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What do you do when your super sweet, super thoughtful wedding present reveals that your man has been WAITING for the perfect moment to leave you for some mystery girl? Then, look, Tom Cruise will die making these Mission Impossible movies for us some day, AND IT WILL BE WORTH IT. It means it's time for Cruise Ships 2 Part III (or is it Cruise Ships 3 Part 2?). Mission Impossible! Interview with the Vampire! Collateral! A Few Good Men!
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What do you do when your contributions to rock and roll are being overlooked by your bandmate? Do you confess your inventions sorta suck? Then, there's a new Superman show, which means it's time to talk about all our favorite Clarks and Loises!
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What do you do when your cagey SO has to disappear for days at a time, and when you press them for explanation, all they can ask is that you "trust them"? Why, you go downstairs and marry them of course! Then, dust off your fedoras, there's a new Indiana Jones movie in the theatres, which means it's time to talk Whip Ships! Batman Returns! Iron Man II! Scott Pilgrim vs. the World! Toy Story! Tenacious D!
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What do you do when you find yourself re-embroiled in Meg-related attacks? You suit up and fight that thing: what other choice ya got? Then, Asteroid City is in wide release so it's time to stare dead-eyed directly into the camera and ship all things Wes Anderson.
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How can you even go on when a swing dancer at a wedding flips your wife like 9 times? You can't sleep! Your neighbor sends a pig wearing a mask into your home through the doggie door! Your life is in shambles, which means: you're a Tim Robinson character. (It's so good to have new I Think You Should Leave.) Then, the new Pixar film Elemental looks like shit, but it is out now, which means we're talking Elemental Ships! Avatar the Last Airbender! Star Wars: The High Republic! Little Nemo The Dream Master! Sky High! The X-Men!
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What do you do when you should be fighting vampires, but instead you have to be the cool teacher? Or maybe the negligent, absentee teacher? Look, we don't say it a lot, but: maybe call the cops? Then, Diablo IV is out and offering countless dungeons through which to crawl, which means we're going Crawl Ships! Girls! Secretary! 12 Minutes! The Superior Spider-Man! Star Wars!
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Star Wars Jedi Survivor is out today and it looks like it's good, so the Shipple Dips are talking Survivor Ships!
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What do you do when you're in an intense climbing situation with another person and it turns out they were totally boning your ex? You swallow your pride and SURVIVE. Then, Chavalier is in theatres which means the Dips are shipping Violin Ships! Who will wind up with Dr. Michael Morbius this week?
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What do you do when Colin forces you to consider a hypothetical situation from the perspective of a Tim Robinson character? Then, Chupa is out on Netflix, which I guess means it's time for Suck Ships? Ships that suck! Movies that suck! Episodes of good TV shows that suck! And, inevitably, a living vampire man who sucks... blood, that is!
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When you see a picture of yourself, but it's been yassified, does that feel... aspirational to you? Or critical? Or just nutso? Then, Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves is out in theatres, which means we are talking about Thief Ships!
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We're going back to Woodsborrow! Part 2 of the Scream Ship-A-Thon, finds the the Shipple Dips revisiting everyone in the original Scream trilogy, and pairing them up with their perfect mates.
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There's a new Scream movie in theatres, which means we're taking a "stab" at a Colombo Ghostface cold open. It goes great! Then, in part one, we find ships for all the new kids introduced in Scream 4 and Scream 5.
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What do you do when you left for the summer, and your SO ends up hooking up with your best friend? You dump him, right? Then what if he and the friend insist on telling you about everything and then dating in front of you FOREVER? Or, y'know, 'til next summer. Then, Creed III is out in theatres, which means... Patrick and Ryan spend a lot of time talking about Ant-Man and the Wasp Quantumania. Oh, and everyone watches the Creed music video for With Arms Wide Open. Look, it's sort of a weird episode.
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What do you do when you're jealous AND a big ol' creep? Maybe you don't murder the person you're jealous of! Then, Cocaine Bear is out in theatres, which means it's finally time to do Cocaine Ships! Oh Hello! Boogie Nights! Breaking Bad! Legends and Lattes!
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We have a format. Such and such happens, but you are such and such - what do you do? Then Colin comes in here, and poses a "would you rather?" and frankly, no one knows what to do. Would you rather have sex with someone who has to poop or would you rather just not have sex? Then, the Winnie the Pooh horror movie, Blood and Honey (which should really be spelled "Blood and Hunny" now that I'm thinking of it), is released today which means it's time to talk Public Domain Ships! Sports Night! Little Women! Dick Tracy! Wizard of Oz! Sherlock Holmes!
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What if you had a one-of-a-kind talent, and some international adventure dude took advantage of that gift to steal some fancy tiny boat? Start a life of crime? Then, Magic Mike's Last Dance is out today, so it's time to discuss Last Dance Ships!
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What do you do when the outsider your brother brought into the family turns on everyone and your brother is nowhere to be found? You consider betraying everyone too, right? (This one's about wrestling.) Then, the new M. Night Knock at the Cabin is in theatres which means it's time to discuss Cabin ships! WWE! Gerald's Game! Misery! Fargo! Little Darlings!
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MILF Manor. Should be illegal. We gotta talk about it.
Then, Shotgun Wedding comes to Prime Video today, which means it's time to discuss Shotgun Ships! Kill Bill! Death Proof! Silence of the Lambs! Animal Crossing! Doom Eternal! Fallout 4! Supernatural!
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What do you do when you've been betrayed by your alien parasite / lover? Oh, you think it's not as big a deal as being betrayed by your friends and cohosts, who never had your back about how Venom is a modern superhero-horror-romance classic??? Look, there are a lot of hurt feelings so Let's Sort Them Out. Then, it's a new year, which means a new commitment shipping. The Shipple Dips share their resolutions for the new year (some of which are ship related, and some speak to fundamental needs for change) before talking about some "new' ships. The OC! Bridget Jones! Marvel's Midnight Suns! Crisis Core Final Fantasy VII!
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What do you do when you know, FOR SURE, that you've seen a ghost, but your husband is totally razzing you for it at a dinner party? You assume that your husband is a killer, collet the baby, and get the hell out of the house. Then, Black Panther Wakanda Forever is out in theatres, so we're talking Forever Ships! 30 Rock! Star Trek: The Next Generation! The Sandlot! Devil in Ohio! The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power!
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