Episoder
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This past year - what I’m calling my Year of Noticing - has allowed me to slow down in my daily life just enough that I have been able to notice all the really wonderful things around me and also the not wonderful things around me in a way that gives me more time to process all of it. To really integrate the beautiful things, and to really understand the not great things.
I’ve also been able to notice my own patterns and get quite comfortable with them. And when you notice patterns in yourself over weeks and months, you can start to make decisions about what patterns you very much want to change.
What we notice, we can transform.
I am so excited to share with you that we are going to do this together in the new year starting on Wednesday January 10th at 5pm PST / 8pm EST, you can join me and each other in community to simply share what you are noticing.
No cost, no pressure, no requirements other than showing up and sharing — if you wish — what you’ve noticed that week. The magic and the mundane. The truly beautiful and the truly triggering. Know that you’ll have a safe space to share it all or listen to others - or me! - share.
This will be our space to know that no matter what we notice next year, we’ll have a place to share it. Every week. So you get in the habit, the regular daily practice of simply: noticing.
Here's the link to join us every Wednesday at 5pm PST / 8pm EST, starting January 10th:
Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87059207129?pwd=QlJweGZPay9BTE9xeFZ1eDZqNW93UT09
Meeting ID: 870 5920 7129
Passcode: 352852
Cannot wait to see you there!
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Hi. It's been a minute. I'm glad you're still here.
So much has happened to me since our last episode -- from a health scare to the loss of a dear friend. I had to pause and really take stock of how I was living -- always in a state of "needing to heal" and never fully allowing myself to simply live, as my healed self.
It's easy to make "I still need to heal" a story we get stuck in. A loop we can't climb our way out of...to the point that trauma and healing become our identities. And we begin to identify as our trauma first and ourselves second. Or we lose ourselves completely and our personality becomes "healing."
There is a way through it, a way out of the story, a jump out of the loop and it's so simple I missed it for most of my healing journey: it's joy.
I don't want you to miss out on another second of the joy that is available to you at all moments - even as you heal. So! We're going to start cultivating it together. One episode at a time. Join me!
A head-start on this episode and joy:
http://changeofair.com/blog/livethebenefitsofhealing
Follow me on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair
For more tools and insight, visit http://changeofair.com
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When was the first time you realized you don't know basic life things that other people seem to know? Basic life things like bills and taxes and doctor appointments and basic hygiene things like brushing your teeth? I have realized this many times over the last several years of healing. I even have an app on my phone that reminds me to do these things. Really!
This week, I talk about what we didn't learn growing up in disordered homes, why it's okay, and why it's so important to be ever so kind to ourselves as we learn to make them habits we remember as adults. Our parents weren't focused on teaching us those things when we were younger, but that doesn't mean we can't take very good care of ourselves now.
Follow Callie and Change of Air on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair
For more ACoA resources, visit http://changeofair.com
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Workaholism is the perfect construct for adult children of alcoholics. We use our job and career as a crutch to get value externally from the world. So much of the patterns we experience when we were younger can manifest themselves in our work environment, when we don't even realize it.
This week, I take a look at how we become workaholics in toxic workplaces.
For more resources to help, visit https://www.changeofair.com/blog/acoas-at-work-why-acoas-become-workaholics
Follow Callie on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair
For more help, visit http://changeofair.com
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If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I get out and hike in nature nearly every single day. As I've gone through my ACoA journey, being in nature has been one of the greatest tools to help me to get quiet, hear my own thoughts, and process how I'm feeling.
There's actually scientific data that backs up the power of being in nature for humans!
This week, join me by the river in Yosemite as I share why being out in nature can be a huge help. Make sure to wear earbuds when listening so you can really enjoy the river ambience with me.
Follow Callie on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair
For more helpful resources, visit http://changeofair.com
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Yesterday, I did a thing. That thing? Nothing. I did absolutely nothing.
In this episode, I talk about how important it is to remember that our lives are meant to be lived and not always actively worked on. Follow Callie on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair For more resources to help you on your ACOA journey, visit http://changeofair.com
Often we feel pressure to always be healing. But the entire reason we want to heal is so we can live in our lives as more healed versions of ourselves. In order to live in our actual lives, we need to have days where nothing much happens so we can integrate what HAS happened. That allows us to enjoy the lives we've healed to live. -
We grew up in homes where our needs were not met. Where even expressing our needs might get us into trouble or create tension. It's not a surprise that many of us end up living lives where we are never actively choosing us. Never choosing, on purpose, what we want our lives to look and feel like.
Getting quiet enough to listen to our own needs and starting to give ourselves what we need is life-changing stuff. It's how we begin to be in charge of our lives instead of always putting others first.
It can also be scary and uncomfortable. Saying yes to you after many years of saying no brings up a lot of ish.
So how do we begin to choose ourselves? In this episode, we talk about starting really (really, really) small and building from there.
For more resources, visit http://changeofair.com
Follow Callie on Instagram http://instagram.com/changeofair
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As many of you have noticed, I took a bit of a break.
After getting vaccinated, something shifted in me. After 15 months of stress, uncertainty and the kind of hypervigilance only an ACoA can muster, the idea that I might finally be able to relax showed me just how much I had not relaxed at all. It showed me just how much I had been silently carrying and I could see it was too much.
I needed to take a step back. I needed to just be in my life without also trying to survive it. I needed to pause.
In this hike along with me episode, I share with you what I had to work through to come back and I share my most powerful takeaway: it's okay to give yourself what you need. This is your permission slip to pause as needed -- in any area of your life -- and come back when you're ready.
Find more resources at http://changeofair.com
Follow Callie and Change of Air on Instagram
http://instagram.com/changeofair -
Change equals loss. Even when change is good for us. Even when it's taken years to make it happen.
So often after we make a major change in our life, we can feel very different than we expected to feel after making long-desired changes. We feel funky. We get sad. We might have a hard time getting anything done. Sometimes, we yearn for the past, even though we worked hard and are happy to be away from it.
Why is that?
I've noticed myself really feeling this way over the last few weeks after I've made some major changes. Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy and proud of the work I've done. But yet it doesn't feel like that and I couldn't figure out why.
My therapist has shared some great insight with me and I want to share it with you as well so you can use these tools as you are making big, healthy, long-dreamed-of changes in your own life.
To find more helpful resources, visit http://changeofair.com
Follow Change of Air on Instagram: http://instagram.com/changeofair
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Have you ever had a moment where something that shouldn't be a big deal triggers you into something deeper? Into overreacting about a situation? Into thoughts and feelings from the past?
Sometimes those triggers can affect the rest of your day. Most of the time, we don't even understand where they're coming from and why we're reacting so strongly.
This week, I'm talking about these moments. And what we can do in these moments to stay present, stay calm and react appropriate to the situation at hand.
I share one of the most powerful tools in my healing toolkit: The Resilient Zone. I share the specific techniques you can use to process your sensations and feelings real-time so you can honor yourself, understand what is happening, and move on with your day in a safe and healthy way.
For some more insight and resources into today's episode, visit the blog post at https://www.changeofair.com/blog/the-resilient-zone
Visit Change of Air at http://changeofair.com
Follow Change of Air on Instagram at http://instagram.com/changeofair
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It took me a while to realize it. Once I was able to see it, it took my breath away.
For years, I was walking around with bubble wrap. Not physically, but emotionally. Layer upon layer of bubble wrap to keep myself a safe distance from other people. I would think I was fully showing up for friends, family, a partner... but I wasn't.
This week, I want to talk about what it's like once you are able to see this part of your life. And what you may miss from that old life, when you still had all your bubble wrap on. I share what it was like for me and share some tools to help you shed yours, so you can feel safe to be yourself with other people and really connect with them meaningfully.
To learn more about this topic, click here.
Visit the Change of Air blog for more helpful resources.
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An emerging body of research has begun to show us that regular journaling - even for just 15-20 minutes a day - can significantly help those who are struggling with past or current trauma. This practice can not only help you get your thoughts out of you and onto the page so you can begin to understand them, it can also reduce inflammation in the body, boost your immune system and can reduce doctor’s visits.
This week, I share with you how journaling has helped me on my journey not just as an ACoA but as a human who feels all the things. Sharing my story in secret pages with myself was the first way I started to tell my story at all. That sharing helped me process my emotions and begin healing.
In this episode, I share several journal prompts to guide you. By the end of the episode, you'll have your first entry started.
Sit down with a notepad and pen when listening to this podcast.
Get Journaling Resources Here
Find Change of Air on Instagram
To learn more about Callie and Change of Air, visit their website.
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We're always told that healing takes time and that it's ok to take our time. And that's true. And I've taken great comfort in that.
But when I first learned about the ACEs test and the very idea that our past experiences can affect not only our mental health but our physical health, I was stunned. It made healing seem like a far more urgent endeavor.
In today's episode, I talk about the ACEs test which calculates our Adverse Childhood Experiences. I share this tool with you because it dramatically shifted how I think about healing and it gave me every reason I needed to prioritize my healing in a way I never had before.
Link to ACEs resources: https://www.changeofair.com/blog/adverse-childhood-experiences
Link to ACEs test & research: https://acestoohigh.com
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Visit the Change of Air website
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Last week, I talked about tools that are available to help you process your thoughts and feelings as an adult child of an alcoholic.
In addition to the meetings, there are so many other amazing tools that can be of help. They're practices that have helped millions of people for years with their own lives, not just those who are ACoAs. These tools aren't frequently talked about in ACoA circles but they are so powerful when paired with more traditional tools and they've been instrumental in my own healing so I want to make sure you know about them and can access them whenever you need them.
This week, I share the power of yoga, meditation, breathwork, tapping/EFT and journaling.
All the resources I mention in this episode are at: https://www.changeofair.com/blog/mind-body-resources-for-acoas
Follow Change of Air on Instagram
Visit the Change of Air website
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There are thousands of different types of meetings around the world to help those who suffer from alcoholism or those that have loved ones that do. Each meeting is different depending on the location and audience. Each organization is unique and different in what they offer to help.
It might be easy to go to a meeting and think "Oh this isn't right. I don't feel it. Maybe it's me..."
But the truth is: not every meeting is for everyone. Not every organization is for everyone.
It took me years to see WHY that is. Why some meetings work for some and some not for others. And it can even change over the years as we get older. What didn't work in the past might be very valuable today.
In this episode, I'll talk you through the different organizations that offer meetings. I'll talk about how meetings can vary depending not only on the organization, but where in the world you might be.
My goal is to help you find the right set of tools for you and your situation. Not everything works for everyone. But you can find what works for YOU.
Helpful Links:
Adult Children of Alcoholics:
https://adultchildren.org/meeting-search/Al-Anon:
https://al-anon.org/al-anon-meetings/Codependents Anonymous:
https://coda.org/find-a-meeting/Follow Change of Air on Instagram
Visit the Change of Air website
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When you read the list, it might really hit close to home.
When I was 14, I read 13 Characteristics of Adult Children of Alcoholics for the first time.
I knew I came from a different family. But to read the list as a child, I wasn't able to fully process it.
Now that I've read it countless times as an adult, I see it so differently.
In this episode, I'm here to help you go through the list yourself. Whether you've read it before or you're new to it.
Being honest with ourselves is the first step in working through our story.
I'm here to help you take yours.
Click Here to read The 13 Characteristics of Adult Children of Alcoholics
Follow Change of Air on Instagram
Visit ChangeOfAir.com
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It's time.
You no longer need to keep your secret.
In this first episode of Change of Air, I share my story growing up in a family with alcoholics. From how I had to deal with family members as a kid all the way to today, where the trauma from the past can show up in little moments in life when I least expect it.
I share my journey and where I'm at today. I share the healing tools that have worked and those that have not.
In sharing our stories, we realize that we're not alone. When you share your story, you help someone else move courageously through theirs.
We're all on this journey together and I'm honored to create this safe space for us to learn and share and heal together.
It begins with this episode, right here, right now. Find me on Instagram Get resources to help you with your own journey Visit my website -
Change of Air is a weekly resource that offers a safe community, practical tools and powerful mind+body practices for adult children of alcoholics. Change of Air is hosted by Callie Miller, daughter of two alcoholics. She grew up in a home that was disordered, dysfunctional, unsafe for her and her brother, and deeply confusing. It took her years to unpack how growing up in an alcoholic home can affect every aspect of your life. She's now offering all of the tools, both traditional and modern, eastern and western, that helped her heal. This podcast will be a light to you as you navigate your own healing. You are seen and known and loved and supported. It is safe here.
