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In this episode Shelley-Anne Salisbury talks to Lee Jay Berman about how he mediated a particularly challenging dispute involving the four members of a well known best selling rock band. In this new format of The Mediation PodCAST, Shelley-Anne takes a step by step look at how Lee Jay used his highly aclaimed mediation skills to help the band members to resolve some deep conflicts.
About Lee Jay:
Lee Jay Berman began as a full-time mediator 27 years ago, and has since mediated over 2,600 matters. Lee Jay is a Distinguished Fellow with the International Academy of Mediators and a Dispute Resolution Expert with the United Nations Development Programme. In 2017 the National Academy of Distinguished Neutrals named him their inaugural “Distinguished Neutral of the Year and in 2021 the Southern California Mediation Association honoured him with their Cloke-Millen Peacemaker of the Year award. Lee Jay has also been voted by his colleagues into the Who’s Who of International Commercial Mediation and ranked by Chambers USA as one of the top 40 commercial mediators in the U.S. Lee Jay has trained mediators, judges, attorneys, and business leaders worldwide and has published numerous articles on mediation and Alternative Dispute Resolution. The American Bar Association will be publishing two of his books this year.
Contact Lee Jay Berman at
www.mediationtools.com/services
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My guest in this episode is Arabella Tresilian, a CEDR-accredited mediator specialising in mental ill-health, social care and the workplace. She undertakes mediation cases related to Judicial Reviews, Court of Protection, Mental Health Act, Local Authorities, and the NHS - as well as undertaking employment and community cases involving people with mental ill-health. Arabella practices independently and for the Medical Mediation Foundation and Resolve West. She is also an approved Mental Health First Aid instructor and workplace mental health trainer. In 2021, she ran the UK's first Mental Health First Aid course specifically for mediators.
Arabella says:
I help dedicated professionals resolve distressing disputes and disagreements using my psychologically-safe, confidential resolution process, so that parties can get on with their lives and flourish again.”
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My guest is the supremo mediator and author, Charles Parselle. Originally from the UK, he has resided in California since 1983 where he practised as an attorney at law. In 1995 he was appointed as a judge pro tem to the Los Angeles Superior Court and since 2000 has practised as an arbitrator and mediator. He was the founding partner of CEDRS (Centres for Excellence in Dispute Resolution) and the author of several publications on mediation including The Complete Mediator and War Waged with Kisses. Charles is also a leading lecturer and coach on mediation and dispute resolution. Charles talks about all things mediation in his inimitable style and brings great insight into why people become embroiled in conflict and how mediation can be an extremely effective tool in disentangling them.
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Douglas Spoors is an attorney, mediator, trainer, and founder of the Institute for Mixed Method Mediation and the author of Mixed Method Mediation: A Hybrid Approach to Conflict Resolution. He currently serves as the Equal Employment Opportunity Education/ADR Manager for the Navy Exchange Service Command in Virginia where he designs and provides training to over 13,000 associates world-wide. Douglas is Chair of the Outreach Sub-Committee for the Mediators Beyond Borders International, Climate Change Policy Project and also serves on the Board of Directors for the Southern California Mediation Association. In 2019, he received the Ambassador for Peace in Conflict Resolution Award for his contribution in the field of mediation. Douglas says "It’s not about who is right or wrong, it’s about problem solving and finding meaningful solutions".
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Nancy Radford is accredited in Civil & Commercial, Workplace & Employment, SEND (Special Educational Needs and Disabilities) and International Online Mediation, as well as having additional training in restorative facilitation, vulnerable adults, and community mediation. She is a qualified trainer and coach offering conflict coaching, early intervention and training in conflict management and communication skills. She recently won a national mediation award for setting up an Online CPD programme preparing mediators to work online during the pandemic. Prior to going into full time peace-making, Nancy was a researcher, a midwife, a director in a successful family business, a manager, consultant and trainer in public, private & third sector. Nancy says “I like to make myself redundant as a mediator by leaving a legacy instead of a hole”.
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Nicky Perfect's 30 year career in the London Metropolitan Police Force culminated with her being selected as one of a handful of specialised hostage negotiators for the UK and has equipped her with incredible facilitation mediation and coaching skills. Nicky describes how she negotiated her way through high level trauma situations and how she still uses this experience and expertise in her current coaching and other business ventures. It's a fabulous listen with wonderful insights. I think you will agree Nicky is an absolute inspiration.
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Bob Oberstein has been resolving conflicts for over 50 years. He’s represented both employees and employers in the private and public sectors. In recognition of his service Bob was awarded the U.S. Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service Director's Award for lifetime achievement in promoting positive Labour Management Relations. Bob told me his blood type is B positive so positivity literally runs through his veins and he approaches life and mediation with huge optimism. He says there are "no problems only infinite possibilities". I learnt a great deal from Bob and found his positivity infectious. I think you will too!
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Karis Nafte is a pet custody specialist and accredited family mediator. She helps people make fair educated decisions about custody of their pets during divorce. Known for her humane and effective approach with animals, Karis is also a well-respected trainer and dog behaviour consultant with 25 years of experience. She works in collaboration with mediators and attorneys worldwide, and offers regular webinars to educate divorce professionals about pets and the impact of their owners separating. Karis says, animals are not children. They are not possessions. They fall into their own unique category during divorce where they should be seen as individual animals with their own needs.
Karis lives in Capetown with her husband, daughter, four dogs and three cats.
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In this episode Shelley-Anne Salisbury talks to the mediator and conflict coach Gillian Caroe. Originally from Northern Ireland, Gillian grew up in a place of conflict and she discusses, amongst other things, how that experience shaped her attitude to life and led her to a full time career in dispute resolution. Gillian's precise insights into why people become embroiled in conflict are fascinating and it is clearly an area she has given, and continues to give, a great deal of thought. Her calm - almost meditative -approach is enhanced by her wonderful lyrical accent.
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In this episode Shelley-Anne Salisbury talks to the mediator and arbitrator Graham Perry. Graham began his career as a human rights lawyer in the 1970’s in the East End of London and later was appointed an Immigration Judge deciding cases of asylum, immigration and deportation. Graham describes himself as the ultimate mediator - a natural facilitator always looking for solutions, be that within a family or business setting and definitely when acting as a football (soccer) referee . As you will hear, Graham's love of "the beautiful game" is evident throughout the conversation!
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Michael D. Lang J.D has mediated family, workplace and organizational disputes for over 40 years. He has designed and presented mediation and conflict management courses, workshops and webinars globally and created one of the first graduate programs in conflict resolution in the US. Michael was Editor-in-Chief of Mediation Quarterly and is currently an Editorial Board member and Special Advisor to the Journal of Mediation and Applied Conflict Management. He has authored several books on mediation and conflict resolution and is the co-creator and co-editor of “the pandemic books”, the 2021 edition Family Conflict During a Pandemic: Stories of Struggle and Hope is available on Amazon and I was honoured to be invited by Michael to make a small contribution. Michael is also the creator of the video series In Their Voices and facilitates online reflective practice groups for mediators.
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In this episode Shelley-Anne Salisbury talks to Harold Aspis, an experienced and highly-regarded lawyer and arbitrator. Harold has been an associate at a New York City law firm, general counsel of two companies and a senior vice president and legal counsel at a German merchant bank. Harold has a B.A. from Columbia University and a Juris Doctor from its law school and spent his junior year of university studying at the London School of Economics. Harold currently serves as an arbitrator on the panels of the American Arbitration Association, the Society of Maritime Arbitrators and FINRA (the U.S. Financial Industry Regulatory Authority). His colleagues have described him as a 'superb lawyer' and as someone who is a very thoughtful, practical and skilled negotiator.
Harold says “Legal disputes begin in emotion and end in settlement. That's why mediation is so important- it can create an environment in which the parties are encouraged and empowered to reach that settlement”
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In this episode Shelley-Anne Salisbury talks to parole officer Treena Reilkoff, a mediator, psychological health & safety advisor, workplace restoration analyst and resiliency trainer with decades of experience in trauma informed practices. Treena resolves trauma based conflicts , often within high risk and safety-sensitive environments. Treena's insights on mediation - and life in general - are invaluable.
Treena is a super positive person and the following quote by Albert Einstein is printed on her business cards: " In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity".
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In this podcast, the host, Shelley-Anne Salisbury, an accredited Mediator, will be chatting with dispute resolution professionals from all over the world and from a variety of disciplines. She’ll be discussing mediation from their unique perspectives and experiences and asking them about their different approaches.
