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Male survivors often try to forget or bury their experiences of abuse and use a range of strategies to block out the memories and feelings. These can look like drug and alcohol use, gambling, workaholism, and sex addictions… but frequently, they don't make the link between what happened to them as children or young guys, and their current ways of managing their life.
The tactics that abusers use mean that survivors often carry heavy legacies, like being made to feel complicit and responsible for aspects of the abuse, and being forced to keep the abuse secret in order to protect others. This often results in feelings of powerlessness, anger, shame and self-blame.
Managing these burdens requires - in the words of psychologists Sophie Reid and Jace Cannon Brookes - “ingenious survival”. The survivors in this episode share some of their survival strategies.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Shane Greentree (SAMSN), Adam S, Matthew O, Ryan C, Lindsay G, Clinical Psychologists Jace Cannon-Brooks & Sophie Reid (Birchtree Centre), Phillip S, Jarad G, Janet, Les S, Martin W, Craig Hughes-Cashmore (SAMSN, MD/CEO), Rae Boxwell (SAMSN, Counsellor), Brett Pickard (SAMSN, Eight-week Support Group facilitator), Pete R.
Resources for survivors:
https://www.samsn.org.au/recovery-and-healing/resources-for-survivors/
Thanks to:
All our wonderful interviewees!
Rob Carlton and Felicity Blake
Jace Cannon-Brooks & Sophie Reid, Birchtree Centre
Peter Bolam
And The National Redress SchemeMusic: Licensed via Audiio.com
SHANE - Sebastian Kauderer: Stay With Me (Instrumental)ADAM, MATTHEW, RYAN - Matthew Wright: ThemeJANET - Richard Smithson: Sometimes I Don't Know Who I AmMARTIN - The Future Reality: IridescentMARTIN - Marshall Usinger: Everything We Hoped ForAD / RIC HERBERT - Sebastian Kauderer: Two Big ReasonsLINDSAY, ADAM, LES, RYAN, PHIL (CLOSING) - Kevin Bean: WillowCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse (2013 - 2017) was established by the Commonwealth government to inquire into and report on responses by institutions (such as churches, schools, sporting groups and out-of-home care) to instances and allegations of child sexual abuse in Australia.
To be abused by someone who has authority over you causes unique impacts for men. A significant number of child sexual abuse survivors are abused outside the home by male authority figures working in trusted institutions, such as religious leaders, teachers or coaches. These figures were often role models. When survivors tried to disclose or report to authority figures they were often disbelieved, re-traumatised and sometimes re-abused. This abuse of power by perpetrators and institutions with authority has caused significant long-term harm, including fear, distrust, avoidance and sometimes hatred of authority that can lead to clashes with teachers, bosses and those in positions of power. This sets many men on a life course leading to denied opportunities, failure to achieve, and clashes with authority figures.
This episode shares some personal experiences of engagement with the Commission, as survivors spoke out to the community (often for the first time) about their abuse, their quest to be heard, and pursuit of justice and redress from the institution in which they were abused.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Lindsay G, Journalist Philippa McDonald, Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM, Professor Rita Shackel, Dr Judy Cashmore, Sheridan, Pete R.
Thanks to: Ric Herbert and Pearl Herbert for our ad
Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
LINDSAY - Farewell (Instrumental)AD / RIC HERBERT - Sebastian Kauderer: Two Big Reasons (Instrumental)PHILIPPA - Centre of the Sea: Condolences (Instrumental)PETE / FELICITY - Outland: Footprints (Instrumental)PHILIPPA - Sebastian Kauderer: Saving CarlCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
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The National Redress Scheme was established after the Royal Commission into Instutitional Responses to Child Sex Abuse recommended setting up a less traumatic, non-adversarial alternative to seeking compensation through the courts. Redress consists of three things: a monetary payment, access to counselling, and an opportunity to receive an apology from the institution, called a Direct Personal Response.
This ‘How-To’ explainer features a personal story from a survivor who sought redress through the National Redress Scheme. We'll also hear reflections from legal experts, a redress support service worker, and a counsellor. This episode is specifically designed to help potential applicants understand the scheme, its benefits, how to access it, and what they might be able to expect from the experience.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Tony Daly, Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM, Warren Strange (CEO, knowmore legal service), Elvis Caus (SAMSN, Planned Support Team Leader), Prue Gregory OAM (SAMSN, Policy, Advocacy & Stakeholder Relations Manager), Raelene Boxwell (SAMSN, Counsellor).
Thanks to:
The National Redress Scheme
Warren Strange and knowmore legal serviceMusic: Licensed via Audiio.com
TONY / FELICITY / ROB - Julep House: Wanted ManTONY / ELVIS - Julep House: Back to NormalPRUE - Philip Daniel: Against TransgressionELVIS / TONY - Carinthia: SelahCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
Child sexual abuse is a crime. What does criminal justice and punishment look like in the legal system? What is it like for survivors - or in this context, “victims” - to pursue criminal justice for sexual crimes against them? The second instalment of our two-part Justice episode shares direct personal experiences from two survivors: Adam and Jarad, with some insights from Professor Patrick O’Leary, Professor Rita Shackel, and Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Adam S, Professor Patrick O’Leary, Professor Rita Shackel, Jarad G, and Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM.
Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
ROB / OPENER - CAPE: Mandela Vs De KlerkADAM / FELICITY - Ivan Grigorashchuk: RainJARAD - Outland: The Scientist's DaughterCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
Child sexual abuse is a crime. What does criminal justice and punishment look like in the legal system? What is it like for survivors - or in this context, “victims” - to pursue criminal justice for the sexual crimes perpetrated against them?
The findings of the Royal Commission’s public hearing into the Criminal Justice System revealed confronting and problematic issues for survivors in accessing justice. Sometimes a personal sense of crime and punishment just doesn’t line up with the complexities, biases and pitfalls of the criminal legal system, leaving both victims and the public with the sickening impression that perpetrators “get away with it”. The necessity for changes to both reporting and prosecution which better serve the victims has now been acknowledged; we’ll hear from survivors and advocates about the way forward, and what needs to change.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Jarad G, Mark C, Craig Hughes-Cashmore (SAMSN MD/CEO), Dr Judy Cashmore, Adam S, Professor Patrick O’Leary, Professor Rita Shackel, Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM.
Mentioned in the episode: Caroline Taylor’s book ‘Surviving the Legal System’
Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
CRAIG / OPENER - The Brilliance: Violent LovingMARK - J Scott Rakozy: Memories AdriftCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
When someone trusts you with the knowledge of their abuse, how you react can have profound consequences and implications for their recovery. What are some helpful ways to respond to a disclosure?
A survivor's recovery journey can be greatly assisted by the care they receive from family, friends and other supporters… but this can be challenging at times for those close to a survivor.
It’s important to get the balance right in understanding and supporting a survivor, and attending to your own needs. In this episode we hear from partners and daughters about their journey with survivors on their path to recovery.
Featuring (in order of appearance): Janet, Missy, Tracy, Louise, Matthew O, Sheridan, Raelene Boxwell (SAMSN, Counsellor).
Resources for supporters:
https://www.samsn.org.au/resources-for-supporters/Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
OPENING / JANET - Matthew L. Fisher: The Hand Of A Child (Instrumental)TRACY & MATTHEW - Kevin Bean: Light Beneath UsJANET & MISSY - Nova: Glowing Lights (Instrumental)JANET - Ambient Endeavors: Ten Thirty One (Instrumental) -
The gender myths surrounding masculinity are often an obstacle to recovery for male survivors of child sexual abuse. Our society presents us with repetitive reinforcements of how men are supposed to look and act, especially with regard to emotional range and sexual intimacy. Those who don't fit the prevailing stereotypes for 'white male privilege' often face additional challenges. Men from First Nations, culturally diverse, or LGBTQI communities, men with disabilities and older men report that they often face additional discrimination and prejudice on top of the burdens of not conforming to dominant expectations about masculinity.
Strong messages like 'don't be a victim, be strong, don't show emotion, harden up, you should have been able to fight it off, boys don't cry…’ are still alive and well. What did survivors of child sexual abuse learn about masculinity myths that enabled them to unlock a new way of looking at life, manhood and themselves?
Featuring (in order of appearance): Mark W, Shane Greentree (SAMSN, Clinical Services Manager), Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM, Pete R, Phillip S, Professor Patrick O’Leary, Dr Judy Cashmore, Les S, Matthew O, Jarad G, Lindsay G.
Resources for survivors:
https://www.samsn.org.au/recovery-and-healing/resources-for-survivors/
Thanks to: Joe Jackson [http://joejackson.com/] and Maine Road Management for permission to quote the lyrics from Joe’s song ‘Real Men’.
Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
OPENING / MARK W - Julep House: MentoringLES - Ardie Son: Long Live the Sky Creatures: FolkloreLINDSAY - Seth Öphengon: Waking LifeCLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
On average, it takes 25.7 years for males to disclose their experience of childhood sexual abuse.
Why?
Evidence shows that males are less likely than females to tell someone what happened and seek help. They often try to block the feelings (like fear and shame) resulting from the abuse, and cope by isolating themselves from others, or self-medicating with drugs and alcohol. Very few have ever met another guy who has experienced child sexual abuse.
What is it like to tell someone about your experience of childhood sexual abuse? What sort of journey towards healing and justice starts when you are finally able to verbalise what happened? What do the signs of distress look like for male survivors, and if someone does disclose, how should you respond?
Featuring (in order of appearance): Martin W, Commissioner Robert Fitzgerald AM, Les S, Lindsay G, Shane Greentree (SAMSN, Clinical Services Manager), Jarad G, Raelene Boxwell (SAMSN, Counsellor), Professor Rita Shackel, Matthew O, Professor Patrick O’Leary, Dr Judy Cashmore, Ryan C, Tony D,
Resources for survivors:
https://www.samsn.org.au/recovery-and-healing/resources-for-survivors/
Music: Licensed via Audiio.com
OPENING / MARTIN - Luis Berra: Dancing Michelangelo (Instrumental)CLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental) -
1 in 6 Australian men will experience sexual abuse, usually as children or adolescents. Survivors of child sexual abuse often speak of feeling like their identity was stripped away by their abuser. Who would they have been, how would they have turned out, if the abuse had not derailed their life? What resilience, resourcefulness and strength is required to overcome the impacts of child sexual abuse on forming your identity? How can you find your way back - and forward - to yourself?
Featuring (in order of appearance): Les S, Ryan C, Jarad G, Phil S, Lindsay G, Matthew O, Dr Judy Cashmore, Shane Greentree (SAMSN, Clinical Services Manager), Brett Pickard (SAMSN, Eight-week Support Group facilitator).
Resources for survivors:
https://www.samsn.org.au/recovery-and-healing/resources-for-survivors/Thanks to:
All our wonderful interviewees!Rob Carlton and Felicity BlakePeter BolamAnd The National Redress SchemeMusic: Licensed via Audiio.com
OPENING - Matt-Stewart Evans: Finding Hope (Instrumental)PHILLIP - Andrew Word: Fields (Instrumental)RYAN - Philip Daniel: Reverse The River - Strings (Instrumental)CLOSING CREDITS - Seth Öphengon: A Safe Place (Instrumental)
