Episoder

  • Driven by a fierce desire to protect her brother from her mother's 'poison', our listener yearns for a relationship with the sibling she tried desperately to protect. But as Katie and Helen peel back the layers of her complicated family dynamics, our listener learns there's so much more to her story than she first thought.

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • As our listener is coming to terms with her emotionally abusive childhood, she asks for our help understanding the lasting impact of suppressing her emotions and 'playing the moods' of her father. After working hard to break the cycle for her own children, she's trying to model healthy communication and relationships for them - but did she do the right thing leaving her marriage?

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

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  • Describing her childhood as growing up in a cult, without access to basic necessities and education, our listener this week struggles to come to terms with the declining health of her parents. Listen to Helen and Katie help Emi tap into her healthy anger about being denied the childhood she deserved.

    TW: religious cult, discussion of death

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. JOIN HERE.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • If you don't cry or dislike when someone around you cries, does that make you cold hearted? That's just one of the concerns that our listener wanted to tackle this week, as Helen and Katie explore her past childhood experiences and the lasting impact it's had on her ability to express her emotions.

    TW: Physical abuse of a child

    You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. Coming soon - join the waitlist here.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Our guest this weeks describes being 'obsessed' with her mother as a child, seeking her adoration and love above all else. She asks for help drawing a line under the past to be able to move forward with her own family, but is this possible if her mother is still the centre of her world?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. Coming soon - join the waitlist here.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: Suicide

    Our guest this week shares how she's been living with her husband's mood swings and silent treatment, but now she's tired of feeling responsible for her family's emotions as well as her own. As the self-described "CEO of the household", she fears that if she steps back, the spinning plates she's been carrying for so long will come crashing down.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. Coming soon - join the waitlist here.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Former "good kid" turned trauma therapist, Maggie Nick joins us this week to talk about trauma and the impact her own childhood has on her parenting, including how she was feeling triggered by her children in ways she never expected. Listen as Helen and Katie unpick the relational trauma and shame that needed to be shed before Maggie could silence her inner critic and become the parent she wished she had.

    •⁠ ⁠Do you hate saying no?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you avoid conflict at all costs?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you never feel good enough?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you feel like a burden?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you find it hard to ask for help…
    •⁠ ⁠…⁠but do everything for everyone else?
    •⁠ ⁠⁠Do you struggle to identify and hold boundaries?

    If that sounds like you, Building Change can help you change all that, whilst giving you a community to do it with. Coming soon - join the waitlist here.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Confused by the family dynamics growing up and the blurred lines between parent and child, our guest this week describes a deep need to understand her past before she can fully move forward. She questions whether she was the golden child or the scapegoat within the family that should have protected her all along. Despite going no contact, she shares her fear of an unexpected run-in or being pushed to reconnect by family members minimising the abuse she experienced.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 65 episodes today on our Patreon page including how to identify if you were the scapegoat, golden child or invisible child in your own family.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    When you've spent your life feeling like you're an 'empath' who's an expert at spotting a lie, what do you do when you can no longer trust your instincts? And is it instinct, or is it trauma? That's the dilemma our guest is facing this week, as she asks how she can trust the opinions and actions of others, when she can no longer trust her own.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    We're honoured to have been joined by Matilda live this week, who's asking for help with understanding the dynamic of her relationship, and asks how she can avoid the internal despair she feels at the first sign of conflict. Listen to Helen and Katie share their thoughts on respectful disagreement, unpicking conflict and power dynamics, and the importance of repairing the relationship afterwards.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Our community is front and centre this week, as we answer YOUR questions! From diagnosing a narcissist to how best to support a sibling, we've loved this opportunity to help our lovely Patrons with the questions that are most important to them. Thank you to everyone that asked a question, we wish we could have covered them all!

    Fancy asking your own question or even a chance to guest-star on the podcast to read your letter? Look out for more info on your exclusive subscriber-only feed over on our Patreon page.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    We're delighted to be joined by ADHD expert and host of the 'I Have ADHD' podcast Kristen Carder this week as she returns to share her personal story of surviving emotional abuse. We talk about how it feels to be forced into a box that simply doesn't fit, and the key takeaways from thousands of hours of therapy that have helped her reconnect with herself and help thousands of clients.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Whether it's because you're no longer fuelling their ego or you're standing up to their manipulative behaviour, being discarded by a narcissist is one of the most devastating things to experience. Originally released exclusively for our Patreon subscribers, we're sharing the 'Discard' episode of The Freudian Slip to everyone this week.
    Enjoyed this episode and want to hear more about the cycle of abuse, family roles, healing strategies and so much more? Unlock instant access to over 60 more in-depth episodes just like this one over on our Patreon page.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    Calling all people pleasers, this one's for you! This week we're replaying one of our community's favourite episodes, originally released back in January 2023. If this episode is a refresher for you, we'd like to ask you to reflect on what's changed for you over the past 18 months as you listen - we hope this is a valuable exercise for you, and enjoy the episode.

    Original: The listener this week is struggling to know whether to stay in her relationship. Feeling unseen and unheard but so in love with her partner, she can't make sense of what's acceptable or not.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: mention of childhood illness

    Stuck in a cycle of breaking up and making up, our listener this week reflects that her upbringing may have led to her missing some red flags in her relationship. But as her patience wears thin and she finally breaks away, the situation is complicated by sharing a workplace. Fearful of what he may be saying about her to their colleagues, she asks if it's possible to stay professional and protect herself at the same time.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    Find What My Bones Know here (aff link) and the recommended exercise on the trauma bond here.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 60 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: mentions of physical abuse, disordered eating and cancer

    With a family unit split down the middle, our listener this week questions why she was punished simply for not being the same as her sister. Each parent picked their favourite daughter and pitted them against each other, in a competition that was rigged from the start. After adding physical distance and being left all but emotionally abandoned, she asks if her family should have done more to repair their relationship, or is she expecting too much?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: physical abuse, abortion, assault, stalking

    From reading childhood diaries to mocking her physical appearance, this week's listener was shamed and belittled by her family at every opportunity. Even after reaching milestones her parents never thought her capable of, she's still grappling with the feeling that despite her own beautiful family, she will never be able to let go of the deep sadness that's still holding her back.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: Sexual abuse, self-harm

    This week we hear how our listener is coming to the realisation that she may have been subjected to covert sexual abuse at the hands of her parents. Despite being expected to run the household as a teenager as well as keep her younger sister safe, she's now struggling to connect with her own feelings. Was it really abuse, or is she just being sensitive?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    Domestic violence article referenced: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/experts-reveal-how-spot-emotional-33201421

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    A move back to the family farm soon becomes a nightmare for this week's listener. She describes her demanding mother in law causing a scene at birthday parties, arriving unannounced in a fit of anger and refusing to listen to reason. Despite her husband reaching the end of his tether and cutting ties, our listener asks why she's the one wanting to fix things for the sake of her children.

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.

  • You’re Not the Problem gives you the tools to recognise and heal from narcissistic and emotional abuse - out now: UK, US (affiliate links)

    TW: Violence

    To those on the outside, our listener's mother has always been the generous, kind and loving parent that's been unfairly denied access to her precious grandchildren. But dig deeper and there's a lifetime of shaming, gaslighting and even excusing physical abuse. Our listener has been given expensive gifts, huge public displays and fancy holidays, but what's the true cost to her and her family?

    Listen to Katie and Helen look at this difficult situation from all angles and offer their insight into what's going on.

    We talk theories and strategies in our exclusive Patreon show, The Freudian Slip. Unlock instant access to over 50 episodes today on our Patreon page, including identifying your family roles, the cycle of abuse, empathy and how to spot a good apology.

    In Sight is sponsored by Pinch of Nom! Buy their amazing cookbook ‘Enjoy’ here!

    Submit your own letter, find free resources and sign up for our weekly newsletter at www.InSightPodcast.com.