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It is increasingly common for people to think like narcissists. And until we're aware of what that looks like, there is a risk we do too. We know narcissists have a simplistic view of the world. Here is how you can spot a "narclogic view", why it is nonsense, how you can debunk it (if you need to) and how you can avoid getting caught up in exhausting narcissist games.
#narcissism #manipulation #npd #narcissist
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I just came across an article "what words can destroy a narcissist" on some website. I think it was generated by AI. And it was full of really toxic ideas and thought structures. I recorded my debunking of these ideas that WILL backfire on anyone who tries them.
I really dislike when people take advantage of others. And it's important to recognise bad and unhelpful ideas.
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Here is a sneak preview of some ideas I explore in the book I am writing on narcissism. I finally found an angle I think is relevant and would love to hear what you think. I list the 11 mistakes below.
And if you'd like to accelerate your healing process, why not see if the Healing After Narcissists course might be helpful? It comes with a money back guarantee: https://healingafternarcissists.ribersson.com
The mistakes are:
1. Wanting to diagnose
2. Wanting to understand
3. Wanting to fix them
4. Wanting to not see the obvious
5. Wanting to believe it's our fault, i.e. it's fixable and it's something we did
6. Wanting to always learn more (become obsessed)
7. Wanting to not let go
8. Wanting to believe someone has the answers
9. Wanting a simplistic answer (worldview)
10. Wanting to be validated
11. Wanting a distraction
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Is therapy helpful after being with a narcissist? Is all therapy equal? What are some things to look out for? What was my experience working with a therapist through a breakup WITHOUT being aware of narcissism? I share some thoughts on this topic.
In short, I recommend working with licensed therapists who have experience dealing with personality disorders, otherwise you run the risk of the "both people contributed to the problems". This usually is true, and it is very different when one person is pretending to be someone else.
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When a friend's new partner starts employing Isolation Tactics, or Loyalty Challenge, when they are trying to create conflict between the friend and their Support Group, what is really going on? And if you put down boundaries, are you being unreasonable or… Doing the right thing? Tune in to find out!
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Why don't narcissists admit when they get something wrong? There are two reasons. Until we understand them, we are likely to try to get them to see things from our point of view. That is exhausting and frustrating.
But once we understand why we can't work through things with them, it becomes easier to stop wasting our time and energy.
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When you first realise that someone matches the profile of a narcissist, and you tell your friends, many people will not believe you. There are some common sentences they will use to express. What basically is cognitive dissonance. In this episode, I run through 10 sentences and I share some perspectives and how to approach them.
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What is the first sign of a toxic dynamic? We often look for behaviours and patterns, but maybe the first sign is a feeling we have, a sinking feeling, not feeling good enough. And maybe the first symptom of that is when we stop doing things that we love and that are good for us.
The nice "focus boosting" drink called Magic Mind I mentioned, with many healthy ingredients, has a special offer in January, which you can find here:
https://www.magicmind.com/JANfrederikribersson
And if you use the code RIBERSSON20, you'll get another 20% off your order. I tried and enjoy this drink (who are kindly sponsoring this episode), so am happy to mention it to my audience.
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Narcissists wear us down. It's the same tactics cults use. And their programming will stay with us for years, until we undo it. So the abuse continues. Why do they do they? And what can we do?
The episode is kindly sponsored by Magic Mind, a drink that blends some well recognised mental stimulants to help increase clarity and focus, without overdoing caffeine. This is relevant because the incessant "too little sleep, too much coffee, being awake but jittery, too wound up to sleep, drinking alcohol, too little sleep" cycle makes us far more vulnerable to manipulation from narcissists - as well as just being bad for our health.
They have a special offer in January 2024, if you subscribe for 3 months, you get one month free here:
https://www.magicmind.com/JANfrederikribersson
And if you use code RIBERSSON20, you'll get an extra 20% off.
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Relationships with narcissists can't work out. And the reason is obvious, once we see it. A client was asking if things failed because of what she did, or didn't do, or say, or wear, or some other random detail.
No, obviously not. But she was looked at the wrong level.
In this episode, I share a simple model and question that help see the big picture and give us much needed perspective.
On a different topic, a nice "focus boosting" drink called Magic Mind with many healthy ingredients has a special offer in January, which you can find here:
https://www.magicmind.com/JANfrederikribersson
And if you use the code RIBERSSON20, you'll get another 20% off your order. I tried and enjoy this drink (who are kindly sponsoring some episodes, though not this one), so am happy to mention it to my audience.
- Se mer