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Todd and Cathy discuss who's in the inner circle of the Brat Pack and who is Brat Pack adjacent based on their memories from the 80s and their experience with Andrew McCarthy’s Brat Pack Documentary. They discuss how growth and self-awareness play significant roles in the documentary, and why some individuals evolve faster than others. They also touch on Inside Out 2 and address a listener question about shifting generational cycles.
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Cathy and Todd discuss how women are socialized to become smaller and more restricted, and then begin to unwind and unfold this process once they become aware of what's happening. Cathy provides an overview of this in her Substack titled 'Women Unfolding,' explaining why this is the image she sees in her mind when she works with women. Todd shares his version of men unfolding, and they discuss songs that have parentheses in the title and debate whether or not those parentheses are necessary.
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Todd and Cathy discuss acceptance and emphasize the importance of releasing old ideas and remaining open to new ones in order to figure out how to accept and move forward. They also discuss the reality of nuance and paradox, explaining why decision-making is not about finding the 'right' decision, but rather the right decision for right now. The also talk about Tim McGraw's music and how it reminds us to be our best selves.
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Cathy and Todd discuss why necessary conversations are so difficult to manage and why and how we try to avoid them. They share examples of the experiences that lead to avoidance and offer insights into developing understanding instead. They emphasize why the most challenging and reactive conversations can be pivotal for relationships and lead to greater intimacy.
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Cathy and Todd discuss Netflix's 'Love on the Spectrum' and why the people and families featured make it such a good watch. They discuss the importance of loving, and liking, our children just as they are, and how this allows them to thrive, and they analyze Harrison Butker's speech and why it was offensive in many different ways.
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Cathy and Todd discuss Gen X slang and intertwine the most popular phrases with clips from the most memorable pop culture moments. They discuss how language changes over time and break down the most popular Gen Z slang, offering suggestions on when to use it (or when not to).
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Cathy and Todd discussed the viral "man or bear" debate, addressing why many women felt compelled to pick "bear" and why some men felt hurt or angry. They discussed the importance of listening and empathy when it comes to other people’s experiences and how being defensive might be our initial reaction, but we can choose compassion and understanding. They also discussed why opting out of something we don’t want to do makes room for the things we do want to do. Todd and Cathy are hosting a live discussion about the “man or bear” debate on Monday, May 20th at 7pm CT through the MenLiving platform – all genders are welcome, see below for link to join.
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Todd and Cathy discuss how to talk to kids in the morning without being too annoying. They also discuss when to use Gen Z slang and when not to, and why not "needing" too much from our kids makes us easier to talk to. They also discuss Taylor’s new album, the movie Swingers, and why pop culture makes for great conversation with our kids.
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Todd and Cathy discussed the importance of developing talents and the challenges of pursuing one's passions. They also emphasized the need for understanding and empathizing when teenage boys lash out or question their belonging (they share an audioclip from Dr. John Duffy). They shared the difference between empathy and sympathy, and why it’s important to be really clear about what you need and ask for it. They ended the show by discussing the victim, villain, hero triangle and what it really means when you are 'hero-ing' someone.
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Cathy and Todd discuss the distinction between weaponized incompetence and regular incompetence, exploring how gender norms and societal expectations shape these ideas. They engage in real-time reflection on how they navigate these dynamics within their partnership and parenting, and they stress the need for communication and flexibility depending on the situation. This is a good episode to listen to with your partner or friends! Lots of issues to discuss and process.
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Todd and Cathy discuss two factors that make parenting feel more self-directed and understandable. While it will still be messy, unpredictable, and tiring, at least you will feel more in your integrity while doing it! They also talk about listening skills, anxiety, NCAA basketball, and Beyoncé's new album.
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Todd and Cathy discuss about how genuine curiosity helps our kids really hear us and value what we're saying. The same goes for understanding each other in a partnership or empathizing with someone from a different gender perspective. When we're open about not having all the answers, it paves the way for learning and staying connected.
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Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of emotional conversations with our kids and why we need to pay attention to how we experience and perceive what our children are telling us. They discuss what kids really need from us when they are emotional and how we can support them without absolving or absorbing their pain. They also discuss Friday Night Videos and commercials from the 80’s.
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Todd & Cathy discuss why it’s the ordinary moments that make us feel connected and content, and why what we end up missing are the simple things, not the big things. They also discuss the five things that make someone a Gen Xer, have a follow-up discussion about astrology and its usefulness, and Cathy talks about her new book RESTORING OUR GIRLS, coming in early 2025.
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Todd and Cathy discuss the stories we create about our lives and process whether or not we can reconsider our stories – not to deny reality, but to focus on what’s working rather than what’s lost. They also talk about role models for men, why it’s important to acknowledge every aspect of ourselves, what’s going on with Hall&Oates, and whether or not astrology is a science-based tool.
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Cathy and Todd discuss why we struggle to show up as fully ourselves in groups, and how we can get better at noticing this behavior. Then Todd says, “I’m just not feeling it” so they move into a pop culture conversation that seems to be about nothing, or maybe it was about a lot of little somethings including Bon Jovi, the members of New Edition, why stuffed animals are important, how Cathy got their daughter to stop stealing her brush, why Cathy’s college friends are so funny, and the importance of capybaras, cats, interrogation videos and gorillas on Reels & TikTok. Join Team Zen to hear Cathy & Todd’s talk about bringing genuine romance back into your relationship (3/18, 7 pm).
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Cathy and Todd discuss how our upbringing shapes our current approach to parenting, share why some traditional parenting tricks fall short, and attempt to redefine romance—it's not just about grand gestures, but the heartfelt intentions behind them.
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Cathy and Todd discuss an article from The New York Times titled, 'Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With It,' explaining that staying intimately connected to our older children has benefits, not just risks, and most young adults agree. They discuss the perspectives of previous generations and why things have changed, as well as why it’s easy to stay connected due to devices and the research around effective parenting. They also discuss the fascination with OOTD (outfit of the day) and GRWM (get ready with me) on social media and how we can talk to our kids about comparison culture and self-worth.
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Todd and Cathy talk with Author Nate Klemp about his new book, Open: Living with an Expansive Mind in a Distracted World. They discuss why technology is addictive and so appealing, and how it’s not our fault that we are attracted to screens and scrolling. They also discuss how being closed leads to polarization and conspiracy theories, while staying open reconnects us and helps us see the world in a new and more optimistic way. Nate shares his experiences with screen bingeing, psychedelic-assisted therapy, and meeting people who think differently, emphasizing the importance of being willing to have a conversation.
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Todd and Cathy discuss the explosion of online sports betting and why kids and teens are more likely to develop a gambling disorder than adults. They discuss the reasons why teens use it, how AI is being used to market at them, and how, just like weed, alcohol, and porn, it necessitates an ongoing conversation to make sure our kids understand how it works (not in their favor) and the possible consequences. They also discuss why setting boundaries is essential to practice true empathy and how the 2024 Grammys were a Gen X dream.
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