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June is Men's Mental Health Awareness Month. Mental health is a crucial aspect of overall well-being, yet men often face unique challenges and stigmas that prevent them from seeking the help they need.
We'll discuss:
The societal pressures and expectations that impact men's mental health.Common mental health issues men experience and how they manifest.Practical advice on how to seek help and support loved ones.Resources and practices for maintaining mental well-being.Let's break the silence together and create a culture where men's mental health is a priority.
Resources:
https://www.nami.org/988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Provides immediate 24/7 help over the phone, a directory for various other help-lines, and information on general lifelines and crisis support.https://headsupguys.org/Next Steps: Join the Community!Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts! -
Guest Katie Hallberg shares her journey of parenting her transgender son. She offers wisdom for all parents and gives us insight into the internal work that she had to do in order to achieve she and her husband's vision of keeping their family together across time and keeping their then-daughter, now-son, alive.
June is Pride Month which recognizes the impact that lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender individuals have had on history locally, nationally, and internationally. Pride Month is a time of celebration, reflection, and action, honoring the history of the LGBTQ+ movement and advocating for a more inclusive and equitable future.
Here are important statistics highlighting the mental health issues that LGBTQ young people face.
Resources:
The Genderbread Person
LGBTQ+ Mental Health Resources
LGBTQ+ Mental Health Resources Texas
LGBTQ+ Crisis Hotlines
Connect with Katie:
Instagram
Next Steps:Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts!
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We are often upset or in conflict because of something that we all unconsciously do because we, as humans, are meaning making machines. This episode explores what that is and steps to help gain clarity and awareness to have greater connection, peace, and less misunderstanding in our lives. Resources: Worksheet Next Steps:
Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts!
Today's Sponsor: https://realtyit.com/
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How do you feel about summers? While I love having more time with our kids and enjoy the slower pace, it also can be challenging with the lack of structure and lots of togetherness!
This episode will highlight 10 strategies to help your family have a successful summer!
Next Steps:Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts!
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I was excited to guest on Joy Johnson's podcast, The Journey to Becoming. Joy is using her platform to spotlight mental health this month for Mental Health Awareness Month after experiencing heartbreaking mental health trauma in her own family.
You can find Part 1 of our conversation here.
You can find Joy Johnson on Instagram.
Resources
NAMI Find a therapist Feelings and Needs List Mental Health Tracker/Daily Check-In Sheet Next Steps:Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts!
Thanks for listening!
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I was excited to guest on Joy Johnson's podcast, The Journey to Becoming. Joy is using her platform to spotlight mental health this month for Mental Health Awareness Month after experiencing heartbreaking mental health trauma in her own family.
Part 2 will be aired next Wednesday.
You can find Joy Johnson on Instagram.
Resources
NAMI Find a therapist Feelings and Needs List Mental Health Tracker/Daily Check-In Sheet Next Steps:Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistLeave a written review on Apple Podcasts!
Thanks for listening!
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In light of Mental Health Awareness Month, this episode explores the most commonly diagnosed mental health disorder, anxiety. We will talk about the different anxiety disorders, symptoms, causes, and treatment options. We will also talk about something you need to know about your anxiety AND something you can do to help it!
Next steps:
Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistReview this episode!
Thanks for listening!
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It is Mental Health Awareness Month and this episode explores what mental health is, how to identify if you or someone you know (including your child) might be struggling, ways to support your mental health, and next steps if you or a loved one needs support.
Resources:
Feelings List
Brené Brown Empathy Short
Next steps:
Join the Community!
Become a Modern Family Mental Health Insider!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistReview this episode!
Thanks for listening!
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Our lives are short and precious, but with the many tasks and demands of adulting (and parenting), it is easy to just push through the days in order to relax (and often numb out) in the evening. If you find yourself going through the motions but not feeling as joyful, present, or excited about life as you'd like to be, this episode offers strategies for helping you identify what you want life to look and feel like and how to make it happen.
Next steps:
Join the Facebook community!
Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistReview this episode!
Thanks for listening!
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If trauma has changed you, there is nothing wrong with you and you’re not doing it wrong. Trauma has an ongoing impact on how we think, how we perceive our world, and how we survive our present. This week on the podcast, we are talking about ten things I learned about trauma both from being a student at Columbine High School during the shooting and from my practice as a trauma therapist. This year marks the 25th anniversary of the shooting. It is my hope to share some of the insights from my own experience with you to support your own journey through trauma.
Resources:
The Body Keeps the Score
Next steps:Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistReview this episode!
Thanks for listening!
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We all go through tough times. When we are having a hard time, it is easy to want to numb out, withdraw, or ruminate. This episode provides strategies to help you navigate the difficult or uncertain seasons of life.
Next steps:Visit me at www.jenalley.comFollow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapistReview this episode!Thanks for listening!
Resource:
Episode 6: Emotions: What They Are, Why They Matter, and How to Navigate Them
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In a world that values productivity and checking things off of the to do list, it can feel like we don't have time to rest. Studies show, though, that we don't have time NOT to rest.
Rest (while we are awake) can take many forms, but the main idea is that we move from an external focused state where we are DOING to an inward state where we are BEING. Whether it is active rest or more passive rest like sitting on the couch meditating, it is vital for brain health as well as boosting creativity, problem solving, and energy that we take breaks to rest.
If rest feels weird or unsafe for you, it may take practice getting used to not actively doing something or taking in information from a screen to distract you from your internal world. You also may need support from an experiential therapist to help move rest from feeling less okay to more okay.
Please also listen to Episode 6 which explores emotions as well as Episode 4 on self-compassion for more information.
You also might check out this Ted Talk and article on the seven types of rest that every person needs.
Next steps:
Visit me at www.jenalley.com
Follow me on Instagram @jen.alley.therapist
Review this episode!
Thanks for listening!
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In this episode, we explore the pathway to connection and leaning into vulnerability in order to feel less alone and more fulfilled in our relationships.
Nearly 60% of the US adult population reports feeling lonely on a regular basis. Loneliness may be a huge public health threat regarding the impact it has on our minds and bodies.
In thinking about the causes of loneliness, I think that America’s value of rugged individualism in addition to social media, technology, and busyness are all contributing factors. We often don’t have time or make time for connection and when we do, it is shallow.
It takes spending both quality and quantity time with people to really build relationship, to trust, and to know the ins and outs of one another’s lives. For those of us who were in college pre-iPhone, think back to your days at university. If you had a core group of friends, you likely spent tons of time studying, making food, exercising, and just hanging out with one another. This led to closeness and deep connection.
While adulthood already presents challenges to this type of relationship because of increasing responsibilities and less dedicated time, I think the iPhone, streaming services like Netflix, and technology at large has made us even more distant and less connected to our neighbors and community members. Social media also paints idyllic pictures of the avatar that people want to present to the world- a polished version of oneself. Consequently, we are often comparing our insides to others’ outsides and are even less likely to be open and vulnerable with others. And, without quality time and trust, it is even less likely that we will be vulnerable in the relationships that we do have.
I believe that one of the anecdotes to this is being more real and honest about the things that are happening in our lives and who we are. It takes courage to be vulnerable or to be the first person to say, “I am struggling.” Or, “This hard thing is happening.” But when it is met with compassion and connection, we feel less alone, more connected, happier, and healthier.
Today’s episode on A Mental Health Podcast, Between the Two of Us, explores the power of vulnerability in our relationships. It can be found on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
Resources:
Brené Brown's Ted Talk, The Power of Vulnerability
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The "window of tolerance" is a concept commonly used in psychology and mental health to describe an optimal state of arousal where a person is best able to manage stressors and emotions effectively. It's essentially a zone where you feel safe, regulated, and capable of dealing with whatever life throws your way.
Our window fluctuates based on many factors and se all move outside of our window of tolerance at times. Certain emotions or situations may cause you to repeatedly move outside of your window. Techniques like mindfulness, grounding exercises, and therapy can help you widen your window of tolerance and develop resilience in the face of adversity.
Resources:
Window of Tolerance Image and Description (NICABM)
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If you lived to be 78, the average age of death, how many years do you have left? That might sound morbid, but I think there is something powerful about helping us to prioritize and be intentional with our lives and relationships when we are reminded of its brevity.
Many of the things that we want for our lives require us stepping outside of our comfort zone. Most things that are worth doing and having (from a good relationship to scaling a mountain to finally owning that dream lake house) come through intention, hard work, and some discomfort.
What is important to you? As Mary Oliver surmises, “Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon? Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one and precious life?”
If you want help identifying what is important to you and how to be more intentional, here is a free resource for you!
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Child sexual abuse is a significant health issue with lasting impact for survivors. Over 90% of perpetrators are someone that child knows and is familiar with. We are all responsible for teaching our children about their bodies, boundaries, and creating as much safety as possible within our own homes and communities. This week’s podcast is all about how to talk with your children about their bodies, ok versus not ok touch, body boundaries, and helping you as the caregiver identify grooming behaviors.
Resources & Further Reading:
https://www.cfchildren.org/wp-content/uploads/resources/child-abuse-prevention/docs/all-ages-sexual-abuse-prevention-conversation-guide.pdf
https://www.rainn.org/articles/how-can-i-protect-my-child-sexual-assault
https://www.safeaustin.org/get-help/child-safety/
https://bravehearts.org.au/about-child-sexual-abuse/what-are-the-signs-of-child-sexual-abuse/
https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/can/CSA-Factsheet_508.pdf
https://childmind.org/article/10-ways-to-teach-your-child-the-skills-to-prevent-sexual-abuse/
On Instagram:
@cacoftexas
@jennaquinnlove
Books:
Let's Talk About Body Boundaries, Consent and Respect: Teach children about body ownership, respect, feelings, choices and recognizing bullying behaviors
My Body Belongs To Me From My Head to My Toes
Body Boundaries Make Me Stronger
Yes! No! A First Conversation About Consent
Body Safety Book for Kids
Next Steps:
You can find me at jenalley.com or follow me @jen.alley.therapist on Instagram.
Please be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode.
Leave a review so more friends can join us!
Share this episode with a friend.
Thanks for listening!
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We all have behaviors and symptoms that we don't feel serve us and that we wish we could stop doing or get rid of. Whether it is sabotaging relationships despite wanting closeness, overreacting in specific situations, or experiencing anxiety, hyper-vigilance, people pleasing, or any other symptom or behavior, somehow they make sense or have coherence within our systems.
When we are triggered or have a symptom or behavior that is consistently coming up, it is important to practice curiosity instead of judgement, use "It makes sense..." to explore instead of feeling like we shouldn't be doing it or having the feeling, and practice compassion for ourselves/for the part that is struggling, and finally, look for experiences that are a mismatch to what we are expecting to have happen. Our brain learns through experiences. The most important first step, though, is to recognize that the repetitive symptom or behavior has deeper roots than whatever is happening in that current moment. Therapy may be needed to help you uncover its origins.
Next Steps:
You can find me at jenalley.com or follow me @jen.alley.therapist on Instagram.
Please be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode.
Leave a review so more friends can join us!
Share this episode with a friend.
Thanks for listening!
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Trigger warning: This episode includes dialogue around sensitive issues including childhood abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, rape, suicidal ideation and suicide. Please take care of yourself and seek appropriate help if you need support.
Did you experience childhood trauma or abuse? Adverse childhood experiences are defined as traumatic events that happen between ages one and seventeen.
They include:
Physical abuseSexual abuseEmotional abuseEmotional neglectPhysical neglectMentally ill, depressed, or suicidal person in the homeDrug addicted or alcoholic family memberWitnessing domestic violence Loss of a parent to death or abandonment by parental divorceIncarceration of any family member for a crimeResearch shows that these experiences have a profound impact on both mental and physical health throughout the lifespan. The CDC shares that 61% of adults had at least one ACE and 16% experienced four or more ACEs. Last year alone, there were 3.5 million reports of child abuse reported in the United States.
I am so grateful to author and activist Bess Hilpert for sharing her story of childhood abuse and trauma as well as the healing journey she has been on. Bess is passionate about bringing awareness to the impact of ACEs and is making it her mission to give permission to others to share their story by sharing her own.
Resources:
Finding I: A Journey of Repair by Bess Hilpert
Adverse Childhood Experiences Questionnaire
FindingI.org
Subscribe to Bess's newsletter
Sponsor for today's podcast: RealtyIT
Next Steps:
You can find me at jenalley.com or follow me @jen.alley.therapist on Instagram.
Please be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode.
Leave a review so more friends can join us!
Share this episode with a friend.
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Every couple (and relationship) has conflict. Many times, we don't act how we want to or may feel like we turn into a different version of ourselves when conflict happens. For example, we may rage or withdraw, we may shut down or move into people pleasing.
Often, when we have an oversize reaction to the situation at hand, it is because of information from our history or family of origin that is getting tugged on (even if we aren't aware of it).
This episode dives into Terry Real's work (he is the founder of Relational Life Therapy). We explore the parts of us that often take over during conflict or when our bodies and brains are perceiving something as unsafe, and we talk about what we can do to have healthier, more constructive conflict and connection with our partner.
Resources:
I want to be closer to my partner! - this PDF download gives research-backed actionable ideas of what to do and what not to do in your relationship to nurture the relationship. It also includes a curated list of further reading and podcast episodes by experts in the field of romantic relationships.
Terry Real's Time Out Rules
My New Website: www.jenalley.com
Today's sponsor: https://realtyit.com/ - They specialize in websites for real estate but can also create custom websites for companies in any industry. They just created my new, custom website from scratch. Check it out here!
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Do you feel like you and your partner have fallen into routines of co-managing but you are missing that connection and spark? Are you wanting to feel closer to your partner? If so, this episode is for you.
Using research from the Gottman Institute's Love Lab, we will explore both the do's and dont's to a healthy, happy relationship.
We know from the Gottman Institute that emotionally disengaged couples divorce an average of 16.2 years after their wedding. BUT we also know from their research that connection, trust and happy relationships are made in the many small interactions and moments of our lives. The great news is that with intentionality, we can use these small moments and interactions to warm the relationship back up.
I want to feel closer to my partner! I have created a free download for you that has specific and practical ideas for creating more connection and intimacy in your relationship. It also has links to additional resources that will be helpful for you to read and listen to.
Additional resource: Sound Relational House
Be sure to follow me on Instagram @Jen.alley.therapist
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