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For some, burnout feels like an unravelling - a slow, creeping dissolution where the threads of your life and identity loosen and fray until you are completely undone.
For others, it’s a breaking point - a sharp, sudden, collapse where everything shatters all at once. It doesn’t just kill physical vitality it also guts the entire internal mechanism of us. Like lifting the hood off a car and finding no engine. There’s nothing, a void, which feels very shameful and fragile to those who have defined themselves by performance and always had the ability to bounce back.
Driven by extensive rumination both burnout and shame thrive in silence.
Stories are often how we create shape from the mess, they turn shame into something softer; something shared. They are how we make sense of the world, and often how we survive it. Giving us the power to hold what feels unholdable and ultimately creating a space where someone else can say, “me too”.
And sometimes what is required isn’t the courage to keep it all together, but to surrender and come apart.
Recovery is messy, non-linear but also deeply creative.
This is where the feature maker Hana Walker-Brown finds herself in this tender and intimate programme, sifting through the fragments, the scattered pieces of a life upended, considering how to start putting it back together.
With contributions from Luca and Theo Walker-Brown, Hana’s swimming companions Zoë and Gabby, Dr Sophie Mort, Dr Aaron Balick, Andrew Tobert and Services Director for Calm Wendy Robinson.
With thanks to Kenwood Ladies Pond and Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM)
Featuring the use of "Prayer" by PJ Harvey
Produced and presented by Hana Walker-Brown
Sound design and original music by Hana Walker-Brown
Executive Producer: Anishka Sharma
Mix and Mastering: Peregrine Andrews
A Reduced Listening production for BBC Radio 4
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Distracted, privatised, enchanted - do you ever think about how you listen? For the last 20 years, sound anthropologist Dr Tom Rice has been collecting different ways of listening from the world’s leading sound experts. He’s gathered more than 100 – some of these may be quite familiar, others will definitely surprise you.
We are at a critical moment when it comes to listening. The world is increasingly busy with sound, and it’s placing more and more demands on our ears. There’s an awareness that our culture and economic circumstances influence our perception, concern about growing pressures on our attention, and anxiety about our relationship to the environment. With the pace at which technology is developing, can we even be sure of what it is we’re listening to?
We need to be skilful and agile listeners. By recognising the vast scope and extraordinary complexity of listening, we can develop our awareness and sharpen our perception, helping us to survive and even thrive in the complex sound world of the 21st century.
Contributors: Bernd Brabec, University of Innsbruck; Ruth Herbert, University of Kent and City University; Dylan Robinson, University of British Columbia.
Special thanks to: Michel Chion – semantic listening; Martin Daughtry – palimpsestic listening; Michael Gallagher, Jonathan Prior, Martin Needham and Rachel Holmes – embodied listening, expanded listening; Stefan Helmreich – soundstate; David Huron – ecstatic listening; James M. Kopf – anal listening; Pierre Schaeffer – acousmatic listening; Murray Schafer, David Toop – clairaudience; Kai Tuuri – critical listening.
Written by Tom Rice and Ben LewisProduced by Eve Streeter and Tom RiceSound design by David ThomasMusic by Max WalterA Raconteur Studios production for BBC Radio 4
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What drives us? What makes us who we are? For one of the BBC’s most experienced foreign correspondents, the multi-award-winning Mike Thomson, it was a near-death experience in Australia’s worst natural disaster this century. Having been kicked out of school at 17 for refusing to cut his hair, Mike opts to go travelling. With an older family friend, Mick Kendall, he journeys overland from Ivybridge in Devon to Australia’s 'top end' via Turkey, Afghanistan, India, Burma and Indonesia. Mike arrives in Darwin in December 1974. However, the search for fun and adventure with Mick and their new friend, Daryl Johnson, turns to terror when an “evil wind” known as Cyclone Tracy strikes on Christmas Eve and flattens the city in one night. For days Mike’s parents think their youngest child is "presumed dead" His name is on a list of causalities when in fact Mike was being well looked after as a refugee and evacuated to a farm in Western Australia. Why the confusion? Who is this ‘other’ Thomson? Now, 50 years on, Mike returns to Darwin to answer these questions and search for the two friends who helped him through the ordeal that shaped him.
For more stories like this, search for Illuminated on BBC Sounds. It was produced by Ed Prendeville for BBC Audio Wales and Jane Ray for Cat Flap Media. Sound design is by John Wakefield, original music by Ben Goodman. This edition of ILLUMINATED was written and presented by Mike Thomson.
With thanks to Rod Louey-Gung on behalf of the Northern Territories Museum for use of their archive.
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It's the most intimate moment of the Radio 4 schedule: The late-night Shipping Forecast, a prelude to the close-down of the station, read every night at 00:48. But who is really listening along, and why? Guided by Radio 4 Announcer Al Ryan, we'll cross the world to meet the people who find comfort in this unique broadcast for a variety of reasons.
Produced by Luke Doran
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Ceefax has just reached its 50th birthday, and to celebrate this unique golden anniversary, the BBC's once-mighty teletext news service is receiving the greatest gift of all - the gift of life, courtesy of the greatest novelty politician in the omniverse, Count Binface.
For eight years, Binface has pledged in his election manifestos to bring back Ceefax and now, at last, the BBC is granting his wish. With just one small hitch - it's on the radio. Still, you've got to start somewhere.
Featuring the stellar talents of Rory Bremner, Emma Clarke and Jon Harvey, get ready for an aural event like no other, with the unlikely return to the airwaves of the much-missed Ceefax. Or should that be Hearfax?
Starring: Rory Bremner, Emma Clarke, Leah Marks and Jon HarveyAnd introducing Ceefax, 4-Tel and The Oracle
Script Writers: Jon Harvey and Matthew CrosbySound Design: Tony ChurnsideProducer: Jon HarveyIllustration: Dan FarrimondExecutive Producer: Eloise Whitmore
A Naked production for BBC Radio 4
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Every year's end, as the days shorten and the nights grow darker, you might be fortunate enough to hear a distinctive knock at your door. Upon opening it, you'll be met with a group of Guisers - men in disguise - here to perform their mystery play, part of the ancient Mumming tradition. There's the Enterer In, Saint George, The Prince of Paradise, The King, The Old Woman, The Quack Doctor, Beelzebub, Little Johnny Jack with his wife on his back, Little Devilly Doubt, The Groom, and The Horse.
And it's the vision of The Horse At The Door that has stayed with Isy since childhood.
Isy hasn’t seen the Guisers for over 30 years, but that horse and the clack of its jaw frightened her so much, she thinks of it often.
In The Horse At The Door, Isy will see if she can come face to face with her fears and see whether that black painted skull still holds the same magic and power. She will speak to local pub owners and residents about The Guisers habit of bursting in, to the folklorist Richard Bradley about the Derbyshire traditions of mumming and guising, to the psychotherapist Jane Watson about why we enjoy being scared, and to The Winster Guisers themselves about the traditions they are keeping alive – and the children they are scaring.
Can Isy finally look that horse in its red bulging eyes?
The Horse At The Door is written and presented by Isy SuttieThe Music is by Jane Watkins and Isy SuttieThe Sound Design is by Jane WatkinsIt is produced by Laura GrimshawIt’s a Mighty Bunny production for BBC Radio 4.
With thanks to The Winster Guisers, Richard Bradley, Jane Watson, Colette Dewhurst at The Barley Mow, The Miners Standard and - especially - The Old Horse.
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The best stories have a certain WTF factor.. a weird little fact that draws you in…something you can’t ignore because it’s so contrary to what you previously thought.
So it was for Geoff Lloyd when he heard that the story that Karaoke was invented in Stockport, by a charismatic shopkeeper called Roy Brooke who claimed the Japanese adopted his discovery and marketed it around the world.
Geoff’s a massive Karaoke fan and remembers his halcyon days in the 90s, judging karaoke competitions in the town with his friend Caroline Aherne, so he sets off on a quest to get to the bottom of this tale; a quest that sees him chat to Stockport hitmakers Blossoms, comedy writing legend Craig Cash and a Japanese academic said to have backed up Roy's crazy claim.
On the way he discovers a town so in love with Karaoke that it's home to the country's only dedicated league, a secretive world jampacked with big voices and human drama. 12 pub teams meet every Monday for chance to be champions of the New Stockport Fun Karaoke League. But have some of the teams starting taking it too seriously and forgotten about the fun?
Will Geoff track down Roy Brooke and hear his side of the story and find out why Karaoke has taken root so strongly in Stockport?
Presenter: Geoff LloydProducer: Catherine MurrayAdditional recording by George HerdProduction Co-ordination: Mica NepomucenoStudio mix: Nat Stokes Executive Producer: Richard McIlroy
Featuring Blossoms, Craig Cash, Professor Hiroshi Ogawa, and Matt Alt, author of Pure Invention: How Japanese Culture Conquered the World.
Special thanks to the Blossoms Bees and The Barnhouse teams and all the members of the New Stockport Karaoke Fun League
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For 2000 years beneath layer upon layer of peat, the remains of two bodies - a man and a woman - lay buried in the earth. Within 12 months of each other, they were discovered on Lindow Moss, the cut-over peat bog in Cheshire.
It's now 40 years since the remains of Lindow Man were found, the best-preserved bog body ever discovered in the UK. A year before that, the skull of Lindow Woman was found, with major ramifications for a modern-day mystery. We still don’t know who these people were or in the case of Lindow Man, why he met his violent death. Was it ritual sacrifice to the gods, private scores settled or a public execution?
Their spirits remain in the place of their burial - a small corner of Cheshire filled with myth, mystery and history. Together with one of the original peat cutters at that time, the first journalist on the site, a professor of pre-history, a conservator and material from archive, we tell the story of this remarkable archaeological discovery.
And a slight twist - listening in on proceedings are Lindow Man and Lindow Woman. What might they make of the celebrations around the anniversary of the bodies in the bog?
Contributors: Melanie Giles Professor in European Prehistory, University of Manchester; Stephen Dooley, former peat cutter; Rachel Pugh, writer and journalist; Velson Horie, conservation consultant and the late Rick Turner (archive) former County Archaeologist, Cheshire. Lindow Man is played by Fisayo Akinawe and Lindow Woman by Eve Shotton.
Produced and written by Geoff BirdExecutive Producer: Mel HarrisSound Engineer: Eloise WhitmoreMusic composed & performed by Laetitia Stott & mixed and mastered by Geoff SouthallA Sparklab production for BBC Radio 4
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Mike is a carpenter, a boat builder, and a keen amateur sailor. Now, in his 60s he feels the time has come for a big adventure, so he signs on as crew for a transatlantic sailing voyage. But when the skipper turns to tyranny and his only ally on board loses touch with reality, Mike is faced with his own demons.
There's no storm, no shipwreck, no sea monster - only three men trapped together, each battling for their own sanity.
With only the endless sea surrounding them, Mike soon realises he is the only one who can pull the crew and himself out of a very dangerous place. Will he surrender to the dark line that runs through all of us?
Produced by Guy NatanelExecutive Producers: Shannon Delwiche and Chris JonesOriginal Music by Pat Moran
A Sound and Bones production for BBC Radio 4
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Composer Aidan Tulloch is fascinated by the physical process of making music – but fears he knows very little. He gains a unique insight from some of the most precise and gifted technicians in the country – members of the Association of Blind Piano Tuners. Aidan traces their journey into this field, goes along to their annual curry lunch, and finds out why the highly skilled craft of piano tuning was once a popular career for blind and partially sighted people: now their numbers are dwindling. They also reflect on how we listen to and perceive sound and music, and the joy it brings.
Presenter: Aidan TullochProducers: Maryam Maruf and Emily WebbEditor: John GoudieMix: Giles Aspen
(Photo: Piano tuner Martin Locke tuning a piano. Credit: Maryam Maruf)
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The story of Anthony Ray Hinton who spent years on death row for crimes he didn't commit, with a soundtrack composed by Harvey Brough and performed by Vox Holloway Community Choir.
In June 1988, Mr Hinton was convicted of two murders, in one of the most shockingly cynical miscarriages of justice in US history. He spent the next 28 years on death row, before all charges were dropped and he was finally released in April 2015.
The Sun Does Shine is the title of his memoir, in which he tells how he found life and freedom on death row. His story reflects the compassion, faith and heroic courage of a remarkable man. In prison he befriended Henry Hays, a member of the Ku Klux Klan, who was convicted and eventually executed for a racist murder.
The unlikely friendship of Hinton and Hays lies at the heart of this story.
The Sun Does Shine features an extended interview with Hinton, in which he talks about how he survived years of imprisonment, facing the constant threat of execution, and how the multiple appeals launched by his lawyer Bryan Stevenson ultimately led to his release.
His words are accompanied by an oratorio composed by Harvey Brough, based on Hinton's memoir and performed by the Vox Holloway Community Choir. Vox Holloway’s work on The Sun Does Shine was supported by Arts Council England
Since leaving prison, Anthony Ray Hinton has worked tirelessly, alongside Bryan Stevenson, campaigning for the abolition of the death penalty and for reforms to the criminal justice and prison systems in America PRESENTER: Christina GillPRODUCERS: Abigail Morris and Sam Liebmann with Osman Teezo KargboCOMPOSER: Harvey BroughEXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Andrew Wilkie and Tricia ZipfelA Vox Holloway / Prison Radio Association production
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Are we ever really alone nowadays, what with the extraordinary velocity of contemporary social circulation, whether this be the madness of the crowds, or the relentless churn of social media? Does anyone really experience reclusion? A conscious choice to withdraw from the social realm. What would it be like?
For decades, Will Self lived his life as a very public figure. An acerbic satirist and giant man of letters he was constantly on the move, driven by his insatiable curiosity about the world. “I once flew to Scotland, climbed Ben Lomond, and flew back to London the same day”.
In a series of powerful soliloquies, Self reveals how he’s gradually withdrawn from the social realm. He began by abandoning acquaintances and remoter colleagues, then started cutting off friends, close colleagues, and eventually family.
“It’s been over a year since I’ve read a newspaper report, looked at a news website, or heard more than a three-minute news bulletin. Most days I see only my wife and youngest child who I live with.”
In this powerful piece of radio, Will Self reaches down to the very bottom of how the self is socially constructed – and then dismantles that scaffolding from around it, to see what’s still standing.
A half-hour that will leave the listener feeling as if they’ve been staring at their reflection for so long in a mirror, that this image appears totally uncanny to them.
Presenter: Will SelfProducer: Emily Williams
A Whistledown production for BBC Radio 4
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When Clive Hammond was 31, he had a cardiac arrest. His heart stopped for eight minutes. But he can't remember any of it.
What happens when the heart stops - and then what happens next?
Clive sets out to piece together what happened to him. He speaks to his wife Victoria about what went on while he was unconscious, and the impact it had on their lives. He compares notes with fellow cardiac arrest survivor Meg Fozzard about what it's like to have a cardiac arrest as a young person. Former head of first responders at London Ambulance Chris Hartley-Sharpe tells him what goes on in the body during a cardiac arrest, and how they can affect medical professionals afterwards. And he hears the incredible story of Steve Morris, who started carrying a defibrillator in his car after having a cardiac arrest - and then used it to help save someone else's life.
Presenter: Clive HammondProducer: Lucy BurnsEditor: Clare FordhamTechnical production: Richard Hannaford
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In 1980, Prestonwood Mall in Dallas contacted the Center for UFO Studies (CUFOS) with a unique request. It was the opening weekend of The Empire Strikes Back, and the mall’s marketing team wanted an additional attraction. Sensing an opportunity, John P Timmerman, the owner of a family air-conditioning business in Ohio and a dedicated volunteer at CUFOS, packed his car with an eye-catching collection of UFO photographs and embarked on a cross-country journey for the weekend.
What began as a simple photography exhibit turned into a 12year research expedition across the malls of America.
In front of plexiglass panels, between the skylights and shiny floors, Timmerman interviewed curious shoppers with stories to tell. What he captured on his small tape recorder was the “raw material of ufology” - candid, first-hand accounts of strange lights, silver discs, and close encounters.
Between 1980 and 1992, Timmerman recorded 1,179 witness reports across 120 tapes that cover every aspect of the UFO phenomena. The collection is considered one of the largest ever put together by a single investigator.
John P Timmerman spent years travelling far from his quiet family life in the Midwest searching for insights into our place in the universe. What he found, among the hum of escalators and muzak, was connection - or ‘contact’ - with thousands of ordinary people, all searching for the same thing.
Produced, Edited & Sound Designed by Oliver SandersArchive Digitisation & Co-Production by James TimmermanExecutive Producer: Lucia ScazzocchioSpecial thanks to Dr Mark Rodeghier, Dr Michael Swords, Dr Michael West, The Center For UFO Studies, The Timmerman Family, Dominic De Vere, Francesca Thakorlal, Ben Plumb, Hannah Kemp-Welch.
A Social Broadcasts production for BBCRadio 4
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On their last tour, the award-winning folk band The Young'uns took with them an old suitcase, some blank luggage tags and marker pens, and asked audience members to fill the case with ideas for songs. Hundreds poured in with stories of hope, remembrance, love, grief and joy. In this programme, singer-songwriter Sean Cooney opens the case to find a myriad of voices all waiting...wanting to be heard.
He follows three stories of love... from a couple who found each other in their 70s through their shared passion of Middlesbrough Football Club, to a story of love, loss and renewal on the banks of the Thames. He meets up with Angela to hear a tale of how some borrowed boots outside a disco led to several dates, a marriage and three children. Inspired by this wonderful story, Sean writes a song to surprise the man with the borrowed boots - Angela's now-husband.
Presenter: Sean CooneyProducer: Elizabeth Foster
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Alongside their A-levels, five 17 year-olds volunteer for six months at a hospice in Surrey. These are young people who hope to work in healthcare one day and, for one reason or another, feel drawn to helping others.
Their hopes and fears are similar to most people who've never been to a hospice, which includes their parents, and they have have no idea what they'll encounter. Above all, there are worries that it will be very sad, and too much for people of their age to handle.
Pretty quickly, they get to know the nurses at the hospice, who have a great sense of humour and are not in the least bit despairing. The volunteers feel awkward at first, and scared of getting things wrong, but with the nurses' encouragement, they begin talking with patients, feeding them, moving them, brushing their teeth, and helping them to the toilet.
Little by little, they get to know patients, gain confidence and maturity and start to form a new understanding of dying and death.
With many thanks to the staff of the Princess Alice Hospice and to Lizzie Leigh in particular.
Presented by Farida AbdelhamidProduced by Tim MoorhouseA Just Radio production for BBC Radio 4
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Why are all the bees dying? Simon Mitambo, an expert from Kenya's so-called 'Land of Bees', travels from his own affected community to huge industrial farms in search of answers. It is a journey both planetary and personal: without bees, can Simon's world survive?
Presenter: Simon MitamboProducer: Lucy TaylorField producer: Mel Myendo Researcher: Georgie StylesExec Producer: Dan AshbySound design and mixing: Jarek Zaba
A Smoke Trail Production for BBC Radio 4.
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Hervé lost a leg in a motorbike accident. On the eve of the operation, he made a deal with God: “If I walk again, I'll go to Santiago.” He did walk again, but not on pilgrimage. Instead, he got caught up in his business affairs, had a burn out, tried to kill himself and spent several months in a psychiatric hospital before he decided to keep his side of the bargain. He set out, with crutches and a prosthetic leg, for Santiago de Compostela, a journey of 1,920 kilometres from his home in Brittany in north west France to the cathedral that contains the relics of Saint James at the tip of north west Spain. The experience utterly changed him. It was, he says, a resurrection. He is now embarking on a second pilgrimage which will cover almost twice the distance; from Rome to Santiago de Compostela. John Laurenson walks with him for a couple of days to hear his story and talk about life, God, pilgrimage, about Luther's criticism – that they are a waste of time - and the sacrifice they can represent for his family of a wife and four children. John also talks to him about how, in a part of the world where religious observance has become the affair of a small minority, going on pilgrimages in Europe has never been more popular with new routes opening all the time.
This episode was first broadcast on BBC World Service on 24 May, 2024.
Producer / Presenter: John Laurenson
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Did you ever have a recurring dream that you think might just be a memory? Or a nightmare so vivid that it could almost be real?
John Meagher has. He’s been dreaming about a group of devil worshippers who may or may not have terrorised his home town of Newry, Northern Ireland since the early 90s.
John takes us on a funny, fearful and surprising journey of discovery across Northern Ireland to uncover the truth behind the story of "The Whitehoods" of Newry and discovers that the "Satanic Panic" wasn't exclusive to his home town.
But what was really going on? And why do so many towns in the North have a similar story?
Can John find out the truth and lay these memories to rest? Is there any truth to be found at all in this land of saints, scholars and spoofers?
For the sake of his sleeping patterns and his marriage, John is determined to find out.
A Fabel production for BBC Radio 4
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In an engaging programme full of beautiful music, Joanna Robertson eavesdrops on a cast of talented young opera singers from around the world, as they work on favourite arias to perfect the style of "bel canto" ("beautiful singing"). They have come to the bel canto summer school of the Georg Solti Accademia, in the small Italian seaside town of Castiglione della Pescaia in Tuscany. The academy was founded in memory of the legendary conductor who had his summer residence here. We listen in on the world-class students as they hone their bel canto technique with leading vocal coaches, opera singers and conductors.
"Bel canto" is now on UNESCO's list of Intangible Cultural Heritage. It is both a style of singing and a repertoire. It requires vocal artists to produce a penetrating yet luxuriantly smooth, and very expressive sound - often with virtuosic and dazzling runs of notes. Bel canto singing can be heard above an orchestra, without the help of amplification. It sounds effortless, but takes years to learn. It can be used for any style of music, but the repertoire most closely associated with it are operas by the nineteenth century Italian composers Rossini, Bellini and Donizetti. Joanna joins the young singers and their teachers to find out more about bel canto and to hear how this sound is produced.
Producers: Arlene Gregorius and Joanna RobertsonEditor: Penny MurphyProduction Coordinator: Maria Ogundele Sound mix: Andy Fell Photo of Rebecca Gulinello by Jennifer Lorenzini
With special thanks to Jonathan Papp, Artistic Director, and all at the Solti Accademia 2024Young artists heard in this programme:Eva Rae Martinez - SopranoRebecca Gulinello - SopranoAebh Kelly - SopranoClover Kayne - Mezzo SopranoXavier Hetherington - TenorOliver Heuzenroeder - Baritone
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