Episoder
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I also had the opportunity to interview Michelle Minnikin, an organizational psychologist, executive coach, and author. We chatted about everything from the best way to use psychometric tools in the workplace, to what compelled us to do the work that we do. You can check out part 1 of my conversation with Michelle on today's episode of DISCovering You 👇
It's International Coffee Month! What's your preference?
High D - Espresso: Swift, bold
High I - Macchiato: Sweet, frothy
High S - Latte: Smooth, mellow
High C - Americano: Strong, precise
If you're interested in learning more about team building, coaching, strategic hiring and onboarding, let's connect!
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
Connect with Victoria!
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Hi Listeners! I’m excited to welcome you back for our first episode of Season 3!
Today we’re going to be talking about how to become a Supercommunicator, but before we dive in, Let’s do this month’s DISC analogy.
Of all the metaphors, examples, comparisons I’ve done, Social Media has been the DISC analogy that most resonates with people. I had removed it from my Slide Deck when Twitter changed to X, but based on popular demand LOL, I’ve brought it back. So, I give you, an updated DISC as Social Media:
D – X (formerly Twitter): Direct, concise, thrives in conflict
I – Instagram and tik tok: Hearts abound, (no thumbs up liking as on other platforms) aesthetically pleasing, trendy
S – Facebook: Supportive, more space for connection and conversation
C – Linked In: Facts over feelings, business focused
I read a really insightful book on the hiatus by Charles Duhigg, called Supercommunicators, How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection. Well, you can imagine that got my attention, right? Totally in my wheelhouse.
The book is very comprehensive with tons of great material, which I could never cover here, but I’m going to try and distill the main points.
The author, Duhigg, starts the book by explaining why he was inspired to write it.
He says, “this book was born, in part, from my own failures at communication”.
He goes on to say that he was confused by his failures because as a writer he’s supposed to communicate for a living!
He recounts a story of a work project he was managing and was doing very well at it analytically speaking – doing schedules and logistics. (I’m going to put in my guess right now, that Charles has a High C) 😊
BUT…he realized he was failing at connecting with the people he was working with. When they came to him with issues, he responded with practical fixes. He came to realize that they were looking for empathy, but instead of listening to how they were feeling, he responded with practical solutions.
He also noticed this pattern playing out at home in his family life and this was particularly frustrating because these were the people in his life that mattered the most!
In his quest for understanding, he came away with a key finding:
There are 3 different types of conversations. If we aren’t having the same type of conversation with our partners, colleagues, family members, at the same moment, we won’t be able to connect with each other.
Researchers have studied how our mind operates during different types of conversations. It turns out that different parts of our brains are activated, depending on the type of discussion.
Duhigg breaks down this research into 3 mindsets, each corresponding to a different conversation style. Please enjoy!
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This is the second in a series that I started earlier this year. I’m chatting with some of my clients (each with a different DISC profile) to see how their particular profile operates in the world. I started with High Steadiness, and spoke with Shawn Zigelstein (Episode 26).
Before we dive into that, let’s do this month’s DISC comparison.
National Fashion Day is coming up, so of course it prompted me to explore DISC as Designers!
High D – Jean Paul Gaultier. His designs are known to be unconventional, even audacious.
High I – Versace. Vibrant and exciting.
High S – Ralph Lauren. Consistent, practical
High C – Burberry. Patterned, symmetrical
Today we’re going to be looking at the Influence factor, (High I). I’m pleased to introduce Rachel Hammer as my special guest! Rachel is the founder and leader of Hammer and Associates, a highly successful real estate team in the Ottawa area.
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As AI increasingly seeps into our lives, it's more essential than ever to hone our EI (Emotional Intelligence) skills.
Why?
Emotional Intelligence is what humanizes us, and therefore sets us apart from Artificial Intelligence. These are the facets that simply can not be replaced.
On this episode of DISCovering You, I explore the intrapersonal side of EI, which is understanding and managing emotions in ourselves. Mastering the ability to do this, can bring us to new heights of connection and success.
National Wine Day is next week, so here is DISC as Wine!
High D - Malbec. Full bodied, rich
High I - Sparkling. Bubbly, effervescent
High S - Rosé. Balanced, pleasing
High C - Sauvignon Blanc. Crisp, clean
If you'd like to learn more about Emotional Intelligence assessments and coaching, let's connect!
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
Connect with Victoria!
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Today, I’m going to be looking at how to recruit and hire with the help of DISC, but first…It’s World Art Day so to illustrate (pun intended) this theme, here is: DISC as Art
D – Cubism. Described as Revolutionary and Rebellious. Picasso is an example.
I – Post Impressionism. Colourful, emotive. There’s a focus on the artist’s feelings towards the subject. Van Gogh’s Starry night expresses this.
S – Impressionism. Depicting nature and tranquility. Think Monet’s water lilies.
C – Precisionism – Using precise, sharply defined geometrical forms. Georgia O’Keefe’s early work of cityscapes embodies this.
Okay, let’s get into our topic. I spend a lot of time on this podcast talking about DISC and other tools from a “theoretical perspective”, but today I’m going to get into the very practical applications of using DISC as a recruiting/hiring/onboarding tool.
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
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Today I’ll be exploring the topic of Happiness and breaking it down into 4 Categories.
But as always, we’ll start with a timely DISC Analogy. We are recording on National Jewel Day, so here are how the DISC factors align with jewels. For those of you who are DISC afficionados or loyal listeners you’ll recognize the DISC colours in this example.
High D – Ruby. A vivid shade of red; it symbolizes passion
High I – Canary Diamond. Yellow in colour; it represents happiness and hope
High S – Emerald. Emerald green is associated with balance, harmony and calmness.
High C - Sapphire. This shade of blue is associated with wisdom and truth.
Let’s get into the topic at Hand. The Four Archetypes of Happiness. You know how I love 4 categories of things LOL. Hint: D I S C
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Today, we’re kicking off the first of a series that I’ll be doing over this year. I’ll be interviewing some of my clients (each with a different DISC profile) kind of like case studies, to see how each particular profile operates in the world. A day in the life of…so to speak.
Before we dive into that, let’s do this month’s DISC illustration. It’s OSCAR season, so here is:
DISC According to OSCAR NOMINATED FILMS! (Not necessarily Best Pic noms, could be acting as is the case for the first one):
High D is Nyad - It’s the true story of a woman’s relentless quest to swim from Cuba to Florida. Diana Nyad personifies High D. She’s very direct, driven, and highly competitive.
High I is Barbie - I’m pretty sure most people are familiar with this movie. 😊 It provides all the feels. It runs the gamut of emotions from joy to sadness and discouragement, back to empowerment and inspiration!
High S is The Holdovers - A story about a grumpy teacher at a Prep school who has to babysit some students over Christmas Break. It focuses on unlikely bonds that are created by spending time learning about, and listening to others, culminating in care and support.
High C is Oppenheimer - The movie is very detailed and historically accurate about a physicist and team of scientists who create the atom bomb. The focus on science, confidentiality, and facts over feelings is very High C.
Okay, let’s get to it! There’s a strong focus on different personality and DISC profiles on this podcast, but I thought it might have a stronger resonance by talking to someone who embodies the essence of their profile and to take a walk in their shoes. An opportunity to see the profile in action!
We’re going to start with High S. Yes, that’s right, I’m not doing it in order. High D’s you always get to be first, so…I’m shaking things up LOL
It’s my absolute pleasure to introduce you to Shawn Zigelstein. Shawn has been in the real estate industry for 20 years. He’s the founder and Team Lead of Team Zold, and ranks consistently in the top 1% of sales reps for Royal LePage. He’s also the winner of the 2022 A.E. LePage Realtor of the Year Award.
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
Connect with Victoria!
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Since Valentine’s Day is coming soon, I thought it would be timely to discuss Love Languages on today’s episode! And, on that note, I’ve also incorporated Valentines into this month’s DISC illustration.
So, here is DISC according to symbols of Love:
High D – Red Rose. Vibrant, strong, beware of the thorns though LOL D’s 😊
High I – Heart. The quintessential symbol of love, who better to embody it than I’s who wear their hearts on their sleeves
High S - Love birds – They support each other, they’re loyal (mate for life)
High C - Love Letter. C’s value the written word and what better way to express their thoughts!
Let’s jump into today’s topic – Love Languages! I’m sure many of you are familiar with the book, “The 5 Love Languages” and this is where most of the source material comes from.
I read this book many years ago and had categorized it in my mind, as something for romantic partners only.
So, I was surprised when one of my clients, who represents a large organization, mentioned that they had used the Love Languages as a team building exercise in the past. That caught me off guard initially, but then I started to think about it, and realized that it’s applicable to the workplace as well, and so, here we are!
The concept that different personalities speak different “languages” (air quotes) is a common thread running throughout my work. You’ve heard me say that High Dominance and High Steadiness are polar opposites. And that in order to truly connect, High D needs to learn to speak High S and vice versa!
Same thing goes for love languages. You most likely speak a different one than your partner, or your colleagues.
So, what are the 5 love languages? Listen on to learn more.
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
Connect with Victoria!
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Please enjoy the best of 2023!
Optimism; Friend or Foe? https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/c4a3a55699d106cd5337d7388f8adf27
The Highly Sensitive Person Part 1 https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/c0f9d9df2d33314a4e3a051852dafd30
Thriving As A Highly Sensitive Person https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/29ca59b3d5760c69964fd06b7ed5b82d
Synthesising the S in DISC https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/24458e1ada47c0f82764fb3af6c3952a
Special Guest! Dr. Robin Stern on Emotional Intelligence https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/88ec6c6a9764c5100a1d096dabcf3002
Contemplating the C in DISC https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/808195dbbdb18fa5b02d485fa7f41b79
Building Highly Effective Teams https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/a26d6f9d3dde58a2f6bdf37786cd7356
Exploring Empathy https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/8a5439a280d42be21f82a8b41e66cac7
What's Your Tendency? https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/dc98e91adcb291005d260d7218d69879
How Do YOU Lead? https://pod.link/1614071253/episode/8fda1cc0c168062dfbe1ad65a13c3397
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at mailto:[email protected]
Connect with Victoria!
https://pod.link/1614071253
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Today we’re going to be chatting about Leadership Styles and what each brings to the table.
Before we get to that though, International Cake Day is on the weekend, so of course that means I’m comparing DISC to types of Cake!
High D – Devil’s Food Cake – Strong and substantial, both in texture and flavour
High I – Ice Cream Cake – Whimsical, refreshing
High S – Pound Cake – A staple item, appeals to most people
High C – Bundt Cake – Perfectly formed, a classic
Before I delve into the topic at hand, different styles of Leadership, let me clarify that you don’t have to be in a job where Leader or something equivalent, is part of your title, or even job description. We are all called upon to be leaders from time to time, whether it’s situational – having an important talk with a colleague, providing feedback, setting the tone for your workspace, even in scenarios in our personal lives.
I think there’s a lot of cross-over between leadership at work, and leadership at home, specifically parenting. So, this material is relevant to everyone.
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Do you meet, or resist expectations?
How you answer this question, depends on which of the 4 Tendencies you gravitate towards.
Upholder: meets inner and outer expectations
Questioner: meets inner but resists outer expectations
Obliger: meets outer but resists inner expectations
Rebel: resists inner and outer expectations
Understanding your own Tendency, as well as your colleagues', can be instrumental for workplace collaboration and cohesion.
You can find the link to Gretchen Rubin's quiz here: https://gretchenrubin.com/four-tendencies/
Since it's Halloween, here is DISC according to Candy!
High D is Warheads. Extreme and intense
High I is Sweetarts. Sweet parts and messages of love
High S is Butterscotch Candies. Comforting, long lasting
High C is Smarties. Smart and structured
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Today, I’m going to be talking about Empathy and the role it plays in our personal and professional lives.
If you’re a regular listener, you’ll know that before I get to this it’s time (in the words of my teenage daughter) to make everything about DISC LOL! Here’s this episode’s DISC Analogy - DISC according to… World Cities:
High D – I’ve got to give it to NYC! Loud, Energetic, Work Hard, Play Hard Vibes
High I – Could it be anything other than the city of Love? Paris of course! Romantic, evocative
High S – Geneva. Neutral, peaceful
High C – Singapore. Ordered, disciplined
Okay, today’s episode is about Exploring Empathy. I touched on it briefly during the EQ episodes (5 & 6) because Empathy is one of the cornerstones of Emotional Intelligence.
It’s a key ingredient in building successful interpersonal relationships whether in your personal life or the workplace. And it plays a key role in Leadership. Empathetic leaders propagate loyal team members who want to work hard for them because they feel inspired, valued and seen for who they are and what they’re contributing.
Leading with an absence of empathy creates disconnectedness, resentment and a lack of engagement and productivity.
Wondering how to gauge your level of Empathy?
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Happy September. I'm excited to be back and I hope everyone enjoyed their summer. Today's episode, I'm going to talk about the importance of building a well-balanced team, but first, since it's back to school, back to work time, and for many a return to their exercise regime.
Here is disc according to fitness, high D, weightlifting, competitive results driven high eye is dance, cardio, fun and interactive. High S is yoga, calm, mindful high. C is Pilates structured precisely. If you're a new listener, or really just a reminder to our regular listeners, these analogies are designed to illustrate the essence of each DISC factor. It doesn't necessarily mean that if you have a high D you're gonna lift weights, although I do have several friends and clients who this matches perfectly. Enjoy today's episode and let us know your thoughts!
To learn more about Victoria and her business offerings visit or email her at [email protected]
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On today’s episode I’m rounding out the exploration into each DISC factor with the 4th and final one, High C but not before this month’s DISC illustration. World Music Day is next week, so here is DISC according to genre of Music:
High D - Rap. Direct, Provocative
High I – Pop. Upbeat, fun
High S – Jazz. Smooth, mellow
High C – Classical. Precise, cerebral
Okay, here we go – the last factor (but certainly not least!) in DISC; Compliance.
This word is often met with distaste, both from those who have a High C, YES and those who don’t!
It’s not exactly a fun word, is it? Similar to Dominance in sounding off-putting – the difference is that High D’s don’t mind it (LOL) whereas High C’s do. And you may remember that with Dominance, I said there were a lot of D adjectives that are sometimes used and even swapped out to represent that letter.
The same occurs with C. It is sometimes referred to as Conscientious (that works) Cautious (yep) Correct (totally on brand).
www.discoverwhatworks.org
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Today on the show we have a very special guest! Dr. Robin Stern is the co-founder and associate director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence. She's an author, a speaker, and a licensed psychoanalyst with 30 years of experience.
Dr. Stern coined the phrase Gaslight Effect in her book in 2007, and most recently, she is the host of the Gaslight Effect podcast. I had a great conversation with Robin Stern and we're going to jump right in. Enjoy!
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The 3rd DISC Factor; Steadiness.
People who are High in Steadiness are amiable, dependable, thorough, tenacious, and good listeners. Here is a point of distinction. When we discussed HIGH D and HIGH I, their behaviour is more externalized and they are definitely more the “talkers” whereas HIGH S and C, is more internalized behaviour and they are more the listeners.
S’s enjoy helping others and this often turns into a “purpose” in their personal and professional lives. They are drawn to careers in “helping professions” such as teachers, health care professionals, counselors, mentors.
Famous examples are…Barack Obama, Princess Kate, Dr. Sanjay Gupta.
Listeners, based on this quick description do you think you may be High in the Steadiness factor? Listen on for a quick quiz to find out!
If you are interested in connecting with Victoria for team building, strategic onboarding, coaching, or speaking engagement. You can contact her at [email protected]. Visit https://discoverwhatworks.org/opportunities/ for details.
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Before we dive into our topic, here’s today’s DISC analogy. We are a few days away from National Cocktail Day, so of course, I’m going to break down DISC according to cocktails.
High D – Manhattan. The summary I found on a recipe list described it as: strong in all ways, with some slight bitterness. Not for the faint of heart…
High I – Mojito. Fun, refreshing, vacation vibes.
High S – Gin Fizz. While this sounds bubbly, it’s actually described as being silky, smooth. Whipped egg whites contribute to its slick texture.
High C – Classic Martini. Precision is key in making this drink - especially in measuring the equal parts of dry and sweet vermouth.
Who wants a cocktail now? Did you know that Canada has a national cocktail – can you guess what it is?
Okay, back to our topic. In Part 1, I touched on the concept of HSP and some ways to identify if you, or someone close to you, might be one. We’ll have another quick look at that, but today I’m going to focus on what happens after you know - what are the next steps? How do you take this newfound awareness and ensure that you use it as a superpower, and not a limitation as others (or even you) may have seen it.
As a quick reminder, the word sensitive is not referring to being emotional, it’s about reacting to stimulation. HSP’s are more easily stimulated by noises, lights, pain, hunger because of their high levels of SPS (Sensory Processing Sensitivity)
Since HSP’s represent only 20 to 30 percent of the population, the world isn’t really set up to accommodate. So…make sure YOU understand what you need to thrive, and protect your superpower.
For more information or to book a session or workshop with Victoria visit www.discoverwhatworks.org or reach out at [email protected]
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Today’s episode really hits home and you’ll find out why in a few moments. But first, it’s time for this month’s DISC example…For today’s comparison, I decided to use TV show genres. Soooo:
High D is Action/Thriller – High Stakes, something to get the adrenaline pumping. Some examples are Succession (and honestly, most of the characters on this show are High D’s LOL) and Ozark.
High I is a Rom/Com (Romantic Comedy) – Fun, light, guaranteed to put a smile on your face. For instance, Emily in Paris, or Bridgerton.
High S is a Family Drama – Showcasing ongoing relationships and a deep exploration into character arcs and follow through. This is Us and Parenthood are a couple of examples.
High C is Documentary – Analytical and all about learning! For instance, Planet Earth or My Octopus Teacher.
Back to the subject of today’s episode. Do you know what an HSP is?
The acronym stands for Highly Sensitive Person and was coined by the Psychologist, Elaine Aron, who self describes herself as an HSP and wrote an extensive book on the subject. Find out more in today's episode!
Worth a listen:
Reframing Introversion
So... What is EQ?
If you are interested in connecting with Victoria for team building, strategic onboarding, coaching, or speaking engagement. You can contact her at [email protected]. Visit https://discoverwhatworks.org/opportunities/ for details.
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Today, we’re going to probe the concept of optimism and whether or not it’s always a good thing. Also, if you’re not naturally optimistic, can you learn to be?
But first, since January is the month that has International Flower Day, It’s DISC expressed through flowers:
D – Snapdragon – Like the mythical creature they symbolize strength and sometimes, deviousness!
I – Daffodils – cheerful, symbol of positivity, joy, new beginnings (I’s are starters)
S – Iris – represents wisdom and trust. Like the mentor, supporter, roles that High S’s embody
C – Dahlia – described as graceful, strong and the petals appear to fit “perfectly” on the flower head – you can check out the photos of this on my social media
Back to the topic at hand, where are you on the mood meter? If you’re new to the podcast, you can check out Episode 6 (EQ part 2) to learn more about the mood meter.
Okay, let’s establish some definitions for what we’re going to be discussing:
Optimism is generally defined as hopefulness and confidence about the future or the success of something.
Pessimism is a tendency to see the worst aspect of things or believe that the worst will happen.
My main source for this topic (including the assessment we’re going to discuss) is from Martin Seligman, who is a Professor at the University of Pennsylvania. He’s the former president of the American Psychological Association, Director of the Penn Positive Psychology Center and he’s considered to be the father of positive psychology.
Seligman believes that some of us are born optimists. Just naturally seeing the positive, fun and hope in situations. Conversely, some of us are born pessimists, always inclined to doubt, worry and see negative outcomes.
What Seligman has spent most of his career studying and teaching is a concept he calls Learned Optimism. Yes, he believes optimism CAN be LEARNED.
He defines optimism and pessimism as “habits of thinking”. And that contrary to what was believed before the late 1960’s, these habits can be learned, and therefore changed.
People’s explanatory styles play a huge role here. Meaning, how someone thinks of, and explains the cause of challenges and adverse events.
Seligman refers to these as attributional styles, and he developed an assessment to measure the relationship between explanatory styles and optimism.
We’re going to do a mini-version of the questionnaire first, so you can gain a sense of whether you’re answering optimistically, or pessimistically.
The link to the full Attributional Style Assessment is in the show notes, so you can access it there. https://kihc.ca/the-optimism-test/
For now though, we’re going to do just 6 quick questions:
#1 You lose your temper with a friend:
You attribute this to:
1. They are always nagging me
2. They were in a hostile mood
#2 You win an athletic contest:
1. I was feeling unbeatable
2. I trained hard
#3 Your stocks are at an all time low:
1. I didn’t know much about the business climate at the time
2. I made a poor choice of stocks
#4 Your doctor tells you that you are in good physical shape:
1. I make sure I exercise frequently
2. I am very health-conscious
#5 You buy your spouse a gift...
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Today we have something special for you. If you're new to this podcast, this is the perfect episode to start with as it highlights from the past year. If you hear something that captures your attention, you can go to that full episode and check it out. And for our regular loyal listeners, you'll recognize snippets from our most liked episodes with some memorable, fun, and even silly moments.
We've listened to you. so the most popular episodes are featured. But first, let's do this month's "DISC according to" Any ideas of what it may be? The new year is only days away, so I give you DISC as New Year's resolutions.
High D - Their resolution is going to be conquering a goal. For instance, running a marathon or beating their past race time.
High I - We know our I's enjoy socializing and a party. Coming off the holiday season, they're likely to resolve something like less drinking or less sugar. Let's face it, I's, you don't need either of those since you're naturally sweet and bubbly on your own.
High S - You may be thinking that you want to volunteer more, but I'm hoping you'll also be resolving to take some time for yourselves to recharge your batteries since you spend a lot of it helping others.
High C - Your resolutions will likely be about learning and improving skills, be that taking courses or a long reading list to augment your knowledge.
Happy Holidays!
If you are interested in connecting with Victoria for team building, strategic onboarding, coaching, or speaking engagement. You can contact her at [email protected]. Visit https://discoverwhatworks.org/opportunities/ for details.
- Se mer
