood Psych Podcast w/ Christy Harrison
Tara Wike (she/her) is an American expat living in Denmark with her husband and son. She is a leader in the design organization at The LEGO Group, and moonlights teaching Org-inspired movement classes, having recently left the Org after decades of practice. In both work and private life, Tara is passionate about creating inclusive products and experiences. Her recent recovery from disordered eating has inspired her to actively support body diversity and fight anti-fat bias, both in fitness spaces and in the broader culture.
LINKS:Also referenced in this episode:
Fearing the Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia, book by Sabrina StringsAnti-Diet: Reclaim Your Time, Money, Well-Being, and Happiness Through Intuitive Eating, book by Christy HarrisonConspirituality: How New Age Conspiracy Theories Became a Health Threat, book by Derek Beres, Matthew Remski, & Julian WalkerThe Wellness Trap: Break Free from Diet Culture, Disinformation, and Dubious Diagnoses, and Find Your True Well-Being, book by Christy HarrisonSupport the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Plans have changed and the ‘cult’ure series isn’t wrapping just yet! Back after another long break, Candice shares why she’s decided to keep at it; then she lays the foundation for this week’s convo. Originally recorded as a Patreon bonus, Candice and wingwoman, Tracy Stamper, welcome special guest Tara Wike to the pod for a two-part deconstruction of diet ‘cult’ure. In Part 1, Tara shares a bit about her personal background, time spent teaching and training with ‘the Org,’ and the wake-up call that led her into a path of recovery around disordered eating. Topics discussed include: healthism, orthorexia, intuitive eating, how systemic biases shape definitions of 'health', and how Tara is now bringing a Health At Every Size (HAES) approach to her personal and professional endeavors. And stick around to the end, because Tara’s wisdom is timely. Candice expresses some in-real-time raw emotion, sharing a peek into her own disordered eating and revealing how Tara’s honesty & openness has been a real wake-up call. Part 2 drops next week.
Isabel Foxen DukeDear Sugars Podcast | Ep: Trust Your BodyThe Center for Body TrustASDAH - Health at Every Size (HAES)Diet Culture & Body Image - The Renfrew CenterWhy You Gain Belly Fat After Menopause (& Why It's Ok)
Tara Wike (she/her) is an American expat living in Denmark with her husband and son. She is a leader in the design organization at The LEGO Group, and moonlights teaching Org-inspired movement classes, having recently left the Org after decades of practice. In both work and private life, Tara is passionate about creating inclusive products and experiences. Her recent recovery from disordered eating has inspired her to actively support body diversity and fight anti-fat bias, both in fitness spaces and in the broader culture.
LINKS:Also referenced in this episode:
We Have to Stop Thinking of Being ‘Healthy’ as Being Morally Better, Aubrey GordonThe Body Is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love, Sonya Renee TaylorConspirituality: How New Age Conspiracy Theories Became a Health Threat, Beres, Remski, & WalkerHealth At Every Size: The Surprising Truth About Your Weight, Lindo BaconIntuitive Eating, A Revolutionary Anti-Diet Approach, Elyse Resch and Evelyn TriboleSupport the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
The 'cult'ure series is scheduled to wrap next week. In the meantime, here's another Patreon Sampler & sneak peek at the Deconstructing Dogma bonus series that will be streaming through the new year over on Patreon. There are currently 40+ bonus episodes available to patrons of the pod, and this sampler features some of our favorite moments from recent releases.
Frenemies: The Not-So-Fringe Reality, where Candice & Tracy unpack how top-down power dynamics have seemingly spread into 'Org' communities worldwide.Spirit Barbie: The Performance of Wellness - a one-hour deconstruction of the how we are socially conditioned to present ourselves in the world of wellness; ie. 'high talk', dieting, and detox culture.Maria Skinner once again joins Candice & Tracy, this time to take a critical look at The Law of Attraction. We trade personal stories and talk 'manifestation', channeling, and mindset vs. magical thinking. Intimacy vs. Intensity - Candice shares about the helpful advice she once received from a therapist who was well-versed in relational dynamics at 'the Org.' She & Tracy unpack it a bit, then chat about the forced intimacy that is so often created in wellness training environments.Adi Goren returns for a bonus convo, this time to to deconstruct The Economy of 'the Org.' Adi invites us to examine how the business model of the company is a feudal system where the many work in service to those at the top; then we talk free labor and the challenges of moving on after leaving.
In this Patreon Sampler, you'll hear excerpts from:If you want more of what this episode has to offer, consider becoming a patron of the pod for as little as $5 a month. Patreon donations keep the podcast ad-free. If you're interested in learning more, visit patreon.com/thedeeperpulse.
Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
Welcome to the second half of our two-part conversation with Adi Goren (recorded back in August). If you missed Part 1, you’re gonna want to circle back, because we’re picking up right where we left off! Last week, Adi shared a bit about her personal life, how she first discovered ‘the Org’, and her subsequent devotion to the practice. Part 2 opens as Adi reveals more about her relationship to ‘the Org’ CEO; how she saw him as a ‘father figure’ and how he groomed her for a role within the company. She shares what it was like working remotely from her home in Israel, fielding calls while trying to overlook the many red flags - ie: love bombing, high employee turnover, and teachers regularly calling in with worrisome requests. And then Adi bravely tells Tracy & I about the staff meeting that shattered her faith in the business and its leadership once and for all; sharing about the moment when she challenged the Org CEO, appalled by his dehumanizing rhetoric. Unsure of how to transition away from the work she’d structured her entire life around, Adi held onto her job for another few months before being fired unjustly. She expresses what it was like stepping away; how she was sick with grief and how her classes doubled in size once she was no longer devoting all of her precious life force to someone else’s bottomline. Adi speaks candidly about what she’s learned from her experiences with the Org. She talks boundaries, and why she thinks she was personally vulnerable to exploitation and power-over abuse. Then, the three speak about how collective trauma may factor into: why so many women gravitate toward the practice; why the vehicle of movement is so damn potent; and what happens when ‘joy’ becomes an addictive and dissociative escape. Coming together in collective cult recovery, we seek to answer to the question - how do we heal from moral injury and reclaim a sense of autonomy (and agency) over our bodies and our lives?
Adi Goren is a former Org affiliate and experienced movement teacher who is developing what she and her community know as The Architecture of Movement. She manages a dance dojo in Israel, offering classes, workshops, and retreats in Israel and abroad. Adi qualified as an architect from the University of Cape Town, South Africa, where she lived for 18 years. She is also a single parent and has been studying the practice of Aikido since 2010.Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
The ‘cult’ure series is set to wrap in a few short weeks at which time main feed podcast production will be on hold indefinitely. But first, we have a final conversation to share with you. Back in August, Candice and good friend / wing woman, Tracy Stamper, sat down with former Org affiliate Adi Goren, who joined the pod from her home in Israel. This lengthy conversation was recorded prior to the unfolding crisis; as such, the intro to the episode, Candice speaks briefly to the unintended-yet-timely nature of this episode’s release. About 15 minutes in, Adi is introduced, and Tracy & Candice listen in as she bravely offers the first half of her story - sharing what it was like growing up in Israel and South Africa; about her early adult life a wife, mother, and an architect; and how it is she came to discover ‘the Org.’ Adi chose to devote herself to the business and the practice, saying in her own words: "My name and the Org became synonymous. And it was my identity." For years, Adi taught classes, produced events, and helped to build a thriving Org community in Israel. After a few glorious years, things got complicated, thanks in part to the ‘producer program’ and communal discord resulting from a lack of integrity, leadership, and guidance at the top. Adi speaks candidly about her own confusion and about what she felt to be a threat to her very livelihood. She describes how, in early 2010, she reached out to the Org’s founder to request mediation and support only to be publicly shamed. Adi opens up about the understandable humiliation she felt and what happened when the Org CEO came to Israel to offer his support. It was the beginning of a pivotal relationship that would ultimately shape Adi’s future with the company. The episode wraps with a disturbing revelation that left both Tracy & Candice slack-jawed.
Adi Goren is a former Org affiliate and experienced movement teacher who is developing what she and her community know as The Architecture of Movement. She manages a dance dojo in Israel, offering classes, workshops, and retreats in Israel and abroad. Adi qualified as an architect from the University of Cape Town, South Africa, where she lived for 18 years. She is also a single parent and has been studying the practice of Aikido since 2010.Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
This week’s ‘cult’ure series release is a very special rollover from the Patreon-exclusive deconstructing dogma bonus series. Three former ‘Org’ affiliates join Candice for a panel discussion examining wellness-cult dynamics through the intersectional lens of gender and sexuality. Together they explore how mainstream socialization around the heteronormative gender binary is very often reinforced in spirituality and wellness spaces. In this conversation, LGBTQ+ perspectives are centered as guests share about their personal & professional experiences. Lainie invites us to look closely at language, and at how terms like 'masculine' & 'feminine' reinforce problematic stereotypes; and she shares briefly about her experience on the Org’s short-lived DEI Counsel. Troy initiates a discussion about why the Org's clothing line was/is so problematic and opens up about how an unwillingness to 'dress the part' - both literally and interpersonally - can limit professional advancement. Maxx speaks to how pressures around gender expression started way back in childhood and were reinforced in wellness spaces; and he celebrates younger generations who are providing to language for his long-lived life experiences. We chat about how capitalism factors into systemic reinforcement of the gender binary and then share some full-belly laughs during a lively (and very revealing) discussion about homoerotic energy on the dance floor. What's that about really? This is an episode not to be missed.
Maxx Boyd is non binary, trans masculine, happily married, and a longtime friend. He was involved with the Org for roughly a decade, subbing for the Org's founders, while also teaching ongoing classes throughout the Portland metro area. Maxx still leads dance fitness classes and has since allowed their own teaching to evolve into something unique and self-defined. Maxx is also a non practicing LMT and part time customer service manager. But he spends most of his days lovingly looking after an active and playful toddler.
Troy McCall licensed with the Org in 2001 and was a devoted teacher and student for many years, teaching in a variety of locations worldwide. T separated from the practice in 2011 and is now a soccer player and coach in Boulder, Colorado. Troy also dances and performs with Streetside Dance and with NewBreed Dance Company and is studying Sport Analytics and Management at American University. T holds multiple master's degrees in Contemporary Performance, Buddhist Studies, and Soccer Coaching.
Lainie Magidsohn is queer, polyamorous, and a lifelong dancer and mover. She's a choreographer, collaborator, improviser, and teacher who is passionate about creating a safe space for movers of all ages, abilities, bodies, and genders to engage with their own unique dance. Lainie was involved with the Org for two decades and was also a part of the Org's short-lived Diversity, Equity & Inclusion Council, that was formed in the aftermath of the George Floyd murder and was disbanded less than two years later. Lainie is also a parent, a wedding officiant, a life drawing model, and an instructor with Dancing with Parkinsons in Toronto and across Canada online.Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. -
This week, Candice welcomes Priscilla Eyles for a discussion on intersectional cult recovery. Priscilla, who comes to us from the UK, is a DEI/JEDI consultant who shares about their time spent in two different cults: Landmark, an LGAT offshoot of est, and OneTaste, a wellness organization that is currently under FBI investigation for sexual exploitation and forced labor practices. When Priscilla stepped away and began grappling with their back-to-back cult experiences, they immediately noticed how cult recovery spaces often overlook the perspectives of marginalized folks. As a neurodiverse, racialized, queer cult survivor, they have since become an intersectional anti-cult activist/advocate who centers the perspectives of multiply-marginalized survivors. Priscilla generously agreed to join the pod to help Candice and TDP listeners better understand how to respectfully platform marginalized voices - without being tokenistic or extractive. Priscilla speaks candidly about their own neurodiversity, how multiple marginalizations can complicate the process of cult recovery, and why culty groups can be so attractive to those who have been systematically marginalized. Victim blaming is once again discussed, only this time from an intersectional perspective. This is an eye-opening conversation, and a reminder than there really is no such thing as homogenous cult survivorship.
The Equality House - Topeka, KSBBC Interview - Me, my autism and cultsEvvie Orman - YouTubeOrgasm, Inc. - Netflix
Priscilla Eyles (she/her, they/them) is passionate about enabling the social acceptance of multiply marginalized neurodivergent (ND) people and cult survivors like themselves, as well as increasing understanding of the great value of lived experience wisdom and the importance of trauma-informed approaches. As a cult survivor who is a biracial, ADHD/autistic (AuDHD), queer femme/AFAB (assigned female at birth), they are equally passionate about normalizing conversations around cult abuse and foregrounding how cults can prey on and retraumatize people like them. Priscilla was formerly a Project Coordinator managing an intersectional disability project and is a DEI/JEDI trainer and consultant specializing in neurodivergence in the workplace. with Resolve Evolve, who has trained in DEI practice with the Sarah Jane Academy. As an intersectional ND & cult awareness advocate & activist, she has spoken at various major panel/campaign events and written for numerous publications/organizations as a freelance writer.
Twitter: @PriscillaEyles | Insta: @CulturalLiasons | Email: [email protected]
Referenced in this episode:Support the show
The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization.
Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates. - Montre plus
