Episodes
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In this recent episode of "The Spectrum Report," host Gabriel Williams engages in a thought-provoking discussion with licensed marriage and family therapist Stephanie Winn. Host of the podcast âSome Kind of Therapistâ. This episode, essential for any parent considering therapy for their child, delves into the intricate connection between autism and gender dysphoria, as well as the crucial process of selecting the right therapist for one's family.
Stephanie Winn, who brings a wealth of experience from her extensive work across California and Oregon, shared her professional journey and insights into the complex interplay of autism, gender dysphoria, and therapy. With her expertise in treating diverse conditions such as psychosis, complex trauma, and high-risk adolescents, Winn provided valuable advice on identifying a competent therapist who can truly understand and meet a family's unique needs.
The discussion covered a range of vital topics, including the potential overlaps between gender dysphoria and autism. Winnâs approach emphasizes the importance of a nuanced understanding of each patient's experiences, pushing beyond the standard protocols to tailor treatments that respect the individual complexities of those on the autism spectrum.
For families navigating these challenging waters, Winn's insights are particularly invaluable. She stressed the significance of therapists who not only possess the right credentials but also embody empathy, flexibility, and a deep commitment to understanding and addressing the specific issues faced by todayâs children.
This episode serves as a crucial resource for parents and caregivers. It highlights the importance of comprehensive care approaches that acknowledge the full spectrum of an individual's identity and experiences. As our understanding of autism and gender dysphoria continues to evolve, conversations like these are essential in guiding families towards supportive, effective therapy options.
Listeners are encouraged to engage with the episode in full to benefit from Stephanie Winn's expertise and to explore the detailed resources mentioned for further support. "The Spectrum Report" continues to be an indispensable tool for those seeking informed, compassionate perspectives on autism and related therapies.
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As a parent, navigating the complex landscape of gender issues with your childrenâwhether they're on the autism spectrum or notâcan feel like traversing a minefield. It's a topic that's as sensitive as it is critical, demanding a nuanced and informed approach. That's why this interview with Pamela Garfield-Jaeger, LCSW, MS, is one you shouldn't miss. Pamela brings over two decades of experience in social work to the table, along with insights from her new book, "A Practical Response to Gender Distress - Tips and Tools for Families".
Our conversation will delve into topics that are both eye-opening and vital for every parent to understand. We'll explore the troubling concept of emotional blackmail, learn how to recognize the signs of a gender critical therapist, and discuss whether gender dysphoria can be seen as a social contagion. Additionally, Pamela will share her expertise on identifying if your child may be influenced by social activists and offer advice on screening therapists to ensure they equip your child with resilience rather than a victim mentality.
Pamela's journey has been both professional and personal. After leaving her profession in 2017 due to a severe disability, she returned in 2021 to find the mental health field significantly transformed, especially concerning the treatment of gender dysphoric patients. Her experience in a teen clinic in San Mateo County, California, where 3 out of 10 kids identified as transâall girlsâwas startling compared to her extensive background with vulnerable youth. This contrast propelled her to speak out and offer guidance through 1:1 consultations for parents and her book.
"A Practical Response to Gender Distress" is designed to support families grappling with gender issues. It provides an alternative perspective to "gender affirmative care" and includes powerful artwork by detransitioners, a 'trans/english' dictionary, and a comprehensive resource list. The book is available for purchase on Amazon here.
To further support and educate parents, Pamela is active on several platforms. You can follow her on Instagram at @the.truthfultherapist, on Twitter @truththerapist, subscribe to her insights on Substack, watch her content on YouTube, and visit her website at www.thetruthfultherapist.org.
This interview promises to be enlightening, offering parents the knowledge and tools needed to navigate gender issues thoughtfully and effectively. Whether you're looking for guidance on starting conversations about gender with your adolescent, seeking to empower yourself to question professionals, or simply wishing to gain a deeper understanding of the subject, join us for this crucial discussion.
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Episodes manquant?
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Join us for an extraordinary episode as we delve into the world of autism and discover the transformative power of early intervention, the significance of community and support for autism families, and the untapped potential of individuals on the Spectrum.
Our special guest, Eustacia Cutler, renowned as Temple Grandin's mother, will share her invaluable insights and experiences, shedding light on the journey of raising a child with autism. Prepare to be inspired as we explore the profound impact of pushing boundaries and stretching limits to unlock the full potential of individuals on the Spectrum.
Discover how embracing this approach can help them realize their true capabilities and become the best versions of themselves. But that's not all! Stick around until the end of the show for an exciting opportunity to engage directly with Eustacia Cutler. Through our live chat feature, you can pose your burning questions, and Eustacia will personally answer them, providing valuable advice and guidance.
Don't miss out on this remarkable episode!
Like, follow, watch, and share to ensure others benefit from this enlightening discussion. You can also leave your questions right here in the comments section.
Together, let's create a supportive community and empower individuals with autism to thrive!
Our sponsor's website: https://www.neuralbalance.com/pages/how
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Join us as we talk to returning guest Jennifer Giustra-Kozek, LPC about this study and ask her the question that is on all of our minds; Will this new study change the way depression is treated moving forward?
For more information about Jennifer Kozek and her award winning books and other resources: https://www.healingwithouthurting.com/
Our Facebook Support Group: www.facebook.com/groups/neuralbalancesupport Our YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/c/TheSpectrumReportTV
A message from Jennifer: I'm beyond excited to share a unique opportunity for each and every one of you to take your wellness and mental health understanding to another level by registering for a course I will be teaching online this September! Offered through IPAK-EDU, the course is entitled Integrative Wellness for Mental Health and it runs every Tuesday at 7PM EST for 15 weeks starting September 6th all for only $12 per class! Can't fit the Tuesday night classes into your schedule? No problem at all! All 15 classes will be available for you to complete at your own pace and on your schedule, plus you will have full access to class message board where I will be available to answer your questions and provide further clarity on all course material. https://ipak-edu.org/integrative-wellness-for-mental-health/ Here is a full rundown of what you can expect from the online workshop: Learn the latest research on nutritional deficiencies and the link to neurodevelopmental delays and mental health disorders. In addition, I will provide you with gut healing protocols and strategies to heal intestinal permeability for those who have ADHD, Autism, ODD, and Anxiety. Walk away with a highly effective nutritional and integrative treatment plan, including: Assess nutritional deficiencies that contribute to neurological dysfunction, neurodevelopmental delays, and mental health disorders. Brain/Gut healing protocols and how to heal intestinal permeability. Addressing other underlying conditions contributing to mental health disorders. Provide a menu of non-medication treatment options. Plus a deeper understanding of: developmental disorders/delays, behavioral concerns/ aggression, emotional dysregulation, sensory issues, inattention, hyperactivity, impulsivity, sleep disturbances and more! Using my candid experiences as both a mother and a mental health professional, I will provide you with non-pharmaceutical solutions to implement tomorrow. LEARNING OBJECTIVES: Describe the link between our emotions and our intestinal system. Explore gut healing protocols and how to heal intestinal permeability. Assess for nutritional deficiencies that contribute to neurological dysfunction. Summarize the most recent research in the area of genetic vulnerabilities. Demonstrate how many symptoms can be remedied with nutritional balancing. Discuss how food-sensitivities can contribute to behavioral symptoms and how "special diets" can be highly beneficial. Explain the link between ADHD and autism; processed food, heavy metal, and environmental chemicals. Incorporate Eastern Medicine & and bodywork practices and therapies. Design and implement individualized nutrition and integrative treatment plan. WHO IS THIS COURSE BEST FOR? Parents ⢠Counselors ⢠Psychotherapists ⢠Psychologists ⢠Social Workers ⢠Marriage & Family Therapists ⢠Health Coaches ⢠Life Coaches ⢠Speech-Language Pathologists ⢠Occupational Therapists ⢠Occupational Therapy Assistants ⢠Physical Therapists ⢠Physical Therapist Assistants ⢠Educators ⢠School Counselors ⢠School Psychologists ⢠School Social Workers ⢠School Administrators⢠Intervention Specialists ⢠Behavioral Specialists ⢠Teachers ⢠Educational Paraprofessionals ⢠Nurses ⢠Nutritionists ⢠Other helping professionals who work in the mental health field. Don't miss this rare opportunity to learn directly from me! And if you have any questions before signing up, send me a quick email to: [email protected]
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Join my guest Jennifer Kozek as we talk about depression in younger kids and teens: How to recognize the warning signs and what to do about it.
Masks and mandates and the first installment of Fauci's Follies.
Link to our sponsor Neural Balance: www.neuralbalance.com/pages/reviews-calm-focus-sleep
For more information about Jennifer Kosek and her award winning books and other resources: https://www.healingwithouthurting.com/
Our Facebook Support Group: www.facebook.com/groups/neuralbalancesupport
Our Facebook page: www.facebook.com/neuralbalance
Our YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/c/TheSpectrumReportTV
Don't forget to subscribe to our uncensored Rumble channel to be alerted when we post new content. https://rumble.com/c/c-1160531
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Unknown
We have a great show today, we're going to talk about depression in teens and kids and how it's become more prevalent. We're going to talk about how parents can recognize it and what they can do about it. We want to help those kids any way we can, so stick around.00;00;17;03 - 00;00;56;06
Unknown
I think you'll really enjoy this show and of course, stick around to the end as we talk a little bit with our uncensored exclusive content forces follies. Thank you for joining us for the inaugural edition of the Spectrum report uncensored.00;00;56;07 - 00;01;07;05
Unknown
There's a lot of stuff that we like to talk about that we're just not allowed to talk about on regular social media platforms. Other people do it. I don't know how they get away with it, but you see it every day.00;01;07;05 - 00;01;30;20
Unknown
People are censored, their social media gets shut down, their advertising accounts are close. We can't afford to have that happen to us. So we started this new show, the Spectrum Report Uncensored, and it's exclusively on Rumble. So if you are watching us today, make sure you subscribe to our channel so you'll be notified when we're putting out00;01;30;20 - 00;01;55;12
Unknown
new content. OK, so today's guest is Jennifer Kosek. She's a mother, wife, board certified psychotherapist and internationally recognized blogger, advocate and national speaker. Jennifer has seen the anxiety and the autism epidemic unfold in her private practice and has watched the harmful impact of medication on many young clients.00;01;55;26 - 00;02;23;16
Unknown
The ADHD epidemic turned personal when Jennifer's son was diagnosed. She plunged into the world of safe and natural healing modalities outside of the pharmaceutical model. She is the author of a five time award winning book, Healing Without Hurting Treating ADHD, Aproxia and Autism Spectrum Disorders Naturally and effectively without harmful medication, and has also released a children's00;02;23;16 - 00;02;50;10
Unknown
book, A Healthy New Me and ADHD Free. She's also been featured in the Heal documentary, on many podcasts, news stories, and her articles appear in many publications. Jennifer consults and blogs with thousands of moms through social media to teach them about alternative and natural solutions to receive more info on how you and your family can overcome ADHD00;02;50;10 - 00;03;08;19
Unknown
Aproxia, or anxiety and more without medication, you can visit Jennifer's website. There's also a link there to the Heal documentary, and we'll put a link there in the description of the video. So without further ado, I would like to welcome Jennifer to the show.00;03;09;05 - 00;03;23;03
Unknown
Jennifer, thank you for being here. You're welcome. Thanks for having me. It's always a pleasure. I think this is your third time. We had you on before to talk about each of your books. You're always a great guest, great information.00;03;23;03 - 00;03;38;02
Unknown
And today's show is something that has it's been weighing on my heart as I have a teenager, you know, his friends, the talk and things that we see in the news. So we I definitely appreciate you being here.00;03;38;10 - 00;03;52;23
Unknown
Anything new in the works or anything you want to tell us about before we get started? Yeah, not really. I mean, I've been continuing my blogging, my Healing without Hurting Page. I try to write articles, updates, things that are going on, but that's pretty much it.00;03;52;23 - 00;04;12;28
Unknown
I always talk about wanting to do another book, but maybe when things kind of calm down and my therapy practice has been really, really crazy. And I guess that's why you had me on today because of the amount of teenagers, actually, that I'm starting to see in my psychotherapy practice and sadder and sadder cases of kids that00;04;12;28 - 00;04;34;00
Unknown
are literally, you know, very, very depressed and very anxious. And there's it's it's exploding. And actually, yeah, and that's one of the reasons why we want to talk to the last year and a half has been hard on everybody, but we have a tendency to sometimes forget about how this stuff impacts our kids.00;04;34;00 - 00;04;57;14
Unknown
They hear us worried their lockdown, their school disruption changes. one of the things that I've pointed out recently is there are kids that, you know, they went to school in eighth grade. They went on spring break. Now they they didn't come back to school until they're in high school and in many of them started the school year00;04;57;14 - 00;05;15;27
Unknown
, their first year of high school. Virtually, you had seniors who missed out on all the great milestones that we all look forward to, the reason you worked so hard to get that, you know, high school diploma, your senior year prom, homecoming graduation, all that they really missed out on a lot of stuff.00;05;15;27 - 00;05;37;04
Unknown
So it's resulted in greater depression, anxiety, panic, all you know, all kinds of adverse effects have been noted to teens and even small children who typically didn't have to struggle with all of these things before. So there's definitely been an increase in how has that affected?00;05;37;04 - 00;05;48;21
Unknown
What have you seen as a result of this last year and a half? Well, you know, I see it first with my own kids because my kids, 13 and 15, my son just started high school. They lost, they lost.00;05;48;21 - 00;06;07;26
Unknown
He lost the whole year and a half of his junior high middle school experience. He is my son who is on the spectrum, and he had even a harder time because he, you know, basically we had to hire a tutor to help him with academically because he didn't have a paraprofessionals and other support team around him.00;06;07;26 - 00;06;28;23
Unknown
And he also, you know, he just, you know, socially, he's a social kid and for a year and a half. So I was watching this on my own, in my own life. My daughter, you know, is typically very happy go lucky child and about in lots of activities, loves to go to clubs and activities.00;06;28;23 - 00;06;39;16
Unknown
And she couldn't do that for a whole year and a half, so we had to almost artificially create social environments for her. Luckily, I had a couple other families that were sort of in the same boat I was.00;06;40;08 - 00;06;50;27
Unknown
There was so much hybrid going on and kids getting pulled out and pushed in. We just decided to keep our kids home. We didn't want the in masks for the entire time. I heard they were acting like robots in school, basically.00;06;51;02 - 00;07;02;07
Unknown
They weren't even allowed to sit with their friends. They weren't a lot of high five each other in the hallway. I mean, these are the reasons we go to school. So, you know, we started to see, you know, even in my own family, we start to see what was going on.00;07;02;07 - 00;07;15;17
Unknown
And then I started getting more and more children, adolescents and younger kids coming into my practice for the same reasons because even if they were going to school, it was more like jail than it was school for a good year and a half.00;07;15;17 - 00;07;29;01
Unknown
I mean, it's a little better now, but even outdoor sports with masks on in some states, I mean, my state's, you know, completely all about the masks, but yet we can go to a restaurant, we can sit down and with 100 people in the restaurant, that's OK.00;07;29;15 - 00;07;41;19
Unknown
So apparently as soon as we sit down in a restaurant, I think it's the height, right? It's the height. And that's it. You know, you're right. I was not the best student, but I still looked forward to going to school when I was a kid.00;07;41;19 - 00;07;56;11
Unknown
And, you know, after summer vacation or spring break? Well, maybe not so much spring break with summer vacation, I was ready to go back to school when it started back up. There's such a big social aspect of it, and I know a lot of these traditions are American traditions.00;07;56;11 - 00;08;13;02
Unknown
But you know, these kids have grown up looking forward to prom and all all these different things. And I can just imagine the poor seniors that worked for all that time and then weren't able to walk. You know, we did some things here in our community locally.00;08;13;11 - 00;08;30;02
Unknown
We drove around, families with kids that were graduating put out signs and we drove around, honked and waved and all that. But that's hardly the same. How has it, as far as your practice goes, affected kids? I know you can't divulge any any, you know, confidential information or anything like that.00;08;30;02 - 00;08;45;14
Unknown
But what kind of things are you hearing from kids that maybe you, you notice is more prevalent or different than things that you heard prior to COVID, or maybe even in the beginning of COVID before the lockdowns kind of took their toll?00;08;46;12 - 00;09;03;00
Unknown
Well, you know, I know a lot before COVID, you know, a lot of kids were very addicted to video games and their online gaming and everything like that, but that just exploded over COVID. I mean, it really was their only social outlet, and it really created a bunch of, you know, basically addicts when it comes to video00;09;03;00 - 00;09;18;05
Unknown
games and all of these things. And even though we've seen it seems like our kids are connecting with other kids, it's clearly not the same. They're also joining chat rooms, which are very disturbing because some of them, it's almost like wet noodles trying to hold each other up.00;09;18;18 - 00;09;35;22
Unknown
There are a lot of them that are depressed. They're finding other depressed teens, and they're talking about their depression, but in an unsupervised and unproductive way. So they're kind of it's almost like being in a support group, even in a hospital setting where, you know, kids that weren't otherwise getting any type of ideas as far as cutting00;09;35;22 - 00;09;48;18
Unknown
themselves or committing suicide. I mean, some kids are actually talking about how to do it, like how is the best way to kill yourself? I mean, this is what we're dealing with. So, you know, kids are spending way too much time online.00;09;49;00 - 00;10;03;18
Unknown
So that, I think, is a huge, huge, huge, huge uptake. They're also being pulled a lot of like even my daughter, she was dancing for ten years and when COVID happened, she did not. I want to dance with a mask on, and so she quit something that she loved for ten years.00;10;04;07 - 00;10;18;21
Unknown
Luckily for her, she's very well resourced, so she was able to find other things to keep her occupied and other things like playing the piano. She started an Etsy business online. She started taking some courses online. But not all kids are that resourceful, nor are all kids that personality.00;10;19;17 - 00;10;32;08
Unknown
So, you know, we're getting a lot of kids that are just isolating themselves in their bedrooms. You know, as far as like looking for signs of depression and anxiety, you know, just dropping out, you know, dropping out of life, basically.00;10;32;14 - 00;10;47;09
Unknown
And it was almost like an invitation to drop out a life like in the beginning. I think we all welcomed it because part of the problem with the anxieties that were overscheduled right for the first month and a half, it was actually very, very relaxing when they said, you have to go home and you can't go to00;10;47;09 - 00;11;03;03
Unknown
school, and we all stayed home and cook together. And but that got very old, very quick, very fast, right? And then these kids don't want to go back because now they're out of condition. You know, I have some kids that were athletes that were looking, you know, colleges were looking going to be looking at them and now00;11;03;03 - 00;11;21;01
Unknown
they can't even play. Oh, then what happens to those kids that we're supposed to get scholarships? Right? And now they're whole, and now they're not conditioned. And if the parents don't have money to pay for coaches, which luckily a couple of my clients parents did, but most parents can't afford that or people were too scared to do00;11;21;01 - 00;11;37;20
Unknown
coaching with children because of the whole thing. Those kids were not staying conditioned, so they basically were dropping out of sports that they were looking actually at colleges. So this is like totally devastating to a child that's worked their whole entire life, you know, playing basketball or playing some other sport.00;11;38;18 - 00;11;52;23
Unknown
And all of a sudden now they're not doing it. So now they're also not getting the physical exercise and they're dropping out of sporting events and things like that. So that's a huge problem. Kids just don't even know where they belong, the segregation and the discrimination.00;11;52;23 - 00;12;09;18
Unknown
Now that's going on between who's vaccinated, who's not vaccinated, who likes masks, who doesn't like them as well. If you like masks then you must have voted for Biden. Right? Unbelievable. And as adults, we're feeling that and the kids are just they're like little mini adults.00;12;09;18 - 00;12;25;07
Unknown
So they're picking up on whatever the families are doing is basically what they're coming to school with. So that's a problem because kids that we're playing with other kids, all of a sudden their parents are telling them, not that they can't hang out with this kid or that kid because they're this kid's not vaccinated or this kid00;12;25;07 - 00;12;38;26
Unknown
doesn't wear a mask or vice versa. It goes both ways. It's not just one side or the other one. They tell them they're dangerous to each other. So now the people that were their friends are dangerous. They don't care about you is what they're being told.00;12;39;08 - 00;12;57;06
Unknown
Right? I can't see. You can't see a smile. You can't see if someone's looking at, you know, there's no the the developmental disabilities that we're creating and our children, especially the young ones that don't know any better. I mean, the older kids, at least, you know what I find, too at the high school level that you know00;12;57;06 - 00;13;05;08
Unknown
, a lot of it depends on the teacher, but like some of them, like, we'll give them more mask breaks or like, let them take it down if they're, you know, far enough from the kids, if they don't have symptoms.00;13;06;10 - 00;13;20;27
Unknown
So the younger kids, though, are so compliant and they want to listen to the teacher and they want to pay attention to listen to the rules so they keep it on their face. And there is absolutely no socialization, no picking up on social cues.00;13;20;27 - 00;13;35;18
Unknown
I mean, here we have a generation of children... we already had a generation of children that didn't know how to socialize. And now what are we doing? Yeah. The disconnect is even greater. And you mentioned, you know, the kids online interacting with each other.00;13;35;19 - 00;13;53;00
Unknown
So on the one hand, you think, well, at least they have access to one another through video chat and stuff like that. But. I mean, you mentioned the dangers of the weirdos that they could be interacting with, that's one thing, but even interacting with their friends.00;13;53;08 - 00;14;12;27
Unknown
Now they've gone from sometimes being physically present to, you know, almost always doing it via computer video, that type of thing. And a lot is still lost. You walk into their, you know, the average teenager's bedroom now, and it's dark and gloomy in there, and they're huddled over their computer or their phone they have their sweatshirt00;14;12;27 - 00;14;30;05
Unknown
over their heads. Yeah. And it's it's it's they're still isolated and you go, Hey, you know, what are you doing? Oh, I'm talking with my friend. But there's still such a limit to that type of relationship. You're not getting your body needs the presence of another human being.00;14;30;05 - 00;14;45;28
Unknown
It needs some touch. It needs a lot. I mean, we're built as I always joke with my wife. She's a pack animal and I'm a lone Hunter. But I have to admit that even this lone hunter likes to be in the company of the pack more often than not.00;14;45;28 - 00;15;04;00
Unknown
So we're built for that. We're built for community and relationships, and it's the virtual thing is just not doing it. You mentioned when you talked about the chat rooms before you mentioned something that I've really been thinking about too, is the people they run into in chat rooms and videos.00;15;04;19 - 00;15;32;17
Unknown
And I'm wondering, in addition to COVID and all of that the last couple of years, it seems there's been just an explosion of these like pseudoscience and kids and young adults who think that they are psychologists. They give this advice because they personally have anxiety or they have struggles or whatever, and they're gathering little tidbits of truth00;15;32;17 - 00;15;52;11
Unknown
and little tidbits of fiction from all over the internet. They're putting them together. They're making very convincing videos and what's happening is amateurs are almost giving advice like experts. And what are kids going to do? They're going to they're always going to listen other kids before they listen to us.00;15;52;14 - 00;16;08;13
Unknown
Right. So what do you think? How much do you think that pseudoscience and that it's almost like, you know, they always say a doctor, a doctor makes the worst patient or the doctor who treats himself as a fool and that type of thing.00;16;09;15 - 00;16;27;18
Unknown
You know, how much do you think this pseudoscience and this diagnosis of one another in peer to peer treatment? How how much do you think that is contributing to the increase in in like anxiety and depression? Well, I definitely think there's a lot of copycats.00;16;28;03 - 00;16;44;01
Unknown
I think also that people want to belong. They want to be a part of something. And so, you know, I have I have clients and I see all the time the teens that want to hold on to their diagnosis, whatever it is, because they feel like they're part of something, which is a very sad to me because00;16;44;06 - 00;16;55;03
Unknown
of that. Like you said, human nature, we want to belong. We want to believe that we belong to something. But I do think there's a danger in I mean, everyone that interacts with our child is potentially helping to raise them.00;16;55;17 - 00;17;10;08
Unknown
So we have to be very, very careful as far as what they're learning, how they're learning it, who they're learning it from, how qualified the person is. And you know, that's giving them this information. And, you know, I mean, listen, like we were, all kids all right.00;17;10;11 - 00;17;20;16
Unknown
We understand that, you know, we learn about sex for the first time and a lot of times it's with our friends and some of the information they give us is correct. And some of the information is completely incorrect.00;17;21;11 - 00;17;34;02
Unknown
But we so of course, there's always been that. But I think now the kids are seeking out this information and these people, I think there's like a dopamine thing that happens in people like they want to see how many likes they get and they want to see it.00;17;34;02 - 00;17;52;13
Unknown
You know, the social media thing has changed everything because, you know, people just put stuff out there just for effect, and it's not even necessarily the truth. So this is where the parent involvement is so, so important because, you know, we just assume when we send our kids to school that the teachers are doing, you know, their00;17;52;13 - 00;18;05;26
Unknown
best job to keep them safe and tell it, teach them all the right things. And you know, now we're starting to recognize, well know, you know, could there be things that our kids are learning at school that might not be completely true or maybe just very one sided?00;18;06;07 - 00;18;23;24
Unknown
We can just say that right now, well, what? Kids can be online and be learning something from a YouTuber, and maybe some of the information is correct and some of the information is not correct. So we really should be paying closer attention to who our kids are interacting with, even when it's on the, you know, the internet00;18;24;03 - 00;18;39;26
Unknown
And everything's on the internet now and now since school started on the internet because of COVID. The other problem is a lot of these teachers are now teaching remote like basically teaching to a computer. So if a kid has a book that they're reading in class, it used to be that the teacher would send a book00;18;39;26 - 00;18;53;01
Unknown
home and the parents would clean up their backpack with them. Oh, what are you reading? And now parents are very unaware of some of the things that they're learning in school, from their peers, from their teachers. Because everything's now online.00;18;53;01 - 00;19;09;13
Unknown
Everything's a video that they're watching. Everything is a book that's literally virtual and in their Google classroom or whatever we're doing or we're in their chat rooms, we don't know what they're doing or what they're learning, what they're absorbing.00;19;09;28 - 00;19;26;12
Unknown
And they're like tiny sponges. They're going to pick up everything they, you know, they hear everything they learn and they're going to ingest it. So we better be prepared as parents to understand, to sort of un teach in some cases, everything down to a value system.00;19;26;23 - 00;19;41;26
Unknown
I mean, are there, they're learning a value system out there, and some of it might be wonderful, and some of it might not be wonderful. Right? If we want it to be consistent with our values, right? And we need to be aware and we need to be involved for sure, right?00;19;42;16 - 00;20;01;13
Unknown
So what are what are some of the things that a parent? I mean, you know, unfortunately, I think a lot of times depression is mistaken. Our anger or yeah, depression is mistaken for anger. Kids are just angry. And we, you know, it's always kind of a joke.00;20;01;14 - 00;20;13;12
Unknown
Your kid comes home, they're sullen. They're slamming the door. They're pretty. They don't want to talk to you. And somebody'll just dismiss it like, oh, teenagers, right? And there is some truth to that. There's hormones or figuring out who they are.00;20;13;21 - 00;20;30;19
Unknown
They're listening to us, argue about all kinds of stuff. I can just imagine the toll it's taking on them because here we're telling them as they're being raised up and going through school. Think of your future, this is for your future, do this for your future, and now they hear on the news that because of the climate00;20;30;19 - 00;20;41;19
Unknown
change, there's no future and COVID is going to kill us all. And this politician or that politician is going to cause the demise of the country, the world. So kids are starting to think, What are we doing this for?00;20;41;19 - 00;21;03;08
Unknown
There isn't a future, and I can see where that would definitely lead into that hopelessness that would become depression and all of that. So as our kids are going through that, what are some of the things that we should look for that maybe we would say, Hey, that's not just normal, you know, teenage angst or so00;21;03;08 - 00;21;19;02
Unknown
what are some of the ways that we can identify that they might be struggling with anxiety or depression if they're just not willing to talk with us about it right away? I mean, you bring up a good point as far as fear, because I think fear is the driver of hate.00;21;19;09 - 00;21;37;23
Unknown
It's the driver of anxiety. It's the driver of depression. So they're living in it's a PTSD world right now. Everything that we're learning about, everything that we're hearing about is doom and gloom. And so again, talking with our teenagers, and if they don't want to talk to us, you know, to set rules around that like, you can't00;21;37;23 - 00;21;48;15
Unknown
just go to your room and watch TV, like, you know, I always recommend that, you know, TV gets turned off at a certain time. TV is not somebody's room. Computers, you know, are in the main part of the house only.00;21;48;15 - 00;22;00;29
Unknown
So there are things that we really need to do as parents, we really need to set boundaries. But important, though, I mean, so some things to really look out for, obviously, is the amount of time they're spending on social media and or devices, first of all.00;22;01;28 - 00;22;12;29
Unknown
Another thing to really look out for is, you know, are they just not wanting to be a part of family activities anymore? That's a big one. I mean, a lot of kids will say, Well, that's normal teenage stuff like who wants to hang out with the parents?00;22;12;29 - 00;22;26;19
Unknown
But again, and at that point in their parenting as parents, we go, you know, it's probably better if you know, we kind of leave them alone and give them some privacy. And I've seen pretty horrible things happen because parents give the kids privacy, you know?00;22;26;20 - 00;22;37;22
Unknown
Little did they know that the kids are setting up their suicide plan and the parents don't realize it until after the child has passed away. So, I mean, that happens. So we really, really want to be paying attention.00;22;39;20 - 00;22;58;13
Unknown
But, you know, a change in diet, weight gain or weight loss. You know, we want. I mean, again, give them privacy. But you know, if we're suspicious that they're cutting themselves or hurting themselves or burning themselves, I mean, these are things that sometimes parents aren't even noticing or paying attention to.00;22;58;14 - 00;23;13;11
Unknown
So, you know, very, very important that they have activities that they enjoy going to. It's OK if they change activities because kids change their mind. We all do. You know, we've been doing this for these many years, but now we want to try this sport or that club.00;23;13;24 - 00;23;33;14
Unknown
But if kids are just not engaging and I would definitely encourage physical contact with other people, and that's why I think being on a sports team or being in a club after school, because you do need that. I mean, even the little nuances like just telling a joke to each other, right?00;23;33;20 - 00;23;43;19
Unknown
My daughter said the most interesting thing is last year she was in, you know, a virtual for school and now she's in school. So what's the biggest difference? She says, You know, I missed so much when I was virtual.00;23;44;07 - 00;23;56;09
Unknown
I miss the smile. I miss the the joke. I couldn't hear what the person was saying. So you sort of miss half the conversation and that's what makes going to school fun, right? So I kind of need all of it.00;23;57;05 - 00;24;15;28
Unknown
And so definitely to get the kids involved and, you know, don't let them stay in their room, you know, with paper on their windows preventing light from coming in. I mean, they do they or they, you know, kids always have to have the blinds closed, and a lot of kids will say, Well, I have sensory issues, especially00;24;15;28 - 00;24;32;00
Unknown
kids on the spectrum. Like, That's huge, right? Oh, well, they don't like noise, so they have no noise canceling earphones and then they don't like light, so they have the shades pulled. So that's a warning sign that we need to do something even biometrically, you know?00;24;32;00 - 00;24;47;05
Unknown
So I've learned a lot through my journey as far as what sensory processing disorder is, even which is usually mineral deficiency and Lyme disease and other co-infections and things. So don't just chalk it up to genetics, don't just chalk it up to other just teenagers.00;24;48;27 - 00;25;08;06
Unknown
This is the time to really, really be paying attention because kids are under a lot of pressure right now. Right? And you mentioned like touch, right? That's sports in a club. And, you know, I guess I never even really thought about that what you know, you think about in a normal day before COVID.00;25;08;07 - 00;25;22;16
Unknown
Think about how many times you touch or you're touched in a very nonchalant way. It might be a pat on the shoulder, a handshake, a high five boys, you know, teasing each other a little push here. Bump each other.00;25;22;16 - 00;25;37;12
Unknown
Yeah, right. And. And that's, you know, I bet if you counted, I think we'd probably be surprised. Before, you know, pre-COVID, how many times a day you touch other people if you counted it. I bet you would be surprised.00;25;37;19 - 00;25;49;28
Unknown
But we do it. It's part of that pack animal thing. It's part of that camaraderie. And when you miss out on that, it's definitely, definitely a bad thing. So that's something I guess as parents that we can consider, too. Give them hugs.00;25;50;10 - 00;26;08;01
Unknown
If they'll allow it, make them do it. No keys to the car until I get a hug, goodbye or whatever. And you know, a couple of the things that we do as a family is. Whenever possible, which is most days, if you work at it, we eat dinner together at the table.00;26;08;16 - 00;26;23;22
Unknown
There's some days. He, you know, he works, he goes to school, he works. I come home, he's already come home from school and went to work when he gets in. He's eating some leftovers. We go sit with him when he's my youngest still at home.00;26;24;21 - 00;26;37;07
Unknown
And when he's not working, we we eat together and he hates it sometimes, and he'll come with his phone. He's watching an episode of something and we're like, No, that's not. Take the earbuds out. We're turning everything off.00;26;37;07 - 00;26;50;11
Unknown
We don't eat with the TV on. And I'm certainly not being like, I'm better than everybody. But it's one of the ways that I have to carve out that time with him is to eat dinner together, and it's something that he really can't deny.00;26;50;12 - 00;27;01;25
Unknown
You got to eat. So you got here. So. So that is important. I think you make a good point because it's chicken, so some people really do that. What's the best thing to happen in your day? What's the worst thing that happened today?00;27;02;07 - 00;27;15;28
Unknown
Just ask very pointed questions. And mealtime is definitely one of those times to get that done. Another, you know, or right before bed to right, you know, lay on their bed with them. Write about something silly. Ask them about something that you knew.00;27;15;28 - 00;27;28;03
Unknown
You know, they took a test. Like, how was the test? You know, so. And kids will never talk to parents about things that are important unless they can talk to parents about things that aren't important. Hmm. So I like that.00;27;28;04 - 00;27;44;21
Unknown
So listen to remember you don't care about Minecraft, but listen. But listen. Right? Yes, that's that's a real important key that to get to connect with your children because. There they are talking to us, we just don't want to hear.00;27;46;25 - 00;28;00;13
Unknown
You know, I have to admit I've heard more about Kurt Cobain in the last few months than I care to. I like him good music, but I know more than I needed to know. But but my son's integrity is learning to play guitar, so I listen.00;28;01;11 - 00;28;19;10
Unknown
And I I'm thankful that he wants to talk to me. So we want to watch for changes in their habits. We want to watch if they're withdrawing from things. And you mentioned to which I like, don't get too excited if they change activities, if they say, Well, I don't like to dance anymore and maybe I want to00;28;19;10 - 00;28;30;10
Unknown
take martial arts, that's one thing. But if your kid's been dancing for years and they loved it and now they don't want to do it, they're just huddling in their room, then that is a sign that there's something going on.00;28;30;10 - 00;28;44;20
Unknown
So if they're stopping activities, if their diet changes that sudden weight loss or gain and they're just trying to withdrawal from people in general, those are all things that we want to kind of be aware of and start talking to them.00;28;44;20 - 00;28;55;07
Unknown
And then, you know, we've they're very reactive to, you know, there's one thing to be angry and having, you know, sometimes like, Oh, you know, why you know, yelling at, you know, because you ask them to fold their clothes.00;28;55;27 - 00;29;06;23
Unknown
And it's another thing to just be overreacting for every little thing. And that's when we know the kids are really sad, deep down, or they're really angry at itself. So a lot of parents don't pick up on that cue.00;29;06;24 - 00;29;20;24
Unknown
But when kids are angry, 99% of the time, they're angry at themselves. If they get mad at their sister because, you know, because the sister's doing something, it's probably because maybe they don't feel like they can. So that's why they're reacting.00;29;21;01 - 00;29;33;14
Unknown
So we always want to figure out what the triggers are right and understand what the real feeling is. And that's another thing is that we don't really talk to kids about their feelings. We just talk about them what they're thinking about, which is helpful.00;29;34;03 - 00;29;45;13
Unknown
But unless we can really get them to identify feelings, it's a skill they'll have for the rest of their lives and very worthwhile investment as far as trying to, you know, even if you have to all start with the chart, right?00;29;45;14 - 00;30;02;25
Unknown
Anger is only a reaction to a feeling, and so is anxiety. They're not really feeling there are physical body reactions to something that's going on. And and it's important that we have those feelings because all those sensations, because it alerts us that something's going on right?00;30;03;08 - 00;30;22;04
Unknown
So emotional for anxious. Yeah, or very emotional intelligence. Is that is that basically, yeah. Like, why am I feeling this way else? Deeper going on with them? And, you know, usually if you try to approach them at that moment, it's a lost cause, you know, and that's the thing, too.00;30;22;04 - 00;30;35;22
Unknown
We never come back to them. We forget. We get busy instead of saying, Hey, you know, when you know when you couldn't find your shoes this morning, you seem to be really angry. Like, that doesn't really seem to fit, you know?00;30;36;06 - 00;30;47;04
Unknown
And then usually it's like, Oh, we'll have this really bad, you know, this math test? Or I couldn't find my shoes because I can't ever find anything. I'm always losing everything. You know, because again, it's usually about self, right?00;30;47;17 - 00;31;06;20
Unknown
And you know, there's this I was a youth pastor from years ago that I saw him, he mentioned, and I'm sure you've heard this or an equivalent, and he's not the first person to say it. But for every one opportunity, you have to say something negative to somebody, specifically your kids.00;31;07;04 - 00;31;25;02
Unknown
You have about 20 opportunities to say something positive. And we also forget that when they're sullen and they're, you know, in their room and they're crabby with us, it's hard for us to remember to go, Hey, you know, I love you and I really like how you were sensitive to our neighbor or you help the lady across00;31;25;02 - 00;31;40;09
Unknown
us. That was really cool, you know? So that's something I think we have to be more intentional to lift them up, to encourage them, let them know that you see the good and not just the bad light. And then something I kind of thought of.00;31;40;10 - 00;31;57;06
Unknown
I have two boys and two girls, oldest and youngest are boys, and the two in the middle are girls. And I realized I wish I would realized this maybe 25 years ago. But I realized just a couple of years ago that men tend to treat our boys like men before they're men.00;31;57;06 - 00;32;15;25
Unknown
And what I mean by that is, you know, men, we rag on each other a lot. We'll say little things like, Oh, look, I did it. Really? Why didn't you do two or whatever? And for us, it's playful, but until you're sure of who you are and you have a place of trust and you know that this00;32;15;25 - 00;32;30;25
Unknown
person cares about you, it's hard to take that stuff in stride. So I think it's important, too, that we do remember that we want to encourage and lift them up and give them the good news much more often than we give them any, any bad news.00;32;31;07 - 00;32;44;12
Unknown
So, you know, and they affects kids developmentally, they don't get the kidding, the sarcasm in the very literal right. So if you say, hey, you know, you're joking, you know, it's a joke like, hey, you know, you have two left feet, you know, blah blah blah.00;32;44;23 - 00;33;04;03
Unknown
We think it's funny. Yes, we're making a joke about their clumsiness, for example. But for them, they're they're hearing that is a piece of shit, right? Good enough. I'm, you know, I'm stupid. You know, I'm clumsy. You know, that's how they are hearing it because they're well, you know, here's a real world example of this.00;33;04;03 - 00;33;18;10
Unknown
She's going to kill me if she sees as a friend of mine when her when she was like three. She heard her dad say. Pretty girls, he probably said this to his wife as a joke. Pretty girls, don't pee or poop.00;33;19;08 - 00;33;43;26
Unknown
Oh no. So her deduction at three years old was, I pee and poop. So I'm not pretty. And she is, but for a very long time, and I would imagine she still struggles with that. That because that's three is an impressionable time for the male who you love the most and loves you the most, says something like that00;33;45;00 - 00;33;58;10
Unknown
. So I think it's it's important that we always remember that they can hear little ears here. We think they don't. But my my adult children now tell me, yes, we heard all of it. So. So we have to remember.00;33;59;01 - 00;34;20;08
Unknown
But now, on the other hand of that, this is something I wanted to ask you about, too, the victim mentality that we're seeing these days. You mentioned it's a virtue. Right. So having something wrong or something you're struggling with or something like that, they they a lot of times see it as a virtue or an identity.00;34;20;08 - 00;34;33;09
Unknown
Now I'm part of an accepted group and that type of thing. And while we do want to be sensitive to our kids, we want to lift them up and we want to deal with their issues, whether they're small or great.00;34;33;25 - 00;34;51;00
Unknown
We also want to help them become resilient. That's what we're here for. We're here to teach them. But you're going to bump your knee and it's going to bleed and but you can clean it up and it'll scab over and you should not stop skateboarding because you bumped your knee, right where this day and age, it just00;34;51;00 - 00;35;08;06
Unknown
seems like the first time a kid bumps his knee. They wrap them and plastic wrap. Throw everything away, and that's the end of it. This is never going to happen again. We're so afraid they're going to be hurt or experienced disappointment that we weaken them instead of help them become more resilient.00;35;08;06 - 00;35;30;15
Unknown
So how does a parent navigate that? You know, that fine line between supporting them, loving them and nurturing them right versus turning them into, you know, victims and weak weaklings? How do we do that? Well, it's a good point, because resiliency is the number one thing for health, for all, you know, mental health and physical health.00;35;30;15 - 00;35;43;08
Unknown
You know, we're all going to get sick. But what is our immune system doing is are we able to fight it? So it's the same so emotionally to raise, you know, emotionally resilient kids. first of all, they need to see that we're emotionally resilient.00;35;43;23 - 00;36;05;29
Unknown
So, you know, if we're drinking every day. And that's what they're seeing as a coping skill. Unfortunately, you know, addiction becomes possibly in their wheelhouse and part of what they're doing. And those with addictions tend to be a little bit more blamey, I would say, of other people, you know, this person is making me feel this way00;36;05;29 - 00;36;19;14
Unknown
, blah blah blah. And not always, but it's just maladaptive coping skills. It's never anything negative. It's just if we're doing this, we want to find healthier ways of coping ourselves. So first of all, comes from, you know, what's the family system like?00;36;19;14 - 00;36;34;20
Unknown
What are we doing? Are we showing resiliency? Are we labeling ourselves? So I always will crack people like instead of saying, you know, if someone says, Well, you're a liar, I said, No, no, you had lied. Right? Completely.00;36;34;28 - 00;36;56;00
Unknown
It changes the entire thing. And we're not constantly putting ourselves down constantly and then becoming like the victim of circumstances. So part of the resiliency to when you want to build resilient kids is letting them fail. I mean, when we were when they were learning how to walk, we didn't stand holding their hand.00;36;56;00 - 00;37;15;12
Unknown
They would never have learned how we let go. We let them take a couple of steps and fall. And then after that, we forgot. Right? That, you know. And then, you know, I think, you know, I make jokes all the time about myself because it is more difficult because we are talking about spectrum, right?00;37;15;14 - 00;37;36;18
Unknown
It is much more difficult to allow a child on the spectrum because you don't know what's learned dependency and what's really, they can't do it right. So even as a therapist with all my knowledge and all my knowingness, I tend to, you know, depending on the nurture versus nature again, depending on the nature of the child, I00;37;36;18 - 00;37;53;10
Unknown
have to. And both of them have the opposite. Elena took the spoon out of my hand when she was six months old and said, I'll do it myself. And, you know, in her little language, and I understood what she was saying because she had corrugated syllables, unlike my son who just said da da da.00;37;53;11 - 00;38;03;04
Unknown
And I thought that that was language, and it wasn't until realizing what language was. But she would pull it out of my hand. There are a lot of nonverbal cues on that. My son literally would have his mouth open.00;38;03;04 - 00;38;22;15
Unknown
Still, if I want, if I wanted to feed him, he'd probably love it. So part of it is like nature. So it's a very hard. To fight that, I mean, but we have to. So sometimes these kids, just naturally from the time they're very, very young, they just have more of a dependency personality.00;38;22;15 - 00;38;40;14
Unknown
They want someone else to feed them. They want somebody else to help them will. And sometimes we're so rushed that it's just seems easier, yes, to just tie their shoe, then the struggle because, you know, especially even with all of his motor problems like to watch him was like, so painful.00;38;40;25 - 00;38;53;20
Unknown
So it's just easier to do it. So part of it is on speed. And then part of it is just because we can't handle our own pain, right? And handle watching our kids suffer this way or suffer. That's the word we use.00;38;53;20 - 00;39;07;01
Unknown
That's the word we attached. But maybe at their own pace, maybe they're learning the way they have to learn. Maybe they have to get frustrated in order to say, You know what, I'm going to do it a different way because our kids today don't know how to problem solve.00;39;07;25 - 00;39;27;02
Unknown
Well, and that's where they use the word suffer. Not all our kids, but well, yeah, yeah. But but it is a bigger problem. Yeah, and that's why and I say this. The problem is we not only do we not want, I mean, nobody wants their kids to suffer or experience disappointment, but it's part of life.00;39;27;03 - 00;39;44;22
Unknown
Life is tough. It's not fair. You have to work no matter who you are or where it's still is tough. Everybody has problems. They're just different. We don't want to want our kids to suffer or feel disappointed. But which is, I can understand that, but we don't.00;39;44;22 - 00;40;02;12
Unknown
We never allow them to suffer or be disappointed. And you know, I always tell when I talk about fairness, right? We have a warped sense of the word fair. OK. Oh yeah. If you and I go hiking and I bring lunch and you don't bring lunch, what's fair as I eat lunch and you don't?00;40;02;12 - 00;40;20;12
Unknown
That's what's fair. Right now, what's merciful is I would give you half of my lunch because obviously you need it more than I do. So I would give it right. But. The suffering, though, that we would both experience if we both forgot her lunch and I couldn't bail you out or you couldn't bail me out was the00;40;20;12 - 00;40;34;11
Unknown
next time we go hiking. We would remember to bring our lunch. And that's an important, you know, so a little bit of suffering, right? If if you're not going to die, it's not going to cause permanent damage, a little bit of suffering is a good thing if you learn from it.00;40;34;22 - 00;40;54;03
Unknown
And I think it's more important that we talk about the suffering and how to avoid it in the future, rather than just completely removing it from their lives unless we want them living with us forever, right? And the same sometimes goes for anxiety or even a little bit of sadness, and I don't by any means mean to00;40;54;03 - 00;41;15;18
Unknown
diminish anxiety or panic. But if you're walking into a room full of people you don't know, you should feel anxious a little bit. That's what keeps you from walking in and acting a fool. Right, right. So there is a certain mechanism that's part of our creative being that prevents us from acting foolish and anxiety.00;41;16;01 - 00;41;33;05
Unknown
Being uncomfortable or nervous in a different situation helps us to recognize danger signals and avoid it. And if we're always removing that, and that's one thing, you know? We I see parents do things for kids all the time, talk to the cashier or to their food.00;41;33;14 - 00;41;46;27
Unknown
Why is that? Well, he's anxious. He doesn't like to talk. No, no, no, no, no honey. What? What are you going to do? He'll be living in his home with a hoodie on ordering everything on an app. And that's no, no good.00;41;46;27 - 00;41;59;26
Unknown
So how do we navigate that where we just make them do this stuff? Sometimes that like I'm sure you find, even in your practice, sometimes that that might be part of the problem while you're having to talk to this person.00;42;00;07 - 00;42;12;27
Unknown
Yeah, well, definitely. I mean, my dad always said, life is fair, and then you die. Life's not fair. And then you die. Yeah. He would just always throw all that stuff. And, you know, if I say it's not fair, you know, if I say I was bored, he'd say, No, no, you're just boring.00;42;13;14 - 00;42;28;22
Unknown
Yeah, right, right. You would never let us get away with that kind of talk. So again, I think it's like. But it's like it became rote, right? I mean, every time, like if I was like, I can't do something, he's like, Oh yes, you can like, right?00;42;29;01 - 00;42;40;25
Unknown
And he'd walk away. And then maybe in like a half an hour if we really were struggling, he would, you know, but then he would say, Well, what? What do you do next? So help you God do it for you, not do it.00;42;40;25 - 00;42;56;04
Unknown
He would never do it to the point where, you know, I went to college and I'm by myself, you know, like, so this is where I'm like, I remember like filling out applications all by myself, and I remember thinking, like everyone else is, my parents are filling out their college applications that my dad, right, want to go00;42;56;04 - 00;43;11;01
Unknown
to college. I guess you have to fill out your application like so I mean, obviously, I can go too far sometimes. But I think in some ways, like I am totally resilient. I know how to fill in an application, know how to change a tire on my car, like these are life skills.00;43;11;01 - 00;43;28;18
Unknown
So I think you're absolutely correct. We're taking the opportunity a way for them to learn life skills, to problem solve, to figure themselves out. And it's a it's a cultural problem in the world right now, and I don't know if it's because we overcompensated because our parents before, you know, in my young life, I don't think I00;43;28;18 - 00;43;44;23
Unknown
think there was less involvement. And I think overall there was a less anxiety. And I think it's being it's the heightened anxiety in everyone that's just we're on this hamster wheel. And I think that that's probably part of why we're just jumping in to fix it.00;43;44;23 - 00;43;59;03
Unknown
But we're, you know, there was an article written about 15 years ago that is called Are we raising a nation of WIMPs? Great article, I think it was like Psychology Today, and it talked about like kids that were cutting and doing all these self-harming things or.00;43;59;23 - 00;44;15;23
Unknown
And they it was all because we were over doing it for them emotionally and physically that we were creating a society of kids that couldn't, couldn't do things themselves. So yes, I see that. And then how that manifests.00;44;15;23 - 00;44;32;25
Unknown
Is there 25 years old or older? They're literally in their parents basement. They're on video games all day. They have no interest in getting a job. They also have these inflated egos of like, Well, if I can't make $100,000 a year, then I'm not working.00;44;33;12 - 00;44;45;20
Unknown
Oh, they have no idea that like, you have to get the $15 an hour first right at your boss has to like you and promote you. And that's how life works, even if you graduate from college, you know.00;44;45;20 - 00;45;00;04
Unknown
So I have these college graduates, do they're sitting on their there because everything came too easy for them? And you know, I look at my two kids and my son struggles the hardest with with academics, much harder than my daughter.00;45;00;04 - 00;45;11;14
Unknown
But I have to say his work ethic when it comes to school and his work ethic when it comes is better than hers because he's had to work so hard, he knows what it means to have to study.00;45;11;21 - 00;45;24;10
Unknown
He knows what it means to have to like, sit down and do the work where she she can get away without even trying which. So it's like it's almost like the same thing. If you're sitting in the living room without even trying, your mother's always just folding your clothes for you.00;45;24;20 - 00;45;43;14
Unknown
You'll never learn how to fold the clothes, right? This is the clip I'm going to show my 16 year old right now. Folderol clothes, right? So, yeah, so there is. And again, I think both of us would. You especially would acknowledge that anxiety is real.00;45;43;15 - 00;46;10;24
Unknown
Depression is real or definitely not diminishing any mental health issue. But every bit of anxiety is not a mental health issue. Every sadness you experience or disappointment is not depression. And at some point, even if it's real anxiety, real depression, you want to treat it, deal with it, work through it so that you are more resilient and00;46;10;24 - 00;46;25;07
Unknown
then you can deal with some of these other problems. I think the act of accomplishing something and working through something ultimately will will help you in the future as well. So you want to get to the root of it, right?00;46;25;12 - 00;46;37;17
Unknown
If a person has anxiety or depression, you want to get to the root of why. You know, if it's a trauma related situation, you want to get them the help, you know? You know, I do EMDR for trauma and my therapy practice psychotherapist.00;46;38;10 - 00;46;57;03
Unknown
You know, we're here. We're here to do to help kids learn coping skills, to help kids work through feelings. I mean, so that's why we do what we do. And then on the other time, you know, I'm learning more and more about biomedicine and how our our biology and how if we're deficient in certain nutrients, how that00;46;57;03 - 00;47;13;22
Unknown
affects our mood and our in our body, how we're functioning, our muscle function, everything. And so we don't do enough in the society to look for underlying causes. Kids just don't wake up anxious. one day something has had to happen either bio medically or emotionally.00;47;13;22 - 00;47;31;15
Unknown
You know, trauma something. Something happened, and we're just so quick to just give a kid a medication ADHD medication if they're not paying attention. Anxiety medication. If they feel even the slightest bit anxious and there's no investigation, we call off the search for any understanding of why these kids are this way in the first place.00;47;31;24 - 00;47;52;12
Unknown
Right? And that's why I had to write my book Healing Without Hurting, because there's 101 things we could be doing for our children that we're not doing, whether it be therapy related because I list all the therapy options Western Eastern, I name, you know, all the nutritional deficiencies, what causes those toxicity?00;47;52;12 - 00;48;09;12
Unknown
What causes that? And we really have to figure out why is it a child sleeping, you know, sleep? That's another one. Kids are anxious because they're not sleeping. Kids are anxious because they're not getting enough protein because they need protein to break down two amino acids to break down into neurotransmitters and to create air transmitters.00;48;09;18 - 00;48;27;20
Unknown
Right. So if you have no friends, you know, no dopamine, you're going to be pretty depressed. If you don't have vitamin D like vitamin D is the sunshine vitamin, you're going to be pretty depressed. You know, a lot of these kids to gaming sweatshirts over their head in the basement, their vitamin D level could be at like00;48;28;05 - 00;48;45;12
Unknown
zero. Right? That's not going to be good. So not only are they affecting themselves, emotionally giving themselves PTSD and all of that, but they're also depriving themselves of sunshine in nature and exercise and all the things that help to build those neurotransmitters in their bodies.00;48;45;14 - 00;49;03;26
Unknown
It's good for your immune system, it's good for your mental health, it's good for your physically, I mean, all all across the board and you know. There seems to be a couple different camps, so to speak when it comes, comes to things like therapy and in helping kids be resilient and things like that.00;49;05;10 - 00;49;20;16
Unknown
I don't think either of us are looking to change any his personality, right? If you're on the spectrum, there are unique gifts that come with that right. There are there are good things that come with ADHD or ADHD.00;49;20;25 - 00;49;41;03
Unknown
It's learning to channel it so that it can help the kid become a productive adult so that they can enjoy life. It's not about managing them or making them easier for the parents to deal with. It's about helping them be resilient and successful themselves so they can get as much enjoyment out of life as they can.00;49;41;24 - 00;50;03;14
Unknown
Sometimes that's very limited. Sometimes it can be a very high functioning situation. Sometimes it's a temporary situation if they're not on the spectrum and there are other things involved. So, you know, I've we've even got some blowback online from folks who are upset about our product Neural Balance because it helps to balance the endocannabinoid system.00;50;03;22 - 00;50;18;08
Unknown
So it helps to deal with some of that sensory overload, anxiety and things like that. But it doesn't make you drowsy or sleepy. We don't want to make a kid a zombie. We want to help them deal with some of the difficulties that come with having an out of balance endocannabinoid system.00;50;18;19 - 00;50;31;13
Unknown
So we don't want to change personality. We want to help them. And that's what you're looking to do, too. With the training and in the counseling and the tips that you share with parents, it's it's to support and care for.00;50;31;14 - 00;50;51;08
Unknown
You can't just ignore the difficulties that the kid is having and say, Well, that's who they are because of this or that, that's not really healthy for them, either. So it is important to find that happy medium. So we want to always support them with love, with some touch, with some good inner, you know, good nutrition, good00;50;51;08 - 00;51;05;24
Unknown
food and all of that great stuff and almost everything that we've talked about, if not all of it. And then much more is found in your book. So like I said, we'll link to your website so people can see where they can get that.00;51;05;24 - 00;51;20;24
Unknown
And look, we're just we're really just, you know, maximizing their potential. Right, right. And whatever that potential is, and for some kids, they lose diagnoses altogether. I mean, in my mind, diagnoses are made up by pharmaceutical companies anyway.00;51;21;04 - 00;51;33;09
Unknown
I mean, we could just we could almost take anybody and everyone will have everything on the spectrum. You know, like everyone in my mind, everyone's on the spectrum. Right? That's right. Everybody gets a little excited. Someone else has a little attention problems, blah blah blah.00;51;33;10 - 00;51;47;24
Unknown
And then of course, there are some kids that are much more severe, but at the same time, we're just maximizing their potential. We want them to be the best that they could be. And yes, it helps the whole family system too, because when everyone's calm, that helps us.00;51;47;25 - 00;52;04;00
Unknown
It's like everybody's a little happier everyone. Well, and you know, I'd say the biggest fear that I and I mean, I can talk to a kid, a parent with a kid who's three years old on the spectrum that parents biggest fear is usually my kids are going to outlive me.00;52;04;25 - 00;52;21;12
Unknown
And who's going to care for my kid? Nobody's going to love my kid and care for my kid. Be willing to put as much effort into my kid as I will. So it's important that you do as much as you can to help them be as resilient as possible for their own sake.00;52;23;01 - 00;52;42;21
Unknown
Because, you know, chances are you're they're going to outlive you. So you you do want them to be as happy and productive as possible so that they're not just stuck in a home or something, or God forbid, someone takes advantage of them because they're unable to care for themselves.00;52;42;21 - 00;53;00;08
Unknown
So that's a big concern. I think helping them be more resilient and get through this stuff is definitely a big part of that. So, all right. Well, I appreciate you talking with me about this stuff. I think it's it's good content and hopefully it will be valuable to to our viewers.00;53;01;04 - 00;53;25;00
Unknown
So now we're going to a new segment that hopefully we won't keep finding more things to make fun of. But the Fouty Follies, you mentioned a few things during the course of the talk and masks and mandates. I don't really want to discourage anybody from from doing what they think they need to do to keep themselves or00;53;25;00 - 00;53;39;27
Unknown
their family safe or anything like that. But I'm a big, data driven guy, and when I look at the all of the different data that's out there, I don't think that the masks and the mandates are playing out to be such a great idea.00;53;40;03 - 00;53;56;12
Unknown
But I'm not a professional either. But one thing that I do notice is daily almost. We receive conflicting information from the powers that be the CDC may. Put out two or three different statements that some don't make sense, then the W.H.O..00;53;57;07 - 00;54;20;27
Unknown
But who do you trust? You know you have a guy like Anthony Fauci, who all the way back to the HIV debacle during the Eighties and all that he was withholding information and doing things that were not at all helpful but very profitable for him and the people he was associated with, in some cases, very detrimental to00;54;20;27 - 00;54;37;03
Unknown
people that were suffering with HIV. And now here we fast forward. I don't know how he's flown under the radar all this time. But, you know, he sits in a in a congressional hearing and he lies through his teeth and people believe him because he is who he is.00;54;37;03 - 00;54;50;06
Unknown
But then we find out a couple of weeks later that it was it was true. What you know what Rand Paul was questioning him about was true, the gain of function experiments and all that. So we find out that that's true.00;54;50;06 - 00;55;09;04
Unknown
We find out that they've been been funding it, that he's kind of kept, you know, a lot of information from us. It's one thing after another with this guy. So I mean, what do you think about that? How do we actually since I talked to you just a week ago, what if what else have you learned about00;55;09;04 - 00;55;25;12
Unknown
him? No, there was one since we talked that, which I'm not. I mean, I don't mean to sound like jubilant about it because this is even more tragic. But here he's experimenting on foster kids orphans in New York.00;55;26;19 - 00;55;40;29
Unknown
So he's just he's he's not a good guy. And this is a guy who's making the policy. It seems for everybody, and we're supposed to trust that. So what do we even do? And what else have you learned that he's been up to that we can poke fun at him about? -
Fermented foods are one of the most important foods to consume in your daily life. They not only help you absorb Collagen, vitamins, and minerals 400 times more than someone who eats raw, vegan, or healthy foods alone, but they also keep harmful pathogens at bay in your body and on your skin. Join us LIVE as we learn from Brittny Schwartz, founder of This Chick Is Raw and a passionate believer in probiotic rich foods and beverages. To learn more about Brittny and her products, visit them here: https://thischickisraw.com/?ref=395
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"The Neural Hemp has helped âchillâ him out a bit. We have noticed a change with this. Itâs not as helpful as Neural Balance with attention and focus but the reduced hyperactivity and labile mood is a big help at least. Weâre big fans of you." ~ Noelle P.
Please join us to learn more about Neural Hemp, how to save on your order, answers to common questions, and we'll address the following points and more with our guest Adam Payne of UltraBotanica.
-Why not CBD (The Entourage Effect)
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Glyphosate, fragrances, air pollution, formaldehyde, and pesticides are just a few of the dangerous things the average person may be exposed to every day.
Watch this show and learn how to help support the body's ability to detox these toxins gently and effectively and support normal levels of inflammation. MTHFR? This is a must watch for you!
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*This broadcast is not intended to prevent, cure, or treat any disease.
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SPECIAL NEEDS PARENTS! Have you ever thought about preparing your child, home, or automobile in the event you are unable to communicate and your child comes in contact with an emergency responder?
What can you do to prepare ahead of time in the event you are incapacitated during a fire, auto accident, elopement, or a medical issue of your own?
Join us for this episode of The Spectrum Report with our special guest Sergeant Corey Mead.
He'll address these issues and, you can ask questions in the comment section.
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Join us for this episode of The Spectrum Report with our guest Jennifer Giustra-Kozek. Drawing on her own experience as a mother of a child with ADHD, Jennifer is a mother, author, speaker, blogger, and board certified psychotherapist.
Learn about the great resources she has to help parents of children with autism, adhd, add, and more and how she convinced her town to stop using the dangerous chemicals glyphosate and triclopyr in public places.
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www.momsacrossamerica.org
www.healingwithouthurting.com
Watch the documentary video HERE.
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Join us and our special guest, Betul Hatipoglu, MD, Staff Endocrinologist Cleveland Clinic, as we explore the Endocannabinoid system, how it affects various processes, and an economical, safe, and legal alternative to CBDs.
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*This broadcast is not meant to diagnose, treat, prevent, or cure any disease.
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This episode contains the audio from three episodes of our video series on YouTube and Facebook. If you're new to Neural Balance with Anandanol, this is the place to start.
The three included episodes are:
1 - Education Series - Getting Started
*If you just ordered or are curious about Neural Balance with Anandanol, think of this as your Quick Start Guide.
2 - Education Series - The Storm Before the Calm
*Thankfully, it's temporary and is often followed by great results.
3- Education Series - Contraindications & FAQs Is Neural Balance for autism?
*Can I take Neural Balance with other supplements? These are just a few of the questions we get, but they are the most common.
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Please join us and our special guest Kristin Gonzalez, President of Autism Hope Alliance.
Kristin has some great updates and exciting new things in the works. We LOVE Autism Hope Alliance and are proud Silver Plus Sponsors.
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*This broadcast is not meant to diagnose, treat, prevent, or cure any disease.
